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"content": "\n\u003cp>In 2012, psychologist Cindra Kamphoff was running a marathon. Then at Mile 22, her self-doubt started to kick in. She remembers telling herself, “This is dumb. Why am I doing this?”\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>But Kamphoff, who works with top athletes on how to overcome performance anxiety — including from the Minnesota Vikings and USA Track & Field — was prepared. She had written positive phrases on her arm that she could read when she needed a boost during the race: “I’m strong, I’m fast, I’m fit, I’m ready.”\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>This is just one of many techniques that Kamphoff shares in \u003ca href=\"https://www.confidencetools.com/\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cem>\u003cu>The Confidence Habit: 7 Core Practices to Transform Self-Doubt to Self-Belief\u003c/u>\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, published in September. The book offers creative ways to manage fear and negativity — like pretend-flushing your mistakes down the toilet — before, during and after a high-stakes task.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>These tools can be applied to any situation, whether it’s a race, work presentation or a job interview. The goal is for people to “be their best in the moments that matter most to them,” she says.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Kamphoff, who has a PhD in sport and performance psychology, shares four tools you can try today.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003ch2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Move on quickly with “learn, burn, return” \u003c/h2>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Maybe you fumble the ball in a big game or forget the lines in your school play and can’t stop thinking about it afterward.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>If you make a mistake during a high-stakes moment, Kamphoff says it’s important to move on quickly. \u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>She suggests a tool she calls “learn, burn, return” to build back your confidence and keep your goals in reach. Try this if you fumble mid-performance, or as a way to reflect after the event.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Learn: \u003c/strong>Ask yourself, what did you learn? Use this prompt: Next time, I will _____.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Burn: \u003c/strong>Think of a motion or a cue you can use to remind yourself to move on quickly. Kamphoff says you can snap your fingers, say “that fast” or “you might literally pretend to flush a toilet.” \u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>She taught the toilet flush move to former Minnesota Vikings player Adam Thielen, \u003ca href=\"https://www.startribune.com/flush-away-those-mistakes/567674432\" target=\"_blank\">who used it after he fumbled during a playoff game in 2020\u003c/a>. He then went on to catch a 43-yard pass over his head that helped the Vikings win the game. \u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Using the same motion or phrase every time you “burn” helps your brain strengthen new neural pathways when it comes to moving through anxiety, she says.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Return: \u003c/strong>Now it’s time to build yourself back up. Remind yourself, “you got this, you’re doing the best that you can,” says Kamphoff.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003ch2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Speak to yourself powerfully \u003c/h2>\n\n\n\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1200\" height=\"1600\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/10/image1-a754d523.jpeg\" alt=\"Kamphoff wrote these positive phrases on her arm to combat self-doubt during a 2012 marathon. She says they helped her run even faster — and she even went on to win the race in her division.\" class=\"wp-image-66702\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/10/image1-a754d523.jpeg 1200w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/10/image1-a754d523-160x213.jpeg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/10/image1-a754d523-768x1024.jpeg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/10/image1-a754d523-1152x1536.jpeg 1152w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1200px) 100vw, 1200px\" />\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-element-caption\">Kamphoff wrote these positive phrases on her arm to combat self-doubt during a 2012 marathon. She says they helped her run even faster — and she even went on to win the race in her division. \u003ccite> (Cindra Kamphoff)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>How you talk to yourself matters, Kamphoff says. According to the American Psychological Association, self-affirmations, even in small doses, \u003ca href=\"https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2025/10/self-affirmations-well-being\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cu>can have lasting effects on our self-esteem\u003c/u>\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>When Kamphoff wrote positive messages on her arm to motivate her during her marathon, they worked because she was giving her brain evidence that she could be successful.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>As Kamphoff repeated these phrases during her race, her pace picked up. She ended up not only winning the race in her division, but running her last four miles the fastest out of any part of the marathon.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>To make what Kamphoff calls a\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>“power phrase,” choose a statement that starts with \u003cem>I will\u003c/em>, \u003cem>I can\u003c/em> or \u003cem>I am\u003c/em>. Then ask yourself, \u003cem>How am I at my best? What does that look like? What does that feel like?\u003c/em>” \u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Kamphoff chose phrases that reminded her of her love for running — and that she had trained for hundreds of miles to run the race.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003ch2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Set gold, silver and bronze goals \u003c/h2>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Instead of focusing on one perfect outcome, set a range of goals for yourself. Kamphoff recommends creating a “gold, silver and bronze goal,” she says.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Let’s say you’re running the mile in track. Your bronze goal might be running a time you’re generally happy with, your silver goal might be to run a personal best, and your gold goal might be to win the race.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>This can help decrease anxiety and increase confidence by removing the pressure of one ideal performance and shifting focus to the present moment. Especially because “an outcome is something you can’t control,” she says. \u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003ch2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Fact-check your self-doubt \u003c/h2>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>If you’re feeling overcome with negative thoughts right before a job interview or a big test, ask yourself three questions:\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n\u003cli>Is that thought true? \u003c/li>\n\n\n\n\u003cli>Is that thought serving you? \u003c/li>\n\n\n\n\u003cli>What would be a more empowering statement? \u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>This method is similar to other frameworks, like acceptance commitment therapy and cognitive behavioral therapy. It can pause negative thoughts and help you get back to the present moment.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>For example, if you walk into a job interview thinking, “If I don’t ace this, I’ll never get another job,” this exercise can challenge that thought. And it can help you find a more positive, grounded alternative: “Even if I don’t get this job, I know I’m capable of success and that there are better opportunities for me.” \u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Remember, she says. Confidence is a choice you get to make.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>“You get to decide in the moment, are you going to be confident?” she says. “Many times the action of confidence comes before the feeling, and it’s a skill.”\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003chr class=\"wp-block-separator has-css-opacity\"/>\n\n\n\n\u003ch2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">More anxiety-busting strategies from Life kit\u003c/h2>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2024/01/15/1199885895/soothe-stress-in-minutes\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>Feeling anxious? Try smiling or doing a good deed to snap out of it\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>. Feeling overwhelmed, panicked or anxious? Clinical psychologist Jenny Taitz offers simple techniques to improve your mood and calm your body and mind in minutes.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2026/07/20/nx-s1-5894845/so-distressed-you-cant-think-straight-lower-the-intensity-with-these-4-skills\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>So distressed you can’t think straight? Lower the intensity with these 4 skills.\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>A clinical psychologist shares effective strategies to quickly de-escalate stress and anxiety. That includes dunking your head into a bowl of ice water to trigger your mammalian dive reflex.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2026/03/07/nx-s1-5734392/sleep-better-wind-down-routine-bedtime-rituals\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>Too hyped up to sleep? Rituals to calm your body and mind before bed\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cstrong>. \u003c/strong>People struggling with insomnia tend to hyperfocus on the fact that they can’t sleep, which can prevent them from getting any shut-eye. Experts share effective practices to overcome sleep stress.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2026/01/15/nx-s1-5611117/beat-anxiety-insomnia-get-back-to-sleep\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>4 ways to end the cycle of sleep anxiety.\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>People struggling with insomnia tend to hyperfocus on the fact that they can’t sleep, which can prevent them from getting any shut-eye. Experts share effective practices to overcome sleep stress.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003chr class=\"wp-block-separator has-css-opacity\"/>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003cem>This digital story was edited by Malaka Gharib. The visual editor is CJ Riculan.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003cem>We’d love to hear from you. Email us at LifeKit@npr.org. Listen to Life Kit on\u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"http://n.pr/3LdRb0X\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cem> Apple Podcasts\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem> and\u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"http://n.pr/3K3xVln\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cem> Spotify\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>, and sign up for our\u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"http://n.pr/3xN1tB9\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cem> newsletter\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\u003c/p>\n",
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>How you talk to yourself matters, Kamphoff says. According to the American Psychological Association, self-affirmations, even in small doses, \u003ca href=\"https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2025/10/self-affirmations-well-being\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cu>can have lasting effects on our self-esteem\u003c/u>\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n",
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>When Kamphoff wrote positive messages on her arm to motivate her during her marathon, they worked because she was giving her brain evidence that she could be successful.\u003c/p>\n",
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>As Kamphoff repeated these phrases during her race, her pace picked up. She ended up not only winning the race in her division, but running her last four miles the fastest out of any part of the marathon.\u003c/p>\n",
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>To make what Kamphoff calls a\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>“power phrase,” choose a statement that starts with \u003cem>I will\u003c/em>, \u003cem>I can\u003c/em> or \u003cem>I am\u003c/em>. Then ask yourself, \u003cem>How am I at my best? What does that look like? What does that feel like?\u003c/em>” \u003c/p>\n",
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"\n\u003cp>To make what Kamphoff calls a\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>“power phrase,” choose a statement that starts with \u003cem>I will\u003c/em>, \u003cem>I can\u003c/em> or \u003cem>I am\u003c/em>. Then ask yourself, \u003cem>How am I at my best? What does that look like? What does that feel like?\u003c/em>” \u003c/p>\n"
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>Kamphoff chose phrases that reminded her of her love for running — and that she had trained for hundreds of miles to run the race.\u003c/p>\n",
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>Instead of focusing on one perfect outcome, set a range of goals for yourself. Kamphoff recommends creating a “gold, silver and bronze goal,” she says.\u003c/p>\n",
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>Let’s say you’re running the mile in track. Your bronze goal might be running a time you’re generally happy with, your silver goal might be to run a personal best, and your gold goal might be to win the race.\u003c/p>\n",
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>This can help decrease anxiety and increase confidence by removing the pressure of one ideal performance and shifting focus to the present moment. Especially because “an outcome is something you can’t control,” she says. \u003c/p>\n",
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>If you’re feeling overcome with negative thoughts right before a job interview or a big test, ask yourself three questions:\u003c/p>\n",
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>This method is similar to other frameworks, like acceptance commitment therapy and cognitive behavioral therapy. It can pause negative thoughts and help you get back to the present moment.\u003c/p>\n",
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>For example, if you walk into a job interview thinking, “If I don’t ace this, I’ll never get another job,” this exercise can challenge that thought. And it can help you find a more positive, grounded alternative: “Even if I don’t get this job, I know I’m capable of success and that there are better opportunities for me.” \u003c/p>\n",
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"text": "More anxiety-busting strategies from Life kit",
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2024/01/15/1199885895/soothe-stress-in-minutes\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>Feeling anxious? Try smiling or doing a good deed to snap out of it\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>. Feeling overwhelmed, panicked or anxious? Clinical psychologist Jenny Taitz offers simple techniques to improve your mood and calm your body and mind in minutes.\u003c/p>\n",
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"\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2024/01/15/1199885895/soothe-stress-in-minutes\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>Feeling anxious? Try smiling or doing a good deed to snap out of it\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>. Feeling overwhelmed, panicked or anxious? Clinical psychologist Jenny Taitz offers simple techniques to improve your mood and calm your body and mind in minutes.\u003c/p>\n"
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2026/07/20/nx-s1-5894845/so-distressed-you-cant-think-straight-lower-the-intensity-with-these-4-skills\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>So distressed you can’t think straight? Lower the intensity with these 4 skills.\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>A clinical psychologist shares effective strategies to quickly de-escalate stress and anxiety. That includes dunking your head into a bowl of ice water to trigger your mammalian dive reflex.\u003c/p>\n",
"innerContent": [
"\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2026/07/20/nx-s1-5894845/so-distressed-you-cant-think-straight-lower-the-intensity-with-these-4-skills\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>So distressed you can’t think straight? Lower the intensity with these 4 skills.\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>A clinical psychologist shares effective strategies to quickly de-escalate stress and anxiety. That includes dunking your head into a bowl of ice water to trigger your mammalian dive reflex.\u003c/p>\n"
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2026/03/07/nx-s1-5734392/sleep-better-wind-down-routine-bedtime-rituals\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>Too hyped up to sleep? Rituals to calm your body and mind before bed\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cstrong>. \u003c/strong>People struggling with insomnia tend to hyperfocus on the fact that they can’t sleep, which can prevent them from getting any shut-eye. Experts share effective practices to overcome sleep stress.\u003c/p>\n",
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"\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2026/03/07/nx-s1-5734392/sleep-better-wind-down-routine-bedtime-rituals\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>Too hyped up to sleep? Rituals to calm your body and mind before bed\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cstrong>. \u003c/strong>People struggling with insomnia tend to hyperfocus on the fact that they can’t sleep, which can prevent them from getting any shut-eye. Experts share effective practices to overcome sleep stress.\u003c/p>\n"
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2026/01/15/nx-s1-5611117/beat-anxiety-insomnia-get-back-to-sleep\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>4 ways to end the cycle of sleep anxiety.\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>People struggling with insomnia tend to hyperfocus on the fact that they can’t sleep, which can prevent them from getting any shut-eye. Experts share effective practices to overcome sleep stress.\u003c/p>\n",
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"\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2026/01/15/nx-s1-5611117/beat-anxiety-insomnia-get-back-to-sleep\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>4 ways to end the cycle of sleep anxiety.\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>People struggling with insomnia tend to hyperfocus on the fact that they can’t sleep, which can prevent them from getting any shut-eye. Experts share effective practices to overcome sleep stress.\u003c/p>\n"
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>\u003cem>This digital story was edited by Malaka Gharib. The visual editor is CJ Riculan.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n",
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"innerHTML": "\n\u003cp>\u003cem>We’d love to hear from you. Email us at LifeKit@npr.org. Listen to Life Kit on\u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"http://n.pr/3LdRb0X\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cem> Apple Podcasts\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem> and\u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"http://n.pr/3K3xVln\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cem> Spotify\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>, and sign up for our\u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"http://n.pr/3xN1tB9\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cem> newsletter\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\u003c/p>\n",
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"excerpt": "Worried about stumbling before a high-stakes event, like a race or a job interview? Psychologist Cindra Kamphoff offers creative strategies to overcome the jitters and build confidence in the moment.",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>In 2012, psychologist Cindra Kamphoff was running a marathon. Then at Mile 22, her self-doubt started to kick in. She remembers telling herself, “This is dumb. Why am I doing this?”\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>But Kamphoff, who works with top athletes on how to overcome performance anxiety — including from the Minnesota Vikings and USA Track & Field — was prepared. She had written positive phrases on her arm that she could read when she needed a boost during the race: “I’m strong, I’m fast, I’m fit, I’m ready.”\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>This is just one of many techniques that Kamphoff shares in \u003ca href=\"https://www.confidencetools.com/\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cem>\u003cu>The Confidence Habit: 7 Core Practices to Transform Self-Doubt to Self-Belief\u003c/u>\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, published in September. The book offers creative ways to manage fear and negativity — like pretend-flushing your mistakes down the toilet — before, during and after a high-stakes task.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>These tools can be applied to any situation, whether it’s a race, work presentation or a job interview. The goal is for people to “be their best in the moments that matter most to them,” she says.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Kamphoff, who has a PhD in sport and performance psychology, shares four tools you can try today.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003ch2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Move on quickly with “learn, burn, return” \u003c/h2>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Maybe you fumble the ball in a big game or forget the lines in your school play and can’t stop thinking about it afterward.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>If you make a mistake during a high-stakes moment, Kamphoff says it’s important to move on quickly. \u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>She suggests a tool she calls “learn, burn, return” to build back your confidence and keep your goals in reach. Try this if you fumble mid-performance, or as a way to reflect after the event.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Learn: \u003c/strong>Ask yourself, what did you learn? Use this prompt: Next time, I will _____.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Burn: \u003c/strong>Think of a motion or a cue you can use to remind yourself to move on quickly. Kamphoff says you can snap your fingers, say “that fast” or “you might literally pretend to flush a toilet.” \u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>She taught the toilet flush move to former Minnesota Vikings player Adam Thielen, \u003ca href=\"https://www.startribune.com/flush-away-those-mistakes/567674432\" target=\"_blank\">who used it after he fumbled during a playoff game in 2020\u003c/a>. He then went on to catch a 43-yard pass over his head that helped the Vikings win the game. \u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Using the same motion or phrase every time you “burn” helps your brain strengthen new neural pathways when it comes to moving through anxiety, she says.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Return: \u003c/strong>Now it’s time to build yourself back up. Remind yourself, “you got this, you’re doing the best that you can,” says Kamphoff.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003ch2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Speak to yourself powerfully \u003c/h2>\n\n\n\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1200\" height=\"1600\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/10/image1-a754d523.jpeg\" alt=\"Kamphoff wrote these positive phrases on her arm to combat self-doubt during a 2012 marathon. She says they helped her run even faster — and she even went on to win the race in her division.\" class=\"wp-image-66702\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/10/image1-a754d523.jpeg 1200w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/10/image1-a754d523-160x213.jpeg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/10/image1-a754d523-768x1024.jpeg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/10/image1-a754d523-1152x1536.jpeg 1152w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1200px) 100vw, 1200px\" />\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-element-caption\">Kamphoff wrote these positive phrases on her arm to combat self-doubt during a 2012 marathon. She says they helped her run even faster — and she even went on to win the race in her division. \u003ccite> (Cindra Kamphoff)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>How you talk to yourself matters, Kamphoff says. According to the American Psychological Association, self-affirmations, even in small doses, \u003ca href=\"https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2025/10/self-affirmations-well-being\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cu>can have lasting effects on our self-esteem\u003c/u>\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>When Kamphoff wrote positive messages on her arm to motivate her during her marathon, they worked because she was giving her brain evidence that she could be successful.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>As Kamphoff repeated these phrases during her race, her pace picked up. She ended up not only winning the race in her division, but running her last four miles the fastest out of any part of the marathon.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>To make what Kamphoff calls a\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>“power phrase,” choose a statement that starts with \u003cem>I will\u003c/em>, \u003cem>I can\u003c/em> or \u003cem>I am\u003c/em>. Then ask yourself, \u003cem>How am I at my best? What does that look like? What does that feel like?\u003c/em>” \u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Kamphoff chose phrases that reminded her of her love for running — and that she had trained for hundreds of miles to run the race.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003ch2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Set gold, silver and bronze goals \u003c/h2>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Instead of focusing on one perfect outcome, set a range of goals for yourself. Kamphoff recommends creating a “gold, silver and bronze goal,” she says.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Let’s say you’re running the mile in track. Your bronze goal might be running a time you’re generally happy with, your silver goal might be to run a personal best, and your gold goal might be to win the race.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>This can help decrease anxiety and increase confidence by removing the pressure of one ideal performance and shifting focus to the present moment. Especially because “an outcome is something you can’t control,” she says. \u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003ch2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Fact-check your self-doubt \u003c/h2>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>If you’re feeling overcome with negative thoughts right before a job interview or a big test, ask yourself three questions:\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n\u003cli>Is that thought true? \u003c/li>\n\n\n\n\u003cli>Is that thought serving you? \u003c/li>\n\n\n\n\u003cli>What would be a more empowering statement? \u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>This method is similar to other frameworks, like acceptance commitment therapy and cognitive behavioral therapy. It can pause negative thoughts and help you get back to the present moment.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>For example, if you walk into a job interview thinking, “If I don’t ace this, I’ll never get another job,” this exercise can challenge that thought. And it can help you find a more positive, grounded alternative: “Even if I don’t get this job, I know I’m capable of success and that there are better opportunities for me.” \u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>Remember, she says. Confidence is a choice you get to make.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>“You get to decide in the moment, are you going to be confident?” she says. “Many times the action of confidence comes before the feeling, and it’s a skill.”\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003chr class=\"wp-block-separator has-css-opacity\"/>\n\n\n\n\u003ch2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">More anxiety-busting strategies from Life kit\u003c/h2>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2024/01/15/1199885895/soothe-stress-in-minutes\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>Feeling anxious? Try smiling or doing a good deed to snap out of it\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>. Feeling overwhelmed, panicked or anxious? Clinical psychologist Jenny Taitz offers simple techniques to improve your mood and calm your body and mind in minutes.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2026/07/20/nx-s1-5894845/so-distressed-you-cant-think-straight-lower-the-intensity-with-these-4-skills\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>So distressed you can’t think straight? Lower the intensity with these 4 skills.\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>A clinical psychologist shares effective strategies to quickly de-escalate stress and anxiety. That includes dunking your head into a bowl of ice water to trigger your mammalian dive reflex.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2026/03/07/nx-s1-5734392/sleep-better-wind-down-routine-bedtime-rituals\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>Too hyped up to sleep? Rituals to calm your body and mind before bed\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cstrong>. \u003c/strong>People struggling with insomnia tend to hyperfocus on the fact that they can’t sleep, which can prevent them from getting any shut-eye. Experts share effective practices to overcome sleep stress.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2026/01/15/nx-s1-5611117/beat-anxiety-insomnia-get-back-to-sleep\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>4 ways to end the cycle of sleep anxiety.\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>People struggling with insomnia tend to hyperfocus on the fact that they can’t sleep, which can prevent them from getting any shut-eye. Experts share effective practices to overcome sleep stress.\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003chr class=\"wp-block-separator has-css-opacity\"/>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003cem>This digital story was edited by Malaka Gharib. The visual editor is CJ Riculan.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\n\n\u003cp>\u003cem>We’d love to hear from you. Email us at LifeKit@npr.org. Listen to Life Kit on\u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"http://n.pr/3LdRb0X\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cem> Apple Podcasts\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem> and\u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"http://n.pr/3K3xVln\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cem> Spotify\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>, and sign up for our\u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"http://n.pr/3xN1tB9\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cem> newsletter\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\u003c/p>\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cp>Last year, Susana Beltrán-Grimm was visiting Hispanic families for a research project about parents and math, when she started to notice a trend. Parents didn’t want to talk about math with the Portland State University professor. Instead, they wanted to talk about their fears as immigration enforcement ramped up across the country.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The concern was, ‘This is happening, and I’m scared to go to work, I’m scared to take my child to the park. I don’t feel comfortable taking them to school,’” Beltrán-Grimm said. Many parents told her, “I’m trying to figure out how I’m not as stressed so I don’t stress my child,” she recalled.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>These comments led Beltrán-Grimm to launch a small pilot study looking at how parental stress and fear around immigration enforcement was affecting children, and specifically, their opportunities to play. Her initial findings painted a clear picture: Parents were so fearful of immigration enforcement, they were avoiding taking their kids to playgrounds and parks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“They’re living in survival mode,” said Beltrán-Grimm. That has consequences for young children, she added, who are now losing out on chances to play and can easily pick up on their parents’ anxiety. “That’s not a good way for a child to develop,” she added.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Beltrán-Grimm’s initial findings from the pilot study, which is expanding this year to nearly 500 additional families, add to a growing body of research tracking the effects of aggressive immigration enforcement on the mental health of young children. Experts say such policies, like those that have been playing out across the country since President Donald Trump took office last year, are felt not only by immigrant children, but \u003ca href=\"https://news.ucr.edu/articles/2025/08/08/child-mental-health-crisis-tied-immigration-enforcement\">also by children\u003c/a> whose families are not at risk of deportation.