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"disqusTitle": "Drama World Series: Find Out Which Show Won an All-Day Marathon!",
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"content": "\u003cp>For the past three weeks, your most beloved TV shows duked it out in a bracket smackdown to win an all-day marathon on KQED PLUS on Sunday, October 29, 2017.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>There were shocking upsets (like when \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> lost by less than one percentage point to \u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/phoebe-shocked-gif-friends.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96984\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/phoebe-shocked-gif-friends.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"245\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And mighty blowouts (like when \u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em> obliterated both \u003cem>Anne of Green Gables\u003c/em> and \u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em> with 76% and 80% of the vote, respectively).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/downton-countess-gif-happy.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96985\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/downton-countess-gif-happy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"545\" height=\"363\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After the smoke cleared, it was down to \u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em> versus \u003cem>Sherlock\u003c/em>. Considering how much \u003cem>Downton \u003c/em>has slayed in this series, I thought it was obvious we would all be watching 24 hours of \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/03/04/the-best-quotes-from-downton-abbeys-dowager-countess-queen-of-shade/\">Countess quips\u003c/a> this Sunday.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/world-without-books-gifs-tv_0.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96986\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/world-without-books-gifs-tv_0.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"359\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But you're going to have to put away your Sybil-inspired harem pants...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/harem-pants-downton-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96982\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/harem-pants-downton-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"216\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>... because in a last-minute surprise comeback, \u003cem>Sherlock\u003c/em> pulled out the win by a mere 6 votes!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/sherlock-shocked-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96983\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/sherlock-shocked-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"323\" height=\"280\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=\"9850349\"]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Make sure to tune into KQED PLUS this Sunday, October 29, 2017, for a full day of cheekbones and upturned collars!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Our Drama World Series might be over, but that doesn't mean the fun has to stop. \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Catch up on our recaps\u003c/a> of \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria/\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, and \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey/\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After the smoke cleared, it was down to \u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em> versus \u003cem>Sherlock\u003c/em>. Considering how much \u003cem>Downton \u003c/em>has slayed in this series, I thought it was obvious we would all be watching 24 hours of \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/03/04/the-best-quotes-from-downton-abbeys-dowager-countess-queen-of-shade/\">Countess quips\u003c/a> this Sunday.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/world-without-books-gifs-tv_0.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96986\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/world-without-books-gifs-tv_0.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"359\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But you're going to have to put away your Sybil-inspired harem pants...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/harem-pants-downton-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96982\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/harem-pants-downton-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"216\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>... because in a last-minute surprise comeback, \u003cem>Sherlock\u003c/em> pulled out the win by a mere 6 votes!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/sherlock-shocked-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96983\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/sherlock-shocked-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"323\" height=\"280\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=\"9850349\"]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Make sure to tune into KQED PLUS this Sunday, October 29, 2017, for a full day of cheekbones and upturned collars!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Our Drama World Series might be over, but that doesn't mean the fun has to stop. \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Catch up on our recaps\u003c/a> of \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria/\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, and \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey/\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Poldark' Season 3 Episode 4 Recap: Break Free",
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"content": "\u003cp>In\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/15/poldark-season-3-episode-3-recap-kiss-the-girl/\"> the previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Demelza casually delivered her own baby, Morwenna and Drake finally made out, and Doc had to eat a rat on Christmas day. Will Demelza put her newfound birthing talent to use and become an OB-GYN? Will Morwenna and Drake come down with mono? Will the next rat Doc comes across teach him how to cook up a mean \u003ca href=\"https://projectedrealities.files.wordpress.com/2014/01/ratatouillec.jpg\">ratatouille\u003c/a>? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Not a whole lot has changed since last week. Doc is still hanging out with corpses, soon-to-be corpses, and \u003ca href=\"http://anamericantail.wikia.com/wiki/Fievel_Mousekewitz\">Fievel Mousekewitz\u003c/a>’s relatives. Blondie is still in denial about all of that. Ross is still plotting to do something that has a 98.2% chance of getting him killed (mainly going back to France to reprise his role as the world's worst spy). And Demelza is still so tired of everyone's BS. Same, Demelza. Same.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In town, Valentine is diagnosed with rickets because\u003ca href=\"https://spoonuniversity.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/236/2016/08/Screen-Shot-2016-08-09-at-4.06.25-PM.png\"> those delicious Flintstone vitamins\u003c/a> haven't been invented yet. Malfoy is beside himself, not out of concern for his (*cough* Ross') baby, but because he doesn't want to be associated with a \"deformed\" child. Stay classy, spawn of Satan.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in France, the guards have taken to rolling dice to determine whether a prisoner with blue eyes or brown eyes dies next.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dear green-eyed prisoners:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/shantay-you-stay-rupaul-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96929\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/shantay-you-stay-rupaul-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"275\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In Cornwall, Morwenna slides into second base with Drake a few more times. But Agatha's tarot cards dampen the mood by pointing out that, once Malfoy finds out, he will surely find a way to destroy Drake's life. Because breaking up with a It's-not-you-it's-me text isn't a thing yet, Morwenna has to crush Drake's heart in person. Drake immediately walks to the nearest cliff to jump to his death, but stops short when he receives the advice I telepathically send him from the future: \u003cem>Become an unlikely rapper who only writes about being sad over girls, à la your 21st-century namesake!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saddest-boy-canada-drake-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96930\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saddest-boy-canada-drake-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"220\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You know what has the power to cheer Drake up (and probably could cure Valentine's rickets too)? A Horace the Pug sighting!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96935\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-1020x571.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"358\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-1020x571.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-800x448.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-768x430.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-1920x1075.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-1180x660.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-960x537.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-240x134.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-375x210.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-520x291.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I sure feel better. Don't you?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Instead of following my advice and writing a \"Hotline Bling\"-esque breakup jam, Drake decides to secretly join the cast of \u003cem>Saving Private Doc\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96977\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-1020x1257.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"789\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-1020x1257.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-160x197.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-800x985.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-768x946.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-1180x1454.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-960x1183.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-240x296.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-375x462.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-520x641.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2.jpg 1186w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dying nobly abroad is one way to get an ex's attention, but I still prefer the maudlin rapping.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despite there being a full-blown war going on, Ross and co. waltz right into France without any problems. After going over the prison break plan, Ross and his buddies quickly realize how ill-conceived and stupid the whole idea is. But they decide to just do it anyway because \u003ca href=\"https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=YOLO\">YOLO\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yolo-drake-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96937\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yolo-drake-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"244\" height=\"174\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They head-butt and punch their way into the POW camp and find Doc pretty easily. But Doc wants to stay and cauterize more festering wounds with a spoon.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/oh-come-on-tim-gunn-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96938\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/oh-come-on-tim-gunn-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While Ross tries to convince Doc to give Mother Teresa-ing a rest and get the hell up, some little pipsqueak alerts the entire camp about the escape attempt. Ross and Drake drop-kick a few guards! One of Ross' friends uses a bomb to blow open a gate while laughing! Everyone takes turns casually murdering guards!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in England, Malfoy and Elizabeth run around a fancy party bad-mouthing Ross and his attempt to free Doc to anyone who will listen. Trouble is there's no one who will. Everyone loves Ross and hopes \u003cem>Saving Private Doc \u003c/em>wins Best Picture. IN YOUR FACE, JERKS!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/in-your-face-water-balloon-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96943\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/in-your-face-water-balloon-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In France, things have taken a turn. One of Ross' friends gets shot. I don't know his name, so only low-to-medium care.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/oh-no-phoebe-friends-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96945\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/oh-no-phoebe-friends-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"220\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Drake tries to drag Captain No Name to safety, and also gets shot. I very much care.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/noooo-phoebe-friends-gif-reaction.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96944\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/noooo-phoebe-friends-gif-reaction.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"320\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross and friends make it to a hiding place, but it's too late for Captain. He died doing what he loved: mainly blowing sh-t up.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Super_Mario_Bros_2_NES_30.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96974\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Super_Mario_Bros_2_NES_30.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"256\" height=\"224\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The not-so-merry band of misfits manage to make it to their getaway rowboat, but Drake isn't doing well. Ross has a waking nightmare of how pissed Demelza will be, if he lets her brother die.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/grind-teeth-marge-mad-pissed-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96961\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/grind-teeth-marge-mad-pissed-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As we saw last week, Demelza can very casually bring life into this world; she can casually snuff life out of it too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dont-mess-with-me-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96962\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dont-mess-with-me-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"450\" height=\"324\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Thankfully for Ross, Demelza won't have to kill anyone today. Drake pulls through and everyone makes it back home. Sam, who stayed home worrying about how sinful kissing is, immediately takes the credit: \"See, brother, my prayers did work!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/no-britney-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96963\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/no-britney-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"223\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Malfoy receives word that Ross succeeded in freeing Doc, and helped 20 others escape, including Doc's prison bestie, who happens to be the nephew of some rich person Malfoy desperately wants to impress. IN YOUR FACE AGAIN!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/in-your-face-water-balloon-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96943\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/in-your-face-water-balloon-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the mine, everyone gathers to hear Demelza's rendition of Mariah Carey's \"One Sweet Day,\" in honor of Captain's memory. It goes to #1 and stays there for 16 weeks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96973\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-1020x913.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"573\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-1020x913.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-160x143.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-800x716.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-768x687.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-960x859.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-240x215.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-375x336.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-520x465.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey.jpg 1144w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UXxRyNvTPr8\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: Malfoy and Elizabeth. \u003c/strong>I hope the random puddle that murdered Francis takes care of these two sometime soon. Maybe I'll get Sam to pray on it.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: Horace the Pug\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">. \u003c/span>\u003c/strong>\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Sure, he didn't do much this episode, but I just like rewarding him, okay?\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong> \u003cstrong>Drake. \u003c/strong>He survived heartbreak \u003cem>and\u003c/em> being shot in the back. So much material for his debut album!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>SILVER: Ross. \u003c/strong>His directorial debut, \u003cem>Saving Private Doc\u003c/em>, had everything a Best Picture winner needs: adventure, emotion, drop-kicking. Brava! Two thumbs up!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>GOLD: Captain.\u003c/strong> Sorry he had to die. Also sorry I was always too distracted by Agatha's drunken antics, Horace's cuteness, and shirtless river bathing to ever learn his name. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, or read all my \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> recaps\u003c/a> below!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/15/poldark-season-3-episode-3-recap-kiss-the-girl/\">'Poldark' Season 3 Episode 3 Recap: Kiss the Girl\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/08/poldark-season-3-episode-2-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi/\">‘Poldark’ Season 3 Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-vous Coucher Avec Moi?\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/02/poldark-season-3-premiere-recap-same-old-mistakes/\">‘Poldark’ Season 3 Premiere Recap: Same Old Mistakes\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/27/poldark-season-2-finale-recap-burn-baby-burn/\">‘Poldark’ Season 2 Finale Recap: Burn Baby Burn\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/20/poldark-season-2-episode-8-recap-man-i-feel-like-a-woman/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 8 Recap: Man! I Feel Like A Woman!\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7 Recap: I'm In Love With A Monster\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/19/poldark-season-1-premiere-recap-stayin-alive/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1 Premiere Recap: Stayin’ Alive\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "If you mixed 'Saving Private Ryan' with a Drake breakup song, you'd get this episode.",
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"title": "'Poldark' Season 3 Episode 4 Recap: Break Free | KQED",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/15/poldark-season-3-episode-3-recap-kiss-the-girl/\"> the previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Demelza casually delivered her own baby, Morwenna and Drake finally made out, and Doc had to eat a rat on Christmas day. Will Demelza put her newfound birthing talent to use and become an OB-GYN? Will Morwenna and Drake come down with mono? Will the next rat Doc comes across teach him how to cook up a mean \u003ca href=\"https://projectedrealities.files.wordpress.com/2014/01/ratatouillec.jpg\">ratatouille\u003c/a>? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Not a whole lot has changed since last week. Doc is still hanging out with corpses, soon-to-be corpses, and \u003ca href=\"http://anamericantail.wikia.com/wiki/Fievel_Mousekewitz\">Fievel Mousekewitz\u003c/a>’s relatives. Blondie is still in denial about all of that. Ross is still plotting to do something that has a 98.2% chance of getting him killed (mainly going back to France to reprise his role as the world's worst spy). And Demelza is still so tired of everyone's BS. Same, Demelza. Same.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In town, Valentine is diagnosed with rickets because\u003ca href=\"https://spoonuniversity.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/236/2016/08/Screen-Shot-2016-08-09-at-4.06.25-PM.png\"> those delicious Flintstone vitamins\u003c/a> haven't been invented yet. Malfoy is beside himself, not out of concern for his (*cough* Ross') baby, but because he doesn't want to be associated with a \"deformed\" child. Stay classy, spawn of Satan.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in France, the guards have taken to rolling dice to determine whether a prisoner with blue eyes or brown eyes dies next.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dear green-eyed prisoners:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/shantay-you-stay-rupaul-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96929\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/shantay-you-stay-rupaul-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"275\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In Cornwall, Morwenna slides into second base with Drake a few more times. But Agatha's tarot cards dampen the mood by pointing out that, once Malfoy finds out, he will surely find a way to destroy Drake's life. Because breaking up with a It's-not-you-it's-me text isn't a thing yet, Morwenna has to crush Drake's heart in person. Drake immediately walks to the nearest cliff to jump to his death, but stops short when he receives the advice I telepathically send him from the future: \u003cem>Become an unlikely rapper who only writes about being sad over girls, à la your 21st-century namesake!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saddest-boy-canada-drake-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96930\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saddest-boy-canada-drake-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"220\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You know what has the power to cheer Drake up (and probably could cure Valentine's rickets too)? A Horace the Pug sighting!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96935\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-1020x571.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"358\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-1020x571.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-800x448.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-768x430.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-1920x1075.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-1180x660.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-960x537.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-240x134.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-375x210.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-the-pug-520x291.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I sure feel better. Don't you?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Instead of following my advice and writing a \"Hotline Bling\"-esque breakup jam, Drake decides to secretly join the cast of \u003cem>Saving Private Doc\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96977\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-1020x1257.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"789\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-1020x1257.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-160x197.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-800x985.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-768x946.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-1180x1454.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-960x1183.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-240x296.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-375x462.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2-520x641.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/saving-private-doc-poldark-2.jpg 1186w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dying nobly abroad is one way to get an ex's attention, but I still prefer the maudlin rapping.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despite there being a full-blown war going on, Ross and co. waltz right into France without any problems. After going over the prison break plan, Ross and his buddies quickly realize how ill-conceived and stupid the whole idea is. But they decide to just do it anyway because \u003ca href=\"https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=YOLO\">YOLO\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yolo-drake-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96937\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yolo-drake-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"244\" height=\"174\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They head-butt and punch their way into the POW camp and find Doc pretty easily. But Doc wants to stay and cauterize more festering wounds with a spoon.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/oh-come-on-tim-gunn-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96938\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/oh-come-on-tim-gunn-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While Ross tries to convince Doc to give Mother Teresa-ing a rest and get the hell up, some little pipsqueak alerts the entire camp about the escape attempt. Ross and Drake drop-kick a few guards! One of Ross' friends uses a bomb to blow open a gate while laughing! Everyone takes turns casually murdering guards!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in England, Malfoy and Elizabeth run around a fancy party bad-mouthing Ross and his attempt to free Doc to anyone who will listen. Trouble is there's no one who will. Everyone loves Ross and hopes \u003cem>Saving Private Doc \u003c/em>wins Best Picture. IN YOUR FACE, JERKS!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/in-your-face-water-balloon-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96943\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/in-your-face-water-balloon-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In France, things have taken a turn. One of Ross' friends gets shot. I don't know his name, so only low-to-medium care.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/oh-no-phoebe-friends-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96945\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/oh-no-phoebe-friends-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"220\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Drake tries to drag Captain No Name to safety, and also gets shot. I very much care.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/noooo-phoebe-friends-gif-reaction.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96944\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/noooo-phoebe-friends-gif-reaction.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"320\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross and friends make it to a hiding place, but it's too late for Captain. He died doing what he loved: mainly blowing sh-t up.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Super_Mario_Bros_2_NES_30.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96974\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Super_Mario_Bros_2_NES_30.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"256\" height=\"224\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The not-so-merry band of misfits manage to make it to their getaway rowboat, but Drake isn't doing well. Ross has a waking nightmare of how pissed Demelza will be, if he lets her brother die.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/grind-teeth-marge-mad-pissed-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96961\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/grind-teeth-marge-mad-pissed-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As we saw last week, Demelza can very casually bring life into this world; she can casually snuff life out of it too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dont-mess-with-me-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96962\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dont-mess-with-me-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"450\" height=\"324\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Thankfully for Ross, Demelza won't have to kill anyone today. Drake pulls through and everyone makes it back home. Sam, who stayed home worrying about how sinful kissing is, immediately takes the credit: \"See, brother, my prayers did work!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/no-britney-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96963\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/no-britney-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"223\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Malfoy receives word that Ross succeeded in freeing Doc, and helped 20 others escape, including Doc's prison bestie, who happens to be the nephew of some rich person Malfoy desperately wants to impress. IN YOUR FACE AGAIN!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/in-your-face-water-balloon-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96943\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/in-your-face-water-balloon-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the mine, everyone gathers to hear Demelza's rendition of Mariah Carey's \"One Sweet Day,\" in honor of Captain's memory. It goes to #1 and stays there for 16 weeks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96973\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-1020x913.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"573\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-1020x913.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-160x143.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-800x716.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-768x687.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-960x859.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-240x215.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-375x336.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey-520x465.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/one-sweet-day-demelza-carey.jpg 1144w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/UXxRyNvTPr8'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/UXxRyNvTPr8'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: Malfoy and Elizabeth. \u003c/strong>I hope the random puddle that murdered Francis takes care of these two sometime soon. Maybe I'll get Sam to pray on it.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: Horace the Pug\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">. \u003c/span>\u003c/strong>\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Sure, he didn't do much this episode, but I just like rewarding him, okay?\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong> \u003cstrong>Drake. \u003c/strong>He survived heartbreak \u003cem>and\u003c/em> being shot in the back. So much material for his debut album!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>SILVER: Ross. \u003c/strong>His directorial debut, \u003cem>Saving Private Doc\u003c/em>, had everything a Best Picture winner needs: adventure, emotion, drop-kicking. Brava! Two thumbs up!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>GOLD: Captain.\u003c/strong> Sorry he had to die. Also sorry I was always too distracted by Agatha's drunken antics, Horace's cuteness, and shirtless river bathing to ever learn his name. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, or read all my \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> recaps\u003c/a> below!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/15/poldark-season-3-episode-3-recap-kiss-the-girl/\">'Poldark' Season 3 Episode 3 Recap: Kiss the Girl\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/08/poldark-season-3-episode-2-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi/\">‘Poldark’ Season 3 Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-vous Coucher Avec Moi?\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/02/poldark-season-3-premiere-recap-same-old-mistakes/\">‘Poldark’ Season 3 Premiere Recap: Same Old Mistakes\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/27/poldark-season-2-finale-recap-burn-baby-burn/\">‘Poldark’ Season 2 Finale Recap: Burn Baby Burn\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/20/poldark-season-2-episode-8-recap-man-i-feel-like-a-woman/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 8 Recap: Man! I Feel Like A Woman!\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7 Recap: I'm In Love With A Monster\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Poldark' Season 3 Episode 3 Recap: Kiss the Girl",
"title": "'Poldark' Season 3 Episode 3 Recap: Kiss the Girl",
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"content": "\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/08/poldark-season-3-episode-2-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi/\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Ross was really terrible at spying in France and almost got guillotined. Will he risk his neck one more time to save Doc and his new beard? Will Drake and Morwenna finally make out (with Geoffrey Charles awkwardly watching, of course)? Will \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM.png\">Demelza and Blondie star in \u003cem>Thelma and Louise: The Prequel\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, even though their husbands aren't dead? Will Agatha let out another \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/916919639166246912?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fww2.kqed.org%2Fpop%2F2017%2F10%2F08%2Fpoldark-season-3-episode-2-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi%2F\">cute, prolonged fart\u003c/a>? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>How many minutes into this week's episode before something terrible happens to poor people? Answer: Not even one! Cold and starving, a few villagers snag some grain from one of Malfoy's boats so they don't have to die. They die anyway because soldiers shoot them in the street. The ones that survive are sentenced to fifteen years by Malfoy. Someone hold me back.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/scrappy-doo.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96771\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/scrappy-doo.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"320\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Demelza is doing manual labor while \u003cem>being in \u003c/em>labor. Now that Doc is a French captive and the only other doctor in town always manages to kill people by accident, Demelza has decided to secretly do it herself. I am still very emotional over the last time a Masterpiece show killed off a birthing mother (rest in power forever and always, Sybil from \u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>; I hope you're \u003ca href=\"http://recollections.biz/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/lady-sybil-blue-harem-pants-dowton.jpg\">wearing cool harem pants\u003c/a> in heaven), so here's hoping the writers leave Demelza -- and Valentine's new half-sibling -- alone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On a cliffside, Ross tsk-tsks as sick workers from the mine he sold to Malfoy cart off a dead colleague. Not one to miss an opportunity to gloat over the corpse of a poor person, Malfoy materializes and picks a fight by calling Ross a copper mine, \"full of noise but ultimately lacking in substance.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/tinf.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96786\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/tinf.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"240\" height=\"180\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When that barb falls flat, he tries poking at an old, very tired wound:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"How do you sleep at night?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Malfoy:\u003c/strong> \"Perhaps you should ask Elizabeth.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As with all things relating to Elizabeth, Ross instantly hears the \u003cem>Kill Bill\u003c/em> I'm-so-going-to-murder-you-right-now music in his head.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cOy6hqzfsAs\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But Ross' friend reminds him of Michelle Obama's aphorism, \"When they go low, we go high.\" Ross forces himself to stop fantasizing about putting a knife in Malfoy's eyeball and decides to wait 'til the season finale to murder him instead. A fine compromise!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross heads home and can't find Demelza anywhere. Please don't be dead. Please don't be dead. Please don't be dead.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She's not! She's casually kicking back, watching Netflix with her new daughter, Clowance (a name that only Morwenna's mom and \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-768x540.jpg\">this lover of jumbling random syllables\u003c/a> could love). Ross comes in and finds Demelza making this cause-I-slay face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/marie-antoinette-bed-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96787\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/marie-antoinette-bed-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross can't believe she was able to deliver her own baby. Demelza responds:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/what-like-its-hard-legally-blonde-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96788\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/what-like-its-hard-legally-blonde-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"145\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At chez Malfoy, Elizabeth continues to refuse to touch Valentine. Haters gonna hate, sociopaths gonna sociopath.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere, the throuple of Drake, Morwenna, and Geoffrey Charles becomes a fourple with the inclusion of Agatha. There's apparently enough of Drake to go around, which Agatha is more than pleased to know. I mean, just look at the way she looks at him:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96792\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-1020x498.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"312\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-160x78.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-800x391.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-768x375.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-960x469.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-240x117.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-375x183.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-520x254.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Ross' place, Blondie excitedly tells Ross and Demelza that the Parliament Wannabe she refused to marry is going to pull some strings and have Doc released from the French prison-of-war camp. Ross and Demelza, who both know a thing or two about things never working out that easily, give her the \"Sure, Jan\" treatment.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/06/giphy.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-27656\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/06/giphy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"450\" height=\"254\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In France, Doc cauterizes the festering wounds of his fellow prisoners with a hot spoon, thinking to himself \u003cem>FML\u003c/em> and \u003cem>I miss Horace the Pug\u003c/em> (we all do; where is he?!??).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Channel-surfing back to \u003cem>Everybody Loves Drake\u003c/em>, news arrives that Morwenna has to go celebrate Christmas at Malfoy's new digs for a few weeks. Geoffrey Charles takes a break from cock-blocking by briefly leaving the room for a few seconds (finally!). This is your moment, Drake and Morwenna! Make out! Before it's too late!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96794\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/kiss-the-girl-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"273\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Drake leans in...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96793\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ariel-little-mermaid-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>... and kisses...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ariel-nodding-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96799\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ariel-nodding-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"415\" height=\"498\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>... her hand.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96797\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ariel-bangs-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"275\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But Morwenna is like, \u003cem>You know what? No. We're doing this.\u003c/em> She goes in for the kiss, and right before their lips touch... Geoffrey Charles comes running back in.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/kiss-the-girl-little-mermaid-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96795\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/kiss-the-girl-little-mermaid-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"282\" height=\"282\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that day, Sam scolds Drake for risking his immortal soul with all the hand-kissing. At least that's what I think he said. I couldn't hear over the sound of his wet half-nakedness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96800\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1018\" height=\"492\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM.png 1018w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-160x77.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-800x387.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-768x371.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-960x464.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-240x116.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-375x181.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-520x251.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1018px) 100vw, 1018px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Ross writes Agatha an invitation to Clowance's baptism. Upon delivery, Malfoy's Slytherin crony breaks the eleventh commandment (\u003cem>thou shalt not mess with another's snail mail\u003c/em>) and crumples the letter up!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/going-straight-to-hell-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96802\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/going-straight-to-hell-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fast forward to the baptism! (Time sure does fly when you're poor in the 18th century!) Morwenna and Drake send I-kiss-before-marriage looks back and forth across the church. Sam tries to expunge any signs of whoredom out of his brother by staring at the side of his face like a maniac.\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96804\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"312\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM.png 1016w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-160x78.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-800x391.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-768x375.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-960x469.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-240x117.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-375x183.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-520x254.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96803\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1018\" height=\"492\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM.png 1018w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-160x77.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-800x387.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-768x371.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-960x464.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-240x116.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-375x181.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-520x251.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1018px) 100vw, 1018px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza takes Morwenna to the side and explains the state of things: \u003cem>You're rich, my brother is poor. This will only end with both of you writing wistful Taylor Swift breakup songs. \u003c/em>Morwenna is too polite to bring up the fact that both Demelza and Ross and Blondie and Doc have cross-class marriages. Instead, she agrees to break up with Drake immediately.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But it's one thing to resolve to crush Drake's heart when he's not in eyesight; it's quite another to do it to his beautiful face. Morwenna tells him they need to stop seeing each other, each word becoming less convincing as Drake's cute mug gets closer and closer to hers, until THEY KISS WITHOUT GEOFFREY CHARLES WATCHING! Victory!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ariel-kiss-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96815\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ariel-kiss-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"278\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Meanwhile, in France, Doc is still poking at festering wounds, missing Horace (and Blondie too, I guess).\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">At chez Elizabeth, Malfoy is hosting a ball, but no super-rich people show up (boo hoo!), and the people who do look like they've just seen a \u003cem>Schindler's List\u003c/em> / \u003cem>Titanic\u003c/em> / \u003cem>Beaches\u003c/em> triple feature.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Right in front of Malfoy, Morwenna and Geoffrey Charles loudly talk about how they disobeyed his orders and secretly went to the baptism to hang out with Ross and co. I realize they're head over heels for Drake, and infatuation makes people do dumb things, but get it together! \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Geoffrey Charles also loudly proclaims that Valentine drools (figuratively, but also literally) and Clowance rules. \u003cem>How dare he diss my heir who's suspiciously too dark to actually be mine?!\u003c/em> Malfoy vows to send Geoffrey Charles off to boarding school, which means Drake and Morwenna might actually get to second base before they're 70!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/old-people-kissing-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96831\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/old-people-kissing-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"499\" height=\"260\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Back in the countryside, Ross figures out Agatha didn't come to the baptism because someone evil broke the eleventh commandment. He rides over there in a huff to spend some much-needed quality time. We're about to get this episode's New Reason to Love Agatha Above All Others™ in 3, 2, 1... \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\"Of course I never had your invitation! Do you think I'd miss a chance to drink port and eat heavy cake?!\" There it is! I hope Agatha lives as long as the Countess from \u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em> (a.k.a. forever).\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Apparently, Malfoy didn't get the Agatha-is-immortal memo 'cause he's trying to kill her by having his Slytherin cronies refuse to light fires for her in the dead of winter. Ross invites Agatha to come live with him, to which Agatha remarks, \"And lose the chance to torment him?! Nahhhh.\" Bonus New Reason to Love Agatha Above All Others™! Life is good.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Ross tells Agatha he feels bad that Geoffrey Charles has to deal with such a \"gamecock\" stepdad. Agatha asks, \u003cem>Uhhh, what about Valentine?,\u003c/em> and gives him this \u003cem>Girl, who are you kidding?\u003c/em> look:\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\"> \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96826\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-1020x561.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"352\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-1020x561.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-160x88.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-800x440.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-768x423.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-1920x1057.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-1180x649.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-960x528.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-240x132.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-375x206.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-520x286.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Back at the ball, Malfoy runs to Elizabeth and tattles about Morwenna and Geoffrey Charles attending the baptism. Elizabeth misses the point and gets furious that Ross has a new daughter. Don't worry, Liz, you can just kill this one with your germs too and never say sorry like last time. Never one to not dance on an infant's grave, Malfoy says this despicable thing: \"Let's hope they're less careless with this one.\"\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/Kristen-Wiig-pissed.