'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Finale Recap: Nevermind The End
'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 5 Recap: Hells Bells
'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 4 Recap: Drunk In Love
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'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 3 Recap: Great Balls Of Fire
'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On
'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good
9 'Game Of Thrones' Intro Parodies To Tide You Over Until The Season 8 Premiere
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In his free time, he sings his heart out at karaoke.","avatar":"https://secure.gravatar.com/avatar/6302b6f7ef8b2dcd3acd9e2c6bc570b7?s=600&d=blank&r=g","twitter":"xcusemybeauty","facebook":null,"instagram":null,"linkedin":null,"sites":[{"site":"arts","roles":["Contributor","subscriber"]},{"site":"pop","roles":["contributor"]}],"headData":{"title":"Emmanuel Hapsis | KQED","description":"KQED Contributor","ogImgSrc":"https://secure.gravatar.com/avatar/6302b6f7ef8b2dcd3acd9e2c6bc570b7?s=600&d=blank&r=g","twImgSrc":"https://secure.gravatar.com/avatar/6302b6f7ef8b2dcd3acd9e2c6bc570b7?s=600&d=blank&r=g"},"isLoading":false,"link":"/author/ehapsis"}},"breakingNewsReducer":{},"campaignFinanceReducer":{},"firebase":{"requesting":{},"requested":{},"timestamps":{},"data":{},"ordered":{},"auth":{"isLoaded":false,"isEmpty":true},"authError":null,"profile":{"isLoaded":false,"isEmpty":true},"listeners":{"byId":{},"allIds":[]},"isInitializing":false,"errors":[]},"navBarReducer":{"navBarId":"arts","fullView":true,"showPlayer":false},"navMenuReducer":{"menus":[{"key":"menu1","items":[{"name":"News","link":"/","type":"title"},{"name":"Politics","link":"/politics"},{"name":"Science","link":"/science"},{"name":"Education","link":"/educationnews"},{"name":"Housing","link":"/housing"},{"name":"Immigration","link":"/immigration"},{"name":"Criminal Justice","link":"/criminaljustice"},{"name":"Silicon Valley","link":"/siliconvalley"},{"name":"Forum","link":"/forum"},{"name":"The California Report","link":"/californiareport"}]},{"key":"menu2","items":[{"name":"Arts & Culture","link":"/arts","type":"title"},{"name":"Critics’ Picks","link":"/thedolist"},{"name":"Cultural Commentary","link":"/artscommentary"},{"name":"Food & Drink","link":"/food"},{"name":"Bay Area Hip-Hop","link":"/bayareahiphop"},{"name":"Rebel Girls","link":"/rebelgirls"},{"name":"Arts Video","link":"/artsvideos"}]},{"key":"menu3","items":[{"name":"Podcasts","link":"/podcasts","type":"title"},{"name":"Bay Curious","link":"/podcasts/baycurious"},{"name":"Rightnowish","link":"/podcasts/rightnowish"},{"name":"The Bay","link":"/podcasts/thebay"},{"name":"On Our Watch","link":"/podcasts/onourwatch"},{"name":"Mindshift","link":"/podcasts/mindshift"},{"name":"Consider This","link":"/podcasts/considerthis"},{"name":"Political Breakdown","link":"/podcasts/politicalbreakdown"}]},{"key":"menu4","items":[{"name":"Live Radio","link":"/radio","type":"title"},{"name":"TV","link":"/tv","type":"title"},{"name":"Events","link":"/events","type":"title"},{"name":"For Educators","link":"/education","type":"title"},{"name":"Support KQED","link":"/support","type":"title"},{"name":"About","link":"/about","type":"title"},{"name":"Help Center","link":"https://kqed-helpcenter.kqed.org/s","type":"title"}]}]},"pagesReducer":{},"postsReducer":{"stream_live":{"type":"live","id":"stream_live","audioUrl":"https://streams.kqed.org/kqedradio","title":"Live Stream","excerpt":"Live Stream information currently unavailable.","link":"/radio","featImg":"","label":{"name":"KQED Live","link":"/"}},"stream_kqedNewscast":{"type":"posts","id":"stream_kqedNewscast","audioUrl":"https://www.kqed.org/.stream/anon/radio/RDnews/newscast.mp3?_=1","title":"KQED Newscast","featImg":"","label":{"name":"88.5 FM","link":"/"}},"pop_112056":{"type":"posts","id":"pop_112056","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"pop","id":"112056","score":null,"sort":[1558610794000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"give-grace-jones-the-iron-throne","title":"Give Grace Jones The Iron Throne","publishDate":1558610794,"format":"audio","headTitle":"KQED Pop | KQED Arts","labelTerm":{"site":"pop"},"content":"\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">It’s game over for \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/game-of-thrones\">\u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>! Did the show stick the landing or break both of its legs, fall on its ass and require medical attention? We’ve got opinions!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-112057\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/youre-spoiling-everything-sansa-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"580\" height=\"323\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We're also handing out some tips based on the life of Grace Jones, first of her name, breaker of the gender binary.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-112058\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/grace-jones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"641\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And we're spinning some music from Greyworm (well, the actor who plays him, but you get the idea).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-112059\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/greyworm-dance-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"261\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Listen to hear all about it!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[audio src=\"https://www.kqed.org/.stream/anon/radio/thecooler/2019/05/GraceOfThrones.mp3\" title=\"Give Grace Jones The Iron Throne\" program=\"The Cooler\" image=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/grace-jones-game-of-thrones.jpg\"]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/id1041117499\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Subscribe and rate us five stars in iTunes\u003c/a>! And find us on \u003ca href=\"https://www.facebook.com/KQED-Pop-336039936485067/timeline/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Facebook\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/kqedpop\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Twitter\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Did 'Game of Thrones' stick the landing or break both of its legs, fall on its ass and require medical attention? We’ve got opinions! Also, we hand out some tips based on the life of Grace Jones, first of her name, breaker of the gender binary.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1558571421,"stats":{"hasAudio":true,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":10,"wordCount":147},"headData":{"title":"Give Grace Jones The Iron Throne | KQED","description":"Did 'Game of Thrones' stick the landing or break both of its legs, fall on its ass and require medical attention? We’ve got opinions! Also, we hand out some tips based on the life of Grace Jones, first of her name, breaker of the gender binary.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"112056 https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/?p=112056","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2019/05/23/give-grace-jones-the-iron-throne/","disqusTitle":"Give Grace Jones The Iron Throne","audioTrackLength":2221,"path":"/pop/112056/give-grace-jones-the-iron-throne","audioUrl":"https://www.kqed.org/.stream/anon/radio/thecooler/2019/05/GraceOfThrones.mp3","audioDuration":2258000,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">It’s game over for \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/game-of-thrones\">\u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>! Did the show stick the landing or break both of its legs, fall on its ass and require medical attention? We’ve got opinions!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-112057\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/youre-spoiling-everything-sansa-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"580\" height=\"323\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We're also handing out some tips based on the life of Grace Jones, first of her name, breaker of the gender binary.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-112058\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/grace-jones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"641\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And we're spinning some music from Greyworm (well, the actor who plays him, but you get the idea).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-112059\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/greyworm-dance-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"261\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Listen to hear all about it!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"audio","attributes":{"named":{"src":"https://www.kqed.org/.stream/anon/radio/thecooler/2019/05/GraceOfThrones.mp3","title":"Give Grace Jones The Iron Throne","program":"The Cooler","image":"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/grace-jones-game-of-thrones.jpg","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/id1041117499\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Subscribe and rate us five stars in iTunes\u003c/a>! And find us on \u003ca href=\"https://www.facebook.com/KQED-Pop-336039936485067/timeline/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Facebook\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/kqedpop\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Twitter\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/pop/112056/give-grace-jones-the-iron-throne","authors":["27"],"categories":["pop_2793"],"tags":["pop_3341","pop_73","pop_3660","pop_2859"],"featImg":"pop_112061","label":"pop"},"pop_111874":{"type":"posts","id":"pop_111874","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"pop","id":"111874","score":null,"sort":[1558328204000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"game-of-thrones-season-8-finale-recap-nevermind-the-end","title":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Finale Recap: Nevermind The End","publishDate":1558328204,"format":"standard","headTitle":"KQED Pop | KQED Arts","labelTerm":{"site":"pop"},"content":"\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111563/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-4-recap-drunk-in-love\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Varys got his butt torched for writing mean things about Dany in his Burn Book:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111779\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fugly-slut.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"450\" height=\"253\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany stopped wearing under eye concealer\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111782\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1020x567.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"356\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1020x567.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-800x445.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-768x427.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1200x667.png 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1038x576.png 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1920x1067.png 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM.png 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111784\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/maybe-shes-born-with-it-trixie.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"299\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98836\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/trixie-drag.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"434\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon Snow didn't help matters by making this unconvincing face after making out with Dany:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111790\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-good.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Completely over everything and everyone, Dany Pompeii'd the F out of King's Landing in a matter of minutes with little to no effort.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111796\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/what-like-its-hard.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>From her balcony, Cersei was in intense denial.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111797\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-1020x680.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until she wasn't.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111791\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/uh-oh-jim-carrey.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"285\" height=\"285\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cersei whimpered \"I don't like this!\" before being murdered by a bunch of random rocks. We were robbed of Arya doing the honors, but I guess we should cut her some slack because she was very busy trying not to be turned to ash.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111802\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/dont-be-dead-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, this is it! The last episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> we'll ever see! I hope you pre-gamed like Janelle Monae:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/JanelleMonae/status/1130234329110597632\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Are you as excited as Kenny G?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.twitter.com/kennyg/status/1130110910293532672\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>What unearned plot twist will the \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> writers force on us this time? Let the devastation and Twitter ranting begin!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">We find Tyrion walking through King’s Landing (or what’s left of it) and averting his eyes from all the extra crispy women and children sprawled all over the place. Varys’ neutered ghost wails overhead, \u003cem>TOLD YA SO!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Speaking of penis-less people, Greyworm is busy executing the handful of survivors from Cersei’s army. Jon and Davos are like, \u003cem>My dude, please have a modicum of chill! We won!\u003c/em> Greyworm is like, \u003cem>Good talk, but nah!\u003c/em> And slits a soldier’s throat.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, Tyrion takes a torch and heads down to the castle’s crypt to see if all your theories about Cersei somehow still being alive are true. It doesn’t take him long to find Jamie’s golden hand peeking out of some rocks. 100% dead. And so is Cersei. So her death really was that unsatisfying. Wow.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside, in front of all the remaining Unsullied and Dothraki soldiers, Dany makes quite the entrance that says, \u003cem>Not only am I a queen, I’m also a drama queen.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111941\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/dany-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Dany thanks all the troops for being ride or die and tells them to get ready for some more bloodshed because they're not done slaying, I mean \"liberating,\" innocents. She’s planning a field trip to Winterfell (stop feeding Ramsey's dogs now, Sansa!) and elsewhere to make sure everyone knows who’s the boss (hint: it's not Tony Danza).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Tyrion starts walking up behind Dany. OMG, is he gonna stab her??\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-103964\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/06/90210-popcorn-eating-gif-andrea.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"275\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nope! But he does slice her with some words: “You slaughtered a city.” He takes off his cute little Hand Of The Queen broach and throws it down a bunch of steps!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111975\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/BROach-drop.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So much better than a mic drop! Dany has him seized. Even if she kills him, that is a boss way to go out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon watches Fascist Dany from the sidelines and thinks, \u003cem>Damn, I knew she would take me dumping her kind of hard, but this is really next level!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Out of nowhere, Arya, the undisputed GOAT of \u003cem>GoT,\u003c/em> appears to tell Jon, \u003cem>Didn’t I say your girlfriend was cray cray banaynay??\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">I really hope Arya survives long enough to return to Winterfell and tell Sansa about all this craziness. I agree with the following Twitter user that the gossip session will begin like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/MrFlyyyGuyyy/status/1127769121318428672\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Later, Jon visits Tyrion in his holding cell and the conversation doesn't go the way Tyrion imagined it would.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>OK, that was nuts, amirite or amirite???\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Well, she had her reasons. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>WTF?!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>They cut off her BFF’s head! And they did Rhaegal dirty too, so I can see why...\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111943\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/snap-out-of-it-cher.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"238\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Tyrion's last-ditch effort is reminding Jon that Sansa is too much of a badass to bend the knee. Does he really want to see her burnt to a crisp? Jon throws Tyrion one of these ¯\\_(\u003cspan class=\"s1\">ツ\u003c/span>)_/¯ and walks out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside, Jon is making his way to Dany when there’s a shift under the ashes. It’s Drogon waking up from a well-deserved nap (his throat must be so tired from committing all that genocide). Drogon is about to do some more killing until he realizes \u003cem>Oh, it’s just my stepdad. Carry on.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Inside, Jon walks in on Dany touching the Iron Throne for the first time while singing, \"FINALLY IT’S HAPPENED TO ME RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY FACE!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xk8mm1Qmt-Y\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">He interrupts her tune by screaming, \u003cem>YOU KILLED LOTS AND LOTS OF CHILDREN!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Her response: \u003cem>That’s not a lyric from this song. You’re so random! Anyway, isn’t this great?? We get to rule together now. This is how the story was always supposed to end and isn't in any way a very rushed botch job by David Benioff and D.B. Weiss!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon agrees and they make out. And then he sticks something in her.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/gilly-raise-eyebrows-wiig-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"180\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Get your mind out of the gutter! It’s a knife!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Blood pours out of Dany's nose and mouth and, just like that, her brief reign of terror is officially over.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Huh. Well, that was underwhelming.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111944\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-1020x680.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-1200x800.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-1920x1280.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">At least she didn't go out because of a little infection like Khal Drogo, but still.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Sensing something amiss, Drogon rolls up on Jon with a quickness. He nudges his mommy, but she doesn’t move. Who needs a live-action \u003cem>Lion King\u003c/em> when we have this scene?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111945\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/simba-you-gotta-get-up.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"220\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I don't know about y'all, but this has me all the way in my feelings.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-102001\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/jujubee-eyelash-crying.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"220\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Drogon looks at Jon like, \u003cem>Really, dude?! I knew my mom shouldn't have dated you!! \u003c/em>He gets his throat flames ready and lets them rip!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">But he aims for the Iron Throne instead, melting it all the way down, as if to say, \u003cem>Can y’all humans chill now that the ugly ass chair is gone??? Ok great. I’m taking this btw.\u003c/em> Drogon grabs his mommy and flies away.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106655\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/sad-wilfred-doctor-who-crying-old-man-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"147\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">I love you, Drogon! Here’s hoping the only thing you ever have to toast again are s’mores.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Time passes. Greyworm brings a heavily bearded Tyrion outside to a panel of people. Arya is there! Sansa too! Gendry, Yara, Brienne and other VIPs! But we need to pause real quick and recognize one guest in particular. This guy:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111946\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-19-at-9.17.36-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"710\" height=\"872\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-19-at-9.17.36-PM.png 710w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-19-at-9.17.36-PM-160x197.png 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 710px) 100vw, 710px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He's a grown-up version of this mama's boy:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111947\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn-1020x574.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn-1200x675.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He aged, Neville Longbottom style! Turns out being breastfed until you're in your teens makes you hot. Who knew?!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyway, back to the actual plot...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Greyworm refuses to bring Jon out from his cell and Yara agrees that Jon must be brutally punished for sticking a knife in Dany's heart. Arya has some thoughts about that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"Say another word about killing my brother and I'll cut your throat.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Go off, sis!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Yara knows she's no match for Arya so she promptly shuts the F up.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Tyrion tells them they need to elect a new ruler to make these kinds of decisions. A random dude none of us remember decides to embody the overconfidence of mediocre white men everywhere by nominating himself. Sansa quickly sets him straight with three words: \"Please sit down.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111948\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sit-down-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>CROWN HER ALREADY!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despite being wrong about pretty much everything this entire series, Tyrion decides to give another TedTalk that no one asked for. He believes the ruler should be the person with the best story.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, so Arya then. She trained with the best killers around and became faceless and blind. She killed the Night King without any backup. She had sex with Gendry one single time and had him proposing before the night was over. Best story, hands down.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Wait, what was that? For some reason, I just heard Tyrion say Bran.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111949\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/her.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"208\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Socially awkward Bran? The one who creeps everyone out and always talks like he just took a huge hit from a bong? That Bran??\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111953\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/choices-tati-drag-race.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"267\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I never saw this coming because it's such a dumb ending, but I guess I should have known, considering the trajectory of this season. Yikes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Why is everyone listening to Tyrion anyway?! He's a prisoner! He snitched on his best friend and got him torched just last week! And he's part of the reason why King's Landing is a ruin!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sansa is the first to say, \u003cem>Hey, everyone. This is a dumb idea!\u003c/em> But everyone goes along with it because the writers of this show are just making things up on the fly at this point. Sansa is like, \u003cem>Ok fine, my weirdo baby bro can be king, but Winterfell is Winterfexitting from the kingdom. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It is decided that Jon won't be put to death but will be exiled to the Night Watch forever and disallowed from ever having sex again. Tyrion, on the other hand, gets to become the Hand of the King.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111950\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/that-is-so-stupid.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"123\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As he's being taken back up North, Jon pauses to say goodbye to Sansa, Arya and Bran. Arya tears up because she probably won't see him again. You see, she's going to sail out west to discover—and I guess colonize?—whatever is out there.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111951\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/colbert-facepalm.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"239\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In the castle, Brienne sits down, looking through a book full of lords’ life stories. She finds Jamie's page and starts writing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cem>A scrub is a guy who can’t get no love from me.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Actually, no. What she really writes is a very revisionist, d*ckmatized version of events. This is supposed to be sweet, I think, but I'm just annoyed they've reduced this amazing character to just someone who has a crush on Jamie Lannister.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107558\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/eyeroll-drink-nicole-richie.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"540\" height=\"283\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>There's a whole long scene involving Bronn (why did he survive?), Sam (again, why did he survive?), Tyrion and the other members of Bran's cabinet arguing about how to rebuild the kingdom. At this point, I can't even pretend to care. I'm sure they'll figure it out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Up north, Jon arrives at the Wall and Tormund is there to greet him. At least these two can be BFFs until they're old and grey. This is one of the only things I like about this episode.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Wait a second! There's something I like even more than that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>JON SEES GHOST AND ACTUALLY PETS HIM THIS TIME!!!!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111952\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/boop-got-ghost.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101824\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/yas-excited-crying-happy-tears-antm.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"260\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Now, a montage of all the Stark kids getting their own spinoff shows. Sansa is flexing like the queen she is in Winterfell. Arya is doing that arms-spread \u003cem>Titanic\u003c/em> pose on some boat. Bran is... being Bran. And Jon follows a procession of wildlings into the woods until everything fades to black.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Wow. So that was the end of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>, huh? My feelings on how the writers decided to end this once-upon-a-time wonderful show can best be expressed with the following six-second clip:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grIOioq5DdQ\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That's all, folks! It's been a pleasure watching along with you. If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111777/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-5-recap-hells-bells\">'Game of Throne' Season 8 Episode 5 Recap: Hells Bells\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111563/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-4-recap-drunk-in-love\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 4 Recap: Drunk In Love\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 3 Recap: Great Balls of Fire\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Need someone to process that choice of an ending with? This recap has your back!","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1558369578,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":true,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":75,"wordCount":2008},"headData":{"title":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Finale Recap: Nevermind The End | KQED","description":"Need someone to process that choice of an ending with? This recap has your back!","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"111874 https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/?p=111874","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2019/05/19/game-of-thrones-season-8-finale-recap-nevermind-the-end/","disqusTitle":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Finale Recap: Nevermind The End","path":"/pop/111874/game-of-thrones-season-8-finale-recap-nevermind-the-end","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111563/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-4-recap-drunk-in-love\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, Varys got his butt torched for writing mean things about Dany in his Burn Book:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111779\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fugly-slut.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"450\" height=\"253\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany stopped wearing under eye concealer\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111782\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1020x567.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"356\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1020x567.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-800x445.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-768x427.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1200x667.png 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1038x576.png 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1920x1067.png 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM.png 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111784\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/maybe-shes-born-with-it-trixie.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"299\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98836\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/trixie-drag.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"434\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon Snow didn't help matters by making this unconvincing face after making out with Dany:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111790\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-good.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Completely over everything and everyone, Dany Pompeii'd the F out of King's Landing in a matter of minutes with little to no effort.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111796\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/what-like-its-hard.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>From her balcony, Cersei was in intense denial.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111797\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-1020x680.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until she wasn't.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111791\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/uh-oh-jim-carrey.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"285\" height=\"285\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cersei whimpered \"I don't like this!\" before being murdered by a bunch of random rocks. We were robbed of Arya doing the honors, but I guess we should cut her some slack because she was very busy trying not to be turned to ash.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111802\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/dont-be-dead-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, this is it! The last episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> we'll ever see! I hope you pre-gamed like Janelle Monae:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"singleTwitterStatus","attributes":{"named":{"id":"1130234329110597632"},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>Are you as excited as Kenny G?\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"singleTwitterStatus","attributes":{"named":{"id":"1130110910293532672"},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>What unearned plot twist will the \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> writers force on us this time? Let the devastation and Twitter ranting begin!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">We find Tyrion walking through King’s Landing (or what’s left of it) and averting his eyes from all the extra crispy women and children sprawled all over the place. Varys’ neutered ghost wails overhead, \u003cem>TOLD YA SO!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Speaking of penis-less people, Greyworm is busy executing the handful of survivors from Cersei’s army. Jon and Davos are like, \u003cem>My dude, please have a modicum of chill! We won!\u003c/em> Greyworm is like, \u003cem>Good talk, but nah!\u003c/em> And slits a soldier’s throat.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, Tyrion takes a torch and heads down to the castle’s crypt to see if all your theories about Cersei somehow still being alive are true. It doesn’t take him long to find Jamie’s golden hand peeking out of some rocks. 100% dead. And so is Cersei. So her death really was that unsatisfying. Wow.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside, in front of all the remaining Unsullied and Dothraki soldiers, Dany makes quite the entrance that says, \u003cem>Not only am I a queen, I’m also a drama queen.