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Kids know about people being taken, and they worry. That diffused fear just spreads,” said Joanna Dreby, a professor of sociology at the University of Albany. Dreby said she expects this anxiety to affect more children as they see and hear about violent events involving Immigration and Customs Enforcement, like accounts of U.S. citizens getting detained or shot. “As more and more children are being exposed to those severe episodes, then more and more children are going to carry those fears,” Dreby said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Research shows children can \u003ca href=\"https://www.clasp.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/01/2018_ourchildrensfears.pdf\">display troubling behaviors\u003c/a> when their communities are targeted by immigration enforcement, including increased aggression, separation anxiety and withdrawal.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Parents and early educators have \u003ca href=\"https://www.clasp.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/01/2018_ourchildrensfears.pdf\">long reported\u003c/a> increased aggression, separation anxiety and withdrawal among children when \u003ca href=\"https://www.apha.org/policy-and-advocacy/public-health-policy-briefs/policy-database/2014/07/18/11/24/opposing-the-dhs-ice-secure-communities-program\">administrations ramp up immigration enforcement\u003c/a>, with worse effects for those who fear enforcement.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If that anxiety is left unaddressed, there can be long-term consequences. Exposure to immigration enforcement in childhood has been \u003ca href=\"https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0190740925001598\">found to lead to long-term anxiety\u003c/a>, PTSD and depression in adolescence and young adulthood. Young children are especially vulnerable to trauma because their brains are rapidly developing during the first five years of life, and that development can be highly influenced by stress hormones.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dreby, who has spent years interviewing and studying children who have experienced immigration enforcement to some degree, said the longer enforcement goes on, the more children can be affected. It’s even more damaging if they witness arrests. “Unfortunately, some of the things we found most harmful for children are exactly the tactics currently being used by federal immigration enforcement agents,” she said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“There is absolutely no reason that immigration regulation has to unfold in this way that’s very public, that’s in front of children,” Dreby added. “That needs to stop immediately.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Although parents can often serve as buffers for trauma, they may struggle to do so when they are also overly stressed and anxious. A \u003ca href=\"https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9132160/\">2021\u003c/a> study of pre-K students in New York City, for example, found when parents felt higher levels of immigration enforcement threat, children showed lower levels of self-regulation skills, especially around their ability to pay attention. Children in those families also experienced greater separation anxiety and overanxious behaviors.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The stress of parents is certainly trickling down to children,” said Suma Setty, a senior policy analyst for immigration and immigrant families at the Center for Law and Social Policy. In her previous research, Setty has heard accounts of children as young as 3 saying they were scared of losing their parents to deportation. “It’s very apparent in their behavior that stress is impacting them, and that has long-term implications,” she added.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While interviewing parents, child care providers and professionals who interact with children over the past six months, Setty has heard widespread reports of children having trouble sleeping, showing fear of police, regressing in skills like potty training and being more emotionally reactive. One respondent shared a story about a child who asked her mom to teach her how to cook, so the girl would be able to feed herself if her mom was deported. A child care provider told Setty that children in her program used to be curious about visitors, but now hide behind their teacher when someone new enters the building.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In Minnesota, where ICE has engaged in violent clashes over the last month, Sonia Mayren, a Minneapolis-based clinical trainee who specializes in child trauma and works largely with the Latino population, has seen a sharp uptick in anxiety among her patients. Many of the children she serves have regressed behaviorally. In recent months, all of her clients have moved their sessions online. Several have stopped therapy altogether.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Like Dreby, Mayren is also hearing about children fearing immigration agents even if their family is not at risk of enforcement. “It’s not just, ‘I’m afraid of ICE detaining my friends or family,’ it’s, ‘I’m afraid of ICE in general, because they can come hurt us,’” she said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mayren is telling parents to be patient with children, try to protect them from the news and maintain routines, especially if kids have been pulled out of school. She also encourages parents to find mental health assistance to try to keep kids stable, with the caveat that they may not see much improvement in their kids’ mental health while immigration enforcement remains so aggressive and visible.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We’re just keeping children’s heads above water now because they’re in a state of emergency,” she said. “It’s just survival.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>This story about immigration raids was produced by The Hechinger Report, a nonprofit, independent news organization focused on inequality and innovation in education. Sign up for the \u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/earlychildhood\">newsletter here\u003c/a>. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Last year, Susana Beltrán-Grimm was visiting Hispanic families for a research project about parents and math, when she started to notice a trend. Parents didn’t want to talk about math with the Portland State University professor. Instead, they wanted to talk about their fears as immigration enforcement ramped up across the country.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The concern was, ‘This is happening, and I’m scared to go to work, I’m scared to take my child to the park. I don’t feel comfortable taking them to school,’” Beltrán-Grimm said. Many parents told her, “I’m trying to figure out how I’m not as stressed so I don’t stress my child,” she recalled.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>These comments led Beltrán-Grimm to launch a small pilot study looking at how parental stress and fear around immigration enforcement was affecting children, and specifically, their opportunities to play. Her initial findings painted a clear picture: Parents were so fearful of immigration enforcement, they were avoiding taking their kids to playgrounds and parks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“They’re living in survival mode,” said Beltrán-Grimm. That has consequences for young children, she added, who are now losing out on chances to play and can easily pick up on their parents’ anxiety. “That’s not a good way for a child to develop,” she added.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Beltrán-Grimm’s initial findings from the pilot study, which is expanding this year to nearly 500 additional families, add to a growing body of research tracking the effects of aggressive immigration enforcement on the mental health of young children. Experts say such policies, like those that have been playing out across the country since President Donald Trump took office last year, are felt not only by immigrant children, but \u003ca href=\"https://news.ucr.edu/articles/2025/08/08/child-mental-health-crisis-tied-immigration-enforcement\">also by children\u003c/a> whose families are not at risk of deportation.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Kids know about people being taken, and they worry. That diffused fear just spreads,” said Joanna Dreby, a professor of sociology at the University of Albany. Dreby said she expects this anxiety to affect more children as they see and hear about violent events involving Immigration and Customs Enforcement, like accounts of U.S. citizens getting detained or shot. “As more and more children are being exposed to those severe episodes, then more and more children are going to carry those fears,” Dreby said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Research shows children can \u003ca href=\"https://www.clasp.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/01/2018_ourchildrensfears.pdf\">display troubling behaviors\u003c/a> when their communities are targeted by immigration enforcement, including increased aggression, separation anxiety and withdrawal.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Parents and early educators have \u003ca href=\"https://www.clasp.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/01/2018_ourchildrensfears.pdf\">long reported\u003c/a> increased aggression, separation anxiety and withdrawal among children when \u003ca href=\"https://www.apha.org/policy-and-advocacy/public-health-policy-briefs/policy-database/2014/07/18/11/24/opposing-the-dhs-ice-secure-communities-program\">administrations ramp up immigration enforcement\u003c/a>, with worse effects for those who fear enforcement.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If that anxiety is left unaddressed, there can be long-term consequences. Exposure to immigration enforcement in childhood has been \u003ca href=\"https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0190740925001598\">found to lead to long-term anxiety\u003c/a>, PTSD and depression in adolescence and young adulthood. Young children are especially vulnerable to trauma because their brains are rapidly developing during the first five years of life, and that development can be highly influenced by stress hormones.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dreby, who has spent years interviewing and studying children who have experienced immigration enforcement to some degree, said the longer enforcement goes on, the more children can be affected. It’s even more damaging if they witness arrests. “Unfortunately, some of the things we found most harmful for children are exactly the tactics currently being used by federal immigration enforcement agents,” she said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“There is absolutely no reason that immigration regulation has to unfold in this way that’s very public, that’s in front of children,” Dreby added. “That needs to stop immediately.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Although parents can often serve as buffers for trauma, they may struggle to do so when they are also overly stressed and anxious. A \u003ca href=\"https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9132160/\">2021\u003c/a> study of pre-K students in New York City, for example, found when parents felt higher levels of immigration enforcement threat, children showed lower levels of self-regulation skills, especially around their ability to pay attention. Children in those families also experienced greater separation anxiety and overanxious behaviors.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The stress of parents is certainly trickling down to children,” said Suma Setty, a senior policy analyst for immigration and immigrant families at the Center for Law and Social Policy. In her previous research, Setty has heard accounts of children as young as 3 saying they were scared of losing their parents to deportation. “It’s very apparent in their behavior that stress is impacting them, and that has long-term implications,” she added.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While interviewing parents, child care providers and professionals who interact with children over the past six months, Setty has heard widespread reports of children having trouble sleeping, showing fear of police, regressing in skills like potty training and being more emotionally reactive. One respondent shared a story about a child who asked her mom to teach her how to cook, so the girl would be able to feed herself if her mom was deported. A child care provider told Setty that children in her program used to be curious about visitors, but now hide behind their teacher when someone new enters the building.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In Minnesota, where ICE has engaged in violent clashes over the last month, Sonia Mayren, a Minneapolis-based clinical trainee who specializes in child trauma and works largely with the Latino population, has seen a sharp uptick in anxiety among her patients. Many of the children she serves have regressed behaviorally. In recent months, all of her clients have moved their sessions online. Several have stopped therapy altogether.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Like Dreby, Mayren is also hearing about children fearing immigration agents even if their family is not at risk of enforcement. “It’s not just, ‘I’m afraid of ICE detaining my friends or family,’ it’s, ‘I’m afraid of ICE in general, because they can come hurt us,’” she said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mayren is telling parents to be patient with children, try to protect them from the news and maintain routines, especially if kids have been pulled out of school. She also encourages parents to find mental health assistance to try to keep kids stable, with the caveat that they may not see much improvement in their kids’ mental health while immigration enforcement remains so aggressive and visible.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We’re just keeping children’s heads above water now because they’re in a state of emergency,” she said. “It’s just survival.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>This story about immigration raids was produced by The Hechinger Report, a nonprofit, independent news organization focused on inequality and innovation in education. Sign up for the \u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/earlychildhood\">newsletter here\u003c/a>. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cp>For decades, economists could rely on a comforting graph about happiness over a lifetime: It followed a U-shape, like a smile. Young people were carefree and happy. Middle age was rough but joy returned again in old age. This wasn’t a flimsy finding. More than 600 academic papers, published from 1980 to 2020, documented this up-down-up trend in human psychology across 145 countries.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Classic example of a happiness U-curve from the U.K.\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_66083\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 512px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-66083\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/01/U-Curve.png\" alt=\"A graph showing a steep U shaped curve compared to a more flat U shaped curve. \" width=\"512\" height=\"364\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/01/U-Curve.png 512w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/01/U-Curve-160x114.png 160w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 512px) 100vw, 512px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Life satisfaction at different ages in the UK, 2011-2015 (416,000 observations) Source: Andrew Oswald and David Blanchflower, 2017. https://cepr.org/voxeu/columns/midlife-low-human-beings\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Then, during the pandemic, many people noticed that the young weren’t so happy anymore. There was a surge of youth mental illness, especially anxiety and depression. The U-shaped smile was fast disappearing globally and shifting into a sneer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>David Blanchflower, a prominent British-American labor economist at Dartmouth College, has been studying this decline in youth well-being and trying to understand it. Based on large surveys of mental health, he dates the start of the deterioration in the U.S. and the U.K. to around 2013, seven years before the Covid pandemic and the isolation of lockdowns.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“That’s when smartphones came along,” said Blanchflower.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Social media would seem a logical culprit for the rise in misery. Smartphones had just become ubiquitous around that time, and critics like social psychologist Jonathan Haidt have argued that they’ve been rewiring adolescent brains for the worse.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But when Blanchflower dug into the data, the smartphone story provided only a partial explanation. If social media were the main driver, you’d expect misery to rise among all young people at roughly the same rate. And while it’s true that ill-being increased among all young adults, Blanchflower discovered that the decline in well-being was concentrated among those young adults who were working, especially females under 25. College students and others not working still showed something close to the old happiness curve, even if the left corner wasn’t quite as upturned.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That raises a puzzling question: Why are young \u003cem>workers\u003c/em> so unhappy?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They’re not having trouble getting a job. Employment rates for 16- to 24-year-olds have risen since 2010. Their hours have increased. Their relative wages have also risen. Blanchflower analyzed decades of U.S. survey data on mental health and linked it to employment outcomes. His analysis appeared in a \u003ca href=\"https://www.nber.org/system/files/working_papers/w34696/w34696.pdf\">working paper\u003c/a>, not yet published in a peer-reviewed journal, but circulated by the National Bureau of Economic Research in January 2026.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This data shows that the rise in ill-being and fall in well-being are especially large for the youngest workers aged 18-22 over the last decade. And it confirms that non-workers this age, namely college students, aren’t as miserable. They’re still relatively happy. This diverging pattern was true for the U.S. as a whole and in all 50 states between 2020 and 2025. What’s particularly new, according to Blanchflower, is the sharp increase in despair and misery among young workers. He created this chart for me.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-66082\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/01/Despair-and-U-curve.png\" alt=\"A graph showing a gradual rise over time of despair\" width=\"360\" height=\"217\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/01/Despair-and-U-curve.png 360w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/01/Despair-and-U-curve-160x96.png 160w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 360px) 100vw, 360px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despair is also sharply stratified by education: High school dropouts fare far worse than college graduates, even those of the same age.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But back to why. Blanchflower notes that job satisfaction among the young has fallen. A Conference Board survey shows a persistent gap between younger and older workers. In 2025, job satisfaction was 72 percent among workers aged 55 and over and just 57 percent among those aged 18 to 24. Across multiple dimensions, young workers rate their jobs as lower quality than older workers do, and report greater difficulty with job stability and making ends meet.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One interpretation is that young people increasingly have what anthropologist David Graeber memorably called “bullshit jobs” — work that feels pointless, insecure and disconnected from any sense of purpose. There’s no direct proof of that, but other researchers have argued that young workers have borne the brunt of gig work, declining bargaining power, and vanishing career ladders. Fears of being replaced by AI are also strongest among the young.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Previous generations also often landed boring first jobs and worried about financial security. But expectations for work may have changed for members of Gen Z. Since around 2012, the share of young people who say they expect their chosen work to be “extremely satisfying” has fallen from about 40 percent to closer to 20 percent. If work is no longer expected to deliver meaning or identity, its psychological payoff may be lower.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Another theory is that the mental health of today’s young workers began deteriorating when they were still in high school. That damage carried into adulthood, making the transition from school to work harder — especially for those without college credentials.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The youngest workers, especially those without any college, are hardest hit, and we don’t know why,” Blanchflower concludes in his paper.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Blanchflower’s study is a warning that something fundamental has gone wrong as young people enter the workforce. Policymakers need to keep this in mind as they create more pathways to good jobs that don’t require college.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>This story about young adult \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/young-adult-misery/\">\u003cem>misery\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem> was produced by \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/special-reports/higher-education/\">The Hechinger Report\u003c/a>\u003cem>, a nonprofit, independent news organization focused on inequality and innovation in education. Sign up for \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/proofpoints/\">\u003cem>Proof Points\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem> and other \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/newsletters/\">\u003cem>Hechinger newsletters\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>For decades, economists could rely on a comforting graph about happiness over a lifetime: It followed a U-shape, like a smile. Young people were carefree and happy. Middle age was rough but joy returned again in old age. This wasn’t a flimsy finding. More than 600 academic papers, published from 1980 to 2020, documented this up-down-up trend in human psychology across 145 countries.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Classic example of a happiness U-curve from the U.K.\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_66083\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 512px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-66083\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/01/U-Curve.png\" alt=\"A graph showing a steep U shaped curve compared to a more flat U shaped curve. \" width=\"512\" height=\"364\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/01/U-Curve.png 512w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/01/U-Curve-160x114.png 160w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 512px) 100vw, 512px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Life satisfaction at different ages in the UK, 2011-2015 (416,000 observations) Source: Andrew Oswald and David Blanchflower, 2017. https://cepr.org/voxeu/columns/midlife-low-human-beings\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Then, during the pandemic, many people noticed that the young weren’t so happy anymore. There was a surge of youth mental illness, especially anxiety and depression. The U-shaped smile was fast disappearing globally and shifting into a sneer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>David Blanchflower, a prominent British-American labor economist at Dartmouth College, has been studying this decline in youth well-being and trying to understand it. Based on large surveys of mental health, he dates the start of the deterioration in the U.S. and the U.K. to around 2013, seven years before the Covid pandemic and the isolation of lockdowns.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“That’s when smartphones came along,” said Blanchflower.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Social media would seem a logical culprit for the rise in misery. Smartphones had just become ubiquitous around that time, and critics like social psychologist Jonathan Haidt have argued that they’ve been rewiring adolescent brains for the worse.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But when Blanchflower dug into the data, the smartphone story provided only a partial explanation. If social media were the main driver, you’d expect misery to rise among all young people at roughly the same rate. And while it’s true that ill-being increased among all young adults, Blanchflower discovered that the decline in well-being was concentrated among those young adults who were working, especially females under 25. College students and others not working still showed something close to the old happiness curve, even if the left corner wasn’t quite as upturned.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That raises a puzzling question: Why are young \u003cem>workers\u003c/em> so unhappy?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They’re not having trouble getting a job. Employment rates for 16- to 24-year-olds have risen since 2010. Their hours have increased. Their relative wages have also risen. Blanchflower analyzed decades of U.S. survey data on mental health and linked it to employment outcomes. His analysis appeared in a \u003ca href=\"https://www.nber.org/system/files/working_papers/w34696/w34696.pdf\">working paper\u003c/a>, not yet published in a peer-reviewed journal, but circulated by the National Bureau of Economic Research in January 2026.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This data shows that the rise in ill-being and fall in well-being are especially large for the youngest workers aged 18-22 over the last decade. And it confirms that non-workers this age, namely college students, aren’t as miserable. They’re still relatively happy. This diverging pattern was true for the U.S. as a whole and in all 50 states between 2020 and 2025. What’s particularly new, according to Blanchflower, is the sharp increase in despair and misery among young workers. He created this chart for me.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-66082\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/01/Despair-and-U-curve.png\" alt=\"A graph showing a gradual rise over time of despair\" width=\"360\" height=\"217\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/01/Despair-and-U-curve.png 360w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2026/01/Despair-and-U-curve-160x96.png 160w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 360px) 100vw, 360px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despair is also sharply stratified by education: High school dropouts fare far worse than college graduates, even those of the same age.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But back to why. Blanchflower notes that job satisfaction among the young has fallen. A Conference Board survey shows a persistent gap between younger and older workers. In 2025, job satisfaction was 72 percent among workers aged 55 and over and just 57 percent among those aged 18 to 24. Across multiple dimensions, young workers rate their jobs as lower quality than older workers do, and report greater difficulty with job stability and making ends meet.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One interpretation is that young people increasingly have what anthropologist David Graeber memorably called “bullshit jobs” — work that feels pointless, insecure and disconnected from any sense of purpose. There’s no direct proof of that, but other researchers have argued that young workers have borne the brunt of gig work, declining bargaining power, and vanishing career ladders. Fears of being replaced by AI are also strongest among the young.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Previous generations also often landed boring first jobs and worried about financial security. But expectations for work may have changed for members of Gen Z. Since around 2012, the share of young people who say they expect their chosen work to be “extremely satisfying” has fallen from about 40 percent to closer to 20 percent. If work is no longer expected to deliver meaning or identity, its psychological payoff may be lower.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Another theory is that the mental health of today’s young workers began deteriorating when they were still in high school. That damage carried into adulthood, making the transition from school to work harder — especially for those without college credentials.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The youngest workers, especially those without any college, are hardest hit, and we don’t know why,” Blanchflower concludes in his paper.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Blanchflower’s study is a warning that something fundamental has gone wrong as young people enter the workforce. Policymakers need to keep this in mind as they create more pathways to good jobs that don’t require college.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>This story about young adult \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/young-adult-misery/\">\u003cem>misery\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem> was produced by \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/special-reports/higher-education/\">The Hechinger Report\u003c/a>\u003cem>, a nonprofit, independent news organization focused on inequality and innovation in education. Sign up for \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/proofpoints/\">\u003cem>Proof Points\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem> and other \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/newsletters/\">\u003cem>Hechinger newsletters\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cp>Have you ever felt so anxious in a tough situation that you didn’t know what to do next? That’s how Seth Kopald felt during his divorce. He worried that he’d lose connection with his kids.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“How much time will I have with them?” he recalls thinking. Would they be OK, he wondered. One night, as he was driving home, he struggled to catch his breath as panic took over. He pulled over to the side of the road, recognizing he needed help.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>His therapist turned him onto an approach he’d never heard of called \u003ca href=\"https://ifs-institute.com/\">Internal Family Systems, \u003c/a>or IFS, and recommended a book to get him started, written by its founder Richard Schwartz. “It was life-changing,” Kopald says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the center of IFS — sometimes called “parts work” — is the idea that each of us has multiple parts, kind of like sub-personalities. Getting to know them and treating them with compassion may help us manage our lives and our stress better, Schwartz writes in his book \u003ca href=\"https://ifs-institute.com/nobadparts\">\u003cem>No Bad Parts\u003c/em>\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-embed npr-promo-card insettwocolumn\">\n\u003cdiv class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\u003c/div>\n\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Schwartz came up with the idea for IFS more than 40 years ago when he was a family therapist treating adolescents with bulimia. His patients told him about different parts of themselves that were interfering with their treatment, like “the critic” who would make them feel worthless and alone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As the scientist in him mulled this over, he also looked inward. “I noticed them in myself. Oh my God, I’ve got them too,” he recalls.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The premise of the IFS model is that our minds are not one-dimensional. “We’re all multiple,” Schwartz says. We all have multiple perspectives within — for example, people often identify an inner critic, worrier, or striver. And some parts tend to dominate our lives, while others are more hidden. IFS teaches a process to embrace all your parts, bring them into balance and find a sense of wholeness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Parts work has exploded in popularity recently — with a growing number of books, apps and social media accounts highlighting the system. There are now \u003ca href=\"https://ifs-institute.com/practitioners\">more than 6,000\u003c/a> IFS-certified therapists and practitioners.\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>IFS is used by therapists working on a range of issues, from couples therapy, to coping with the death of a loved one, or other traumas.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some therapists say the popularity has gotten ahead of the evidence base and are \u003ca href=\"https://societyforpsychotherapy.org/internal-family-systems-exploring-its-problematic-popularity/#:~:text=We%20have%20noticed%20increasing%20numbers,well%20as%20trauma%2Dinformed%20psychotherapy.