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-38909\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/Kristen-Wiig-pissed.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"343\" height=\"194\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">They agree to punish Morwenna. With a hair shirt or by forcing her to sleep on a bed of nails or some other kind of medieval torture? Not quite, but close enough. They're going to force her to marry a gross goblin, who is drinking and flirting up a storm a mere week after his wife died.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Over at Ross' place, everyone is chowing down on a huge turkey and singing whatever the 18th-century \"Despacito\" equivalent is. Blondie wonders aloud what Doc is up to. Answer: watching his friends die and eating rats. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/eating-rat-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96832\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/eating-rat-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Later, Ross and friends head into town to pass out food to the starving (which turns out to be everyone). Ross devises a secret plan to pass out even more loafs of bread and heal leprosy with a single touch and stuff. Dear Ross, Jesus called, he wants his storyline back.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Demelza and Blondie get ready to play their part in the let's-stuff-everyone-with-bread plan by dressing up as \"highwaymen\" and getting ugly rich dudes to give them money. They enjoyed and signed onto my \u003cem>Thelma and Louise: The Prequel\u003c/em> pitch! Very exciting news, but not quite as exciting as the fact that HORACE THE PUG IS IN THE HOUSE!!! Look at him yawn and show off his beautiful curves!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96825\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-1020x561.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"352\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-1020x561.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-160x88.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-800x440.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-768x423.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-1920x1057.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-1180x649.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-960x528.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-240x132.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-375x206.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-520x286.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96824\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-1020x565.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"355\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-1020x565.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-160x89.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-800x443.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-768x425.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-1920x1063.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-1180x653.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-960x532.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-672x372.jpg 672w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-1038x576.jpg 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-240x133.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-375x208.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-520x288.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Back at Voldemort Headquarters, Elizabeth informs Morwenna that they sold her hand in marriage for a few bucks. When Morwenna begins to weep, Elizabeth shows off the gold medal she won in the Sociopath Olympics by asking, \"Do our kind thoughts displease you?\"\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Morwenna asks, \"Is it wrong to hope for love in a marriage? When you wed Frances, did you not marry for love?\" Elizabeth is like, \u003cem>LOL definitely not! Every time I marry, I do it for hard cash and to get a rise out of Ross, duh!\u003c/em> After she grows bored of pointing and laughing at Morwenna's pain, Elizabeth goes to her room, takes a shot of liquid Xanax and ignores Valentine some more.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">The following day, Gross Goblin salivates in front of Morwenna about the prospect of her raising his two daughters and \"comfort[ing] me as only a wife can.\" Morwenna runs from the room cause the vomit in her mouth has to go somewhere.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> I feel you, girl.\u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/gag-me.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96833\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/gag-me.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"464\" height=\"272\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Over at Millennials <3 Jesus headquarters, Ross and co. are passing out food to the poor, paid for by all the donations Thelma and Louise raised. Under the impression that the food was obtained illegally, Malfoy rides up to ruin everyone's day. Before he can say \u003cem>Ha ha! I'm still going to find a way to ensure that you all starve!\u003c/em>, Thelma and Louise let him know that he and his rich friends unwittingly made all of this possible. Ross follows up that slap with a \u003cem>Get the F off my land before I put your entire head into a blazing fireplace like last season\u003c/em>.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/home-alone-head-fire.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96834\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/home-alone-head-fire.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Over in France, Doc and friends are REALLY thirsty. The guards take bets on who will the be the next prisoner to die. Elizabeth should totally get an internship with them. I bet she'd fit right in.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">To get even with Ross, Malfoy closes the Poldark family mine, as if to say, \u003cem>The poor people you fed might not die of starvation, but these 70 poor workers will! Gotcha!\u003c/em> Way to make Voldemort smile with pride.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/voldemort-smile.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96836\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/voldemort-smile.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"636\" height=\"264\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Back in France, Doc finally has cause to celebrate! A friend that he's nursed back to health from the brink of death is going to live! But before he can get to the second y in YAAAAAYYYY!, a random French guard strolls over and shoots Doc's friend to death. Yikes! Remember when the darkest thing on this show was love triangle jealousy?\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Over in Cornwall, Ross just hires all the fired poor dudes. Huh, that was easy. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">On a muddy lane, Drake, Sam, and Demelza come across a carriage stuck in the mud, which is carrying... Morwenna! Drake is over the moon and one step closer to second base. Sam and all the apostles strongly disapprove.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/everything-is-ungodly.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96827\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/everything-is-ungodly.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"165\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">In the city, Malfoy calls Gross Goblin \"a reptile and a prig,\" and smiles at the thought of still forcing Morwenna to marry him. Cut to a scene absolutely no one asked for, in which a tailor accidentally bumps Gross Goblin's testicles.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/my-eyes.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96828\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/my-eyes.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"272\" height=\"220\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">On their secret sexy beach, Drake and Morwenna run in slow motion towards each other. Geoffrey Charles is nowhere to be seen. Is this a dream? Could this really be? \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">It could! They smash their faces into each other and feel each other up. Second base at long last.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: Murderous French guard.\u003c/strong> \u003ca href=\"https://fat.gfycat.com/SpeedySmoothFennecfox.gif\">Be cool. Don't be all, like, uncool.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: \u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Geoffrey Charles. \u003c/span>\u003c/strong>\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">I think Etta James' \"At Last\" is about him finally taking the hint and staying home for once. Good going!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>BRONZE: Horace the Pug.\u003c/strong> Glad to have you back, you beautiful being you. Can't wait to watch you yawn some more next week.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>SILVER: Demelza. \u003c/strong>She can deliver her own children, sing like Ariana Grande, and resist the urge to kill Ross every time he deserves it (usually three times a week). Is there anything she can't do?\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>GOLD: Agatha.\u003c/strong> This could have gone to Ross for helping more poor people than Mother Teresa in a single day, but Agatha's love of booze, cake, and risking her life just for the opportunity to be petty is so relatable and deserves something shiny.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, or read all my \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> recaps\u003c/a> below!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/08/poldark-season-3-episode-2-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi/\">'Poldark' Season 3 Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-vous Coucher Avec Moi?\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/02/poldark-season-3-premiere-recap-same-old-mistakes/\">‘Poldark’ Season 3 Premiere Recap: Same Old Mistakes\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/27/poldark-season-2-finale-recap-burn-baby-burn/\">‘Poldark’ Season 2 Finale Recap: Burn Baby Burn\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/20/poldark-season-2-episode-8-recap-man-i-feel-like-a-woman/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 8 Recap: Man! I Feel Like A Woman!\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7 Recap: I'm In Love With A Monster\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/19/poldark-season-1-premiere-recap-stayin-alive/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1 Premiere Recap: Stayin’ Alive\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "A birth, a death, a trip to second base, and a rat dinner, all play a part in this week's 'Poldark.'",
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"title": "'Poldark' Season 3 Episode 3 Recap: Kiss the Girl | KQED",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/08/poldark-season-3-episode-2-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi/\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Ross was really terrible at spying in France and almost got guillotined. Will he risk his neck one more time to save Doc and his new beard? Will Drake and Morwenna finally make out (with Geoffrey Charles awkwardly watching, of course)? Will \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM.png\">Demelza and Blondie star in \u003cem>Thelma and Louise: The Prequel\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, even though their husbands aren't dead? Will Agatha let out another \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/916919639166246912?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fww2.kqed.org%2Fpop%2F2017%2F10%2F08%2Fpoldark-season-3-episode-2-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi%2F\">cute, prolonged fart\u003c/a>? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>How many minutes into this week's episode before something terrible happens to poor people? Answer: Not even one! Cold and starving, a few villagers snag some grain from one of Malfoy's boats so they don't have to die. They die anyway because soldiers shoot them in the street. The ones that survive are sentenced to fifteen years by Malfoy. Someone hold me back.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/scrappy-doo.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96771\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/scrappy-doo.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"320\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Demelza is doing manual labor while \u003cem>being in \u003c/em>labor. Now that Doc is a French captive and the only other doctor in town always manages to kill people by accident, Demelza has decided to secretly do it herself. I am still very emotional over the last time a Masterpiece show killed off a birthing mother (rest in power forever and always, Sybil from \u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>; I hope you're \u003ca href=\"http://recollections.biz/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/lady-sybil-blue-harem-pants-dowton.jpg\">wearing cool harem pants\u003c/a> in heaven), so here's hoping the writers leave Demelza -- and Valentine's new half-sibling -- alone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On a cliffside, Ross tsk-tsks as sick workers from the mine he sold to Malfoy cart off a dead colleague. Not one to miss an opportunity to gloat over the corpse of a poor person, Malfoy materializes and picks a fight by calling Ross a copper mine, \"full of noise but ultimately lacking in substance.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/tinf.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96786\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/tinf.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"240\" height=\"180\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When that barb falls flat, he tries poking at an old, very tired wound:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"How do you sleep at night?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Malfoy:\u003c/strong> \"Perhaps you should ask Elizabeth.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As with all things relating to Elizabeth, Ross instantly hears the \u003cem>Kill Bill\u003c/em> I'm-so-going-to-murder-you-right-now music in his head.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/cOy6hqzfsAs'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/cOy6hqzfsAs'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>But Ross' friend reminds him of Michelle Obama's aphorism, \"When they go low, we go high.\" Ross forces himself to stop fantasizing about putting a knife in Malfoy's eyeball and decides to wait 'til the season finale to murder him instead. A fine compromise!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross heads home and can't find Demelza anywhere. Please don't be dead. Please don't be dead. Please don't be dead.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She's not! She's casually kicking back, watching Netflix with her new daughter, Clowance (a name that only Morwenna's mom and \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-768x540.jpg\">this lover of jumbling random syllables\u003c/a> could love). Ross comes in and finds Demelza making this cause-I-slay face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/marie-antoinette-bed-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96787\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/marie-antoinette-bed-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross can't believe she was able to deliver her own baby. Demelza responds:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/what-like-its-hard-legally-blonde-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96788\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/what-like-its-hard-legally-blonde-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"145\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At chez Malfoy, Elizabeth continues to refuse to touch Valentine. Haters gonna hate, sociopaths gonna sociopath.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere, the throuple of Drake, Morwenna, and Geoffrey Charles becomes a fourple with the inclusion of Agatha. There's apparently enough of Drake to go around, which Agatha is more than pleased to know. I mean, just look at the way she looks at him:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96792\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-1020x498.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"312\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-160x78.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-800x391.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-768x375.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-960x469.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-240x117.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-375x183.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/agatha-heart-eyes-520x254.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Ross' place, Blondie excitedly tells Ross and Demelza that the Parliament Wannabe she refused to marry is going to pull some strings and have Doc released from the French prison-of-war camp. Ross and Demelza, who both know a thing or two about things never working out that easily, give her the \"Sure, Jan\" treatment.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/06/giphy.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-27656\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/06/giphy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"450\" height=\"254\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In France, Doc cauterizes the festering wounds of his fellow prisoners with a hot spoon, thinking to himself \u003cem>FML\u003c/em> and \u003cem>I miss Horace the Pug\u003c/em> (we all do; where is he?!??).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Channel-surfing back to \u003cem>Everybody Loves Drake\u003c/em>, news arrives that Morwenna has to go celebrate Christmas at Malfoy's new digs for a few weeks. Geoffrey Charles takes a break from cock-blocking by briefly leaving the room for a few seconds (finally!). This is your moment, Drake and Morwenna! Make out! Before it's too late!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96794\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/kiss-the-girl-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"273\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Drake leans in...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96793\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ariel-little-mermaid-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>... and kisses...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ariel-nodding-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96799\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ariel-nodding-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"415\" height=\"498\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>... her hand.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96797\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ariel-bangs-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"275\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But Morwenna is like, \u003cem>You know what? No. We're doing this.\u003c/em> She goes in for the kiss, and right before their lips touch... Geoffrey Charles comes running back in.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/kiss-the-girl-little-mermaid-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96795\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/kiss-the-girl-little-mermaid-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"282\" height=\"282\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that day, Sam scolds Drake for risking his immortal soul with all the hand-kissing. At least that's what I think he said. I couldn't hear over the sound of his wet half-nakedness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96800\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1018\" height=\"492\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM.png 1018w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-160x77.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-800x387.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-768x371.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-960x464.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-240x116.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-375x181.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-4.57.20-PM-520x251.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1018px) 100vw, 1018px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Ross writes Agatha an invitation to Clowance's baptism. Upon delivery, Malfoy's Slytherin crony breaks the eleventh commandment (\u003cem>thou shalt not mess with another's snail mail\u003c/em>) and crumples the letter up!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/going-straight-to-hell-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96802\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/going-straight-to-hell-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fast forward to the baptism! (Time sure does fly when you're poor in the 18th century!) Morwenna and Drake send I-kiss-before-marriage looks back and forth across the church. Sam tries to expunge any signs of whoredom out of his brother by staring at the side of his face like a maniac.\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96804\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"312\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM.png 1016w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-160x78.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-800x391.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-768x375.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-960x469.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-240x117.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-375x183.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.25.31-PM-520x254.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96803\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1018\" height=\"492\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM.png 1018w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-160x77.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-800x387.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-768x371.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-960x464.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-240x116.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-375x181.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-12-at-5.28.01-PM-520x251.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1018px) 100vw, 1018px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza takes Morwenna to the side and explains the state of things: \u003cem>You're rich, my brother is poor. This will only end with both of you writing wistful Taylor Swift breakup songs. \u003c/em>Morwenna is too polite to bring up the fact that both Demelza and Ross and Blondie and Doc have cross-class marriages. Instead, she agrees to break up with Drake immediately.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But it's one thing to resolve to crush Drake's heart when he's not in eyesight; it's quite another to do it to his beautiful face. Morwenna tells him they need to stop seeing each other, each word becoming less convincing as Drake's cute mug gets closer and closer to hers, until THEY KISS WITHOUT GEOFFREY CHARLES WATCHING! Victory!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ariel-kiss-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96815\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ariel-kiss-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"278\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Meanwhile, in France, Doc is still poking at festering wounds, missing Horace (and Blondie too, I guess).\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">At chez Elizabeth, Malfoy is hosting a ball, but no super-rich people show up (boo hoo!), and the people who do look like they've just seen a \u003cem>Schindler's List\u003c/em> / \u003cem>Titanic\u003c/em> / \u003cem>Beaches\u003c/em> triple feature.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Right in front of Malfoy, Morwenna and Geoffrey Charles loudly talk about how they disobeyed his orders and secretly went to the baptism to hang out with Ross and co. I realize they're head over heels for Drake, and infatuation makes people do dumb things, but get it together! \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Geoffrey Charles also loudly proclaims that Valentine drools (figuratively, but also literally) and Clowance rules. \u003cem>How dare he diss my heir who's suspiciously too dark to actually be mine?!\u003c/em> Malfoy vows to send Geoffrey Charles off to boarding school, which means Drake and Morwenna might actually get to second base before they're 70!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/old-people-kissing-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96831\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/old-people-kissing-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"499\" height=\"260\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Back in the countryside, Ross figures out Agatha didn't come to the baptism because someone evil broke the eleventh commandment. He rides over there in a huff to spend some much-needed quality time. We're about to get this episode's New Reason to Love Agatha Above All Others™ in 3, 2, 1... \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\"Of course I never had your invitation! Do you think I'd miss a chance to drink port and eat heavy cake?!\" There it is! I hope Agatha lives as long as the Countess from \u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em> (a.k.a. forever).\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Apparently, Malfoy didn't get the Agatha-is-immortal memo 'cause he's trying to kill her by having his Slytherin cronies refuse to light fires for her in the dead of winter. Ross invites Agatha to come live with him, to which Agatha remarks, \"And lose the chance to torment him?! Nahhhh.\" Bonus New Reason to Love Agatha Above All Others™! Life is good.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Ross tells Agatha he feels bad that Geoffrey Charles has to deal with such a \"gamecock\" stepdad. Agatha asks, \u003cem>Uhhh, what about Valentine?,\u003c/em> and gives him this \u003cem>Girl, who are you kidding?\u003c/em> look:\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\"> \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96826\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-1020x561.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"352\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-1020x561.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-160x88.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-800x440.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-768x423.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-1920x1057.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-1180x649.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-960x528.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-240x132.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-375x206.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag-520x286.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/ag.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Back at the ball, Malfoy runs to Elizabeth and tattles about Morwenna and Geoffrey Charles attending the baptism. Elizabeth misses the point and gets furious that Ross has a new daughter. Don't worry, Liz, you can just kill this one with your germs too and never say sorry like last time. Never one to not dance on an infant's grave, Malfoy says this despicable thing: \"Let's hope they're less careless with this one.\"\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/Kristen-Wiig-pissed.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-38909\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/Kristen-Wiig-pissed.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"343\" height=\"194\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">They agree to punish Morwenna. With a hair shirt or by forcing her to sleep on a bed of nails or some other kind of medieval torture? Not quite, but close enough. They're going to force her to marry a gross goblin, who is drinking and flirting up a storm a mere week after his wife died.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Over at Ross' place, everyone is chowing down on a huge turkey and singing whatever the 18th-century \"Despacito\" equivalent is. Blondie wonders aloud what Doc is up to. Answer: watching his friends die and eating rats. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/eating-rat-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96832\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/eating-rat-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Later, Ross and friends head into town to pass out food to the starving (which turns out to be everyone). Ross devises a secret plan to pass out even more loafs of bread and heal leprosy with a single touch and stuff. Dear Ross, Jesus called, he wants his storyline back.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Demelza and Blondie get ready to play their part in the let's-stuff-everyone-with-bread plan by dressing up as \"highwaymen\" and getting ugly rich dudes to give them money. They enjoyed and signed onto my \u003cem>Thelma and Louise: The Prequel\u003c/em> pitch! Very exciting news, but not quite as exciting as the fact that HORACE THE PUG IS IN THE HOUSE!!! Look at him yawn and show off his beautiful curves!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96825\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-1020x561.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"352\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-1020x561.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-160x88.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-800x440.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-768x423.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-1920x1057.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-1180x649.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-960x528.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-240x132.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-375x206.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy-520x286.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-copy.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96824\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-1020x565.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"355\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-1020x565.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-160x89.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-800x443.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-768x425.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-1920x1063.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-1180x653.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-960x532.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-672x372.jpg 672w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-1038x576.jpg 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-240x133.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-375x208.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy-520x288.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-3-copy.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Back at Voldemort Headquarters, Elizabeth informs Morwenna that they sold her hand in marriage for a few bucks. When Morwenna begins to weep, Elizabeth shows off the gold medal she won in the Sociopath Olympics by asking, \"Do our kind thoughts displease you?\"\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Morwenna asks, \"Is it wrong to hope for love in a marriage? When you wed Frances, did you not marry for love?\" Elizabeth is like, \u003cem>LOL definitely not! Every time I marry, I do it for hard cash and to get a rise out of Ross, duh!\u003c/em> After she grows bored of pointing and laughing at Morwenna's pain, Elizabeth goes to her room, takes a shot of liquid Xanax and ignores Valentine some more.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">The following day, Gross Goblin salivates in front of Morwenna about the prospect of her raising his two daughters and \"comfort[ing] me as only a wife can.\" Morwenna runs from the room cause the vomit in her mouth has to go somewhere.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> I feel you, girl.\u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/gag-me.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96833\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/gag-me.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"464\" height=\"272\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Over at Millennials <3 Jesus headquarters, Ross and co. are passing out food to the poor, paid for by all the donations Thelma and Louise raised. Under the impression that the food was obtained illegally, Malfoy rides up to ruin everyone's day. Before he can say \u003cem>Ha ha! I'm still going to find a way to ensure that you all starve!\u003c/em>, Thelma and Louise let him know that he and his rich friends unwittingly made all of this possible. Ross follows up that slap with a \u003cem>Get the F off my land before I put your entire head into a blazing fireplace like last season\u003c/em>.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/home-alone-head-fire.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96834\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/home-alone-head-fire.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Over in France, Doc and friends are REALLY thirsty. The guards take bets on who will the be the next prisoner to die. Elizabeth should totally get an internship with them. I bet she'd fit right in.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">To get even with Ross, Malfoy closes the Poldark family mine, as if to say, \u003cem>The poor people you fed might not die of starvation, but these 70 poor workers will! Gotcha!\u003c/em> Way to make Voldemort smile with pride.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/voldemort-smile.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96836\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/voldemort-smile.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"636\" height=\"264\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Back in France, Doc finally has cause to celebrate! A friend that he's nursed back to health from the brink of death is going to live! But before he can get to the second y in YAAAAAYYYY!, a random French guard strolls over and shoots Doc's friend to death. Yikes! Remember when the darkest thing on this show was love triangle jealousy?\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Over in Cornwall, Ross just hires all the fired poor dudes. Huh, that was easy. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">On a muddy lane, Drake, Sam, and Demelza come across a carriage stuck in the mud, which is carrying... Morwenna! Drake is over the moon and one step closer to second base. Sam and all the apostles strongly disapprove.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/everything-is-ungodly.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96827\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/everything-is-ungodly.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"165\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">In the city, Malfoy calls Gross Goblin \"a reptile and a prig,\" and smiles at the thought of still forcing Morwenna to marry him. Cut to a scene absolutely no one asked for, in which a tailor accidentally bumps Gross Goblin's testicles.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/my-eyes.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96828\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/my-eyes.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"272\" height=\"220\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">On their secret sexy beach, Drake and Morwenna run in slow motion towards each other. Geoffrey Charles is nowhere to be seen. Is this a dream? Could this really be? \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">It could! They smash their faces into each other and feel each other up. Second base at long last.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: Murderous French guard.\u003c/strong> \u003ca href=\"https://fat.gfycat.com/SpeedySmoothFennecfox.gif\">Be cool. Don't be all, like, uncool.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: \u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">Geoffrey Charles. \u003c/span>\u003c/strong>\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">I think Etta James' \"At Last\" is about him finally taking the hint and staying home for once. Good going!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>BRONZE: Horace the Pug.\u003c/strong> Glad to have you back, you beautiful being you. Can't wait to watch you yawn some more next week.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>SILVER: Demelza. \u003c/strong>She can deliver her own children, sing like Ariana Grande, and resist the urge to kill Ross every time he deserves it (usually three times a week). Is there anything she can't do?\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>GOLD: Agatha.\u003c/strong> This could have gone to Ross for helping more poor people than Mother Teresa in a single day, but Agatha's love of booze, cake, and risking her life just for the opportunity to be petty is so relatable and deserves something shiny.\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, or read all my \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> recaps\u003c/a> below!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/08/poldark-season-3-episode-2-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi/\">'Poldark' Season 3 Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-vous Coucher Avec Moi?\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/02/poldark-season-3-premiere-recap-same-old-mistakes/\">‘Poldark’ Season 3 Premiere Recap: Same Old Mistakes\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/27/poldark-season-2-finale-recap-burn-baby-burn/\">‘Poldark’ Season 2 Finale Recap: Burn Baby Burn\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/20/poldark-season-2-episode-8-recap-man-i-feel-like-a-woman/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 8 Recap: Man! I Feel Like A Woman!\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7 Recap: I'm In Love With A Monster\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"disqusTitle": "Drama World Series: Will Your Fave Make It Through the Semi-Final?",
"title": "Drama World Series: Will Your Fave Make It Through the Semi-Final?",
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"content": "\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/04/drama-world-series-vote-for-your-favorite-tv-show/\">Last week\u003c/a>, we kicked off the Drama World Series, a three-week bracket smackdown between eight of your most beloved TV shows. We've tallied your votes and are one step closer to finding out which competitor will win an all-day marathon on KQED PLUS on Sunday, October 29, 2017.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before we get to this week's matchups, let's take a moment to pour one out for our fallen heroes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> lost by less than one percentage point to \u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>. Putin strikes again?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/demelza-ross-poldark-sad-cry-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-96654\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/demelza-ross-poldark-sad-cry-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"362\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Poor \u003cem>Anne of Green Gables\u003c/em> didn't stand a chance against the Countess and everyone else at \u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>, only managing 24% of the vote.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/giphy_wazttz.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96653\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/giphy_wazttz.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"460\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sherlock's cheekbones and upturned collar proved to be cooler than \u003cem>Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/miss-fisher-mysteries-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96655\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/miss-fisher-mysteries-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And, perhaps with a little help from above,\u003cem> Grantchester's\u003c/em> sexy vicar\u003cem> \u003c/em>managed to defeat \u003cem>Prime Suspect\u003c/em>’s Helen Mirren.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/051b923e0f7db97ff369852fc37d86fb.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96656\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/051b923e0f7db97ff369852fc37d86fb.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"357\" height=\"313\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Which brings us to this week's semi-final! Let your voice be heard!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96657\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-1020x1020.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-1020x1020.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-160x160.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-800x800.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-768x768.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-1920x1920.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-1180x1180.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-960x960.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-240x240.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-375x375.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-520x520.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-32x32.jpg 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-50x50.jpg 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-64x64.jpg 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-96x96.jpg 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-128x128.jpg 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=9847429]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96658\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-1020x1020.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-1020x1020.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-160x160.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-800x800.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-768x768.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-1920x1920.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-1180x1180.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-960x960.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-240x240.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-375x375.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-520x520.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-32x32.jpg 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-50x50.jpg 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-64x64.jpg 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-96x96.jpg 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-128x128.jpg 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=\"9847435\"]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Make sure to come back next Monday to find out the results and vote in the final! Need to kill time between now and then? \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Catch up on our recaps\u003c/a> of \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria/\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, and \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey/\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/04/drama-world-series-vote-for-your-favorite-tv-show/\">Last week\u003c/a>, we kicked off the Drama World Series, a three-week bracket smackdown between eight of your most beloved TV shows. We've tallied your votes and are one step closer to finding out which competitor will win an all-day marathon on KQED PLUS on Sunday, October 29, 2017.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before we get to this week's matchups, let's take a moment to pour one out for our fallen heroes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> lost by less than one percentage point to \u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>. Putin strikes again?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/demelza-ross-poldark-sad-cry-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-96654\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/demelza-ross-poldark-sad-cry-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"362\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Poor \u003cem>Anne of Green Gables\u003c/em> didn't stand a chance against the Countess and everyone else at \u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>, only managing 24% of the vote.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/giphy_wazttz.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96653\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/giphy_wazttz.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"460\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sherlock's cheekbones and upturned collar proved to be cooler than \u003cem>Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/miss-fisher-mysteries-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96655\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/miss-fisher-mysteries-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And, perhaps with a little help from above,\u003cem> Grantchester's\u003c/em> sexy vicar\u003cem> \u003c/em>managed to defeat \u003cem>Prime Suspect\u003c/em>’s Helen Mirren.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/051b923e0f7db97ff369852fc37d86fb.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96656\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/051b923e0f7db97ff369852fc37d86fb.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"357\" height=\"313\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Which brings us to this week's semi-final! Let your voice be heard!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96657\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-1020x1020.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-1020x1020.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-160x160.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-800x800.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-768x768.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-1920x1920.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-1180x1180.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-960x960.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-240x240.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-375x375.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-520x520.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-32x32.jpg 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-50x50.jpg 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-64x64.jpg 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-96x96.jpg 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-128x128.jpg 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-vic-da-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=9847429]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96658\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-1020x1020.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-1020x1020.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-160x160.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-800x800.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-768x768.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-1920x1920.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-1180x1180.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-960x960.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-240x240.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-375x375.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-520x520.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-32x32.jpg 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-50x50.jpg 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-64x64.jpg 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-96x96.jpg 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-128x128.jpg 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/dws-grant-sherlock-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=\"9847435\"]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Make sure to come back next Monday to find out the results and vote in the final! Need to kill time between now and then? \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Catch up on our recaps\u003c/a> of \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria/\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, and \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey/\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Poldark' Season 3 Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-vous Coucher Avec Moi?",