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111941\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/dany-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Dany thanks all the troops for being ride or die and tells them to get ready for some more bloodshed because they're not done slaying, I mean \"liberating,\" innocents. She’s planning a field trip to Winterfell (stop feeding Ramsey's dogs now, Sansa!) and elsewhere to make sure everyone knows who’s the boss (hint: it's not Tony Danza).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Tyrion starts walking up behind Dany. OMG, is he gonna stab her??\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-103964\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/06/90210-popcorn-eating-gif-andrea.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"275\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nope! But he does slice her with some words: “You slaughtered a city.” He takes off his cute little Hand Of The Queen broach and throws it down a bunch of steps!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111975\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/BROach-drop.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So much better than a mic drop! Dany has him seized. Even if she kills him, that is a boss way to go out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon watches Fascist Dany from the sidelines and thinks, \u003cem>Damn, I knew she would take me dumping her kind of hard, but this is really next level!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Out of nowhere, Arya, the undisputed GOAT of \u003cem>GoT,\u003c/em> appears to tell Jon, \u003cem>Didn’t I say your girlfriend was cray cray banaynay??\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">I really hope Arya survives long enough to return to Winterfell and tell Sansa about all this craziness. I agree with the following Twitter user that the gossip session will begin like this:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"singleTwitterStatus","attributes":{"named":{"id":"1127769121318428672"},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Later, Jon visits Tyrion in his holding cell and the conversation doesn't go the way Tyrion imagined it would.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>OK, that was nuts, amirite or amirite???\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Well, she had her reasons. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>WTF?!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>They cut off her BFF’s head! And they did Rhaegal dirty too, so I can see why...\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111943\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/snap-out-of-it-cher.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"238\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Tyrion's last-ditch effort is reminding Jon that Sansa is too much of a badass to bend the knee. Does he really want to see her burnt to a crisp? Jon throws Tyrion one of these ¯\\_(\u003cspan class=\"s1\">ツ\u003c/span>)_/¯ and walks out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside, Jon is making his way to Dany when there’s a shift under the ashes. It’s Drogon waking up from a well-deserved nap (his throat must be so tired from committing all that genocide). Drogon is about to do some more killing until he realizes \u003cem>Oh, it’s just my stepdad. Carry on.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Inside, Jon walks in on Dany touching the Iron Throne for the first time while singing, \"FINALLY IT’S HAPPENED TO ME RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY FACE!\"\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/xk8mm1Qmt-Y'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/xk8mm1Qmt-Y'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp class=\"p1\">He interrupts her tune by screaming, \u003cem>YOU KILLED LOTS AND LOTS OF CHILDREN!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Her response: \u003cem>That’s not a lyric from this song. You’re so random! Anyway, isn’t this great?? We get to rule together now. This is how the story was always supposed to end and isn't in any way a very rushed botch job by David Benioff and D.B. Weiss!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon agrees and they make out. And then he sticks something in her.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/gilly-raise-eyebrows-wiig-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"180\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Get your mind out of the gutter! It’s a knife!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Blood pours out of Dany's nose and mouth and, just like that, her brief reign of terror is officially over.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Huh. Well, that was underwhelming.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111944\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-1020x680.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-1200x800.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone-1920x1280.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/meh-gravstone.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">At least she didn't go out because of a little infection like Khal Drogo, but still.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Sensing something amiss, Drogon rolls up on Jon with a quickness. He nudges his mommy, but she doesn’t move. Who needs a live-action \u003cem>Lion King\u003c/em> when we have this scene?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111945\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/simba-you-gotta-get-up.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"220\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I don't know about y'all, but this has me all the way in my feelings.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-102001\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/jujubee-eyelash-crying.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"220\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Drogon looks at Jon like, \u003cem>Really, dude?! I knew my mom shouldn't have dated you!! \u003c/em>He gets his throat flames ready and lets them rip!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">But he aims for the Iron Throne instead, melting it all the way down, as if to say, \u003cem>Can y’all humans chill now that the ugly ass chair is gone??? Ok great. I’m taking this btw.\u003c/em> Drogon grabs his mommy and flies away.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106655\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/sad-wilfred-doctor-who-crying-old-man-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"147\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">I love you, Drogon! Here’s hoping the only thing you ever have to toast again are s’mores.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Time passes. Greyworm brings a heavily bearded Tyrion outside to a panel of people. Arya is there! Sansa too! Gendry, Yara, Brienne and other VIPs! But we need to pause real quick and recognize one guest in particular. This guy:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111946\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-19-at-9.17.36-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"710\" height=\"872\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-19-at-9.17.36-PM.png 710w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-19-at-9.17.36-PM-160x197.png 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 710px) 100vw, 710px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He's a grown-up version of this mama's boy:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111947\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn-1020x574.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn-1200x675.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/robin-arryn.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He aged, Neville Longbottom style! Turns out being breastfed until you're in your teens makes you hot. Who knew?!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyway, back to the actual plot...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Greyworm refuses to bring Jon out from his cell and Yara agrees that Jon must be brutally punished for sticking a knife in Dany's heart. Arya has some thoughts about that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"Say another word about killing my brother and I'll cut your throat.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Go off, sis!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Yara knows she's no match for Arya so she promptly shuts the F up.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Tyrion tells them they need to elect a new ruler to make these kinds of decisions. A random dude none of us remember decides to embody the overconfidence of mediocre white men everywhere by nominating himself. Sansa quickly sets him straight with three words: \"Please sit down.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111948\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sit-down-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>CROWN HER ALREADY!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despite being wrong about pretty much everything this entire series, Tyrion decides to give another TedTalk that no one asked for. He believes the ruler should be the person with the best story.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, so Arya then. She trained with the best killers around and became faceless and blind. She killed the Night King without any backup. She had sex with Gendry one single time and had him proposing before the night was over. Best story, hands down.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Wait, what was that? For some reason, I just heard Tyrion say Bran.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111949\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/her.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"208\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Socially awkward Bran? The one who creeps everyone out and always talks like he just took a huge hit from a bong? That Bran??\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111953\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/choices-tati-drag-race.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"267\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I never saw this coming because it's such a dumb ending, but I guess I should have known, considering the trajectory of this season. Yikes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Why is everyone listening to Tyrion anyway?! He's a prisoner! He snitched on his best friend and got him torched just last week! And he's part of the reason why King's Landing is a ruin!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sansa is the first to say, \u003cem>Hey, everyone. This is a dumb idea!\u003c/em> But everyone goes along with it because the writers of this show are just making things up on the fly at this point. Sansa is like, \u003cem>Ok fine, my weirdo baby bro can be king, but Winterfell is Winterfexitting from the kingdom. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It is decided that Jon won't be put to death but will be exiled to the Night Watch forever and disallowed from ever having sex again. Tyrion, on the other hand, gets to become the Hand of the King.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111950\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/that-is-so-stupid.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"123\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As he's being taken back up North, Jon pauses to say goodbye to Sansa, Arya and Bran. Arya tears up because she probably won't see him again. You see, she's going to sail out west to discover—and I guess colonize?—whatever is out there.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111951\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/colbert-facepalm.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"239\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In the castle, Brienne sits down, looking through a book full of lords’ life stories. She finds Jamie's page and starts writing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cem>A scrub is a guy who can’t get no love from me.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Actually, no. What she really writes is a very revisionist, d*ckmatized version of events. This is supposed to be sweet, I think, but I'm just annoyed they've reduced this amazing character to just someone who has a crush on Jamie Lannister.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107558\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/eyeroll-drink-nicole-richie.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"540\" height=\"283\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>There's a whole long scene involving Bronn (why did he survive?), Sam (again, why did he survive?), Tyrion and the other members of Bran's cabinet arguing about how to rebuild the kingdom. At this point, I can't even pretend to care. I'm sure they'll figure it out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Up north, Jon arrives at the Wall and Tormund is there to greet him. At least these two can be BFFs until they're old and grey. This is one of the only things I like about this episode.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Wait a second! There's something I like even more than that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>JON SEES GHOST AND ACTUALLY PETS HIM THIS TIME!!!!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111952\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/boop-got-ghost.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101824\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/yas-excited-crying-happy-tears-antm.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"260\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Now, a montage of all the Stark kids getting their own spinoff shows. Sansa is flexing like the queen she is in Winterfell. Arya is doing that arms-spread \u003cem>Titanic\u003c/em> pose on some boat. Bran is... being Bran. And Jon follows a procession of wildlings into the woods until everything fades to black.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Wow. So that was the end of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>, huh? My feelings on how the writers decided to end this once-upon-a-time wonderful show can best be expressed with the following six-second clip:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/grIOioq5DdQ'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/grIOioq5DdQ'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>That's all, folks! It's been a pleasure watching along with you. If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111777/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-5-recap-hells-bells\">'Game of Throne' Season 8 Episode 5 Recap: Hells Bells\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111563/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-4-recap-drunk-in-love\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 4 Recap: Drunk In Love\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 3 Recap: Great Balls of Fire\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/pop/111874/game-of-thrones-season-8-finale-recap-nevermind-the-end","authors":["27"],"categories":["pop_3"],"tags":["pop_3341","pop_73","pop_8"],"featImg":"pop_111875","label":"pop"},"pop_111777":{"type":"posts","id":"pop_111777","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"pop","id":"111777","score":null,"sort":[1557729864000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-5-recap-hells-bells","title":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 5 Recap: Hells Bells","publishDate":1557729864,"format":"standard","headTitle":"KQED Pop | KQED Arts","labelTerm":{"site":"pop"},"content":"\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111563/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-4-recap-drunk-in-love\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, there was a lot of loss. Missandei lost her head, Brienne lost her V card and, with Rhaegal's senseless death, this gif I made at the beginning of the season lost its value.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Overall, the \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em> fandom has been dealing with a tsunami of emotions.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111621\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/feels-waves-emotional.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And there are more feels where those came from, judging by these \u003cem>Ima-get-you\u003c/em> faces:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111627\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-means-war-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let the devastation begin!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We find Lord Varys scribbling up a storm about Daenerys in his Burn Book.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111779\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fugly-slut.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"450\" height=\"253\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Varys still doesn't think she's \"likable\" or \"electable\" enough to win \u003cdel>the 2020 Democratic primary\u003c/del> the battle for the Iron Throne, so he tries to sell Jon on this whole ruling thing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Varys:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>C'mon, dude! You'll get to sit on a cool chair! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>It's a no from me, dawg. #ImWithHer.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Tyrion sees all the messy pot-stirring Varys is up to and snitches.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, Queen D, I've got some breaking news!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hmm, lemme guess. Some dude is betraying me again.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Oh, wow! How did you know?!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Patriarchy works in predictable ways. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Dany is officially done with everyone and everything, including under-eye concealer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111782\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1020x567.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"356\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1020x567.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-800x445.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-768x427.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1200x667.png 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1038x576.png 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1920x1067.png 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM.png 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111784\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/maybe-shes-born-with-it-trixie.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"299\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98836\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/trixie-drag.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"434\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in his bedroom, Varys is plotting to fling photocopies of his Burn Book pages all over Westeros.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111785\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/throw-paper-mean-girls.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"270\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But before he gets the chance, Dany has him marched outside to be executed.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98528\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/boy-that-escalated-quickly.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"355\" height=\"186\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Moments before Varys meets his maker, Tyrion tells him, \"It was me.\" Just like that time Melania Tr*mp plagiarized Michelle Obama's speech, Tyrion is copying someone else's homework:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111787\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tell-cersei-i-want-her-to-know-it-was-me.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"215\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nice try, Tyrion, but Lady Olenna already has this phrase trademarked and merchandized.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111788\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/it-was-me-got-shirt.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/it-was-me-got-shirt.jpg 679w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/it-was-me-got-shirt-160x160.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">But back to this execution. The last thing Varys sees is this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111789\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fml-got-varys-death.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In the most listless, bored tone I've ever heard, Dany instructs Drogon to torch Varys' ass and proves that she doesn't need some rude little book to burn her enemies.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-61174\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/ooh-burn-emma-stone.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"209\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back inside, Dany lets Jon feel some heat too. \u003cem>WHAT \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> DID \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> I \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> SAY \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> WOULD \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> HAPPEN \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span>\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>IF \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> YOU \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> TOLD \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> YOUR \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> SISTER??? \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon tries to calm her down by declaring that she's still his queen and that he totally has the hots for her and doesn't in any way want to vom in his mouth when they make out now that he knows she's his aunt. After a pitiful round of tonsil hockey, Jon makes this face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111790\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-good.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In that moment, Dany decides she's in the mood to butcher some innocents. Hell hath no fury like an auntie scorned.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The next day, news breaks that Jamie has been captured trying to rejoin #TeamCersei. Dany takes it out on the nearest Lannister: \"The next time you fail me will be the last time you fail me.\" Harsh employee review, but the woman has a point. For a supposed genius, Tyrion has been wrong pretty much this entire series. Someone is in danger of getting fired from his position as the Hand of the Queen (and literally fired by Drogon too).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside the gates of King's Landing, some low-level employee stops Arya and Clegane from entering.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Low-Level Employee:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Can I see your I.D.?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Sup, bro? I'm the girl who killed the Night King and the reason we’re all still alive. Let me through so I can kill Cersei real quick and no more fan favorites have to die. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Low-Level Employee:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Ummm, I’m gonna have to talk to my manager.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109068\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/01/facepalm-judge-judy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because Tyrion apparently has a death wish, he decides to continue his streak of fireable offenses. This time, it's freeing Jamie. Tyrion hopes that if Jamie and Cersei run off to live happily ever after with their twincest baby, everyone can just skip this whole war thing. Yeah, good luck with that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before parting, Tyrion thanks Jamie for being “the only one who didn’t treat me like a monster.” That sweet brother moment means that one of them is totally going to die very soon.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next morning, Dany is sick of waiting to incinerate everyone so she takes Drogon out for a ride and promptly smokes Euron's entire fleet.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111793\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/torch-ships-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And all those stupid spear throwers.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111795\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/got-fire-spear.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And the city walls.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111794\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/gate-got-fire.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany's official statement on destroying all of Cersei's defenses in the matter of a few minutes:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111796\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/what-like-its-hard.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, up in the Red Keep, a very delusional Cersei watches all the destruction below and thinks, \u003cem>This is fine\u003c/em>.\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111797\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-1020x680.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Well, I still have those dart thrower thingys!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei's Creepy Personal Assistant:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Actually, no.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Well, Euron nailed Rhaegal harder than he nailed me the other night. He and his fleet got this!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei's Creepy Personal Assistant:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Uh, about that... Euron was blasted out of his boat and his entire fleet is at the bottom of the bay.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111791\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/uh-oh-jim-carrey.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"285\" height=\"285\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Down in the city, what remains of Cersei’s army decides they have had their fill of the smell of their burnt friends so they surrender. They ring the town's We-Give-Up-Please-Stop bells.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Dany takes a moment to take all of this in. King's Landing is finally hers! She's won! This is what she's been working so hard for since Season 1! And yet, the feeling is just meh and fails to live up to her pyro fantasies, so Dany decides to obliterate the entire town, block by block, for shits and giggles.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, on a beach below King's Landing, while Jamie preps his elope boat, Euron randomly walks out of the waves. They proceed to fight over Cersei and who has the bigger you-know-what. Euron gets a few stabs in, but Jamie’s love for his twin sister baby mama gives him the second wind he needs to take his sword and do this to Euron’s intestines:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111798\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/twist-spaghetti-fork.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"255\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in King's Landing, buildings are collapsing left and right and everything is on fire. Clegane convinces Arya to get out while she still can. She thanks him for everything and I may or may not tear up a little.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111799\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/not-crying-raining-on-my-fac.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"262\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">CleganeBowl, the brother showdown we've all been waiting for is finally upon us! The Hound and the Mountain trade jabs for a while, until the Hound stabs right through his brother's torso! But because the Mountain is a mutant or whatever, it's the equivalent of a medium gnarly paper cut.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The Mountain's headwear gets knocked off, revealing that he's been Darth Vader this whole time.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111800\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/darth-vader-without-helmet.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"512\" height=\"256\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">He proceeds to strip because this show is obsessed with showing us nipples.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111801\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-bro.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The Mountain tries to crush the Hound's skull as he did to that hot bisexual dude from Dorne, but the Hound stabs him in the eye (Lyanna Mormont's impact!) and then decks him off the building and into the inferno below. You were a wild one, Clegane. Peace out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111441\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-rbg.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside, Arya is having a very hard time not getting trampled to death like Simba's dad.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cut to this harrowing moment:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111802\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/dont-be-dead-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Arya lives! Now, she just needs to get her butt back to Winterfell pronto. Nymeria, the dire wolf, can’t lose her mama on Mother’s Day!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ugh, Arya's problems are still not over. A huge tower almost falls on her head!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101975\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/oh-come-on-jim-carrey-liar-liar.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"374\" height=\"379\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">She's been through enough! I feel bullied by the writers of this show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back in the castle, Jamie finds Cersei and they run to the tunnel that leads to their elope boat. But it's blocked by debris! Cersei sobs, \"I want our baby to live.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">YOU COULD HAVE SAID THAT LAST WEEK INSTEAD OF CHOPPING OFF MISSANDEI’S HEAD BUT NOOOOO.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Cersei continues moaning, \"I don’t want to die. Please don’t let me die. I don’t like this!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Hey, Cersei, you know who else didn’t “like this”? My girl Margaery Tyrell and all those other people you blew to smithereens in that church. Or Sansa's dire wolf, Lady, who you had killed way back when. Or pretty much 95% of the characters on this show that have been terrorized by you for eight seasons. Forgive me if I don't shed a tear for you.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107562\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/ebony-antm-fake-crying.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"164\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">As the ceiling above their heads crumbles, Jamie tells Cersei, \"Nothing else matters. Only us.\" Then they are both crushed to death. I would have preferred if Arya did the honors, but this works too. Talk to y'all never!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19742\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/tumblr_n2dkpmzid11rfduvxo1_250.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back in the streets, a traumatized, ash-covered Arya looks on in horror at all the Pompeii-ified remains of civilians. A random white horse is the only living thing in sight. Arya whispers to it, \u003cem>Can you believe this sh*t?\u003c/em> and rides off to brainstorm which face she'll wear when she murders Dany in the series finale.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111563/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-4-recap-drunk-in-love\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 4 Recap: Drunk In Love\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 3 Recap: Great Balls of Fire\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Need someone to process ALL OF THAT with? This recap has your back!","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1557771034,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":70,"wordCount":1600},"headData":{"title":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 5 Recap: Hells Bells | KQED","description":"Need someone to process ALL OF THAT with? This recap has your back!","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"111777 https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/?p=111777","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2019/05/12/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-5-recap-hells-bells/","disqusTitle":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 5 Recap: Hells Bells","path":"/pop/111777/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-5-recap-hells-bells","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111563/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-4-recap-drunk-in-love\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, there was a lot of loss. Missandei lost her head, Brienne lost her V card and, with Rhaegal's senseless death, this gif I made at the beginning of the season lost its value.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Overall, the \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em> fandom has been dealing with a tsunami of emotions.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111621\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/feels-waves-emotional.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And there are more feels where those came from, judging by these \u003cem>Ima-get-you\u003c/em> faces:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111627\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-means-war-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let the devastation begin!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We find Lord Varys scribbling up a storm about Daenerys in his Burn Book.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111779\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fugly-slut.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"450\" height=\"253\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Varys still doesn't think she's \"likable\" or \"electable\" enough to win \u003cdel>the 2020 Democratic primary\u003c/del> the battle for the Iron Throne, so he tries to sell Jon on this whole ruling thing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Varys:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>C'mon, dude! You'll get to sit on a cool chair! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>It's a no from me, dawg. #ImWithHer.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Tyrion sees all the messy pot-stirring Varys is up to and snitches.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, Queen D, I've got some breaking news!