\">calling for more research\u003c/a>. There are several small studies showing IFS can benefit people with specific problems, including symptoms of \u003ca href=\"https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/10926771.2021.2013375#abstract\">PTSD\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/38934934/\">stress\u003c/a>; the pain, discomfort and depression from living with \u003ca href=\"https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/23950186/\">rheumatoid arthritis\u003c/a>; and \u003ca href=\"https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/27500908/\">depression\u003c/a>. And more studies are underway.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For Seth Kopald, parts work was key to taming his anxiety, as he began to recognize that it stemmed from fears of feeling unloved in childhood.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>With IFS, he could now acknowledge the hurt child within, and begin to unburden from the pain and shame.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“There’s a big difference between, ‘I am the anxiety and fear versus I am here with the fear, I’m here with the anxiety,’” he says. And in that realization his natural state of “confidence, courage and compassion” resurfaced. “It’s almost like I have a new operating system now,” Kopald says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So, if you’re dealing with stress — around relationships, tragedy, or any life challenge — you may want to learn more about parts work. Here are highlights of how the IFS process works.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2F92%2Fa2%2Fc0f4a4e4427d82e7cdaf6b680957%2Fweek5-digital-spot-movies-in-mind.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>1. Quiet your mind and look within\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>One way to begin to get to know your parts is to listen.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sit still, as if you were about to meditate and notice any bodily sensations that arise. Do you feel a sore neck, a tight chest, sick to your stomach? Do you see scenes or images from the past? What comes up first are parts that may need your attention. Focus on one sensation or image — tune in and ask it what it wants you to know.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When Seth Kopald tried this, he sensed a nervousness throughout his body and he saw images from old movies in his mind — scenes of bad divorces, couples fighting over kids. He was getting in touch with a worrier part that was dominating his life at the time.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>2. Start a dialogue with your parts\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>In IFS, the rule is that none of our parts are bad. Each of them can give us useful information.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Kopald started to realize that his worry and anxiety were what IFS calls “protector” parts, which help us get through tough situations. “They were trying to make me do something — to figure out a solution to help my kids,” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But these parts were causing so much anxiety, he was stuck.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The worrier was telling him “do something.” Then there was a critic questioning what he’d done to contribute to the bad situation. And another part was jumping in to try to numb him from the pain.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>These multiple parts were teaming up, a pattern that can happen to many of us in moments of crisis. It’s like noisy instruments playing out of tune, Kopald says, citing a metaphor frequently used in IFS.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you find yourself overwhelmed by a cacophony, try to start a dialogue with your parts: What do you want me to know? What do you want to show me?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And the more you learn to work with your parts, you can start to become the leader, or the conductor, Kopald says, bringing up each instrument in harmony\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fcd%2F82%2F16121c7449f094153ce0d4852e7f%2Fweek5-digital-spot-conductor.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>3. Take some space\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>IFS teaches you to “separate” from the noise of these competing parts. Kopald recalls the moment he started to get some perspective on his anxiety about his kids, by seeing it as just one part.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“When it really hit me that the anxiety I’d been feeling was one aspect of me, but not \u003cem>all\u003c/em> of me, I felt this calm come over me,” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This was the beginning of a breakthrough for him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you want to try this, ask your noisy part: “Can you give me some space so we can talk?” For Kopald, instead of feeling like he was that scared, anxious kid, he got to the place where he felt he was sitting with that kid, helping to comfort him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2Ff3%2F51%2F2c514830489294344a2c2ecd1dd8%2Fweek2-digital-spot-honoring-pain.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>4. Get in touch with pain from childhood\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>IFS teaches that we all have \u003cem>exile \u003c/em>parts, which hold onto hurtful memories, many from childhood. Since it’s easier to bury negative feelings than deal with them, these exiles — as the name suggests — can stay locked deep within.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>IFS founder Dick Schwartz says the exile parts can get triggered in times of difficulty. But he says, “these are often our most sensitive and loving parts.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As a kid, Schwartz struggled in school, which frustrated his father — a prominent physician and researcher. “So he piled on a lot of shame,” Schwartz says. He could recall his father saying things like, “Dicky, you’re good for nothing,” and the hurt was buried deep within.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He allowed himself to relive those experiences from childhood. “I could actually enter that scene and be with” the hurt boy, Schwartz says. In doing so he could feel the mistrust and fear and shame lifting, what IFS calls “an unburdening.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For Schwartz this opened up a playful inner child. “That was lacking in my life back before I actually unburdened that part,” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This part can be tricky to do alone. Exiles will sometimes take you back to painful scenes, and show you traumatic memories. Kopald says if you feel the pain of an exile arise, you can say: “I know you’re there – I’m not pushing you away.” You can ask it to share its story, and if this gets too intense, you may want to contact an IFS therapist.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2F26%2F0e%2F50da6c1f4194ad1e1244d14d5c49%2Fweek5-digital-spot-u-turn.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>5. Take a U-turn\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>Kopald says his life is much better now. He has a loving relationship with his children and he’s remarried. Now an IFS-certified practitioner, he’s written a book on IFS, \u003ca href=\"https://www.amazon.com/Self-Led-Connected-Yourself-Application-Internal/dp/B0CNV4V3HL\">\u003cem>Self-Led: Living a Connected Life With Yourself and With Others.\u003c/em>\u003c/a> But, he still has moments when life is very stressful or throws too much at him. When this happens, he uses a technique called a U-Turn. The U-turn is an exercise to gain perspective.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you find yourself engaging in negative self-talk — or you are feeling like everything is falling apart, take a moment to notice what’s happening inside, look inward. Kopald says he’ll ask himself: “Wait a minute, who’s taking me over right now?”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In other words, you observe which part inside you is triggering your anxiety, fear or negativity. And then you can tell it, “Hey, I got it. Can you just trust me to be here?” Kopald says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2F6c%2Fcd%2F9dad3d6c48f4a56a391e9e70ed9d%2Fweek5-digital-spot-sunshine-ray.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>6. Uncover the light within\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>When you’re no longer dominated by the cacophony of parts, then your true self can emerge, according to IFS.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In IFS, Self is the parent or leader of your system, offering love and protection to all your parts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Seth says you can think of Self as the sun, which is often covered by clouds, i.e., your parts. Remember the sun is always in its full power, even on a cloudy day. So Kopald says, like clouds parting, we can “remove the things that block our light.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For Kopald, this has made a big difference. “I tend to live more in the light of myself,” he says. And he feels more clarity, compassion, creativity and calm.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Stress Less editors are Carmel Wroth and Jane Greenhalgh\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Have you ever felt so anxious in a tough situation that you didn’t know what to do next? That’s how Seth Kopald felt during his divorce. He worried that he’d lose connection with his kids.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“How much time will I have with them?” he recalls thinking. Would they be OK, he wondered. One night, as he was driving home, he struggled to catch his breath as panic took over. He pulled over to the side of the road, recognizing he needed help.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>His therapist turned him onto an approach he’d never heard of called \u003ca href=\"https://ifs-institute.com/\">Internal Family Systems, \u003c/a>or IFS, and recommended a book to get him started, written by its founder Richard Schwartz. “It was life-changing,” Kopald says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the center of IFS — sometimes called “parts work” — is the idea that each of us has multiple parts, kind of like sub-personalities. Getting to know them and treating them with compassion may help us manage our lives and our stress better, Schwartz writes in his book \u003ca href=\"https://ifs-institute.com/nobadparts\">\u003cem>No Bad Parts\u003c/em>\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-embed npr-promo-card insettwocolumn\">\n\u003cdiv class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\u003c/div>\n\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Schwartz came up with the idea for IFS more than 40 years ago when he was a family therapist treating adolescents with bulimia. His patients told him about different parts of themselves that were interfering with their treatment, like “the critic” who would make them feel worthless and alone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As the scientist in him mulled this over, he also looked inward. “I noticed them in myself. Oh my God, I’ve got them too,” he recalls.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The premise of the IFS model is that our minds are not one-dimensional. “We’re all multiple,” Schwartz says. We all have multiple perspectives within — for example, people often identify an inner critic, worrier, or striver. And some parts tend to dominate our lives, while others are more hidden. IFS teaches a process to embrace all your parts, bring them into balance and find a sense of wholeness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Parts work has exploded in popularity recently — with a growing number of books, apps and social media accounts highlighting the system. There are now \u003ca href=\"https://ifs-institute.com/practitioners\">more than 6,000\u003c/a> IFS-certified therapists and practitioners.\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>IFS is used by therapists working on a range of issues, from couples therapy, to coping with the death of a loved one, or other traumas.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some therapists say the popularity has gotten ahead of the evidence base and are \u003ca href=\"https://societyforpsychotherapy.org/internal-family-systems-exploring-its-problematic-popularity/#:~:text=We%20have%20noticed%20increasing%20numbers,well%20as%20trauma%2Dinformed%20psychotherapy.\">calling for more research\u003c/a>. There are several small studies showing IFS can benefit people with specific problems, including symptoms of \u003ca href=\"https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/10926771.2021.2013375#abstract\">PTSD\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/38934934/\">stress\u003c/a>; the pain, discomfort and depression from living with \u003ca href=\"https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/23950186/\">rheumatoid arthritis\u003c/a>; and \u003ca href=\"https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/27500908/\">depression\u003c/a>. And more studies are underway.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For Seth Kopald, parts work was key to taming his anxiety, as he began to recognize that it stemmed from fears of feeling unloved in childhood.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>With IFS, he could now acknowledge the hurt child within, and begin to unburden from the pain and shame.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“There’s a big difference between, ‘I am the anxiety and fear versus I am here with the fear, I’m here with the anxiety,’” he says. And in that realization his natural state of “confidence, courage and compassion” resurfaced. “It’s almost like I have a new operating system now,” Kopald says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So, if you’re dealing with stress — around relationships, tragedy, or any life challenge — you may want to learn more about parts work. Here are highlights of how the IFS process works.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2F92%2Fa2%2Fc0f4a4e4427d82e7cdaf6b680957%2Fweek5-digital-spot-movies-in-mind.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>1. Quiet your mind and look within\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>One way to begin to get to know your parts is to listen.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sit still, as if you were about to meditate and notice any bodily sensations that arise. Do you feel a sore neck, a tight chest, sick to your stomach? Do you see scenes or images from the past? What comes up first are parts that may need your attention. Focus on one sensation or image — tune in and ask it what it wants you to know.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When Seth Kopald tried this, he sensed a nervousness throughout his body and he saw images from old movies in his mind — scenes of bad divorces, couples fighting over kids. He was getting in touch with a worrier part that was dominating his life at the time.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>2. Start a dialogue with your parts\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>In IFS, the rule is that none of our parts are bad. Each of them can give us useful information.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Kopald started to realize that his worry and anxiety were what IFS calls “protector” parts, which help us get through tough situations. “They were trying to make me do something — to figure out a solution to help my kids,” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But these parts were causing so much anxiety, he was stuck.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The worrier was telling him “do something.” Then there was a critic questioning what he’d done to contribute to the bad situation. And another part was jumping in to try to numb him from the pain.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>These multiple parts were teaming up, a pattern that can happen to many of us in moments of crisis. It’s like noisy instruments playing out of tune, Kopald says, citing a metaphor frequently used in IFS.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you find yourself overwhelmed by a cacophony, try to start a dialogue with your parts: What do you want me to know? What do you want to show me?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And the more you learn to work with your parts, you can start to become the leader, or the conductor, Kopald says, bringing up each instrument in harmony\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fcd%2F82%2F16121c7449f094153ce0d4852e7f%2Fweek5-digital-spot-conductor.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>3. Take some space\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>IFS teaches you to “separate” from the noise of these competing parts. Kopald recalls the moment he started to get some perspective on his anxiety about his kids, by seeing it as just one part.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“When it really hit me that the anxiety I’d been feeling was one aspect of me, but not \u003cem>all\u003c/em> of me, I felt this calm come over me,” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This was the beginning of a breakthrough for him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you want to try this, ask your noisy part: “Can you give me some space so we can talk?” For Kopald, instead of feeling like he was that scared, anxious kid, he got to the place where he felt he was sitting with that kid, helping to comfort him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2Ff3%2F51%2F2c514830489294344a2c2ecd1dd8%2Fweek2-digital-spot-honoring-pain.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>4. Get in touch with pain from childhood\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>IFS teaches that we all have \u003cem>exile \u003c/em>parts, which hold onto hurtful memories, many from childhood. Since it’s easier to bury negative feelings than deal with them, these exiles — as the name suggests — can stay locked deep within.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>IFS founder Dick Schwartz says the exile parts can get triggered in times of difficulty. But he says, “these are often our most sensitive and loving parts.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As a kid, Schwartz struggled in school, which frustrated his father — a prominent physician and researcher. “So he piled on a lot of shame,” Schwartz says. He could recall his father saying things like, “Dicky, you’re good for nothing,” and the hurt was buried deep within.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He allowed himself to relive those experiences from childhood. “I could actually enter that scene and be with” the hurt boy, Schwartz says. In doing so he could feel the mistrust and fear and shame lifting, what IFS calls “an unburdening.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For Schwartz this opened up a playful inner child. “That was lacking in my life back before I actually unburdened that part,” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This part can be tricky to do alone. Exiles will sometimes take you back to painful scenes, and show you traumatic memories. Kopald says if you feel the pain of an exile arise, you can say: “I know you’re there – I’m not pushing you away.” You can ask it to share its story, and if this gets too intense, you may want to contact an IFS therapist.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2F26%2F0e%2F50da6c1f4194ad1e1244d14d5c49%2Fweek5-digital-spot-u-turn.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>5. Take a U-turn\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>Kopald says his life is much better now. He has a loving relationship with his children and he’s remarried. Now an IFS-certified practitioner, he’s written a book on IFS, \u003ca href=\"https://www.amazon.com/Self-Led-Connected-Yourself-Application-Internal/dp/B0CNV4V3HL\">\u003cem>Self-Led: Living a Connected Life With Yourself and With Others.\u003c/em>\u003c/a> But, he still has moments when life is very stressful or throws too much at him. When this happens, he uses a technique called a U-Turn. The U-turn is an exercise to gain perspective.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you find yourself engaging in negative self-talk — or you are feeling like everything is falling apart, take a moment to notice what’s happening inside, look inward. Kopald says he’ll ask himself: “Wait a minute, who’s taking me over right now?”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In other words, you observe which part inside you is triggering your anxiety, fear or negativity. And then you can tell it, “Hey, I got it. Can you just trust me to be here?” Kopald says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2F6c%2Fcd%2F9dad3d6c48f4a56a391e9e70ed9d%2Fweek5-digital-spot-sunshine-ray.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>6. Uncover the light within\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>When you’re no longer dominated by the cacophony of parts, then your true self can emerge, according to IFS.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In IFS, Self is the parent or leader of your system, offering love and protection to all your parts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Seth says you can think of Self as the sun, which is often covered by clouds, i.e., your parts. Remember the sun is always in its full power, even on a cloudy day. So Kopald says, like clouds parting, we can “remove the things that block our light.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For Kopald, this has made a big difference. “I tend to live more in the light of myself,” he says. And he feels more clarity, compassion, creativity and calm.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cp>No one gets a free pass when it comes to stress. We all experience it, and though chronic stress can take its toll on our health, there are situations when stress can be beneficial.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ever felt clammy palms or butterflies in your stomach? In the moments before you walk into a job interview, ask someone out on a date, or step up to a podium to speak to a crowd, your stress response can kick in and create these physical sensations.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dan Harris, host of the podcast \u003ca href=\"https://www.danharris.com/\">10% Happier,\u003c/a> recalls a case of the jitters before a recent TV appearance. He felt his heart rate pick up. “In the seconds before I went on I was pacing around,” he says, feeling nervous.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And the outcome? “The appearance went great.” Harris says he’s come to interpret some of the physiological aspects of stress as a good thing. “There’s an empowering inner jujitsu move,” he says, to reframe stress.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Instead of telling yourself that you’re having crippling anxiety, you can tell yourself a more empowering story, which is, I’m excited!” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-embed npr-promo-card insettwocolumn\">\n\u003cdiv class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\u003c/div>\n\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Your stress response can be your body’s way of preparing to rise to a challenge, explains \u003ca href=\"https://www.sas.rochester.edu/psy/people/faculty/jamieson_jeremy/\">Jeremy Jamieson\u003c/a>, a psychologist at the University of Rochester. He studies how stress responses can be “optimized.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We’re not passive receivers of stress,” Jamieson explains. “We’re active agents in actually making our own stress response.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamieson says the stress we feel during challenging situations can give us fuel to address the demands we face. For instance, as your heart rate increases, it can help deliver more oxygen to your brain and muscles.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Oxygen is very good for helping us process information quickly,” Jamieson explains. It can also help people perform.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Humans have long faced threats from predators, and our fight-or-flight response evolved to help us survive these dangers. But the kinds of stressors we face today have shifted. In modern times, some of our stress comes from challenges that Jamieson says can be viewed as “growth opportunities.” The job interview, the presentation, the TV appearance.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“To really innovate and do hard things, your stress response is there to optimize your performance,” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When it comes to stress, “context matters,” says researcher \u003ca href=\"https://psychology.yale.edu/people/wendy-berry-mendes\">Wendy Berry Mendes\u003c/a>, a professor of psychology at Yale University. There are different types of stress responses and different types of stress.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She points to studies from Scandinavia, going back decades, that found stress hormones are linked to \u003ca href=\"https://digitalcommons.unl.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1215&context=psychfacpub\">better performance\u003c/a> in students taking tests.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“A greater increase \u003ca href=\"https://www.cancer.gov/publications/dictionaries/cancer-terms/def/catecholamine\">in catecholamines\u003c/a>, [including] epinephrine, norepinephrine, the morning of the test was associated with better performance on that test,” she says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But here’s the challenge: Not everyone responds to stressors in the same way. Test anxiety is real for some people and it can work against their performance. Part of the equation is how well they know the material, or how well prepared they are to take the test. Another part is how they perceive stress.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamieson points to evidence that people can be taught to \u003ca href=\"https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2021-65684-001\">“reappraise” stress.\u003c/a> He and collaborators studied community college students who were preparing for a math test. When students were given information about the “functional benefits” of stress before the test, they did better.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“By informing people of the benefits of stress responses in these settings, they latched on to the idea, I can lean into my stress, “ Jamieson says, and use it to help do important things.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The students who were taught to “reappraise their stress as a resource,” not only performed better they had less text anxiety.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>When good stress turns bad\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>So, when stress arises from a challenge or opportunity, it can be helpful in the moment. But, when your stress response stays activated during times you don’t need it, this becomes problematic.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let’s say you have a big presentation, that’s still three days away. You’ve finished the preparations, but anticipatory stress sets in. Just imagining yourself giving the presentation gives you jitters. You can feel a stress response amp up.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Your breath is shallow, or you feel edgy or irritated. If you use a wearable, such as an Oura ring or Apple Watch, it may show a low level of heart rate variability, which is indicative of more time in stress mode.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Your body is going into overdrive before you need it,” Mendes says. And this can exhaust your physiological system. “Imagine if you were sprinting across the savannah, trying to run away from a lion,” Mendes says, but the lion isn’t showing up for three days! That isn’t sustainable.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It’s also unhelpful to fret about a performance after it’s over. “Your body no longer needs to be in overdrive,” Mendes says, but worrying keeps the stress response activated.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This can lead to fatigue, moodiness and burnout. Chronic stress can make you feel as if you’re continually under attack. It’s linked to everything from an \u003ca href=\"https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/stress/art-20046037#:~:text=When%20you%20face%20a%20perceived,hormones%20return%20to%20typical%20levels.\">increased risk\u003c/a> in heart disease to depression, headaches and sleep troubles.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>All of this suggests that strategies to manage stress are key. We can’t avoid the tough situations life throws at us, but we can learn skills that boost our ability to manage and even bounce back and thrive.\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>To learn more about ways to manage stress, join NPR’s \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/series/g-s1-24355/stress-less\">Stress Less: A quest to reclaim your calm.\u003c/a> And get five weekly newsletters full of tips and strategies to manage stress and boost positive emotions: \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/newsletter/stress-less\">\u003cem>Sign up here.\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003c/div>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Stress Less editors are Carmel Wroth and Jane Greenhalgh\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>No one gets a free pass when it comes to stress. We all experience it, and though chronic stress can take its toll on our health, there are situations when stress can be beneficial.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ever felt clammy palms or butterflies in your stomach? In the moments before you walk into a job interview, ask someone out on a date, or step up to a podium to speak to a crowd, your stress response can kick in and create these physical sensations.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dan Harris, host of the podcast \u003ca href=\"https://www.danharris.com/\">10% Happier,\u003c/a> recalls a case of the jitters before a recent TV appearance. He felt his heart rate pick up. “In the seconds before I went on I was pacing around,” he says, feeling nervous.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And the outcome? “The appearance went great.” Harris says he’s come to interpret some of the physiological aspects of stress as a good thing. “There’s an empowering inner jujitsu move,” he says, to reframe stress.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Instead of telling yourself that you’re having crippling anxiety, you can tell yourself a more empowering story, which is, I’m excited!” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-embed npr-promo-card insettwocolumn\">\n\u003cdiv class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\u003c/div>\n\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Your stress response can be your body’s way of preparing to rise to a challenge, explains \u003ca href=\"https://www.sas.rochester.edu/psy/people/faculty/jamieson_jeremy/\">Jeremy Jamieson\u003c/a>, a psychologist at the University of Rochester. He studies how stress responses can be “optimized.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We’re not passive receivers of stress,” Jamieson explains. “We’re active agents in actually making our own stress response.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamieson says the stress we feel during challenging situations can give us fuel to address the demands we face. For instance, as your heart rate increases, it can help deliver more oxygen to your brain and muscles.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Oxygen is very good for helping us process information quickly,” Jamieson explains. It can also help people perform.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Humans have long faced threats from predators, and our fight-or-flight response evolved to help us survive these dangers. But the kinds of stressors we face today have shifted. In modern times, some of our stress comes from challenges that Jamieson says can be viewed as “growth opportunities.” The job interview, the presentation, the TV appearance.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“To really innovate and do hard things, your stress response is there to optimize your performance,” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When it comes to stress, “context matters,” says researcher \u003ca href=\"https://psychology.yale.edu/people/wendy-berry-mendes\">Wendy Berry Mendes\u003c/a>, a professor of psychology at Yale University. There are different types of stress responses and different types of stress.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She points to studies from Scandinavia, going back decades, that found stress hormones are linked to \u003ca href=\"https://digitalcommons.unl.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1215&context=psychfacpub\">better performance\u003c/a> in students taking tests.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“A greater increase \u003ca href=\"https://www.cancer.gov/publications/dictionaries/cancer-terms/def/catecholamine\">in catecholamines\u003c/a>, [including] epinephrine, norepinephrine, the morning of the test was associated with better performance on that test,” she says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But here’s the challenge: Not everyone responds to stressors in the same way. Test anxiety is real for some people and it can work against their performance. Part of the equation is how well they know the material, or how well prepared they are to take the test. Another part is how they perceive stress.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamieson points to evidence that people can be taught to \u003ca href=\"https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2021-65684-001\">“reappraise” stress.\u003c/a> He and collaborators studied community college students who were preparing for a math test. When students were given information about the “functional benefits” of stress before the test, they did better.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“By informing people of the benefits of stress responses in these settings, they latched on to the idea, I can lean into my stress, “ Jamieson says, and use it to help do important things.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The students who were taught to “reappraise their stress as a resource,” not only performed better they had less text anxiety.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>When good stress turns bad\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>So, when stress arises from a challenge or opportunity, it can be helpful in the moment. But, when your stress response stays activated during times you don’t need it, this becomes problematic.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let’s say you have a big presentation, that’s still three days away. You’ve finished the preparations, but anticipatory stress sets in. Just imagining yourself giving the presentation gives you jitters. You can feel a stress response amp up.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Your breath is shallow, or you feel edgy or irritated. If you use a wearable, such as an Oura ring or Apple Watch, it may show a low level of heart rate variability, which is indicative of more time in stress mode.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Your body is going into overdrive before you need it,” Mendes says. And this can exhaust your physiological system. “Imagine if you were sprinting across the savannah, trying to run away from a lion,” Mendes says, but the lion isn’t showing up for three days! That isn’t sustainable.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It’s also unhelpful to fret about a performance after it’s over. “Your body no longer needs to be in overdrive,” Mendes says, but worrying keeps the stress response activated.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This can lead to fatigue, moodiness and burnout. Chronic stress can make you feel as if you’re continually under attack. It’s linked to everything from an \u003ca href=\"https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/stress/art-20046037#:~:text=When%20you%20face%20a%20perceived,hormones%20return%20to%20typical%20levels.\">increased risk\u003c/a> in heart disease to depression, headaches and sleep troubles.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>All of this suggests that strategies to manage stress are key. We can’t avoid the tough situations life throws at us, but we can learn skills that boost our ability to manage and even bounce back and thrive.\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>To learn more about ways to manage stress, join NPR’s \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/series/g-s1-24355/stress-less\">Stress Less: A quest to reclaim your calm.\u003c/a> And get five weekly newsletters full of tips and strategies to manage stress and boost positive emotions: \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/newsletter/stress-less\">\u003cem>Sign up here.\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003c/div>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Stress Less editors are Carmel Wroth and Jane Greenhalgh\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"title": "The Benefits of Raising Hopeful Kids in Cynical Times",
