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"disqusTitle": "2017 Oscars: The Snubs and Surprises That Are Making the Internet Angry",
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"content": "\u003cp>This morning at the ungodly hour of 5:30am, the Oscar nominations were unveiled. You would think, this late in the award season, that most of the nominations would be locked in, but sometimes the unexpected happens and a surprise contender sneaks in and throws everything off. Here’s how this year’s nominations shook out:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Actress:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Isabelle Huppert, \u003cem>Elle\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nRuth Negga, \u003cem>Loving\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nNatalie Portman, \u003cem>Jackie\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nEmma Stone, \u003cem>La La Land\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nMeryl Streep, \u003cem>Florence Foster Jenkins\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Last year, Leonardo DiCaprio was finally liberated from being the subject of \u003ca href=\"http://observer.com/2016/02/11-hilarious-memes-of-leonardo-dicaprio-struggling-to-win-an-oscar/\">Wants-An-Oscar-So-Badly-But-Will-Never-Get-One memes\u003c/a>. Five-time nominee Amy Adams is looking like his replacement, as she's missed out on a nomination for her work in \u003cem>Arrival \u003c/em>(a sting that burns more, considering the film grabbed eight nominations, including Best Picture, tied for the second-most noms this year). Four-time nominee Annette Bening knows the feeling. Critics drooled over her work in \u003cem>20th Century Women\u003c/em>, but, alas, no love here.\u003cem> \u003c/em>On the flip side,\u003cem> \u003c/em>Isabelle Huppert, riding high after a surprise Golden Globe win last month, squeezed her way into this category. \u003cem>Comment dit-on \u003c/em>“Get it, girl”\u003cem> en français?\u003c/em> And some things remain constant: Meryl Streep is here with her 20th nomination, on the heels of \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/08/watch-meryl-streep-call-out-trump-defend-foreigners-and-the-press-in-emotional-golden-globes-speech/\">that epic Golden Globes speech\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Actor: \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Casey Affleck, \u003cem>Manchester by the Sea\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nAndrew Garfield, \u003cem>Hacksaw Ridge\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nRyan Gosling, \u003cem>La La Land\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nViggo Mortensen, \u003cem>Captain Fantastic\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nDenzel Washington, \u003cem>Fences\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Viggo Mortensen's inclusion for a movie most people have never heard of is a surprise, but an even bigger surprise is how Casey Affleck continues to be Teflon against \u003ca href=\"http://nymag.com/thecut/2016/11/why-the-casey-affleck-sex-harassment-allegations-wont-stick.html\">the sexual harassment allegations \u003c/a>out there. The same can't be said for Nate Parker, who received zero nominations for his much-buzzed-about film \u003cem>The Birth of a Nation.\u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/01/summer-recap-ryan-lochte-and-other-white-dudes-are-teflon-get-away-with-everything/\"> Being a white man has its perks.\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Supporting Actress:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Viola Davis, \u003cem>Fences\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nNaomie Harris, \u003cem>Moonlight\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nNicole Kidman, \u003cem>Lion\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nOctavia Spencer, \u003cem>Hidden Figures\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nMichelle Williams, \u003cem>Manchester by the Sea\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Coming off of two consecutive #OscarsSoWhite years, which saw all 20 acting nods go to white people, it's a pleasant surprise to see the Academy Awards actually recognize three deserving women of color. Sweetening that deal, Viola Davis now holds the record for most Oscar nominations for a black woman (this is her third). Another bright, yet petty note: Nicole Kidman now has more Oscar noms than Tom Cruise.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Supporting Actor:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mahershala Ali, \u003cem>Moonlight\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nJeff Bridges, \u003cem>Hell or High Water\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nLucas Hedges, \u003cem>Manchester by the Sea\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nDev Patel, \u003cem>Lion\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nMichael Shannon, \u003cem>Nocturnal Animals\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone thought Mahershala Ali had the Golden Globe in the bag, but then some random named Aaron Taylor-Johnson came out of nowhere and took the prize for his work in \u003cem>Nocturnal Animals. \u003c/em>People started wondering,\u003cem> Will this guy win the Oscar?\u003c/em> Not so much. His co-star Michael Shannon managed to edge him out for a nod at the last minute. I'm #TeamMoonlight all the way, but, if Ali doesn't win for some reason, here's hoping Shannon does. The outspoken -- \u003ca href=\"http://www.vulture.com/2016/11/michael-shannon-is-on-an-anti-trump-rage-tour.html\">to put it mildly\u003c/a> -- actor's speech could resemble \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/08/watch-meryl-streep-call-out-trump-defend-foreigners-and-the-press-in-emotional-golden-globes-speech/\">Meryl Streep at the Golden Globes\u003c/a> on steroids. Consider his reaction to today's honor a preview: \"Nice to get some good news in the midst of all the carnage, so to speak.