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hmm, lemme guess. Some dude is betraying me again.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Oh, wow! How did you know?!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Patriarchy works in predictable ways. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Dany is officially done with everyone and everything, including under-eye concealer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111782\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1020x567.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"356\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1020x567.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-800x445.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-768x427.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1200x667.png 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1038x576.png 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM-1920x1067.png 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/Screen-Shot-2019-05-12-at-6.14.17-PM.png 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111784\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/maybe-shes-born-with-it-trixie.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"299\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98836\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/trixie-drag.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"434\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in his bedroom, Varys is plotting to fling photocopies of his Burn Book pages all over Westeros.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111785\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/throw-paper-mean-girls.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"270\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But before he gets the chance, Dany has him marched outside to be executed.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98528\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/boy-that-escalated-quickly.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"355\" height=\"186\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Moments before Varys meets his maker, Tyrion tells him, \"It was me.\" Just like that time Melania Tr*mp plagiarized Michelle Obama's speech, Tyrion is copying someone else's homework:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111787\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tell-cersei-i-want-her-to-know-it-was-me.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"215\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nice try, Tyrion, but Lady Olenna already has this phrase trademarked and merchandized.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111788\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/it-was-me-got-shirt.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/it-was-me-got-shirt.jpg 679w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/it-was-me-got-shirt-160x160.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">But back to this execution. The last thing Varys sees is this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111789\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fml-got-varys-death.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In the most listless, bored tone I've ever heard, Dany instructs Drogon to torch Varys' ass and proves that she doesn't need some rude little book to burn her enemies.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-61174\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/ooh-burn-emma-stone.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"209\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back inside, Dany lets Jon feel some heat too. \u003cem>WHAT \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> DID \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> I \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> SAY \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> WOULD \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> HAPPEN \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span>\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"> \u003c/span>IF \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> YOU \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> TOLD \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> YOUR \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span> SISTER??? \u003cspan class=\"s1\">👏\u003c/span>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon tries to calm her down by declaring that she's still his queen and that he totally has the hots for her and doesn't in any way want to vom in his mouth when they make out now that he knows she's his aunt. After a pitiful round of tonsil hockey, Jon makes this face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111790\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-good.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In that moment, Dany decides she's in the mood to butcher some innocents. Hell hath no fury like an auntie scorned.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The next day, news breaks that Jamie has been captured trying to rejoin #TeamCersei. Dany takes it out on the nearest Lannister: \"The next time you fail me will be the last time you fail me.\" Harsh employee review, but the woman has a point. For a supposed genius, Tyrion has been wrong pretty much this entire series. Someone is in danger of getting fired from his position as the Hand of the Queen (and literally fired by Drogon too).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside the gates of King's Landing, some low-level employee stops Arya and Clegane from entering.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Low-Level Employee:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Can I see your I.D.?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Sup, bro? I'm the girl who killed the Night King and the reason we’re all still alive. Let me through so I can kill Cersei real quick and no more fan favorites have to die. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Low-Level Employee:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Ummm, I’m gonna have to talk to my manager.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109068\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/01/facepalm-judge-judy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because Tyrion apparently has a death wish, he decides to continue his streak of fireable offenses. This time, it's freeing Jamie. Tyrion hopes that if Jamie and Cersei run off to live happily ever after with their twincest baby, everyone can just skip this whole war thing. Yeah, good luck with that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before parting, Tyrion thanks Jamie for being “the only one who didn’t treat me like a monster.” That sweet brother moment means that one of them is totally going to die very soon.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next morning, Dany is sick of waiting to incinerate everyone so she takes Drogon out for a ride and promptly smokes Euron's entire fleet.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111793\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/torch-ships-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And all those stupid spear throwers.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111795\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/got-fire-spear.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And the city walls.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111794\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/gate-got-fire.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany's official statement on destroying all of Cersei's defenses in the matter of a few minutes:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111796\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/what-like-its-hard.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, up in the Red Keep, a very delusional Cersei watches all the destruction below and thinks, \u003cem>This is fine\u003c/em>.\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111797\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-1020x680.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-is-fine-fire.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Well, I still have those dart thrower thingys!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei's Creepy Personal Assistant:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Actually, no.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Well, Euron nailed Rhaegal harder than he nailed me the other night. He and his fleet got this!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei's Creepy Personal Assistant:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Uh, about that... Euron was blasted out of his boat and his entire fleet is at the bottom of the bay.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111791\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/uh-oh-jim-carrey.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"285\" height=\"285\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Down in the city, what remains of Cersei’s army decides they have had their fill of the smell of their burnt friends so they surrender. They ring the town's We-Give-Up-Please-Stop bells.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Dany takes a moment to take all of this in. King's Landing is finally hers! She's won! This is what she's been working so hard for since Season 1! And yet, the feeling is just meh and fails to live up to her pyro fantasies, so Dany decides to obliterate the entire town, block by block, for shits and giggles.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, on a beach below King's Landing, while Jamie preps his elope boat, Euron randomly walks out of the waves. They proceed to fight over Cersei and who has the bigger you-know-what. Euron gets a few stabs in, but Jamie’s love for his twin sister baby mama gives him the second wind he needs to take his sword and do this to Euron’s intestines:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111798\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/twist-spaghetti-fork.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"255\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in King's Landing, buildings are collapsing left and right and everything is on fire. Clegane convinces Arya to get out while she still can. She thanks him for everything and I may or may not tear up a little.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111799\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/not-crying-raining-on-my-fac.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"262\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">CleganeBowl, the brother showdown we've all been waiting for is finally upon us! The Hound and the Mountain trade jabs for a while, until the Hound stabs right through his brother's torso! But because the Mountain is a mutant or whatever, it's the equivalent of a medium gnarly paper cut.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The Mountain's headwear gets knocked off, revealing that he's been Darth Vader this whole time.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111800\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/darth-vader-without-helmet.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"512\" height=\"256\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">He proceeds to strip because this show is obsessed with showing us nipples.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111801\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-bro.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The Mountain tries to crush the Hound's skull as he did to that hot bisexual dude from Dorne, but the Hound stabs him in the eye (Lyanna Mormont's impact!) and then decks him off the building and into the inferno below. You were a wild one, Clegane. Peace out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111441\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-rbg.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside, Arya is having a very hard time not getting trampled to death like Simba's dad.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cut to this harrowing moment:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111802\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/dont-be-dead-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Arya lives! Now, she just needs to get her butt back to Winterfell pronto. Nymeria, the dire wolf, can’t lose her mama on Mother’s Day!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ugh, Arya's problems are still not over. A huge tower almost falls on her head!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101975\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/oh-come-on-jim-carrey-liar-liar.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"374\" height=\"379\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">She's been through enough! I feel bullied by the writers of this show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back in the castle, Jamie finds Cersei and they run to the tunnel that leads to their elope boat. But it's blocked by debris! Cersei sobs, \"I want our baby to live.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">YOU COULD HAVE SAID THAT LAST WEEK INSTEAD OF CHOPPING OFF MISSANDEI’S HEAD BUT NOOOOO.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Cersei continues moaning, \"I don’t want to die. Please don’t let me die. I don’t like this!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Hey, Cersei, you know who else didn’t “like this”? My girl Margaery Tyrell and all those other people you blew to smithereens in that church. Or Sansa's dire wolf, Lady, who you had killed way back when. Or pretty much 95% of the characters on this show that have been terrorized by you for eight seasons. Forgive me if I don't shed a tear for you.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107562\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/ebony-antm-fake-crying.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"164\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">As the ceiling above their heads crumbles, Jamie tells Cersei, \"Nothing else matters. Only us.\" Then they are both crushed to death. I would have preferred if Arya did the honors, but this works too. Talk to y'all never!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19742\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/tumblr_n2dkpmzid11rfduvxo1_250.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back in the streets, a traumatized, ash-covered Arya looks on in horror at all the Pompeii-ified remains of civilians. A random white horse is the only living thing in sight. Arya whispers to it, \u003cem>Can you believe this sh*t?\u003c/em> and rides off to brainstorm which face she'll wear when she murders Dany in the series finale.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111563/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-4-recap-drunk-in-love\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 4 Recap: Drunk In Love\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 3 Recap: Great Balls of Fire\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/pop/111777/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-5-recap-hells-bells","authors":["27"],"categories":["pop_3"],"tags":["pop_3341","pop_73","pop_8"],"featImg":"pop_111803","label":"pop"},"pop_111563":{"type":"posts","id":"pop_111563","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"pop","id":"111563","score":null,"sort":[1557127014000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-4-recap-drunk-in-love","title":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 4 Recap: Drunk In Love","publishDate":1557127014,"format":"standard","headTitle":"KQED Pop | KQED Arts","labelTerm":{"site":"pop"},"content":"\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, all hell broke loose.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This Lyanna Mormont moment captures the essence of the Battle of Winterfell:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111414\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/lyanna-mormont-battle-of-winterfell.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone's favorite middle schooler ended up dying, along with Jorah, Melisandre, pretty much all the Dothraki, Theon and some other randos.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111424\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-beer.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, and ARYA MOTHER F*CKING STARK SINGLE-HANDEDLY KILLED THE NIGHT KING! If you missed that moment or just want to see it again, here it is, complete with added celebratory scenes from \u003cem>The Truman Show\u003c/em> because I'm random.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/1122712859421499393\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Now with the existential threat of the Night King and his dead army gone, what in the world is going to happen next? Let's find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's the morning after the Battle of Winterfell. The camera slowly pans up the body of a fallen hero. The MVP. It's obviously Lil Lyanna Mormont.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, it's Jorah?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany weeps over him while feeling really badly about friend-zoning him so hard while he was alive.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany, I'ma let you finish, but LYANNA HAD ONE OF THE MOST HEART-WRENCHING \u003cem>GAME OF THRONES\u003c/em> DEATHS OF ALL TIME!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111602\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1020x521.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"327\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1020x521.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-160x82.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-800x409.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-768x392.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1200x613.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1920x981.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you.jpg 1954w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few paces away, Sansa cries over Theon and pins a wolf emblem onto his corpse. After a messy life of not belonging, he's finally an honorary Stark.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111603\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/happy-clap-tears-cry.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"248\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fun fact: The actor who played Theon is pop star Lily Allen's baby brother, Alfie. She wrote a whole song about what a lazy stoner he is:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3bXxo5QFF88\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyway, back to the mass funeral pyres. Dany is having a lot of feels as she Jorah's body burns.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111604\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/friend-zone-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Guess whose body isn't burning up right now? Ghost's! He lives! (Minus an ear.) Phew!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111605\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-1020x769.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"483\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-1020x769.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-160x121.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-800x603.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-768x579.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-1200x905.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost.jpg 1318w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, in the woods somewhere, Nymeria, Arya's dire wolf, continues to mind her business. May that random fire god Melisandre was obsessed with protect them both.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, after spending all day watching their friends burn up, everyone feels really awkward. There's no precedent for how to act after barely surviving a zombie apocalypse. Finally, someone has a genius idea: LET'S ALL GET FIRST-WEEK-AT-COLLEGE WASTED!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111609\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/chug-drink-drunk-2.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"267\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But Dany is too paranoid about people liking Jon more than her to party. In the interest of prematurely recruiting allies, she randomly makes Gendry a lord. Every drunk person in the room thinks, \u003cem>Weird flex, but okay.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a corner, Tormund and Sansa peer pressure Jon into doing a keg stand. At first, Jon resists.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"Vomiting is not celebrating.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"Yes, it is.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Glad that's settled.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon toasts to the Dragon Queen. Dany quickly changes the toast dedication to Arya Stark, \"the hero of Winterfell.\" THAT'S RIGHT! SAY HER NAME! REJOICE IN IT!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111610\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/arya-dancing.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of cute dancing videos of GoT actors, this video of Lyanna Mormont circulated last week...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/rmlundyjr/status/1124439635353133057\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...before she confirmed it wasn't actually her. But we can still pretend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Everyone is tanked, but Tormund most of all. The ratio between wine consumed and wine spilled is about one to one.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111611\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tormund-chug.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111612\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tormund-spill.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111613\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/spill-torm.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">At a nearby table, Jamie, Tyrion and Brienne play a drinking game that involves guessing facts about each other. It doesn't take long for this to get extremely awkward.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion [to Brienne]:\u003c/strong> \"You’re a virgin!!!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Brienne:\u003c/strong> \"...I have to piss.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You know what this uncomfortable exchange needs? A sh*t-faced Tormund, that's what!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Sh*t-Faced Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"We did it! We faced those icy f*cks, looked right into their blue eyes, and here we are! Now which of you cowards shit in my pants?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>No one laughs because they're all lame.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">When Brienne leaves (to piss, I'm guessing), Tormund thinks, \u003cem>This is my chance!\u003c/em> Jamie stops him with a \u003cem>Not so fast, buddy!\u003c/em> Ooo, this love triangle is heating up again! (Which means I get to force you to look at my Photoshop masterpiece once more!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1020x680.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1200x800.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1920x1280.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie.jpg 2000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Cut to Tormund drunk-sobbing about losing the battle for Brienne's heart. \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111615\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tormund-crying.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyone else think this scene has a similar emotional pull as the final scene in \u003cem>Call Me By Your Name\u003c/em>? No? Okay, cool.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111614\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/call-me-by-your-name-crying.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"540\" height=\"210\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">But don't cry for Tormund, Argentina. He ends up snapping out of it within a handful of seconds and hooking up with some townie. Good for him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, Gendry finds Arya and begins to worship her, as he should:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Gendry:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I'm in love you! You're the GOAT! I want you to be my lady 'cause I'm a lord now! Will you marry me?!?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-37158\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/diss.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"267\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sorry. Arya's already married to revenge and murder.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back inside, Brienne is about to turn in for the night and watch a \u003cem>Great British Baking Show\u003c/em> marathon, when a drunk Jamie shows up. He starts complaining about how hot it is and starts taking off his clothes. Very smooth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/gilly-raise-eyebrows-wiig-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"180\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Then he pointedly asks if Brienne likes Tormund. Brienne is out here inspiring grown men to cry into fireplaces and get wildly jealous over her. This is why we are all members of the Brienne of Tarth fan club. (If you're not, please see yourself out.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamie continues complaining about how hot it is and fumbles with undoing the knots of his shirt. Then, he tries taking off Brienne's top!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111616\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/looking-glasses.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"206\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She stops him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106326\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/angry-birds-disappointed-sad-happy-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"350\" height=\"263\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And then does it herself!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106502\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/horny-old-lady-computer-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"338\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Way to take back your agency, Brienne!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamie says, \"I've never slept with a knight before.\" Well, you better buckle up then!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-full wp-image-38275 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_n19y4rrbwl1rrx588o1_500.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"464\" height=\"328\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In another bedroom, Dany finds Jon and asks if he's drunk. He says no, but this stumble says otherwise.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111617\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/got-drunj.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They try to answer a question that's been on both of their minds. No, not which one of them should sit on the Iron Throne. The question of: Can they boink without gagging, now that they know they're aunt and nephew? Only one way to find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After a valiant tongue wrestling effort, they find that incest is not an aphrodisiac after all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107348\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/shrink-sign-language.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"268\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Feeling rejected, Dany's insecurities get the best of her and she demands that Jon never tell anyone who he really is... or else. Jon tries to calm her down with some kumbaya talk, but it doesn't work... at all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"You are my queen. Nothing will change that. And they are my family. We can live together.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong> \"We can. I’ve just told you how.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Essentially, my way or \u003cdel>the highway \u003c/del>I'll have Drogon toast all of y'all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The next day, Arya corners Jon and invites him to a Starks-only meeting.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111618\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/got-gf.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The theme: We hate your girlfriend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Arya and Sansa take turns telling him the progeny of Ned Stark rule and everyone else drools, especially Dany. Before Jon can even get comfortable in the agony of whether to tell them the truth or not, Bran blurts out, \"It's your choice.\" (And that's been this episode's Bran-freaks-everyone-out moment!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon makes them pinky promise that they won't tell anyone and then proceeds to tell them everything, but the camera cuts away before we can witness any \u003cem>So-wait-you-shtooped-your-aunt?!?!\u003c/em> reaction shots!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98857\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/annoyed-kim.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"485\" height=\"275\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The following day, Clegane and Arya run into each other on the road. They're both heading back to King's Landing to settle some unfinished business (my theory: Clegane will have a final battle with his brother, the Mountain, and Arya is gonna slip one of her masks on and try to kill Cersei). They both agree they don't plan on ever coming back to Winterfell. (Another theory, which I hope isn't true: they're both going to die in the next two episodes.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97258\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/britney-sad-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Arya and Clegane aren't the only ones leaving town; almost everyone is heading south to tell Cersei that she's mean. Tormund bids Jon adieu and takes Ghost with him. (Jon, be a better dire wolf parent! You can't just keep abandoning him like this!) Jon also says goodbye to Sam, who's still alive somehow and also managed to get his girlfriend pregnant again. Check out his Yup-I-did-the-sex-again face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111619\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/yup-i-did-the-sex.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before Tyrion rides off, he tries to find out why Sansa is acting super weird and staring off into the distance. Internally, Sansa thinks to herself: \u003cem>Don't say it don't say it don't say it.\u003c/em> Externally, Sansa says: \u003cem>So here are my top 10 reasons why I hate Dany, who's Jon's aunt by the way.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111620\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/gwen-stefani-oops.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As the fleet makes its way south, Dany and Drogon fly beside Rhaegal, who is healing after the battle and learning how to fly again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-62786\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/02/awww.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Out of nowhere, an arrow punctures Rhaegal's chest! And wing! And throat! And Rhaegal gurgles all the way down to a watery death!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>WHAT DID I SAY, \u003cem>GOT\u003c/em> WRITERS?!?!?!?!?!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I am beside myself. I...can't.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111621\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/feels-waves-emotional.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The arrow came from stupid Euron Greyjoy! And he's not done being a dick. He obliterates Dany's entire fleet too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111622\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/explode-ship-arrow-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, y'all thought this was just a sleepy hangover episode?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Hold on. Faxing Arya so she can put Euron's name on her kill list.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in King's Landing, Euron tells Cersei about murdering Rhaegal. Her sociopathic response: \"That must've been glorious.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Me to no one:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111625\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/im-going-to-have-to-kill-her.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To make matters worse, Euron managed to capture Missendei and now she's Cersei's prisoner. This is not going to end well.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109224\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/02/prince-smh.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"418\" height=\"480\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Dany vows to obliterate King's Landing, civilians and all. After failing to talk her down, Lord Varys tells Tyrion that Cersei is feeling herself too much and showing the signs of a tyrant. He suggests they put their support behind Jon because he's a man and he's likable and he's someone you could have a beer with. Hmm, this all sounds oddly familiar...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back in Winterfell, Jamie's complicated feelings for Cersei drive him out of Brienne's bed and on the road back to King's Landing. Brienne catches him and begs him to stay.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Brienne:\u003c/strong> \"You don’t need to die with her. Stay here. Stay with me. Please. Stay.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jamie:\u003c/strong> \"She’s hateful and so am I.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He flips her the deuces and trots off, leaving Brienne to rain tears and snot everywhere. She's mourning their cute romance, but also the good side of him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106655\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/sad-wilfred-doctor-who-crying-old-man-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"147\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the castle walls of King's Landing, Dany and co. have a stand-off with Cersie and co. Tyrion and Cersei's creepy assistant try bargaining.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tyrion: \u003c/strong>\u003cem>Surrender or else general bad things will happen.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Cersei's Creepy Assistant:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Surrender or else general bad things will happen AND Cersei will throw Dany's BFF, Missandei, to her death right now.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Ok then!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Tyrion tries his Plan B.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, Cersei! Let's skip the whole battle thing. You want your unborn child to live, right?