"title": "'Poldark' Season 3 Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-vous Coucher Avec Moi?",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/02/poldark-season-3-premiere-recap-same-old-mistakes/\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Doc got married, delivered a baby, \u003cem>and\u003c/em> got captured by French revolutionaries (slow your roll, dude!). Will his captors spare his pretty face? Will Ross lose a hand and turn the bones into a maraca, like his pirate friend? Will Elizabeth stop bullying her newborn baby? Will Demelza's hot brothers take their shirts off some more? Will Horace the Pug do something cute? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza stands at the edge of a beautiful vista with her son. Is she showing him the finer points of taking a panorama shot worth at least 100 Instagram likes? No, just wondering aloud if Ross has gotten himself killed yet again (her default setting). From now on, drink every time Demelza makes a scrunched-up, worried face while cursing Ross in her head for making her life so stressful (you might not be coherent by the end of this recap, but you only live once, right?).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over in France, Ross and Bone Maraca Pirate look around and see a Brit taking a rifle to the face next to a bloody, dripping guillotine. Both think, \u003cem>Okay, maybe we didn't think this plan all the way through.\u003c/em> They also think this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mom-can-you-pick-me-up-im-scared-mean-girls-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96604\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mom-can-you-pick-me-up-im-scared-mean-girls-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"300\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in Cornwall, Malfoy is cranky again. What's he whining about this time?\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>Elizabeth, can you stop acknowledging the existence of poor people by saying hi? Why can't you be an obedient wife and just send them a withering look that translates to \u003c/em>I hope you die in a muddy gutter\u003cem> like I always do? Wahhh!\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>Ugh, Demelza's brothers are trolling me by loudly singing right outside of my church! They don't love Jesus like I love Jesus! Actually, \u003c/em>I\u003cem> am Jesus and they are Judas! They are \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suppressive_Person\">suppressive people\u003c/a>! Wahhhhh!\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>Ewww! Look at those unwashed village children showing us their teeth. Wait, what? That's called smiling? I hate it! Ban smiling! Wahhhhhhhh!\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>Back in France, Ross is really bad at this whole laying-low-in-order-to-keep-one's-head-attached-to-one's-body thing. He's just standing in the middle of a square, looking very lost and very British. On top of this, he gawks every time a revolutionary slits someone's throat or beats a helpless woman. One of said revolutionaries finally is like, \"DUDE, WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?\" (I know that's what he said 'cause I'm fancy and took a few French classes in college.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/bonjour-raven-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96638\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/bonjour-raven-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"236\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Eventually, a little boy runs up and gives Ross a note that says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Hey. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>I was going to wait until the coast was clear to contact you, but wow, you really suck at this, so go to this location and try not to get us all killed. K?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Sincerely, \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Kindergartener Who's Better at Being a Spy Than You \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at home, one of Ross' friends tells Demelza that Ross' genius let's-just-ride-on-over-to-wartime-France-and-free-a-heavily-guarded-prisoner plan isn't going well. Demelza responds succinctly and emphatically with one of these:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/michelle-tanner-duh-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96608\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/michelle-tanner-duh-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"700\" height=\"526\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in France, Ross kills time while waiting for another contact by eyeing up a hot waitress. He wonders if it would be totally inappropriate to cheat on Demelza again. What's one more betrayal, right? Bone Maraca Pirate channels his inner Hilary Duff and gives Ross a look that says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/why-not-duff.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96609\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/why-not-duff.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On a beach somewhere, Geoffrey Charles is the awkward third wheel on yet another Drake / Morwenna date. They look at each other adoringly and then look away and then look back at each other for several hours. I pop out from behind a rock and shout the following:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/just-kiss-you-morons-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96611\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/just-kiss-you-morons-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Every episode, Agatha does something super random and wonderful that makes me fall in love with her all over again (see: last episode's \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/914746367263698945\">weird burp thing\u003c/a> or \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/792923043731345408\">this great eye roll\u003c/a> or \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/792875375730630657\">the time she said \"Fiddlesticks!\"\u003c/a> or the time she burst into a room and yelled, \"Where's my port?!\" to no one in particular). So what will it be this week?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/916919639166246912\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A cute, prolonged fart! Mission accomplished!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Agatha calls out Geoffrey Charles on his secret beach trip by pointing out all the sand in his hair, on his face, and on his shoes. Amateur. \"You have to be sharp to out-trump me, boy!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/nicole-richie-know-everything-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96613\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/nicole-richie-know-everything-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"278\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elizabeth pops in to say, \u003cem>Never go to Ross' beach ever again! I hate him for no good reason now, remember?\u003c/em> Geoffrey Charles expertly gets out of being grounded by commenting on how much darker his new baby brother is than he should be.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/oooh-scandal-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96614\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/oooh-scandal-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"180\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in France, Ross tells Bone Maraca Pirate that his philandering ways are behind him. No hot waitress this time. This makes Bone Maraca Pirate's inner Hilary Duff very sad.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/hilary-duff-cry-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96615\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/hilary-duff-cry-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross is soon contacted by a shady French dude who keeps taking his money in exchange for super vague, unhelpful information. I smell...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/980x.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96616\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/980x.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"600\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In Cornwall, Malfoy tries to get Elizabeth to accompany him to his first day on the bench as magistrate. \u003cem>Come watch me sentence innocent poor people to death! It'll be fun!\u003c/em> Elizabeth is like, \u003cem>Nah, it was boring when my last husband did it and it's boring now. I'm just gonna stay home and hate my... I mean, our... baby.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in France, Ross and Bone Maraca Pirate take a break from drinking to watch someone get their head guillotined right off. The hot waitress is nearby enjoying the bloodshed. Moments later, she approaches Ross and asks if she can go up to his room to see his \"papers.\" She says this while pushing a cord seductively into a bottle. Oh, my!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/pop-champagne-bottle-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96617\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/pop-champagne-bottle-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"244\" height=\"220\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/fran-drescher-gasp-clutch-pearls-gif.gif\">\u003cbr>\n\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96619\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/fran-drescher-gasp-clutch-pearls-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"347\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross lets Hot Waitress know that his cork already has a bottle. Awww.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of bottles, Demelza has that scrunched-up, worried look again! Drink up!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/kristen-wiig-drinking-downing-wine-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96643\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/kristen-wiig-drinking-downing-wine-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"211\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At court, Malfoy gets off on sentencing poor people to public floggings, telling Blondie that Doc is totally doornail dead, and taking back a building Drake and Sam turned into a church for Millennials. Agatha better step up her voodoo doll skills 'cause this jerk is on a roll.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Millennials for Christ headquarters, Drake and Sam are sad they can't sing hymns and kneel and drink cheap blood wine and whatever else people do at church. Sam says it's up to baby Jesus to help them now. Demelza is like, \u003cem>That's not a thing. Storming over to Elizabeth's house to make a scene is though! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in France, Hot Waitress can't believe Ross swiped left on her! She gets her revenge by calling the cops on him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/hater-raven-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96620\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/hater-raven-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"168\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They take Ross to a dark cellar and threaten to imprison or murder him. Ross makes it rain guineas and they quickly change their tune to \u003cem>Ok, cool, no imprisonment or guillotine, but GTFO of France by midnight (and don't forget your glass slipper on the way out).\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at chez Liz, Sam tries to make a deal with Elizabeth: S\u003cem>ave our hip DIY church and god will save your soul! \u003c/em>Elizabeth is like,\u003cem> That's not a thing, but I'll try.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, outside, Drake and Morwenna are doing their looking at each other and away and at each other thing again. This time, it's Geoffrey Charles, and not me, who pops out to basically say:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/just-kiss-you-morons-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96611\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/just-kiss-you-morons-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, Malfoy comes home gleeful about all the lives he's ruined. Plus, he got a compliment on his robe too! How nice. Elizabeth shares details of Sam's visit, and Malfoy can sense that she's thinking of poor folk as actual humans again. There's only one way to fix that: make it about Ross and wait for her inner monster to appear!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>My dead husband gave them the land. It would be wrong to unlawfully snatch it away from these hipsters for Christ.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Malfoy:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Sam is Demelza's brother. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>WHAT??? TWO DEGRESS FROM ROSS?? WHOM I HATE FOR NO GOOD REASON????? OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!!!! Oh, and yeah, totally take away their clubhouse too.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For those of you who leave comments asking why I hate Elizabeth, this is why.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Ross' house, Blondie is like, \u003cem>Ugh, Doc is totally dead. And we only got to have sex twice. \u003c/em>Demelza makes her scrunched-up, worried face again. Chugalug!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/amy-schumer-drinking-wine-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96639\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/amy-schumer-drinking-wine-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across the Channel, Ross is on a boat heading home. Bone Maraca Pirate is like, \u003cem>Phew! I totally thought I would have to make a new belt maraca with your entire skeleton in it! Glad we're sensible enough to know when to call it quits.\u003c/em> Ross is like, \u003cem>Me? Sensible? Never!!!\u003c/em> He runs to the edge of the ship and jumps. An idea as idiotic as this one:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jump-canonball-ice-ouch-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96623\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jump-canonball-ice-ouch-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Days later, Bone Maraca Pirate gives Demelza Ross' hat and tells her what she already knows: her husband is nuts. Demelza makes a scrunched-up, I'm-going-to-murder-him-with-my-own-two-hands face this time. Throw back a shot!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/buffy-take-shot-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96640\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/buffy-take-shot-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"350\" height=\"262\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Elizabeth is still on a tear about how much she hates Ross. We got the memo, girl. You can give it a rest now. Malfoy proposes a plan: Why don't they take baby Valentine and move to a different town? What a splendid idea! Could my dream of never seeing either of these characters again be realized? Was Sam right all along? Praying works?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jennifer-lawrence-praying-thank-god-jesus-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96641\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jennifer-lawrence-praying-thank-god-jesus-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"540\" height=\"494\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elizabeth pretends to care about leaving Geoffrey Charles behind, before quickly saying, \u003cem>Ah, F it, he'll make do. Let's move today, so I'll never have to see Ross ever again!\u003c/em> This is all very comical, considering that, not only did Ross have nothing to do with the Millennial Christians: UK Chapter, but he's currently hiding in a pile of French hay. Anyway, good riddance!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/snow-white-kiss-wave-bye-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96624\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/snow-white-kiss-wave-bye-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"454\" height=\"324\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Demelza is telling Drake that marriage is a bunch of BS. \"I promised to love, honor, and obey him. And why should I?\" Uh oh, is Demelza's \u003cem>Lemonade\u003c/em> era upon us?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Her first step toward creating a diss album about Ross is giving away one of his storehouses to the Millennials for Christ.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sam:\u003c/strong> \"Brother Ross won't like it.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"No more than I like certain antics of his. What's his is mine.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yass-beyonce.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96625\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yass-beyonce.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In France, Ross has managed to leave his pile of hay, thanks to a beanie that renders him invisible. He goes back to the same bar -- dude, maybe pick a different spot? -- and demands a list of prisoner names from his scammer co-conspirator. Alas, the beanie is not actually an invisibility cloak, and Hot Waitress turns him in yet again. \u003cem>You should have couchez'ed avec moi the other soir\u003c/em>, she scolds. Ross takes off his beanie, punches every male in his vicinity in the face, and skedaddles. Run, Forrest, run!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in Cornwall, Malfoy gets a letter from some rich dude that says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Sup? Could you let my son off the hook for assaulting a servant girl? Who cares, amirite? LOL. Thanks! P.S. Isn't classism fun? See you at court! 😉\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Elizabeth finally relents and goes to see Malfoy ruin lives in his pretty robe. He decides to make an example of the servant girl for \"perjury\" and for daring to stand up for her civil rights. Elizabeth is absolutely shocked by this injustice. I really don't get why she's constantly surprised by Malfoy's evil ways. He literally does at least one terrible thing every 7 minutes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/snap-out-of-it-cher-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96627\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/snap-out-of-it-cher-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"245\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere, Demelza (with scrunched-up, worried face in full effect; drink!) and Blondie agree that their husbands are most likely dead. But all is not lost! Now ball and chain free, they could hit the road and star in \u003cem>Thelma and Louise: The Prequel\u003c/em>!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96631\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-1020x740.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"464\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-1020x740.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-160x116.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-800x581.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-768x557.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-1180x856.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-960x697.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-240x174.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-375x272.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-520x377.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM.png 1196w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Elizabeth is randomly taking Xanax in liquid form, with a side of booze. It's lucky for her there's little to no heavy machinery invented yet for her to operate.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On the beach, Drake, Morwenna, and Geoffrey Charles are on yet another throuple date. Just leave him at home! Geez!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On the farm, a pregnant Demelza is picking up heavy pieces of wood and cursing Ross in her head... until she hears horse hooves. It's Ross! All is forgiven 'cause his curls have never looked better and his face isn't bad either!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/sailor-moon-heart-eyes.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96642\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/sailor-moon-heart-eyes.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"366\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross managed to snatch a list of British soldiers taken prisoner, and Doc's name is on it! What the list fails to mention is that Doc is rocking a killer beard now!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Jesus Lovers \"R\" Us, all the young, hip Christians are making sure their new space adheres to feng shui principles. A random girl shoots Drake a loaded look that says, \u003cem>I kiss before marriage\u003c/em>. Drake sends a look back that says, \u003cem>I'm flattered, but I'm already dating a girl and her eight-year-old companion, sorry!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, the yay-you-weren't-decapitated-in-France honeymoon period is over. Ross is chastising Demelza for letting her brothers turn his shed into a home base for their cult. Who gave her permission to do such a thing?! Season 1 Demelza might have allowed this kind of behavior, but Season 3 Demelza is not having it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"Other women may bow and scrape and ask permission, as I once did, but no longer.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yas-queen-ilana-broad-city-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96646\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yas-queen-ilana-broad-city-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"376\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And then something truly shocking happens. More shocking than Francis being murdered by a random puddle last season. More shocking than Horace the Pug not being in this episode.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">ROSS\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">ADMITS\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">HE'S\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">WRONG!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Ow0L1.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-96636\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Ow0L1.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"606\" height=\"432\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96633\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/danny.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mr-bean-tea-cup-drop-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96632\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mr-bean-tea-cup-drop-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"435\" height=\"245\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/bbQ3_f-maxage-0_s-200x150.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96634\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/bbQ3_f-maxage-0_s-200x150.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"150\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because this will probably never happen again, Demelza and Ross decide to celebrate this once-in-a-lifetime moment by having dirty sex.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, or read all my \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> recaps\u003c/a> below!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/02/poldark-season-3-premiere-recap-same-old-mistakes/\">'Poldark' Season 3 Premiere Recap: Same Old Mistakes\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/27/poldark-season-2-finale-recap-burn-baby-burn/\">‘Poldark’ Season 2 Finale Recap: Burn Baby Burn\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/20/poldark-season-2-episode-8-recap-man-i-feel-like-a-woman/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 8 Recap: Man! I Feel Like A Woman!\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7 Recap: I'm In Love With A Monster\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/19/poldark-season-1-premiere-recap-stayin-alive/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1 Premiere Recap: Stayin’ Alive\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "This week, it's the guillotine vs. Ross. Will he keep his head? (Note: this episode sadly has no cute pugs in it.)",
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"description": "This week, it's the guillotine vs. Ross. Will he keep his head? (Note: this episode sadly has no cute pugs in it.)",
"title": "'Poldark' Season 3 Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-vous Coucher Avec Moi? | KQED",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/02/poldark-season-3-premiere-recap-same-old-mistakes/\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Doc got married, delivered a baby, \u003cem>and\u003c/em> got captured by French revolutionaries (slow your roll, dude!). Will his captors spare his pretty face? Will Ross lose a hand and turn the bones into a maraca, like his pirate friend? Will Elizabeth stop bullying her newborn baby? Will Demelza's hot brothers take their shirts off some more? Will Horace the Pug do something cute? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza stands at the edge of a beautiful vista with her son. Is she showing him the finer points of taking a panorama shot worth at least 100 Instagram likes? No, just wondering aloud if Ross has gotten himself killed yet again (her default setting). From now on, drink every time Demelza makes a scrunched-up, worried face while cursing Ross in her head for making her life so stressful (you might not be coherent by the end of this recap, but you only live once, right?).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over in France, Ross and Bone Maraca Pirate look around and see a Brit taking a rifle to the face next to a bloody, dripping guillotine. Both think, \u003cem>Okay, maybe we didn't think this plan all the way through.\u003c/em> They also think this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mom-can-you-pick-me-up-im-scared-mean-girls-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96604\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mom-can-you-pick-me-up-im-scared-mean-girls-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"300\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in Cornwall, Malfoy is cranky again. What's he whining about this time?\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>Elizabeth, can you stop acknowledging the existence of poor people by saying hi? Why can't you be an obedient wife and just send them a withering look that translates to \u003c/em>I hope you die in a muddy gutter\u003cem> like I always do? Wahhh!\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>Ugh, Demelza's brothers are trolling me by loudly singing right outside of my church! They don't love Jesus like I love Jesus! Actually, \u003c/em>I\u003cem> am Jesus and they are Judas! They are \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suppressive_Person\">suppressive people\u003c/a>! Wahhhhh!\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>Ewww! Look at those unwashed village children showing us their teeth. Wait, what? That's called smiling? I hate it! Ban smiling! Wahhhhhhhh!\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>Back in France, Ross is really bad at this whole laying-low-in-order-to-keep-one's-head-attached-to-one's-body thing. He's just standing in the middle of a square, looking very lost and very British. On top of this, he gawks every time a revolutionary slits someone's throat or beats a helpless woman. One of said revolutionaries finally is like, \"DUDE, WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?\" (I know that's what he said 'cause I'm fancy and took a few French classes in college.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/bonjour-raven-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96638\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/bonjour-raven-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"236\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Eventually, a little boy runs up and gives Ross a note that says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Hey. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>I was going to wait until the coast was clear to contact you, but wow, you really suck at this, so go to this location and try not to get us all killed. K?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Sincerely, \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Kindergartener Who's Better at Being a Spy Than You \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at home, one of Ross' friends tells Demelza that Ross' genius let's-just-ride-on-over-to-wartime-France-and-free-a-heavily-guarded-prisoner plan isn't going well. Demelza responds succinctly and emphatically with one of these:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/michelle-tanner-duh-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96608\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/michelle-tanner-duh-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"700\" height=\"526\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in France, Ross kills time while waiting for another contact by eyeing up a hot waitress. He wonders if it would be totally inappropriate to cheat on Demelza again. What's one more betrayal, right? Bone Maraca Pirate channels his inner Hilary Duff and gives Ross a look that says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/why-not-duff.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96609\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/why-not-duff.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On a beach somewhere, Geoffrey Charles is the awkward third wheel on yet another Drake / Morwenna date. They look at each other adoringly and then look away and then look back at each other for several hours. I pop out from behind a rock and shout the following:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/just-kiss-you-morons-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96611\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/just-kiss-you-morons-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Every episode, Agatha does something super random and wonderful that makes me fall in love with her all over again (see: last episode's \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/914746367263698945\">weird burp thing\u003c/a> or \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/792923043731345408\">this great eye roll\u003c/a> or \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/792875375730630657\">the time she said \"Fiddlesticks!\"\u003c/a> or the time she burst into a room and yelled, \"Where's my port?!\" to no one in particular). So what will it be this week?\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>A cute, prolonged fart! Mission accomplished!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Agatha calls out Geoffrey Charles on his secret beach trip by pointing out all the sand in his hair, on his face, and on his shoes. Amateur. \"You have to be sharp to out-trump me, boy!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/nicole-richie-know-everything-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96613\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/nicole-richie-know-everything-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"278\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elizabeth pops in to say, \u003cem>Never go to Ross' beach ever again! I hate him for no good reason now, remember?\u003c/em> Geoffrey Charles expertly gets out of being grounded by commenting on how much darker his new baby brother is than he should be.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/oooh-scandal-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96614\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/oooh-scandal-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"180\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in France, Ross tells Bone Maraca Pirate that his philandering ways are behind him. No hot waitress this time. This makes Bone Maraca Pirate's inner Hilary Duff very sad.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/hilary-duff-cry-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96615\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/hilary-duff-cry-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross is soon contacted by a shady French dude who keeps taking his money in exchange for super vague, unhelpful information. I smell...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/980x.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96616\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/980x.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"600\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In Cornwall, Malfoy tries to get Elizabeth to accompany him to his first day on the bench as magistrate. \u003cem>Come watch me sentence innocent poor people to death! It'll be fun!\u003c/em> Elizabeth is like, \u003cem>Nah, it was boring when my last husband did it and it's boring now. I'm just gonna stay home and hate my... I mean, our... baby.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in France, Ross and Bone Maraca Pirate take a break from drinking to watch someone get their head guillotined right off. The hot waitress is nearby enjoying the bloodshed. Moments later, she approaches Ross and asks if she can go up to his room to see his \"papers.\" She says this while pushing a cord seductively into a bottle. Oh, my!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/pop-champagne-bottle-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96617\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/pop-champagne-bottle-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"244\" height=\"220\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/fran-drescher-gasp-clutch-pearls-gif.gif\">\u003cbr>\n\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96619\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/fran-drescher-gasp-clutch-pearls-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"347\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross lets Hot Waitress know that his cork already has a bottle. Awww.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of bottles, Demelza has that scrunched-up, worried look again! Drink up!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/kristen-wiig-drinking-downing-wine-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96643\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/kristen-wiig-drinking-downing-wine-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"211\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At court, Malfoy gets off on sentencing poor people to public floggings, telling Blondie that Doc is totally doornail dead, and taking back a building Drake and Sam turned into a church for Millennials. Agatha better step up her voodoo doll skills 'cause this jerk is on a roll.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Millennials for Christ headquarters, Drake and Sam are sad they can't sing hymns and kneel and drink cheap blood wine and whatever else people do at church. Sam says it's up to baby Jesus to help them now. Demelza is like, \u003cem>That's not a thing. Storming over to Elizabeth's house to make a scene is though! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in France, Hot Waitress can't believe Ross swiped left on her! She gets her revenge by calling the cops on him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/hater-raven-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96620\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/hater-raven-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"168\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They take Ross to a dark cellar and threaten to imprison or murder him. Ross makes it rain guineas and they quickly change their tune to \u003cem>Ok, cool, no imprisonment or guillotine, but GTFO of France by midnight (and don't forget your glass slipper on the way out).\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at chez Liz, Sam tries to make a deal with Elizabeth: S\u003cem>ave our hip DIY church and god will save your soul! \u003c/em>Elizabeth is like,\u003cem> That's not a thing, but I'll try.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, outside, Drake and Morwenna are doing their looking at each other and away and at each other thing again. This time, it's Geoffrey Charles, and not me, who pops out to basically say:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/just-kiss-you-morons-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96611\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/just-kiss-you-morons-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, Malfoy comes home gleeful about all the lives he's ruined. Plus, he got a compliment on his robe too! How nice. Elizabeth shares details of Sam's visit, and Malfoy can sense that she's thinking of poor folk as actual humans again. There's only one way to fix that: make it about Ross and wait for her inner monster to appear!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>My dead husband gave them the land. It would be wrong to unlawfully snatch it away from these hipsters for Christ.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Malfoy:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Sam is Demelza's brother. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>WHAT??? TWO DEGRESS FROM ROSS?? WHOM I HATE FOR NO GOOD REASON????? OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!!!! Oh, and yeah, totally take away their clubhouse too.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For those of you who leave comments asking why I hate Elizabeth, this is why.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Ross' house, Blondie is like, \u003cem>Ugh, Doc is totally dead. And we only got to have sex twice. \u003c/em>Demelza makes her scrunched-up, worried face again. Chugalug!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/amy-schumer-drinking-wine-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96639\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/amy-schumer-drinking-wine-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across the Channel, Ross is on a boat heading home. Bone Maraca Pirate is like, \u003cem>Phew! I totally thought I would have to make a new belt maraca with your entire skeleton in it! Glad we're sensible enough to know when to call it quits.\u003c/em> Ross is like, \u003cem>Me? Sensible? Never!!!\u003c/em> He runs to the edge of the ship and jumps. An idea as idiotic as this one:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jump-canonball-ice-ouch-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96623\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jump-canonball-ice-ouch-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Days later, Bone Maraca Pirate gives Demelza Ross' hat and tells her what she already knows: her husband is nuts. Demelza makes a scrunched-up, I'm-going-to-murder-him-with-my-own-two-hands face this time. Throw back a shot!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/buffy-take-shot-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96640\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/buffy-take-shot-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"350\" height=\"262\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Elizabeth is still on a tear about how much she hates Ross. We got the memo, girl. You can give it a rest now. Malfoy proposes a plan: Why don't they take baby Valentine and move to a different town? What a splendid idea! Could my dream of never seeing either of these characters again be realized? Was Sam right all along? Praying works?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jennifer-lawrence-praying-thank-god-jesus-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96641\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jennifer-lawrence-praying-thank-god-jesus-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"540\" height=\"494\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elizabeth pretends to care about leaving Geoffrey Charles behind, before quickly saying, \u003cem>Ah, F it, he'll make do. Let's move today, so I'll never have to see Ross ever again!\u003c/em> This is all very comical, considering that, not only did Ross have nothing to do with the Millennial Christians: UK Chapter, but he's currently hiding in a pile of French hay. Anyway, good riddance!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/snow-white-kiss-wave-bye-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96624\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/snow-white-kiss-wave-bye-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"454\" height=\"324\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Demelza is telling Drake that marriage is a bunch of BS. \"I promised to love, honor, and obey him. And why should I?\" Uh oh, is Demelza's \u003cem>Lemonade\u003c/em> era upon us?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Her first step toward creating a diss album about Ross is giving away one of his storehouses to the Millennials for Christ.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sam:\u003c/strong> \"Brother Ross won't like it.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"No more than I like certain antics of his. What's his is mine.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yass-beyonce.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96625\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yass-beyonce.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In France, Ross has managed to leave his pile of hay, thanks to a beanie that renders him invisible. He goes back to the same bar -- dude, maybe pick a different spot? -- and demands a list of prisoner names from his scammer co-conspirator. Alas, the beanie is not actually an invisibility cloak, and Hot Waitress turns him in yet again. \u003cem>You should have couchez'ed avec moi the other soir\u003c/em>, she scolds. Ross takes off his beanie, punches every male in his vicinity in the face, and skedaddles. Run, Forrest, run!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in Cornwall, Malfoy gets a letter from some rich dude that says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Sup? Could you let my son off the hook for assaulting a servant girl? Who cares, amirite? LOL. Thanks! P.S. Isn't classism fun? See you at court! 😉\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Elizabeth finally relents and goes to see Malfoy ruin lives in his pretty robe. He decides to make an example of the servant girl for \"perjury\" and for daring to stand up for her civil rights. Elizabeth is absolutely shocked by this injustice. I really don't get why she's constantly surprised by Malfoy's evil ways. He literally does at least one terrible thing every 7 minutes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/snap-out-of-it-cher-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96627\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/snap-out-of-it-cher-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"245\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere, Demelza (with scrunched-up, worried face in full effect; drink!) and Blondie agree that their husbands are most likely dead. But all is not lost! Now ball and chain free, they could hit the road and star in \u003cem>Thelma and Louise: The Prequel\u003c/em>!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96631\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-1020x740.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"464\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-1020x740.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-160x116.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-800x581.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-768x557.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-1180x856.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-960x697.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-240x174.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-375x272.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM-520x377.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-07-at-11.01.09-PM.png 1196w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Elizabeth is randomly taking Xanax in liquid form, with a side of booze. It's lucky for her there's little to no heavy machinery invented yet for her to operate.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On the beach, Drake, Morwenna, and Geoffrey Charles are on yet another throuple date. Just leave him at home! Geez!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On the farm, a pregnant Demelza is picking up heavy pieces of wood and cursing Ross in her head... until she hears horse hooves. It's Ross! All is forgiven 'cause his curls have never looked better and his face isn't bad either!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/sailor-moon-heart-eyes.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96642\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/sailor-moon-heart-eyes.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"366\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross managed to snatch a list of British soldiers taken prisoner, and Doc's name is on it! What the list fails to mention is that Doc is rocking a killer beard now!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Jesus Lovers \"R\" Us, all the young, hip Christians are making sure their new space adheres to feng shui principles. A random girl shoots Drake a loaded look that says, \u003cem>I kiss before marriage\u003c/em>. Drake sends a look back that says, \u003cem>I'm flattered, but I'm already dating a girl and her eight-year-old companion, sorry!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, the yay-you-weren't-decapitated-in-France honeymoon period is over. Ross is chastising Demelza for letting her brothers turn his shed into a home base for their cult. Who gave her permission to do such a thing?! Season 1 Demelza might have allowed this kind of behavior, but Season 3 Demelza is not having it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"Other women may bow and scrape and ask permission, as I once did, but no longer.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yas-queen-ilana-broad-city-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96646\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yas-queen-ilana-broad-city-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"376\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And then something truly shocking happens. More shocking than Francis being murdered by a random puddle last season. More shocking than Horace the Pug not being in this episode.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">ROSS\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">ADMITS\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">HE'S\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">WRONG!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Ow0L1.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-96636\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/Ow0L1.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"606\" height=\"432\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96633\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/danny.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mr-bean-tea-cup-drop-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96632\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mr-bean-tea-cup-drop-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"435\" height=\"245\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/bbQ3_f-maxage-0_s-200x150.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96634\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/bbQ3_f-maxage-0_s-200x150.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"150\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because this will probably never happen again, Demelza and Ross decide to celebrate this once-in-a-lifetime moment by having dirty sex.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, or read all my \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> recaps\u003c/a> below!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/10/02/poldark-season-3-premiere-recap-same-old-mistakes/\">'Poldark' Season 3 Premiere Recap: Same Old Mistakes\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/27/poldark-season-2-finale-recap-burn-baby-burn/\">‘Poldark’ Season 2 Finale Recap: Burn Baby Burn\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/20/poldark-season-2-episode-8-recap-man-i-feel-like-a-woman/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 8 Recap: Man! I Feel Like A Woman!\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7 Recap: I'm In Love With A Monster\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"disqusTitle": "Drama World Series: Vote for Your Favorite TV Show!",
