SF Giants Fans Blame Taylor Swift for Losing the World Series, But Should They Be Blaming Kanye Instead?

Photo: Emmanuel Hapsis

In the words of all-knowing prophet Kylie Jenner, 2016 would be the year of "realizing things." And boy, was she right. In addition to learning that love is dead and white dudes can get away with almost anything, the world also realized that we all hate Taylor Swift (or, to be precise, you all do; I'm forever and for always a Swiftie). And this group of haters now includes San Francisco Giants fans, who have decided they can't #even with the Queen of Breakup Anthems. But why, you ask? I'll tell you...

Even year autumns are very important to both Taylor Swift and the SF Giants:

  • In October 2010, Taylor Swift released her third album, Speak Now. Exactly a week later, the Giants won the World Series.
  • In October 2012, Taylor Swift released Red. The Giants won the World Series six days later.
  • In October 2014, Taylor Swift released 1989. The Giants won the World Series two days later.

Are you sensing a pattern here? Taylor Swift graces us with a collection of poignant, yet fun earworms and the SF Giants, emboldened by her mix of raw honesty and catchy melodies, respond by dominating.

But -- *record scratch* -- the even year witchcraft did not work its magic this year. The Giants didn't even make it to the World Series, let alone win, and we're still waiting on new music from Taylor. Giants fans are not happy, to put it mildly.

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Maybe if the bullpen had a new breakup banger about Tom Hiddleston to listen to, they wouldn't have choked against the Cubs. Maybe the departures of Tim Lincecum, the Beard and other key players has nothing to do with performance and backroom deals and everything to do with Taylor Swift's terrible decision to pair the fun and light "Style" with a sad, dramatic music video.

Or maybe if Kanye and Kim hadn't exposed Taylor Swift this summer, causing her to go into hiding in order to give the public enough space to forgive, forget and fall back in love with her, she would have kept to her even year autumnal schedule, thus ensuring another World Series win for the Giants.

Could Kanye be the real culprit here? Has he been planning this Giants sabotage since that infamous VMA moment? Why would he care enough to plot such an elaborate evil genius scheme?

Easy: He's from Chicago; the Giants lost to the Chicago Cubs.

Hello! Wake up, sheeple!

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The truth is out there.

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