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"content": "\u003cp>In the face of uncertainty, parents often seek to protect children by warning them about the world’s threats and dangers. But is this the right approach?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamil Zaki is the director of the Stanford Social Neuroscience Lab and author of the new book “\u003ca href=\"https://www.amazon.com/Hope-Cynics-Surprising-Science-Goodness/dp/153874306X/\">Hope for Cynics: The Surprising Science of Human Goodness\u003c/a>.” In an interview with MindShift, Zaki said that when adults “try to keep our kids safe by making them feel unsafe,” they fuel a cynicism that can have unintended consequences for children’s mental and emotional well-being.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“If we focus kids on the negative – on the worst parts of life and the worst parts of humanity – we’re going to end up shrinking their world, making it harder for them to trust, and making it harder for them to explore, take risks, and form relationships.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That doesn’t mean adults should abandon safety protocols. Zaki is the father to two young daughters. When they complain about putting on sunscreen or buckling their seat belt, he asks them, “What’s my most important job?” And they respond, “To keep us safe.” That’s a fundamental parental responsibility.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But the more nuanced question is this, Zaki said: “What are we depriving our children of in the name of safety?” Emphasizing a hopeful mindset over a cynical one, Zaki argues, is an empirically wiser parenting choice.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cstrong>Defining Hope\u003c/strong>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>Let’s first define some terms. Zaki described optimism as a belief that the world \u003cem>will be\u003c/em> better and cynicism as the belief that it \u003cem>will never be \u003c/em>better. But hope, he said, is the conviction that the world \u003cem>can be\u003c/em> better. Under this framework, hope is empowering because it requires action and allows for agency. The future “can be better,” because humans can do something to make it so.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Zaki put it this way, “Optimism is us telling our kids, \u003cem>don’t worry, honey, it’s going to be fine.\u003c/em> First, we can’t guarantee that because we don’t know what the future holds. Second, it leaves our kids on the sidelines observing helplessly as they see things that might be difficult or harmful.” In contrast, hope is telling our kids, ‘“I don’t know what’s going to happen, but \u003cem>you\u003c/em> can make a difference.’”\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cstrong>The Connection Between Curiosity, Hope and Data \u003c/strong>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>According to surveys cited by Zaki, the majority of parents believe that teaching kids that “the world is dangerous and competitive” will help them be more successful. But this world-view can be detrimental to children’s academic success. Zaki points to a research study of over two hundred thousand people in thirty countries. Cynics “scored less well on tasks that measure cognitive ability, problem-solving, and mathematical skill.” Despite this, he writes, “the stereotype of the happy, gullible simpleton and the wise, bitter misanthrope lives on, stubborn enough that scientists have named it ‘the cynical genius illusion.’”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Why would cynicism dampen cognitive acumen? Perhaps part of the answer can be found in \u003cem>curiosity.\u003c/em> Curiosity primes children’s brains for learning. Curious kids want to know \u003cem>why\u003c/em>, and that pushes them past simplistic or absolutist notions about the world. Children have an impulse to explore and make sense of the world – but that also means that they can absorb the fears of the adults closest to them. “Kids are sponges,” said Zaki, “and often we’re saturating those sponges with the dirty water of our own biases, but we don’t have to. We can allow their curiosity to direct them to more accurate and hopeful information instead.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That means adults have work to do, Zaki said. Building hope often means “unlearning a lot of bad intel” that we’ve received from culture, media, and the “shredder of social media.” Scary stories can feed our worst perceptions about what people are like and cause us to overestimate dangers. “Hope isn’t a matter of tuning out and burying our heads in the sand,” said Zaki. “Hope is a matter of paying closer attention and focusing more intently on what the world has to offer. Hope is a response to data.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Take, for example, “stranger danger.” According to a \u003ca href=\"https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2023/01/24/parenting-in-america-today/\">2023 Pew Research survey\u003c/a>, 28 percent of American parents say they are “extremely worried” that their children will be abducted, with another 31% saying they were “somewhat worried” about it. And yet the actual risk of a child being kidnapped by a stranger is incredibly low. According to researchers for the University of California Irvine: “The actual risk of a teen or child being abducted by a stranger and killed or not returned is estimated at around 0.00007%, or one in 1.4 million annually—a risk so small that experts call it de minimis, meaning effectively zero.” They \u003ca href=\"https://online.ucpress.edu/collabra/article/2/1/10/112682/No-Child-Left-Alone-Moral-Judgments-about-Parents\">continue\u003c/a>:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>The idea that unsupervised children are in constant danger is relatively new. Just one generation ago, children had much more freedom to explore their surroundings. In the early 1970s, psychologist Roger Hart spent two years making maps of the places that children in a rural New England town were allowed to go by themselves. He found that 4- and 5-year-olds were allowed to travel throughout their neighborhoods alone, and 10-year-olds had free run of the town. Forty years later, Hart returned to the same town and found that although the crime rate was exactly the same, most children were now forbidden from roaming past their own backyards.\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>Zaki explains that data clearly shows that “people who think the world is dangerous do worse in terms of their mental health, their careers, and their happiness. But because we’ve passed [our fears] on to our kids, they are less trusting than we were, and they have less freedom than we did.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Zaki recommends modeling “fact-checking” our cynical beliefs. “When I find myself mistrusting somebody I’ve just met for the first time, I say, ‘Wait a minute, Zaki, what data do you have to back up this mistrust?’ And oftentimes the answer is nothing. I have no data here. It’s just my instincts, and our instincts skew negative compared to real evidence. So I try to question my cynical instincts, and I try to encourage my kids to question their cynicism as well, to be curious and skeptical instead of cynical.”\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cstrong>Why We Underestimate Human Goodness\u003c/strong>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>Researchers have found that humans generally tend to underestimate human goodness. This is another area where data can be both helpful and hopeful, said Zaki. Take this study as an \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2019/06/20/734141432/what-dropping-17-000-wallets-around-the-globe-can-teach-us-about-honesty\">example\u003c/a>: a group of researchers “dropped” nearly 17,000 wallets in 40 countries over the course of two years. Some wallets had no money, some had the equivalent of $13 and some had the equivalent of $100. The wallets all contained contact information for the “owner.” So how many people attempted to reach the owner of the lost wallet? Researchers assumed that the higher the amount of money in the wallet, the fewer would be returned. A poll of 279 “top-performing academic economists” agreed. But the exact opposite turned out to be true. Forty-six percent of empty wallets were reported, as compared with 61% of the $13 wallets and 72% of $100 wallets. The more money lost, the more people went out of their way to return the money to the owner. People wanted to help out strangers they had never met.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Zaki was not surprised by this because his research has found that “most people value compassion over selfishness.” This is important information: if our kids believe that the majority of people simply don’t care about pressing issues, it’s easy to feel hopeless. Look at climate change, said Zaki. “The average American thinks that 40% or fewer Americans want aggressive policy to protect the climate, but the actual number is more than two-thirds. There are many ways that our kids are probably part of a supermajority that they don’t know they’re part of. If you know that most people want, just like you do, a more peaceful, egalitarian, and sustainable world, then suddenly fighting for it makes a lot more sense.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After years of working with college students, Zaki believes that much of the young people’s anxiety stems from “the perception that the world is struggling and I can’t do anything about it.” Because of the internet, today’s adolescents are global citizens in ways previous generations were not. Feelings of helplessness accentuate distress.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Richard Weissbourd, director of Harvard’s Making Caring Common project, \u003ca href=\"https://www.pbs.org/parents/thrive/expanding-your-childs-circle-of-concern\">notes\u003c/a> that kids and adults are “more distressed when we feel helpless and passive — and more comfortable when we are taking action.” Adults can help their children turn empathy into activity, teaching them ways to “expand their circle of concern,” reach out to others, and make a difference in the community.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cstrong>How to Practice Social Savoring\u003c/strong>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>One practical strategy for fostering hope is savoring, or “noticing the good stuff as it happens.” Noticing small moments of human goodness helps us correct the negativity bias that most of us are prone to. As Zaki explains,“Our minds are structured to pay lots of attention to threats. And that’s good because it keeps us safe, but it’s also a bias that often makes us wrong about what the world is like and what people are like. So savoring beautiful things and positive experiences is a great exercise in general in terms of balancing our perspective.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Start by helping your kids practice “savoring” in general – to appreciate the taste of their favorite food, to linger outside during a beautiful sunset, or to pause to notice how good they are feeling during a special outing. That will help them translate this savoring to social situations – to mindfully notice the good in others. “I try do this with my kids all the time,” said Zaki, “I share with them if I notice somebody doing something really kind, and I ask them, ‘Tell me about the kind thing that somebody in your class did?’” These conversations can help change what we notice day-to-day, because if we want to share these moments with our kids, we have to look for goodness out in the world. Social savoring, over time, “becomes a habit of mind.”\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cstrong>The Art of ‘Underbearing Attentiveness’ \u003c/strong>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>When Zaki thinks of hopeful parenting, one phrase that comes to mind is “underbearing attentiveness.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He found this phrase in the writings of the late Emile Bruneau, a close friend and fellow psychology professor – someone he describes as “an unofficial ambassador for humanity’s better angels.” Bruneau had a difficult childhood, and amidst emotional pain and financial challenges, his dad’s “underbearing attentiveness” was his anchor of hope.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Emile felt utterly supported by his dad,” Zaki explains. “He knew that his dad was there when he needed him, but his dad was not a micromanaging parent. He let Emile explore and run through the forest, even from a very young age. They traipsed around together and were partners in life. His father allowed him to build his own world and become his own person under his watchful eye, but not under his thumb.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This approach reflects the research on healthy attachment patterns, said Zaki. “The sign of a securely attached baby or toddler is that they feel that they can explore the world in their parents’ presence. What we risk when we focus too much on protecting our children is draining them of their curiosity.” Underbearing attentiveness can be a way to intentionally temper our instincts to shield our children from all potential harm.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Becoming a hopeful parent in a cynical world isn’t easy, said Zaki. Perhaps the starting point is to expand our ideals as parents. “Keeping my kids safe is super important. But having them become engaged citizens of the world who embrace opportunities to connect with people? That’s equally as important.”\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In the face of uncertainty, parents often seek to protect children by warning them about the world’s threats and dangers. But is this the right approach?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamil Zaki is the director of the Stanford Social Neuroscience Lab and author of the new book “\u003ca href=\"https://www.amazon.com/Hope-Cynics-Surprising-Science-Goodness/dp/153874306X/\">Hope for Cynics: The Surprising Science of Human Goodness\u003c/a>.” In an interview with MindShift, Zaki said that when adults “try to keep our kids safe by making them feel unsafe,” they fuel a cynicism that can have unintended consequences for children’s mental and emotional well-being.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“If we focus kids on the negative – on the worst parts of life and the worst parts of humanity – we’re going to end up shrinking their world, making it harder for them to trust, and making it harder for them to explore, take risks, and form relationships.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That doesn’t mean adults should abandon safety protocols. Zaki is the father to two young daughters. When they complain about putting on sunscreen or buckling their seat belt, he asks them, “What’s my most important job?” And they respond, “To keep us safe.” That’s a fundamental parental responsibility.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But the more nuanced question is this, Zaki said: “What are we depriving our children of in the name of safety?” Emphasizing a hopeful mindset over a cynical one, Zaki argues, is an empirically wiser parenting choice.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cstrong>Defining Hope\u003c/strong>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>Let’s first define some terms. Zaki described optimism as a belief that the world \u003cem>will be\u003c/em> better and cynicism as the belief that it \u003cem>will never be \u003c/em>better. But hope, he said, is the conviction that the world \u003cem>can be\u003c/em> better. Under this framework, hope is empowering because it requires action and allows for agency. The future “can be better,” because humans can do something to make it so.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Zaki put it this way, “Optimism is us telling our kids, \u003cem>don’t worry, honey, it’s going to be fine.\u003c/em> First, we can’t guarantee that because we don’t know what the future holds. Second, it leaves our kids on the sidelines observing helplessly as they see things that might be difficult or harmful.” In contrast, hope is telling our kids, ‘“I don’t know what’s going to happen, but \u003cem>you\u003c/em> can make a difference.’”\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cstrong>The Connection Between Curiosity, Hope and Data \u003c/strong>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>According to surveys cited by Zaki, the majority of parents believe that teaching kids that “the world is dangerous and competitive” will help them be more successful. But this world-view can be detrimental to children’s academic success. Zaki points to a research study of over two hundred thousand people in thirty countries. Cynics “scored less well on tasks that measure cognitive ability, problem-solving, and mathematical skill.” Despite this, he writes, “the stereotype of the happy, gullible simpleton and the wise, bitter misanthrope lives on, stubborn enough that scientists have named it ‘the cynical genius illusion.’”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Why would cynicism dampen cognitive acumen? Perhaps part of the answer can be found in \u003cem>curiosity.\u003c/em> Curiosity primes children’s brains for learning. Curious kids want to know \u003cem>why\u003c/em>, and that pushes them past simplistic or absolutist notions about the world. Children have an impulse to explore and make sense of the world – but that also means that they can absorb the fears of the adults closest to them. “Kids are sponges,” said Zaki, “and often we’re saturating those sponges with the dirty water of our own biases, but we don’t have to. We can allow their curiosity to direct them to more accurate and hopeful information instead.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That means adults have work to do, Zaki said. Building hope often means “unlearning a lot of bad intel” that we’ve received from culture, media, and the “shredder of social media.” Scary stories can feed our worst perceptions about what people are like and cause us to overestimate dangers. “Hope isn’t a matter of tuning out and burying our heads in the sand,” said Zaki. “Hope is a matter of paying closer attention and focusing more intently on what the world has to offer. Hope is a response to data.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Take, for example, “stranger danger.” According to a \u003ca href=\"https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2023/01/24/parenting-in-america-today/\">2023 Pew Research survey\u003c/a>, 28 percent of American parents say they are “extremely worried” that their children will be abducted, with another 31% saying they were “somewhat worried” about it. And yet the actual risk of a child being kidnapped by a stranger is incredibly low. According to researchers for the University of California Irvine: “The actual risk of a teen or child being abducted by a stranger and killed or not returned is estimated at around 0.00007%, or one in 1.4 million annually—a risk so small that experts call it de minimis, meaning effectively zero.” They \u003ca href=\"https://online.ucpress.edu/collabra/article/2/1/10/112682/No-Child-Left-Alone-Moral-Judgments-about-Parents\">continue\u003c/a>:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>The idea that unsupervised children are in constant danger is relatively new. Just one generation ago, children had much more freedom to explore their surroundings. In the early 1970s, psychologist Roger Hart spent two years making maps of the places that children in a rural New England town were allowed to go by themselves. He found that 4- and 5-year-olds were allowed to travel throughout their neighborhoods alone, and 10-year-olds had free run of the town. Forty years later, Hart returned to the same town and found that although the crime rate was exactly the same, most children were now forbidden from roaming past their own backyards.\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>Zaki explains that data clearly shows that “people who think the world is dangerous do worse in terms of their mental health, their careers, and their happiness. But because we’ve passed [our fears] on to our kids, they are less trusting than we were, and they have less freedom than we did.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Zaki recommends modeling “fact-checking” our cynical beliefs. “When I find myself mistrusting somebody I’ve just met for the first time, I say, ‘Wait a minute, Zaki, what data do you have to back up this mistrust?’ And oftentimes the answer is nothing. I have no data here. It’s just my instincts, and our instincts skew negative compared to real evidence. So I try to question my cynical instincts, and I try to encourage my kids to question their cynicism as well, to be curious and skeptical instead of cynical.”\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cstrong>Why We Underestimate Human Goodness\u003c/strong>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>Researchers have found that humans generally tend to underestimate human goodness. This is another area where data can be both helpful and hopeful, said Zaki. Take this study as an \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2019/06/20/734141432/what-dropping-17-000-wallets-around-the-globe-can-teach-us-about-honesty\">example\u003c/a>: a group of researchers “dropped” nearly 17,000 wallets in 40 countries over the course of two years. Some wallets had no money, some had the equivalent of $13 and some had the equivalent of $100. The wallets all contained contact information for the “owner.” So how many people attempted to reach the owner of the lost wallet? Researchers assumed that the higher the amount of money in the wallet, the fewer would be returned. A poll of 279 “top-performing academic economists” agreed. But the exact opposite turned out to be true. Forty-six percent of empty wallets were reported, as compared with 61% of the $13 wallets and 72% of $100 wallets. The more money lost, the more people went out of their way to return the money to the owner. People wanted to help out strangers they had never met.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Zaki was not surprised by this because his research has found that “most people value compassion over selfishness.” This is important information: if our kids believe that the majority of people simply don’t care about pressing issues, it’s easy to feel hopeless. Look at climate change, said Zaki. “The average American thinks that 40% or fewer Americans want aggressive policy to protect the climate, but the actual number is more than two-thirds. There are many ways that our kids are probably part of a supermajority that they don’t know they’re part of. If you know that most people want, just like you do, a more peaceful, egalitarian, and sustainable world, then suddenly fighting for it makes a lot more sense.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After years of working with college students, Zaki believes that much of the young people’s anxiety stems from “the perception that the world is struggling and I can’t do anything about it.” Because of the internet, today’s adolescents are global citizens in ways previous generations were not. Feelings of helplessness accentuate distress.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Richard Weissbourd, director of Harvard’s Making Caring Common project, \u003ca href=\"https://www.pbs.org/parents/thrive/expanding-your-childs-circle-of-concern\">notes\u003c/a> that kids and adults are “more distressed when we feel helpless and passive — and more comfortable when we are taking action.” Adults can help their children turn empathy into activity, teaching them ways to “expand their circle of concern,” reach out to others, and make a difference in the community.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cstrong>How to Practice Social Savoring\u003c/strong>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>One practical strategy for fostering hope is savoring, or “noticing the good stuff as it happens.” Noticing small moments of human goodness helps us correct the negativity bias that most of us are prone to. As Zaki explains,“Our minds are structured to pay lots of attention to threats. And that’s good because it keeps us safe, but it’s also a bias that often makes us wrong about what the world is like and what people are like. So savoring beautiful things and positive experiences is a great exercise in general in terms of balancing our perspective.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Start by helping your kids practice “savoring” in general – to appreciate the taste of their favorite food, to linger outside during a beautiful sunset, or to pause to notice how good they are feeling during a special outing. That will help them translate this savoring to social situations – to mindfully notice the good in others. “I try do this with my kids all the time,” said Zaki, “I share with them if I notice somebody doing something really kind, and I ask them, ‘Tell me about the kind thing that somebody in your class did?’” These conversations can help change what we notice day-to-day, because if we want to share these moments with our kids, we have to look for goodness out in the world. Social savoring, over time, “becomes a habit of mind.”\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cstrong>The Art of ‘Underbearing Attentiveness’ \u003c/strong>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>When Zaki thinks of hopeful parenting, one phrase that comes to mind is “underbearing attentiveness.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He found this phrase in the writings of the late Emile Bruneau, a close friend and fellow psychology professor – someone he describes as “an unofficial ambassador for humanity’s better angels.” Bruneau had a difficult childhood, and amidst emotional pain and financial challenges, his dad’s “underbearing attentiveness” was his anchor of hope.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Emile felt utterly supported by his dad,” Zaki explains. “He knew that his dad was there when he needed him, but his dad was not a micromanaging parent. He let Emile explore and run through the forest, even from a very young age. They traipsed around together and were partners in life. His father allowed him to build his own world and become his own person under his watchful eye, but not under his thumb.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This approach reflects the research on healthy attachment patterns, said Zaki. “The sign of a securely attached baby or toddler is that they feel that they can explore the world in their parents’ presence. What we risk when we focus too much on protecting our children is draining them of their curiosity.” Underbearing attentiveness can be a way to intentionally temper our instincts to shield our children from all potential harm.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Becoming a hopeful parent in a cynical world isn’t easy, said Zaki. Perhaps the starting point is to expand our ideals as parents. “Keeping my kids safe is super important. But having them become engaged citizens of the world who embrace opportunities to connect with people? That’s equally as important.”\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/3000x1688+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2F4f%2F29%2F8cace8424800920a5f66f221c2c8%2Fweek2-digital-mainimage-fullsize.gif\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Imagine something you love. Then imagine it’s threatened.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That’s what Jada Alexander experienced when she was studying coral reefs in French Polynesia. During her first trip, as a student at the University of California, Santa Barbara, she was captivated. “The coral reef was vibrant. It was beautiful,” she recalls. It was teeming with life, full of crabs and fish.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But on a return trip one year later, much of the reef \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2024/04/17/1245085914/coral-reefs-bleaching-climate-change-algae\">appeared dead\u003c/a>. “It was dull and gray,” she says, which left her feeling hopeless.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alexander is not alone. \u003ca href=\"https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2542519621002783#:~:text=Findings,and%20associated%20feelings%20of%20betrayal\">Survey data \u003c/a>has shown that more than half of young adults have felt anxious, angry, powerless or helpless about human-driven climate change.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“If our young people can’t have hope and engage in climate action, then we’re going to have that much harder of a time bending the curve back,” says \u003ca href=\"https://profiles.ucsf.edu/elissa.epel\">Elissa Epel, \u003c/a>a renowned stress researcher at UC San Francisco.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So, she and a group of her colleagues developed a new course, called \u003ca href=\"https://www.climateresilience.online/\">Climate Resilience\u003c/a>, which they offered for the first time at several UC campuses last spring. The goal is to turn students’ distress about the climate into collective action. Alexander signed up for the class and became a teaching assistant.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The course offers inspiring lectures from scientists and leaders in the climate movement to introduce a counternarrative to the doom and gloom. Many of us are living in an “information bubble” that can be devastating, Epel says. We’re inundated with negative stories about record heat, hurricanes, floods and wildfires. The challenge is real, but so too are the potential solutions.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And, crucially, the course teaches resilience and coping skills, including mindfulness meditation, to empower students.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“There’s an arc — or a process — for leading people out of these dark inner worlds where they feel alone and separate,” Epel says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>People who feel negative and hopeless are more likely to disengage or walk away.