Oh, Dear God: Perez Hilton Cast as Danny Tanner in 'Full House' Musical

Earlier this month, Lifetime released a horrifying cast photo of their Full House TV movie. If you caught a glimpse of it, chances are it's probably still seared into your retina. Nothing could so crudely demolish our fond childhood memories of that show, we thought.

Oh, but something could...and that something's name is Perez Hilton, who was just cast as germaphobe Danny Tanner in a musical parody of the series set to take Toronto and New York this August and September. Obviously, this is a comedic venture so the producers aren't necessarily going for accuracy here. But of all the funny people in the world, they decided on Perez Hilton? The guy who's made a career out of bullying famous women and drawing lewd things on their faces? Was Dov Charney unavailable?

Here's a look at the rest of the cast 'cause I know your morbid curiosity is nagging at you right now:

full house musical parody cast

And yes that's a grown human cast as the Olsen Twins.

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I'll let Michelle speak for herself:

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Yeah, what she said.

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