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Director:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Denis Villeneuve (\u003cem>Arrival)\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nMel Gibson (\u003cem>Hacksaw Ridge)\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nDamien Chazelle (\u003cem>La La Land)\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nKenneth Lonergan (\u003cem>Manchester by the Sea)\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nBarry Jenkins (\u003cem>Moonlight)\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The big surprise here is that Hollywood thought this was a good time in world history to honor Mel Gibson, a man known for \u003ca href=\"http://gawker.com/5582644/all-the-terrible-things-mel-gibson-has-said-on-the-record\">his sloppy history\u003c/a> of anti-Semitism, racism, homophobia, misogyny, domestic abuse, etc. Gibson seems to have edged out big names Martin Scorsese (for \u003cem>Silence\u003c/em>) and Clint Eastwood (for \u003cem>Sully\u003c/em>). But enough about him: the amazing Barry Jenkins could become the first black person to win Best Director at the Oscars (he's already the first black man to get nominations for Best Picture, Best Screenplay, \u003cem>and\u003c/em> Best Director).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Original Song:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Audition (The Fools Who Dream),” \u003cem>La La Land\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n“Can’t Stop the Feeling,” \u003cem>Trolls\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n“City of Stars,” \u003cem>La La Land\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n“The Empty Chair,” \u003cem>Jim: The James Foley Story\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n“How Far I’ll Go,” \u003cem>Moana\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A big snub here is Pharrell Williams' “I See A Victory” from \u003cem>Hidden Figures\u003c/em>. Making this exclusion worse is that Justin Timberlake is nominated for \"Can't Stop the Feeling,\" which is essentially a giant rip-off of Pharrell's \"Happy\" and, more generally, a scourge on all those with eardrums. Another nomination that has many scratching their heads: Sting's \"The Empty Chair\" for a movie you're just now hearing about for the first time.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Film Editing:\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\n\u003cem>Arrival\u003cbr>\nHacksaw Ridge\u003cbr>\nHell or High Water\u003cbr>\nLa La Land\u003cbr>\nMoonlight\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You hear that sound? It's a glass ceiling breaking! \u003cem>Moonlight\u003c/em>’s Joi McMillion is the first black woman to ever be nominated in this category. And if the Academy knows what it's doing, she'll also be the first black woman to win.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Picture:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Arrival\u003cbr>\nFences\u003cbr>\nHacksaw Ridge\u003cbr>\nHell or High Water\u003cbr>\nHidden Figures\u003cbr>\nLa La Land\u003cbr>\nLion\u003cbr>\nManchester by the Sea\u003cbr>\nMoonlight\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Shockingly,\u003cem> \u003ca href=\"http://www.vulture.com/2017/01/jenna-bush-hager-apologizes-for-hidden-fences-snafu.html\">Hidden Fences\u003c/a>\u003c/em> didn't get a single nomination, despite being a movie that only exists \u003ca href=\"http://www.vulture.com/2017/01/jenna-bush-hager-apologizes-for-hidden-fences-snafu.html\" target=\"_blank\">in Jenna Bush's head\u003c/a>. Joking aside, most of these picks were expected, although some critics expected box-office juggernauts and crowd-favorites \u003cem>Finding Dory\u003c/em> and \u003cem>Deadpool\u003c/em> to sneak in. Fun fact: Amazon's \u003cem>Manchester by the Sea\u003c/em> becomes the first feature from a streaming-video company to be nominated in this category.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Animated Feature:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Kubo and the Two Strings\u003cbr>\nMoana\u003cbr>\nMy Life as a Zucchini\u003cbr>\nThe Red Turtle\u003cbr>\nZootopia\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despite making more than a billion dollars at the box office, \u003cem>Finding Dory\u003c/em> was left out of this category. Sequel haters gonna hate, hate, hate.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, that’s enough outrage for one post. Check out \u003ca href=\"http://oscar.go.com/nominees\">the full list of nominees\u003c/a>. And tune in to the Oscars on February 26, 2017.\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>This morning at the ungodly hour of 5:30am, the Oscar nominations were unveiled. You would think, this late in the award season, that most of the nominations would be locked in, but sometimes the unexpected happens and a surprise contender sneaks in and throws everything off. Here’s how this year’s nominations shook out:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Actress:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Isabelle Huppert, \u003cem>Elle\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nRuth Negga, \u003cem>Loving\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nNatalie Portman, \u003cem>Jackie\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nEmma Stone, \u003cem>La La Land\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nMeryl Streep, \u003cem>Florence Foster Jenkins\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Last year, Leonardo DiCaprio was finally liberated from being the subject of \u003ca href=\"http://observer.com/2016/02/11-hilarious-memes-of-leonardo-dicaprio-struggling-to-win-an-oscar/\">Wants-An-Oscar-So-Badly-But-Will-Never-Get-One memes\u003c/a>. Five-time nominee Amy Adams is looking like his replacement, as she's missed out on a nomination for her work in \u003cem>Arrival \u003c/em>(a sting that burns more, considering the film grabbed eight nominations, including Best Picture, tied for the second-most noms this year). Four-time nominee Annette Bening knows the feeling. Critics drooled over her work in \u003cem>20th Century Women\u003c/em>, but, alas, no love here.