Wine and Whimsy: A Guide to Wine Pairing with Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans

In the wizarding world of the award-winning theater production Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, jumping chocolate frogs and fizzing whizzbees taste like pure magic—but we mere mortals may never know the joy of a trip to Hogsmeade or a Hogwarts Express visit from the Trolley Witch to sample treacle tarts and pumpkin pasties. Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans, however, do exist in our world—or at least a Muggle-friendly version crafted by Jelly Belly—and they delight (and occasionally disgust) with their unusual and unique jelly bean flavors. Plus, while butterbeer isn't a common beverage in our realm, we can’t help but realize that the world of wine and the seemingly endless rows of bottles at your local wine shop call to mind the whimsy and wonder of Ollivander’s Wand Shop.

We're always looking for ways to bring magic to our daily lives, so we've conjured up the perfect pairings for your next spellbinding snack break. For every odd Bertie Bott's flavor that seems to cast a spell as you chew, there’s a wine out there for you!

Bertie Bott's Flavor: Black Pepper
Recommended Wine Pairing: Syrah

If you happen to like the bite of a black pepper Every Flavour Bean, look no further than Syrah—especially those from cooler pockets of France’s Rhône Valley. This signature spiciness joins black fruit and earth in reds from appellations like Saint-Joseph, Crozes-Hermitage, or Côtes-du-Rhône, but for a special candlelit occasion, bring out the nice goblets for wines from Hermitage and Côte-Rôtie. Not into reds? Seek out Grüner Veltliner from Austria, scented with white pepper to join its mouthwatering green apple fruit.

Bertie Bott's Flavor: Grass
Recommended Wine Pairing: Sauvignon Blanc

Say you’re partial to the taste of a grass Every Flavour Bean, or even the summer scent of a freshly-mowed lawn: Sauvignon Blanc is your grape! Its signature grassiness accompanies green apple and fresh citrus tones in cooler climates like Sancerre or Pouilly-Fumé in France’s Loire Valley, or with tropical guava notes in warmer climates like Marlborough in New Zealand.

Bertie Bott's Flavor: Marshmallow
Recommended Wine Pairing: Oaked Chardonnay

If the sticky memory of Rice Krispie Treats or s’mores energizes your patronus, look no further than warm-climate, oaked Chardonnay. Along with accents of vanilla from oak, this style of wine sometimes goes through a process called malolactic fermentation which can give it a buttery, textured mouthfeel. If you need an Ollivander to help select your perfect match, ask your local wine shop to steer you toward a bottle that might suit your tastes.

Bertie Bott's Flavor: Ear Wax
Recommended Wine Pairing: Chenin Blanc

Alas! Earwax! Okay—we admit this one’s a little weird for our standards, but hear us out! Sometimes there’s a waxiness when it comes to the texture of a wine, and sometimes it’s accented with the flavor of honeycomb. The versatile Chenin Blanc takes on many forms, but be sure to seek out Vouvray from France’s Loire Valley, which often has a honeyed waxy sweetness that accompanies its pomaceous fruit. For even more of a flavor adventure, seek out the nearby Savennières, which can have an earthy, mushroom-like flavor to complement its waxy texture and apple fruit, especially in aged versions. The latter can be hard to find, so catch that golden snitch if you can!

Bertie Bott's Flavor: Dirt
Recommended Wine Pairing: Bordeaux

Earthiness isn’t an uncommon theme in wine, but we find a reliable streak in red wines from Bordeaux. Mainly crafted from varying combinations of Cabernet Sauvignon and Merlot, flavors of plum, cassis, and herbs can often have an inflections of wet gravel, sandalwood, or soil.

While we know that the polyjuice potion doesn’t exist in our world (for now, at least), the craft of winemaking might be the closest thing we have to potions class. Although they won’t make us shapeshift, who’s to say the flavor of a bright Sauvignon Blanc won’t mentally teleport you to the grassy fields of our childhoods?

For even more fun from the magical world of Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, tune in to a special episode of Check, Please! Bay Area, as host Leslie Sbrocco joins the cast and crew of the San Francisco production of this award-winning show in studio at KQED. They're sharing their Prophet-approved picks for the can't-miss places to eat in the Bay Area, Thursday, September 1, at 7:30pm, on KQED 9.

KQED Food Engagement Intern Josh Decolongon is a certified sommelier and holds the WSET Level 4 Diploma. Follow him on Instagram at @sommeligay.