"title": "Drama World Series: Vote for Your Favorite TV Show!",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>Championships! Parades! Tailgate booze fests! It seems like sports fans are always having all the fun. But what about those of us who prefer a well-crafted mystery or a clever period drama? Where's our competition worthy of eating guacamole and guzzling shots on a truck bed?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Questions like these inspired us to create the Drama World Series, a three-week bracket smackdown between eight of your most beloved television shows. The victor will get an all-day marathon on KQED PLUS on Sunday, October 29, 2017.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Representing \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">Poldark\u003c/a>\u003c/em>, Ross is shirtless (when isn't he?) and ready to rumble:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96447\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/5166520_15-reasons-why-poldarks-aidan-turner_t38c8705b.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"376\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But don't count out \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria/\">Victoria\u003c/a>. Have you seen her crumple a piece of paper to death?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96446\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/tumblr_olhydaoxNn1w10zz1o2_540.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"540\" height=\"241\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries’\u003c/em> namesake is armed, dangerous, and open to stabbing her opponent, if need be:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96448\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/stab3.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"306\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sherlock is understandably scared, but ready to kick his way to victory:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96449\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/tumblr_n770ozeVfB1rzik3go1_500.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"295\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Don't let Anne of Green Gables' youthful innocence fool you. She \u003cem>will\u003c/em> smash something over your head:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-96450\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/16204558.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"384\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey/\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey’\u003c/em>\u003c/a>s Dowager Countess would very much like to see her try:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96451\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/downtonfencing.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"540\" height=\"303\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Like Ross Poldark, \u003cem>Grantchester’\u003c/em>s Sidney is also hoping his shirtlessness gives him an advantage:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96453\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/grantchester-shirt-off.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"619\" height=\"382\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That doesn't impress \u003cem>Prime Suspect’\u003c/em>s Jane Tennison much:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-96452\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/tumblr_nkj4iqhIX81s1wohwo9_250.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"367\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So step up to the plate and vote for your favorite in this first round of matchups!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cimg class=\"size-full wp-image-96441 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1000\" height=\"1000\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1.png 1000w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-160x160.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-800x800.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-768x768.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-960x960.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-240x240.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-375x375.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-520x520.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-32x32.png 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-50x50.png 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-64x64.png 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-96x96.png 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-128x128.png 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-150x150.png 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=9841632]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-large wp-image-96442 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1.png 1000w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-160x160.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-800x800.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-768x768.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-960x960.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-240x240.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-375x375.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-520x520.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-32x32.png 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-50x50.png 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-64x64.png 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-96x96.png 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-128x128.png 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-150x150.png 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=9841613]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-large wp-image-96443 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1.png 1000w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-160x160.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-800x800.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-768x768.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-960x960.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-240x240.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-375x375.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-520x520.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-32x32.png 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-50x50.png 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-64x64.png 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-96x96.png 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-128x128.png 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-150x150.png 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=9841622]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-large wp-image-96444 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2.png 1000w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-160x160.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-800x800.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-768x768.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-960x960.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-240x240.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-375x375.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-520x520.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-32x32.png 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-50x50.png 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-64x64.png 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-96x96.png 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-128x128.png 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-150x150.png 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=9841626]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Make sure to come back on Monday to find out the results and vote in Round 2! Need to kill time between now and then? \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Catch up on our recaps\u003c/a> of \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria/\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, and \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey/\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Which of these eight beloved shows will win an all-day marathon on KQED?",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Championships! Parades! Tailgate booze fests! It seems like sports fans are always having all the fun. But what about those of us who prefer a well-crafted mystery or a clever period drama? Where's our competition worthy of eating guacamole and guzzling shots on a truck bed?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Questions like these inspired us to create the Drama World Series, a three-week bracket smackdown between eight of your most beloved television shows. The victor will get an all-day marathon on KQED PLUS on Sunday, October 29, 2017.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Representing \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">Poldark\u003c/a>\u003c/em>, Ross is shirtless (when isn't he?) and ready to rumble:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96447\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/5166520_15-reasons-why-poldarks-aidan-turner_t38c8705b.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"376\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But don't count out \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria/\">Victoria\u003c/a>. Have you seen her crumple a piece of paper to death?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96446\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/tumblr_olhydaoxNn1w10zz1o2_540.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"540\" height=\"241\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries’\u003c/em> namesake is armed, dangerous, and open to stabbing her opponent, if need be:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96448\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/stab3.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"306\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sherlock is understandably scared, but ready to kick his way to victory:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96449\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/tumblr_n770ozeVfB1rzik3go1_500.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"295\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Don't let Anne of Green Gables' youthful innocence fool you. She \u003cem>will\u003c/em> smash something over your head:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-96450\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/16204558.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"384\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey/\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey’\u003c/em>\u003c/a>s Dowager Countess would very much like to see her try:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96451\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/downtonfencing.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"540\" height=\"303\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Like Ross Poldark, \u003cem>Grantchester’\u003c/em>s Sidney is also hoping his shirtlessness gives him an advantage:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96453\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/grantchester-shirt-off.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"619\" height=\"382\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That doesn't impress \u003cem>Prime Suspect’\u003c/em>s Jane Tennison much:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-96452\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/tumblr_nkj4iqhIX81s1wohwo9_250.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"367\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So step up to the plate and vote for your favorite in this first round of matchups!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cimg class=\"size-full wp-image-96441 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1000\" height=\"1000\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1.png 1000w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-160x160.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-800x800.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-768x768.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-960x960.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-240x240.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-375x375.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-520x520.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-32x32.png 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-50x50.png 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-64x64.png 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-96x96.png 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-128x128.png 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Poldark_vs_Victoria-01-1-150x150.png 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=9841632]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-large wp-image-96442 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1.png 1000w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-160x160.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-800x800.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-768x768.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-960x960.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-240x240.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-375x375.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-520x520.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-32x32.png 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-50x50.png 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-64x64.png 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-96x96.png 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-128x128.png 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Miss_Fisher_vs_Sherlock-01-1-150x150.png 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=9841613]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-large wp-image-96443 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1.png 1000w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-160x160.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-800x800.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-768x768.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-960x960.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-240x240.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-375x375.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-520x520.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-32x32.png 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-50x50.png 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-64x64.png 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-96x96.png 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-128x128.png 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Anne_vs_Downton-01-1-150x150.png 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=9841622]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-large wp-image-96444 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2.png 1000w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-160x160.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-800x800.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-768x768.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-960x960.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-240x240.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-375x375.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-520x520.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-32x32.png 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-50x50.png 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-64x64.png 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-96x96.png 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-128x128.png 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/09/Prime_Suspects_vs_Grantchester-01-2-150x150.png 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[polldaddy poll=9841626]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Make sure to come back on Monday to find out the results and vote in Round 2! Need to kill time between now and then? \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Catch up on our recaps\u003c/a> of \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria/\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, and \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey/\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Poldark' Season 3 Premiere Recap: Same Old Mistakes",
"title": "'Poldark' Season 3 Premiere Recap: Same Old Mistakes",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>For those who have no idea what this show is about, I advise you to read \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">my previous recaps\u003c/a>. If you’re too busy or impatient for all of that, here’s the much-abbreviated gist:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross Poldark fought in the American Revolutionary War on the British side. As we know, things didn’t really work out. Presumed dead, his ex, Elizabeth, got with his lame cousin because there were apparently no other men around who flaked on the war. Ross returns alive and everyone is supremely inconvenienced by his not-deadness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross proceeds to spend a lot of time hanging out with poor people. He even marries one! His scullery maid, Demelza! And has a baby with her! But don’t get too excited; the baby dies of strep throat or something like that. Demelza and Ross soon make another baby because they're constantly boning, but no one is happy about the new baby because Ross spends an entire season being the worst husband ever and committing adultery at a glacial pace with Elizabeth. Where's Elizabeth's husband/Ross' cousin, you ask? He was murdered by a random puddle (no, seriously).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, and there’s a former classmate of Ross’ who is hell-bent on ruining his life and has one of those faces that’s just begging for a knuckle sandwich. Said classmate, whom I unaffectionately call Malfoy, almost gets Ross hanged and sabotages him at every turn because this was before Netflix, so everyone was supremely bored. Ross returns the favor by beating him up a couple of times and almost setting Malfoy's head ablaze in a fireplace. Malfoy gets even by marrying Elizabeth and knocking her up. At least that's what he thinks for now, until some 18th-century version of Maury pops out to proclaim: \u003cem>You're not the father! Ross is!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, got all that? Great. Let’s do this…\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We're thrown right into the action. A pregnant Elizabeth can't control her bolting horse and is about to be catapulted off a cliff! So the writers of the show \u003cem>did\u003c/em> get all those letters I sent! But right before I get my wish, Ross saves the day (again).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mary-kate-olsen-eye-roll-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96472\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mary-kate-olsen-eye-roll-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"358\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elizabeth is really thankful and wishes him a good day.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Psych! That would be the way a normal, gracious, non-bratty person would behave. Elizabeth, being none of these things, instead yells at Ross for abandoning her.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Girl, what? Did you forget about Ross giving you all his money so you could continue enjoying high-end caviar snacks, while his own wife and child starved? And speaking of children, did you forget Ross' first child DIED because of your grubby germs? And did you also forget the only reason you and your son are still alive is because Demelza nursed you two back to health and almost died in the process? And how she saved you from that pitchfork mob, despite you sleeping with her husband?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elizabeth's answer to all of these prompts:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/justin-bieber-brat-i-dont-recall-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96473\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/justin-bieber-brat-i-dont-recall-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"260\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before I can even finish thinking \u003cem>Elizabeth is the absolute worst\u003c/em>, someone more despicable trots up. Malfoy is just as ungrateful and threatens Ross. Um, the last time you did that, Ross almost cooked your entire head in a fireplace like a Christmas ham. No one on this show ever learns! But if this particular case of amnesia leads to Malfoy getting pummeled one more time, I'll allow it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at chez Elizabeth, Malfoy admonishes her for being so reckless in her last month of pregnancy. On top of the horse drama, he also caught her walking for three miles and lifting heavy books (*gasp*). Agatha (oh, how I've missed her boozy octogenarian ways!) sends over a you-are-so-messy look. Elizabeth wants to accidentally-but-kinda-on-purpose kill Ross' baby!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yikes-good-luck-with-that-seinfeld-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96475\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yikes-good-luck-with-that-seinfeld-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"355\" height=\"266\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Having heard about Ross saving the day through the grape vine, Elizabeth's son, Geoffrey Charles, makes the moment even more awkward by suggesting they throw a party in Ross' honor. Malfoy shuts that nice idea down with a quickness: \u003cem>Absolutely not! I'm still not finished fighting with Ross over whose penis is bigger! Oh, and we're changing your name from Poldark to my last name 'cause I'm that insecure.\u003c/em> Geoffrey Charles immediately agrees. \"Since you wish it, I will change my name... to Geoffrey Charles \u003cem>Francis\u003c/em> Poldark!\" Agatha, our drunk stand-in, cracks up just as hard as I do.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jinkx-monsoon-drag-race-laughing-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96476\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jinkx-monsoon-drag-race-laughing-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, a hot dude walks up to Demelza's house (and not a moment too soon -- Ross doesn't do it for me anymore after all his monstrous behavior last season). Demelza looks in his direction. \u003cem>Is that babe here to rescue me from a life of being second-best? Mmm, break me off a piece of that! ... Oops, that's my brother!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jennifer-lawrence-oops-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96477\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jennifer-lawrence-oops-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"383\" height=\"490\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They have a brief, joyous reunion, but because this is Demelza's life in which she can never be happy for more than 2.7 seconds before everything goes to crap, her brother, Drake, tells her she has to come back home. Their abusive dad is on his death bed. Demelza says, \"All he ever gave me was bruises.\" Translation: No thanks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In town, a random girl smells flowers in slow motion, so I guess that means this is a new character we have to start caring about. Her name is Morwenna, a random jumble of letters that this modern-day mom will probably steal for her next baby:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96478\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-1020x717.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-1020x717.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-160x113.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-800x563.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-768x540.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-1180x830.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-960x675.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-240x169.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-375x264.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-520x366.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015.jpg 1600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Morwenna, who turns out to be a cousin of Elizabeth's, is hired by Malfoy to be Geoffrey Charles' governess and make him less of a momma's boy. But we can all surely tell her real purpose is to have an intense Romeo & Juliet romance with Drake, right? Lucky girl (minus the whole double suicide thing).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Blondie is keeping her dying uncle company. That's very sad and all, but HORACE THE PUG IS IN THE HOUSE! FINALLY. Truth be told, he is the driving force behind my continuing these recaps. I mean, just look at him:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96483\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-1020x574.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-800x451.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-768x433.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-1920x1081.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-1180x665.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-960x541.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-240x135.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-375x211.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-520x293.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96482\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-1020x574.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-1920x1080.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-1180x664.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-960x540.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-240x135.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-375x211.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-520x293.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96481\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-1020x553.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"347\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-1020x553.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-160x87.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-800x434.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-768x416.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-1920x1040.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-1180x639.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-960x520.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-240x130.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-375x203.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-520x282.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Ross' mine, he has a surprise visitor. It's Geoffrey Charles. He wants to hang out with his dead dad's side of the family. Ross is like, \u003cem>Cool! Let's go down into the mine where your dad drowned to death!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/winona-weird-faces-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96479\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/winona-weird-faces-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"384\" height=\"375\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After Drake heads back to his dying father, Demelza wishes aloud that she could be more like Ross (a sociopath) and not have feelings, but she can't help it. She rides off to be by her father's side, despite his being the antichrist. Turns out Demelza's former home is basically a modeling agency for boys. Another hot brother we never knew about called Sam greets her, but becomes less hot when all he wants to talk about is the bible.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Their father's dying wish is for all of them to become Christian missionaries.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sam's response:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/12/tumblr_ml252mhGRm1qedlsro1_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-10201\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/12/tumblr_ml252mhGRm1qedlsro1_250.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"193\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza's response:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/26704-god-is-not-real.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-38901\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/26704-god-is-not-real.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"193\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Drake's response:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/unsure-wiig-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96480\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/unsure-wiig-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"406\" height=\"229\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Right before their dad is about to pass away, Demelza is like, \u003cem>I'd stay, but a. I don't want to, and b. I got more important stuff to do. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That more important stuff turns out to be a super secret wedding between Blondie and Doc, who's on a 24-hour leave from the war. Blondie and Doc embrace and are ready to rip each other's clothes off. They share a look that says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/were-gonna-bang-emma-stone-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96484\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/were-gonna-bang-emma-stone-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"242\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross interrupts with a nudge that says, \u003cem>Um, hey guys, the priest is literally standing right over there. Get married first.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Elizabeth senses that Ross is thinking about something other than her, so she throws a vase and then herself down a flight of stairs. Unborn Ross Jr. is like:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/can-i-live-obama-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96485\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/can-i-live-obama-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at chez Ross, Doc walks into the guest room he's sharing with his new wife and asks if she's nervous. Blondie responds: \"I would be were tonight our first time.\" You go, girlfriend!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/meryl-j-lo-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96487\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/meryl-j-lo-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before they can get it on, news of Elizabeth's tumble arrives (damn it, Liz, must you ruin every single little thing?!). Doc runs off to try saving the baby Elizabeth really hopes dies.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/awkward-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96488\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/awkward-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's, Malfoy's uncle says he should have married a \"younger, more robust specimen,\" and advises that \"if it comes to a choice, obviously the child takes priority.\" Agatha and Geoffrey Charles try to remember his exact proportions so they can get the voodoo doll just right.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Upstairs, after a very loud labor, Doc delivers the baby. Elizabeth asks, \"Is it alive?\" Before Doc can answer that, yes, the baby she tried to kill with long walks and heavy books did survive, Elizabeth passes out or dies. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Blondie's uncle apologizes for cock-blocking her and Doc all last season. Blondie is like, \u003cem>No sweat! I lost my virginity to him ages ago! Oh, and check out my wedding ring!\u003c/em> Her uncle dies on the spot.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Malfoy Manor, Elizabeth is alive.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/britney-happy-fake-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96494\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/britney-happy-fake-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"250\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Doc puts the baby in her arms, and Elizabeth looks at it like, \u003cem>Sorry about the staircase, I guess. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, Ross hides in a bush, Sean Spicer-style, and watches as Agatha shouts about how the baby should be called Ross and how it's hella cursed. Malfoy has two of his Slytherin cronies pick her chair up and carry her off to her room. The one time I want Ross to bust down the door and intervene, he doesn't. He's really going to let them manhandle a national treasure like that?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96515\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1008\" height=\"671\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone.jpg 1008w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-768x511.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-960x639.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-240x160.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-375x250.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-520x346.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1008px) 100vw, 1008px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Ross arrives home after being out all night. Demelza doesn't even bother fighting with him about it 'cause what's the point? Instead they have this sad exchange:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"There's something I must tell you, Ross, and I fear you might not like it. I'm with child again. You're not displeased?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"I might wish the timing were better.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Yes, Ross, the timing isn't great, considering you just had a secret baby with your married ex. Tell your sperm to find some chill.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because this is all getting rather heavy and depressing, the show's writers throw us a bone in the form of a shirtless Drake bathing in a stream.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/landscape-1496332367-poldark-trailer.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96495\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/landscape-1496332367-poldark-trailer.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Off the border of France, Doc writes Blondie a letter that goes something like this: \u003cem>Hey, so I'm 98% sure the French are about to blow me to bits, but I don't want you to worry, despite the very worrisome thought I just put in your head. Hope you're having a good day!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at the mine, Ross reunites with an old pirate he knew as a kid because that's totally normal. Old Pirate Dude has a hook for a hand and carries his dearly departed hand's bones in a little pouch that he plays like a maraca. The sound reminds him that life is short, so you should live it up while you can. YOLO and what not.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yolo-donald-duck-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96499\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yolo-donald-duck-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"380\" height=\"282\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Time sure does fly when you're lying about your baby's father; it's already time for Ross Jr. a.k.a. Valentine's baptism! Verity comes back into town for the event and immediately brings attention to how \"robust\" Valentine is for allegedly being premature. Blondie helps her open that can of worms further: \"He's darker than his father!\" Agatha's burpy response says it all:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/914746367263698945\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>News breaks of a 12-hour stormy battle off the shore of France. Both Verity and Blondie's husbands are missing. Doc really jinxed things with that letter.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Since their father's death, Demelza's cute brothers have moved in with Ross and co. and gotten started on all that converting-the-heathens business. They're also on the hunt for a cool church to attend. What about the one owned by Ross' worst enemy in the entire world? A totally reasonable choice that couldn't possibly cause any conflict.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sam and Drake show up for mass and get testy when the priest won't start without Malfoy. What would Jesus do (if he was punk rock)? Loudly sign hymns as a form of protest until he got banned from the church, that's what!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/powerpuff-girls-sing-loud-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96503\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/powerpuff-girls-sing-loud-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at chez Malfoy, Valentine is also getting really loud. Verity comes in to check on him and finds Elizabeth just sitting there, ignoring his cries. Verity points out that Elizabeth always comforted Geoffrey Charles when he was a baby. Elizabeth snaps back: \"All children are different. If you ever have another, you'll realize that.\" Cool thing to say to someone whose husband might be at the bottom of the English Channel.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>All over Cornwall, Drake and Morwenna run into each other every ten minutes and have cute little moments, but I'm not going to go into detail about any of them 'cause Drake's shirt was on for all of it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/sue-me-drag-race-nina-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96505\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/sue-me-drag-race-nina-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"279\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some rich dude we've never heard of throws a huge party and specifically invites both Ross and Malfoy. Now that Blondie's magistrate uncle is dead, the position needs to be filled. An old guy in a powdered wig offers the gig to Ross, who is as confused as I am. Ross asks, \u003cem>You remember when I almost was sentenced to death for inciting a riot just last season, right? Or all the other times I almost got hanged for various tomfoolery? \u003c/em>Turns out none of that matters when you're white and come from a rich family.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/pretends-to-be-shocked-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96506\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/pretends-to-be-shocked-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"347\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despite the opportunity to help the downtrodden from the bench, Ross declines because it would interfere with his busy schedule of stalking Elizabeth and ignoring Demelza. The job goes to Malfoy, who is really jazzed about filling the gallows with the poor to keep them from upsetting the status quo with their pesky pleas for civil rights. Again:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/pretends-to-be-shocked-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96506\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/pretends-to-be-shocked-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"347\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, Ross and Demelza chat in bed about how they're happy things are about to be peaceful around here, when a frantic knock comes at the door. It's Old Maraca-Playing Pirate Dude! He says Doc is probably being held at some prison in France and Ross needs to go free him. Invading a foreign country in the throes of revolution, freeing a single prisoner, and making it back home alive. Sounds totally doable!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over in France, a bunch of Brits are lined up and shot. A rifle is pointed at Doc's face. Please don't shoot! Horace the Pug needs a father figure!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, or read all my \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> recaps\u003c/a> below!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/27/poldark-season-2-finale-recap-burn-baby-burn/\">‘Poldark’ Season 2 Finale Recap: Burn Baby Burn\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/20/poldark-season-2-episode-8-recap-man-i-feel-like-a-woman/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 8 Recap: Man! I Feel Like A Woman!\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7 Recap: I'm In Love With A Monster\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/19/poldark-season-1-premiere-recap-stayin-alive/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1 Premiere Recap: Stayin’ Alive\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "This episode has it all: people are born, people die, and, most importantly, people take off their shirts.",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>For those who have no idea what this show is about, I advise you to read \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">my previous recaps\u003c/a>. If you’re too busy or impatient for all of that, here’s the much-abbreviated gist:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross Poldark fought in the American Revolutionary War on the British side. As we know, things didn’t really work out. Presumed dead, his ex, Elizabeth, got with his lame cousin because there were apparently no other men around who flaked on the war. Ross returns alive and everyone is supremely inconvenienced by his not-deadness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross proceeds to spend a lot of time hanging out with poor people. He even marries one! His scullery maid, Demelza! And has a baby with her! But don’t get too excited; the baby dies of strep throat or something like that. Demelza and Ross soon make another baby because they're constantly boning, but no one is happy about the new baby because Ross spends an entire season being the worst husband ever and committing adultery at a glacial pace with Elizabeth. Where's Elizabeth's husband/Ross' cousin, you ask? He was murdered by a random puddle (no, seriously).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, and there’s a former classmate of Ross’ who is hell-bent on ruining his life and has one of those faces that’s just begging for a knuckle sandwich. Said classmate, whom I unaffectionately call Malfoy, almost gets Ross hanged and sabotages him at every turn because this was before Netflix, so everyone was supremely bored. Ross returns the favor by beating him up a couple of times and almost setting Malfoy's head ablaze in a fireplace. Malfoy gets even by marrying Elizabeth and knocking her up. At least that's what he thinks for now, until some 18th-century version of Maury pops out to proclaim: \u003cem>You're not the father! Ross is!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, got all that? Great. Let’s do this…\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We're thrown right into the action. A pregnant Elizabeth can't control her bolting horse and is about to be catapulted off a cliff! So the writers of the show \u003cem>did\u003c/em> get all those letters I sent! But right before I get my wish, Ross saves the day (again).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mary-kate-olsen-eye-roll-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96472\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mary-kate-olsen-eye-roll-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"358\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elizabeth is really thankful and wishes him a good day.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Psych! That would be the way a normal, gracious, non-bratty person would behave. Elizabeth, being none of these things, instead yells at Ross for abandoning her.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Girl, what? Did you forget about Ross giving you all his money so you could continue enjoying high-end caviar snacks, while his own wife and child starved? And speaking of children, did you forget Ross' first child DIED because of your grubby germs? And did you also forget the only reason you and your son are still alive is because Demelza nursed you two back to health and almost died in the process? And how she saved you from that pitchfork mob, despite you sleeping with her husband?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elizabeth's answer to all of these prompts:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/justin-bieber-brat-i-dont-recall-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96473\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/justin-bieber-brat-i-dont-recall-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"260\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before I can even finish thinking \u003cem>Elizabeth is the absolute worst\u003c/em>, someone more despicable trots up. Malfoy is just as ungrateful and threatens Ross. Um, the last time you did that, Ross almost cooked your entire head in a fireplace like a Christmas ham. No one on this show ever learns! But if this particular case of amnesia leads to Malfoy getting pummeled one more time, I'll allow it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at chez Elizabeth, Malfoy admonishes her for being so reckless in her last month of pregnancy. On top of the horse drama, he also caught her walking for three miles and lifting heavy books (*gasp*). Agatha (oh, how I've missed her boozy octogenarian ways!) sends over a you-are-so-messy look. Elizabeth wants to accidentally-but-kinda-on-purpose kill Ross' baby!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yikes-good-luck-with-that-seinfeld-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96475\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yikes-good-luck-with-that-seinfeld-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"355\" height=\"266\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Having heard about Ross saving the day through the grape vine, Elizabeth's son, Geoffrey Charles, makes the moment even more awkward by suggesting they throw a party in Ross' honor. Malfoy shuts that nice idea down with a quickness: \u003cem>Absolutely not! I'm still not finished fighting with Ross over whose penis is bigger! Oh, and we're changing your name from Poldark to my last name 'cause I'm that insecure.\u003c/em> Geoffrey Charles immediately agrees. \"Since you wish it, I will change my name... to Geoffrey Charles \u003cem>Francis\u003c/em> Poldark!\" Agatha, our drunk stand-in, cracks up just as hard as I do.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jinkx-monsoon-drag-race-laughing-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96476\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jinkx-monsoon-drag-race-laughing-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, a hot dude walks up to Demelza's house (and not a moment too soon -- Ross doesn't do it for me anymore after all his monstrous behavior last season). Demelza looks in his direction. \u003cem>Is that babe here to rescue me from a life of being second-best? Mmm, break me off a piece of that! ... Oops, that's my brother!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jennifer-lawrence-oops-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96477\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/jennifer-lawrence-oops-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"383\" height=\"490\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They have a brief, joyous reunion, but because this is Demelza's life in which she can never be happy for more than 2.7 seconds before everything goes to crap, her brother, Drake, tells her she has to come back home. Their abusive dad is on his death bed. Demelza says, \"All he ever gave me was bruises.\" Translation: No thanks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In town, a random girl smells flowers in slow motion, so I guess that means this is a new character we have to start caring about. Her name is Morwenna, a random jumble of letters that this modern-day mom will probably steal for her next baby:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96478\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-1020x717.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-1020x717.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-160x113.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-800x563.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-768x540.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-1180x830.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-960x675.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-240x169.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-375x264.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015-520x366.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/015.jpg 1600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Morwenna, who turns out to be a cousin of Elizabeth's, is hired by Malfoy to be Geoffrey Charles' governess and make him less of a momma's boy. But we can all surely tell her real purpose is to have an intense Romeo & Juliet romance with Drake, right? Lucky girl (minus the whole double suicide thing).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Blondie is keeping her dying uncle company. That's very sad and all, but HORACE THE PUG IS IN THE HOUSE! FINALLY. Truth be told, he is the driving force behind my continuing these recaps. I mean, just look at him:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96483\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-1020x574.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-800x451.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-768x433.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-1920x1081.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-1180x665.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-960x541.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-240x135.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-375x211.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace-520x293.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96482\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-1020x574.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-1920x1080.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-1180x664.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-960x540.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-240x135.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-375x211.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace2-520x293.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96481\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-1020x553.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"347\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-1020x553.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-160x87.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-800x434.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-768x416.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-1920x1040.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-1180x639.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-960x520.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-240x130.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-375x203.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/horace3-520x282.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Ross' mine, he has a surprise visitor. It's Geoffrey Charles. He wants to hang out with his dead dad's side of the family. Ross is like, \u003cem>Cool! Let's go down into the mine where your dad drowned to death!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/winona-weird-faces-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96479\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/winona-weird-faces-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"384\" height=\"375\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After Drake heads back to his dying father, Demelza wishes aloud that she could be more like Ross (a sociopath) and not have feelings, but she can't help it. She rides off to be by her father's side, despite his being the antichrist. Turns out Demelza's former home is basically a modeling agency for boys. Another hot brother we never knew about called Sam greets her, but becomes less hot when all he wants to talk about is the bible.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Their father's dying wish is for all of them to become Christian missionaries.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sam's response:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/12/tumblr_ml252mhGRm1qedlsro1_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-10201\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/12/tumblr_ml252mhGRm1qedlsro1_250.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"193\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza's response:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/26704-god-is-not-real.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-38901\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/26704-god-is-not-real.