\u003cem> \u003c/em>On the flip side,\u003cem> \u003c/em>Isabelle Huppert, riding high after a surprise Golden Globe win last month, squeezed her way into this category. \u003cem>Comment dit-on \u003c/em>“Get it, girl”\u003cem> en français?\u003c/em> And some things remain constant: Meryl Streep is here with her 20th nomination, on the heels of \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/08/watch-meryl-streep-call-out-trump-defend-foreigners-and-the-press-in-emotional-golden-globes-speech/\">that epic Golden Globes speech\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Actor: \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Casey Affleck, \u003cem>Manchester by the Sea\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nAndrew Garfield, \u003cem>Hacksaw Ridge\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nRyan Gosling, \u003cem>La La Land\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nViggo Mortensen, \u003cem>Captain Fantastic\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nDenzel Washington, \u003cem>Fences\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Viggo Mortensen's inclusion for a movie most people have never heard of is a surprise, but an even bigger surprise is how Casey Affleck continues to be Teflon against \u003ca href=\"http://nymag.com/thecut/2016/11/why-the-casey-affleck-sex-harassment-allegations-wont-stick.html\">the sexual harassment allegations \u003c/a>out there. The same can't be said for Nate Parker, who received zero nominations for his much-buzzed-about film \u003cem>The Birth of a Nation.\u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/01/summer-recap-ryan-lochte-and-other-white-dudes-are-teflon-get-away-with-everything/\"> Being a white man has its perks.\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Supporting Actress:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Viola Davis, \u003cem>Fences\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nNaomie Harris, \u003cem>Moonlight\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nNicole Kidman, \u003cem>Lion\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nOctavia Spencer, \u003cem>Hidden Figures\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nMichelle Williams, \u003cem>Manchester by the Sea\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Coming off of two consecutive #OscarsSoWhite years, which saw all 20 acting nods go to white people, it's a pleasant surprise to see the Academy Awards actually recognize three deserving women of color. Sweetening that deal, Viola Davis now holds the record for most Oscar nominations for a black woman (this is her third). Another bright, yet petty note: Nicole Kidman now has more Oscar noms than Tom Cruise.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Supporting Actor:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mahershala Ali, \u003cem>Moonlight\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nJeff Bridges, \u003cem>Hell or High Water\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nLucas Hedges, \u003cem>Manchester by the Sea\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nDev Patel, \u003cem>Lion\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nMichael Shannon, \u003cem>Nocturnal Animals\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone thought Mahershala Ali had the Golden Globe in the bag, but then some random named Aaron Taylor-Johnson came out of nowhere and took the prize for his work in \u003cem>Nocturnal Animals. \u003c/em>People started wondering,\u003cem> Will this guy win the Oscar?\u003c/em> Not so much. His co-star Michael Shannon managed to edge him out for a nod at the last minute. I'm #TeamMoonlight all the way, but, if Ali doesn't win for some reason, here's hoping Shannon does. The outspoken -- \u003ca href=\"http://www.vulture.com/2016/11/michael-shannon-is-on-an-anti-trump-rage-tour.html\">to put it mildly\u003c/a> -- actor's speech could resemble \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/08/watch-meryl-streep-call-out-trump-defend-foreigners-and-the-press-in-emotional-golden-globes-speech/\">Meryl Streep at the Golden Globes\u003c/a> on steroids. Consider his reaction to today's honor a preview: \"Nice to get some good news in the midst of all the carnage, so to speak.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Director:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Denis Villeneuve (\u003cem>Arrival)\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nMel Gibson (\u003cem>Hacksaw Ridge)\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nDamien Chazelle (\u003cem>La La Land)\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nKenneth Lonergan (\u003cem>Manchester by the Sea)\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\nBarry Jenkins (\u003cem>Moonlight)\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The big surprise here is that Hollywood thought this was a good time in world history to honor Mel Gibson, a man known for \u003ca href=\"http://gawker.com/5582644/all-the-terrible-things-mel-gibson-has-said-on-the-record\">his sloppy history\u003c/a> of anti-Semitism, racism, homophobia, misogyny, domestic abuse, etc. Gibson seems to have edged out big names Martin Scorsese (for \u003cem>Silence\u003c/em>) and Clint Eastwood (for \u003cem>Sully\u003c/em>). But enough about him: the amazing Barry Jenkins could become the first black person to win Best Director at the Oscars (he's already the first black man to get nominations for Best Picture, Best Screenplay, \u003cem>and\u003c/em> Best Director).