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The great Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh says \u003ca href=\"https://plumvillage.org/podcasts/the-way-out-is-in\">the way out is in\u003c/a>,” she says. To transcend fear and anger, people need to practice compassion, not only for themselves but for others.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Students do come in very skeptical,” says\u003ca href=\"https://profiles.ucsd.edu/jyoti.mishra\"> Jyoti Mishra, \u003c/a>a neuroscientist at UC San Diego and co-director of the course. But by the end of the class, there’s a shift in mindset among many, she says. Once a person feels more positive, it can be easier for them to imagine being part of the solution.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End-of-class surveys were very positive, and the course will be offered at 10 UC campuses next spring.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Students reported an increased sense of belonging and a belief that they could “work with others” on climate change, says \u003ca href=\"https://health.ucdavis.edu/nursing/ourteam/faculty/Goldin_bio.html\">Philippe Goldin\u003c/a>, a clinical neuroscientist at UC Davis who co-leads the Climate Resilience course.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Students in the course took action: They worked in community gardens dedicated to sustainable agriculture, a waste reduction workshop and a recycling project focused on clothing. Jada Alexander, who has graduated, is now starting \u003ca href=\"https://www.daybreakbeachclub.com/\">an initiative\u003c/a> that integrates surfing with environmental stewardship.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alexander knows the solutions are complex, and she still fears for the planet, but “I think that the class increased my ability to be a part of the solution,” she says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Epel says the techniques and exercises taught in the class are “universal skills” that can help people manage stress from all sorts of situations. If you want to try, here are some strategies adapted from the course.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>1. Slow down with moments of calm\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fec%2F23%2F4aabecba4e43b9187baeb6ed9532%2Fweek2-digital-spot-calm-beach.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>If you want to stay engaged with the world’s problems, you have to start with your own well-being.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When you pause to be present and let go of worries, it’s a chance for a quick reset.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In daily life, you can look for prompts or create new rituals to help you slow down. For instance, if there’s a church, town hall or campus bell that chimes, you can use that as a moment to pause. Or you can set a reminder on your phone to take pauses throughout your day.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“There’s all sorts of cues and signals that can remind us to stop and take a breath,” \u003ca href=\"https://drdianahill.com/\">says Diana Hill,\u003c/a> a clinical psychologist who teaches the course at UC Santa Barbara. When we focus on breath we can activate the parasympathetic nervous system — so our body feels more at ease.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you want to try a longer self-care pause, \u003ca href=\"https://ucsf.box.com/s/gw0hwww8q407wxoxerxfvvoqmnaqtmws\">here’s a nature meditation\u003c/a> used in the course from meditation teacher Mark Coleman.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>2. Just like me: Stare into the eyes of a stranger\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>In the class, people are asked to pick a partner, typically someone they don’t know. Then, they’re asked to look into each other’s eyes as they’re led through a guided meditation. “This can be uncomfortable,” Hill says, so it’s OK to close your eyes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You can use this \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3QRFeFOlm4\">recording \u003c/a>by Jack Kornfield as a guide.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>“This person was once a small child just like me. This person has had happy times, just like me,” it begins.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The exercise is intended to help people see how much they have in common with every human, even strangers or people who see the world differently.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“\u003cem>This person has been hurt, just like me.\u003c/em> \u003cem>This person has experienced physical pain, just like me. This person wants to be loved, just like me.” \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The meditation ends by asking you to picture your partner’s happy moments and to send them this message: “I know you want to be happy, just like me.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This practice of seeing that common humanity is pretty powerful, Hill says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You can also use the \u003cem>Just Like Me\u003c/em> exercise with someone you have a difficult relationship with. Even if they’re not sitting opposite you, you can imagine looking at them.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>3. Honoring others’ pain: It’s OK to cry\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fd9%2Fee%2Ffba3a1344932943b9c4003494239%2Fweek2-digital-spot-honoring-pain.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>“To be activists for any cause, we need to work together, and that starts by expressing our grief, ” Epel says. The course adapted a practice from Joanna Macy and Molly Brown, called \u003ca href=\"https://workthatreconnects.org/resources/open-sentences-on-honoring-our-pain/\">Honoring our Pain\u003c/a>, which takes about 15 minutes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Find a friend to try this with. Take turns voicing your concerns. Begin with this prompt: “What concerns me most about the world and society today is….” As one person speaks, the other listens.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>People think no one wants to hear any thoughts of gloom or grief, Epel says. “But we need to talk about it. We need to process these very heavy emotions of sorrow.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And here’s an important takeaway: Listening is a gift. “The quality with which we really listen and offer our attention to others is an act of compassion,” \u003ca href=\"https://health.ucdavis.edu/nursing/ourteam/faculty/Goldin_bio.html\">Goldin\u003c/a> says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>During these conversations, “you begin to experience a sense of trust in experiencing your own emotions, sitting with your own emotions and the emotions of others,” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you do this repeatedly, you really begin to understand what is possible in trusting and being with another person. “It’s very powerful,” Goldin says.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>4. Joy spreads, and so do grumbles\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2F60%2Ffd%2F5989bf2b41a7adf3cf93225dcb84%2Fweek2-digital-spot-spreading-joy.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Partners again! This takes about 10 minutes, with each person talking about half the time. For two minutes, you get to complain. It can be a stream of consciousness gripe session — everything that annoys you, anything that’s wrong!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Notice how it feels to let it all out. Now it’s time to flip the script.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For the next two minutes, talk about things that bring you joy. What is bringing you happiness today? What are you grateful for at this moment? \u003ca href=\"https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC10393216/\">A recent study\u003c/a> found that people who are taught to practice gratitude have better mental health and fewer symptoms of anxiety and depression.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I very distinctly remember this exercise,” says Alexander. When people complained, the negative energy spread really quickly. Then there was a distinct shift when they switched to gratitude. “People were laughing, people were smiling, and it created such a vibrant energy throughout the room, “ she says.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>5. Write a love letter to the Earth\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2F81%2F3c%2Ff4efd8b14a1daca760cc6595379b%2Fweek2-digital-spot-letter-earth.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Take a short walk outside — five or 10 minutes should do it — or just sit quietly in a favorite outdoor spot. Think of it as a mini nature retreat to connect with the natural world. When you feel relaxed, you can start to write down some thoughts and compose a letter. Here are some potential prompt questions borrowed from the class.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>What has your experience been like in nature? Have you felt love?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Epel says letting yourself feel love and gratitude for the Earth can elicit strong emotions, so let go and fall into the stillness. You can check out Vietnamese Buddhist monk \u003ca href=\"https://emergencemagazine.org/essay/ten-love-letters-to-the-earth/\">Thich Nhat Hanh’s love letters to the Earth\u003c/a> to help you get started.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>6. Letter to your future self\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>Writing a letter to your future self is a “perspective taking” practice, says Hill. It’s a way to step away from your current struggles or stressors and shift the focus to all your potential opportunities.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Start by imagining yourself at some date in the future, be it one year from now or even 20 years down the road. What is it that you hope for yourself? Where do you want to be? What kind of hurdles have you overcome?\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-embed npr-promo-card insettwocolumn\">\n\u003cdiv class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\u003c/div>\n\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Maybe you can see a future where the climate crisis is being solved, where you’re working with others on solutions to specific problems. Once you have that kind of future in mind, you could start thinking about some specific goals — and steps to take — to get there. “It can be quite motivating,” Hill says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Another option is to write a letter to your future self about what happens if you don’t engage in helping solve the problem. “If you bring awareness to the pain or the discomfort of what could happen if you didn’t do anything, that can be a motivating force too,” Hill says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Stress Less editors are Carmel Wroth and Jane Greenhalgh.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/3000x1688+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2F4f%2F29%2F8cace8424800920a5f66f221c2c8%2Fweek2-digital-mainimage-fullsize.gif\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Imagine something you love. Then imagine it’s threatened.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That’s what Jada Alexander experienced when she was studying coral reefs in French Polynesia. During her first trip, as a student at the University of California, Santa Barbara, she was captivated. “The coral reef was vibrant. It was beautiful,” she recalls. It was teeming with life, full of crabs and fish.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But on a return trip one year later, much of the reef \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2024/04/17/1245085914/coral-reefs-bleaching-climate-change-algae\">appeared dead\u003c/a>. “It was dull and gray,” she says, which left her feeling hopeless.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alexander is not alone. \u003ca href=\"https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2542519621002783#:~:text=Findings,and%20associated%20feelings%20of%20betrayal\">Survey data \u003c/a>has shown that more than half of young adults have felt anxious, angry, powerless or helpless about human-driven climate change.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“If our young people can’t have hope and engage in climate action, then we’re going to have that much harder of a time bending the curve back,” says \u003ca href=\"https://profiles.ucsf.edu/elissa.epel\">Elissa Epel, \u003c/a>a renowned stress researcher at UC San Francisco.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So, she and a group of her colleagues developed a new course, called \u003ca href=\"https://www.climateresilience.online/\">Climate Resilience\u003c/a>, which they offered for the first time at several UC campuses last spring. The goal is to turn students’ distress about the climate into collective action. Alexander signed up for the class and became a teaching assistant.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The course offers inspiring lectures from scientists and leaders in the climate movement to introduce a counternarrative to the doom and gloom. Many of us are living in an “information bubble” that can be devastating, Epel says. We’re inundated with negative stories about record heat, hurricanes, floods and wildfires. The challenge is real, but so too are the potential solutions.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And, crucially, the course teaches resilience and coping skills, including mindfulness meditation, to empower students.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“There’s an arc — or a process — for leading people out of these dark inner worlds where they feel alone and separate,” Epel says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>People who feel negative and hopeless are more likely to disengage or walk away.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“The great Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh says \u003ca href=\"https://plumvillage.org/podcasts/the-way-out-is-in\">the way out is in\u003c/a>,” she says. To transcend fear and anger, people need to practice compassion, not only for themselves but for others.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Students do come in very skeptical,” says\u003ca href=\"https://profiles.ucsd.edu/jyoti.mishra\"> Jyoti Mishra, \u003c/a>a neuroscientist at UC San Diego and co-director of the course. But by the end of the class, there’s a shift in mindset among many, she says. Once a person feels more positive, it can be easier for them to imagine being part of the solution.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End-of-class surveys were very positive, and the course will be offered at 10 UC campuses next spring.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Students reported an increased sense of belonging and a belief that they could “work with others” on climate change, says \u003ca href=\"https://health.ucdavis.edu/nursing/ourteam/faculty/Goldin_bio.html\">Philippe Goldin\u003c/a>, a clinical neuroscientist at UC Davis who co-leads the Climate Resilience course.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Students in the course took action: They worked in community gardens dedicated to sustainable agriculture, a waste reduction workshop and a recycling project focused on clothing. Jada Alexander, who has graduated, is now starting \u003ca href=\"https://www.daybreakbeachclub.com/\">an initiative\u003c/a> that integrates surfing with environmental stewardship.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alexander knows the solutions are complex, and she still fears for the planet, but “I think that the class increased my ability to be a part of the solution,” she says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Epel says the techniques and exercises taught in the class are “universal skills” that can help people manage stress from all sorts of situations. If you want to try, here are some strategies adapted from the course.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>1. Slow down with moments of calm\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fec%2F23%2F4aabecba4e43b9187baeb6ed9532%2Fweek2-digital-spot-calm-beach.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>If you want to stay engaged with the world’s problems, you have to start with your own well-being.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When you pause to be present and let go of worries, it’s a chance for a quick reset.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In daily life, you can look for prompts or create new rituals to help you slow down. For instance, if there’s a church, town hall or campus bell that chimes, you can use that as a moment to pause. Or you can set a reminder on your phone to take pauses throughout your day.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“There’s all sorts of cues and signals that can remind us to stop and take a breath,” \u003ca href=\"https://drdianahill.com/\">says Diana Hill,\u003c/a> a clinical psychologist who teaches the course at UC Santa Barbara. When we focus on breath we can activate the parasympathetic nervous system — so our body feels more at ease.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you want to try a longer self-care pause, \u003ca href=\"https://ucsf.box.com/s/gw0hwww8q407wxoxerxfvvoqmnaqtmws\">here’s a nature meditation\u003c/a> used in the course from meditation teacher Mark Coleman.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>2. Just like me: Stare into the eyes of a stranger\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>In the class, people are asked to pick a partner, typically someone they don’t know. Then, they’re asked to look into each other’s eyes as they’re led through a guided meditation. “This can be uncomfortable,” Hill says, so it’s OK to close your eyes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You can use this \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3QRFeFOlm4\">recording \u003c/a>by Jack Kornfield as a guide.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>“This person was once a small child just like me. This person has had happy times, just like me,” it begins.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The exercise is intended to help people see how much they have in common with every human, even strangers or people who see the world differently.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“\u003cem>This person has been hurt, just like me.\u003c/em> \u003cem>This person has experienced physical pain, just like me. This person wants to be loved, just like me.” \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The meditation ends by asking you to picture your partner’s happy moments and to send them this message: “I know you want to be happy, just like me.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This practice of seeing that common humanity is pretty powerful, Hill says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You can also use the \u003cem>Just Like Me\u003c/em> exercise with someone you have a difficult relationship with. Even if they’re not sitting opposite you, you can imagine looking at them.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>3. Honoring others’ pain: It’s OK to cry\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fd9%2Fee%2Ffba3a1344932943b9c4003494239%2Fweek2-digital-spot-honoring-pain.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>“To be activists for any cause, we need to work together, and that starts by expressing our grief, ” Epel says. The course adapted a practice from Joanna Macy and Molly Brown, called \u003ca href=\"https://workthatreconnects.org/resources/open-sentences-on-honoring-our-pain/\">Honoring our Pain\u003c/a>, which takes about 15 minutes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Find a friend to try this with. Take turns voicing your concerns. Begin with this prompt: “What concerns me most about the world and society today is….” As one person speaks, the other listens.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>People think no one wants to hear any thoughts of gloom or grief, Epel says. “But we need to talk about it. We need to process these very heavy emotions of sorrow.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And here’s an important takeaway: Listening is a gift. “The quality with which we really listen and offer our attention to others is an act of compassion,” \u003ca href=\"https://health.ucdavis.edu/nursing/ourteam/faculty/Goldin_bio.html\">Goldin\u003c/a> says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>During these conversations, “you begin to experience a sense of trust in experiencing your own emotions, sitting with your own emotions and the emotions of others,” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you do this repeatedly, you really begin to understand what is possible in trusting and being with another person. “It’s very powerful,” Goldin says.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>4. Joy spreads, and so do grumbles\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2F60%2Ffd%2F5989bf2b41a7adf3cf93225dcb84%2Fweek2-digital-spot-spreading-joy.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Partners again! This takes about 10 minutes, with each person talking about half the time. For two minutes, you get to complain. It can be a stream of consciousness gripe session — everything that annoys you, anything that’s wrong!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Notice how it feels to let it all out. Now it’s time to flip the script.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For the next two minutes, talk about things that bring you joy. What is bringing you happiness today? What are you grateful for at this moment? \u003ca href=\"https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC10393216/\">A recent study\u003c/a> found that people who are taught to practice gratitude have better mental health and fewer symptoms of anxiety and depression.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I very distinctly remember this exercise,” says Alexander. When people complained, the negative energy spread really quickly. Then there was a distinct shift when they switched to gratitude. “People were laughing, people were smiling, and it created such a vibrant energy throughout the room, “ she says.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>5. Write a love letter to the Earth\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims3/default/strip/false/crop/800x800+0+0/resize/1200/quality/75/format/jpeg/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fnpr-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2F81%2F3c%2Ff4efd8b14a1daca760cc6595379b%2Fweek2-digital-spot-letter-earth.png\">\u003cfigcaption>\u003ccite> (Maria Fabrizio for NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Take a short walk outside — five or 10 minutes should do it — or just sit quietly in a favorite outdoor spot. Think of it as a mini nature retreat to connect with the natural world. When you feel relaxed, you can start to write down some thoughts and compose a letter. Here are some potential prompt questions borrowed from the class.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>What has your experience been like in nature? Have you felt love?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Epel says letting yourself feel love and gratitude for the Earth can elicit strong emotions, so let go and fall into the stillness. You can check out Vietnamese Buddhist monk \u003ca href=\"https://emergencemagazine.org/essay/ten-love-letters-to-the-earth/\">Thich Nhat Hanh’s love letters to the Earth\u003c/a> to help you get started.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>6. Letter to your future self\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>Writing a letter to your future self is a “perspective taking” practice, says Hill. It’s a way to step away from your current struggles or stressors and shift the focus to all your potential opportunities.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Start by imagining yourself at some date in the future, be it one year from now or even 20 years down the road. What is it that you hope for yourself? Where do you want to be? What kind of hurdles have you overcome?\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-block-embed npr-promo-card insettwocolumn\">\n\u003cdiv class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\u003c/div>\n\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Maybe you can see a future where the climate crisis is being solved, where you’re working with others on solutions to specific problems. Once you have that kind of future in mind, you could start thinking about some specific goals — and steps to take — to get there. “It can be quite motivating,” Hill says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Another option is to write a letter to your future self about what happens if you don’t engage in helping solve the problem. “If you bring awareness to the pain or the discomfort of what could happen if you didn’t do anything, that can be a motivating force too,” Hill says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Stress Less editors are Carmel Wroth and Jane Greenhalgh.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Psychologists have long warned that children’s lives are overscheduled, which undermines their ability to develop non-academic skills that they’ll need in adulthood, from coping with setbacks to building strong relationships. Now a trio of economists say they’ve been able to calculate some of these psychological costs.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">In a new \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0272775723001504?via%3Dihub\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">data analysis published in the February 2024 issue of the Economics of Education Review\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, three economists from the University of Georgia and the Federal Reserve Board found that students are assigned so much homework and signed up for so many extracurricular activities that the “last hour” was no longer helping to build their academic skills. Instead, the activities were actually harming their mental well-being, making students more anxious, depressed or angry. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“We’re not saying that all these activities are bad, but that the total is bad,” said Carolina Caetano, one of the study’s authors and an assistant professor of economics at the University of Georgia. Homework and scheduled activities, she said, were eating away at time for sleep and socializing, which are also important. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The downsides of homework and scheduled activities were most pronounced during the high school years, when students are feeling pressure to earn high grades and load up on extracurriculars for their college applications, the researchers found.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Unfortunately, the researchers weren’t able to put a precise number on how many hours is too much, and Caetano explained to me that the number might not be the same for everyone.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Parents who worry that their children might be overscheduled should ask themselves whether they feel their days are so busy that their children don’t even have time for spontaneous play dates, Caetano said. “If you feel stretched, you’re probably on the too-much side of this,” she said.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Caetano and her research team analyzed the time diaries of 4,300 children and teens, from kindergarten through 12th grade. The diaries had been collected over the years, dating back to 1997, as part of the \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://psidonline.isr.umich.edu/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Panel Study of Income Dynamics (PSID)\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, a large nationally representative household survey overseen by the University of Michigan. Children, parents and survey workers kept track of a random weekday and a random weekend day for each child, allowing the researchers to see how children spent every minute.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The researchers described a wide assortment of activities intended to improve children’s skills as “enrichment.” Homework was the largest component, adding up to two thirds of the total enrichment hours. The remainder of the enrichment time was occupied by reading (14% of the enrichment time), followed by before- and after-school programs (7%). In the diaries, relatively little time was spent being read to by parents, tutoring and other academic lessons, and on non-academic lessons, such as piano, soccer lessons or driver’s ed. On average, children spent 45 minutes a day on all of them, ranging from zero to four hours a day.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The researchers then compared time spent on these enrichment activities with academic test scores along with non-cognitive psychological measures, which were based on parent surveys of their children’s behaviors, such as being withdrawn, anxious or angry. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">At first, there seemed to be a strong association between time spent on enrichment and academic skills and positive behaviors. That is, students who were more scheduled also had higher test scores and better behaviors. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">But scheduled students also tend to be wealthier. Their families have the resources for tutors, after-school activities, or nannies who enforce homework time. It’s hard to tell how much the activities were responsible for boosting students’ skills or whether these highly resourced children would have done just as well on the tests and non-cognitive measures without the activities. After adjusting for family income and other demographic characteristics, some of these benefits melted away. Still, some association between scheduled activities and academic skills remained. In other words, even between two children with the same demographics and family income, the one that was more scheduled and spent more time on homework scored higher.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">However, these scheduled children of the same income and demographics still differ from each other in important ways. Some are more motivated or conscientious. Some have photographic memories or are hard working. Some have a gift for math or music. The children who choose to do more homework and participate in after-school activities are exactly the ones who are more likely to score higher anyway. It’s a thorny knot to disentangle how much the homework and scheduled activities are driving the improvement in skills.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">In this study, the researchers used a new statistical technique for large datasets to disentangle it. And once they adjusted for the effects of the students’ unobservable or inner differences, all the academic benefits melted away, and well-being turned negative. That is, the final or marginal hour of homework and activities didn’t raise a student’s test scores at all and lowered a child’s non-cognitive behaviors.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The researchers also noticed a dilemma in the data. The psychological downsides of overscheduling hit before students’ cognitive skills were maximized. There’s a point where a child could still boost his academic skills by doing another hour of homework or tutoring, for example, but it would come at the expense of mental well-being. With more time spent on these activities, the academic returns eventually fall to zero, but by that time, there’s been a considerable hit to well-being.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">A lot more research is needed to understand if some activities are harming students more than others. One question Caetano has concerns timing. She wonders what would happen if little kids were less scheduled in elementary school. Would they then have more resilience to deal with the time pressures in high school? \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The statistical techniques in this study are new and researchers debate about how and when to use them. Josh Goodman, an education economist at Boston University who was not involved in the study, commented that the causal claims between overscheduling and academic skills and mental well-being aren’t “perfect,” but called them “good enough.” He said on X (formerly Twitter) that “the paper raises some very uncomfortable questions (including about my own parenting decisions!)” \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Of course, parents aren’t entirely to blame. Schools assign the homework and their children’s grades will suffer if it isn’t done. College admissions departments value applicants with high grades and activities. Caetano sympathizes with parents who find it hard to individually push back against the current system. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">It’s similarly difficult for one school to unilaterally change homework policies when colleges could penalize their students. Indeed, schools that have tried reducing the pressure have sometimes felt the wrath of parents who are worried that less homework will cause their children to fall behind the competition. Ultimately, Caetano says that education policymakers on the state or federal level need to set policies to ratchet down the pressure for all.