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"193\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Drake's response:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/unsure-wiig-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96480\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/unsure-wiig-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"406\" height=\"229\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Right before their dad is about to pass away, Demelza is like, \u003cem>I'd stay, but a. I don't want to, and b. I got more important stuff to do. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That more important stuff turns out to be a super secret wedding between Blondie and Doc, who's on a 24-hour leave from the war. Blondie and Doc embrace and are ready to rip each other's clothes off. They share a look that says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/were-gonna-bang-emma-stone-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96484\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/were-gonna-bang-emma-stone-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"242\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross interrupts with a nudge that says, \u003cem>Um, hey guys, the priest is literally standing right over there. Get married first.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Elizabeth senses that Ross is thinking about something other than her, so she throws a vase and then herself down a flight of stairs. Unborn Ross Jr. is like:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/can-i-live-obama-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96485\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/can-i-live-obama-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at chez Ross, Doc walks into the guest room he's sharing with his new wife and asks if she's nervous. Blondie responds: \"I would be were tonight our first time.\" You go, girlfriend!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/meryl-j-lo-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-96487\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/meryl-j-lo-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before they can get it on, news of Elizabeth's tumble arrives (damn it, Liz, must you ruin every single little thing?!). Doc runs off to try saving the baby Elizabeth really hopes dies.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/awkward-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96488\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/awkward-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's, Malfoy's uncle says he should have married a \"younger, more robust specimen,\" and advises that \"if it comes to a choice, obviously the child takes priority.\" Agatha and Geoffrey Charles try to remember his exact proportions so they can get the voodoo doll just right.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Upstairs, after a very loud labor, Doc delivers the baby. Elizabeth asks, \"Is it alive?\" Before Doc can answer that, yes, the baby she tried to kill with long walks and heavy books did survive, Elizabeth passes out or dies. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Blondie's uncle apologizes for cock-blocking her and Doc all last season. Blondie is like, \u003cem>No sweat! I lost my virginity to him ages ago! Oh, and check out my wedding ring!\u003c/em> Her uncle dies on the spot.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Malfoy Manor, Elizabeth is alive.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/britney-happy-fake-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96494\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/britney-happy-fake-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"250\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Doc puts the baby in her arms, and Elizabeth looks at it like, \u003cem>Sorry about the staircase, I guess. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, Ross hides in a bush, Sean Spicer-style, and watches as Agatha shouts about how the baby should be called Ross and how it's hella cursed. Malfoy has two of his Slytherin cronies pick her chair up and carry her off to her room. The one time I want Ross to bust down the door and intervene, he doesn't. He's really going to let them manhandle a national treasure like that?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96515\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1008\" height=\"671\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone.jpg 1008w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-768x511.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-960x639.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-240x160.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-375x250.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/leave-agatha-alone-520x346.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1008px) 100vw, 1008px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Ross arrives home after being out all night. Demelza doesn't even bother fighting with him about it 'cause what's the point? Instead they have this sad exchange:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"There's something I must tell you, Ross, and I fear you might not like it. I'm with child again. You're not displeased?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"I might wish the timing were better.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Yes, Ross, the timing isn't great, considering you just had a secret baby with your married ex. Tell your sperm to find some chill.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because this is all getting rather heavy and depressing, the show's writers throw us a bone in the form of a shirtless Drake bathing in a stream.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/landscape-1496332367-poldark-trailer.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96495\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/landscape-1496332367-poldark-trailer.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Off the border of France, Doc writes Blondie a letter that goes something like this: \u003cem>Hey, so I'm 98% sure the French are about to blow me to bits, but I don't want you to worry, despite the very worrisome thought I just put in your head. Hope you're having a good day!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at the mine, Ross reunites with an old pirate he knew as a kid because that's totally normal. Old Pirate Dude has a hook for a hand and carries his dearly departed hand's bones in a little pouch that he plays like a maraca. The sound reminds him that life is short, so you should live it up while you can. YOLO and what not.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yolo-donald-duck-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96499\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yolo-donald-duck-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"380\" height=\"282\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Time sure does fly when you're lying about your baby's father; it's already time for Ross Jr. a.k.a. Valentine's baptism! Verity comes back into town for the event and immediately brings attention to how \"robust\" Valentine is for allegedly being premature. Blondie helps her open that can of worms further: \"He's darker than his father!\" Agatha's burpy response says it all:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>News breaks of a 12-hour stormy battle off the shore of France. Both Verity and Blondie's husbands are missing. Doc really jinxed things with that letter.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Since their father's death, Demelza's cute brothers have moved in with Ross and co. and gotten started on all that converting-the-heathens business. They're also on the hunt for a cool church to attend. What about the one owned by Ross' worst enemy in the entire world? A totally reasonable choice that couldn't possibly cause any conflict.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sam and Drake show up for mass and get testy when the priest won't start without Malfoy. What would Jesus do (if he was punk rock)? Loudly sign hymns as a form of protest until he got banned from the church, that's what!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/powerpuff-girls-sing-loud-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96503\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/powerpuff-girls-sing-loud-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at chez Malfoy, Valentine is also getting really loud. Verity comes in to check on him and finds Elizabeth just sitting there, ignoring his cries. Verity points out that Elizabeth always comforted Geoffrey Charles when he was a baby. Elizabeth snaps back: \"All children are different. If you ever have another, you'll realize that.\" Cool thing to say to someone whose husband might be at the bottom of the English Channel.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>All over Cornwall, Drake and Morwenna run into each other every ten minutes and have cute little moments, but I'm not going to go into detail about any of them 'cause Drake's shirt was on for all of it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/sue-me-drag-race-nina-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96505\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/sue-me-drag-race-nina-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"279\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some rich dude we've never heard of throws a huge party and specifically invites both Ross and Malfoy. Now that Blondie's magistrate uncle is dead, the position needs to be filled. An old guy in a powdered wig offers the gig to Ross, who is as confused as I am. Ross asks, \u003cem>You remember when I almost was sentenced to death for inciting a riot just last season, right? Or all the other times I almost got hanged for various tomfoolery? \u003c/em>Turns out none of that matters when you're white and come from a rich family.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/pretends-to-be-shocked-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96506\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/pretends-to-be-shocked-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"347\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despite the opportunity to help the downtrodden from the bench, Ross declines because it would interfere with his busy schedule of stalking Elizabeth and ignoring Demelza. The job goes to Malfoy, who is really jazzed about filling the gallows with the poor to keep them from upsetting the status quo with their pesky pleas for civil rights. Again:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/pretends-to-be-shocked-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96506\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/pretends-to-be-shocked-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"347\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, Ross and Demelza chat in bed about how they're happy things are about to be peaceful around here, when a frantic knock comes at the door. It's Old Maraca-Playing Pirate Dude! He says Doc is probably being held at some prison in France and Ross needs to go free him. Invading a foreign country in the throes of revolution, freeing a single prisoner, and making it back home alive. Sounds totally doable!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over in France, a bunch of Brits are lined up and shot. A rifle is pointed at Doc's face. Please don't shoot! Horace the Pug needs a father figure!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, or read all my \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> recaps\u003c/a> below!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/27/poldark-season-2-finale-recap-burn-baby-burn/\">‘Poldark’ Season 2 Finale Recap: Burn Baby Burn\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/20/poldark-season-2-episode-8-recap-man-i-feel-like-a-woman/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 8 Recap: Man! I Feel Like A Woman!\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7 Recap: I'm In Love With A Monster\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/19/poldark-season-1-premiere-recap-stayin-alive/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1 Premiere Recap: Stayin’ Alive\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Poldark' Season 3 Trailer Promises More Fireworks, Baby Mama Drama, and Shirtless Dudes",
"title": "'Poldark' Season 3 Trailer Promises More Fireworks, Baby Mama Drama, and Shirtless Dudes",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>The five long months since the finale of \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>'s second season have felt like wandering an unforgiving desert, thirsty for water... and more shirtless shots of Aidan Turner scything and mining and, um, other stuff. Well, my fellow parched \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> fanatics, here's a droplet for you: the trailer for the third season!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/masterpiece/clips/poldark-s3-trailer/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-84138 size-full\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-1.41.27-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"693\" height=\"390\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-1.41.27-PM.png 693w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-1.41.27-PM-160x90.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-1.41.27-PM-240x135.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-1.41.27-PM-375x211.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-1.41.27-PM-520x293.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 693px) 100vw, 693px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I've now watched this 40-second tease more than 12 times. Here's what I've learned about what we can expect when \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> returns on October 1, 2017:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross' awkward haircut has grown out...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84133 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-800x440.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"440\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-800x440.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-768x423.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-1020x561.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-1180x649.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-960x528.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-520x286.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM.png 1394w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...which means that Demelza won't be able to stay mad at him for any of his betrayals, but what else is new?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84134 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-800x437.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"437\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-800x437.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-160x87.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-768x420.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-1020x558.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-1180x645.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-960x525.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-240x131.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-375x205.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-520x284.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM.png 1401w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elizabeth is really going through with this whole giving-birth-to-the-spawn-of-satan thing (or is Ross the actual father??). Paging Jerry Springer. Also, according to pregnancy lore, carrying low means it's a boy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84132 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-800x445.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"445\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-800x445.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-768x427.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-1020x567.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-1180x656.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-960x533.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-1038x576.png 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-240x133.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-375x208.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-520x289.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM.png 1391w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Confirmed: It's a boy! And his name is going to be Valentine. You can't see the baby's face, but I bet he's side-eyeing George so hard.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84131 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-800x454.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"454\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-800x454.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-160x91.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-768x436.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-1020x579.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-1180x670.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-960x545.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-240x136.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-375x213.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-520x295.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM.png 1355w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Agatha is still kicking, and will continue her habit of talking smack about people while pointing a finger right in their faces. Bless her.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84129 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-800x442.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"442\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-800x442.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-768x424.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-1020x563.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-1180x651.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-960x530.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-672x372.png 672w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-375x207.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-520x287.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM.png 1393w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>New hottie alert! Demelza apparently has a brother that isn't an abusive slob! His name is Drake!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84124 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-768x422.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-1020x560.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-1180x648.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM.png 1401w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He has all of his teeth!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84119 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-768x421.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-1020x559.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-1180x647.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM.png 1402w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He bathes in babbling brooks!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84121 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-800x440.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"440\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-800x440.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-768x422.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-1020x561.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-1180x649.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-960x528.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-520x286.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM.png 1401w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> producers clearly know what their audience wants.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84123 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-768x422.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-1020x560.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-1180x648.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-520x286.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM.png 1398w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I think this warrants an animated gif replay, don't you?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84136 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/landscape-1496332367-poldark-trailer.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some random teen likes what she sees.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84120 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-768x421.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-1020x560.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-1180x647.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM.png 1398w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It isn't long before they get to whatever base symbolizes Eskimo kissing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84115 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-800x437.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"437\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-800x437.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-160x87.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-768x420.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-1020x558.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-1180x645.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-960x525.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-240x131.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-375x205.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-520x284.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM.png 1401w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In addition to good looks, good teeth, and good bathing techniques, Drake is also good with children! This is beginning to be too much. Ross who?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84118 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-768x421.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-1020x559.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-1180x647.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM.png 1402w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Once you think one new young babe is too much to handle, another one pops up, looking like a 19th century \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/05/19/wondering-where-harry-styles-got-his-new-direction-ask-robbie-williams/\">Harry Styles\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84112 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-800x440.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"440\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-800x440.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-768x423.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-1020x561.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-1180x649.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-960x528.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-520x286.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM.png 1394w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But back to the old guard. Dwight Enys seems to be in danger! Hasn't he been through enough? The break-up with Caroline, for sure, but also never getting to hang out with Horace the Pug again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84114 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-800x444.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"444\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-800x444.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-768x426.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-1020x566.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-1180x654.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-960x532.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-672x372.png 672w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-1038x576.png 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-240x133.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-375x208.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-520x288.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM.png 1392w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of Horace's mom, here she is. Can we pan the camera down to her feet to get a glimpse of the real star please?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84113 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-768x422.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-1020x560.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-1180x648.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM.png 1399w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Woah! Demelza will find a reason to smile? We didn't get any of that last year, thanks to Ross being the worst husband ever, so this is a welcome sight.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84110 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-800x438.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"438\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-800x438.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-768x421.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-1020x559.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-1180x647.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-960x526.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM.png 1403w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross will continue to engage in more awkward war stuff...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84109 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-768x421.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-1020x559.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-1180x647.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-960x526.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM.png 1401w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...and punch dudes in awkward hats. Cool, I guess.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-84107 size-medium\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-800x440.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"440\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-800x440.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-768x423.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-1020x561.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-1180x649.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-960x528.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-520x286.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM.png 1394w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And George is still working on his audition tape for \u003cem>RuPaul's Drag Race\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84108 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-768x421.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-1020x560.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-1180x647.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM.png 1396w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In case you're unfamiliar with \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">my previous Poldark-related work\u003c/a>, his drag person calls herself Hisstina Snakespeare and looks like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/hisstina-snakespeare.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-39601 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/hisstina-snakespeare-800x533.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/hisstina-snakespeare-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/hisstina-snakespeare-400x266.jpg 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/hisstina-snakespeare-768x511.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/hisstina-snakespeare.jpg 960w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That's all we get for now. If this short preview wasn't enough \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> for you, don't distress; you can relive all the show's past glory through \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">my cheeky recaps\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Poldark Season 3 premieres October 1, 2017 on PBS.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Get your first look at the new season of Poldark!",
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"headline": "'Poldark' Season 3 Trailer Promises More Fireworks, Baby Mama Drama, and Shirtless Dudes",
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"slug": "poldark-season-3-trailer-promises-more-fireworks-baby-mama-drama-and-shirtless-dudes",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>The five long months since the finale of \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>'s second season have felt like wandering an unforgiving desert, thirsty for water... and more shirtless shots of Aidan Turner scything and mining and, um, other stuff. Well, my fellow parched \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> fanatics, here's a droplet for you: the trailer for the third season!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/masterpiece/clips/poldark-s3-trailer/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-84138 size-full\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-1.41.27-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"693\" height=\"390\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-1.41.27-PM.png 693w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-1.41.27-PM-160x90.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-1.41.27-PM-240x135.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-1.41.27-PM-375x211.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-1.41.27-PM-520x293.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 693px) 100vw, 693px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I've now watched this 40-second tease more than 12 times. Here's what I've learned about what we can expect when \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> returns on October 1, 2017:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross' awkward haircut has grown out...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84133 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-800x440.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"440\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-800x440.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-768x423.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-1020x561.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-1180x649.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-960x528.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM-520x286.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.46-PM.png 1394w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...which means that Demelza won't be able to stay mad at him for any of his betrayals, but what else is new?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84134 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-800x437.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"437\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-800x437.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-160x87.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-768x420.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-1020x558.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-1180x645.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-960x525.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-240x131.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-375x205.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM-520x284.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.06.26-PM.png 1401w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elizabeth is really going through with this whole giving-birth-to-the-spawn-of-satan thing (or is Ross the actual father??). Paging Jerry Springer. Also, according to pregnancy lore, carrying low means it's a boy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84132 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-800x445.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"445\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-800x445.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-768x427.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-1020x567.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-1180x656.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-960x533.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-1038x576.png 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-240x133.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-375x208.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM-520x289.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.32-PM.png 1391w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Confirmed: It's a boy! And his name is going to be Valentine. You can't see the baby's face, but I bet he's side-eyeing George so hard.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84131 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-800x454.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"454\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-800x454.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-160x91.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-768x436.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-1020x579.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-1180x670.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-960x545.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-240x136.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-375x213.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM-520x295.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.07.55-PM.png 1355w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Agatha is still kicking, and will continue her habit of talking smack about people while pointing a finger right in their faces. Bless her.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84129 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-800x442.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"442\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-800x442.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-768x424.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-1020x563.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-1180x651.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-960x530.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-672x372.png 672w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-375x207.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM-520x287.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.09.32-PM.png 1393w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>New hottie alert! Demelza apparently has a brother that isn't an abusive slob! His name is Drake!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84124 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-768x422.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-1020x560.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-1180x648.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.10.30-PM.png 1401w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He has all of his teeth!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84119 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-768x421.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-1020x559.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-1180x647.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.21-PM.png 1402w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He bathes in babbling brooks!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84121 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-800x440.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"440\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-800x440.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-768x422.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-1020x561.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-1180x649.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-960x528.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM-520x286.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.24-PM.png 1401w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> producers clearly know what their audience wants.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84123 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-768x422.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-1020x560.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-1180x648.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM-520x286.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.03-PM.png 1398w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I think this warrants an animated gif replay, don't you?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84136 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/landscape-1496332367-poldark-trailer.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some random teen likes what she sees.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84120 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-768x421.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-1020x560.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-1180x647.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.11.43-PM.png 1398w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It isn't long before they get to whatever base symbolizes Eskimo kissing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84115 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-800x437.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"437\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-800x437.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-160x87.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-768x420.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-1020x558.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-1180x645.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-960x525.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-240x131.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-375x205.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM-520x284.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.04-PM.png 1401w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In addition to good looks, good teeth, and good bathing techniques, Drake is also good with children! This is beginning to be too much. Ross who?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84118 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-768x421.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-1020x559.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-1180x647.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.12.53-PM.png 1402w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Once you think one new young babe is too much to handle, another one pops up, looking like a 19th century \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/05/19/wondering-where-harry-styles-got-his-new-direction-ask-robbie-williams/\">Harry Styles\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84112 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-800x440.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"440\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-800x440.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-768x423.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-1020x561.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-1180x649.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-960x528.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM-520x286.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.01-PM.png 1394w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But back to the old guard. Dwight Enys seems to be in danger! Hasn't he been through enough? The break-up with Caroline, for sure, but also never getting to hang out with Horace the Pug again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84114 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-800x444.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"444\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-800x444.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-768x426.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-1020x566.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-1180x654.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-960x532.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-672x372.png 672w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-1038x576.png 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-240x133.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-375x208.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM-520x288.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.31-PM.png 1392w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of Horace's mom, here she is. Can we pan the camera down to her feet to get a glimpse of the real star please?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84113 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-768x422.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-1020x560.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-1180x648.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.14.42-PM.png 1399w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Woah! Demelza will find a reason to smile? We didn't get any of that last year, thanks to Ross being the worst husband ever, so this is a welcome sight.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84110 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-800x438.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"438\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-800x438.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-768x421.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-1020x559.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-1180x647.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-960x526.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.15.46-PM.png 1403w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross will continue to engage in more awkward war stuff...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84109 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-768x421.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-1020x559.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-1180x647.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-960x526.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.07-PM.png 1401w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...and punch dudes in awkward hats. Cool, I guess.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-84107 size-medium\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-800x440.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"440\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-800x440.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-768x423.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-1020x561.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-1180x649.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-960x528.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM-520x286.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.49-PM.png 1394w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And George is still working on his audition tape for \u003cem>RuPaul's Drag Race\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-84108 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-800x439.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"439\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-800x439.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-160x88.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-768x421.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-1020x560.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-1180x647.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-960x527.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-240x132.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-375x206.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM-520x285.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/06/Screen-Shot-2017-06-02-at-2.16.27-PM.png 1396w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In case you're unfamiliar with \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">my previous Poldark-related work\u003c/a>, his drag person calls herself Hisstina Snakespeare and looks like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/hisstina-snakespeare.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-39601 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/hisstina-snakespeare-800x533.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/hisstina-snakespeare-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/hisstina-snakespeare-400x266.jpg 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/hisstina-snakespeare-768x511.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/hisstina-snakespeare.jpg 960w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That's all we get for now. If this short preview wasn't enough \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> for you, don't distress; you can relive all the show's past glory through \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">my cheeky recaps\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Poldark Season 3 premieres October 1, 2017 on PBS.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Poldark' Season 2 Finale Recap: Burn Baby Burn",