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Original Song:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Audition (The Fools Who Dream),” \u003cem>La La Land\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n“Can’t Stop the Feeling,” \u003cem>Trolls\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n“City of Stars,” \u003cem>La La Land\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n“The Empty Chair,” \u003cem>Jim: The James Foley Story\u003c/em>\u003cbr>\n“How Far I’ll Go,” \u003cem>Moana\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A big snub here is Pharrell Williams' “I See A Victory” from \u003cem>Hidden Figures\u003c/em>. Making this exclusion worse is that Justin Timberlake is nominated for \"Can't Stop the Feeling,\" which is essentially a giant rip-off of Pharrell's \"Happy\" and, more generally, a scourge on all those with eardrums. Another nomination that has many scratching their heads: Sting's \"The Empty Chair\" for a movie you're just now hearing about for the first time.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Film Editing:\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\n\u003cem>Arrival\u003cbr>\nHacksaw Ridge\u003cbr>\nHell or High Water\u003cbr>\nLa La Land\u003cbr>\nMoonlight\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You hear that sound? It's a glass ceiling breaking! \u003cem>Moonlight\u003c/em>’s Joi McMillion is the first black woman to ever be nominated in this category. And if the Academy knows what it's doing, she'll also be the first black woman to win.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Picture:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Arrival\u003cbr>\nFences\u003cbr>\nHacksaw Ridge\u003cbr>\nHell or High Water\u003cbr>\nHidden Figures\u003cbr>\nLa La Land\u003cbr>\nLion\u003cbr>\nManchester by the Sea\u003cbr>\nMoonlight\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Shockingly,\u003cem> \u003ca href=\"http://www.vulture.com/2017/01/jenna-bush-hager-apologizes-for-hidden-fences-snafu.html\">Hidden Fences\u003c/a>\u003c/em> didn't get a single nomination, despite being a movie that only exists \u003ca href=\"http://www.vulture.com/2017/01/jenna-bush-hager-apologizes-for-hidden-fences-snafu.html\" target=\"_blank\">in Jenna Bush's head\u003c/a>. Joking aside, most of these picks were expected, although some critics expected box-office juggernauts and crowd-favorites \u003cem>Finding Dory\u003c/em> and \u003cem>Deadpool\u003c/em> to sneak in. Fun fact: Amazon's \u003cem>Manchester by the Sea\u003c/em> becomes the first feature from a streaming-video company to be nominated in this category.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Best Animated Feature:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Kubo and the Two Strings\u003cbr>\nMoana\u003cbr>\nMy Life as a Zucchini\u003cbr>\nThe Red Turtle\u003cbr>\nZootopia\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despite making more than a billion dollars at the box office, \u003cem>Finding Dory\u003c/em> was left out of this category. Sequel haters gonna hate, hate, hate.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, that’s enough outrage for one post. Check out \u003ca href=\"http://oscar.go.com/nominees\">the full list of nominees\u003c/a>. And tune in to the Oscars on February 26, 2017.\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Victoria' Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: All The Single Ladies",
"title": "'Victoria' Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: All The Single Ladies",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>Our episode starts with a blinged-out, bored Victoria riding around town. Some people gather to watch her carriage pass:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60155\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2017-01-22 at 1.51.04 PM\" width=\"597\" height=\"579\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM.png 597w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM-160x155.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM-240x233.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM-375x364.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM-520x504.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM-32x32.png 32w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 597px) 100vw, 597px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But, elsewhere, a much larger crowd gathers to protest:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60156\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2017-01-22 at 1.50.51 PM\" width=\"588\" height=\"578\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM.png 588w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-160x157.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-240x236.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-375x369.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-520x511.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-32x32.png 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-50x50.png 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-64x64.png 64w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 588px) 100vw, 588px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"One Man, One Vote,\" the signs read. A reasonable request, right? Apparently not; soldiers aim rifles at the protestors, yell \"In the name of the Queen! Fire!!!\" and shoot everyone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/f8a.