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">This story about \u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/proof-points-overscheduling-kids-lives-causes-depression-and-anxiety-study-finds/\">\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">extracurricular activities\u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> was written by Jill Barshay and produced by \u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The Hechinger Report\u003c/span>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, a nonprofit, independent news organization focused on inequality and innovation in education. Sign up for the \u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/proofpoints/\">\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Proof Points newsletter\u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">.\u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Psychologists have long warned that children’s lives are overscheduled, which undermines their ability to develop non-academic skills that they’ll need in adulthood, from coping with setbacks to building strong relationships. Now a trio of economists say they’ve been able to calculate some of these psychological costs.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">In a new \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0272775723001504?via%3Dihub\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">data analysis published in the February 2024 issue of the Economics of Education Review\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, three economists from the University of Georgia and the Federal Reserve Board found that students are assigned so much homework and signed up for so many extracurricular activities that the “last hour” was no longer helping to build their academic skills. Instead, the activities were actually harming their mental well-being, making students more anxious, depressed or angry. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“We’re not saying that all these activities are bad, but that the total is bad,” said Carolina Caetano, one of the study’s authors and an assistant professor of economics at the University of Georgia. Homework and scheduled activities, she said, were eating away at time for sleep and socializing, which are also important. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The downsides of homework and scheduled activities were most pronounced during the high school years, when students are feeling pressure to earn high grades and load up on extracurriculars for their college applications, the researchers found.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Unfortunately, the researchers weren’t able to put a precise number on how many hours is too much, and Caetano explained to me that the number might not be the same for everyone.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Parents who worry that their children might be overscheduled should ask themselves whether they feel their days are so busy that their children don’t even have time for spontaneous play dates, Caetano said. “If you feel stretched, you’re probably on the too-much side of this,” she said.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Caetano and her research team analyzed the time diaries of 4,300 children and teens, from kindergarten through 12th grade. The diaries had been collected over the years, dating back to 1997, as part of the \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://psidonline.isr.umich.edu/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Panel Study of Income Dynamics (PSID)\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, a large nationally representative household survey overseen by the University of Michigan. Children, parents and survey workers kept track of a random weekday and a random weekend day for each child, allowing the researchers to see how children spent every minute.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The researchers described a wide assortment of activities intended to improve children’s skills as “enrichment.” Homework was the largest component, adding up to two thirds of the total enrichment hours. The remainder of the enrichment time was occupied by reading (14% of the enrichment time), followed by before- and after-school programs (7%). In the diaries, relatively little time was spent being read to by parents, tutoring and other academic lessons, and on non-academic lessons, such as piano, soccer lessons or driver’s ed. On average, children spent 45 minutes a day on all of them, ranging from zero to four hours a day.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The researchers then compared time spent on these enrichment activities with academic test scores along with non-cognitive psychological measures, which were based on parent surveys of their children’s behaviors, such as being withdrawn, anxious or angry. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">At first, there seemed to be a strong association between time spent on enrichment and academic skills and positive behaviors. That is, students who were more scheduled also had higher test scores and better behaviors. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">But scheduled students also tend to be wealthier. Their families have the resources for tutors, after-school activities, or nannies who enforce homework time. It’s hard to tell how much the activities were responsible for boosting students’ skills or whether these highly resourced children would have done just as well on the tests and non-cognitive measures without the activities. After adjusting for family income and other demographic characteristics, some of these benefits melted away. Still, some association between scheduled activities and academic skills remained. In other words, even between two children with the same demographics and family income, the one that was more scheduled and spent more time on homework scored higher.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">However, these scheduled children of the same income and demographics still differ from each other in important ways. Some are more motivated or conscientious. Some have photographic memories or are hard working. Some have a gift for math or music. The children who choose to do more homework and participate in after-school activities are exactly the ones who are more likely to score higher anyway. It’s a thorny knot to disentangle how much the homework and scheduled activities are driving the improvement in skills.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">In this study, the researchers used a new statistical technique for large datasets to disentangle it. And once they adjusted for the effects of the students’ unobservable or inner differences, all the academic benefits melted away, and well-being turned negative. That is, the final or marginal hour of homework and activities didn’t raise a student’s test scores at all and lowered a child’s non-cognitive behaviors.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The researchers also noticed a dilemma in the data. The psychological downsides of overscheduling hit before students’ cognitive skills were maximized. There’s a point where a child could still boost his academic skills by doing another hour of homework or tutoring, for example, but it would come at the expense of mental well-being. With more time spent on these activities, the academic returns eventually fall to zero, but by that time, there’s been a considerable hit to well-being.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">A lot more research is needed to understand if some activities are harming students more than others. One question Caetano has concerns timing. She wonders what would happen if little kids were less scheduled in elementary school. Would they then have more resilience to deal with the time pressures in high school? \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The statistical techniques in this study are new and researchers debate about how and when to use them. Josh Goodman, an education economist at Boston University who was not involved in the study, commented that the causal claims between overscheduling and academic skills and mental well-being aren’t “perfect,” but called them “good enough.” He said on X (formerly Twitter) that “the paper raises some very uncomfortable questions (including about my own parenting decisions!)” \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Of course, parents aren’t entirely to blame. Schools assign the homework and their children’s grades will suffer if it isn’t done. College admissions departments value applicants with high grades and activities. Caetano sympathizes with parents who find it hard to individually push back against the current system. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">It’s similarly difficult for one school to unilaterally change homework policies when colleges could penalize their students. Indeed, schools that have tried reducing the pressure have sometimes felt the wrath of parents who are worried that less homework will cause their children to fall behind the competition. Ultimately, Caetano says that education policymakers on the state or federal level need to set policies to ratchet down the pressure for all.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cp>\u003cem>This post was \u003ca href=\"https://parentingtranslator.substack.com/p/how-to-help-your-anxious-child\">originally published\u003c/a> by Parenting Translator. Sign up for \u003ca href=\"https://parentingtranslator.substack.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">the newsletter\u003c/a> and follow Parenting Translator \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/parentingtranslator/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">on Instagram\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Anxiety disorders are the most common mental health concern in children. The rates of children with anxiety have been growing dramatically. In 2021, a meta-analysis (translation: a study that combines data from all previous studies) found that \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamapediatrics/fullarticle/2782796\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">20.5% of children worldwide have symptoms of anxiety\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">This post will help parents address many of your common questions on anxiety, including:\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">How do you know if your child has anxiety?\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">What are the common anxiety disorders in children?\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Is your child’s anxiety your “fault” as a parent?\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">What can you do to help your child?\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">When and how should you seek professional help for your child?\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003ch3>\u003cb>How do you know if your child has anxiety?\u003c/b>\u003c/h3>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">It is very normal for children to have fears that seem irrational or out of proportion to the danger actually posed, such as being afraid of the dark or worried about their parents leaving. However, most children seem to outgrow these fears with age and/or the fears do not interfere with the child’s ability to make friends, go to school, sleep or engage in other activities that are important to the child and the family. Parents should be concerned if the fear or anxiety does not seem typical for their age or if it starts to interfere with important activities for your child, such as sleep, school or important family activities.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Children with anxiety may show some of the following symptoms:\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Complaining of stomach or head problems\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Difficulty falling or staying asleep\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Difficulty concentrating\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Seeming overly tired or on edge\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Excessive worrying\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Avoiding certain things or activities\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Irritability or being more prone to anger\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">It is also important to note that anxiety can look different in children than in adults. For children, it is common that anxiety involves physical complaints (stomachache, headache or being tired or unable to sleep) or looks more like irritability and anger than nervousness. Young children also may not be able to describe their anxious thoughts or even accept that their thoughts are irrational or unreasonable. Older children may know their thoughts are unreasonable but not be able to control them or still feel anxious.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Anxiety in children can include any of the following diagnoses:\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003col>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Generalized anxiety disorder\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">: Children with generalized anxiety disorder show a general pattern of anxiety that is not specific to a particular object or event. They worry constantly about a variety of topics and show physical signs of anxiety, such as stomaches or a racing heart). Their anxiety is so distressing that it interferes with school and other activities.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Separation anxiety disorder:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Most children don’t like being separated from their primary caregivers but children with separation anxiety disorder show an extreme response to separation that is more intense or lasts longer than other children their age. They may refuse separation or worry that something may happen to the caregiver while they are away.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Social anxiety disorder:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Children with social anxiety disorder are very afraid of social situations. Older children may be very worried about being judged or viewed negatively by others. This could result in school avoidance or avoiding other types of social situations.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Panic disorder:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Panic disorder is diagnosed when children have regular, unpredictable panic attacks and have a persistent worry about having another one. A panic attack may involve a sudden feeling of heart pounding, trouble breathing, dizziness or feeling shaky and sweaty.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Specific phobias:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> A specific phobia is strong fear about a particular situation or object. These fears are so intense that they cause extreme distress and/or stop the child from going places or doing things they want to do. Common examples include going to the doctor or dentist, dogs, thunderstorms and vomit.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Selective mutism\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">: Selective mutism occurs when children have trouble talking or refuse to talk in situations that are new or uncomfortable for them. They do not have trouble communicating with familiar people in familiar situations but they only have trouble talking in anxiety-provoking situations.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ol>\n\u003ch3>\u003cb>Is your child’s anxiety your “fault” as a parent?\u003c/b>\u003c/h3>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">A\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://weiszlab.fas.harvard.edu/files/jweisz/files/mcleod_wood_weisz_2007_clinc_psych_rev_anxiety.pdf\"> \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">meta-analysis\u003c/span>\u003c/a> \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">(translation: a study which combines data from all previous studies on the topic) found that only 4% of the variance in child anxiety is related to parenting. This means that most cases of childhood anxiety are \u003c/span>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">not \u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">caused or made worse by parenting. For most children, there is nothing you did or did not do to cause your child’s anxiety.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">However, just because parenting is unlikely to have caused anxiety, it does not mean that there is nothing you can do to help your child learn how to cope with anxiety or reduce their experience of anxiety.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch3>\u003cb>What can I do to help my child?\u003c/b>\u003c/h3>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Research finds that parents may play a clear role in helping their child to cope with anxiety. In fact, a \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30851397/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">recent study\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> found that training parents in effective ways to manage their child’s anxiety was just as effective in reducing anxiety symptoms as direct child therapy.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">So what can you do to help your anxious child, according to research?\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003col>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Explain what anxiety is and take away the shame:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Explain to your child that there is nothing wrong with them and that anxiety itself is not “bad”— anxiety is there to protect them. You can describe their brain as being more likely to have “false alarms” meaning their brain is telling them there is danger when really they are safe. Explain that this happens to everyone and maybe even give an example of when it happened to you as a child or an adult.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>When your child is anxious, avoid any “accommodating behaviors”:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Be careful not to provide too much reassurance or help the child to avoid what makes them anxious. These are called “accommodating behaviors” by psychologists. Many well-intentioned parents of anxious children get in the pattern of shielding their child or avoiding anything that might trigger anxiety. Yet, we know from\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3932435/\"> \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">research\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> that avoiding anxiety-provoking events only makes anxiety worse and keeps the child reliant on their parents coping with the situation for them so they don’t learn skills for coping with their anxiety independently. It also reinforces that the situation is something they should be afraid of (since even their parents seem worried) and communicates to children that they are not capable of handling it on their own. Examples can include always speaking for a shy child, answering repetitive questions when a child is worried about something or avoiding events that might make your child anxious.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Validate and empathize with anxiety:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> At the same time, parents also do not want to ignore or invalidate their child’s anxiety. They should acknowledge that the child’s anxiety is “real” and is difficult for them, even if it seems irrational to the parent. For example: “I can tell that was really scary for you.”\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Encourage children to face their fears:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> After acknowledging and empathizing with their child’s anxiety, parents should then encourage them to gradually and gently face their fears. Parents should work with their children to take “baby steps” to facing their fears. For example: “This really makes you feel nervous but I know you can handle it.”\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Praise any “brave” behavior:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> When children successfully face their fears or even when they take a “baby step” toward facing their fears, parents should give children a lot of praise and positive attention. When doing this, parents should acknowledge that the child was anxious and that it was very difficult but they did it anyway, rather than invalidating their experience with something like “See, that wasn’t so bad!”\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Help your child learn to tolerate uncertainty:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Many children and adults with anxiety will try to avoid anxiety by reducing uncertainty in their environment. Help your child to face uncertainty and learn to tolerate uncertainty by gradually exposing them to more uncertainty in their environment. This could include not answering repetitive questions, packing them a slightly different snack every day, trying out new activities even if they are nervous, driving a different way to school or changing the order of a routine.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Encourage your child’s independence and ability to make choices on their own\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">: Allow your child the freedom to make mistakes, take risks and even make the “wrong” decision.\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://weiszlab.fas.harvard.edu/files/jweisz/files/mcleod_wood_weisz_2007_clinc_psych_rev_anxiety.pdf\"> \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Research\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> finds that parents who are overly controlling are more likely to have a child with anxiety. Although this parenting practice could reflect the parents’ anxiety themselves, it also makes sense that this behavior may hurt children’s confidence.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ol>\n\u003ch3>\u003cb>When and how do I seek professional help?\u003c/b>\u003c/h3>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Although parents can certainly help their children to cope with anxiety, it is also important to seek professional help when needed for childhood anxiety.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">How do you know if you need to seek help? Parents should seek help for any of the following reasons:\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Their child’s anxiety seems to be interfering with important functions such as sleep, eating, school or activities that they used to enjoy\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The strategies they are trying to manage their child’s anxiety don’t seem to be helping or are making the anxiety worse\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The child has been exposed to a traumatic situation which is causing anxiety\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The child’s anxiety seems to be getting worse over time\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">If you do think your child needs professional help, ask your pediatrician or school counselor for a referral to a psychologist, doctor or other mental health professional. They may conduct an evaluation, which will likely involve some questionnaires and talking to you and your child about their symptoms. After the evaluation, you will be told whether your child meets criteria for an anxiety disorder and what your treatment options might be.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Therapy and medication are very effective for treating childhood anxiety. In particular,\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/NEJMoa0804633\"> \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">a type of therapy called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) helps most children with anxiety show improvement in symptoms\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">.\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10567-019-00303-2\"> \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Research\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> also finds that therapy with “in-session exposure” (translation: exposing children to what makes them anxious during the therapy session) may help to improve anxiety symptoms. Parents can ask providers whether they have been trained in CBT and use exposure in their sessions in order to determine if their approach is backed by research.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ci>Cara Goodwin, PhD, is a licensed psychologist, a mother of four and the founder of \u003ca href=\"https://parentingtranslator.substack.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Parenting Translator\u003c/a>, a nonprofit newsletter that turns scientific research into information that is accurate, relevant and useful for parents.\u003c/i>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cem>This post was \u003ca href=\"https://parentingtranslator.substack.com/p/how-to-help-your-anxious-child\">originally published\u003c/a> by Parenting Translator. Sign up for \u003ca href=\"https://parentingtranslator.substack.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">the newsletter\u003c/a> and follow Parenting Translator \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/parentingtranslator/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">on Instagram\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Anxiety disorders are the most common mental health concern in children. The rates of children with anxiety have been growing dramatically. In 2021, a meta-analysis (translation: a study that combines data from all previous studies) found that \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamapediatrics/fullarticle/2782796\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">20.5% of children worldwide have symptoms of anxiety\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">This post will help parents address many of your common questions on anxiety, including:\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">How do you know if your child has anxiety?\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">What are the common anxiety disorders in children?\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Is your child’s anxiety your “fault” as a parent?\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">What can you do to help your child?\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">When and how should you seek professional help for your child?\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003ch3>\u003cb>How do you know if your child has anxiety?\u003c/b>\u003c/h3>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">It is very normal for children to have fears that seem irrational or out of proportion to the danger actually posed, such as being afraid of the dark or worried about their parents leaving. However, most children seem to outgrow these fears with age and/or the fears do not interfere with the child’s ability to make friends, go to school, sleep or engage in other activities that are important to the child and the family. Parents should be concerned if the fear or anxiety does not seem typical for their age or if it starts to interfere with important activities for your child, such as sleep, school or important family activities.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Children with anxiety may show some of the following symptoms:\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Complaining of stomach or head problems\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Difficulty falling or staying asleep\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Difficulty concentrating\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Seeming overly tired or on edge\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Excessive worrying\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Avoiding certain things or activities\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Irritability or being more prone to anger\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">It is also important to note that anxiety can look different in children than in adults. For children, it is common that anxiety involves physical complaints (stomachache, headache or being tired or unable to sleep) or looks more like irritability and anger than nervousness. Young children also may not be able to describe their anxious thoughts or even accept that their thoughts are irrational or unreasonable. Older children may know their thoughts are unreasonable but not be able to control them or still feel anxious.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Anxiety in children can include any of the following diagnoses:\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003col>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Generalized anxiety disorder\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">: Children with generalized anxiety disorder show a general pattern of anxiety that is not specific to a particular object or event. They worry constantly about a variety of topics and show physical signs of anxiety, such as stomaches or a racing heart). Their anxiety is so distressing that it interferes with school and other activities.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Separation anxiety disorder:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Most children don’t like being separated from their primary caregivers but children with separation anxiety disorder show an extreme response to separation that is more intense or lasts longer than other children their age. They may refuse separation or worry that something may happen to the caregiver while they are away.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Social anxiety disorder:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Children with social anxiety disorder are very afraid of social situations. Older children may be very worried about being judged or viewed negatively by others. This could result in school avoidance or avoiding other types of social situations.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Panic disorder:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Panic disorder is diagnosed when children have regular, unpredictable panic attacks and have a persistent worry about having another one. A panic attack may involve a sudden feeling of heart pounding, trouble breathing, dizziness or feeling shaky and sweaty.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Specific phobias:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> A specific phobia is strong fear about a particular situation or object. These fears are so intense that they cause extreme distress and/or stop the child from going places or doing things they want to do. Common examples include going to the doctor or dentist, dogs, thunderstorms and vomit.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Selective mutism\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">: Selective mutism occurs when children have trouble talking or refuse to talk in situations that are new or uncomfortable for them. They do not have trouble communicating with familiar people in familiar situations but they only have trouble talking in anxiety-provoking situations.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ol>\n\u003ch3>\u003cb>Is your child’s anxiety your “fault” as a parent?\u003c/b>\u003c/h3>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">A\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://weiszlab.fas.harvard.edu/files/jweisz/files/mcleod_wood_weisz_2007_clinc_psych_rev_anxiety.pdf\"> \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">meta-analysis\u003c/span>\u003c/a> \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">(translation: a study which combines data from all previous studies on the topic) found that only 4% of the variance in child anxiety is related to parenting. This means that most cases of childhood anxiety are \u003c/span>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">not \u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">caused or made worse by parenting. For most children, there is nothing you did or did not do to cause your child’s anxiety.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">However, just because parenting is unlikely to have caused anxiety, it does not mean that there is nothing you can do to help your child learn how to cope with anxiety or reduce their experience of anxiety.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch3>\u003cb>What can I do to help my child?\u003c/b>\u003c/h3>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Research finds that parents may play a clear role in helping their child to cope with anxiety. In fact, a \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30851397/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">recent study\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> found that training parents in effective ways to manage their child’s anxiety was just as effective in reducing anxiety symptoms as direct child therapy.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">So what can you do to help your anxious child, according to research?\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003col>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Explain what anxiety is and take away the shame:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Explain to your child that there is nothing wrong with them and that anxiety itself is not “bad”— anxiety is there to protect them. You can describe their brain as being more likely to have “false alarms” meaning their brain is telling them there is danger when really they are safe. Explain that this happens to everyone and maybe even give an example of when it happened to you as a child or an adult.