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I\u003c/em> \u003cem>couldn't give a sh*t.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The Mountain chops off Missendei's head and both her head and body plummet off the castle wall right in front of Dany and Grey Worm. This means war.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111627\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-means-war-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 3 Recap: Great Balls of Fire\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Need someone to process ALL OF THAT with? This recap has your back!","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1557127014,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":true,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":93,"wordCount":1956},"headData":{"title":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 4 Recap: Drunk In Love | KQED","description":"Need someone to process ALL OF THAT with? This recap has your back!","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"111563 https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/?p=111563","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2019/05/06/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-4-recap-drunk-in-love/","disqusTitle":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 4 Recap: Drunk In Love","path":"/pop/111563/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-4-recap-drunk-in-love","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, all hell broke loose.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This Lyanna Mormont moment captures the essence of the Battle of Winterfell:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111414\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/lyanna-mormont-battle-of-winterfell.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone's favorite middle schooler ended up dying, along with Jorah, Melisandre, pretty much all the Dothraki, Theon and some other randos.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111424\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-beer.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, and ARYA MOTHER F*CKING STARK SINGLE-HANDEDLY KILLED THE NIGHT KING! If you missed that moment or just want to see it again, here it is, complete with added celebratory scenes from \u003cem>The Truman Show\u003c/em> because I'm random.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"singleTwitterStatus","attributes":{"named":{"id":"1122712859421499393"},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>Now with the existential threat of the Night King and his dead army gone, what in the world is going to happen next? Let's find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's the morning after the Battle of Winterfell. The camera slowly pans up the body of a fallen hero. The MVP. It's obviously Lil Lyanna Mormont.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, it's Jorah?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany weeps over him while feeling really badly about friend-zoning him so hard while he was alive.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany, I'ma let you finish, but LYANNA HAD ONE OF THE MOST HEART-WRENCHING \u003cem>GAME OF THRONES\u003c/em> DEATHS OF ALL TIME!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111602\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1020x521.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"327\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1020x521.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-160x82.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-800x409.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-768x392.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1200x613.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1920x981.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you.jpg 1954w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few paces away, Sansa cries over Theon and pins a wolf emblem onto his corpse. After a messy life of not belonging, he's finally an honorary Stark.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111603\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/happy-clap-tears-cry.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"248\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fun fact: The actor who played Theon is pop star Lily Allen's baby brother, Alfie. She wrote a whole song about what a lazy stoner he is:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/3bXxo5QFF88'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/3bXxo5QFF88'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Anyway, back to the mass funeral pyres. Dany is having a lot of feels as she Jorah's body burns.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111604\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/friend-zone-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Guess whose body isn't burning up right now? Ghost's! He lives! (Minus an ear.) Phew!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111605\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-1020x769.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"483\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-1020x769.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-160x121.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-800x603.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-768x579.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-1200x905.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost.jpg 1318w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, in the woods somewhere, Nymeria, Arya's dire wolf, continues to mind her business. May that random fire god Melisandre was obsessed with protect them both.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, after spending all day watching their friends burn up, everyone feels really awkward. There's no precedent for how to act after barely surviving a zombie apocalypse. Finally, someone has a genius idea: LET'S ALL GET FIRST-WEEK-AT-COLLEGE WASTED!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111609\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/chug-drink-drunk-2.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"267\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But Dany is too paranoid about people liking Jon more than her to party. In the interest of prematurely recruiting allies, she randomly makes Gendry a lord. Every drunk person in the room thinks, \u003cem>Weird flex, but okay.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a corner, Tormund and Sansa peer pressure Jon into doing a keg stand. At first, Jon resists.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"Vomiting is not celebrating.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"Yes, it is.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Glad that's settled.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon toasts to the Dragon Queen. Dany quickly changes the toast dedication to Arya Stark, \"the hero of Winterfell.\" THAT'S RIGHT! SAY HER NAME! REJOICE IN IT!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111610\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/arya-dancing.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of cute dancing videos of GoT actors, this video of Lyanna Mormont circulated last week...\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"singleTwitterStatus","attributes":{"named":{"id":"1124439635353133057"},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>...before she confirmed it wasn't actually her. But we can still pretend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Everyone is tanked, but Tormund most of all. The ratio between wine consumed and wine spilled is about one to one.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111611\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tormund-chug.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111612\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tormund-spill.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111613\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/spill-torm.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">At a nearby table, Jamie, Tyrion and Brienne play a drinking game that involves guessing facts about each other. It doesn't take long for this to get extremely awkward.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion [to Brienne]:\u003c/strong> \"You’re a virgin!!!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Brienne:\u003c/strong> \"...I have to piss.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You know what this uncomfortable exchange needs? A sh*t-faced Tormund, that's what!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Sh*t-Faced Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"We did it! We faced those icy f*cks, looked right into their blue eyes, and here we are! Now which of you cowards shit in my pants?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>No one laughs because they're all lame.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">When Brienne leaves (to piss, I'm guessing), Tormund thinks, \u003cem>This is my chance!\u003c/em> Jamie stops him with a \u003cem>Not so fast, buddy!\u003c/em> Ooo, this love triangle is heating up again! (Which means I get to force you to look at my Photoshop masterpiece once more!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1020x680.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1200x800.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1920x1280.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie.jpg 2000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Cut to Tormund drunk-sobbing about losing the battle for Brienne's heart. \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111615\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tormund-crying.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyone else think this scene has a similar emotional pull as the final scene in \u003cem>Call Me By Your Name\u003c/em>? No? Okay, cool.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111614\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/call-me-by-your-name-crying.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"540\" height=\"210\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">But don't cry for Tormund, Argentina. He ends up snapping out of it within a handful of seconds and hooking up with some townie. Good for him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, Gendry finds Arya and begins to worship her, as he should:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Gendry:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I'm in love you! You're the GOAT! I want you to be my lady 'cause I'm a lord now! Will you marry me?!?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-37158\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/diss.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"267\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sorry. Arya's already married to revenge and murder.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back inside, Brienne is about to turn in for the night and watch a \u003cem>Great British Baking Show\u003c/em> marathon, when a drunk Jamie shows up. He starts complaining about how hot it is and starts taking off his clothes. Very smooth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/gilly-raise-eyebrows-wiig-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"180\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Then he pointedly asks if Brienne likes Tormund. Brienne is out here inspiring grown men to cry into fireplaces and get wildly jealous over her. This is why we are all members of the Brienne of Tarth fan club. (If you're not, please see yourself out.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamie continues complaining about how hot it is and fumbles with undoing the knots of his shirt. Then, he tries taking off Brienne's top!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111616\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/looking-glasses.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"206\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She stops him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106326\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/angry-birds-disappointed-sad-happy-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"350\" height=\"263\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And then does it herself!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106502\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/horny-old-lady-computer-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"338\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Way to take back your agency, Brienne!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamie says, \"I've never slept with a knight before.\" Well, you better buckle up then!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-full wp-image-38275 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_n19y4rrbwl1rrx588o1_500.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"464\" height=\"328\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In another bedroom, Dany finds Jon and asks if he's drunk. He says no, but this stumble says otherwise.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111617\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/got-drunj.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They try to answer a question that's been on both of their minds. No, not which one of them should sit on the Iron Throne. The question of: Can they boink without gagging, now that they know they're aunt and nephew? Only one way to find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After a valiant tongue wrestling effort, they find that incest is not an aphrodisiac after all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107348\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/shrink-sign-language.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"268\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Feeling rejected, Dany's insecurities get the best of her and she demands that Jon never tell anyone who he really is... or else. Jon tries to calm her down with some kumbaya talk, but it doesn't work... at all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"You are my queen. Nothing will change that. And they are my family. We can live together.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong> \"We can. I’ve just told you how.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Essentially, my way or \u003cdel>the highway \u003c/del>I'll have Drogon toast all of y'all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The next day, Arya corners Jon and invites him to a Starks-only meeting.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111618\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/got-gf.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The theme: We hate your girlfriend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Arya and Sansa take turns telling him the progeny of Ned Stark rule and everyone else drools, especially Dany. Before Jon can even get comfortable in the agony of whether to tell them the truth or not, Bran blurts out, \"It's your choice.\" (And that's been this episode's Bran-freaks-everyone-out moment!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon makes them pinky promise that they won't tell anyone and then proceeds to tell them everything, but the camera cuts away before we can witness any \u003cem>So-wait-you-shtooped-your-aunt?!?!\u003c/em> reaction shots!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98857\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/annoyed-kim.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"485\" height=\"275\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The following day, Clegane and Arya run into each other on the road. They're both heading back to King's Landing to settle some unfinished business (my theory: Clegane will have a final battle with his brother, the Mountain, and Arya is gonna slip one of her masks on and try to kill Cersei). They both agree they don't plan on ever coming back to Winterfell. (Another theory, which I hope isn't true: they're both going to die in the next two episodes.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97258\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/britney-sad-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Arya and Clegane aren't the only ones leaving town; almost everyone is heading south to tell Cersei that she's mean. Tormund bids Jon adieu and takes Ghost with him. (Jon, be a better dire wolf parent! You can't just keep abandoning him like this!) Jon also says goodbye to Sam, who's still alive somehow and also managed to get his girlfriend pregnant again. Check out his Yup-I-did-the-sex-again face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111619\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/yup-i-did-the-sex.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before Tyrion rides off, he tries to find out why Sansa is acting super weird and staring off into the distance. Internally, Sansa thinks to herself: \u003cem>Don't say it don't say it don't say it.\u003c/em> Externally, Sansa says: \u003cem>So here are my top 10 reasons why I hate Dany, who's Jon's aunt by the way.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111620\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/gwen-stefani-oops.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As the fleet makes its way south, Dany and Drogon fly beside Rhaegal, who is healing after the battle and learning how to fly again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-62786\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/02/awww.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Out of nowhere, an arrow punctures Rhaegal's chest! And wing! And throat! And Rhaegal gurgles all the way down to a watery death!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>WHAT DID I SAY, \u003cem>GOT\u003c/em> WRITERS?!?!?!?!?!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I am beside myself. I...can't.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111621\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/feels-waves-emotional.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The arrow came from stupid Euron Greyjoy! And he's not done being a dick. He obliterates Dany's entire fleet too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111622\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/explode-ship-arrow-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, y'all thought this was just a sleepy hangover episode?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Hold on. Faxing Arya so she can put Euron's name on her kill list.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in King's Landing, Euron tells Cersei about murdering Rhaegal. Her sociopathic response: \"That must've been glorious.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Me to no one:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111625\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/im-going-to-have-to-kill-her.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To make matters worse, Euron managed to capture Missendei and now she's Cersei's prisoner. This is not going to end well.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109224\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/02/prince-smh.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"418\" height=\"480\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Dany vows to obliterate King's Landing, civilians and all. After failing to talk her down, Lord Varys tells Tyrion that Cersei is feeling herself too much and showing the signs of a tyrant. He suggests they put their support behind Jon because he's a man and he's likable and he's someone you could have a beer with. Hmm, this all sounds oddly familiar...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back in Winterfell, Jamie's complicated feelings for Cersei drive him out of Brienne's bed and on the road back to King's Landing. Brienne catches him and begs him to stay.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Brienne:\u003c/strong> \"You don’t need to die with her. Stay here. Stay with me. Please. Stay.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jamie:\u003c/strong> \"She’s hateful and so am I.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He flips her the deuces and trots off, leaving Brienne to rain tears and snot everywhere. She's mourning their cute romance, but also the good side of him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106655\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/sad-wilfred-doctor-who-crying-old-man-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"147\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the castle walls of King's Landing, Dany and co. have a stand-off with Cersie and co. Tyrion and Cersei's creepy assistant try bargaining.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tyrion: \u003c/strong>\u003cem>Surrender or else general bad things will happen.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Cersei's Creepy Assistant:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Surrender or else general bad things will happen AND Cersei will throw Dany's BFF, Missandei, to her death right now.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Ok then!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Tyrion tries his Plan B.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, Cersei! Let's skip the whole battle thing. You want your unborn child to live, right?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I\u003c/em> \u003cem>couldn't give a sh*t.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The Mountain chops off Missendei's head and both her head and body plummet off the castle wall right in front of Dany and Grey Worm. This means war.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111627\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-means-war-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 3 Recap: Great Balls of Fire\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/pop/111563/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-4-recap-drunk-in-love","authors":["27"],"categories":["pop_3"],"tags":["pop_3341","pop_73","pop_8"],"featImg":"pop_111630","label":"pop"},"pop_111543":{"type":"posts","id":"pop_111543","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"pop","id":"111543","score":null,"sort":[1556780407000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"but-her-hieroglyphs-meet-the-cersei-of-ancient-egypt","title":"But Her Hieroglyphs: Meet The Cersei Of Ancient Egypt","publishDate":1556780407,"format":"audio","headTitle":"KQED Pop | KQED Arts","labelTerm":{"site":"pop"},"content":"\u003cp>This week, we're telling the story of a bearded female Egyptian Pharaoh some salty dudes didn't want us to know about.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111555\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/cher-pharaoh.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We'll also be unpacking the recent wave of stars hating on critics (et tu, Lizzo?).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111551\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/lizzo-fire-flute.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"196\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And celebrating a burkini-wearing model in \u003cem>Sports Illustrated\u003c/em>, the career of John Singleton and the \"Everybody Mad\" part of Beyoncé's \u003cem>Homecoming\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111552\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/everybody-mad-beyonce.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"268\" height=\"268\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Listen to hear all about it!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[audio src=\"https://www.kqed.org/.stream/anon/radio/thecooler/2019/05/HerHieroglyphs.mp3\" title=\"But Her Hieroglyphs: Meet The Cersei Of Ancient Egypt\" program=\"The Cooler\" image=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/cersei-egypt-beard-pharaoh.jpg\"]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/id1041117499\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Subscribe and rate us five stars in iTunes\u003c/a>! And find us on \u003ca href=\"https://www.facebook.com/KQED-Pop-336039936485067/timeline/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Facebook\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/kqedpop\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Twitter\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"We tell the story of a bearded female Egyptian Pharaoh some salty dudes didn't want us to know about. We'll also be unpacking the recent wave of stars hating on critics (et tu, Lizzo?) and celebrating a burkini-wearing model in Sports Illustrated and the career of John Singleton.\r\n","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1556821051,"stats":{"hasAudio":true,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":10,"wordCount":137},"headData":{"title":"But Her Hieroglyphs: Meet The Cersei Of Ancient Egypt | KQED","description":"We tell the story of a bearded female Egyptian Pharaoh some salty dudes didn't want us to know about. We'll also be unpacking the recent wave of stars hating on critics (et tu, Lizzo?) and celebrating a burkini-wearing model in Sports Illustrated and the career of John Singleton.\r\n","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"111543 https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/?p=111543","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2019/05/02/but-her-hieroglyphs-meet-the-cersei-of-ancient-egypt/","disqusTitle":"But Her Hieroglyphs: Meet The Cersei Of Ancient Egypt","audioTrackLength":2221,"path":"/pop/111543/but-her-hieroglyphs-meet-the-cersei-of-ancient-egypt","audioUrl":"https://www.kqed.org/.stream/anon/radio/thecooler/2019/05/HerHieroglyphs.mp3","audioDuration":2304000,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>This week, we're telling the story of a bearded female Egyptian Pharaoh some salty dudes didn't want us to know about.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111555\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/cher-pharaoh.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We'll also be unpacking the recent wave of stars hating on critics (et tu, Lizzo?).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111551\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/lizzo-fire-flute.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"196\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And celebrating a burkini-wearing model in \u003cem>Sports Illustrated\u003c/em>, the career of John Singleton and the \"Everybody Mad\" part of Beyoncé's \u003cem>Homecoming\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111552\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/everybody-mad-beyonce.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"268\" height=\"268\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Listen to hear all about it!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"audio","attributes":{"named":{"src":"https://www.kqed.org/.stream/anon/radio/thecooler/2019/05/HerHieroglyphs.mp3","title":"But Her Hieroglyphs: Meet The Cersei Of Ancient Egypt","program":"The Cooler","image":"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/cersei-egypt-beard-pharaoh.jpg","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/id1041117499\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Subscribe and rate us five stars in iTunes\u003c/a>! And find us on \u003ca href=\"https://www.facebook.com/KQED-Pop-336039936485067/timeline/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Facebook\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/kqedpop\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Twitter\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/pop/111543/but-her-hieroglyphs-meet-the-cersei-of-ancient-egypt","authors":["27"],"categories":["pop_2793"],"tags":["pop_1680","pop_465","pop_3341","pop_73","pop_605","pop_3365","pop_2859"],"featImg":"pop_111560","label":"pop"},"pop_111406":{"type":"posts","id":"pop_111406","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"pop","id":"111406","score":null,"sort":[1556519177000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire","title":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 3 Recap: Great Balls Of Fire","publishDate":1556519177,"format":"standard","headTitle":"KQED Pop | KQED Arts","labelTerm":{"site":"pop"},"content":"\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, the Brienne-Jamie-Tormund love triangle heated up in a major way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/1120437719061225472\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But that trio's got nothing on the steaminess that went on between Arya and Gendry.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111179\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/arya-dtf.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109446\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/02/fans-self.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"271\" height=\"251\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany made this \"per my last email\" face, which could also be read as an \"If you weren't my boyfriend's sister, I would turn you into a Lunchable for my dragons\" face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111407\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-1020x572.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"359\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-1020x572.jpeg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-160x90.jpeg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-800x448.jpeg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-768x431.jpeg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q.jpeg 1024w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of said boyfriend, he finally told Dany that they're related, inspiring an official change to their Facebook relationship status.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111181\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"612\" height=\"320\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320.jpg 612w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320-160x84.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 612px) 100vw, 612px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, outside of Winterfell, the Night King prepared to annihilate all of our faves by jamming to some Drake.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/1122653091709349889\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Who will survive the Battle of Winterfell, which took 55 days to film, cost $15 million to produce and is the longest battle sequence in film and television history? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone stands at attention, waiting for things to go down. Winterfell has the same \u003cem>Welp-here-goes-nothing!\u003c/em> energy as the moment Thelma and Louise clasp hands and drive off a cliff.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111410\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/thelma-louise-hands-cliff.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Out of the darkness, a figure approaches. Is it the Night King walking up to say, \u003cem>Hey, y'all. Let's not, actually. Sorry about all the terrorism.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nope! It's Melisandre, the fire witch!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xqVMhN-Yit4\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I still have not forgiven her for toasting little Scarface Shireen!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">And neither has Sir Davos, who mean-mugs her so intensely, Melisandre says, \"There’s no need to execute me, Sir Davos. I’ll be dead before the dawn.\" Works for me!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The Battle of Winterfell begins and, from what I can see (which is not much *smashes brightness button on laptop*), things don't start off promisingly. Jorah and the Dothraki head out and everyone watches in horror as their flames are snuffed out as easily as middle schoolers squishing lightning bugs. Horses run back to Winterfell, all the way spooked. Jorah follows with a look that says, \u003cem>Yeah, we're f*cked. \u003c/em>Everyone poops in their pants just a little bit.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">A tsunami of zombies overwhelms our faves. Brienne screams for everyone to stand their ground, but soon she's just screaming in general. A group of zombies try to eat her face off, but Jamie swoops in with an assist. 15 minutes in and my eye is already twitching from the stress.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111281\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eye-twitch-mo-the-simpsons.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"284\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Up in the sky, Dany and Jon ride Drogon and Rhaegal and try to help, but there's a snow storm. The Al Roker of Westeros delivers this sobering forecast for the evening: 100% chance of blood-covered snow, 0% visibility, 1% chance of survival.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">On the wall, Arya and Sansa share a cute sister moment.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>You used to annoy the crap out of me, but you're pretty cool this season, so take this dagger and head down to the crypt. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \"I don’t know how to use it.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"Stick them with the pointy end.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">First of all, LOL.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Second of all, that's what Jon told Arya in their first combat lesson.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111436\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-1020x574.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-1200x675.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Oof, here come the tears.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">But there's no time for emotions right now! Sam is about to get his eye poked out! Thankfully, that Night Watch dude none of us know by name (it's apparently Eddison Tollett) saves him. His reward: a spear through the back of his skull. Pour one out for What's His Face, everyone!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111411\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Instead of avenging his savior and friend, Sam runs.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96472\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mary-kate-olsen-eye-roll-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"358\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Am I the only one screaming \"WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! OH, NO!!! OMG!\" to myself? Didn't think so.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">One of my \"WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! OH, NO!!! OMG!\" outbursts comes when Dany and Jon collide on their dragons because of the low visibility! I've said it in every other recap and I'll say it again. Dear \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> writers,\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, on the ground, things aren't going much better. Everyone decides to fall back. While Clegane is attempting to run back to safety, a zombie tries to take him out, but Arya's fiery arrow is too quick. I love the twisted relationship these two have built.