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60157\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/f8a.gif\" alt=\"f8a\" width=\"355\" height=\"186\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Buckingham Palace, Victoria and Lord M agree that Queen Elizabeth I had it all figured out by staying single forever. Marriage just leads to unhappiness, divorce, or getting cuckolded by Lord Byron, so why bother?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The following day, Victoria's uncle on her mother's side, Leopold, arrives to say passive-aggressive things about her height (we get it! she's short!) and how he would be living in Buckingham Palace if his wife hadn't died during childbirth (she preceded Victoria in the line of succession). For a country known for its stuffy manners, these people sure don't have any.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria's mom doesn't waste any time conspiring with her brother about making Victoria marry their other sibling's son, Albert. If you're following along, yes, that means Albert is Victoria's first cousin.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/gross5_zps43ad1395.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60167\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/gross5_zps43ad1395.gif\" alt=\"gross5_zps43ad1395\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/raw.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60170\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/raw.gif\" alt=\"raw\" width=\"244\" height=\"230\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-1.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60169\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-1.gif\" alt=\"giphy (1)\" width=\"310\" height=\"205\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Disgusted-Grandma.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60166\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Disgusted-Grandma.gif\" alt=\"Disgusted-Grandma\" width=\"389\" height=\"221\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And before you leave a comment, yes, I'm aware that this sort of thing occurs often in royal families to keep alliances strong, but it doesn't make the fact that Victoria and Albert share the same grandparents any less gross.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Never one to miss an opportunity to beat a dead horse, Sir John randomly chimes in from the sidelines: \"YOU NEED A HUSBAND!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Anne-Hathaway-Needs-Everyone-To-Shut-Up-In-Disneys-The-Princess-Diaries.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60171\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Anne-Hathaway-Needs-Everyone-To-Shut-Up-In-Disneys-The-Princess-Diaries.gif\" alt=\"Anne-Hathaway-Needs-Everyone-To-Shut-Up-In-Disneys-The-Princess-Diaries\" width=\"500\" height=\"265\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria announces that they can continue discussing how she's nothing without a husband, but that she has to go govern now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mx3npl6PjH1qfh70bo4_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60172\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mx3npl6PjH1qfh70bo4_250.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_mx3npl6PjH1qfh70bo4_250\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Uncle Scar is upset that he's not the only power-hungry uncle around. Scar's wife has a solution: why doesn't Uncle Scar try to make Victoria marry George, one of the first cousins on her father's side?!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/1456.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60173\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/1456.gif\" alt=\"1456\" width=\"350\" height=\"263\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Lord M finds Victoria to tell her two things:\u003c/p>\n\u003col>\n\u003cli>Ew! Your first cousin?!\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>Some starving poor people are protesting for their civil rights and getting shot.\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ol>\n\u003cp>Victoria is like, \u003cem>Oh, that's weird. Anyway, I can't wait to dance with you at the opera tonight! \u003c/em>Somewhere, Marie Antoinette's headless ghost is floating around, wailing, \u003cem>You chop off my head for wanting to share some cake, but she gets away with this? Come on!!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Downstairs, the servants pick sides -- #TeamRussianGroper, #TeamCousinAlbert, #TeamCousinGeorge, #TeamLordM -- and place bets. They're all wrong. \u003ca href=\"http://foreveryoungadult.com/_uploads/images2/gilmoregirlsjessandrory.jpg\">#TeamJess\u003c/a> all the way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the opera, Russian Groper and Cousin George fight over Victoria with mean looks, while Leopold creepily stalks Victoria through binoculars.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After the performance, Uncle Leopold threatens Victoria with the idea that, if she doesn't take the safe, incestuous choice with Albert and instead marries Lord M, protestors will burn everything to the ground and probably kill her. Victoria obliterates him back into his proper place with this royal clapback:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"I think you forget that I'm of a royal line that stretches back 1,000 years, whilst you're the king of Belgium, a country that did not exist a decade ago.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/xgz9nkR.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60181\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/xgz9nkR.gif\" alt=\"xgz9nkR\" width=\"320\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the palace, lead maid Ms. Jenkins gets an upsetting note from her sister, but doesn't want to talk about it. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ (Dear \u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em> writers, you don't have to force a \"downstairs\" narrative in an attempt to be \u003cem>Downton\u003c/em>. You'll never be \u003cem>Downton\u003c/em>, and that's okay.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Victoria and Lord M trot around on horseback, talking about boys. The verdict: Russian Groper is hot and gets what it's like to be a spoiled royal, but is he too foreign? As for Cousin George, he's the worst, but an incestuous English marriage would be super popular with the people. Decisions, decisions.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You know who else is English? Lord M! He and Victoria stop just short of winking at each other and licking their lips. (Fun fact: in real life, Lord M was 40 YEARS OLDER than Victoria, and they didn't like each other in that way. But reality makes for dull television, so here we are.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere in the palace, Victoria's mom complains to her brother about how poor she feels and asks for money. He quickly delivers a NOPE, reminds her she lives in a frickin' palace, and recommends she dump Sir John and get back on Victoria's good side. Victoria's mom blinks slowly and responds, \u003cem>No, but for real, can I borrow ten dollars?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sometime later, Victoria is out in public to unveil a monument to her dead father. There are more soldiers than usual because the protestors are gaining steam. Some are even talking about pushing for women's right to vote. At this idea, Victoria laughs, \"Now, you are teasing me!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_inline_ohfhx3b1UC1uqemwj_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60182\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_inline_ohfhx3b1UC1uqemwj_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_inline_ohfhx3b1UC1uqemwj_500\" width=\"340\" height=\"230\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Russian Groper and Cousin George fight over who gets to help Victoria ascend a single small step. Victoria doesn't need help though; as we learned last week, her new rebel move is to confront staircases without holding onto people. You go, girl!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The moment she unveils the monument, protestors erupt in shouts and Victoria is whisked away to safety. Leopold pops up out of nowhere to remind Lord M that he's old and should stop flirting with his niece.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, Victoria plays with Lord M's telescope (this is not a dirty euphemism), while, across town, Lord M holds important papers and stares off into the distance. They're basically reenacting this scene, but with way more sexual tension:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_iRdgGZ6Xc\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Downstairs, the Italian chef is losing his hotness by the syllable, as he badgers Babyface Maid over her mysterious past. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ (Again, \u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em> writers, we don't care about these forced B plots.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, spooked by his conversation with Leopold, Lord M stays away from Buckingham Palace, but Victoria, not well-versed in play-hard-to-get or he's-just-not-that-into-you, jumps in an unmarked carriage and goes to his house. Their interaction goes something like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Victoria: \u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-3.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60191\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-3.gif\" alt=\"giphy (3)\" width=\"480\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Lord M:\u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mc5v5y3MTC1qgbguro5_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60192\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mc5v5y3MTC1qgbguro5_250.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_mc5v5y3MTC1qgbguro5_250\" width=\"245\" height=\"170\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Victoria:\u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/hair-push-back.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60193\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/hair-push-back.gif\" alt=\"hair-push-back\" width=\"500\" height=\"244\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Lord M:\u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-4.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60194\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-4.gif\" alt=\"giphy (4)\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong> Victoria:\u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Mean-Girls-mean-girls-25469651-500-210.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60196\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Mean-Girls-mean-girls-25469651-500-210.gif\" alt=\"Mean-Girls-mean-girls-25469651-500-210\" width=\"500\" height=\"210\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Lord M:\u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/mean-girls-11th-anniversary-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60195\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/mean-girls-11th-anniversary-gif.gif\" alt=\"mean-girls-11th-anniversary-gif\" width=\"640\" height=\"358\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria opens up about how she thought Lord M was just a replacement father figure, but that she realized she wants him to be her daddy, in a sexual sense, too! Lord M says he can't do that because he's super busy being sad about his cheating, dead wife for the rest of his life.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/be3c452f34164db6001c8311f255138a.