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>When your child is anxious, avoid any “accommodating behaviors”:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Be careful not to provide too much reassurance or help the child to avoid what makes them anxious. These are called “accommodating behaviors” by psychologists. Many well-intentioned parents of anxious children get in the pattern of shielding their child or avoiding anything that might trigger anxiety. Yet, we know from\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3932435/\"> \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">research\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> that avoiding anxiety-provoking events only makes anxiety worse and keeps the child reliant on their parents coping with the situation for them so they don’t learn skills for coping with their anxiety independently. It also reinforces that the situation is something they should be afraid of (since even their parents seem worried) and communicates to children that they are not capable of handling it on their own. Examples can include always speaking for a shy child, answering repetitive questions when a child is worried about something or avoiding events that might make your child anxious.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Validate and empathize with anxiety:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> At the same time, parents also do not want to ignore or invalidate their child’s anxiety. They should acknowledge that the child’s anxiety is “real” and is difficult for them, even if it seems irrational to the parent. For example: “I can tell that was really scary for you.”\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Encourage children to face their fears:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> After acknowledging and empathizing with their child’s anxiety, parents should then encourage them to gradually and gently face their fears. Parents should work with their children to take “baby steps” to facing their fears. For example: “This really makes you feel nervous but I know you can handle it.”\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Praise any “brave” behavior:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> When children successfully face their fears or even when they take a “baby step” toward facing their fears, parents should give children a lot of praise and positive attention. When doing this, parents should acknowledge that the child was anxious and that it was very difficult but they did it anyway, rather than invalidating their experience with something like “See, that wasn’t so bad!”\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Help your child learn to tolerate uncertainty:\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Many children and adults with anxiety will try to avoid anxiety by reducing uncertainty in their environment. Help your child to face uncertainty and learn to tolerate uncertainty by gradually exposing them to more uncertainty in their environment. This could include not answering repetitive questions, packing them a slightly different snack every day, trying out new activities even if they are nervous, driving a different way to school or changing the order of a routine.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cb>Encourage your child’s independence and ability to make choices on their own\u003c/b>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">: Allow your child the freedom to make mistakes, take risks and even make the “wrong” decision.\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://weiszlab.fas.harvard.edu/files/jweisz/files/mcleod_wood_weisz_2007_clinc_psych_rev_anxiety.pdf\"> \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Research\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> finds that parents who are overly controlling are more likely to have a child with anxiety. Although this parenting practice could reflect the parents’ anxiety themselves, it also makes sense that this behavior may hurt children’s confidence.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ol>\n\u003ch3>\u003cb>When and how do I seek professional help?\u003c/b>\u003c/h3>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Although parents can certainly help their children to cope with anxiety, it is also important to seek professional help when needed for childhood anxiety.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">How do you know if you need to seek help? Parents should seek help for any of the following reasons:\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Their child’s anxiety seems to be interfering with important functions such as sleep, eating, school or activities that they used to enjoy\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The strategies they are trying to manage their child’s anxiety don’t seem to be helping or are making the anxiety worse\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The child has been exposed to a traumatic situation which is causing anxiety\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The child’s anxiety seems to be getting worse over time\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">If you do think your child needs professional help, ask your pediatrician or school counselor for a referral to a psychologist, doctor or other mental health professional. They may conduct an evaluation, which will likely involve some questionnaires and talking to you and your child about their symptoms. After the evaluation, you will be told whether your child meets criteria for an anxiety disorder and what your treatment options might be.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Therapy and medication are very effective for treating childhood anxiety. In particular,\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/NEJMoa0804633\"> \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">a type of therapy called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) helps most children with anxiety show improvement in symptoms\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">.\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10567-019-00303-2\"> \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Research\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> also finds that therapy with “in-session exposure” (translation: exposing children to what makes them anxious during the therapy session) may help to improve anxiety symptoms. Parents can ask providers whether they have been trained in CBT and use exposure in their sessions in order to determine if their approach is backed by research.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ci>Cara Goodwin, PhD, is a licensed psychologist, a mother of four and the founder of \u003ca href=\"https://parentingtranslator.substack.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Parenting Translator\u003c/a>, a nonprofit newsletter that turns scientific research into information that is accurate, relevant and useful for parents.\u003c/i>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">In education circles, it’s popular to rail against testing, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61712/do-math-drills-help-children-learn\">especially timed exams\u003c/a>. Tests are stressful and not the best way to measure knowledge, wrote Adam Grant, an organizational psychologist at the University of Pennsylvania’s Wharton School in a Sept. 20, 2023 \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.nytimes.com/2023/09/20/opinion/culture/timed-tests-biased-kids.html\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">New York Times essay\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. “You wouldn’t want a surgeon who rushes through a craniectomy, or an accountant who dashes through your taxes.” \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">It’s tempting to agree. But there’s another side to the testing story, with a lot of evidence behind it. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Cognitive scientists argue that testing improves learning. They call it “practice retrieval” or “test-enhanced learning.” In layman’s language, that means that \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60868/many-students-are-using-study-strategies-that-dont-work-and-better-options-exist\">the brain learns new information and skills by being forced to recall them periodically\u003c/a>. Remembering consolidates information and helps the brain form long-term memories. Of course, testing is not the only way to accomplish this, but it’s easy and efficient in a classroom. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Several meta-analyses, which summarize the evidence from many studies, have found \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Fbul0000309\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">higher achievement when students take quizzes\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> instead of, say, reviewing notes or rereading a book chapter. “There’s decades and decades of research showing that taking practice tests will actually improve your learning,” said \u003ca href=\"https://www.ucl.ac.uk/brain-sciences/people/professor-david-shanks\">David Shanks\u003c/a>, a professor of psychology and deputy dean of the Faculty of Brain Sciences at University College London. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Still, many students get \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60905/theres-no-such-thing-as-a-bad-test-taker-but-anxiety-is-real\">overwhelmed during tests\u003c/a>. Shanks and a team of four researchers wanted to find out whether quizzes exacerbate test anxiety. The team collected 24 studies that measured students’ test anxiety and found that, on average, practice tests and quizzes not only improved academic achievement, but also ended up reducing test anxiety. Their \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10648-023-09801-w\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">meta-analysis was published in Educational Psychology Review\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> in August 2023. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Shanks says quizzes can be a “gentle” way to help students face challenges. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“It’s not like being thrown into the deep end of a swimming pool,” said Shanks. “It’s like being put very gently into the shallow end. And then the next time a little bit deeper, and then a little bit deeper. And so the possibility of becoming properly afraid just never arises.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Why test anxiety diminishes is unclear. It could be because students are learning to tolerate testing conditions through repeated exposure, as Shanks described. Or it could be because quizzes are helping students master the material and perform better on the final exam. We tend to be less anxious about things we’re good at. Unfortunately, the underlying studies didn’t collect the data that could resolve this academic debate.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Shanks doesn’t think competency alone reduces test anxiety. “We know that many high achieving students get very anxious,” he said. “So it can’t just be that your anxiety goes down as your performance goes up.” \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">To minimize test anxiety, Shanks advises that practice tests be low stakes, either ungraded or ones that students can retake multiple times. He also suggests gamified quizzes to make tests more fun and entertaining. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Some of this advice is controversial. Many education experts argue against timed spelling tests or multiplication quizzes, but Shanks recommends both. “We would strongly speculate that there is both a learning benefit from those tests and a beneficial impact on anxiety,” he said. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Shanks said a lot more research is needed. Many of the 24 existing studies were small experiments and of uneven quality, and measuring test anxiety through surveys is an inexact science. The underlying studies covered a range of school subjects, from math and science to foreign languages, and took place in both classrooms and laboratory settings, studying students as young as third grade and as old as college. Nearly half the studies took place in the United States with the remainder in the United Kingdom, Malaysia, Nigeria, Iran, Brazil, the Netherlands, China, Singapore and Pakistan. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Shanks cautioned that this meta-analysis should not be seen as a “definitive” pronouncement that tests reduce anxiety, but rather as a summary of early research in a field that is still in its “infancy.” One big issue is that the studies measured average test anxiety for students. There may be a small minority of students who are particularly sensitive to test anxiety and who may be harmed by practice tests. These differences could be the subject of future research. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Another issue is the tradeoff between boosting achievement and reducing anxiety. The harder the practice test, the more beneficial it is for learning. But the lower the stakes for a quiz, the better it is for reducing anxiety. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Shanks dreams of finding a Goldilocks “sweet spot” where “the stakes are not so high that the test begins to provoke anxiety, but the stakes are just high enough to get the full benefit of the testing effect. We’re miles away from having firm answers to subtle questions like that.” \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">This story about \u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/proof-points-lowering-test-anxiety-in-the-classroom/\">\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">test anxiety\u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> was written by Jill Barshay and produced by \u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/special-reports/higher-education/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The Hechinger Report\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, a nonprofit, independent news organization focused on inequality and innovation in education. Sign up for \u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/proofpoints/\">\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Proof Points\u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> and other \u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/newsletters/\">\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Hechinger newsletters\u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">In education circles, it’s popular to rail against testing, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61712/do-math-drills-help-children-learn\">especially timed exams\u003c/a>. Tests are stressful and not the best way to measure knowledge, wrote Adam Grant, an organizational psychologist at the University of Pennsylvania’s Wharton School in a Sept. 20, 2023 \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.nytimes.com/2023/09/20/opinion/culture/timed-tests-biased-kids.html\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">New York Times essay\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. “You wouldn’t want a surgeon who rushes through a craniectomy, or an accountant who dashes through your taxes.” \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">It’s tempting to agree. But there’s another side to the testing story, with a lot of evidence behind it. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Cognitive scientists argue that testing improves learning. They call it “practice retrieval” or “test-enhanced learning.” In layman’s language, that means that \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60868/many-students-are-using-study-strategies-that-dont-work-and-better-options-exist\">the brain learns new information and skills by being forced to recall them periodically\u003c/a>. Remembering consolidates information and helps the brain form long-term memories. Of course, testing is not the only way to accomplish this, but it’s easy and efficient in a classroom. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Several meta-analyses, which summarize the evidence from many studies, have found \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Fbul0000309\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">higher achievement when students take quizzes\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> instead of, say, reviewing notes or rereading a book chapter. “There’s decades and decades of research showing that taking practice tests will actually improve your learning,” said \u003ca href=\"https://www.ucl.ac.uk/brain-sciences/people/professor-david-shanks\">David Shanks\u003c/a>, a professor of psychology and deputy dean of the Faculty of Brain Sciences at University College London. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Still, many students get \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60905/theres-no-such-thing-as-a-bad-test-taker-but-anxiety-is-real\">overwhelmed during tests\u003c/a>. Shanks and a team of four researchers wanted to find out whether quizzes exacerbate test anxiety. The team collected 24 studies that measured students’ test anxiety and found that, on average, practice tests and quizzes not only improved academic achievement, but also ended up reducing test anxiety. Their \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10648-023-09801-w\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">meta-analysis was published in Educational Psychology Review\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> in August 2023. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Shanks says quizzes can be a “gentle” way to help students face challenges. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“It’s not like being thrown into the deep end of a swimming pool,” said Shanks. “It’s like being put very gently into the shallow end. And then the next time a little bit deeper, and then a little bit deeper. And so the possibility of becoming properly afraid just never arises.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Why test anxiety diminishes is unclear. It could be because students are learning to tolerate testing conditions through repeated exposure, as Shanks described. Or it could be because quizzes are helping students master the material and perform better on the final exam. We tend to be less anxious about things we’re good at. Unfortunately, the underlying studies didn’t collect the data that could resolve this academic debate.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Shanks doesn’t think competency alone reduces test anxiety. “We know that many high achieving students get very anxious,” he said. “So it can’t just be that your anxiety goes down as your performance goes up.” \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">To minimize test anxiety, Shanks advises that practice tests be low stakes, either ungraded or ones that students can retake multiple times. He also suggests gamified quizzes to make tests more fun and entertaining. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Some of this advice is controversial. Many education experts argue against timed spelling tests or multiplication quizzes, but Shanks recommends both. “We would strongly speculate that there is both a learning benefit from those tests and a beneficial impact on anxiety,” he said. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Shanks said a lot more research is needed. Many of the 24 existing studies were small experiments and of uneven quality, and measuring test anxiety through surveys is an inexact science. The underlying studies covered a range of school subjects, from math and science to foreign languages, and took place in both classrooms and laboratory settings, studying students as young as third grade and as old as college. Nearly half the studies took place in the United States with the remainder in the United Kingdom, Malaysia, Nigeria, Iran, Brazil, the Netherlands, China, Singapore and Pakistan. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Shanks cautioned that this meta-analysis should not be seen as a “definitive” pronouncement that tests reduce anxiety, but rather as a summary of early research in a field that is still in its “infancy.” One big issue is that the studies measured average test anxiety for students. There may be a small minority of students who are particularly sensitive to test anxiety and who may be harmed by practice tests. These differences could be the subject of future research. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Another issue is the tradeoff between boosting achievement and reducing anxiety. The harder the practice test, the more beneficial it is for learning. But the lower the stakes for a quiz, the better it is for reducing anxiety. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Shanks dreams of finding a Goldilocks “sweet spot” where “the stakes are not so high that the test begins to provoke anxiety, but the stakes are just high enough to get the full benefit of the testing effect. We’re miles away from having firm answers to subtle questions like that.” \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">This story about \u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/proof-points-lowering-test-anxiety-in-the-classroom/\">\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">test anxiety\u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> was written by Jill Barshay and produced by \u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/special-reports/higher-education/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The Hechinger Report\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, a nonprofit, independent news organization focused on inequality and innovation in education. Sign up for \u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/proofpoints/\">\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Proof Points\u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> and other \u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/newsletters/\">\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Hechinger newsletters\u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"title": "4 Parenting Priorities to Prevent Mental Health 'Summer Slide'",
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"content": "\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">With school on break, along with all the homework, tests and \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/59625/three-reasons-teens-need-later-school-start-times\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">early start times\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> that come with it, parents often assume that young people’s stress and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61186/what-parents-need-to-know-about-their-teens-mental-health\">anxiety\u003c/a> will take a pause as well. However, that’s not always the case, especially as the novelty of summer dwindles. \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Without the daily structure of school and extracurricular activities, kids may struggle with boredom or restlessness. “Summer for many of us can feel like this nebulous thing because it is just this endless free time. Additionally, the pressure to make the most of the summer break and fear of missing out on experiences can contribute to feelings of anxiety. That ambiguity spikes a lot of fear and concern,” said Miriam Stevenson, who is an executive director at \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.caresolace.org/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Care Solace\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, a company that helps schools connect families with mental health services. \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Previously she worked as the director of student services for health and wellness in the Palo Alto Unified School District.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Stevenson said that while Care Solace receives fewer summertime referrals, it’s not because there is less need. It’s because students aren’t at school with extra adult eyes and ears to check in on them. “There’s one less node in our safety net,” she said. When schools succeed at creating \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61775/how-important-was-your-favorite-teacher-to-your-success-researchers-have-done-the-math\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">a sense of belonging\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, they can be a comforting routine for students or a safe place where they feel socially connected. Stevenson offered advice for \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61186/what-parents-need-to-know-about-their-teens-mental-health\">parents looking to support their kids’ mental health\u003c/a> over the summer and equip them with the tools to embrace joy, conquer challenges and flourish.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>More free time doesn’t have to mean more screen time\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">With more free time on their hands, it’s easy for kids to get sucked into endless hours of \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/59094/does-my-kid-have-a-tech-addiction\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">screen usage\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, especially because kids are also using their devices to connect with friends that they’re no longer seeing at school everyday. An advisory from the U.S. Surgeon General \u003ca href=\"https://ojjdp.ojp.gov/news/juvjust/us-surgeon-general-issues-advisory-social-media-and-youth-mental-health\">recently warned\u003c/a> that “frequent social media use can contribute to poor mental health.” One study cited in the \u003ca href=\"https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/sg-youth-mental-health-social-media-advisory.pdf\">advisory \u003c/a>\u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">found that adolescents who spent over three hours per day on social media were twice as likely to have \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60788/3-reasons-why-seattle-schools-are-suing-big-tech-over-a-youth-mental-health-crisis\">negative mental health outcomes\u003c/a>, such as depression and anxiety symptoms. “Not all young people are good at setting their own boundaries and they might need you to be the bad guy,” said Stevenson.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The first thing parents can do to limit screen time is to \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60436/when-parents-practice-good-screen-habits-it-rubs-off-on-the-whole-family\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">lead by example with their own devices\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. “They’re going to do what we do, not what we tell them to do,” added Stevenson. By modeling moderation and offering alternatives that get kids moving and exploring, parents can make a well-rounded summer seem more attainable. Summer is an opportunity to be present with one another as a family, said Stevenson. “Have technology-free times together or meals together — moments where there isn’t a screen that’s interfering with your ability to connect,” she suggested. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Additionally, parents can give their children a screen time budget. “They get to decide how they want to use the amount of screen time that they have,” said Stevenson. “That gives them some autonomy and choice.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>The power of a summer schedule\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Maintaining a routine during the summer can be a powerful tool for supporting children’s mental health, and parents can play a crucial role in establishing and reinforcing this structure. Stevenson encouraged parents to proactively determine a schedule with kids, including \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60543/what-parents-need-to-monitor-about-teens-sleep-beyond-the-hour-count\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">bedtimes and wake-up times\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. “There’s great freedom in the summer to allow us to go to our natural circadian rhythms. And unfortunately, as lovely as that might be, it’s going to make waking up early harder when they come back [to school],” said Stevenson. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.cdc.gov/sleep/about_sleep/sleep_hygiene.html\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Consistent sleep patterns\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> can improve sleep health, which is closely \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://publications.aap.org/aapnews/news/13792?autologincheck=redirected\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">linked to children’s mental health and wellbeing\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. “If you don’t have morning routines or evening routines as a family, the summer is a good time to experiment,” Stevenson said. Creating a daily schedule that includes dedicated time for physical activity, reading, hobbies and socializing can provide a sense of stability and purpose.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“Just because school’s out doesn’t mean learning stops. In fact, it’s the best time to learn because you have the sole choice over what you get to be curious, pursue or inquire about,” she added. Outside of the hustle and bustle of the school year, parents can encourage kids to think about how they’re contributing to their community, which can look like setting the table each night, visiting older relatives or volunteering locally. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>Open communication can help parents recognize warning signs\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">It can be difficult to identify signs that a kid is struggling with mental health, especially if they are older. Although resources with lists of warning signs exist, they can often read like teenagers being teenagers, Stevenson said. “They’re emotional. They’re volatile. They’re withdrawn. They like to sleep all day.” Instead of scrutinizing every potential symptom, Stevenson suggested parents keep an eye on significant changes in behavior, mood, eating and sleep habits. “Trust that you know your kid,” she said. “You know what their baseline is.” Additionally, parents can establish a daily check-in with their child, such as a text asking how they’re doing or a designated time in the evening to share highs and lows from the day.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">If parents notice warning signs of poor mental health, \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61186/what-parents-need-to-know-about-their-teens-mental-health\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">open and honest communication\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> is vital. Engaging in supportive conversations with their child, expressing concern and actively listening without judgment can create a safe space for them to share their feelings. “Listen and stay in that moment and just let them express themselves. Show them that you can hold very difficult feelings,” said Stevenson. If parents feel out of their depth, they can seek professional help from a pediatrician, therapist or counselor. “Summer can present a lot of great opportunities for intensive mental health support or starting with a therapist,” she added.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>Knowledge is power when it comes to school-year fear\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">At the beginning of the summer, going back to school may be the farthest thing from kids’ minds. But as the school start date gets closer, parents might start to see anxiety levels rise, said Stevenson. “Anytime you’re going to have \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/58462/how-to-help-anxious-students-re-adjust-to-social-settings\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">a transition or there’s an unknown\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, there’s going to be an increase in worry. And if you’re already predisposed or struggling with anxiety, it’s going to exacerbate the challenges that you’re facing,” she said.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Parents can work with kids to find out as much information about the next school year as possible in order to dispel any fear of the future. This is especially helpful when kids are starting at a new school either because of a grade change or a recent move. Parents may encourage students to visit school and see where their classes will be or talk to their friends to see if they will be in the same classes. “As much information as they can have about what their day is going to look like and who they’re going to be with is really helpful,” said Stevenson. Additionally, parents can identify any orientation programs that the school may provide.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Kids’ mental health needs persist past the end of the school year and through the summer. Embracing this opportunity to reset and focus on mental well-being can set the stage for a fulfilling summer experience and confident start to the new school year.