"title": "'Poldark' Season 2 Finale Recap: Burn Baby Burn",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/20/poldark-season-2-episode-8-recap-man-i-feel-like-a-woman/\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Demelza briefly got her groove back, but then almost got raped (*sigh*). Will Demelza stumble upon a time machine with the ability to transport her to a time when women are truly equal and don't have to worry about that kind of stuff (not 2016, evidently)? Will Demelza finally get an annulment and go on a fun\u003cem> Thelma and Louise\u003c/em>-style road trip with Verity, minus the explosive ending? Will some merciful disaster occur inside the mine so it can close forever, sparing us from more boring underground storylines? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We kick things off with a scene of Demelza picking flowers. Maybe she's planning on leaving them on Ross' grave after she rightfully murders him dead? No one would blame you, Demelza. Just do it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the newly successful mine, everyone is acting like they're in a Rihanna music video, coins falling all over their twerking bodies. Ross is still sad, though, because he's a miserable person and, as the aphorism goes, mo' money, mo' problems.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/1351.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49534\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/1351.gif\" alt=\"1351\" width=\"400\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's mansion, Malfoy has officially moved in, causing Elizabeth's son to ask two really important questions: 1. Who dis? and 2. Are you two serious? Malfoy answers the second question with a strong yes, as he orders servants to take down the portrait of the boy's father, who was unceremoniously murdered by a random puddle just a few episodes ago.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a nearby forest, Malfoy has instructed his Slytherin cronies to construct a fence around Elizabeth's property. The poor people are like, \u003cem>Um, no, we hang out here\u003c/em>. One of the cronies responds by smashing a rifle butt into their faces.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Ross takes out a big sack of coins and tries to use their shininess to distract Demelza from the fact that he's a monster. Just like in the last episode, Demelza does not fall for it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_nqr5wkWggS1sjc5sqo1_r1_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-36401\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_nqr5wkWggS1sjc5sqo1_r1_500.gif\" alt=\"rihanna money throw gif\" width=\"500\" height=\"230\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Blondie's former home, Horace the Pug is nowhere to be found (*sob*). But Blondie's uncle is there, oversharing details about his \"unusually sweet\" urine with Doc. He apparently has \"the sugar sickness,\" which is the karmic price you pay when you stand in the way of Horace's mom's marriage. Sorry not sorry.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because Doc is saving his life and all, Blondie's uncle is like, \u003cem>So, hey, sorry about calling you trash a few weeks ago and promising to destroy you. Anywho, Blondie is engaged to someone who is definitely not you. K, thanks for all the help, bye! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Doc immediately enlists in the war, a move that's drama queen-y enough without what he says while doing it: \"I may not return to these shores for years. Or at all!\" And to think all of this could have been avoided if he had an outlet like LiveJournal to vent all his emo feelings.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Malfoy and Ross spend days and days sending sassy notes back and forth to each other. Finally, they agree to meet. Malfoy wants to get his hands on some of Ross' mine shares because he, too, wants to know what it feels like to be in a Rihanna music video.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For the umpteenth time, the phrase \"scullery maid\" is used as a pejorative. I'm sick of this show's uninspired trash talk, and so is Ross, who punches Malfoy in the face. Malfoy smashes Ross' head into a grandfather clock (cool!), Ross smashes Malfoy into a bookshelf (eh, not as cool, but ok!), and then Ross grabs Malfoy and tries to set his head on fire in the fireplace (THE COOLEST!). I hate you, Ross, but thanks for at least keeping things interesting.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After a few Slytherin cronies haul Ross out of the house, Malfoy runs upstairs to brag to Elizabeth about how he totally clobbered Ross. \"I hope he will have learned his lesson,\" she replies, despite the fact that she just found out Ross let his own family starve so that she could have some pocket change. Elizabeth, congratulations on being the worst on a show full of horrible people!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at chez Ross, Doc tells Demelza he's off to die in the war. Demelza is bummed because he's the only person left around these parts that she can stand. Their convo is interrupted by a bloody Ross. Demelza's entire body turns into a\u003cem> I'm-so-tired-of-your-crap\u003c/em> eye roll.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/annoyedface.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49535\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/annoyedface.gif\" alt=\"annoyedface\" width=\"500\" height=\"254\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, Ross finds her upstairs and tries to get a reaction out of her by threatening to go to war. Demelza handles it like a boss.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"Why? Cause your dearest friend is running away and so must you?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"Obviously the thought of leaving you and Jeremy...\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"Wouldn't be the first time you've considered such a thing. Go to war, Ross. Play soldiers. Or stay home and save all of Cornwall. What it is to be married to such a great man.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/b26.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49536\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/b26.gif\" alt=\"b26\" width=\"328\" height=\"284\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">Game, set, match.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The following day, Ross finds out Blondie was the secret benefactor who helped save him from debtor's prison. He goes home to tell Demelza, but the conversation veers off into her gleefully confessing to \"kissing and caressing\" Overly Trimmed Mustache. Ross and his man-baby ego go nuclear: \"I tell you, I do not admire you for this! It does you no credit!\" I guess that whole pot-kettle saying wasn't invented yet? Then both Demelza and Ross wonder why they are married. Welcome, you two. I've been wondering the same thing for MANY WEEKS OF MY LIFE.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>*takes deep breath* Anyway, where were we? Ah, yes. Ross storms off to brattily try on a military uniform. And Demelza storms off to casually deliver Verity's baby. No big deal.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of babies, Elizabeth is pregnant. Whatever.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/1287347561085.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49537\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/1287347561085.gif\" alt=\"1287347561085\" width=\"250\" height=\"250\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The following day, Ross heads to London to thank Blondie for the money. (Horace must have had a previous engagement because he's nowhere to be found.) It is revealed that Blondie is not, in fact, engaged because it's hard to find another hot dude who's obsessed with helping poor people (her new type). Ross mentions that Doc is so upset about not getting to hang out with Horace (and her, I guess) that he's heading off to war to get shot in the face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Verity's house, she becomes the Yoda to Demelza's Luke Skywalker: \u003cem>Follow your heart, you must! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza decides her heart is telling her to go over to Elizabeth's house and rip her a new one. She catches Elizabeth in the garden and their conversation goes a little something like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Eek!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>That's right. It's me. Let's do this.\u003c/em> *cracks knuckles*\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Um, does your husband know you're out and about without his permission?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I'm a feminist and I do what I want.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I'm not a feminist. I'm a humanist.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> *eye roll* \u003cem>Anyway, I came here to say I hate your guts and that you can have Ross because being married to him suuuuuucks and you deserve to feel that punishment. I'm moving back home to record my 18th century version of a Taylor Swift breakup album. Talk to ya never!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza walks off, thinking \u003cem>Nailed it!\u003c/em> to herself. She climbs over the new property fence on her way home and GETS SHOT (!!!) by one of Malfoy's Slytherin cronies, who then walks up and threatens to shoot her again until she's dead. Someone please Amazon Prime this dude a crate of chill.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, in town, Doc is getting drunk with all his other comrades who are also about to get shot in the face. Ross shows up because drinking and avoiding responsibility is his jam. They take a few tequila shots and then Ross complicates Doc's buzz by telling him he went to see Blondie and that's she's not actually engaged. \u003cstrong>Lesson:\u003c/strong> R\u003cem>emember to make sure gossip is true before you dramatically sign up to die in a war.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But that's not all! Blondie appears amid the soon-to-be-dead soldiers. \u003cem>Surprise! We're getting back together! Now let's go to your room and have sex before you sail off to your death! Yay!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_inline_mrxxpgl38j1qz4rgp.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49538\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_inline_mrxxpgl38j1qz4rgp.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_inline_mrxxpgl38j1qz4rgp\" width=\"470\" height=\"235\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the village pub, all the poor people are really drunk and really pissed about the fence shooter trying to kill all of them for weeks. They decide to recreate the mob scene from \u003cem>Beauty and the Beast\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza finds out and runs to warn Malfoy and Elizabeth, because when they go low, she goes high. But Malfoy and Elizabeth stay low by telling her that she's just jealous and is a liar and should go back to her scullery. All right then, enjoy being murdered and spending eternity in the ninth circle of Hell (that's the one for the treacherous; I looked it up).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Right on cue, the villagers set fire to the fence (and the rain). Malfoy and his Slytherin cronies meet them outside and threaten to shoot them. Demelza stands in the way of their guns because she's a good person and somehow isn't super jaded yet. A shot rings out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's Ross (it's cool he's doing something heroic and all, but still: ugh). He saves the day by calling off the mob, grabs Demelza and rides off. Elizabeth watches the whole thing go down from an upstairs window and has a Veruca Salt-level tantrum on the inside. Why can't she have Ross \u003cem>and\u003c/em> Malfoy's money at the same time?! Waaaah!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49547\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy.gif\" alt=\"giphy\" width=\"480\" height=\"343\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/veruca-salt-willy-wonka.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49546\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/veruca-salt-willy-wonka.gif\" alt=\"veruca-salt-willy-wonka\" width=\"500\" height=\"272\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, Elizabeth has something real to cry about. Malfoy has decided Francis Jr. is too tight with Elizabeth and too girly and must be sent away to boarding school ASAP to \"toughen up\" and to make room for Malfoy's spawn. Elizabeth stops herself from disagreeing because men have much bigger brains and know best.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at chez Ross, Demelza packs all her things. Ross eventually takes his head out of his butt long enough to notice.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"You're leaving me? I came back for you! I chose not to go to war!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"It's not my concern what you choose, only what I choose.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/vWJ5TaC.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49548\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/vWJ5TaC.gif\" alt=\"vwj5tac\" width=\"350\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After an entire season of always saying the worst possible thing, Ross finally uses his words to apologize and let Demelza know he loves her and won't let Elizabeth come between them anymore. IT'S ABOUT TIME! WAS THAT SO HARD?? JESUS.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Elizabeth's, Agatha swoops in to tell Elizabeth \u003cem>I told you so! \u003c/em>about Malfoy.\u003cem> \u003c/em>Still in deep denial, Elizabeth says that she thinks Malfoy will chill on all the evil plotting by the time their baby is born and maybe won't banish Francis Jr. away forever? Agatha is like, \u003cem>HA HA HA HA, you suck at basic math and biology. \u003c/em>Then Agatha invites Maury Povich out from behind a curtain to proclaim: \u003cem>Malfoy IS NOT the father! Ross is! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_l8hjeodHQy1qbipv3o1_400.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49549\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_l8hjeodHQy1qbipv3o1_400.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_l8hjeodhqy1qbipv3o1_400\" width=\"400\" height=\"267\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/N8cXOzd.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49550\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/N8cXOzd.gif\" alt=\"n8cxozd\" width=\"650\" height=\"276\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Demelza and Ross make out at the edge of a cliff. They both still hate their lives, but they have decided to hate their lives together. Glad this all sort of, kind of, but not really worked out for everyone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Since the season is now over, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> Ross. \u003c/strong>He put us through so much this season: the glacially paced adultery, the terrible life decisions, the man-baby tantrums, all that boring mining. No amount of shirtless scything will make it right. Actually, fill season 3 with that and I might revisit my pledge to hate Ross for life.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> Blondie. \u003c/strong>Props to her for giving up the whole I-wish-all-poor-people-would-just-die thing and transforming into a decent person. Here's hoping her boo doesn't get shot in the face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em> \u003cstrong>Horace\u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>. \u003c/strong>He is the light of my life, the fire of my loins. Um, scratch that last part; too creepy. The point is: I love this dog. He deserves a spin-off. Maybe Jill Stein can raise enough money to make it happen?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>SILVER: \u003c/em>Agatha. \u003c/strong>I want to grow up to be a no-nonsense lush who's always right about everything, don't you?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>GOLD:\u003c/em> Demelza. \u003c/strong>I mean, duh.\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That’s all, folks! It’s been a pleasure watching along with you this season. I'll be back in the recapping saddle starting January 15, 2017 for \u003ca href=\"http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/masterpiece/programs/series/victoria-s1/\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>. Until then, keep up with my other work \u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/author/ehapsis/\">all over \u003c/a>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/author/ehapsis/\" target=\"_blank\">KQED Pop\u003c/a>. You can also hear my opinions on all things pop culture on \u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/category/the-cooler/\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cem>The Cooler \u003c/em>podcast\u003c/a>. And if Twitter is your thing, \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\" target=\"_blank\">follow me\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/20/poldark-season-2-episode-8-recap-man-i-feel-like-a-woman/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 8 Recap: Man! I Feel Like A Woman!\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7 Recap: I'm In Love With A Monster\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/19/poldark-season-1-premiere-recap-stayin-alive/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1 Premiere Recap: Stayin’ Alive\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Someone almost gets their face set on fire. Someone gives birth. And then more fire.",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/20/poldark-season-2-episode-8-recap-man-i-feel-like-a-woman/\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Demelza briefly got her groove back, but then almost got raped (*sigh*). Will Demelza stumble upon a time machine with the ability to transport her to a time when women are truly equal and don't have to worry about that kind of stuff (not 2016, evidently)? Will Demelza finally get an annulment and go on a fun\u003cem> Thelma and Louise\u003c/em>-style road trip with Verity, minus the explosive ending? Will some merciful disaster occur inside the mine so it can close forever, sparing us from more boring underground storylines? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We kick things off with a scene of Demelza picking flowers. Maybe she's planning on leaving them on Ross' grave after she rightfully murders him dead? No one would blame you, Demelza. Just do it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the newly successful mine, everyone is acting like they're in a Rihanna music video, coins falling all over their twerking bodies. Ross is still sad, though, because he's a miserable person and, as the aphorism goes, mo' money, mo' problems.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/1351.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49534\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/1351.gif\" alt=\"1351\" width=\"400\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's mansion, Malfoy has officially moved in, causing Elizabeth's son to ask two really important questions: 1. Who dis? and 2. Are you two serious? Malfoy answers the second question with a strong yes, as he orders servants to take down the portrait of the boy's father, who was unceremoniously murdered by a random puddle just a few episodes ago.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a nearby forest, Malfoy has instructed his Slytherin cronies to construct a fence around Elizabeth's property. The poor people are like, \u003cem>Um, no, we hang out here\u003c/em>. One of the cronies responds by smashing a rifle butt into their faces.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Ross takes out a big sack of coins and tries to use their shininess to distract Demelza from the fact that he's a monster. Just like in the last episode, Demelza does not fall for it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_nqr5wkWggS1sjc5sqo1_r1_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-36401\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_nqr5wkWggS1sjc5sqo1_r1_500.gif\" alt=\"rihanna money throw gif\" width=\"500\" height=\"230\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Blondie's former home, Horace the Pug is nowhere to be found (*sob*). But Blondie's uncle is there, oversharing details about his \"unusually sweet\" urine with Doc. He apparently has \"the sugar sickness,\" which is the karmic price you pay when you stand in the way of Horace's mom's marriage. Sorry not sorry.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because Doc is saving his life and all, Blondie's uncle is like, \u003cem>So, hey, sorry about calling you trash a few weeks ago and promising to destroy you. Anywho, Blondie is engaged to someone who is definitely not you. K, thanks for all the help, bye! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Doc immediately enlists in the war, a move that's drama queen-y enough without what he says while doing it: \"I may not return to these shores for years. Or at all!\" And to think all of this could have been avoided if he had an outlet like LiveJournal to vent all his emo feelings.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Malfoy and Ross spend days and days sending sassy notes back and forth to each other. Finally, they agree to meet. Malfoy wants to get his hands on some of Ross' mine shares because he, too, wants to know what it feels like to be in a Rihanna music video.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For the umpteenth time, the phrase \"scullery maid\" is used as a pejorative. I'm sick of this show's uninspired trash talk, and so is Ross, who punches Malfoy in the face. Malfoy smashes Ross' head into a grandfather clock (cool!), Ross smashes Malfoy into a bookshelf (eh, not as cool, but ok!), and then Ross grabs Malfoy and tries to set his head on fire in the fireplace (THE COOLEST!). I hate you, Ross, but thanks for at least keeping things interesting.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After a few Slytherin cronies haul Ross out of the house, Malfoy runs upstairs to brag to Elizabeth about how he totally clobbered Ross. \"I hope he will have learned his lesson,\" she replies, despite the fact that she just found out Ross let his own family starve so that she could have some pocket change. Elizabeth, congratulations on being the worst on a show full of horrible people!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at chez Ross, Doc tells Demelza he's off to die in the war. Demelza is bummed because he's the only person left around these parts that she can stand. Their convo is interrupted by a bloody Ross. Demelza's entire body turns into a\u003cem> I'm-so-tired-of-your-crap\u003c/em> eye roll.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/annoyedface.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49535\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/annoyedface.gif\" alt=\"annoyedface\" width=\"500\" height=\"254\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, Ross finds her upstairs and tries to get a reaction out of her by threatening to go to war. Demelza handles it like a boss.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"Why? Cause your dearest friend is running away and so must you?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"Obviously the thought of leaving you and Jeremy...\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"Wouldn't be the first time you've considered such a thing. Go to war, Ross. Play soldiers. Or stay home and save all of Cornwall. What it is to be married to such a great man.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/b26.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49536\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/b26.gif\" alt=\"b26\" width=\"328\" height=\"284\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">Game, set, match.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The following day, Ross finds out Blondie was the secret benefactor who helped save him from debtor's prison. He goes home to tell Demelza, but the conversation veers off into her gleefully confessing to \"kissing and caressing\" Overly Trimmed Mustache. Ross and his man-baby ego go nuclear: \"I tell you, I do not admire you for this! It does you no credit!\" I guess that whole pot-kettle saying wasn't invented yet? Then both Demelza and Ross wonder why they are married. Welcome, you two. I've been wondering the same thing for MANY WEEKS OF MY LIFE.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>*takes deep breath* Anyway, where were we? Ah, yes. Ross storms off to brattily try on a military uniform. And Demelza storms off to casually deliver Verity's baby. No big deal.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of babies, Elizabeth is pregnant. Whatever.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/1287347561085.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49537\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/1287347561085.gif\" alt=\"1287347561085\" width=\"250\" height=\"250\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The following day, Ross heads to London to thank Blondie for the money. (Horace must have had a previous engagement because he's nowhere to be found.) It is revealed that Blondie is not, in fact, engaged because it's hard to find another hot dude who's obsessed with helping poor people (her new type). Ross mentions that Doc is so upset about not getting to hang out with Horace (and her, I guess) that he's heading off to war to get shot in the face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Verity's house, she becomes the Yoda to Demelza's Luke Skywalker: \u003cem>Follow your heart, you must! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza decides her heart is telling her to go over to Elizabeth's house and rip her a new one. She catches Elizabeth in the garden and their conversation goes a little something like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Eek!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>That's right. It's me. Let's do this.\u003c/em> *cracks knuckles*\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Um, does your husband know you're out and about without his permission?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I'm a feminist and I do what I want.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I'm not a feminist. I'm a humanist.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> *eye roll* \u003cem>Anyway, I came here to say I hate your guts and that you can have Ross because being married to him suuuuuucks and you deserve to feel that punishment. I'm moving back home to record my 18th century version of a Taylor Swift breakup album. Talk to ya never!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza walks off, thinking \u003cem>Nailed it!\u003c/em> to herself. She climbs over the new property fence on her way home and GETS SHOT (!!!) by one of Malfoy's Slytherin cronies, who then walks up and threatens to shoot her again until she's dead. Someone please Amazon Prime this dude a crate of chill.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, in town, Doc is getting drunk with all his other comrades who are also about to get shot in the face. Ross shows up because drinking and avoiding responsibility is his jam. They take a few tequila shots and then Ross complicates Doc's buzz by telling him he went to see Blondie and that's she's not actually engaged. \u003cstrong>Lesson:\u003c/strong> R\u003cem>emember to make sure gossip is true before you dramatically sign up to die in a war.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But that's not all! Blondie appears amid the soon-to-be-dead soldiers. \u003cem>Surprise! We're getting back together! Now let's go to your room and have sex before you sail off to your death! Yay!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_inline_mrxxpgl38j1qz4rgp.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49538\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_inline_mrxxpgl38j1qz4rgp.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_inline_mrxxpgl38j1qz4rgp\" width=\"470\" height=\"235\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the village pub, all the poor people are really drunk and really pissed about the fence shooter trying to kill all of them for weeks. They decide to recreate the mob scene from \u003cem>Beauty and the Beast\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza finds out and runs to warn Malfoy and Elizabeth, because when they go low, she goes high. But Malfoy and Elizabeth stay low by telling her that she's just jealous and is a liar and should go back to her scullery. All right then, enjoy being murdered and spending eternity in the ninth circle of Hell (that's the one for the treacherous; I looked it up).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Right on cue, the villagers set fire to the fence (and the rain). Malfoy and his Slytherin cronies meet them outside and threaten to shoot them. Demelza stands in the way of their guns because she's a good person and somehow isn't super jaded yet. A shot rings out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's Ross (it's cool he's doing something heroic and all, but still: ugh). He saves the day by calling off the mob, grabs Demelza and rides off. Elizabeth watches the whole thing go down from an upstairs window and has a Veruca Salt-level tantrum on the inside. Why can't she have Ross \u003cem>and\u003c/em> Malfoy's money at the same time?! Waaaah!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49547\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy.gif\" alt=\"giphy\" width=\"480\" height=\"343\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/veruca-salt-willy-wonka.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49546\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/veruca-salt-willy-wonka.gif\" alt=\"veruca-salt-willy-wonka\" width=\"500\" height=\"272\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, Elizabeth has something real to cry about. Malfoy has decided Francis Jr. is too tight with Elizabeth and too girly and must be sent away to boarding school ASAP to \"toughen up\" and to make room for Malfoy's spawn. Elizabeth stops herself from disagreeing because men have much bigger brains and know best.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at chez Ross, Demelza packs all her things. Ross eventually takes his head out of his butt long enough to notice.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"You're leaving me? I came back for you! I chose not to go to war!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"It's not my concern what you choose, only what I choose.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/vWJ5TaC.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49548\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/vWJ5TaC.gif\" alt=\"vwj5tac\" width=\"350\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After an entire season of always saying the worst possible thing, Ross finally uses his words to apologize and let Demelza know he loves her and won't let Elizabeth come between them anymore. IT'S ABOUT TIME! WAS THAT SO HARD?? JESUS.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Elizabeth's, Agatha swoops in to tell Elizabeth \u003cem>I told you so! \u003c/em>about Malfoy.\u003cem> \u003c/em>Still in deep denial, Elizabeth says that she thinks Malfoy will chill on all the evil plotting by the time their baby is born and maybe won't banish Francis Jr. away forever? Agatha is like, \u003cem>HA HA HA HA, you suck at basic math and biology. \u003c/em>Then Agatha invites Maury Povich out from behind a curtain to proclaim: \u003cem>Malfoy IS NOT the father! Ross is! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_l8hjeodHQy1qbipv3o1_400.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49549\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_l8hjeodHQy1qbipv3o1_400.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_l8hjeodhqy1qbipv3o1_400\" width=\"400\" height=\"267\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/N8cXOzd.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-49550\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/N8cXOzd.gif\" alt=\"n8cxozd\" width=\"650\" height=\"276\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Demelza and Ross make out at the edge of a cliff. They both still hate their lives, but they have decided to hate their lives together. Glad this all sort of, kind of, but not really worked out for everyone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Since the season is now over, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> Ross. \u003c/strong>He put us through so much this season: the glacially paced adultery, the terrible life decisions, the man-baby tantrums, all that boring mining. No amount of shirtless scything will make it right. Actually, fill season 3 with that and I might revisit my pledge to hate Ross for life.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> Blondie. \u003c/strong>Props to her for giving up the whole I-wish-all-poor-people-would-just-die thing and transforming into a decent person. Here's hoping her boo doesn't get shot in the face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em> \u003cstrong>Horace\u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>. \u003c/strong>He is the light of my life, the fire of my loins. Um, scratch that last part; too creepy. The point is: I love this dog. He deserves a spin-off. Maybe Jill Stein can raise enough money to make it happen?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>SILVER: \u003c/em>Agatha. \u003c/strong>I want to grow up to be a no-nonsense lush who's always right about everything, don't you?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>GOLD:\u003c/em> Demelza. \u003c/strong>I mean, duh.\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That’s all, folks! It’s been a pleasure watching along with you this season. I'll be back in the recapping saddle starting January 15, 2017 for \u003ca href=\"http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/masterpiece/programs/series/victoria-s1/\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>. Until then, keep up with my other work \u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/author/ehapsis/\">all over \u003c/a>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/author/ehapsis/\" target=\"_blank\">KQED Pop\u003c/a>. You can also hear my opinions on all things pop culture on \u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/category/the-cooler/\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cem>The Cooler \u003c/em>podcast\u003c/a>. And if Twitter is your thing, \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\" target=\"_blank\">follow me\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/20/poldark-season-2-episode-8-recap-man-i-feel-like-a-woman/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 8 Recap: Man! I Feel Like A Woman!\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7 Recap: I'm In Love With A Monster\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 8 Recap: Man! I Feel Like A Woman!",
"title": "'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 8 Recap: Man! I Feel Like A Woman!",
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"content": "\u003cp>In the \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Ross completed his transformation into a raging monster by cheating on Demelza (just like we knew he would). Will Demelza burn all his possessions and then use the fire to light a cigarette? Will Ross and Elizabeth do everyone a favor and run off to Bali, never to be seen or heard from again? Will Horace the Pug make a much-needed cameo, just 'cause? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We find Ross in his office, deep in worried thought. He's stressing over how he betrayed Demelza, right? Nope! He's thinking about the mine, of course, because he's a sociopath. But let's focus on the positive: he has a black eye, courtesy of Demelza's right hook, and the mine has officially closed. Boring will-they-won't-they-find-copper subplot, begone!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at home, Demelza is officially over all of it. She's decided that, from now on, she will have breakfast served to her in bed and will refuse to do any chores. Being prissy and fancy worked out for Elizabeth, after all. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_n41xg8yEoz1qgokjco2_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48736\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_n41xg8yEoz1qgokjco2_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_n41xg8yeoz1qgokjco2_500\" width=\"500\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While commuting, Ross runs into Malfoy and they argue over who has the bigger penis (not literally, but isn't that what all of their tiffs are really about?). The answer is not revealed, but one thing is for sure: they're both pricks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's house, she is very impatient for Ross to come back and proclaim, \u003cem>I dumped my wife and baby! Now let's have some more quasi-consensual sex! \u003c/em>She decides a bit of binge-drinking is in order. Alcoholic-in-residence Agatha approves.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/raw-13.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48737\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/raw-13.gif\" alt=\"raw-13\" width=\"306\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Ross arrives home and finds Demelza drinking tea and snacking in bed (you go, girl!). Demelza offers to help him pack (again, you go, girl!). Ross changes the subject to the mine. Nice try, Ross! Literally no one cares! When that distraction doesn't work, Ross changes tactics:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"I realize that your pride is wounded.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"My pride?? 'Tis not my pride that is wounded, Ross. 'Tis my pride \u003cem>in you!\u003c/em>\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-33.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48682\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-33.gif\" alt=\"giphy-33\" width=\"480\" height=\"171\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's house, she's still drunk and waiting. Good luck with that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Ross whines about Demelza icing him out. She responds that he can go cry about it on his pillow, which is now on an uncomfortable cot in the library.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross continues to dig his hole deeper and deeper with tone-deaf statements like: \"In the moment, I admit it, there was no thought of you\" and \"Perhaps I might've hoped for some understanding.\" Since words aren't really getting them anywhere, Demelza decides to communicate her feelings through flinging everything off the dinner table.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-35.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-48701\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-35.gif\" alt=\"giphy-35\" width=\"500\" height=\"271\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That's a start. Keep going.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-34.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48697\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-34.gif\" alt=\"giphy-34\" width=\"500\" height=\"306\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That's more like it! Now, put your back into it!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-36.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48700\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-36.gif\" alt=\"giphy-36\" width=\"500\" height=\"202\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Yes, that's it! Let it all out, Demelza!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/real-housewives-new-jersey-drama-back.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-48698\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/real-housewives-new-jersey-drama-back.gif\" alt=\"real-housewives-new-jersey-drama-back\" width=\"500\" height=\"320\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Throw furniture at him! He's had it coming for so long.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/throw-table-catch-chair.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-48699\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/throw-table-catch-chair.gif\" alt=\"throw-table-catch-chair\" width=\"600\" height=\"338\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>*satisfied sigh* I feel better, don't you?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Malfoy's, his lavish wedding planning grinds to a halt when he receives a letter from Elizabeth asking to postpone the wedding. A terrible setback for #TeamMalfoy'sPenisIsBigger.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at chez Ross, a servant arrives to formally invite Ross and Demelza to a rave. Demelza is like, \u003cem>SIGH. No thanks. Gotta stay home and fantasize about pulling a Lorena Bobbitt.\u003c/em> But then a thought strikes her. She will put on her red shoes and dance the blues (and maybe tongue wrestle a dude or two)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At Elizabeth's, she hears horse hooves! She freaks out about Ross' return. What will she say? How should she act? Turns out she doesn't have to worry about answering those questions because it's just Verity. Elizabeth promptly faints.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/CherylLaugh.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48702\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/CherylLaugh.gif\" alt=\"cheryllaugh\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Demelza pulls out her sexy red dress. She sings the lyrics to Shania Twain's \"Man! I Feel Like A Woman!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>I'm going out tonight, I'm feelin' alright\u003cbr>\nGonna let it all hang out\u003cbr>\nWant to make some noise, Really raise my voice\u003cbr>\nYeah, I want to scream and shout\u003cbr>\nThe best thing about being a woman\u003cbr>\nIs the prerogative to have a little fun and...\u003cbr>\nOh oh oh go totally crazy, forget I'm a lady!\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>In town, Ross takes a business meeting with some dude who wants him to join in on a profitable business.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M7HJH0IH3dc\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At some fancy estate, Demelza is getting settled in before the party. She takes a much-deserved shot.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/800516981392687104\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza makes her grand entrance to the party. She's wearing makeup! She has a fake mole and a little heart drawn on one breast! All the women give her dirty looks and all the men slobber. Snatch that revenge, girl! You've earned it!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Malfoy tries to get his Slytherin crony to seduce her so as to embarrass Ross, but another gets to her first: the military dude with the overly-trimmed mustache.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's house, Verity tells Elizabeth she knows what's bothering her. She must not feel right about marrying Malfoy because her heart still belongs to Francis, right? Surely, getting over the very recent death of one's husband must still be so very hard. Elizabeth pulls a muscle pretending that yes, all these hysterics are totally about Francis and not his much hotter cousin:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/a7c002df18.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48710\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/a7c002df18.gif\" alt=\"a7c002df18\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the rave, Demelza works up a sweat, twerking and dabbing and do-si-do-ing with Overly Trimmed Mustache. They take a break to chat about name origins. Demelza is Cornish for \"thy sweetness.\" Overly Trimmed Mustache tries to flirt: \"I would rather it meant \u003cem>my\u003c/em> sweetness.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-37.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48711\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-37.gif\" alt=\"giphy-37\" width=\"310\" height=\"205\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He's corny to the max, but he'll have to do. Demelza takes him outside and they make out. He seems like the kind of bad kisser that's only practiced on the back of his hand and he probably smells a little because he wears the same outfit every day of his life, but, you know, whatever it takes to get back at trifling, no-good Ross.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After the party, Demelza goes to her room and can't decide if she should lock her door or not. She takes too long to make up her mind and Overly Trimmed Mustache slips in, wearing a brand new outfit! (He must read all the mean things I write about his uniform in these recaps!) He immediately makes it clear that he is DTF.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza is not. Turns out she takes her marriage vows more seriously than Ross. Surely, Overly Trimmed Mustache will understand, right? Nope! He first tries to pressure her with words: \"Think for a moment of me, who's been looking forward to this encounter. Your duty now is not to your husband, but to me.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-38.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48713\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-38.gif\" alt=\"giphy-38\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despite Demelza's polite refusal, Overly Trimmed Mustache tries to rape her anyway because we didn't get enough of that during the last episode. Demelza manages to physically overpower him and gets him to leave. She crumples down onto the bed and cries the same thing I do every Sunday night: \"Ross, I hate you! I hate you!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, Slytherin Crony and the old dude who hosted the rave argue outside of Demelza's door over who gets \"first pick.\" She listens as they consider whether she might be into a threesome and ultimately toss a coin over her. One rape attempt is more than enough for a lifetime so Demelza flees out of the window.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After a long night of drinking at the bar with his buddies and being emo over his failed mine, Ross heads to Elizabeth's house. She sees him from the window and thinks, \u003cem>Yay! I won! He's leaving his wife and child for me! Weeee!\u003c/em> But then Ross changes his mind and gallops away.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-39.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48721\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-39.gif\" alt=\"giphy-39\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross gets home to find that Demelza has been out all night. How dare she go somewhere without his permission! Doesn't she know she's Ross' property? Since I'm not there in person, Mr. and Mrs. Pigpen stand in for me and give him deadly, sideways \u003cem>Are you f-ing serious?\u003c/em> looks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross races around Cornwall to find Demelza and make sure no one has been kissing her. He finds her walking in the sea, mascara tears all over her face. Instead of apologizing for everything that's happened since he came into her life, he tells her this: \"If you could bide a while, have a little patience, this thing will play itself out... sooner or later.\" Wow. Add this to the long list of reasons why I wish Ross had been found guilty and hanged earlier this season. Demelza's reaction says it all:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-48734\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-800x444.png\" alt=\"screen-shot-2016-11-20-at-4-35-45-pm\" width=\"800\" height=\"444\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-800x444.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-768x426.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-1020x566.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-1180x655.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-960x533.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-672x372.png 672w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-1038x576.png 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-240x133.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-375x208.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-520x289.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM.png 1231w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's house, she chucks her needlepointing and goes on a rant that would even make Kanye jealous about how Ross always abandons her. There was that whole fighting-for-his-country-and-barely-surviving thing, and now this? Screw it! She's tired of waiting!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cut to her wedding with Malfoy. She apparently didn't get the memo that \"None of the above\" was an option.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And the bad news keeps rolling in: Ross finds enough money to reopen the mine.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/why.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48722\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/why.gif\" alt=\"why\" width=\"245\" height=\"160\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sensing that I am \u003cem>this close\u003c/em> to turning off this episode and quitting this recap, the writers throw me a bone -- a dog bone, to be precise. Horace the Pug is back!!!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-48733\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-800x446.jpg\" alt=\"horaceeee\" width=\"800\" height=\"446\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-800x446.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-160x89.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-768x428.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-1020x569.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-1180x658.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-960x535.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-240x134.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-375x209.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-520x290.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee.jpg 1230w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And he's wearing a Ruth Bader Ginsburg-esque jabot!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/12/tumblr_ml252mhGRm1qedlsro1_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-10201\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/12/tumblr_ml252mhGRm1qedlsro1_250.gif\" alt=\"beyonce god is real\" width=\"245\" height=\"193\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In an alternate universe where everything is good, the rest of the episode is just Horace snacking and napping and playing and barking. But we live in a cruel world, so we have to watch Ross work in the mine some more. He finds a lot of valuable tin.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/no-one-cares-hunter-E2-99-A5-35130856-391-331.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48723\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/no-one-cares-hunter-E2-99-A5-35130856-391-331.gif\" alt=\"no-one-cares-hunter-e2-99-a5-35130856-391-331\" width=\"391\" height=\"331\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross runs home to tell Demelza that he's about to be kind of rich. Demelza is like, \u003cem>Keep it.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_nqr5wkWggS1sjc5sqo1_r1_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-36401\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_nqr5wkWggS1sjc5sqo1_r1_500.gif\" alt=\"rihanna money throw gif\" width=\"500\" height=\"230\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Needing his baby-man ego stroked, Ross rushes over to Elizabeth's house and sees her returning from her honeymoon with Malfoy. Elizabeth spots him and gives him a death glare. Like always, Ross feels sorry for himself.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> Ross.\u003c/strong> Demelza said it best: \"Ross, I hate you! I hate you!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> Verity. \u003c/strong>For causing Elizabeth to faint.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em> \u003cstrong>\u003cstrong>Whoever Made Horace's Jabot\u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>\u003cstrong>. \u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>Bless this craftsperson for making the world more beautiful and tender.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>SILVER: \u003c/em>Horace\u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>. \u003c/strong>The rainbow that springs forth from this dark cloud of a show when we need it most.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>GOLD:\u003c/em> Demelza. \u003c/strong>So glad she got her party on. And kudos to her for not murdering Ross, chopping him into little bits, and using said little bits as bait on her next fishing trip. I bow to her self-restraint.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a> and read all the \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other recaps\u003c/a> below.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7: I'm In Love With A Monster\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/19/poldark-season-1-premiere-recap-stayin-alive/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1 Premiere Recap: Stayin’ Alive\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Demelza gets her groove back.",
