Gilmore Girls: What the Rumored New Season or Movie Should & Shouldn’t Do

Photo: The CW

Ever since Gilmore Girls was abruptly yanked from airwaves back in 2007, fans have tried to forget the sloppy way the brilliant show ended through a mixture of repeated marathons of better seasons and sheer denial. Rumors of a movie or mini-season have bubbled up pretty consistently over the years, but never from the lips of someone actually connected to the show. Until now, that is!

Scott Patterson, a.k.a. Luke "Butch" Danes, appeared on the Gilmore Guys podcast and had this to say:

“There are talks going on at the moment...So I’m hopeful, and you know, I’m in. I think it would be a big event, and I think it would be a great fan celebration. They deserve it. I think there’s a lot of territory left unexplored that we could explore in a limited series or a TV movie or feature film, whatever that may be. I think it really just comes down to the script. I think everybody would jump on board.”

Hold me!

We already know that most of the cast is set to reunite for a panel at next month's ATX Television Festival. Maybe they'll announce their master plan? Or just have the chance to make one?

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While we wait to find out, here's what this Gilmore Girls fanatic needs from any future iteration of the show:

Give us the Luke and Lorelai wedding!

gilmore girls lorelai luke wedding

The writers and stars of Gilmore Girls had no idea the last episode of Season 7 would be the last ever so what we're left with is an abrupt, vague, unsatisfying womp of an ending. Fans are most bitter about missing out on a Lorelai and Luke wedding, something that was years in the making. Any new season or movie will need to make that right with a flashback of some sort. Or maybe we didn't miss the wedding? Picture it: L&L hold out for all these years because, like Angie and Brad Pitt, they wanted to wait until all gays could also get married. Speaking of the gays...

Let Michel (and others) be gay!

michel gilmore girls gay

While Lorelai and Rory seem to be pretty progressive, the show itself is a bit tone-deaf when it comes to LGBT issues. Although not as cringe-worthy as Friends (I dare you to count the number of gay panic jokes), Gilmore Girls has its moments, like when Lorelai tells Luke, “We need to leave the country and have extensive plastic surgery and sex changes, both of us! So…we can kiss and not look funny.”

These occasional gay jokes are the closest the show gets to having any LGBT visibility, as no character within the extensive cast is out. But some characters could be read as gay. There's Michel, the wise-cracking French concierge who loves Celine Dion and parties all night with Janet Jackson drag queens. And Gypsy, the unmarried auto mechanic. And Sookie’s midwife doula, Bruce. It's about time Gilmore Girls got with the times and allowed gays to become more than just a punchline.

Put Emily outside her comfort zone!

emily gilmore girls

With the passing of Edward Herrmann, Emily Gilmore would presumably either be divorced or a widow. This is an opportunity for her to fully commit to her chain-smoking, dgaf alter ego. Let's see what happens when she doesn't get her hair set every day and quits the DAR to dance with hot dudes at singles bars. Or maybe Richard leaves all his money to his lurking ex, Pennilyn Lott, and Emily has to move in with Lorelai! Yes, that's it!

Allow Lane to enjoy something!

lane gilmore girls

Lane, Rory's super cool, music-obsessed first-generation bestie, rebelled in early seasons: hiding CDs under her bedroom floorboards, kissing Seth Cohen from The OC while clutching a Bible, and dyeing her hair purple in protest of her mother's suffocating expectations. But, as the show progressed, Lane ended up losing her nerve and became a martyr with a habit of settling for less.

She agreed to attend a super Christian school that frowns on girls interacting with boys. She settled for Zach, an immature layabout. She only had sex once and didn't enjoy it and ended up pregnant with twins. And she settled for a best friend who doesn't keep in touch and only appears when she needs something.

After being relegated to the sidelines and treated like a mere afterthought by the show's writers for so long, it's time Lane got hers. Give the girl a storyline! Allow her to get her groove back!

No more Logan!

logan paris gilmore girls

In the beginning of the series, Rory was counter-culture, albeit in a goodie good sort of way. Enter Logan and all of a sudden she's hosting DAR functions and wearing pearls and not talking to her mom. Nothing good came from Logan's introduction and only good can come from his permanent exile.

Put Jackson in jail!

jackson sookie gilmore girls

With Melissa McCarthy's meteoric rise to fame (who would have thunk?), Sookie might not even be in the mix in a future Gilmore Girls project. If she doesn't Olsen twin her way out of the reunion, I humbly request that her husband, Jackson, does not make an appearance. He might seem innocuous, but lest we forget the time he lied to his wife about getting a vasectomy in order to trick her into having more children than she wanted. The only way I want to see him is if the storyline involves Sookie taking him to court over that mess.

Let's agree to forget April Nardini!

Photo: The CW
Photo: The CW

The show jumped the shark when it introduced Luke's secret love child, as a way to drive a wedge between Luke and Lorelai. Instead of creating an interesting tension, all it really achieved was infuriating fans and making Luke seem like a huge jerk. It was an unnecessary move deserving of a mindless soap opera, not our beloved whip-smart show. We don't need a reminder of these dark times. Let's not speak of her again.

Do not even think about recasting anyone!

Photo: Stars Hollow Confessions
Photo: Stars Hollow Confessions

The last thing the world needs is another Becky from Roseanne situation. During its run, Gilmore Girls recast Mia, the hotel owner who gave Lorelai her first job, and it was really weird. Almost as weird as when the show cast Sherilyn Fenn in two separate roles. Just say no.

Rory doesn't get back with an ex...unless it's Jess!

gilmore-girls-jess-i-love-you-gif

I've already mentioned that Logan should take his stupid rocket gift and be gone. Dean also can't sit with us. He was an okay first boyfriend (he built her a car!), but he was also jealous, needy and controlling. Rory needs to move on from these zeroes and get with a hero, probably someone brand new...

...unless it's Jess. Yes, he was bratty at times, but his chemistry with Rory is unparalleled and he was the only guy who truly understood her. By the end of the show, he had calmed down and emotionally matured, on his way to becoming the Dave Eggers of Philadelphia. He tried to make things right with Rory several times, but she was too blinded by Logan's privilege to take it seriously. Now could be their moment! (Prediction: we're all a few minutes away from  Google image searching lots of pictures of Milo Ventimiglia.)

Please include the hallowed final four words!

lorelai gilmore girls

Show-runner Amy Sherman-Palladino has teased that she has known the final four words of the show since its early days, but we never got to find out what they were. Any movie or future season obviously needs to include them and give us the ending that we deserve. Make it so, arc that bends towards justice!

What do you hope to see in a future Gilmore Girls reunion? Leave it in the comments!

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