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">With school on break, along with all the homework, tests and \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/59625/three-reasons-teens-need-later-school-start-times\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">early start times\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> that come with it, parents often assume that young people’s stress and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61186/what-parents-need-to-know-about-their-teens-mental-health\">anxiety\u003c/a> will take a pause as well. However, that’s not always the case, especially as the novelty of summer dwindles. \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Without the daily structure of school and extracurricular activities, kids may struggle with boredom or restlessness. “Summer for many of us can feel like this nebulous thing because it is just this endless free time. Additionally, the pressure to make the most of the summer break and fear of missing out on experiences can contribute to feelings of anxiety. That ambiguity spikes a lot of fear and concern,” said Miriam Stevenson, who is an executive director at \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.caresolace.org/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Care Solace\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, a company that helps schools connect families with mental health services. \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Previously she worked as the director of student services for health and wellness in the Palo Alto Unified School District.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Stevenson said that while Care Solace receives fewer summertime referrals, it’s not because there is less need. It’s because students aren’t at school with extra adult eyes and ears to check in on them. “There’s one less node in our safety net,” she said. When schools succeed at creating \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61775/how-important-was-your-favorite-teacher-to-your-success-researchers-have-done-the-math\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">a sense of belonging\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, they can be a comforting routine for students or a safe place where they feel socially connected. Stevenson offered advice for \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61186/what-parents-need-to-know-about-their-teens-mental-health\">parents looking to support their kids’ mental health\u003c/a> over the summer and equip them with the tools to embrace joy, conquer challenges and flourish.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>More free time doesn’t have to mean more screen time\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">With more free time on their hands, it’s easy for kids to get sucked into endless hours of \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/59094/does-my-kid-have-a-tech-addiction\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">screen usage\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, especially because kids are also using their devices to connect with friends that they’re no longer seeing at school everyday. An advisory from the U.S. Surgeon General \u003ca href=\"https://ojjdp.ojp.gov/news/juvjust/us-surgeon-general-issues-advisory-social-media-and-youth-mental-health\">recently warned\u003c/a> that “frequent social media use can contribute to poor mental health.” One study cited in the \u003ca href=\"https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/sg-youth-mental-health-social-media-advisory.pdf\">advisory \u003c/a>\u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">found that adolescents who spent over three hours per day on social media were twice as likely to have \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60788/3-reasons-why-seattle-schools-are-suing-big-tech-over-a-youth-mental-health-crisis\">negative mental health outcomes\u003c/a>, such as depression and anxiety symptoms. “Not all young people are good at setting their own boundaries and they might need you to be the bad guy,” said Stevenson.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The first thing parents can do to limit screen time is to \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60436/when-parents-practice-good-screen-habits-it-rubs-off-on-the-whole-family\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">lead by example with their own devices\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. “They’re going to do what we do, not what we tell them to do,” added Stevenson. By modeling moderation and offering alternatives that get kids moving and exploring, parents can make a well-rounded summer seem more attainable. Summer is an opportunity to be present with one another as a family, said Stevenson. “Have technology-free times together or meals together — moments where there isn’t a screen that’s interfering with your ability to connect,” she suggested. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Additionally, parents can give their children a screen time budget. “They get to decide how they want to use the amount of screen time that they have,” said Stevenson. “That gives them some autonomy and choice.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>The power of a summer schedule\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Maintaining a routine during the summer can be a powerful tool for supporting children’s mental health, and parents can play a crucial role in establishing and reinforcing this structure. Stevenson encouraged parents to proactively determine a schedule with kids, including \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60543/what-parents-need-to-monitor-about-teens-sleep-beyond-the-hour-count\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">bedtimes and wake-up times\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. “There’s great freedom in the summer to allow us to go to our natural circadian rhythms. And unfortunately, as lovely as that might be, it’s going to make waking up early harder when they come back [to school],” said Stevenson. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.cdc.gov/sleep/about_sleep/sleep_hygiene.html\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Consistent sleep patterns\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> can improve sleep health, which is closely \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://publications.aap.org/aapnews/news/13792?autologincheck=redirected\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">linked to children’s mental health and wellbeing\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. “If you don’t have morning routines or evening routines as a family, the summer is a good time to experiment,” Stevenson said. Creating a daily schedule that includes dedicated time for physical activity, reading, hobbies and socializing can provide a sense of stability and purpose.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“Just because school’s out doesn’t mean learning stops. In fact, it’s the best time to learn because you have the sole choice over what you get to be curious, pursue or inquire about,” she added. Outside of the hustle and bustle of the school year, parents can encourage kids to think about how they’re contributing to their community, which can look like setting the table each night, visiting older relatives or volunteering locally. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>Open communication can help parents recognize warning signs\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">It can be difficult to identify signs that a kid is struggling with mental health, especially if they are older. Although resources with lists of warning signs exist, they can often read like teenagers being teenagers, Stevenson said. “They’re emotional. They’re volatile. They’re withdrawn. They like to sleep all day.” Instead of scrutinizing every potential symptom, Stevenson suggested parents keep an eye on significant changes in behavior, mood, eating and sleep habits. “Trust that you know your kid,” she said. “You know what their baseline is.” Additionally, parents can establish a daily check-in with their child, such as a text asking how they’re doing or a designated time in the evening to share highs and lows from the day.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">If parents notice warning signs of poor mental health, \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61186/what-parents-need-to-know-about-their-teens-mental-health\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">open and honest communication\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> is vital. Engaging in supportive conversations with their child, expressing concern and actively listening without judgment can create a safe space for them to share their feelings. “Listen and stay in that moment and just let them express themselves. Show them that you can hold very difficult feelings,” said Stevenson. If parents feel out of their depth, they can seek professional help from a pediatrician, therapist or counselor. “Summer can present a lot of great opportunities for intensive mental health support or starting with a therapist,” she added.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>Knowledge is power when it comes to school-year fear\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">At the beginning of the summer, going back to school may be the farthest thing from kids’ minds. But as the school start date gets closer, parents might start to see anxiety levels rise, said Stevenson. “Anytime you’re going to have \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/58462/how-to-help-anxious-students-re-adjust-to-social-settings\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">a transition or there’s an unknown\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, there’s going to be an increase in worry. And if you’re already predisposed or struggling with anxiety, it’s going to exacerbate the challenges that you’re facing,” she said.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Parents can work with kids to find out as much information about the next school year as possible in order to dispel any fear of the future. This is especially helpful when kids are starting at a new school either because of a grade change or a recent move. Parents may encourage students to visit school and see where their classes will be or talk to their friends to see if they will be in the same classes. “As much information as they can have about what their day is going to look like and who they’re going to be with is really helpful,” said Stevenson. Additionally, parents can identify any orientation programs that the school may provide.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"headTitle": "What parents need to know about their teens’ mental health | KQED",
"content": "\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Years ago, when I was still coaching high school cross country, a teenage girl skipped up to me after practice with a warning: Don’t count on her to race all the time. If her nerves got too intense before races, she might have to bow out in advance. “I have anxiety!” she explained with a nervous grin.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignright wp-image-61195 size-thumbnail\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/EMOTIONAL-LIVES-OF-TEENAGERS-Cover-flat-160x242.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"160\" height=\"242\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/EMOTIONAL-LIVES-OF-TEENAGERS-Cover-flat-160x242.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/EMOTIONAL-LIVES-OF-TEENAGERS-Cover-flat.jpg 298w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 160px) 100vw, 160px\">I recalled this episode while reading psychologist and author \u003ca href=\"https://drlisadamour.com/bio/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Lisa Damour’s\u003c/a> refreshing new book, \u003ca href=\"https://drlisadamour.com/books/the-emotional-lives-of-teenagers/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">“The Emotional Lives of Teenagers: Raising Connected, Capable, and Compassionate Adolescents.”\u003c/a> Damour’s voice is forceful but comforting, and she uses it here to drive home her central point: Achieving mental health does not mean a life without unhappiness, anguish, anger, worry or self-doubt. Rather, these painful emotional states are an unavoidable feature of being human, especially for young people buzzing with hormones and adjusting to operatic moods prompted by recent rewiring of their brains. To best help their developing teenagers, parents should work to build their self-esteem and then guide them in learning how to express and manage these feelings. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_61194\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\" style=\"max-width: 160px\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"wp-image-61194 size-thumbnail\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174-160x160.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"160\" height=\"160\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174-160x160.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174-800x800.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174-1020x1020.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174-768x768.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174-1536x1536.jpg 1536w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174.jpg 1708w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 160px) 100vw, 160px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Lisa Damour \u003ccite>(Downie Photo/Courtesy of Lisa Damour)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Damour explains how we got to the point of considering unhappiness an aberration from some imaginary blissful norm. To start, advances in antidepressant medications made them safer and more attractive to the masses; she earnestly acknowledges that psychotropic medications improve and sometimes save lives. But prescriptions for Prozac and its medicinal brethren are as ubiquitous today as those for hypertension and cholesterol, making ordinary disappointment seem like a problem in need of a chemical solution. The mental wellness industry, too, \u003ca href=\"https://globalwellnessinstitute.org/industry-research/the-global-wellness-economy-looking-beyond-covid/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">worth about $131 billion globally\u003c/a>, sells the idea that feeling rotten is avoidable (if you purchase just the right eucalyptus oil or bath bomb). Finally, because \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61031/teen-girls-and-lgbtq-youth-plagued-by-violence-and-trauma-survey-says\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">adolescents are in fact gloomier today than they were just ten years ago\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, it’s harder for parents and kids to figure out what distinguishes a legitimate mental health crisis from everyday emotional discomfort.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">On this last point, Damour shares the findings of social psychologist Jonathan Haidt and psychology professor Jean Twenge who are \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://docs.google.com/document/d/1diMvsMeRphUH7E6D1d_J7R6WbDdgnzFHDHPx9HXzR5o/edit\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">sounding the alarm about youth mental health\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">: Just before the start of the COVID-19 pandemic, 44 percent of teenagers reported experiencing anxiety, up from 34 percent about ten years ago; 37 percent felt “persistently sad or hopeless”; 16 percent of teenagers said that they’d developed a suicide plan. Those self-reported findings were matched by increases in hospitalizations for self-harm and a surge in the number of completed suicides, mostly since 2012. New \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.cdc.gov/healthyyouth/data/yrbs/yrbs_data_summary_and_trends.htm\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">findings\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> released by the CDC in February revealed that \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61031/teen-girls-and-lgbtq-youth-plagued-by-violence-and-trauma-survey-says\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">girls and LGBTQ+ youth especially are floundering\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. Whether from what Haidt calls the rise in “\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61026/10-things-to-know-about-how-social-media-affects-teens-brains\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">phone-based childhoods\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">,” creeping \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60498/what-parents-should-know-about-eco-anxiety-and-its-impact-on-todays-teens\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">existential despair\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, or the effect of \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60624/young-adults-are-struggling-with-their-mental-health-is-more-childhood-independence-the-answer\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">too little free and unstructured time\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> — and likely some combination of all these and more — adolescents are struggling today in ways that they weren’t just a decade ago. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">What’s a conscientious parent to do? “One of the most important things we can do for teenagers is help them distinguish between emotions that are uncomfortable (and) emotions that are unmanageable,” Damour told me. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Mothers and fathers should help their young children build authentic self-esteem by celebrating kids’ actions and avoiding effusive praise. Encourage girls and boys to be of service to others, not only to interrupt their solipsistic mindset, but also to reinforce their ability to make a difference. Next, urge them to develop an interest that’s unrelated to school or college applications, like cooking or knitting. Indulging an intrinsic interest is protective of kids’ feelings of self-worth. Finally, get going on these pursuits before a child reaches middle school, when even the healthiest child might falter. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The best thing parents can do after this is help their children learn both to express and regulate their emotions. Articulating painful feelings robs the feelings of their power, and learning how to manage them restores kids’ self-control.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">To encourage open expression, \u003c/span>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">listen\u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, Damour advises. Be curious about your child’s state of mind. Ask your child to be as verbally precise as possible. Then, repeat back what your child says in her moment of sorrow or fear to demonstrate that you genuinely understand. Once they’ve expressed their heartache, try capturing their hurt in a one-sentence summary — like the editor who creates a headline for a story — and show empathy in return. “Listening attentively and then offering empathy shows them that they are doing exactly the right thing when they seek relief by finding a loving listener (that would be us!) and sharing what’s on their mind,” Damour writes. Above all, defy the temptation to jump in with creative solutions, as irresistible as that may seem.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">For the teenager who resists face-to-face conversations, try other ways of inviting communication. Some children will respond to gentle text messages from parents. Others will be more talkative if they’re strapped into the back seat of the car, spared the awkwardness of direct eye contact. And if parents want their teenagers to talk, they might have to be around more often so that it can happen \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.washingtonpost.com/parenting/2023/02/21/teen-talks-night-parents/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">when the kids are conversational\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. Though they can be mercurial and ornery, teenagers typically like their parents and feel safer when they know where the grown-ups are. Another way to invite emotional expression: Own up to your own mistakes. For example, if you’ve gossiped to a friend about something personal your child has shared with you, and he learns of it, correct your blunder the right way: Apologize for violating his confidence, explain why you did, take responsibility, vow never to blab again, offer to make amends and ask for forgiveness. Because emotional expression is so essential to adolescents’ (and adults’) well-being, parents need to safeguard their kids’ trust. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">After they’ve exhausted their efforts to spur expression, parents can help children learn to self-regulate. Suggest a distraction to interrupt unpleasant rumination. Offer them small comforts tailored to their preferences. \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60543/what-parents-need-to-monitor-about-teens-sleep-beyond-the-hour-count\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Check in on their sleep habits\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> and help them reclaim the eight to ten hours they need. When offering advice, tread lightly: Ask if it’s wanted and approach solutions jointly. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Some children experiencing protracted and irrational sadness and worry need more than a parent or guardian can provide. “I have so much empathy for parents who are trying to figure out if a meltdown is a sign of typical and expectable stress or a sign of a mental health concern,” Damour said. Adults would be wise to seek professional help if their adolescent’s feelings “don’t add up,” or they can’t manage them constructively, or they resort to risky coping strategies. But remember that zig-zagging, capacious feelings are not something to be avoided or feared. “Distress is part of life, and it certainly comes with the territory for teenagers,” she said.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Years ago, when I was still coaching high school cross country, a teenage girl skipped up to me after practice with a warning: Don’t count on her to race all the time. If her nerves got too intense before races, she might have to bow out in advance. “I have anxiety!” she explained with a nervous grin.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignright wp-image-61195 size-thumbnail\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/EMOTIONAL-LIVES-OF-TEENAGERS-Cover-flat-160x242.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"160\" height=\"242\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/EMOTIONAL-LIVES-OF-TEENAGERS-Cover-flat-160x242.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/EMOTIONAL-LIVES-OF-TEENAGERS-Cover-flat.jpg 298w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 160px) 100vw, 160px\">I recalled this episode while reading psychologist and author \u003ca href=\"https://drlisadamour.com/bio/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Lisa Damour’s\u003c/a> refreshing new book, \u003ca href=\"https://drlisadamour.com/books/the-emotional-lives-of-teenagers/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">“The Emotional Lives of Teenagers: Raising Connected, Capable, and Compassionate Adolescents.”\u003c/a> Damour’s voice is forceful but comforting, and she uses it here to drive home her central point: Achieving mental health does not mean a life without unhappiness, anguish, anger, worry or self-doubt. Rather, these painful emotional states are an unavoidable feature of being human, especially for young people buzzing with hormones and adjusting to operatic moods prompted by recent rewiring of their brains. To best help their developing teenagers, parents should work to build their self-esteem and then guide them in learning how to express and manage these feelings. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_61194\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\" style=\"max-width: 160px\">\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"wp-image-61194 size-thumbnail\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174-160x160.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"160\" height=\"160\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174-160x160.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174-800x800.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174-1020x1020.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174-768x768.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174-1536x1536.jpg 1536w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2023/03/DAMOUR-Headshot-Small-File-by-Downie-Photo-scaled-e1678251227174.jpg 1708w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 160px) 100vw, 160px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Lisa Damour \u003ccite>(Downie Photo/Courtesy of Lisa Damour)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Damour explains how we got to the point of considering unhappiness an aberration from some imaginary blissful norm. To start, advances in antidepressant medications made them safer and more attractive to the masses; she earnestly acknowledges that psychotropic medications improve and sometimes save lives. But prescriptions for Prozac and its medicinal brethren are as ubiquitous today as those for hypertension and cholesterol, making ordinary disappointment seem like a problem in need of a chemical solution. The mental wellness industry, too, \u003ca href=\"https://globalwellnessinstitute.org/industry-research/the-global-wellness-economy-looking-beyond-covid/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">worth about $131 billion globally\u003c/a>, sells the idea that feeling rotten is avoidable (if you purchase just the right eucalyptus oil or bath bomb). Finally, because \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61031/teen-girls-and-lgbtq-youth-plagued-by-violence-and-trauma-survey-says\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">adolescents are in fact gloomier today than they were just ten years ago\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, it’s harder for parents and kids to figure out what distinguishes a legitimate mental health crisis from everyday emotional discomfort.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">On this last point, Damour shares the findings of social psychologist Jonathan Haidt and psychology professor Jean Twenge who are \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://docs.google.com/document/d/1diMvsMeRphUH7E6D1d_J7R6WbDdgnzFHDHPx9HXzR5o/edit\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">sounding the alarm about youth mental health\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">: Just before the start of the COVID-19 pandemic, 44 percent of teenagers reported experiencing anxiety, up from 34 percent about ten years ago; 37 percent felt “persistently sad or hopeless”; 16 percent of teenagers said that they’d developed a suicide plan. Those self-reported findings were matched by increases in hospitalizations for self-harm and a surge in the number of completed suicides, mostly since 2012. New \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.cdc.gov/healthyyouth/data/yrbs/yrbs_data_summary_and_trends.htm\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">findings\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> released by the CDC in February revealed that \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61031/teen-girls-and-lgbtq-youth-plagued-by-violence-and-trauma-survey-says\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">girls and LGBTQ+ youth especially are floundering\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. Whether from what Haidt calls the rise in “\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61026/10-things-to-know-about-how-social-media-affects-teens-brains\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">phone-based childhoods\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">,” creeping \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60498/what-parents-should-know-about-eco-anxiety-and-its-impact-on-todays-teens\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">existential despair\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, or the effect of \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60624/young-adults-are-struggling-with-their-mental-health-is-more-childhood-independence-the-answer\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">too little free and unstructured time\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> — and likely some combination of all these and more — adolescents are struggling today in ways that they weren’t just a decade ago. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">What’s a conscientious parent to do? “One of the most important things we can do for teenagers is help them distinguish between emotions that are uncomfortable (and) emotions that are unmanageable,” Damour told me. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Mothers and fathers should help their young children build authentic self-esteem by celebrating kids’ actions and avoiding effusive praise. Encourage girls and boys to be of service to others, not only to interrupt their solipsistic mindset, but also to reinforce their ability to make a difference. Next, urge them to develop an interest that’s unrelated to school or college applications, like cooking or knitting. Indulging an intrinsic interest is protective of kids’ feelings of self-worth. Finally, get going on these pursuits before a child reaches middle school, when even the healthiest child might falter. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">The best thing parents can do after this is help their children learn both to express and regulate their emotions. Articulating painful feelings robs the feelings of their power, and learning how to manage them restores kids’ self-control.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">To encourage open expression, \u003c/span>\u003ci>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">listen\u003c/span>\u003c/i>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, Damour advises. Be curious about your child’s state of mind. Ask your child to be as verbally precise as possible. Then, repeat back what your child says in her moment of sorrow or fear to demonstrate that you genuinely understand. Once they’ve expressed their heartache, try capturing their hurt in a one-sentence summary — like the editor who creates a headline for a story — and show empathy in return. “Listening attentively and then offering empathy shows them that they are doing exactly the right thing when they seek relief by finding a loving listener (that would be us!) and sharing what’s on their mind,” Damour writes. Above all, defy the temptation to jump in with creative solutions, as irresistible as that may seem.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">For the teenager who resists face-to-face conversations, try other ways of inviting communication. Some children will respond to gentle text messages from parents. Others will be more talkative if they’re strapped into the back seat of the car, spared the awkwardness of direct eye contact. And if parents want their teenagers to talk, they might have to be around more often so that it can happen \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.washingtonpost.com/parenting/2023/02/21/teen-talks-night-parents/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">when the kids are conversational\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. Though they can be mercurial and ornery, teenagers typically like their parents and feel safer when they know where the grown-ups are. Another way to invite emotional expression: Own up to your own mistakes. For example, if you’ve gossiped to a friend about something personal your child has shared with you, and he learns of it, correct your blunder the right way: Apologize for violating his confidence, explain why you did, take responsibility, vow never to blab again, offer to make amends and ask for forgiveness. Because emotional expression is so essential to adolescents’ (and adults’) well-being, parents need to safeguard their kids’ trust. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">After they’ve exhausted their efforts to spur expression, parents can help children learn to self-regulate. Suggest a distraction to interrupt unpleasant rumination. Offer them small comforts tailored to their preferences. \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/60543/what-parents-need-to-monitor-about-teens-sleep-beyond-the-hour-count\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Check in on their sleep habits\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> and help them reclaim the eight to ten hours they need. When offering advice, tread lightly: Ask if it’s wanted and approach solutions jointly. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Some children experiencing protracted and irrational sadness and worry need more than a parent or guardian can provide. “I have so much empathy for parents who are trying to figure out if a meltdown is a sign of typical and expectable stress or a sign of a mental health concern,” Damour said. Adults would be wise to seek professional help if their adolescent’s feelings “don’t add up,” or they can’t manage them constructively, or they resort to risky coping strategies. But remember that zig-zagging, capacious feelings are not something to be avoided or feared. “Distress is part of life, and it certainly comes with the territory for teenagers,” she said.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"info": "Possible is hosted by entrepreneur Reid Hoffman and writer Aria Finger. Together in Possible, Hoffman and Finger lead enlightening discussions about building a brighter collective future. The show features interviews with visionary guests like Trevor Noah, Sam Altman and Janette Sadik-Khan. Possible paints an optimistic portrait of the world we can create through science, policy, business, art and our shared humanity. It asks: What if everything goes right for once? How can we get there? Each episode also includes a short fiction story generated by advanced AI GPT-4, serving as a thought-provoking springboard to speculate how humanity could leverage technology for good.",
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"soldout": {
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