Watch Ex-Dad-in-Chief Barack Obama Enjoy His Life Without Us

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Photo: Jack Brockway

After brutal breakups, I'm a firm believer in hiding all signs that an ex exists. Click away from their social media pages; put down the magnifying glass. No good can come of it. But sometimes you just can't help yourself.

Cut to me staring at photos of a backwards baseball cap-wearing Barack Obama looking chill AF, and mumbling "I wish I knew how to quit you" to myself. He's moving on -- and I don't blame him -- but it still hurts.

As if that visual wasn't painful enough, now there's video of him kite-surfing with Richard Branson. I didn't even know he liked aquatic sports, or was friends with Branson, or had such toned, hairless thighs. Did I ever know him at all?

If you are a masochist like I am, check out the video for yourself:


If you need me, I'll be crying all over my locket portrait of Barry, while singing "I can't liiiiive, if living is without youuuu."