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-20661\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey.gif 200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-32x32.gif 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-64x64.gif 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-96x96.gif 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-128x128.gif 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-75x75.gif 75w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 200px) 100vw, 200px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The new game plan: light the trenches to keep the dead at bay. The only problem is that the dragons are busy Crash Test Dummy-ing it up in the sky and fiery arrows are being extinguished by the snow and wind! Enter Melisandre, who takes her sweet ass time walking up to the trenches. C'mon, girl, put some pep in your step!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111437\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/must-go-faster.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"152\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Melisandre says, \"Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena\" over and over again, but nothing is happening! The zombies are just about to snack on her head when—KAPOW!—the trenches explode with fire. Phew! Thanks for saving literally everyone, Melisandre, but I still have my eye on you.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111438\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/lucille-arrested-look-eye.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"289\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Down in the crypt, Tyrion pretends to want to be up there getting his butt kicked instead of hanging with ladies and babies, drinking his weight in wine.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \"If I was out there right now...\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \"You’d die.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Another sick comeback! Arya kills with weapons. Sansa kills with words. Be safe, you wise-cracking legend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside by the creepy crying tree, Theon is all set to protect Bran.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Theon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, sorry about taking over Winterfell that one time and generally being a prick.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Bran:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>No worries! BRB!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Theon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Wait, what? This is not a great time for a nap!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Bran's eyes go white and his consciousness goes on a little field trip as a conspiracy of ravens. He immediately finds the Night King, who extends his bad manicure toward the army of the dead, instructing them to throw their bodies on the burning trenches until a bridge can form. (What a cozy show this is.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It doesn't take long for the zombies to breach the fire and start scaling Winterfell's walls. Why didn't the home team embed dragon glass shards into all the exterior walls? That would've saved us all a lot of grief, just saying.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a corner, Clegane stands frozen. Not a great moment to succumb to PTSD, my dude. Look alive (or else you literally won't be). Nearby, Sam cries, until someone saves him again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-42283\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/lc-eyeroll-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"375\" height=\"271\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the courtyard, we get a lingering shot of Lil Lyanna Mormont. I have a bad feeling about this....\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sure enough, a huge dead giant bursts through the gate and smacks her out of the way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-16987\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2015/07/luke-noooo.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"620\" height=\"331\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2015/07/luke-noooo.jpeg 620w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2015/07/luke-noooo-400x214.jpeg 400w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 620px) 100vw, 620px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Elsewhere, Arya crowd-surfs down a stairwell full of dead folk. What a rock star. But let's not celebrate too soon; she gets her head smacked against a stone wall.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111413\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/kermit-nervous.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"264\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Clegane is still PTSD-ing the battle away in a corner.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Eye Patch Dude:\u003c/strong> \"Clegane, we need you!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Clegane:\u003c/strong> \"F*ck off! We can’t beat them. Can’t you see that, you stupid whore?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48702\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/CherylLaugh.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then, Eye Patch Dude points to Arya, who's in the middle of falling off the roof, and says, \"Tell \u003cem>her\u003c/em> that.\" Clegane snaps out of it because Arya is the GOAT of \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em> and we can't have her dying halfway through this episode (...or ever).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Lil Lyanna survived the giant's smack! I think she speaks for all of us when she says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111414\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/lyanna-mormont-battle-of-winterfell.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Lil Lyanna runs up on the giant, who doesn't waste time snatching her up and crushing her skeleton, but not before she stabs him right in his blue contact lens!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-20668\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/3c66593df89a1e418a72dbca059c85fe.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"252\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">What a legend. All flags better be at half mast tomorrow.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In the sky, Viserion tries to ice blast his mom. Maybe he's mad about this whole new stepdad thing?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back inside Winterfell, Arya is trying to avoid hella zombies in the library from hell. She can't really see because of her concussion. It's a good thing she was blind that one season, huh? Arya throws a book as a diversion and tries to hustle out of there, only to run into a dead woman who is quickly made even more dead.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111415\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/arya-zombie-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If anyone survives this battle, there's going to be a whole lot of laundry and cleaning up to do. Getting it all done might take as long as it took Dany to let her dragons out of that dark dungeon a couple of years ago. (Yes, I still have a lot of feelings about that.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Unfortunately, Arya is still not in the clear. Zombies are all over her when Eye Patch Dude saves the day. Clegane snatches Arya up like an In-N-Out to-go order and hauls her out of there.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111416\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/to-go-arya-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They make it to a safe room, where Eye Patch Dude dies from his gazillion stab wounds.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111441\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-rbg.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Melisandre is randomly in the shadows and asks Arya, \"What do we say to the god of Death?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Arya quickly responds with: \"Not today!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106890\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/not-today-satan.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"281\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside, the Night King swoops down and makes Viserion ice blast Winterfell. Um, excuse me, we just dealt with our emotions about the Notre Dame. Can we please keep these historic structures sound?!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon clearly feels the same way because he shows up and things quickly turn into Dragon Mortal Kombat. There's scratching! There's pyromania! There's neck biting! Dany shows up and flings the Night King right off Viserion.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111417\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/night-king-got-bye.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon crash lands and, from the looks of it, Rhaegal is either really hurt or dead. WHAT DID I SAY, \u003cem>GAME OF THRONES\u003c/em> WRITERS?!?!?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Dany flies down and finds the Ice King just standing there like a weirdo. She lights his ass up! Party time!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106880\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/troll-dance-party.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"372\" height=\"254\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, hold up. He's still alive!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111418\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Oh-hai-night-king-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon tries to sneak up on him, but the Night King uses his bad manicure again to revive all the humans who've died tonight. And not just the ones outside the gates either. Little Lyanna wakes up with blue contacts! So does What's His Butt from the Night Watch! And presumably Eye Patch Dude too! In this moment, the message to Jon is clear:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111419\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/run-forrest-run.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, Sam's girlfriend is chilling in the crypt when a skeletal hand shoots out of one of the tombs! Good thing Sansa has that dagger, right? \u003cspan class=\"s1\">😫😫😫😫😫😫\u003c/span> Everyone runs around as the dead gobble up women and children. THIS SHOW, MY GOD!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside by the tree, Theon is lighting hoes up. Bran is still out of office.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111420\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/ron-harry-potter-confused.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"214\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Just when it looks like Jon is about to meet his end on the battlefield, Dany rolls up.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111421\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/GET-IN-LOSER-GOT.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Ack! A f*ckton of zombies jump all over Drogon and stab him all over his body! What an unforced error on Dany's part! I am livid!!!! This is what happens when you get the hots for your nephew! Drogon flies away without Dany and desperately tries shaking the zombies off. I can't watch!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98856\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/wendy-cant.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"148\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Now it's Dany's turn to almost die. Jorah saves her in the nick of time. She's still not gonna sleep with you, but thanks for looking out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back inside Winterfell, Sam needs saving again. I’m sorry to say this, but we should just let him die at this point, right? He doesn’t have the range.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Down in the crypt, the words of Antoine Dodson's viral clip echo against the wall: \"Hide yo' kids, hide yo' wife.\" Sansa and Tyrion are doing just that behind a tomb. Piano keys tinkle as Tyrion kisses Sansa’s hand, perhaps for the last time, as they take out their daggers. Sansa is like, \u003cem>Welp, let’s go re-kill some of my ancestors and see what happens. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, Theon is still doing his best to guard Bran, who is still catching some zzz's or whatever. Look alive, girl!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111422\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/come-on-now-wake-up-bad-girls-club.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"450\" height=\"286\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Time to check in with Sam again. Oh, he's STILL just sitting around and crying. How is he still alive??????? I think he should either try to help in some way or just let Lil Lyanna munch his face off.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In It's-about-time! news: Bran finally signs back onto AOL Instant Messenger.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111423\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/aol-dialup-connecting.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"302\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As the Night King and his homies approach, Bran looks at Theon and says, \"You're a good man. Thank you.\" Weak toast! This guy just slaughtered hundreds of zombies over many hours for you and that's all you got? For Theon, it seems to be enough though. He lets a tear fall before charging at the Night King and quickly getting murdered.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111424\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-beer.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In the courtyard, Viserion (or is it a dead Rhaegal or Drogon, who can tell?!) lets all those stepdaddy issues out by relentlessly blasting Jon with ice fire. Meanwhile, outside the gates, Jorah is getting shish-kebab-ed left and right, while Dany stands there thinking, \u003cem>Wow, this is really bad.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back at the tree, Bran gives the Night King a dose of what he does best: creepily holding eye contact for way too long. The Night King is thorougly weirded out and decides to put an end to this staring contest. He reaches for his weapon and then ARYA MOTHER F*CKING STARK LEAPS OUT OF NOWHERE. THE NIGHT KING CHOKES HER AND SHE LETS HER DAGGER FALL, ONLY TO STAB HIM FROM BELOW LIKE SHE PRACTICED WITH BRIENNE THAT ONE TIME. THE NIGHT KING BURSTS INTO A MILLION ICE PARTICLES, AS DO ALL OF HIS FRIENDS! AND YES, THE REST OF THIS RECAP WILL BE IN ALL CAPS BECAUSE YAAAAAAS!!!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-7660\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mrual4lQ0P1qz4rgp.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"195\" height=\"130\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107386\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/excited-arrested-development.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"275\" height=\"155\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107563\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/excited-kid.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"322\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96625\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yass-beyonce.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101826\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/excited.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-43532\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/sailor-moon-excited-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"391\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-55597\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/12/yass-party.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>WHO RUN THE WORLD? GIRLS, BUT SPECIFICALLY ARYA.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19942\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/giphy-2.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"230\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I CREATED A LITTLE VIDEO OF WHAT THE REACTION AROUND THE WORLD WAS TO ARYA SLAYING THE NIGHT KING:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/1122712859421499393\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>OH, BTW, JORAH TOTALLY DIED. LATER, BRO! YOU SEEMED CHILL. AS DANY CRIES OVER HIS BODY, A DRAGON (THE LAST LIVING?) CUDDLES HER.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19941\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/1361.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"350\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">AS THE SUN COMES UP, MELISANDRE'S PROPHECY COMES TRUE AS SHE TAKES OFF HER YOUTH CRYSTAL, WALKS TOWARD THE HORIZON, TURNS INTO THAT OLD LADY FROM \u003cem>TITANIC\u003c/em> AND DIES. THANKS FOR NOT BEING TOTALLY AWFUL IN THE END.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111440\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-younger.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"385\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, I can't end this recap without paying homage to our fallen heroes. Click play on the abused puppy Sarah McLachlan song below and scroll down through the faces we will never see again (*chokes back sob*):\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SiylvmFI_8\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111429\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"358\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM.png 944w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM-800x447.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM-768x430.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111425\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jorah-got.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"701\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jorah-got.jpg 480w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jorah-got-160x234.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 480px) 100vw, 480px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111426\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-1020x1022.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"641\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-1020x1022.jpeg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-160x160.jpeg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-800x801.jpeg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-768x769.jpeg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-1198x1200.jpeg 1198w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre.jpeg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111427\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eddison-wall-got.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"316\" height=\"490\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eddison-wall-got.png 316w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eddison-wall-got-160x248.png 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 316px) 100vw, 316px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111428\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/beric-got.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"700\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/beric-got.jpg 500w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/beric-got-160x224.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111430\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/theon-grejoy.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"636\" height=\"720\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/theon-grejoy.jpg 636w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/theon-grejoy-160x181.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 636px) 100vw, 636px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Need someone to process ALL OF THAT with? This recap has your back!","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1556521721,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":true,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":86,"wordCount":2488},"headData":{"title":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 3 Recap: Great Balls Of Fire | KQED","description":"Need someone to process ALL OF THAT with? This recap has your back!","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"111406 https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/?p=111406","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2019/04/28/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire/","disqusTitle":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 3 Recap: Great Balls Of Fire","path":"/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, the Brienne-Jamie-Tormund love triangle heated up in a major way.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"singleTwitterStatus","attributes":{"named":{"id":"1120437719061225472"},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>But that trio's got nothing on the steaminess that went on between Arya and Gendry.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111179\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/arya-dtf.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109446\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/02/fans-self.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"271\" height=\"251\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany made this \"per my last email\" face, which could also be read as an \"If you weren't my boyfriend's sister, I would turn you into a Lunchable for my dragons\" face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111407\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-1020x572.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"359\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-1020x572.jpeg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-160x90.jpeg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-800x448.jpeg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-768x431.jpeg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q.jpeg 1024w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of said boyfriend, he finally told Dany that they're related, inspiring an official change to their Facebook relationship status.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111181\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"612\" height=\"320\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320.jpg 612w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320-160x84.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 612px) 100vw, 612px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, outside of Winterfell, the Night King prepared to annihilate all of our faves by jamming to some Drake.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"singleTwitterStatus","attributes":{"named":{"id":"1122653091709349889"},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>Who will survive the Battle of Winterfell, which took 55 days to film, cost $15 million to produce and is the longest battle sequence in film and television history? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone stands at attention, waiting for things to go down. Winterfell has the same \u003cem>Welp-here-goes-nothing!\u003c/em> energy as the moment Thelma and Louise clasp hands and drive off a cliff.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111410\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/thelma-louise-hands-cliff.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Out of the darkness, a figure approaches. Is it the Night King walking up to say, \u003cem>Hey, y'all. Let's not, actually. Sorry about all the terrorism.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nope! It's Melisandre, the fire witch!\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/xqVMhN-Yit4'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/xqVMhN-Yit4'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>I still have not forgiven her for toasting little Scarface Shireen!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">And neither has Sir Davos, who mean-mugs her so intensely, Melisandre says, \"There’s no need to execute me, Sir Davos. I’ll be dead before the dawn.\" Works for me!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The Battle of Winterfell begins and, from what I can see (which is not much *smashes brightness button on laptop*), things don't start off promisingly. Jorah and the Dothraki head out and everyone watches in horror as their flames are snuffed out as easily as middle schoolers squishing lightning bugs. Horses run back to Winterfell, all the way spooked. Jorah follows with a look that says, \u003cem>Yeah, we're f*cked. \u003c/em>Everyone poops in their pants just a little bit.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">A tsunami of zombies overwhelms our faves. Brienne screams for everyone to stand their ground, but soon she's just screaming in general. A group of zombies try to eat her face off, but Jamie swoops in with an assist. 15 minutes in and my eye is already twitching from the stress.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111281\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eye-twitch-mo-the-simpsons.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"284\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Up in the sky, Dany and Jon ride Drogon and Rhaegal and try to help, but there's a snow storm. The Al Roker of Westeros delivers this sobering forecast for the evening: 100% chance of blood-covered snow, 0% visibility, 1% chance of survival.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">On the wall, Arya and Sansa share a cute sister moment.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>You used to annoy the crap out of me, but you're pretty cool this season, so take this dagger and head down to the crypt. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \"I don’t know how to use it.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"Stick them with the pointy end.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">First of all, LOL.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Second of all, that's what Jon told Arya in their first combat lesson.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111436\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-1020x574.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-1200x675.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Oof, here come the tears.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">But there's no time for emotions right now! Sam is about to get his eye poked out! Thankfully, that Night Watch dude none of us know by name (it's apparently Eddison Tollett) saves him. His reward: a spear through the back of his skull. Pour one out for What's His Face, everyone!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111411\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Instead of avenging his savior and friend, Sam runs.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96472\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mary-kate-olsen-eye-roll-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"358\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Am I the only one screaming \"WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! OH, NO!!! OMG!\" to myself? Didn't think so.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">One of my \"WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! OH, NO!!! OMG!\" outbursts comes when Dany and Jon collide on their dragons because of the low visibility! I've said it in every other recap and I'll say it again. Dear \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> writers,\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, on the ground, things aren't going much better. Everyone decides to fall back. While Clegane is attempting to run back to safety, a zombie tries to take him out, but Arya's fiery arrow is too quick. I love the twisted relationship these two have built.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-20661\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey.gif 200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-32x32.gif 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-64x64.gif 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-96x96.gif 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-128x128.gif 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-75x75.gif 75w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 200px) 100vw, 200px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The new game plan: light the trenches to keep the dead at bay. The only problem is that the dragons are busy Crash Test Dummy-ing it up in the sky and fiery arrows are being extinguished by the snow and wind! Enter Melisandre, who takes her sweet ass time walking up to the trenches. C'mon, girl, put some pep in your step!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111437\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/must-go-faster.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"152\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Melisandre says, \"Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena\" over and over again, but nothing is happening! The zombies are just about to snack on her head when—KAPOW!—the trenches explode with fire. Phew! Thanks for saving literally everyone, Melisandre, but I still have my eye on you.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111438\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/lucille-arrested-look-eye.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"289\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Down in the crypt, Tyrion pretends to want to be up there getting his butt kicked instead of hanging with ladies and babies, drinking his weight in wine.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \"If I was out there right now...\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \"You’d die.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Another sick comeback! Arya kills with weapons. Sansa kills with words. Be safe, you wise-cracking legend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside by the creepy crying tree, Theon is all set to protect Bran.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Theon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, sorry about taking over Winterfell that one time and generally being a prick.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Bran:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>No worries! BRB!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Theon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Wait, what? This is not a great time for a nap!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Bran's eyes go white and his consciousness goes on a little field trip as a conspiracy of ravens. He immediately finds the Night King, who extends his bad manicure toward the army of the dead, instructing them to throw their bodies on the burning trenches until a bridge can form. (What a cozy show this is.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It doesn't take long for the zombies to breach the fire and start scaling Winterfell's walls. Why didn't the home team embed dragon glass shards into all the exterior walls? That would've saved us all a lot of grief, just saying.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a corner, Clegane stands frozen. Not a great moment to succumb to PTSD, my dude. Look alive (or else you literally won't be). Nearby, Sam cries, until someone saves him again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-42283\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/lc-eyeroll-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"375\" height=\"271\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the courtyard, we get a lingering shot of Lil Lyanna Mormont. I have a bad feeling about this....\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sure enough, a huge dead giant bursts through the gate and smacks her out of the way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-16987\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2015/07/luke-noooo.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"620\" height=\"331\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2015/07/luke-noooo.jpeg 620w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2015/07/luke-noooo-400x214.jpeg 400w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 620px) 100vw, 620px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Elsewhere, Arya crowd-surfs down a stairwell full of dead folk. What a rock star. But let's not celebrate too soon; she gets her head smacked against a stone wall.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111413\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/kermit-nervous.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"264\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Clegane is still PTSD-ing the battle away in a corner.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Eye Patch Dude:\u003c/strong> \"Clegane, we need you!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Clegane:\u003c/strong> \"F*ck off! We can’t beat them. Can’t you see that, you stupid whore?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48702\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/CherylLaugh.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then, Eye Patch Dude points to Arya, who's in the middle of falling off the roof, and says, \"Tell \u003cem>her\u003c/em> that.\" Clegane snaps out of it because Arya is the GOAT of \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em> and we can't have her dying halfway through this episode (...or ever).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Lil Lyanna survived the giant's smack! I think she speaks for all of us when she says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111414\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/lyanna-mormont-battle-of-winterfell.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Lil Lyanna runs up on the giant, who doesn't waste time snatching her up and crushing her skeleton, but not before she stabs him right in his blue contact lens!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-20668\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/3c66593df89a1e418a72dbca059c85fe.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"252\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">What a legend. All flags better be at half mast tomorrow.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In the sky, Viserion tries to ice blast his mom. Maybe he's mad about this whole new stepdad thing?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back inside Winterfell, Arya is trying to avoid hella zombies in the library from hell. She can't really see because of her concussion. It's a good thing she was blind that one season, huh? Arya throws a book as a diversion and tries to hustle out of there, only to run into a dead woman who is quickly made even more dead.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111415\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/arya-zombie-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If anyone survives this battle, there's going to be a whole lot of laundry and cleaning up to do. Getting it all done might take as long as it took Dany to let her dragons out of that dark dungeon a couple of years ago. (Yes, I still have a lot of feelings about that.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Unfortunately, Arya is still not in the clear. Zombies are all over her when Eye Patch Dude saves the day. Clegane snatches Arya up like an In-N-Out to-go order and hauls her out of there.