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"title": "'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 8 Recap: Man! I Feel Like A Woman! | KQED",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In the \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Ross completed his transformation into a raging monster by cheating on Demelza (just like we knew he would). Will Demelza burn all his possessions and then use the fire to light a cigarette? Will Ross and Elizabeth do everyone a favor and run off to Bali, never to be seen or heard from again? Will Horace the Pug make a much-needed cameo, just 'cause? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We find Ross in his office, deep in worried thought. He's stressing over how he betrayed Demelza, right? Nope! He's thinking about the mine, of course, because he's a sociopath. But let's focus on the positive: he has a black eye, courtesy of Demelza's right hook, and the mine has officially closed. Boring will-they-won't-they-find-copper subplot, begone!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at home, Demelza is officially over all of it. She's decided that, from now on, she will have breakfast served to her in bed and will refuse to do any chores. Being prissy and fancy worked out for Elizabeth, after all. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_n41xg8yEoz1qgokjco2_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48736\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_n41xg8yEoz1qgokjco2_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_n41xg8yeoz1qgokjco2_500\" width=\"500\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While commuting, Ross runs into Malfoy and they argue over who has the bigger penis (not literally, but isn't that what all of their tiffs are really about?). The answer is not revealed, but one thing is for sure: they're both pricks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's house, she is very impatient for Ross to come back and proclaim, \u003cem>I dumped my wife and baby! Now let's have some more quasi-consensual sex! \u003c/em>She decides a bit of binge-drinking is in order. Alcoholic-in-residence Agatha approves.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/raw-13.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48737\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/raw-13.gif\" alt=\"raw-13\" width=\"306\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Ross arrives home and finds Demelza drinking tea and snacking in bed (you go, girl!). Demelza offers to help him pack (again, you go, girl!). Ross changes the subject to the mine. Nice try, Ross! Literally no one cares! When that distraction doesn't work, Ross changes tactics:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"I realize that your pride is wounded.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"My pride?? 'Tis not my pride that is wounded, Ross. 'Tis my pride \u003cem>in you!\u003c/em>\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-33.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48682\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-33.gif\" alt=\"giphy-33\" width=\"480\" height=\"171\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's house, she's still drunk and waiting. Good luck with that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Ross whines about Demelza icing him out. She responds that he can go cry about it on his pillow, which is now on an uncomfortable cot in the library.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross continues to dig his hole deeper and deeper with tone-deaf statements like: \"In the moment, I admit it, there was no thought of you\" and \"Perhaps I might've hoped for some understanding.\" Since words aren't really getting them anywhere, Demelza decides to communicate her feelings through flinging everything off the dinner table.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-35.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-48701\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-35.gif\" alt=\"giphy-35\" width=\"500\" height=\"271\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That's a start. Keep going.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-34.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48697\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-34.gif\" alt=\"giphy-34\" width=\"500\" height=\"306\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That's more like it! Now, put your back into it!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-36.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48700\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-36.gif\" alt=\"giphy-36\" width=\"500\" height=\"202\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Yes, that's it! Let it all out, Demelza!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/real-housewives-new-jersey-drama-back.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-48698\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/real-housewives-new-jersey-drama-back.gif\" alt=\"real-housewives-new-jersey-drama-back\" width=\"500\" height=\"320\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Throw furniture at him! He's had it coming for so long.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/throw-table-catch-chair.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-48699\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/throw-table-catch-chair.gif\" alt=\"throw-table-catch-chair\" width=\"600\" height=\"338\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>*satisfied sigh* I feel better, don't you?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Malfoy's, his lavish wedding planning grinds to a halt when he receives a letter from Elizabeth asking to postpone the wedding. A terrible setback for #TeamMalfoy'sPenisIsBigger.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at chez Ross, a servant arrives to formally invite Ross and Demelza to a rave. Demelza is like, \u003cem>SIGH. No thanks. Gotta stay home and fantasize about pulling a Lorena Bobbitt.\u003c/em> But then a thought strikes her. She will put on her red shoes and dance the blues (and maybe tongue wrestle a dude or two)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At Elizabeth's, she hears horse hooves! She freaks out about Ross' return. What will she say? How should she act? Turns out she doesn't have to worry about answering those questions because it's just Verity. Elizabeth promptly faints.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/CherylLaugh.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48702\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/CherylLaugh.gif\" alt=\"cheryllaugh\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Demelza pulls out her sexy red dress. She sings the lyrics to Shania Twain's \"Man! I Feel Like A Woman!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>I'm going out tonight, I'm feelin' alright\u003cbr>\nGonna let it all hang out\u003cbr>\nWant to make some noise, Really raise my voice\u003cbr>\nYeah, I want to scream and shout\u003cbr>\nThe best thing about being a woman\u003cbr>\nIs the prerogative to have a little fun and...\u003cbr>\nOh oh oh go totally crazy, forget I'm a lady!\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>In town, Ross takes a business meeting with some dude who wants him to join in on a profitable business.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/M7HJH0IH3dc'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/M7HJH0IH3dc'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>At some fancy estate, Demelza is getting settled in before the party. She takes a much-deserved shot.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>Demelza makes her grand entrance to the party. She's wearing makeup! She has a fake mole and a little heart drawn on one breast! All the women give her dirty looks and all the men slobber. Snatch that revenge, girl! You've earned it!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Malfoy tries to get his Slytherin crony to seduce her so as to embarrass Ross, but another gets to her first: the military dude with the overly-trimmed mustache.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's house, Verity tells Elizabeth she knows what's bothering her. She must not feel right about marrying Malfoy because her heart still belongs to Francis, right? Surely, getting over the very recent death of one's husband must still be so very hard. Elizabeth pulls a muscle pretending that yes, all these hysterics are totally about Francis and not his much hotter cousin:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/a7c002df18.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48710\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/a7c002df18.gif\" alt=\"a7c002df18\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the rave, Demelza works up a sweat, twerking and dabbing and do-si-do-ing with Overly Trimmed Mustache. They take a break to chat about name origins. Demelza is Cornish for \"thy sweetness.\" Overly Trimmed Mustache tries to flirt: \"I would rather it meant \u003cem>my\u003c/em> sweetness.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-37.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48711\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-37.gif\" alt=\"giphy-37\" width=\"310\" height=\"205\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He's corny to the max, but he'll have to do. Demelza takes him outside and they make out. He seems like the kind of bad kisser that's only practiced on the back of his hand and he probably smells a little because he wears the same outfit every day of his life, but, you know, whatever it takes to get back at trifling, no-good Ross.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After the party, Demelza goes to her room and can't decide if she should lock her door or not. She takes too long to make up her mind and Overly Trimmed Mustache slips in, wearing a brand new outfit! (He must read all the mean things I write about his uniform in these recaps!) He immediately makes it clear that he is DTF.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza is not. Turns out she takes her marriage vows more seriously than Ross. Surely, Overly Trimmed Mustache will understand, right? Nope! He first tries to pressure her with words: \"Think for a moment of me, who's been looking forward to this encounter. Your duty now is not to your husband, but to me.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-38.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48713\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-38.gif\" alt=\"giphy-38\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despite Demelza's polite refusal, Overly Trimmed Mustache tries to rape her anyway because we didn't get enough of that during the last episode. Demelza manages to physically overpower him and gets him to leave. She crumples down onto the bed and cries the same thing I do every Sunday night: \"Ross, I hate you! I hate you!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, Slytherin Crony and the old dude who hosted the rave argue outside of Demelza's door over who gets \"first pick.\" She listens as they consider whether she might be into a threesome and ultimately toss a coin over her. One rape attempt is more than enough for a lifetime so Demelza flees out of the window.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After a long night of drinking at the bar with his buddies and being emo over his failed mine, Ross heads to Elizabeth's house. She sees him from the window and thinks, \u003cem>Yay! I won! He's leaving his wife and child for me! Weeee!\u003c/em> But then Ross changes his mind and gallops away.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-39.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48721\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-39.gif\" alt=\"giphy-39\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross gets home to find that Demelza has been out all night. How dare she go somewhere without his permission! Doesn't she know she's Ross' property? Since I'm not there in person, Mr. and Mrs. Pigpen stand in for me and give him deadly, sideways \u003cem>Are you f-ing serious?\u003c/em> looks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross races around Cornwall to find Demelza and make sure no one has been kissing her. He finds her walking in the sea, mascara tears all over her face. Instead of apologizing for everything that's happened since he came into her life, he tells her this: \"If you could bide a while, have a little patience, this thing will play itself out... sooner or later.\" Wow. Add this to the long list of reasons why I wish Ross had been found guilty and hanged earlier this season. Demelza's reaction says it all:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-48734\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-800x444.png\" alt=\"screen-shot-2016-11-20-at-4-35-45-pm\" width=\"800\" height=\"444\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-800x444.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-768x426.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-1020x566.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-1180x655.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-960x533.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-672x372.png 672w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-1038x576.png 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-240x133.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-375x208.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM-520x289.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-20-at-4.35.45-PM.png 1231w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's house, she chucks her needlepointing and goes on a rant that would even make Kanye jealous about how Ross always abandons her. There was that whole fighting-for-his-country-and-barely-surviving thing, and now this? Screw it! She's tired of waiting!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cut to her wedding with Malfoy. She apparently didn't get the memo that \"None of the above\" was an option.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And the bad news keeps rolling in: Ross finds enough money to reopen the mine.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/why.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48722\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/why.gif\" alt=\"why\" width=\"245\" height=\"160\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sensing that I am \u003cem>this close\u003c/em> to turning off this episode and quitting this recap, the writers throw me a bone -- a dog bone, to be precise. Horace the Pug is back!!!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-48733\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-800x446.jpg\" alt=\"horaceeee\" width=\"800\" height=\"446\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-800x446.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-160x89.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-768x428.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-1020x569.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-1180x658.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-960x535.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-240x134.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-375x209.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee-520x290.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horaceeee.jpg 1230w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And he's wearing a Ruth Bader Ginsburg-esque jabot!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/12/tumblr_ml252mhGRm1qedlsro1_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-10201\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/12/tumblr_ml252mhGRm1qedlsro1_250.gif\" alt=\"beyonce god is real\" width=\"245\" height=\"193\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In an alternate universe where everything is good, the rest of the episode is just Horace snacking and napping and playing and barking. But we live in a cruel world, so we have to watch Ross work in the mine some more. He finds a lot of valuable tin.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/no-one-cares-hunter-E2-99-A5-35130856-391-331.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48723\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/no-one-cares-hunter-E2-99-A5-35130856-391-331.gif\" alt=\"no-one-cares-hunter-e2-99-a5-35130856-391-331\" width=\"391\" height=\"331\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross runs home to tell Demelza that he's about to be kind of rich. Demelza is like, \u003cem>Keep it.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_nqr5wkWggS1sjc5sqo1_r1_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-36401\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_nqr5wkWggS1sjc5sqo1_r1_500.gif\" alt=\"rihanna money throw gif\" width=\"500\" height=\"230\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Needing his baby-man ego stroked, Ross rushes over to Elizabeth's house and sees her returning from her honeymoon with Malfoy. Elizabeth spots him and gives him a death glare. Like always, Ross feels sorry for himself.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> Ross.\u003c/strong> Demelza said it best: \"Ross, I hate you! I hate you!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> Verity. \u003c/strong>For causing Elizabeth to faint.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em> \u003cstrong>\u003cstrong>Whoever Made Horace's Jabot\u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>\u003cstrong>. \u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>Bless this craftsperson for making the world more beautiful and tender.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>SILVER: \u003c/em>Horace\u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>. \u003c/strong>The rainbow that springs forth from this dark cloud of a show when we need it most.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>GOLD:\u003c/em> Demelza. \u003c/strong>So glad she got her party on. And kudos to her for not murdering Ross, chopping him into little bits, and using said little bits as bait on her next fishing trip. I bow to her self-restraint.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a> and read all the \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other recaps\u003c/a> below.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/13/poldark-season-2-episode-7-recap-im-in-love-with-a-monster/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7: I'm In Love With A Monster\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7 Recap: I'm In Love With A Monster",
"title": "'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 7 Recap: I'm In Love With A Monster",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>In the \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Ross did everything in his power to get in trouble with the law again, Demelza did everything in her power to not stab him, and Murphy's Law did everything in its power to prevent Doc, Blondie and Horace the Pug from eloping and finding bliss. Will Ross be hanged, turning \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> into a show only about Demelza, Agatha, and all the cool animals? Will Demelza finally get an annulment and pursue a career as a pop star in the big city? Will Elizabeth take a much-needed break from being super-duper annoying? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After barely escaping arrest and death, Ross should be lying low right about now. He's not, of course. Instead, he's getting letters from his Illegal Smuggling Boss. Demelza has had it. Officially.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"Judas, Ross! Will you never learn?!?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"Possibly not.\" *smug smirk*\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Kill him, Demelza. Just kill him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Moments later, Ross is already in court. The judge is gleefully ready to punish him, but Ross brings in three surprise alibis. Case dismissed! Hmm, that was anti-climactic. Doc also gets off with a small fine for building that warning bonfire. Rich white dudes have all the luck. Remember when this same judge sentenced a poor person to several years in a typhus-infested prison for stealing a chicken and a different poor person to the gallows for throwing poop in Parliament Wannabe's face. Yeah.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside the courthouse, Doc pretends he's totally over Blondie:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T55vZAITLI8\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But on the inside, he's like:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/200.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-46932\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/200.gif\" alt=\"200\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at home, Ross apologizes to Demelza for all his really terrible decisions over the entire time they've known each other. \"I will never again be guilty of such recklessness.\" Ha ha ha... yeah, right.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/809dea98d6ba5bde1e3300dcb0191eb4.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-46933\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/809dea98d6ba5bde1e3300dcb0191eb4.gif\" alt=\"whitney houston laugh not amused gif\" width=\"235\" height=\"183\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Doc gets a bunch of mail. Blondie has returned all his letters and written one of her own, which basically reads like the lyrics to \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ggWyUEuGcWY\">JoJo's 2004 single \"Leave (Get Out)\"\u003c/a>:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>Get out! Leave! Right now!\u003cbr>\nIt's the end of you and me\u003cbr>\nYou said that you would treat me right\u003cbr>\nBut you was just a waste of time.\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>The next day, Demelza is in the town square, minding her business, when Elizabeth calls her over to her carriage.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \"I've been meaning to call upon you to thank you for your kindness these past few months.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"In lending you my husband?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \"...in a manner of speaking.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"Oh, you're welcome to him, just so long as you remember where he belongs and send him back to me when you're done with him.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/1564jzc.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47349\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/1564jzc.gif\" alt=\"1564jzc\" width=\"360\" height=\"203\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Memo to everyone in Cornwall: Demelza is not the one to mess with.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, Demelza, still on the war path, confronts Ross about how he sold all his shares in the old mine, information she received from a stranger in town. Ross is like,\u003cem> Oh, yeah, I guess I forgot to tell you! I gave away almost all of our money to my ex-girlfriend, leading us to live in squalor for months and months, because she's a delicate flower and needs nice things more than you do. That's not going to be a problem, right?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza has two options:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Option A: Break a glass and use it to disembowel him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Option B: Silently stew.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She unfortunately chooses Option B.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/Kristen-Wiig-pissed.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-38909\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/Kristen-Wiig-pissed.gif\" alt=\"Kristen-Wiig-pissed\" width=\"343\" height=\"194\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Demelza grabs a bottle of brandy and runs to some random pregnant girl's house. Random Mom-To-Be is in labor and needs to get blackout drunk immediately (I don't blame her). She thankfully does not die from preeclampsia (still and forever traumatized by Sybil's fate in \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey/\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a>).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Her baby daddy comes home to meet his new child and brings good news from the mine: they found tin! That's cool and all, but this means my dream of the mine closing forever and never having to hear about it again has been dashed yet again. You can't always get what you want, I suppose.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's house, she's complaining (you don't say!) about how she doesn't have a man to do all the thinking for her anymore. Mid-rant, she notices a bunch of dudes (sent by Malfoy to scare her into marrying him) digging in her front yard for tin. Her mother comes to the window to take a look and randomly has a stroke.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And it's bad. She'll need constant care for the rest of her life. Elizabeth is really bummed she has to be a nurse now... unless Malfoy pays for one? She invites him over and he promptly proposes. WTF is going on? Doesn't anyone date around here? Elizabeth is unconvinced, until he reminds her how big his house is. She quickly changes her tune, while picturing her future of drowning in gold coins:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-30.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-47358 size-full\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-30.gif\" alt=\"giphy-30\" width=\"318\" height=\"244\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the mine, Ross thinks they should secure the ceiling with timbers before continuing to look for more tin. Everyone else is like, \u003cem>Naaaaah\u003c/em>. Someone's totally going to die.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the woods, Doc rides by the spot where he and Blondie made out next to a horse butt. He hums a melancholy melody that, two centuries later, will be adapted into a hit single titled \"My Heart Will Go On.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/xYwXYrK.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47450\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/xYwXYrK.gif\" alt=\"xywxyrk\" width=\"499\" height=\"269\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At chez Ross, Verity pays a visit and Demelza shares her worries that Ross is going to cheat on her with Elizabeth. Verity is like, \u003cem>Don't even worry about it! That would never happen!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dear Demelza, find more perceptive friends. Worry about it. It \u003cem>will\u003c/em> happen.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the library, Verity's obnoxiously cheerful stepson suggests that Doc join the Navy. Always full of bad ideas and terrible advice, Ross seconds the suggestion: \u003cem>Go for it! You might die, but who cares! \u003c/em>Broken-hearted Doc likes the idea of dying and plans to consider the idea.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The following day, Ross' War BFF and his overly-trimmed mustache show up again. Demelza is like, \u003cem>Um, last time you were here you held me at gunpoint and tried to arrest my husband.\u003c/em> He responds with Rod Stewart lyrics:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Have I told you lately that I love you?\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n\u003cem>Have I told you there's no one else above you?\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n\u003cem>Fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n\u003cem>Ease my troubles, that's what you do.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza is like, \u003cem>Um, cool. Thanks? \u003c/em>And then runs from the room.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/GIF.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47425\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/GIF.gif\" alt=\"gif\" width=\"500\" height=\"210\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at the mine, the ceiling caves in and two workers die, including Random New Mom's baby daddy. That's sad, but this revives my dream of the mine closing permanently and never having to hear about it again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/evil-smile.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47451\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/evil-smile.gif\" alt=\"evil-smile\" width=\"275\" height=\"251\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At Elizabeth's house, Malfoy comes over to gloat about Ross' dead workers. Agatha thinks, \u003cem>Who would fall for such an evil piece of you-know-what?\u003c/em> Then she remembers Elizabeth exists. A mere moment later, Elizabeth accepts Malfoy's proposal. I'm sorry, but how did she get from \u003cem>Aw, some poor people died\u003c/em> to \u003cem>I think I'll serve a rosemary-rubbed salmon at the reception \u003c/em>so quickly?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Agatha makes all these faces at Elizabeth:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/4be5d4f99504117ad25ec45bacfd83d9.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47433\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/4be5d4f99504117ad25ec45bacfd83d9.gif\" alt=\"4be5d4f99504117ad25ec45bacfd83d9\" width=\"396\" height=\"223\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Ross receives a letter from Elizabeth about her engagement. It's a mix of \u003cem>sorry not sorry\u003c/em> sentiments and groan-worthy lines like this: \"I seem to need the strength and protection only a man can give.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross' reaction in a nutshell:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/J7Z9OIe.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47434\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/J7Z9OIe.gif\" alt=\"j7z9oie\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He decides he must rush over there and make her change her mind. Demelza tries to stop him, but he makes her back down by doing this right in her face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/0Jxxb.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47436\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/0Jxxb.gif\" alt=\"0jxxb\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When he gets to Elizabeth's house, he starts barking and banging on the door and then literally kicks it down because he's a monster and that's the kind of thing monsters do. He marches upstairs and barges in her room. A lot of whining and yelling ensues, and all of it boils down to sexist ideas like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-32.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47435\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-32.gif\" alt=\"giphy-32\" width=\"500\" height=\"295\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elizabeth eventually stands up for herself and tells him that she won't be instructed and that he should get the F out of her house. He responds by respecting her wishes and apologizing for his brutish behavior.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Actually, no. That's what should have happened. Instead we get this: The \"hero\" of this show forces himself on her. She tells him to stop. He doesn't listen. He grabs her and is about to throw her onto the bed and have his way with her like a Neanderthal.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> You wouldn't dare!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross the Rapist:\u003c/strong> Oh, I would!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He throws her on the bed and jumps on top of her. After some horizontal struggling, we're supposed to believe that Elizabeth starts to enjoy herself.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_maojs7DBEh1rzbvsto1_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47437\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_maojs7DBEh1rzbvsto1_250.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_maojs7dbeh1rzbvsto1_250\" width=\"148\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next morning, Ross finally comes home. Demelza is outside waiting for a good explanation. She gets this really subpar one:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"What can I say? It was something I cannot explain. You must see I had no choice.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Is he serious?!?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza, finish him, \u003cem>Mortal Kombat\u003c/em> style!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/mileena2-1428950136.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47438\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/mileena2-1428950136.gif\" alt=\"mileena2-1428950136\" width=\"320\" height=\"224\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She doesn't quite gobble him up and spit out his bones, but she does punch him right in the eye.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/hermionepunch.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47439\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/hermionepunch.gif\" alt=\"hermionepunch\" width=\"330\" height=\"141\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I'll take it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, I usually reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, but this time, I only have pieces of coal to hand out.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>, the show.\u003c/strong> Way to contribute to the rape myth that, even when a woman says no, she secretly wants it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>ANOTHER PIECE OF COAL:\u003c/em> Aidan Turner, the actor who plays Ross.\u003c/strong> In an \u003ca href=\"https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/1543363/bbc-cuts-storyline-from-next-series-of-poldark-which-would-have-seen-married-hero-forcing-ex-elizabeth-into-bed/\" target=\"_blank\">interview\u003c/a> with \u003cem>The Sun\u003c/em> about the rape scene, he had this to say: “It seems consensual, and it just seems right.\" Wow.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>AND ANOTHER PIECE OF COAL:\u003c/em> Ross. \u003c/strong>For obvious reasons.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a> and read all the \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other recaps\u003c/a> below.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/19/poldark-season-1-premiere-recap-stayin-alive/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1 Premiere Recap: Stayin’ Alive\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Ross does something so horrible that you'll feel bad about all the time you've spent looking at shirtless pictures of him.",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In the \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Ross did everything in his power to get in trouble with the law again, Demelza did everything in her power to not stab him, and Murphy's Law did everything in its power to prevent Doc, Blondie and Horace the Pug from eloping and finding bliss. Will Ross be hanged, turning \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> into a show only about Demelza, Agatha, and all the cool animals? Will Demelza finally get an annulment and pursue a career as a pop star in the big city? Will Elizabeth take a much-needed break from being super-duper annoying? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After barely escaping arrest and death, Ross should be lying low right about now. He's not, of course. Instead, he's getting letters from his Illegal Smuggling Boss. Demelza has had it. Officially.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"Judas, Ross! Will you never learn?!?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"Possibly not.\" *smug smirk*\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Kill him, Demelza. Just kill him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Moments later, Ross is already in court. The judge is gleefully ready to punish him, but Ross brings in three surprise alibis. Case dismissed! Hmm, that was anti-climactic. Doc also gets off with a small fine for building that warning bonfire. Rich white dudes have all the luck. Remember when this same judge sentenced a poor person to several years in a typhus-infested prison for stealing a chicken and a different poor person to the gallows for throwing poop in Parliament Wannabe's face. Yeah.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside the courthouse, Doc pretends he's totally over Blondie:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/T55vZAITLI8'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/T55vZAITLI8'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>But on the inside, he's like:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/200.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-46932\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/200.gif\" alt=\"200\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at home, Ross apologizes to Demelza for all his really terrible decisions over the entire time they've known each other. \"I will never again be guilty of such recklessness.\" Ha ha ha... yeah, right.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/809dea98d6ba5bde1e3300dcb0191eb4.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-46933\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/809dea98d6ba5bde1e3300dcb0191eb4.gif\" alt=\"whitney houston laugh not amused gif\" width=\"235\" height=\"183\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Doc gets a bunch of mail. Blondie has returned all his letters and written one of her own, which basically reads like the lyrics to \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ggWyUEuGcWY\">JoJo's 2004 single \"Leave (Get Out)\"\u003c/a>:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>Get out! Leave! Right now!\u003cbr>\nIt's the end of you and me\u003cbr>\nYou said that you would treat me right\u003cbr>\nBut you was just a waste of time.\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>The next day, Demelza is in the town square, minding her business, when Elizabeth calls her over to her carriage.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \"I've been meaning to call upon you to thank you for your kindness these past few months.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"In lending you my husband?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> \"...in a manner of speaking.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Demelza:\u003c/strong> \"Oh, you're welcome to him, just so long as you remember where he belongs and send him back to me when you're done with him.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/1564jzc.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47349\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/1564jzc.gif\" alt=\"1564jzc\" width=\"360\" height=\"203\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Memo to everyone in Cornwall: Demelza is not the one to mess with.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, Demelza, still on the war path, confronts Ross about how he sold all his shares in the old mine, information she received from a stranger in town. Ross is like,\u003cem> Oh, yeah, I guess I forgot to tell you! I gave away almost all of our money to my ex-girlfriend, leading us to live in squalor for months and months, because she's a delicate flower and needs nice things more than you do. That's not going to be a problem, right?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza has two options:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Option A: Break a glass and use it to disembowel him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Option B: Silently stew.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She unfortunately chooses Option B.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/Kristen-Wiig-pissed.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-38909\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/Kristen-Wiig-pissed.gif\" alt=\"Kristen-Wiig-pissed\" width=\"343\" height=\"194\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Demelza grabs a bottle of brandy and runs to some random pregnant girl's house. Random Mom-To-Be is in labor and needs to get blackout drunk immediately (I don't blame her). She thankfully does not die from preeclampsia (still and forever traumatized by Sybil's fate in \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey/\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a>).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Her baby daddy comes home to meet his new child and brings good news from the mine: they found tin! That's cool and all, but this means my dream of the mine closing forever and never having to hear about it again has been dashed yet again. You can't always get what you want, I suppose.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Elizabeth's house, she's complaining (you don't say!) about how she doesn't have a man to do all the thinking for her anymore. Mid-rant, she notices a bunch of dudes (sent by Malfoy to scare her into marrying him) digging in her front yard for tin. Her mother comes to the window to take a look and randomly has a stroke.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And it's bad. She'll need constant care for the rest of her life. Elizabeth is really bummed she has to be a nurse now... unless Malfoy pays for one? She invites him over and he promptly proposes. WTF is going on? Doesn't anyone date around here? Elizabeth is unconvinced, until he reminds her how big his house is. She quickly changes her tune, while picturing her future of drowning in gold coins:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-30.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-47358 size-full\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-30.gif\" alt=\"giphy-30\" width=\"318\" height=\"244\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the mine, Ross thinks they should secure the ceiling with timbers before continuing to look for more tin. Everyone else is like, \u003cem>Naaaaah\u003c/em>. Someone's totally going to die.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the woods, Doc rides by the spot where he and Blondie made out next to a horse butt. He hums a melancholy melody that, two centuries later, will be adapted into a hit single titled \"My Heart Will Go On.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/xYwXYrK.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47450\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/xYwXYrK.gif\" alt=\"xywxyrk\" width=\"499\" height=\"269\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At chez Ross, Verity pays a visit and Demelza shares her worries that Ross is going to cheat on her with Elizabeth. Verity is like, \u003cem>Don't even worry about it! That would never happen!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dear Demelza, find more perceptive friends. Worry about it. It \u003cem>will\u003c/em> happen.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the library, Verity's obnoxiously cheerful stepson suggests that Doc join the Navy. Always full of bad ideas and terrible advice, Ross seconds the suggestion: \u003cem>Go for it! You might die, but who cares! \u003c/em>Broken-hearted Doc likes the idea of dying and plans to consider the idea.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The following day, Ross' War BFF and his overly-trimmed mustache show up again. Demelza is like, \u003cem>Um, last time you were here you held me at gunpoint and tried to arrest my husband.\u003c/em> He responds with Rod Stewart lyrics:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Have I told you lately that I love you?\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n\u003cem>Have I told you there's no one else above you?\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n\u003cem>Fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n\u003cem>Ease my troubles, that's what you do.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza is like, \u003cem>Um, cool. Thanks? \u003c/em>And then runs from the room.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/GIF.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47425\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/GIF.gif\" alt=\"gif\" width=\"500\" height=\"210\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at the mine, the ceiling caves in and two workers die, including Random New Mom's baby daddy. That's sad, but this revives my dream of the mine closing permanently and never having to hear about it again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/evil-smile.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47451\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/evil-smile.gif\" alt=\"evil-smile\" width=\"275\" height=\"251\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At Elizabeth's house, Malfoy comes over to gloat about Ross' dead workers. Agatha thinks, \u003cem>Who would fall for such an evil piece of you-know-what?\u003c/em> Then she remembers Elizabeth exists. A mere moment later, Elizabeth accepts Malfoy's proposal. I'm sorry, but how did she get from \u003cem>Aw, some poor people died\u003c/em> to \u003cem>I think I'll serve a rosemary-rubbed salmon at the reception \u003c/em>so quickly?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Agatha makes all these faces at Elizabeth:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/4be5d4f99504117ad25ec45bacfd83d9.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47433\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/4be5d4f99504117ad25ec45bacfd83d9.gif\" alt=\"4be5d4f99504117ad25ec45bacfd83d9\" width=\"396\" height=\"223\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Ross receives a letter from Elizabeth about her engagement. It's a mix of \u003cem>sorry not sorry\u003c/em> sentiments and groan-worthy lines like this: \"I seem to need the strength and protection only a man can give.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross' reaction in a nutshell:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/J7Z9OIe.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47434\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/J7Z9OIe.gif\" alt=\"j7z9oie\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He decides he must rush over there and make her change her mind. Demelza tries to stop him, but he makes her back down by doing this right in her face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/0Jxxb.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47436\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/0Jxxb.gif\" alt=\"0jxxb\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When he gets to Elizabeth's house, he starts barking and banging on the door and then literally kicks it down because he's a monster and that's the kind of thing monsters do. He marches upstairs and barges in her room. A lot of whining and yelling ensues, and all of it boils down to sexist ideas like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-32.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47435\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-32.gif\" alt=\"giphy-32\" width=\"500\" height=\"295\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elizabeth eventually stands up for herself and tells him that she won't be instructed and that he should get the F out of her house. He responds by respecting her wishes and apologizing for his brutish behavior.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Actually, no. That's what should have happened. Instead we get this: The \"hero\" of this show forces himself on her. She tells him to stop. He doesn't listen. He grabs her and is about to throw her onto the bed and have his way with her like a Neanderthal.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Elizabeth:\u003c/strong> You wouldn't dare!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross the Rapist:\u003c/strong> Oh, I would!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He throws her on the bed and jumps on top of her. After some horizontal struggling, we're supposed to believe that Elizabeth starts to enjoy herself.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_maojs7DBEh1rzbvsto1_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47437\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_maojs7DBEh1rzbvsto1_250.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_maojs7dbeh1rzbvsto1_250\" width=\"148\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next morning, Ross finally comes home. Demelza is outside waiting for a good explanation. She gets this really subpar one:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"What can I say? It was something I cannot explain. You must see I had no choice.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Is he serious?!?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza, finish him, \u003cem>Mortal Kombat\u003c/em> style!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/mileena2-1428950136.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47438\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/mileena2-1428950136.gif\" alt=\"mileena2-1428950136\" width=\"320\" height=\"224\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She doesn't quite gobble him up and spit out his bones, but she does punch him right in the eye.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/hermionepunch.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-47439\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/hermionepunch.gif\" alt=\"hermionepunch\" width=\"330\" height=\"141\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I'll take it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, I usually reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, but this time, I only have pieces of coal to hand out.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>, the show.\u003c/strong> Way to contribute to the rape myth that, even when a woman says no, she secretly wants it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>ANOTHER PIECE OF COAL:\u003c/em> Aidan Turner, the actor who plays Ross.\u003c/strong> In an \u003ca href=\"https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/1543363/bbc-cuts-storyline-from-next-series-of-poldark-which-would-have-seen-married-hero-forcing-ex-elizabeth-into-bed/\" target=\"_blank\">interview\u003c/a> with \u003cem>The Sun\u003c/em> about the rape scene, he had this to say: “It seems consensual, and it just seems right.\" Wow.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>AND ANOTHER PIECE OF COAL:\u003c/em> Ross. \u003c/strong>For obvious reasons.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a> and read all the \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other recaps\u003c/a> below.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/11/06/poldark-season-2-episode-6-recap-informer/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/19/poldark-season-1-premiere-recap-stayin-alive/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1 Premiere Recap: Stayin’ Alive\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer",
