I recently signed a lease on an apartment, ending a maddening several months of Craigslist searching. When looking for cheap apartments in the East Bay, it is almost impossible to find a place that doesn’t want you as part of some sort of ultra-specific, vaguely-cult-sounding urban farm, commune, or best-friend-collective.
Most Craigslist posters of this ilk seem to want you to fit into a very precise mold of a person they’ve imagined. There are several distinct types of posters like this:
One is the type who makes it clear he or she wants you to keep absolutely clean at all times, stay quiet and have no visitors. People who post these listings? I’m advising you not to do that. The only people who fit the descriptions you’re posting are serial killers.
Another type is the person who makes absolutely no sense. Here is a picture of one: (Or at least, I inferred by the post that the picture was of him.)
I hope my editors don’t mind that I plan on making my next three articles a multi-part analysis of how fascinating this image is. Those jorts!