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111416\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/to-go-arya-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They make it to a safe room, where Eye Patch Dude dies from his gazillion stab wounds.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111441\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-rbg.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Melisandre is randomly in the shadows and asks Arya, \"What do we say to the god of Death?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Arya quickly responds with: \"Not today!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106890\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/not-today-satan.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"281\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside, the Night King swoops down and makes Viserion ice blast Winterfell. Um, excuse me, we just dealt with our emotions about the Notre Dame. Can we please keep these historic structures sound?!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon clearly feels the same way because he shows up and things quickly turn into Dragon Mortal Kombat. There's scratching! There's pyromania! There's neck biting! Dany shows up and flings the Night King right off Viserion.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111417\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/night-king-got-bye.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon crash lands and, from the looks of it, Rhaegal is either really hurt or dead. WHAT DID I SAY, \u003cem>GAME OF THRONES\u003c/em> WRITERS?!?!?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Dany flies down and finds the Ice King just standing there like a weirdo. She lights his ass up! Party time!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106880\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/troll-dance-party.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"372\" height=\"254\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, hold up. He's still alive!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111418\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Oh-hai-night-king-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon tries to sneak up on him, but the Night King uses his bad manicure again to revive all the humans who've died tonight. And not just the ones outside the gates either. Little Lyanna wakes up with blue contacts! So does What's His Butt from the Night Watch! And presumably Eye Patch Dude too! In this moment, the message to Jon is clear:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111419\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/run-forrest-run.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, Sam's girlfriend is chilling in the crypt when a skeletal hand shoots out of one of the tombs! Good thing Sansa has that dagger, right? \u003cspan class=\"s1\">😫😫😫😫😫😫\u003c/span> Everyone runs around as the dead gobble up women and children. THIS SHOW, MY GOD!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside by the tree, Theon is lighting hoes up. Bran is still out of office.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111420\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/ron-harry-potter-confused.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"214\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Just when it looks like Jon is about to meet his end on the battlefield, Dany rolls up.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111421\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/GET-IN-LOSER-GOT.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Ack! A f*ckton of zombies jump all over Drogon and stab him all over his body! What an unforced error on Dany's part! I am livid!!!! This is what happens when you get the hots for your nephew! Drogon flies away without Dany and desperately tries shaking the zombies off. I can't watch!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98856\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/wendy-cant.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"148\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Now it's Dany's turn to almost die. Jorah saves her in the nick of time. She's still not gonna sleep with you, but thanks for looking out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back inside Winterfell, Sam needs saving again. I’m sorry to say this, but we should just let him die at this point, right? He doesn’t have the range.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Down in the crypt, the words of Antoine Dodson's viral clip echo against the wall: \"Hide yo' kids, hide yo' wife.\" Sansa and Tyrion are doing just that behind a tomb. Piano keys tinkle as Tyrion kisses Sansa’s hand, perhaps for the last time, as they take out their daggers. Sansa is like, \u003cem>Welp, let’s go re-kill some of my ancestors and see what happens. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, Theon is still doing his best to guard Bran, who is still catching some zzz's or whatever. Look alive, girl!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111422\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/come-on-now-wake-up-bad-girls-club.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"450\" height=\"286\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Time to check in with Sam again. Oh, he's STILL just sitting around and crying. How is he still alive??????? I think he should either try to help in some way or just let Lil Lyanna munch his face off.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In It's-about-time! news: Bran finally signs back onto AOL Instant Messenger.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111423\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/aol-dialup-connecting.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"302\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As the Night King and his homies approach, Bran looks at Theon and says, \"You're a good man. Thank you.\" Weak toast! This guy just slaughtered hundreds of zombies over many hours for you and that's all you got? For Theon, it seems to be enough though. He lets a tear fall before charging at the Night King and quickly getting murdered.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111424\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-beer.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In the courtyard, Viserion (or is it a dead Rhaegal or Drogon, who can tell?!) lets all those stepdaddy issues out by relentlessly blasting Jon with ice fire. Meanwhile, outside the gates, Jorah is getting shish-kebab-ed left and right, while Dany stands there thinking, \u003cem>Wow, this is really bad.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back at the tree, Bran gives the Night King a dose of what he does best: creepily holding eye contact for way too long. The Night King is thorougly weirded out and decides to put an end to this staring contest. He reaches for his weapon and then ARYA MOTHER F*CKING STARK LEAPS OUT OF NOWHERE. THE NIGHT KING CHOKES HER AND SHE LETS HER DAGGER FALL, ONLY TO STAB HIM FROM BELOW LIKE SHE PRACTICED WITH BRIENNE THAT ONE TIME. THE NIGHT KING BURSTS INTO A MILLION ICE PARTICLES, AS DO ALL OF HIS FRIENDS! AND YES, THE REST OF THIS RECAP WILL BE IN ALL CAPS BECAUSE YAAAAAAS!!!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-7660\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mrual4lQ0P1qz4rgp.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"195\" height=\"130\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107386\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/excited-arrested-development.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"275\" height=\"155\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107563\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/excited-kid.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"322\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96625\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yass-beyonce.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101826\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/excited.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-43532\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/sailor-moon-excited-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"391\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-55597\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/12/yass-party.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>WHO RUN THE WORLD? GIRLS, BUT SPECIFICALLY ARYA.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19942\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/giphy-2.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"230\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I CREATED A LITTLE VIDEO OF WHAT THE REACTION AROUND THE WORLD WAS TO ARYA SLAYING THE NIGHT KING:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"singleTwitterStatus","attributes":{"named":{"id":"1122712859421499393"},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>OH, BTW, JORAH TOTALLY DIED. LATER, BRO! YOU SEEMED CHILL. AS DANY CRIES OVER HIS BODY, A DRAGON (THE LAST LIVING?) CUDDLES HER.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19941\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/1361.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"350\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">AS THE SUN COMES UP, MELISANDRE'S PROPHECY COMES TRUE AS SHE TAKES OFF HER YOUTH CRYSTAL, WALKS TOWARD THE HORIZON, TURNS INTO THAT OLD LADY FROM \u003cem>TITANIC\u003c/em> AND DIES. THANKS FOR NOT BEING TOTALLY AWFUL IN THE END.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111440\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-younger.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"385\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, I can't end this recap without paying homage to our fallen heroes. Click play on the abused puppy Sarah McLachlan song below and scroll down through the faces we will never see again (*chokes back sob*):\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/1SiylvmFI_8'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/1SiylvmFI_8'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111429\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"358\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM.png 944w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM-800x447.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM-768x430.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111425\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jorah-got.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"701\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jorah-got.jpg 480w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jorah-got-160x234.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 480px) 100vw, 480px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111426\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-1020x1022.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"641\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-1020x1022.jpeg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-160x160.jpeg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-800x801.jpeg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-768x769.jpeg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-1198x1200.jpeg 1198w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre.jpeg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111427\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eddison-wall-got.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"316\" height=\"490\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eddison-wall-got.png 316w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eddison-wall-got-160x248.png 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 316px) 100vw, 316px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111428\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/beric-got.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"700\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/beric-got.jpg 500w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/beric-got-160x224.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111430\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/theon-grejoy.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"636\" height=\"720\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/theon-grejoy.jpg 636w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/theon-grejoy-160x181.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 636px) 100vw, 636px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire","authors":["27"],"categories":["pop_3"],"tags":["pop_3341","pop_73","pop_8"],"featImg":"pop_111431","label":"pop"},"pop_111174":{"type":"posts","id":"pop_111174","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"pop","id":"111174","score":null,"sort":[1555910977000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on","title":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On","publishDate":1555910977,"format":"standard","headTitle":"KQED Pop | KQED Arts","labelTerm":{"site":"pop"},"content":"\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, all the men (except Lord Varys, Grey Worm and the Unsullied) froze their balls off at Winterfell as they prepared for the zombie apocalypse.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111016\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/frozen-balls.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"267\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of balls, Jon Snow had some pretty big ones for making out with Rhaegal and Drogon's mommy right in front of their faces.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111026\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-kiss-dragon.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And while we're on the topic of Rhaegal and Drogon, I am doubling down on my vow to put the show's writers on my Arya revenge list if they harm even one of their scales.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, and Bran weirded everyone out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111018\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-bran-weird.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A lot.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111022\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/weird-out-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Most especially Jamie.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111029\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-bran-jamie.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jamie:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Oh, sh*t! Is that the kid I threw out the window in episode 1 of this series?!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Bran:\u003c/strong> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-16867\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2015/06/post-33433-surprise-bitch-gif-Madison-Mon-0Xnt.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"281\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Who will Bran creep out next? Will Rhaegal and Drogon scream \"You're not my real dad!!!!\" at Jon in Dragonese? Will Jon scream \"You're my real aunt!!!!\" at Daenerys in English? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We kick things off with the roast of Jamie Lannister. Everyone takes turns letting him know what a prick he used to be. The group could have simply flipped a coin to decide whether to gut him / poison him / let a dire wolf munch on his head, but this way is more fun.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Annoyed that Jamie has the audacity to show up after Cersei went back on her promise to send help, Daenerys lays into him: \"I don't see an army. I see one man with one hand.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On the inside, Jamie is probably thinking, \u003cem>Again with the mono hand jokes? \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111176\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/hand-middle-finger.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"169\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But on the outside, he takes the joke in stride because being turned into a shish kebab for Rhaegal and Drogon doesn't go well with his plan to kind of, sort of flirt with Brienne until one or both of them die this season.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111177\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/colbert-hand-high-five.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While Jamie tries to defend his past prickish ways, Bran blurts out, \"The things we do for love.\" No one knows those are the exact words Jamie said right before pushing Bran out of a window back in the first season, so everyone just shrugs and feels awkward. (For anyone who was taking bets on how long it would take Bran to do something all-knowingly creepy, the winning guess is 3 minutes into the episode. Congrats!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Just when it seems as though Jamie is about to meet his dearly departed hand in the afterlife, Brienne steps forward to vouch for him and manages to convince Sansa and company to spare his life. Oh, just make out already!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109112\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/01/just-kiss-already.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Down in the dragon glass factory, Arya undresses Gendry with her eyes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111179\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/arya-dtf.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Is it hot in here or are these two totally going to bone? I'm hoping the correct answer is both.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109446\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/02/fans-self.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"271\" height=\"251\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside by the bleeding tree, Winterfell's premier spot for heart-to-hearts, Jamie and Bran finally talk out their issues.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jamie:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, my bad about throwing you out that window. It was Season 1! Things were crazier back then.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Bran:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>All is fair in love, war and twincest, I guess.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jamie: \u003c/strong>\u003cem>Thanks for not snitching. Will you tell them after World War Z?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Bran:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>There's going to be an after?\u003c/em> *stares creepily*\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that day, Jamie finds Brienne on the training grounds and tells her that, although he's not a great fighter anymore, he wants to serve under her. That's not the only thing he's interested in doing under her, if you know what I mean, and I think you do.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/gilly-raise-eyebrows-wiig-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"180\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Upstairs, Daenerys decides to buck tradition and have a heart-to-heart with Sansa indoors instead of at the bleeding tree. The tension between them is still \u003cem>Real Housewives of Westeros\u003c/em>-level thick.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I can't believe Tyrion fell for Cersei's trick.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I can't believe you fell for Cersei's trick.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This is what it looks like when you're trying to swallow down the overwhelming urge to kill your boyfriend's sister.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111180\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/daenarys-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Daenerys and Sansa manage to find something they agree on: families are complicated. Just like the Facebook relationship status Dany will post after Jon tells her she's his aunt.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111181\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"612\" height=\"320\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320.jpg 612w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320-160x84.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 612px) 100vw, 612px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany tries to find some more common ground with Sansa:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Women have to support other women! Hillary 2020, am I right?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Elizabeth Warren 2020, actually. P.S. You'll have to wring the North out of my cold, dead, potentially White Walker hands after this is all over. Good talk!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the main gate, back from surviving that little crucified zombie boy's attack last week, Tormund has one thing on his mind: \"The big woman still here?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111182\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/squealing-aww.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I love that Brienne has hos in different area codes. Such swag!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, during a strategy session, everyone agrees that they probably won't stand a chance against the Night King. Even more of a reason for Tormund to shoot his shot. \"We're all going to die,\" he tells the room (but mostly Brienne), \"but at least we die together!\u003cspan class=\"s1\">😉\u003c/span>\" Morbid but hot.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After the meeting is over, everyone turns in for the night. Dany gives Jon bedroom eyes, but he pulls one of these:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-37158\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/diss.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"267\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sorry not sorry, auntie.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The next morning, Missandei greets two little girls, only for them to be racist AF.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111183\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/racist-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Grey Worm shows up to commiserate and they make a pact to move somewhere pro-melanin after this is all over. And I make a pact to cackle really loudly if the Night King snatches those two little brats. When you do racism, the racism comes back to bite!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>OMG, ring the alarm! Ghost, Jon's dire wolf, is back!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111191\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf-1020x661.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"415\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf-1020x661.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf-160x104.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf-800x518.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf-768x498.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf-1200x778.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf.jpg 1432w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Welcome home, buddy!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Unrelated, but related side-note: I cannot wait for Arya's dire wolf, Nymeria, to save the day when we least expect it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Inside, Tormund, Brienne, Jamie, Tyrion and others sit by a fireplace, get tanked on wine and ponder their imminent demises. Tormund makes heart eyes at Brienne while drinking out of a very large, very phallic horn. Not one for subtlety, Tormund takes it a step further and says, \"They call me Giantsbane. Want to know why?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-22895\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/04/PrinceEyebrows.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"296\" height=\"216\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Turns out his nickname has nothing to do with Lil Tormund and everything to do with this time he killed a giant at the age of 10, slept with the giant's wife and then proceeded to suckle at her teet for three months. My feelings on this can be best expressed via Jamie and Tyrion's WTF faces:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111184\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/wtf-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The theme of being cooped up and horny continues downstairs, where Arya interrogates Gendry about his sexual history. After getting Gendry to cough up his number of partners (three), Arya is like, \u003cem>Cool. Wanna boogie down with a fourth? Because there's no way I'm going to die a virgin.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They proceed to bone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106502\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/horny-old-lady-computer-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"338\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back upstairs, Tormund continues to give me reasons to love him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Brienne:\u003c/strong> \"Women can’t be knights.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"Why not?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Brienne:\u003c/strong> \"Tradition.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"F*ck tradition!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">We stan a feminist wildling! And he's not done with his charm offensive either!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"I’m no king, but if I were, I’d knight you ten times over.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">I know I already used this gif earlier for Brienne and Jamie, but, considering they all might be dead soon, I want Brienne to make out with all the boys (and girls?) she wants.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109112\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/01/just-kiss-already.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Not to be outdone, Jamie announces that it doesn't take a king to knight someone; a knight can do it too. Jamie proceeds to knight Brienne as she quietly cries. Tormund wildly applauds nearby. If there ever was a compelling argument for a threesome, this is it! I haven't been this invested in a love triangle since Felicity, Ben and Noel.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1020x680.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1200x800.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1920x1280.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie.jpg 2000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The following day, Jorah approaches Lady Mormont and tries to adultsplain why she should go down in the crypt and hide with the other children before the battle begins. Lady Mormont responds by essentially telling him:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111185\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/who-the-fuck-do-you-think-i-is-beyonce-.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"264\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, down in the crypt, Dany finds Jon staring at a statue of Lyanna Stark.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, boo! What are you up to?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Just looking at a statue of my mom.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>But that would make us...\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Yup.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong>\u003cem> Which would make you the rightful...\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Yup again.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111186\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/shocked-eyes.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"180\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, the Night King and his zombie friends roll up on Winterfell, ready to kill at least 90% of our faves.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"What do you do when an army of zombies is on its way to kill you? Get drunk and have sex!","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1555967973,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":80,"wordCount":1480},"headData":{"title":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On | KQED","description":"What do you do when an army of zombies is on its way to kill you? Get drunk and have sex!","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"111174 https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/?p=111174","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2019/04/21/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on/","disqusTitle":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On","path":"/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, all the men (except Lord Varys, Grey Worm and the Unsullied) froze their balls off at Winterfell as they prepared for the zombie apocalypse.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111016\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/frozen-balls.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"267\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of balls, Jon Snow had some pretty big ones for making out with Rhaegal and Drogon's mommy right in front of their faces.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111026\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-kiss-dragon.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And while we're on the topic of Rhaegal and Drogon, I am doubling down on my vow to put the show's writers on my Arya revenge list if they harm even one of their scales.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, and Bran weirded everyone out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111018\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-bran-weird.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A lot.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111022\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/weird-out-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Most especially Jamie.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111029\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-bran-jamie.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jamie:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Oh, sh*t! Is that the kid I threw out the window in episode 1 of this series?!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Bran:\u003c/strong> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-16867\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2015/06/post-33433-surprise-bitch-gif-Madison-Mon-0Xnt.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"281\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Who will Bran creep out next? Will Rhaegal and Drogon scream \"You're not my real dad!!!!\" at Jon in Dragonese? Will Jon scream \"You're my real aunt!!!!\" at Daenerys in English? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We kick things off with the roast of Jamie Lannister. Everyone takes turns letting him know what a prick he used to be. The group could have simply flipped a coin to decide whether to gut him / poison him / let a dire wolf munch on his head, but this way is more fun.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Annoyed that Jamie has the audacity to show up after Cersei went back on her promise to send help, Daenerys lays into him: \"I don't see an army. I see one man with one hand.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On the inside, Jamie is probably thinking, \u003cem>Again with the mono hand jokes? \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111176\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/hand-middle-finger.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"169\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But on the outside, he takes the joke in stride because being turned into a shish kebab for Rhaegal and Drogon doesn't go well with his plan to kind of, sort of flirt with Brienne until one or both of them die this season.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111177\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/colbert-hand-high-five.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While Jamie tries to defend his past prickish ways, Bran blurts out, \"The things we do for love.\" No one knows those are the exact words Jamie said right before pushing Bran out of a window back in the first season, so everyone just shrugs and feels awkward. (For anyone who was taking bets on how long it would take Bran to do something all-knowingly creepy, the winning guess is 3 minutes into the episode. Congrats!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Just when it seems as though Jamie is about to meet his dearly departed hand in the afterlife, Brienne steps forward to vouch for him and manages to convince Sansa and company to spare his life. Oh, just make out already!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109112\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/01/just-kiss-already.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Down in the dragon glass factory, Arya undresses Gendry with her eyes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111179\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/arya-dtf.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Is it hot in here or are these two totally going to bone? I'm hoping the correct answer is both.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109446\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/02/fans-self.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"271\" height=\"251\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside by the bleeding tree, Winterfell's premier spot for heart-to-hearts, Jamie and Bran finally talk out their issues.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jamie:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, my bad about throwing you out that window. It was Season 1! Things were crazier back then.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Bran:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>All is fair in love, war and twincest, I guess.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jamie: \u003c/strong>\u003cem>Thanks for not snitching. Will you tell them after World War Z?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Bran:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>There's going to be an after?\u003c/em> *stares creepily*\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that day, Jamie finds Brienne on the training grounds and tells her that, although he's not a great fighter anymore, he wants to serve under her. That's not the only thing he's interested in doing under her, if you know what I mean, and I think you do.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/gilly-raise-eyebrows-wiig-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"180\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Upstairs, Daenerys decides to buck tradition and have a heart-to-heart with Sansa indoors instead of at the bleeding tree. The tension between them is still \u003cem>Real Housewives of Westeros\u003c/em>-level thick.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I can't believe Tyrion fell for Cersei's trick.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I can't believe you fell for Cersei's trick.