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"content": "\u003cp>In the \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Ross tried really hard not to cheat on Demelza, Demelza tried really hard not to kill Ross, and Blondie and Doc made out next to a horse butt again. Will Ross and Pinky Ring just get the adultery over with already? Will Demelza respond by pulling a Lorena Bobbitt? Will Agatha loudly proclaim her undying devotion to alcohol again? Will Horace the Pug get lost and embark on a \u003cem>Homeward Bound\u003c/em>-esque journey with Demelza's pup and Malfoy's uncle's pooch? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Breaking news alert! The French chopped off Marie Antoinette's husband's head! Everyone in Cornwall is freaking out over the overseas drama, but Ross' War BFF (the dude who is constantly in uniform) will not let some pesky revolution distract him from jailing all the illegal traders -- with the help of the secret informer. Is it just me, or do you also hear this song every time someone on this show says that word?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B0yGvypBwyA\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh. Just me? Cool.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At chez Ross, Demelza is sawing wood and imagining that she's sawing into Ross and Pinky Ring's faces. Her voodoo wood-mutilation is cut short by two approaching men. Demelza orders Garrick the Dog (OMG, he's alive!) to attack them. The men are like, \u003cem>Woah, woah! It's us! Ross' illegal trading buddies!\u003c/em> Demelza is like, \u003cem>I know. That's why I'm trying to give you rabies.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of Garrick, did you know that the real-life dog that plays him was abandoned, rescued, and now, in addition to starring in \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>, has been cast in the upcoming \u003cem>Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them\u003c/em> \u003cem>and\u003c/em> Emma Watson's live-action version of \u003cem>Beauty and the Beast\u003c/em>? \u003ca href=\"https://www.thesun.co.uk/archives/tv/1123229/the-dog-thats-having-its-day-rescue-animal-becomes-tvs-most-in-demand-mutt-after-starring-in-poldark/\">It's true\u003c/a>! Now I need to know the real-life details of Horace the Pug and Malfoy's uncle's dog. These three are quickly becoming my favorite part of this show.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyway, let's move beyond canines (for now) and see what Ross is up to. Oh, the same thing as every other episode: sucking at mining. I've said it before and I'll say it again: Ross needs to cut his losses and convert his mine into a a spot for hipsters to buy overpriced avocado toast and fresh-pressed juices. He'll never have to worry about money again!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at home, Demelza continues to yell at the illegal traders to get their crap from under the floorboards and:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_n0bbjpmUtQ1s7hg3xo1_400.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45886\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_n0bbjpmUtQ1s7hg3xo1_400.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_n0bbjpmutq1s7hg3xo1_400\" width=\"350\" height=\"279\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let's check back in with Ross. Has he returned home to handle his own illegal business dealings and to spend some quality time with his wife and infant? Ha ha, nope! He's at Pinky Ring's, of course, inching closer and closer to adultery.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"I will always have reason to call, if you wish it.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Pinky Ring:\u003c/strong> \"I wish it.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/alAx0zM.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-45888\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/alAx0zM.gif\" alt=\"alax0zm\" width=\"500\" height=\"202\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at chez Ross, Demelza is still giving grade-A death stare.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-45889\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-800x436.png\" alt=\"screen-shot-2016-11-05-at-10-51-06-am\" width=\"800\" height=\"436\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-800x436.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-160x87.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-768x419.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-1020x556.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-1180x644.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-960x524.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-240x131.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-375x205.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-520x284.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM.png 1232w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It only increases in intensity when Ross shares his plan to not only store smuggled goods, but to personally go on one of the smuggling runs. But maybe this is a good thing. Ross can get his stupid ass caught and go to prison, paving the way for \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> to become all about Demelza and the three dogs. Now \u003cem>that\u003c/em> would be must-see TV!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Doc and Blondie debate whether they should elope or try to convince Blondie's uncle to be chill and just let them get married the non-shady way. I don't care either way, as long as I get a shot of Horace the Pug serving as the ring-bearer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>More details about the smuggling run: Ross is going all the way to France (I guess ticket prices dropped, thanks to all the social unrest and beheadings and such). His mission will be to find that dude from Season 1 who strangled his cheating wife to death and ask his advice on which part of the mine might actually have copper. This storyline is embarrassing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In town, Malfoy runs into Ross. Despite my immense desire for one of them to slap the other with a glove, they just mean mug each other and walk away.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Malfoy returns home and orders his Slytherin Crony to go to Pinky Ring's house at once. He's supposed to scare her with details of the French Revolution so that she comes running for Malfoy's help, but it doesn't quite work out that way. She instead writes to Ross because home-wreckers gonna home-wreck.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Agatha, on the other hand, doesn't need a man for protection.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Agatha:\u003c/strong> \"Fetch me a pistol. I can stop an intruder in his tracks.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Pinky Ring:\u003c/strong> \"I don't doubt it, aunt. With or without a firearm.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_odagiuxFeT1smwl44o2_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45900\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_odagiuxFeT1smwl44o2_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_odagiuxfet1smwl44o2_500\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at chez Ross, Doc stops by to tell Demelza he's skipping town to marry Blondie and won't be coming back. Demelza plays it cool, but this will be her at the going-away party, because a) she loves to sing and b) Doc is one of the only nice people in all of Cornwall:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/11c839f0-d25f-0132-45f5-0ebc4eccb42f.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45902\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/11c839f0-d25f-0132-45f5-0ebc4eccb42f.gif\" alt=\"11c839f0-d25f-0132-45f5-0ebc4eccb42f\" width=\"500\" height=\"244\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Pinky Ring is livid at Ross for not responding to her letter. You can't see me, but I'm pointing and laughing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tenor.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45910\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tenor.gif\" alt=\"tenor\" width=\"390\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Blondie pays Demelza a visit. Her need for girl talk supersedes her hatred of poor people, just this once. Blondie is worried Doc has changed his mind about the elopement. Demelza is like, \u003cem>No way!\u003c/em> But Blondie hits her with a \u003cem>Girl, who are you kidding? \u003c/em>question:\u003cem> \u003c/em>\"Is that your experience of husbands, to be relied upon?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza's response:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/kid-crying-interview.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45913\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/kid-crying-interview.gif\" alt=\"kid-crying-interview\" width=\"360\" height=\"189\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In France, Ross meets up with Wife Strangler, who now looks like \u003ca href=\"https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/6c/f3/74/6cf374f1222add3feba608e8e4347650.jpg\">Tom Hanks in \u003cem>Castaway\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or \u003ca href=\"https://media.giphy.com/media/JjLylCKqqQs5q/giphy.gif\">Tom Hanks in \u003cem>Forrest Gump\u003c/em>\u003c/a>. You decide. He shares how much he wishes he could strangle Doc to death for sleeping with his wife. I'm guessing France doesn't offer anger-management classes?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross and friends are all like, \u003cem>Dude, you've done enough strangling. Now, where's the copper?\u003c/em> Wife Strangler tries to show them on a map and they all look at each other like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Kim-Kardashian-looking-at-Kanye-West-shaking-their-heads-GIF.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45914\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Kim-Kardashian-looking-at-Kanye-West-shaking-their-heads-GIF.gif\" alt=\"kim-kardashian-looking-at-kanye-west-shaking-their-heads-gif\" width=\"460\" height=\"262\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He doesn't really know where the copper is, after all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in Cornwall, Malfoy sends his Slytherin Crony to scare Pinky Ring some more by lying about poor people planning to storm her property. Agatha swoops in with some words of wisdom: \"Male of the species: inadequate at best. Better to rely on one's own resources.\" And then she PULLS OUT A HUGE GUN!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_odagiuxFeT1smwl44o3_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45937\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_odagiuxFeT1smwl44o3_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_odagiuxfet1smwl44o3_500\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>News of this fake riot-in-the-making makes Pinky Ring even angrier with Ross. How dare he not reply to her letter?! She's his.... ex-girlfriend who ditched him for his richer cousin, while he was fighting for his life on the front lines. Yeah. You reap what you sow, girlfriend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alas, she doesn't have any common sense and trots on over to chez Ross to bug Demelza. \u003cem>Why hasn't your husband replied to my love note? Wahhhh!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza considers this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-25.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45938\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-25.gif\" alt=\"giphy-25\" width=\"500\" height=\"262\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But opts for this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/raw-10.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45939\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/raw-10.gif\" alt=\"shooting daggers eyes gif\" width=\"400\" height=\"280\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In town, Wonky Knee Girl, who Doc cured last episode using the knowledge he acquired by inappropriately cutting off a corpse's leg, is having trouble walking again. Doc gets word and wants to help, but he's supposed to meet Blondie in the woods for their elopement. Because he's a good person and doesn't want the other town doctor to chop off this girl's entire leg, he runs to help, which means he's essentially stranding Blondie at the altar because this was before texting. I guess we'll never get to see Horace the Pug serve as ring-bearer, after all.\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/dog-anim.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-45971 size-full\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/dog-anim.gif\" alt=\"dog-anim\" width=\"800\" height=\"600\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Doc easily turns Wonky Knee Girl into Functional Knee Girl. Ok, great! Now he doesn't have to be late for his elopement.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Not so fast! Functional Knee Girl's fiancé, who also happens to be the dude who barged into Ross' house last episode and saw all the smugglers digging a hole in the living room floor, is revealed to have lied about a thing or two. Doc and Demelza look at each other, this song now stuck in their heads:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B0yGvypBwyA\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Horace the Pug is growing very impatient. Blondie, too, I suppose.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-45947\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-800x402.jpg\" alt=\"horace-pug-poldark\" width=\"800\" height=\"402\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-800x402.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-160x80.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-768x386.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-1020x512.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-1180x593.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-960x482.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-240x121.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-375x188.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-520x261.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark.jpg 1226w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Doc runs over to Informer's house. Homeboy does not have a fever, but he does have fancy curtains and candlesticks. You, too, can have nice housewares, if you sell out your friends for years.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza hurries home, seeing tons of military men on the way. She informs Mrs. Pigpen that she's going to head down to the beach to warn Ross. Only trouble is Ross' War BFF busts in right then and orders a man with a gun to not let her leave for the rest of the evening.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the Informer's house, Doc tries to leave to tell the others, but Informer breaks a chair on his back! When that doesn't kill him, Informer tries to bludgeon him with a fireplace poker. When that doesn't work, he tries to stab him to death. Thankfully, Doc lands a few blows and runs out. (Maybe he's been taking boxing lessons in heels like Malfoy?)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Side-note: I watched that entire fight like Aly Raisman's parents:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/PlayfulBeneficialGander-size_restricted.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45972\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/PlayfulBeneficialGander-size_restricted.gif\" alt=\"playfulbeneficialgander-size_restricted\" width=\"250\" height=\"141\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>From there, Doc goes to a hill overlooking the beach and makes a bonfire to warn foolhardy Ross and his stupid friends. Unfortunately, they're already on the beach, unloading, by the time they notice it. Ross yells for everyone to get back in the boat, but he wants to take his chances running around on the beach while soldiers shoot at him, proving that he got everything in the looks department and almost nothing in the brains department.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross runs up the hill and knocks out some soldiers. This plan is really stupid. A single punch isn't strong enough to give them early-onset Alzheimer's. They will remember who knocked them out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of being knocked out, a soldier hits Doc on the head with his rifle. No good deed goes unpunished, which is something Blondie knows very well, as she and Horace are sitting in her coach in the rain and cold, waiting for someone who isn't coming. Horace is TREMBLING! All because of Ross and his constant shenanigans.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza manages to sneak out of the house (because she's got it like that) and finds Ross in the woods. Guards are everywhere. The plan is to run home and have Ross hide in the library, where the secret cellar is. Pretty sure Informer told them about that secret spot, but okay.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The very moment Demelza walks back into the house, one of the dudes that Ross knocked out barges in. Like I expected, he did not develop early-onset Alzheimer's. A bunch of soldiers storm the library, point their guns at the secret cellar and...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-26.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-45974\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-26.gif\" alt=\"giphy-26\" width=\"440\" height=\"330\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...it's empty!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Phew!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-27.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-45973\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-27.gif\" alt=\"giphy-27\" width=\"500\" height=\"395\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Pinky Ring hears about the soldiers running around and once again loudly complains about Ross not writing her back. GET OVER YOUR FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS!!! Being the petty middle schooler that she is, she immediately writes Malfoy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, after some time in custody, Doc is released. He runs to Blondie's mansion, but all that's there for him is a letter from her saying goodbye forever. THANKS, ROSS!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Here's a live feed of Blondie:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/JmW19.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45975\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/JmW19.gif\" alt=\"jmw19\" width=\"500\" height=\"256\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mr. Pigpen and some other smugglers are on the hunt for the Informer. They're out for blood. But they're not going to get any because -- plot twist! -- the Informer has already been murdered and dumped on the beach. That's what he gets for being the main reason Horace the Pug had to tremble in the cold all night long.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At Pinky Ring's house, Malfoy stops by to tattle on Ross. Agatha calls BS on everything he says, with punctuations of \"Stuff!\" and \"Piffle!\" I'm so glad she's immortal and will never die.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at chez Ross, Demelza is worried sick. The rug and table in the library moved, so Ross has definitely been there. Where in the world is Ross Poldark (and \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ImLfvgPJd8\">Carmen Sandiego\u003c/a>)?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Apparently, in a side compartment of the secret cellar! He emerges and walks in on Demelza singing her first single. She runs to him and they embrace. All is well... until he has to deal with the fact that he punched a bunch of soldiers and has been exposed as an illegal smuggler. But other than that, and the fact that he's in love with another woman, it's all good.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> Pinky Ring.\u003c/strong> Sometimes, people don't reply to letters, emails or texts because they are busy and their lives don't revolve around you. GET OVER YOURSELF.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> \u003cstrong>Demelza\u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>\u003cstrong>. \u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>Let her life be a lesson: think twice before marrying a dude just because he's easy on the eyes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em> \u003cstrong>Blondie.\u003c/strong>\u003cem> \u003c/em>Being stood up in the cold like that is terrible, but there's a silver lining. Now, she can release really powerful breakup anthems and become the 18th-century Taylor Swift!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>SILVER: \u003c/em>\u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>Agatha. \u003c/strong>That gun reveal. Pure gold.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>GOLD:\u003c/em> Doc. \u003c/strong>I'm glad he survived being assaulted by a chair, a poker, a knife, a rifle butt, \u003cem>and\u003c/em> a breakup letter. He's earned a lengthy vacation. Wonky Knee Girl will just have to fend for herself.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a> or read all the \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other recaps\u003c/a> below!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/19/poldark-season-1-premiere-recap-stayin-alive/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1 Premiere Recap: Stayin’ Alive\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Remember when Judas betrayed Jesus and all hell broke loose? This episode is kind of like that.",
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"description": "Remember when Judas betrayed Jesus and all hell broke loose? This episode is kind of like that.",
"title": "'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 6 Recap: Informer | KQED",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In the \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">previous episode of \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Ross tried really hard not to cheat on Demelza, Demelza tried really hard not to kill Ross, and Blondie and Doc made out next to a horse butt again. Will Ross and Pinky Ring just get the adultery over with already? Will Demelza respond by pulling a Lorena Bobbitt? Will Agatha loudly proclaim her undying devotion to alcohol again? Will Horace the Pug get lost and embark on a \u003cem>Homeward Bound\u003c/em>-esque journey with Demelza's pup and Malfoy's uncle's pooch? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Breaking news alert! The French chopped off Marie Antoinette's husband's head! Everyone in Cornwall is freaking out over the overseas drama, but Ross' War BFF (the dude who is constantly in uniform) will not let some pesky revolution distract him from jailing all the illegal traders -- with the help of the secret informer. Is it just me, or do you also hear this song every time someone on this show says that word?\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/B0yGvypBwyA'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/B0yGvypBwyA'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Oh. Just me? Cool.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At chez Ross, Demelza is sawing wood and imagining that she's sawing into Ross and Pinky Ring's faces. Her voodoo wood-mutilation is cut short by two approaching men. Demelza orders Garrick the Dog (OMG, he's alive!) to attack them. The men are like, \u003cem>Woah, woah! It's us! Ross' illegal trading buddies!\u003c/em> Demelza is like, \u003cem>I know. That's why I'm trying to give you rabies.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of Garrick, did you know that the real-life dog that plays him was abandoned, rescued, and now, in addition to starring in \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>, has been cast in the upcoming \u003cem>Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them\u003c/em> \u003cem>and\u003c/em> Emma Watson's live-action version of \u003cem>Beauty and the Beast\u003c/em>? \u003ca href=\"https://www.thesun.co.uk/archives/tv/1123229/the-dog-thats-having-its-day-rescue-animal-becomes-tvs-most-in-demand-mutt-after-starring-in-poldark/\">It's true\u003c/a>! Now I need to know the real-life details of Horace the Pug and Malfoy's uncle's dog. These three are quickly becoming my favorite part of this show.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyway, let's move beyond canines (for now) and see what Ross is up to. Oh, the same thing as every other episode: sucking at mining. I've said it before and I'll say it again: Ross needs to cut his losses and convert his mine into a a spot for hipsters to buy overpriced avocado toast and fresh-pressed juices. He'll never have to worry about money again!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at home, Demelza continues to yell at the illegal traders to get their crap from under the floorboards and:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_n0bbjpmUtQ1s7hg3xo1_400.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45886\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_n0bbjpmUtQ1s7hg3xo1_400.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_n0bbjpmutq1s7hg3xo1_400\" width=\"350\" height=\"279\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let's check back in with Ross. Has he returned home to handle his own illegal business dealings and to spend some quality time with his wife and infant? Ha ha, nope! He's at Pinky Ring's, of course, inching closer and closer to adultery.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Ross:\u003c/strong> \"I will always have reason to call, if you wish it.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Pinky Ring:\u003c/strong> \"I wish it.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/alAx0zM.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-45888\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/alAx0zM.gif\" alt=\"alax0zm\" width=\"500\" height=\"202\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at chez Ross, Demelza is still giving grade-A death stare.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-45889\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-800x436.png\" alt=\"screen-shot-2016-11-05-at-10-51-06-am\" width=\"800\" height=\"436\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-800x436.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-160x87.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-768x419.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-1020x556.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-1180x644.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-960x524.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-240x131.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-375x205.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM-520x284.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Screen-Shot-2016-11-05-at-10.51.06-AM.png 1232w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It only increases in intensity when Ross shares his plan to not only store smuggled goods, but to personally go on one of the smuggling runs. But maybe this is a good thing. Ross can get his stupid ass caught and go to prison, paving the way for \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em> to become all about Demelza and the three dogs. Now \u003cem>that\u003c/em> would be must-see TV!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Doc and Blondie debate whether they should elope or try to convince Blondie's uncle to be chill and just let them get married the non-shady way. I don't care either way, as long as I get a shot of Horace the Pug serving as the ring-bearer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>More details about the smuggling run: Ross is going all the way to France (I guess ticket prices dropped, thanks to all the social unrest and beheadings and such). His mission will be to find that dude from Season 1 who strangled his cheating wife to death and ask his advice on which part of the mine might actually have copper. This storyline is embarrassing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In town, Malfoy runs into Ross. Despite my immense desire for one of them to slap the other with a glove, they just mean mug each other and walk away.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Malfoy returns home and orders his Slytherin Crony to go to Pinky Ring's house at once. He's supposed to scare her with details of the French Revolution so that she comes running for Malfoy's help, but it doesn't quite work out that way. She instead writes to Ross because home-wreckers gonna home-wreck.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Agatha, on the other hand, doesn't need a man for protection.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Agatha:\u003c/strong> \"Fetch me a pistol. I can stop an intruder in his tracks.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Pinky Ring:\u003c/strong> \"I don't doubt it, aunt. With or without a firearm.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_odagiuxFeT1smwl44o2_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45900\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_odagiuxFeT1smwl44o2_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_odagiuxfet1smwl44o2_500\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at chez Ross, Doc stops by to tell Demelza he's skipping town to marry Blondie and won't be coming back. Demelza plays it cool, but this will be her at the going-away party, because a) she loves to sing and b) Doc is one of the only nice people in all of Cornwall:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/11c839f0-d25f-0132-45f5-0ebc4eccb42f.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45902\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/11c839f0-d25f-0132-45f5-0ebc4eccb42f.gif\" alt=\"11c839f0-d25f-0132-45f5-0ebc4eccb42f\" width=\"500\" height=\"244\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Pinky Ring is livid at Ross for not responding to her letter. You can't see me, but I'm pointing and laughing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tenor.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45910\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tenor.gif\" alt=\"tenor\" width=\"390\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Blondie pays Demelza a visit. Her need for girl talk supersedes her hatred of poor people, just this once. Blondie is worried Doc has changed his mind about the elopement. Demelza is like, \u003cem>No way!\u003c/em> But Blondie hits her with a \u003cem>Girl, who are you kidding? \u003c/em>question:\u003cem> \u003c/em>\"Is that your experience of husbands, to be relied upon?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza's response:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/kid-crying-interview.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45913\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/kid-crying-interview.gif\" alt=\"kid-crying-interview\" width=\"360\" height=\"189\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In France, Ross meets up with Wife Strangler, who now looks like \u003ca href=\"https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/6c/f3/74/6cf374f1222add3feba608e8e4347650.jpg\">Tom Hanks in \u003cem>Castaway\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or \u003ca href=\"https://media.giphy.com/media/JjLylCKqqQs5q/giphy.gif\">Tom Hanks in \u003cem>Forrest Gump\u003c/em>\u003c/a>. You decide. He shares how much he wishes he could strangle Doc to death for sleeping with his wife. I'm guessing France doesn't offer anger-management classes?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross and friends are all like, \u003cem>Dude, you've done enough strangling. Now, where's the copper?\u003c/em> Wife Strangler tries to show them on a map and they all look at each other like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Kim-Kardashian-looking-at-Kanye-West-shaking-their-heads-GIF.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45914\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/Kim-Kardashian-looking-at-Kanye-West-shaking-their-heads-GIF.gif\" alt=\"kim-kardashian-looking-at-kanye-west-shaking-their-heads-gif\" width=\"460\" height=\"262\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He doesn't really know where the copper is, after all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in Cornwall, Malfoy sends his Slytherin Crony to scare Pinky Ring some more by lying about poor people planning to storm her property. Agatha swoops in with some words of wisdom: \"Male of the species: inadequate at best. Better to rely on one's own resources.\" And then she PULLS OUT A HUGE GUN!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_odagiuxFeT1smwl44o3_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45937\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_odagiuxFeT1smwl44o3_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_odagiuxfet1smwl44o3_500\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>News of this fake riot-in-the-making makes Pinky Ring even angrier with Ross. How dare he not reply to her letter?! She's his.... ex-girlfriend who ditched him for his richer cousin, while he was fighting for his life on the front lines. Yeah. You reap what you sow, girlfriend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alas, she doesn't have any common sense and trots on over to chez Ross to bug Demelza. \u003cem>Why hasn't your husband replied to my love note? Wahhhh!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza considers this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-25.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45938\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-25.gif\" alt=\"giphy-25\" width=\"500\" height=\"262\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But opts for this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/raw-10.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45939\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/raw-10.gif\" alt=\"shooting daggers eyes gif\" width=\"400\" height=\"280\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In town, Wonky Knee Girl, who Doc cured last episode using the knowledge he acquired by inappropriately cutting off a corpse's leg, is having trouble walking again. Doc gets word and wants to help, but he's supposed to meet Blondie in the woods for their elopement. Because he's a good person and doesn't want the other town doctor to chop off this girl's entire leg, he runs to help, which means he's essentially stranding Blondie at the altar because this was before texting. I guess we'll never get to see Horace the Pug serve as ring-bearer, after all.\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/dog-anim.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-45971 size-full\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/dog-anim.gif\" alt=\"dog-anim\" width=\"800\" height=\"600\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Doc easily turns Wonky Knee Girl into Functional Knee Girl. Ok, great! Now he doesn't have to be late for his elopement.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Not so fast! Functional Knee Girl's fiancé, who also happens to be the dude who barged into Ross' house last episode and saw all the smugglers digging a hole in the living room floor, is revealed to have lied about a thing or two. Doc and Demelza look at each other, this song now stuck in their heads:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/B0yGvypBwyA'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/B0yGvypBwyA'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Meanwhile, Horace the Pug is growing very impatient. Blondie, too, I suppose.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-45947\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-800x402.jpg\" alt=\"horace-pug-poldark\" width=\"800\" height=\"402\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-800x402.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-160x80.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-768x386.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-1020x512.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-1180x593.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-960x482.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-240x121.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-375x188.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark-520x261.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/horace-pug-poldark.jpg 1226w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Doc runs over to Informer's house. Homeboy does not have a fever, but he does have fancy curtains and candlesticks. You, too, can have nice housewares, if you sell out your friends for years.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza hurries home, seeing tons of military men on the way. She informs Mrs. Pigpen that she's going to head down to the beach to warn Ross. Only trouble is Ross' War BFF busts in right then and orders a man with a gun to not let her leave for the rest of the evening.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the Informer's house, Doc tries to leave to tell the others, but Informer breaks a chair on his back! When that doesn't kill him, Informer tries to bludgeon him with a fireplace poker. When that doesn't work, he tries to stab him to death. Thankfully, Doc lands a few blows and runs out. (Maybe he's been taking boxing lessons in heels like Malfoy?)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Side-note: I watched that entire fight like Aly Raisman's parents:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/PlayfulBeneficialGander-size_restricted.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45972\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/PlayfulBeneficialGander-size_restricted.gif\" alt=\"playfulbeneficialgander-size_restricted\" width=\"250\" height=\"141\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>From there, Doc goes to a hill overlooking the beach and makes a bonfire to warn foolhardy Ross and his stupid friends. Unfortunately, they're already on the beach, unloading, by the time they notice it. Ross yells for everyone to get back in the boat, but he wants to take his chances running around on the beach while soldiers shoot at him, proving that he got everything in the looks department and almost nothing in the brains department.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ross runs up the hill and knocks out some soldiers. This plan is really stupid. A single punch isn't strong enough to give them early-onset Alzheimer's. They will remember who knocked them out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of being knocked out, a soldier hits Doc on the head with his rifle. No good deed goes unpunished, which is something Blondie knows very well, as she and Horace are sitting in her coach in the rain and cold, waiting for someone who isn't coming. Horace is TREMBLING! All because of Ross and his constant shenanigans.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Demelza manages to sneak out of the house (because she's got it like that) and finds Ross in the woods. Guards are everywhere. The plan is to run home and have Ross hide in the library, where the secret cellar is. Pretty sure Informer told them about that secret spot, but okay.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The very moment Demelza walks back into the house, one of the dudes that Ross knocked out barges in. Like I expected, he did not develop early-onset Alzheimer's. A bunch of soldiers storm the library, point their guns at the secret cellar and...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-26.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-45974\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-26.gif\" alt=\"giphy-26\" width=\"440\" height=\"330\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...it's empty!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Phew!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-27.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-45973\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/giphy-27.gif\" alt=\"giphy-27\" width=\"500\" height=\"395\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Pinky Ring hears about the soldiers running around and once again loudly complains about Ross not writing her back. GET OVER YOUR FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS!!! Being the petty middle schooler that she is, she immediately writes Malfoy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, after some time in custody, Doc is released. He runs to Blondie's mansion, but all that's there for him is a letter from her saying goodbye forever. THANKS, ROSS!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Here's a live feed of Blondie:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/JmW19.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-45975\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/JmW19.gif\" alt=\"jmw19\" width=\"500\" height=\"256\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mr. Pigpen and some other smugglers are on the hunt for the Informer. They're out for blood. But they're not going to get any because -- plot twist! -- the Informer has already been murdered and dumped on the beach. That's what he gets for being the main reason Horace the Pug had to tremble in the cold all night long.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At Pinky Ring's house, Malfoy stops by to tattle on Ross. Agatha calls BS on everything he says, with punctuations of \"Stuff!\" and \"Piffle!\" I'm so glad she's immortal and will never die.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at chez Ross, Demelza is worried sick. The rug and table in the library moved, so Ross has definitely been there. Where in the world is Ross Poldark (and \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ImLfvgPJd8\">Carmen Sandiego\u003c/a>)?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Apparently, in a side compartment of the secret cellar! He emerges and walks in on Demelza singing her first single. She runs to him and they embrace. All is well... until he has to deal with the fact that he punched a bunch of soldiers and has been exposed as an illegal smuggler. But other than that, and the fact that he's in love with another woman, it's all good.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> Pinky Ring.\u003c/strong> Sometimes, people don't reply to letters, emails or texts because they are busy and their lives don't revolve around you. GET OVER YOURSELF.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> \u003cstrong>Demelza\u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>\u003cstrong>. \u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>Let her life be a lesson: think twice before marrying a dude just because he's easy on the eyes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em> \u003cstrong>Blondie.\u003c/strong>\u003cem> \u003c/em>Being stood up in the cold like that is terrible, but there's a silver lining. Now, she can release really powerful breakup anthems and become the 18th-century Taylor Swift!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>SILVER: \u003c/em>\u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>Agatha. \u003c/strong>That gun reveal. Pure gold.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>GOLD:\u003c/em> Doc. \u003c/strong>I'm glad he survived being assaulted by a chair, a poker, a knife, a rifle butt, \u003cem>and\u003c/em> a breakup letter. He's earned a lengthy vacation. Wonky Knee Girl will just have to fend for herself.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a> or read all the \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps/\">other recaps\u003c/a> below!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/30/poldark-season-2-episode-5-recap-before-he-cheats/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 5 Recap: Before He Cheats\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/24/poldark-season-2-episode-4-recap-sink-or-swim/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 4 Recap: Sink or Swim\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/17/poldark-season-2-episode-3-recap-miss-independent/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap: Miss Independent\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/10/02/poldark-season-2-episode-2-recap-you-dont-bring-me-flowers/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 2 Recap: You Don't Bring Me Flowers\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/27/poldark-season-2-premiere-recap-court-and-spark/\">'Poldark' Season 2, Episode 1 Recap: Court and Spark\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/23/poldark-season-1-episode-4-recap-send-my-love-to-your-new-lover/\"> 'Poldark' Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Send My Love to Your New Lover\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/21/poldark-season-1-episode-3-recap-oops-there-goes-my-shirt/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: Oops, There Goes My Shirt\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/poldark-season-1-episode-2-recap-guns-and-ships-bang-bang/\">‘Poldark’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: Bang Bang\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"info": "What kind of no sabo word is Hyphenación? For us, it’s about living within a hyphenation. Like being a third-gen Mexican-American from the Texas border now living that Bay Area Chicano life. Like Xorje! Each week we bring together a couple of hyphenated Latinos to talk all about personal life choices: family, careers, relationships, belonging … everything is on the table. ",
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"info": "The Political Mind of Jerry Brown brings listeners the wisdom of the former Governor, Mayor, and presidential candidate. Scott Shafer interviewed Brown for more than 40 hours, covering the former governor's life and half-century in the political game – and Brown has some lessons he'd like to share. ",
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"marketplace": {
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"info": "Our flagship program, helmed by Kai Ryssdal, examines what the day in money delivered, through stories, conversations, newsworthy numbers and more. Updated Monday through Friday at about 3:30 p.m. PT.",
"airtime": "MON-FRI 4pm-4:30pm, MON-WED 6:30pm-7pm",
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"masters-of-scale": {
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"airtime": "Every other Wednesday June 12 through October 16 at 8pm (repeats Thursdays at 2am)",
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},
"mindshift": {
"id": "mindshift",
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"info": "The MindShift podcast explores the innovations in education that are shaping how kids learn. Hosts Ki Sung and Katrina Schwartz introduce listeners to educators, researchers, parents and students who are developing effective ways to improve how kids learn. We cover topics like how fed-up administrators are developing surprising tactics to deal with classroom disruptions; how listening to podcasts are helping kids develop reading skills; the consequences of overparenting; and why interdisciplinary learning can engage students on all ends of the traditional achievement spectrum. This podcast is part of the MindShift education site, a division of KQED News. KQED is an NPR/PBS member station based in San Francisco. You can also visit the MindShift website for episodes and supplemental blog posts or tweet us \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/MindShiftKQED\">@MindShiftKQED\u003c/a> or visit us at \u003ca href=\"/mindshift\">MindShift.KQED.org\u003c/a>",
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"order": 12
},
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"google": "https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5tZWdhcGhvbmUuZm0vS1FJTkM1NzY0NjAwNDI5",
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"morning-edition": {
"id": "morning-edition",
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"info": "\u003cem>Morning Edition\u003c/em> takes listeners around the country and the world with multi-faceted stories and commentaries every weekday. Hosts Steve Inskeep, David Greene and Rachel Martin bring you the latest breaking news and features to prepare you for the day.",
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"onourwatch": {
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"title": "On Our Watch",
"tagline": "Deeply-reported investigative journalism",
"info": "For decades, the process for how police police themselves has been inconsistent – if not opaque. In some states, like California, these proceedings were completely hidden. After a new police transparency law unsealed scores of internal affairs files, our reporters set out to examine these cases and the shadow world of police discipline. On Our Watch brings listeners into the rooms where officers are questioned and witnesses are interrogated to find out who this system is really protecting. Is it the officers, or the public they've sworn to serve?",
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"order": 11
},
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"on-the-media": {
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"title": "On The Media",
"info": "Our weekly podcast explores how the media 'sausage' is made, casts an incisive eye on fluctuations in the marketplace of ideas, and examines threats to the freedom of information and expression in America and abroad. For one hour a week, the show tries to lift the veil from the process of \"making media,\" especially news media, because it's through that lens that we see the world and the world sees us",
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"link": "/radio/program/on-the-media",
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},
"pbs-newshour": {
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"tuneIn": "https://tunein.com/radio/PBS-NewsHour---Full-Show-p425698/",
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},
"perspectives": {
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"order": 14
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"planet-money": {
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"info": "The economy explained. Imagine you could call up a friend and say, Meet me at the bar and tell me what's going on with the economy. Now imagine that's actually a fun evening.",
"airtime": "SUN 3pm-4pm",
"imageSrc": "https://ww2.kqed.org/radio/wp-content/uploads/sites/50/2018/04/planetmoney.jpg",
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},
"link": "/radio/program/planet-money",
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"apple": "https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/planet-money/id290783428?mt=2",
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},
"politicalbreakdown": {
"id": "politicalbreakdown",
"title": "Political Breakdown",
"tagline": "Politics from a personal perspective",
"info": "Political Breakdown is a new series that explores the political intersection of California and the nation. Each week hosts Scott Shafer and Marisa Lagos are joined with a new special guest to unpack politics -- with personality — and offer an insider’s glimpse at how politics happens.",
"airtime": "THU 6:30pm-7pm",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Political-Breakdown-2024-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg",
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"order": 5
},
"link": "/podcasts/politicalbreakdown",
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"amazon": "https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/e0c2d153-ad36-4c8d-901d-f1da6a724824/political-breakdown",
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"possible": {
"id": "possible",
"title": "Possible",
"info": "Possible is hosted by entrepreneur Reid Hoffman and writer Aria Finger. Together in Possible, Hoffman and Finger lead enlightening discussions about building a brighter collective future. The show features interviews with visionary guests like Trevor Noah, Sam Altman and Janette Sadik-Khan. Possible paints an optimistic portrait of the world we can create through science, policy, business, art and our shared humanity. It asks: What if everything goes right for once? How can we get there? Each episode also includes a short fiction story generated by advanced AI GPT-4, serving as a thought-provoking springboard to speculate how humanity could leverage technology for good.",
"airtime": "SUN 2pm",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Possible-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg",
"officialWebsiteLink": "https://www.possible.fm/",
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"source": "Possible"
},
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