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60197\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/be3c452f34164db6001c8311f255138a.gif\" alt=\"be3c452f34164db6001c8311f255138a\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Victoria changes up her look (because nothing helps one get over a breakup more than a fierce makeover).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60199\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2017-01-22 at 5.09.27 PM\" width=\"750\" height=\"388\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM.png 750w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM-160x83.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM-240x124.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM-375x194.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM-520x269.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 750px) 100vw, 750px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Violet_come_through.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60200\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Violet_come_through.gif\" alt=\"Violet_come_through\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A bunch of dignitaries arrive for a ball in Leopold's honor. Russian Groper and Cousin George fight over who will dance with Victoria first. Victoria chooses Russian Groper because hotness trumps foreignness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In some hallway, Babyface Maid gets Mrs. Jenkins to spill on that letter she received from her sister. Turns out she has a nephew, whom she hasn't seen in a long while because servants don't get PTO privileges. He always said he would come visit her and he's finally coming to London....\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_lsb8q8AmRS1r3v6f2o1_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60208\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_lsb8q8AmRS1r3v6f2o1_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_lsb8q8AmRS1r3v6f2o1_500\" width=\"495\" height=\"249\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>... \"to be hanged and then to be cut open while he's still alive.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit-omg.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60209\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit-omg.gif\" alt=\"brit omg\" width=\"500\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Turns out he was part of the protesting movement. WOMP.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in the ballroom, Lord M asks for a dance, even though he just stomped on Victoria's daddy-issue-filled heart. He brings up the relationship Queen Elizabeth I had with the Earl of Leicester. Like their situation, it was a will-they-won't-they, forbidden love thing that involved a dead wife. Victoria imagines the point of this story is to say, \u003cem>Screw it! Let's French kiss like it's 1559!\u003c/em> But his point is actually,\u003cem> I'm still just not that into you. Also: did you know I had a wife who cheated on me with Lord Byron?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Next up in the dancing request line: Sir John, who spends the entire song telling Victoria she needs to snag a husband to \"keep her behavior in check\" and pop out some babies already. Get some new material, dude.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Russian Groper gives Victoria a fancy gift with their initials spelled out in diamonds, and then announces that he's going back to Russia to marry some princess his dad picked out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/huh-what.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60210\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/huh-what.gif\" alt=\"huh-what\" width=\"250\" height=\"203\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So much for #TeamRussianGroper.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Uncle Scar's pad, he's still grumpy over being a 67-year-old heir, who'll probably never be King. His wife cheers him up: \"Remember, even healthy women can die in childbirth!\" Wow. I feel really bad for \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frederica_of_Mecklenburg-Strelitz\">the real-life woman\u003c/a> this character is based on. After a cursory dive into her Wikipedia page, I declare that this depiction is unfair.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the palace, Victoria tells Mrs. Jenkins and Babyface Maid that she wishes she was a man because corsets suck. They both put up praise hands and say, \u003cem>Amen! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mrs. Jenkins falls down for no reason and asks to be excused. Victoria is like, \u003cem>What's her damage? \u003c/em>Babyface Maid spills all the details about Mrs. Jenkins' nephew and how most non-royals think the punishment for protesting should be a bit more lenient than being sliced up and gutted. Victoria is like, \u003cem>Hmmmmm, maybe!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria finds Lord M and says she wants to sign a petition on whitehouse.gov or something to save the protestors' lives. He's like, \u003cem>Ummm, you're the Queen. You can just commute their sentences and set them up with new lives in Australia.\u003c/em> She's like, \u003cem>Cool, we'll do that, then!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On a roll, Victoria runs off to take care of another bit of business. She informs Sir John and her mom that she will grant Sir John's request for money and a title in exchange for disappearing forever and ever. Shocked, Victoria's mom turns to Sir John to find out if he's really willing to drop her for a few coins. Sir John's response:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/giphy-5.