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This is what it looks like when you're trying to swallow down the overwhelming urge to kill your boyfriend's sister.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111180\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/daenarys-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Daenerys and Sansa manage to find something they agree on: families are complicated. Just like the Facebook relationship status Dany will post after Jon tells her she's his aunt.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111181\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"612\" height=\"320\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320.jpg 612w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320-160x84.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 612px) 100vw, 612px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany tries to find some more common ground with Sansa:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Women have to support other women! Hillary 2020, am I right?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Elizabeth Warren 2020, actually. P.S. You'll have to wring the North out of my cold, dead, potentially White Walker hands after this is all over. Good talk!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the main gate, back from surviving that little crucified zombie boy's attack last week, Tormund has one thing on his mind: \"The big woman still here?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111182\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/squealing-aww.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I love that Brienne has hos in different area codes. Such swag!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, during a strategy session, everyone agrees that they probably won't stand a chance against the Night King. Even more of a reason for Tormund to shoot his shot. \"We're all going to die,\" he tells the room (but mostly Brienne), \"but at least we die together!\u003cspan class=\"s1\">😉\u003c/span>\" Morbid but hot.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After the meeting is over, everyone turns in for the night. Dany gives Jon bedroom eyes, but he pulls one of these:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-37158\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/diss.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"267\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sorry not sorry, auntie.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The next morning, Missandei greets two little girls, only for them to be racist AF.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111183\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/racist-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Grey Worm shows up to commiserate and they make a pact to move somewhere pro-melanin after this is all over. And I make a pact to cackle really loudly if the Night King snatches those two little brats. When you do racism, the racism comes back to bite!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>OMG, ring the alarm! Ghost, Jon's dire wolf, is back!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111191\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf-1020x661.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"415\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf-1020x661.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf-160x104.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf-800x518.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf-768x498.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf-1200x778.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/dire-wolf.jpg 1432w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Welcome home, buddy!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Unrelated, but related side-note: I cannot wait for Arya's dire wolf, Nymeria, to save the day when we least expect it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Inside, Tormund, Brienne, Jamie, Tyrion and others sit by a fireplace, get tanked on wine and ponder their imminent demises. Tormund makes heart eyes at Brienne while drinking out of a very large, very phallic horn. Not one for subtlety, Tormund takes it a step further and says, \"They call me Giantsbane. Want to know why?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-22895\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/04/PrinceEyebrows.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"296\" height=\"216\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Turns out his nickname has nothing to do with Lil Tormund and everything to do with this time he killed a giant at the age of 10, slept with the giant's wife and then proceeded to suckle at her teet for three months. My feelings on this can be best expressed via Jamie and Tyrion's WTF faces:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111184\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/wtf-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The theme of being cooped up and horny continues downstairs, where Arya interrogates Gendry about his sexual history. After getting Gendry to cough up his number of partners (three), Arya is like, \u003cem>Cool. Wanna boogie down with a fourth? Because there's no way I'm going to die a virgin.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They proceed to bone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106502\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/horny-old-lady-computer-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"338\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back upstairs, Tormund continues to give me reasons to love him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Brienne:\u003c/strong> \"Women can’t be knights.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"Why not?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Brienne:\u003c/strong> \"Tradition.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"F*ck tradition!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">We stan a feminist wildling! And he's not done with his charm offensive either!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"I’m no king, but if I were, I’d knight you ten times over.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">I know I already used this gif earlier for Brienne and Jamie, but, considering they all might be dead soon, I want Brienne to make out with all the boys (and girls?) she wants.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109112\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/01/just-kiss-already.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Not to be outdone, Jamie announces that it doesn't take a king to knight someone; a knight can do it too. Jamie proceeds to knight Brienne as she quietly cries. Tormund wildly applauds nearby. If there ever was a compelling argument for a threesome, this is it! I haven't been this invested in a love triangle since Felicity, Ben and Noel.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1020x680.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1200x800.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1920x1280.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie.jpg 2000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The following day, Jorah approaches Lady Mormont and tries to adultsplain why she should go down in the crypt and hide with the other children before the battle begins. Lady Mormont responds by essentially telling him:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111185\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/who-the-fuck-do-you-think-i-is-beyonce-.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"264\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, down in the crypt, Dany finds Jon staring at a statue of Lyanna Stark.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, boo! What are you up to?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Just looking at a statue of my mom.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>But that would make us...\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Yup.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong>\u003cem> Which would make you the rightful...\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Yup again.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111186\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/shocked-eyes.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"180\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, the Night King and his zombie friends roll up on Winterfell, ready to kill at least 90% of our faves.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on","authors":["27"],"categories":["pop_3"],"tags":["pop_3341","pop_73","pop_8"],"featImg":"pop_111189","label":"pop"},"pop_111008":{"type":"posts","id":"pop_111008","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"pop","id":"111008","score":null,"sort":[1555309521000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap","title":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good","publishDate":1555309521,"format":"standard","headTitle":"KQED Pop | KQED Arts","labelTerm":{"site":"pop"},"content":"\u003cp>\u003cem>The wait for a new episode of Game Of Thrones is finally over!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-7667\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp.gif 245w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp-32x32.gif 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp-64x64.gif 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp-96x96.gif 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp-128x128.gif 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp-75x75.gif 75w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 245px) 100vw, 245px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Let's not waste any more time with introductions. On with the recap!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A millisecond into the intro and I've already gasped. R.I.P. The Wall!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111012\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-wall.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone in the seven kingdoms is about to be this lady:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111013\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/help-me.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"206\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Arya—or as I like to call her Queen Arya of the House Stark, the First of Her Name, Keeper of Lists, Queen of My Heart, the Unbothered—watches as hundreds of troops gallop into Winterfell to prepare for the zombie apocalypse. She spots blasts from her past, including Gendry, Clegane and her brother from another mother (and father, turns out), Jon Snow. She almost calls out to Jon but stops herself. Ugh, nothing has even happened yet and I already want to cry. This is going to be a very emotional and overwhelming six weeks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111015\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/somebody-sedate-me-greys-anatomy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"442\" height=\"288\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone looks solemn because, well, that's just what your face does when the world is ending. Also, I'm assuming that, like me, everyone is still mourning Viserion. *blasts the saddest Adele song and cries while stroking a photo of Viserion before he got ice blue contacts*\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, sorry, I promise to try and pull myself together. Tyrion helps me do so by cracking the first joke of the season, telling noted eunuch Varys: \"You should consider yourself lucky. At least your balls won't freeze off.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111016\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/frozen-balls.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"267\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We might be laughing, but Varys is not amused.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-13362\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2014/09/notfunny.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"235\" height=\"183\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere in the procession, Missandei and Grey Worm pretend not to notice that a whole bunch of these white folk are seeing black people for the first time.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111017\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-stare.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The white folk are further spooked by their first sight of dragons. Rhaegal and Drogon show off, while their mommy smiles her approval from below. I swear, if anything happens to them, I will make my own Arya-style revenge list featuring the names of the show's writers.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>(And yes, I just took the time to make this, even though I'm on deadline. That's how serious I am about the well-being of these dragons! But I digress...)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon Snow gallops through the Winterfell gates and rushes to kiss Bran. Watch how quickly Jon goes from \u003cem>Yay! My baby bro is all grown up now!\u003c/em> to \u003cem>WTF! My baby bro is off-puttingly weird now! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111018\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-bran-weird.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Want another super awkward encounter? Good. Daenerys walks up to Sansa and smiles in a \u003cem>I'm sleeping with your brother so it's best if we get along, but I will totally instruct one of my dragon babies to torch your head if I need to\u003c/em> kind of way. Sansa smiles back in a \u003cem>I let dogs devour my ex; don't test me\u003c/em> kind of way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Bran interrupts their fake smile duel with a CliffsNotes version of how f*cked they all are: \u003cem>Hey, y'all! We don't have time for this BS! Your dragon was turned into a zombie, the Wall went kablooey and Waze says the zombie army's ETA is VERY SOON. So get your sh*t together! Thanks for coming to my TedTalk.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After bringing all the North's VIPs together for a strategy session, Sansa proves that, although she might no longer wield power over this particular kingdom anymore, she does still wield the power of a withering side eye.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111019\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-side-eye.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She's not the only one less than thrilled about Daenerys taking over. Our favorite grade school badass, Lady Lyanna Mormont, stands up to call Jon out: \"Your Grace... but you're not, are you? You left Winterfell a king and came back a... I'm not sure what you are now. A lord? Nothing at all?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111020\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/stop-hes-already-dead.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon takes being eviscerated by a nine-year-old pretty well and explains that titles won't matter much if the Night King kills them all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sansa brings up the issue of not having enough food to feed a vast army and two huge dragons. Daenerys is too jet-lagged to keep up the fake smile charade. She's now graduated to flat out saying, \u003cem>I will totally feed you to my dragons if you keep testing me, little girl.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111021\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-stardown-dragons-eat.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because this episode hasn't been awkward enough, Tyrion approaches his ex-wife, Sansa, for a chat.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \"Last time we spoke was at Joffrey's wedding. Miserable affair.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \"It had its moments.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106478\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/laugh-spit-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"220\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-108934\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/01/new-york-tiffany-wine-laughing-lol.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"307\" height=\"179\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, if you don't stan for Sansa after the way she just savored the memory of Joffrey croaking, something's wrong with you. Honestly, if she's the one sitting on the Iron Throne at the end of all this, I won't be mad.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That joke is enough for Tyrion to forgive Sansa for bouncing on him without warning all those years ago. Plus, he's smart enough to know it isn't wise to bet against her: \"Many underestimated you. Most of them are dead now.\" Damn straight!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of underestimating women, Sansa can't believe Tyrion is falling for Cersei's pretend vow to send help. \"I used to think you were the cleverest man alive.\" Ouch. If she's doesn't ease up soon, Tyrion is going to join the no-balls-left-to-freeze club.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, would you look at the time! It's Bran-weirds-someone-else-out o'clock!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111022\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/weird-out-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Out by the bleeding Weirwood tree, Arya sneaks up on Jon and accuses him of lying about his height on his driver's license:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"You used to be taller.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"How did you sneak up on me?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"How did you survive a knife through the heart.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"I didn't.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They laugh and hug. Glad we can all chuckle about Jon's gruesome death now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111023\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/sad-laugh-bridesmaids.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"260\" height=\"166\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After comparing swords (like us, Jon is a Needle Fan Club member), Jon complains about Sansa not being nice to his \u003cdel>aunt\u003c/del> new girlfriend. Before Bran can pop up from behind the tree to give his WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS BS! TedTalk again, Arya sets Jon straight:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"Sansa thinks she's smarter than everyone.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"She's the smartest person I have ever met.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Starks rule, Targaryen drool (while making out with each other).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Down in King's Landing, Cersei is informed about the Night King breaking through the Wall. Her sociopathic response does not disappoint.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111024\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cersei-game-of-thrones-good-lol.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And that's not the only bon mot she's got for us. Later that night, Euron Greyjoy tries to booty call Cersei. She slays him with a line that will surely be weaponized on dating apps for years to come:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111025\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/you-want-a-whore-buy-one-cersei-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After Euron reminds Cersei of the fact that, without his men, she'll be easily overthrown, Cersei reconsiders and lets him hit it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111031\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/oh-god-honey-no.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"201\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And they're not the only ones getting it on. Elsewhere in the castle, Bronn is busy doing what he does best—having an orgy—'cause it's a day ending in y. Cersei's right-hand man interrupts the foursome with a proposition: A bottomless fund for prostitutes in exchange for murdering Jamie and Tyrion (if the zombies don't get to them first). Somewhere out there, Jamie's last remaining middle finger goes up in the direction of Cersei's bedroom.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of Cersei's bedroom, Euron is in there asking if he's better at sex than her brother.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong> \"You enjoy risking your neck, don't you?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Euron:\u003c/strong> \"Life is boring!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong> \"You might be the most arrogant man I've ever met. I like that.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Euron:\u003c/strong> \"I'm going to put a prince in your belly.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>First of all, ew. Second of all, womb already rented out, dude. Sorry.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On a ship in the harbor, arrows shoot through a bunch of unsuspecting skulls. Oh, how we've missed you, \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>. After axing a guard right in the face, Theon rescues Yara, who immediately head butts him in the nose. Siblings: can't live with 'em, can't have an unfractured septum without 'em.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Winterfell, this whole Daenerys vs. Sansa thing is still going on.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \"Your sister doesn't like me. She doesn't need to be my friend, but I am her Queen. If she can't respect me...\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few Dothraki interrupt, but we can already guess how that thought ends. Something to do with Sansa being turned into a tasty kebab for our two favorite reptiles.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of Drogon and Rhaegal, it's time for their close-up, Mr. Demille. Daenerys hops on one of them for a ride and encourages Jon to do the same.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"I don't know how to ride a dragon.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \"Nobody does until they ride a dragon.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"What if he doesn't want me to?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \"Then I've enjoyed your company, Jon Snow.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let's take a moment to savor this witty foreplay banter while they're still in the dark about their 23andMe DNA results.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After flying around for a while, they settle in front of a snow-covered waterfall.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"It's cold up here for a southern girl.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \"So keep your Queen warm.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, I get that I'm supposed to be grossed out by them being related, but I'm strangely into this.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>What? Don't look at me like that! They've been through a lot! They deserve a few orgasms!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While they're licking the insides of each other's mouths, Jon Snow opens one of his eyes to find that not everyone is on board with this incestuous coupling.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111026\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-kiss-dragon.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-108543\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/01/dinosaurs-laugh-baby.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"383\" height=\"277\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Winterfell, Arya rolls up on Clegane, who for some reason thinks it's a good idea to call her out:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Clegane:\u003c/strong> \"You left me to die!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"First I robbed you.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111027\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/comeback.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"320\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But she's not done roasting people. When noticing that her dagger is made of Valerian steel, Gendry says, \"I always knew you were just another rich girl.\" To which, Arya claps back, \"You don't know any other rich girls.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111027\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/comeback.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"320\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere in the castle, Daenerys walks up to Samwell to thank him for curing Jorah of his psoriasis or whatever. Their conversation goes something like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Wait, your last name is Tarly?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Samwell:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Yep!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Oh, I killed your dad.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Samwell:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>What?!\u003c/em> *stifled sob* \u003cem>Well, he was a dick anyway. I guess the silver lining is that now I get to go back home 'cause my brother will be in charge and he's not so bad.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Um, yeah, about that... I killed him too. #Awkward! Anyway, thanks again for being my friend's dermatologist. See you around!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Samwell runs outside, crying, only to get hit by the Bran Weirdo Express. Bran tells Sam it's time to tell Jon that he's sleeping with his aunt. Someone hand Bran some popcorn 'cause he sure does live for the drama.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101650\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/popcorn-steph-curry-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sam finds Jon being emo in the crypt and breaks the news to him. \u003cem>Your new girlfriend killed my family. And she's your aunt.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This pretty much sums up Jon's reaction:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-44499\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/publizity-wait-whet-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In some other part of the North, Tormund a.k.a. Ginger Daddy and a few others walk into an abandoned, bloody castle. They hear a bit of clanging and prepare to throw down, but it turns out to be a friend. Phew! But their friend is still spooked: \"Stay back! He's got blue eyes!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"I've always had blue eyes!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You have to appreciate the \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em> writers' ability to weave in this many LOL moments into such a dark story. Alas, the laughter is short lived because OMG THERE IS A LITTLE BOY CRUCIFIED IN THE CENTER OF A PINWHEEL OF SEVERED LIMBS AND HE DOESN'T STAY DEAD FOR LONG!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111028\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-evil-zombie-boy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109113\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/01/buffy-cross.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"244\" height=\"160\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Winterfell, it's that time again: Bran Weirds Someone Out o'clock! But this one is way more loaded than the rest because Jamie is on the receiving end.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111029\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-bran-jamie.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jamie:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Oh, sh*t! Is that the kid I threw out the window in episode 1 of this series?!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Bran:\u003c/strong> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-16867\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2015/06/post-33433-surprise-bitch-gif-Madison-Mon-0Xnt.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"281\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Need a cheeky unpacking of all the crazy stuff that happened in this week's 'Game of Thrones' premiere? This recap has your back! ⚔️🐉\r\n","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1555311921,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":112,"wordCount":2067},"headData":{"title":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good | KQED","description":"Need a cheeky unpacking of all the crazy stuff that happened in this week's 'Game of Thrones' premiere? This recap has your back! ⚔️🐉\r\n","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"111008 https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/?p=111008","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2019/04/14/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap/","disqusTitle":"'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good","path":"/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cem>The wait for a new episode of Game Of Thrones is finally over!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-7667\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp.gif 245w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp-32x32.gif 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp-64x64.gif 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp-96x96.gif 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp-128x128.gif 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mru6pebj0e1qz4rgp-75x75.gif 75w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 245px) 100vw, 245px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Let's not waste any more time with introductions. On with the recap!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A millisecond into the intro and I've already gasped. R.I.P. The Wall!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111012\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-wall.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone in the seven kingdoms is about to be this lady:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111013\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/help-me.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"206\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Arya—or as I like to call her Queen Arya of the House Stark, the First of Her Name, Keeper of Lists, Queen of My Heart, the Unbothered—watches as hundreds of troops gallop into Winterfell to prepare for the zombie apocalypse. She spots blasts from her past, including Gendry, Clegane and her brother from another mother (and father, turns out), Jon Snow. She almost calls out to Jon but stops herself. Ugh, nothing has even happened yet and I already want to cry. This is going to be a very emotional and overwhelming six weeks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111015\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/somebody-sedate-me-greys-anatomy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"442\" height=\"288\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone looks solemn because, well, that's just what your face does when the world is ending. Also, I'm assuming that, like me, everyone is still mourning Viserion. *blasts the saddest Adele song and cries while stroking a photo of Viserion before he got ice blue contacts*\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, sorry, I promise to try and pull myself together. Tyrion helps me do so by cracking the first joke of the season, telling noted eunuch Varys: \"You should consider yourself lucky. At least your balls won't freeze off.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111016\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/frozen-balls.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"267\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We might be laughing, but Varys is not amused.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-13362\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2014/09/notfunny.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"235\" height=\"183\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere in the procession, Missandei and Grey Worm pretend not to notice that a whole bunch of these white folk are seeing black people for the first time.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111017\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-stare.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The white folk are further spooked by their first sight of dragons. Rhaegal and Drogon show off, while their mommy smiles her approval from below. I swear, if anything happens to them, I will make my own Arya-style revenge list featuring the names of the show's writers.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>(And yes, I just took the time to make this, even though I'm on deadline. That's how serious I am about the well-being of these dragons! But I digress...)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon Snow gallops through the Winterfell gates and rushes to kiss Bran. Watch how quickly Jon goes from \u003cem>Yay! My baby bro is all grown up now!\u003c/em> to \u003cem>WTF! My baby bro is off-puttingly weird now! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111018\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-bran-weird.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Want another super awkward encounter? Good. Daenerys walks up to Sansa and smiles in a \u003cem>I'm sleeping with your brother so it's best if we get along, but I will totally instruct one of my dragon babies to torch your head if I need to\u003c/em> kind of way. Sansa smiles back in a \u003cem>I let dogs devour my ex; don't test me\u003c/em> kind of way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Bran interrupts their fake smile duel with a CliffsNotes version of how f*cked they all are: \u003cem>Hey, y'all! We don't have time for this BS! Your dragon was turned into a zombie, the Wall went kablooey and Waze says the zombie army's ETA is VERY SOON. So get your sh*t together! Thanks for coming to my TedTalk.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After bringing all the North's VIPs together for a strategy session, Sansa proves that, although she might no longer wield power over this particular kingdom anymore, she does still wield the power of a withering side eye.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111019\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-side-eye.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She's not the only one less than thrilled about Daenerys taking over. Our favorite grade school badass, Lady Lyanna Mormont, stands up to call Jon out: \"Your Grace... but you're not, are you? You left Winterfell a king and came back a... I'm not sure what you are now. A lord? Nothing at all?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111020\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/stop-hes-already-dead.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon takes being eviscerated by a nine-year-old pretty well and explains that titles won't matter much if the Night King kills them all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sansa brings up the issue of not having enough food to feed a vast army and two huge dragons. Daenerys is too jet-lagged to keep up the fake smile charade. She's now graduated to flat out saying, \u003cem>I will totally feed you to my dragons if you keep testing me, little girl.