Y’know, I think this bummed-out superhero thing is catching. Depressed Bat-guy, brooding Spider-dude, even the Man of Steel seems existentially troubled in previews of his most recent incarnation.
And smart-alecky Iron Man? He’d appeared inoculated by Tony Stark’s reflexive snark from succumbing to a similar ailment — but even he’s having anxiety attacks these days. Ever since that Avengers dust-up with those unpleasant aliens last summer, he’s evidently been having trouble sleeping.
And now, with his super-buddies occupied elsewhere, our hero is on his own when a pontificating bad guy (Ben Kingsley) surfaces, all ornate robes and dirty hair and pretentious Asian-inspired name, with a retinue of suicide bombers and an affect that suggests he wants to be thought of as Osama bin Mandarin.
When his minions lay waste to a public square, blowing up a lot of innocent civilians — similarities to Boston presumably not intended, but hard to ignore — Stark’s reaction is to issue an “If you’re a man, you’ll come after me, I’ll leave the door unlocked” dare through the press. Complete with his address. (Not perhaps the wisest move a sleep-deprived, trigger-happy billionaire who wants to protect his girlfriend could do.)
Happily, Stark’s been working on a nifty new Iron Man app that lets him bond with his body armor one kneepad at a time. There are still a few kinks — as the pieces careen his way, it looks like he’s under attack, and until they’re all synched up he can’t fly — but his artificially intelligent pal Jarvis (voiced by Paul Bettany) is good at working them out in real time. For a while, at least.