upper waypoint

The Post Where KQED Staff Imagine What Google Employees Complain About...

Save ArticleSave Article
Failed to save article

Please try again

Fortune magazine has named Google the best place in America to work. And why not? Check out the perks bestowed on the privileged citizens of the Kingdom of Search:

  • Yoga
  • Car wash
  • Running trails
  • Subsidized massages
  • Free laundry machine
  • Rock climbing wall
  • Bike repair
  • Blah blah blah we get free tote bags here so shut up

What do they got going over there, Sweden? Well, paying tribute to the American worker's right -- nay, duty -- to complain about his or her workplace no matter how much of a pampering paradise it may be, we asked our otherwise extremely busy newsroom staff to come up with some bones your average imaginary Googler might have to pick with their bosses.

Overheard at Google (in our heads)...

  • "This roll on my Kobe beef burger is not gluten-free."
  • "The infinity pool is really over-chlorinated today."
  • "No pilates instruction on the 4:18 shuttle?"
  • "The medical plan only paid for half my cousin's liposuction."
  • "This stock is never going to get out of triple digits, is it?"
  • "Sushi? Again?"
  • "Hey Frank, a couple of us are getting together after work to buy Yahoo! You in? C'mon!"
  • "I love this place, but why does it sound like it was named by a baby?"

It's Friday. We're out. Go Niners!

Sponsored

lower waypoint
next waypoint
Pro-Palestinian Protests Sweep Bay Area College Campuses Amid Surging National MovementState Court Upholds Alameda County Tax Measure Yielding Hundreds of Millions for Child CareYouth Takeover: Parents (and Teachers) Just Don't UnderstandSan José Adding Hundreds of License Plate Readers Amid Privacy and Efficacy ConcernsCalifornia Law Letting Property Owners Split Lots to Build New Homes Is 'Unconstitutional,' Judge RulesViolence Escalates in Sudan as Civil War Enters Second YearSF Emergency Dispatchers Struggle to Respond Amid Outdated Systems, Severe UnderstaffingLess Than 1% of Santa Clara County Contracts Go to Black and Latino Businesses, Study ShowsHow the Supreme Court Case on Homelessness Could Affect the BayCalifornia Moves to Create a 'Sanctuary' for Arizona Women Seeking Abortions