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111021\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-stardown-dragons-eat.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because this episode hasn't been awkward enough, Tyrion approaches his ex-wife, Sansa, for a chat.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \"Last time we spoke was at Joffrey's wedding. Miserable affair.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \"It had its moments.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106478\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/laugh-spit-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"220\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-108934\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/01/new-york-tiffany-wine-laughing-lol.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"307\" height=\"179\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, if you don't stan for Sansa after the way she just savored the memory of Joffrey croaking, something's wrong with you. Honestly, if she's the one sitting on the Iron Throne at the end of all this, I won't be mad.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That joke is enough for Tyrion to forgive Sansa for bouncing on him without warning all those years ago. Plus, he's smart enough to know it isn't wise to bet against her: \"Many underestimated you. Most of them are dead now.\" Damn straight!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of underestimating women, Sansa can't believe Tyrion is falling for Cersei's pretend vow to send help. \"I used to think you were the cleverest man alive.\" Ouch. If she's doesn't ease up soon, Tyrion is going to join the no-balls-left-to-freeze club.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, would you look at the time! It's Bran-weirds-someone-else-out o'clock!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111022\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/weird-out-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Out by the bleeding Weirwood tree, Arya sneaks up on Jon and accuses him of lying about his height on his driver's license:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"You used to be taller.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"How did you sneak up on me?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"How did you survive a knife through the heart.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"I didn't.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They laugh and hug. Glad we can all chuckle about Jon's gruesome death now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111023\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/sad-laugh-bridesmaids.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"260\" height=\"166\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After comparing swords (like us, Jon is a Needle Fan Club member), Jon complains about Sansa not being nice to his \u003cdel>aunt\u003c/del> new girlfriend. Before Bran can pop up from behind the tree to give his WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS BS! TedTalk again, Arya sets Jon straight:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"Sansa thinks she's smarter than everyone.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"She's the smartest person I have ever met.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Starks rule, Targaryen drool (while making out with each other).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Down in King's Landing, Cersei is informed about the Night King breaking through the Wall. Her sociopathic response does not disappoint.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111024\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cersei-game-of-thrones-good-lol.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And that's not the only bon mot she's got for us. Later that night, Euron Greyjoy tries to booty call Cersei. She slays him with a line that will surely be weaponized on dating apps for years to come:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111025\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/you-want-a-whore-buy-one-cersei-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After Euron reminds Cersei of the fact that, without his men, she'll be easily overthrown, Cersei reconsiders and lets him hit it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111031\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/oh-god-honey-no.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"201\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And they're not the only ones getting it on. Elsewhere in the castle, Bronn is busy doing what he does best—having an orgy—'cause it's a day ending in y. Cersei's right-hand man interrupts the foursome with a proposition: A bottomless fund for prostitutes in exchange for murdering Jamie and Tyrion (if the zombies don't get to them first). Somewhere out there, Jamie's last remaining middle finger goes up in the direction of Cersei's bedroom.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of Cersei's bedroom, Euron is in there asking if he's better at sex than her brother.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong> \"You enjoy risking your neck, don't you?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Euron:\u003c/strong> \"Life is boring!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong> \"You might be the most arrogant man I've ever met. I like that.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Euron:\u003c/strong> \"I'm going to put a prince in your belly.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>First of all, ew. Second of all, womb already rented out, dude. Sorry.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On a ship in the harbor, arrows shoot through a bunch of unsuspecting skulls. Oh, how we've missed you, \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>. After axing a guard right in the face, Theon rescues Yara, who immediately head butts him in the nose. Siblings: can't live with 'em, can't have an unfractured septum without 'em.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Winterfell, this whole Daenerys vs. Sansa thing is still going on.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \"Your sister doesn't like me. She doesn't need to be my friend, but I am her Queen. If she can't respect me...\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few Dothraki interrupt, but we can already guess how that thought ends. Something to do with Sansa being turned into a tasty kebab for our two favorite reptiles.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of Drogon and Rhaegal, it's time for their close-up, Mr. Demille. Daenerys hops on one of them for a ride and encourages Jon to do the same.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"I don't know how to ride a dragon.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \"Nobody does until they ride a dragon.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"What if he doesn't want me to?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \"Then I've enjoyed your company, Jon Snow.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let's take a moment to savor this witty foreplay banter while they're still in the dark about their 23andMe DNA results.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After flying around for a while, they settle in front of a snow-covered waterfall.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"It's cold up here for a southern girl.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \"So keep your Queen warm.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, I get that I'm supposed to be grossed out by them being related, but I'm strangely into this.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>What? Don't look at me like that! They've been through a lot! They deserve a few orgasms!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While they're licking the insides of each other's mouths, Jon Snow opens one of his eyes to find that not everyone is on board with this incestuous coupling.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111026\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-kiss-dragon.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-108543\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/01/dinosaurs-laugh-baby.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"383\" height=\"277\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Winterfell, Arya rolls up on Clegane, who for some reason thinks it's a good idea to call her out:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Clegane:\u003c/strong> \"You left me to die!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"First I robbed you.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111027\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/comeback.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"320\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But she's not done roasting people. When noticing that her dagger is made of Valerian steel, Gendry says, \"I always knew you were just another rich girl.\" To which, Arya claps back, \"You don't know any other rich girls.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111027\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/comeback.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"320\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere in the castle, Daenerys walks up to Samwell to thank him for curing Jorah of his psoriasis or whatever. Their conversation goes something like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Wait, your last name is Tarly?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Samwell:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Yep!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Oh, I killed your dad.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Samwell:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>What?!\u003c/em> *stifled sob* \u003cem>Well, he was a dick anyway. I guess the silver lining is that now I get to go back home 'cause my brother will be in charge and he's not so bad.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Daenerys:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Um, yeah, about that... I killed him too. #Awkward! Anyway, thanks again for being my friend's dermatologist. See you around!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Samwell runs outside, crying, only to get hit by the Bran Weirdo Express. Bran tells Sam it's time to tell Jon that he's sleeping with his aunt. Someone hand Bran some popcorn 'cause he sure does live for the drama.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101650\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/popcorn-steph-curry-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sam finds Jon being emo in the crypt and breaks the news to him. \u003cem>Your new girlfriend killed my family. And she's your aunt.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This pretty much sums up Jon's reaction:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-44499\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/publizity-wait-whet-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In some other part of the North, Tormund a.k.a. Ginger Daddy and a few others walk into an abandoned, bloody castle. They hear a bit of clanging and prepare to throw down, but it turns out to be a friend. Phew! But their friend is still spooked: \"Stay back! He's got blue eyes!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"I've always had blue eyes!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You have to appreciate the \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em> writers' ability to weave in this many LOL moments into such a dark story. Alas, the laughter is short lived because OMG THERE IS A LITTLE BOY CRUCIFIED IN THE CENTER OF A PINWHEEL OF SEVERED LIMBS AND HE DOESN'T STAY DEAD FOR LONG!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111028\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-evil-zombie-boy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109113\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/01/buffy-cross.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"244\" height=\"160\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Winterfell, it's that time again: Bran Weirds Someone Out o'clock! But this one is way more loaded than the rest because Jamie is on the receiving end.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111029\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/game-of-thrones-bran-jamie.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jamie:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Oh, sh*t! Is that the kid I threw out the window in episode 1 of this series?!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Bran:\u003c/strong> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-16867\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2015/06/post-33433-surprise-bitch-gif-Madison-Mon-0Xnt.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"281\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap","authors":["27"],"categories":["pop_3"],"tags":["pop_3341","pop_73","pop_8"],"featImg":"pop_111032","label":"pop"},"pop_110739":{"type":"posts","id":"pop_110739","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"pop","id":"110739","score":null,"sort":[1555072015000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"9-game-of-thrones-intro-parodies-to-tide-you-over-til-the-season-8-premiere","title":"9 'Game Of Thrones' Intro Parodies To Tide You Over Until The Season 8 Premiere","publishDate":1555072015,"format":"standard","headTitle":"KQED Pop | KQED Arts","labelTerm":{"site":"pop"},"content":"\u003cp>There are two days, 10 hours, 34 minutes and 44 seconds to go before we finally get to feast our eyes on the final season of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> (check out \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/109935/game-of-thrones-every-omg-moment-from-the-season-8-trailer\">all the OMG moments from the trailer\u003c/a>, if you haven't already). We don't know much about what's about to befall Cersei and co., but one thing is for sure, the streets will be filled with cries of DAA DAAA DA DA DAA on premiere night.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110844\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/got-intro-meme.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"522\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/got-intro-meme.png 500w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/got-intro-meme-160x167.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/got-intro-meme-32x32.png 32w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\">The dramatic, ever-changing \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> intro inspires a lot of feelings. And a lot of parodies too. Here are 11 riffs to tide you over until April 14, 2019.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Oreos!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xmf-6TYjGuQ\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To announce a limited edition \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> batch of Oreos, Nabisco created an intro made entirely of cookies and cream. Mmmmm, cookies.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Paper!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4EEQXO_Y38\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Taking a page (har har) from Oreo's playbook, Moleskin created an intro, made entirely out of paper, to announce their collection of \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em>-themed notebooks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Yoda Pez Dispenser!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0ceNkb44Lk\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This DIY \u003cem>Funny or Die\u003c/em> parody starts off normally enough. And then, as more and more \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em> bros join the DAA DAAA DAA chorus, the Westeros map goes nuts, revealing non-canon locales such as an Apple store, a Yoda Pez dispenser and a DVD copy of \u003cem>We Bought A Zoo\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Hobbits!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AckMP3B1yQc\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sick of traveling through Westeros? Get in, loser, we're going to Middle Earth!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>The Simpsons!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qq_5UQry3T4\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If \u003cem>Lord of the Rings\u003c/em> isn't your thing, how about a field trip to Springfield instead?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Social Media!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=el8Ydwh0QlQ\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's hard to find a place more brutal than Westeros, but the world of social media comes pretty close.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Legos!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mb9fybxt8B4\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I haven't seen \u003cem>The Lego Movie\u003c/em>, but if it's anything like this, I'm in.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Pokémon!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3HEX9X5gNM\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As if this list wasn't geeky enough, here's a Pokémon intro for good measure.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Mario!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://youtu.be/eFSiiiFkvhM\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Too old to care about Pokémon? Then, this \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em> rendering of \u003cem>Super Mario World\u003c/em> is for you. Now I can't stop casting Mario characters into \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>. Princess Peach is obviously Daenerys. Mario is Jon Snow. Bowser is Cersei. Yoshi is Arya. Ok, I'm going to stop now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Come back to this space for weekly recaps of \u003c/em>Game of Thrones\u003cem>, starting April 14, 2019!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Mario! Oreos! Yoda Pez Dispensers! There's a 'Game of Thrones' intro parody for whatever you're into.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1555090472,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":true,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":14,"wordCount":448},"headData":{"title":"9 'Game Of Thrones' Intro Parodies To Tide You Over Until The Season 8 Premiere | KQED","description":"Mario! Oreos! Yoda Pez Dispensers! There's a 'Game of Thrones' intro parody for whatever you're into.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"110739 https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/?p=110739","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2019/04/12/9-game-of-thrones-intro-parodies-to-tide-you-over-til-the-season-8-premiere/","disqusTitle":"9 'Game Of Thrones' Intro Parodies To Tide You Over Until The Season 8 Premiere","path":"/pop/110739/9-game-of-thrones-intro-parodies-to-tide-you-over-til-the-season-8-premiere","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>There are two days, 10 hours, 34 minutes and 44 seconds to go before we finally get to feast our eyes on the final season of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> (check out \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/109935/game-of-thrones-every-omg-moment-from-the-season-8-trailer\">all the OMG moments from the trailer\u003c/a>, if you haven't already). We don't know much about what's about to befall Cersei and co., but one thing is for sure, the streets will be filled with cries of DAA DAAA DA DA DAA on premiere night.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110844\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/got-intro-meme.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"522\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/got-intro-meme.png 500w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/got-intro-meme-160x167.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/got-intro-meme-32x32.png 32w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\">The dramatic, ever-changing \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> intro inspires a lot of feelings. And a lot of parodies too. Here are 11 riffs to tide you over until April 14, 2019.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Oreos!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/xmf-6TYjGuQ'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/xmf-6TYjGuQ'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>To announce a limited edition \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> batch of Oreos, Nabisco created an intro made entirely of cookies and cream. Mmmmm, cookies.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Paper!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/w4EEQXO_Y38'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/w4EEQXO_Y38'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Taking a page (har har) from Oreo's playbook, Moleskin created an intro, made entirely out of paper, to announce their collection of \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em>-themed notebooks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Yoda Pez Dispenser!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/k0ceNkb44Lk'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/k0ceNkb44Lk'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>This DIY \u003cem>Funny or Die\u003c/em> parody starts off normally enough. And then, as more and more \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em> bros join the DAA DAAA DAA chorus, the Westeros map goes nuts, revealing non-canon locales such as an Apple store, a Yoda Pez dispenser and a DVD copy of \u003cem>We Bought A Zoo\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Hobbits!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/AckMP3B1yQc'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/AckMP3B1yQc'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Sick of traveling through Westeros? Get in, loser, we're going to Middle Earth!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>The Simpsons!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/qq_5UQry3T4'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/qq_5UQry3T4'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>If \u003cem>Lord of the Rings\u003c/em> isn't your thing, how about a field trip to Springfield instead?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Social Media!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/el8Ydwh0QlQ'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/el8Ydwh0QlQ'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>It's hard to find a place more brutal than Westeros, but the world of social media comes pretty close.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Legos!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/Mb9fybxt8B4'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/Mb9fybxt8B4'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>I haven't seen \u003cem>The Lego Movie\u003c/em>, but if it's anything like this, I'm in.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Pokémon!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/l3HEX9X5gNM'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/l3HEX9X5gNM'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>As if this list wasn't geeky enough, here's a Pokémon intro for good measure.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Mario!\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/eFSiiiFkvhM'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/eFSiiiFkvhM'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Too old to care about Pokémon? Then, this \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em> rendering of \u003cem>Super Mario World\u003c/em> is for you. Now I can't stop casting Mario characters into \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>. Princess Peach is obviously Daenerys. Mario is Jon Snow. Bowser is Cersei. Yoshi is Arya. Ok, I'm going to stop now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Come back to this space for weekly recaps of \u003c/em>Game of Thrones\u003cem>, starting April 14, 2019!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/pop/110739/9-game-of-thrones-intro-parodies-to-tide-you-over-til-the-season-8-premiere","authors":["27"],"categories":["pop_5","pop_3"],"tags":["pop_3341","pop_73"],"featImg":"pop_110941","label":"pop"}},"programsReducer":{"possible":{"id":"possible","title":"Possible","info":"Possible is hosted by entrepreneur Reid Hoffman and writer Aria Finger. 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Each episode also includes a short fiction story generated by advanced AI GPT-4, serving as a thought-provoking springboard to speculate how humanity could leverage technology for good.","airtime":"SUN 2pm","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/08/possible-5gxfizEbKOJ-pbF5ASgxrs_.1400x1400.jpg","officialWebsiteLink":"https://www.possible.fm/","meta":{"site":"news","source":"Possible"},"link":"/radio/program/possible","subscribe":{"apple":"https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/possible/id1677184070","spotify":"https://open.spotify.com/show/730YpdUSNlMyPQwNnyjp4k"}},"1a":{"id":"1a","title":"1A","info":"1A is home to the national conversation. 1A brings on great guests and frames the best debate in ways that make you think, share and engage.","airtime":"MON-THU 11pm-12am","imageSrc":"https://ww2.kqed.org/radio/wp-content/uploads/sites/50/2018/04/1a.jpg","officialWebsiteLink":"https://the1a.org/","meta":{"site":"news","source":"npr"},"link":"/radio/program/1a","subscribe":{"npr":"https://rpb3r.app.goo.gl/RBrW","apple":"https://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?s=143441&mt=2&id=1188724250&at=11l79Y&ct=nprdirectory","tuneIn":"https://tunein.com/radio/1A-p947376/","rss":"https://feeds.npr.org/510316/podcast.xml"}},"all-things-considered":{"id":"all-things-considered","title":"All Things Considered","info":"Every weekday, \u003cem>All Things Considered\u003c/em> hosts Robert Siegel, Audie Cornish, Ari Shapiro, and Kelly McEvers present the program's trademark mix of news, interviews, commentaries, reviews, and offbeat features. Michel Martin hosts on the weekends.","airtime":"MON-FRI 1pm-2pm, 4:30pm-6:30pm\u003cbr />SAT-SUN 5pm-6pm","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/ATC_1400.jpg","officialWebsiteLink":"https://www.npr.org/programs/all-things-considered/","meta":{"site":"news","source":"npr"},"link":"/radio/program/all-things-considered"},"american-suburb-podcast":{"id":"american-suburb-podcast","title":"American Suburb: The Podcast","tagline":"The flip side of gentrification, told through one town","info":"Gentrification is changing cities across America, forcing people from neighborhoods they have long called home. Call them the displaced. Now those priced out of the Bay Area are looking for a better life in an unlikely place. American Suburb follows this migration to one California town along the Delta, 45 miles from San Francisco. 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And we’ll do it with your help! You ask the questions. You decide what Bay Curious investigates. And you join us on the journey to find the answers.","imageSrc":"https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/powerpress/1440_0017_BayCurious_iTunesTile_01.jpg","imageAlt":"\"KQED Bay Curious","officialWebsiteLink":"/news/series/baycurious","meta":{"site":"news","source":"kqed","order":"4"},"link":"/podcasts/baycurious","subscribe":{"apple":"https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bay-curious/id1172473406","npr":"https://www.npr.org/podcasts/500557090/bay-curious","rss":"https://ww2.kqed.org/news/category/bay-curious-podcast/feed/podcast","google":"https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly93dzIua3FlZC5vcmcvbmV3cy9jYXRlZ29yeS9iYXktY3VyaW91cy1wb2RjYXN0L2ZlZWQvcG9kY2FzdA","stitcher":"https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kqed/bay-curious","spotify":"https://open.spotify.com/show/6O76IdmhixfijmhTZLIJ8k"}},"bbc-world-service":{"id":"bbc-world-service","title":"BBC World Service","info":"The day's top stories from BBC News compiled twice daily in the week, once at weekends.","airtime":"MON-FRI 9pm-10pm, TUE-FRI 1am-2am","imageSrc":"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/2021/10/BBC_1400.jpg","officialWebsiteLink":"https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/live:bbc_world_service","meta":{"site":"news","source":"BBC World Service"},"link":"/radio/program/bbc-world-service","subscribe":{"apple":"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/global-news-podcast/id135067274?mt=2","tuneIn":"https://tunein.com/radio/BBC-World-Service-p455581/","rss":"https://podcasts.files.bbci.co.uk/p02nq0gn.rss"}},"code-switch-life-kit":{"id":"code-switch-life-kit","title":"Code Switch / Life Kit","info":"\u003cem>Code Switch\u003c/em>, which listeners will hear in the first part of the hour, has fearless and much-needed conversations about race. Hosted by journalists of color, the show tackles the subject of race head-on, exploring how it impacts every part of society — from politics and pop culture to history, sports and more.\u003cbr />\u003cbr />\u003cem>Life Kit\u003c/em>, which will be in the second part of the hour, guides you through spaces and feelings no one prepares you for — from finances to mental health, from workplace microaggressions to imposter syndrome, from relationships to parenting. The show features experts with real world experience and shares their knowledge. Because everyone needs a little help being human.\u003cbr />\u003cbr />\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/podcasts/510312/codeswitch\">\u003cem>Code Switch\u003c/em> offical site and podcast\u003c/a>\u003cbr />\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/lifekit\">\u003cem>Life Kit\u003c/em> offical site and podcast\u003c/a>\u003cbr />","airtime":"SUN 9pm-10pm","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/CodeSwitchLifeKit_StationGraphics_300x300EmailGraphic.png","meta":{"site":"radio","source":"npr"},"link":"/radio/program/code-switch-life-kit","subscribe":{"apple":"https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/1112190608?mt=2&at=11l79Y&ct=nprdirectory","google":"https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnByLm9yZy9yc3MvcG9kY2FzdC5waHA_aWQ9NTEwMzEy","spotify":"https://open.spotify.com/show/3bExJ9JQpkwNhoHvaIIuyV","rss":"https://feeds.npr.org/510312/podcast.xml"}},"commonwealth-club":{"id":"commonwealth-club","title":"Commonwealth Club of California Podcast","info":"The Commonwealth Club of California is the nation's oldest and largest public affairs forum. As a non-partisan forum, The Club brings to the public airwaves diverse viewpoints on important topics. The Club's weekly radio broadcast - the oldest in the U.S., dating back to 1924 - is carried across the nation on public radio stations and is now podcasting. Our website archive features audio of our recent programs, as well as selected speeches from our long and distinguished history. This podcast feed is usually updated twice a week and is always un-edited.","airtime":"THU 10pm, FRI 1am","imageSrc":"https://ww2.kqed.org/radio/wp-content/uploads/sites/50/2019/07/commonwealthclub.jpg","officialWebsiteLink":"https://www.commonwealthclub.org/podcasts","meta":{"site":"news","source":"Commonwealth Club of California"},"link":"/radio/program/commonwealth-club","subscribe":{"apple":"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/commonwealth-club-of-california-podcast/id976334034?mt=2","google":"https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cDovL3d3dy5jb21tb253ZWFsdGhjbHViLm9yZy9hdWRpby9wb2RjYXN0L3dlZWtseS54bWw","tuneIn":"https://tunein.com/radio/Commonwealth-Club-of-California-p1060/"}},"considerthis":{"id":"considerthis","title":"Consider This","tagline":"Make sense of the day","info":"Make sense of the day. Every weekday afternoon, Consider This helps you consider the major stories of the day in less than 15 minutes, featuring the reporting and storytelling resources of NPR. Plus, KQED’s Bianca Taylor brings you the local KQED news you need to know.","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/02/Consider-This_3000_V3-copy-scaled-1.jpg","imageAlt":"Consider This from NPR and KQED","officialWebsiteLink":"/podcasts/considerthis","meta":{"site":"news","source":"kqed","order":"7"},"link":"/podcasts/considerthis","subscribe":{"apple":"https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id1503226625?mt=2&at=11l79Y&ct=nprdirectory","npr":"https://rpb3r.app.goo.gl/coronavirusdaily","google":"https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5ucHIub3JnLzUxMDM1NS9wb2RjYXN0LnhtbA","spotify":"https://open.spotify.com/show/3Z6JdCS2d0eFEpXHKI6WqH"}},"forum":{"id":"forum","title":"Forum","tagline":"The conversation starts here","info":"KQED’s live call-in program discussing local, state, national and international issues, as well as in-depth interviews.","airtime":"MON-FRI 9am-11am, 10pm-11pm","imageSrc":"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/2022/06/forum-logo-900x900tile-1.gif","imageAlt":"KQED Forum with Mina Kim and Alexis Madrigal","officialWebsiteLink":"/forum","meta":{"site":"news","source":"kqed","order":"8"},"link":"/forum","subscribe":{"apple":"https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/kqeds-forum/id73329719","google":"https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5tZWdhcGhvbmUuZm0vS1FJTkM5NTU3MzgxNjMz","npr":"https://www.npr.org/podcasts/432307980/forum","stitcher":"https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kqedfm-kqeds-forum-podcast","rss":"https://feeds.megaphone.fm/KQINC9557381633"}},"freakonomics-radio":{"id":"freakonomics-radio","title":"Freakonomics Radio","info":"Freakonomics Radio is a one-hour award-winning podcast and public-radio project hosted by Stephen Dubner, with co-author Steve Levitt as a regular guest. It is produced in partnership with WNYC.","imageSrc":"https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2018/05/freakonomicsRadio.png","officialWebsiteLink":"http://freakonomics.com/","airtime":"SUN 1am-2am, SAT 3pm-4pm","meta":{"site":"radio","source":"WNYC"},"link":"/radio/program/freakonomics-radio","subscribe":{"npr":"https://rpb3r.app.goo.gl/4s8b","apple":"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/freakonomics-radio/id354668519","tuneIn":"https://tunein.com/podcasts/WNYC-Podcasts/Freakonomics-Radio-p272293/","rss":"https://feeds.feedburner.com/freakonomicsradio"}},"fresh-air":{"id":"fresh-air","title":"Fresh Air","info":"Hosted by Terry Gross, \u003cem>Fresh Air from WHYY\u003c/em> is the Peabody Award-winning weekday magazine of contemporary arts and issues. 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How I Built This weaves a narrative journey about innovators, entrepreneurs and idealists—and the movements they built.","imageSrc":"https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2018/05/howIBuiltThis.png","officialWebsiteLink":"https://www.npr.org/podcasts/510313/how-i-built-this","airtime":"SUN 7:30pm-8pm","meta":{"site":"news","source":"npr"},"link":"/radio/program/how-i-built-this","subscribe":{"npr":"https://rpb3r.app.goo.gl/3zxy","apple":"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/how-i-built-this-with-guy-raz/id1150510297?mt=2","tuneIn":"https://tunein.com/podcasts/Arts--Culture-Podcasts/How-I-Built-This-p910896/","rss":"https://feeds.npr.org/510313/podcast.xml"}},"inside-europe":{"id":"inside-europe","title":"Inside Europe","info":"Inside Europe, a one-hour weekly news magazine hosted by Helen Seeney and Keith Walker, explores the topical issues shaping the continent. 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