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Julie and John Gottman on How to ‘Turn Conflict into Connection'

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Frustrated couple having a fight on the couch. (Photodjo via Getty Images)

According to relationship experts, Drs. Julie and John Gottman, it is perfectly OK to go to bed angry. Sometimes a couple needs time to calm down and reset. As they note, “Fights can get intense and messy…We get hijacked by our emotions, our pasts, our old hurts. But if you can get at what’s underneath, there’s so much compassion and understanding.” In their latest book, “Fight Right,” the Gottmans explode misconceptions about fighting and share ways to get through conflict and find connection. We talk to the Gottmans and hear from you: how do you handle conflict in your relationship?


Julie Schwartz Gottman, co-author "Fight Right: How Successful Couples Turn Conflict into Connection" - Schwartz Gottman is a clinical psychologist, therapist and researcher and with her husband Dr. John Gottman, is the co-founder and president of the Gottman Institute.

John Gottman, co-author "Fight Right: How Successful Couples Turn Conflict into Connection" - Gottman is a psychologist, researcher, therapist, and with his wife Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman, he is the co-founder, The Gottman Institute.


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