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-20781\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/giphy-5.gif\" alt=\"kanye shrug gif\" width=\"464\" height=\"264\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that day, Victoria tries to make amends with her mother: \u003cem>Hey, sorry about sending away your best friend / maybe lover and for humiliating your cancer-stricken friend and speeding up her death. Here's some fancy lace and a bigger allowance. We cool? \u003c/em>Victoria's mom decides that they are.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Victoria is painting a portrait of Elizabeth I. She tells Lord M she's decided to take a page from the former Queen's playbook and be single forever, while getting some on the side (*wink*). For the hundredth time, Lord M turns her down and tells her to maybe consider marrying her cousin Albert. This Albert better be hot, geez.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some time later, Victoria is playing a dramatic song on the piano, while everyone sits around her, pretending not to be bored. Cut to two men descending stairs. Their boots have tassels on them. Their faces have mustaches on them. They walk in and everyone stands, but Victoria is too focused on her music to notice.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Albert (rudely, in my opinion) walks up and distracts her mid-concerto. He says her name. With her eyes, she says, \u003cem>UM, WOAH, TOTALLY COOL WITH THIS MARRIAGE THING NOW.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/omy.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60220\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/omy.gif\" alt=\"omy\" width=\"327\" height=\"259\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: Russian Groper. \u003c/strong>What a tease!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: Victoria's Mom. \u003c/strong>Losing all your friends and being left with a daughter who hates you must be tough. Here's a pity prize to go with the fancy lace.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>BRONZE: \u003cstrong>The Protestors. \u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>What do they want? Basic voting rights! When do they want it? Preferably before they all die of starvation! Keep fighting, comrades.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>SILVER: \u003c/strong>\u003cstrong> Elizabeth I. \u003c/strong>For inspiring independent women that they don't need a man (unless he's super-duper hot).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>GOLD: \u003cstrong>Mrs. Jenkins' Nephew's Guts. \u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>They get to stay inside of him! Yay!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Until next week! If you miss me, \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/author/ehapsis/\">read some of my other work \u003c/a>or \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">follow me on Twitter @xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108303/victoria-season-3-finale-recap-matchmaker-matchmaker\">'Victoria' Season 3 Finale Recap: Matchmaker, Matchmaker\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108301/victoria-season-3-episode-7-recap-california-love\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 7 Recap: California Love\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108299/victoria-season-3-episode-6-recap-love-on-the-brain\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 6 Recap: Love on the Brain\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108293/victoria-season-3-episode-5-recap-on-the-road-again\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 5 Recap: On The Road Again\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108291/victoria-season-3-episode-4-recap-ill-be-missing-you\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 4 Recap: I'll Be Missing You\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108289/victoria-season-3-episode-3-recap-la-isla-bonita\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 3 Recap: La Isla Bonita\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108287/victoria-season-3-episode-2-recap-the-guns-of-brixton\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 2 Recap: The Guns of Brixton\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108284/victoria-season-3-premiere-recap-god-save-the-queen\">'Victoria' Season 3 Premiere Recap: God Save The Queen\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97779/victoria-season-2-finale-recap-its-a-hard-knock-life\">'Victoria' Season 2 Finale Recap: It's a Hard-Knock Life\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97777/victoria-season-2-episode-6-recap-somewhere-over-the-rainbow\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 6 Recap: Somewhere Over The Rainbow\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97775/victoria-season-2-episode-5-recap-lost-and-found\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 5 Recap: Lost and Found\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97773/victoria-season-2-episode-4-recap-people-are-people\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 4 Recap: People Are People\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97771/victoria-season-2-episode-3-recap-daddy-issues\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 3 Recap: Daddy Issues\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97769/victoria-season-2-episode-2-recap-puppy-love\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 2 Recap: Puppy Love\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97767/victoria-season-2-premiere-recap-baby-its-cold-outside\">'Victoria' Season 2 Premiere Recap: Baby It's Cold Outside\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/56546/victoria-season-1-finale-recap-bye-bye-baby-blues\">'Victoria' Season 1 Finale Recap: Bye Bye Baby Blues\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/02/19/victoria-season-1-episode-6-recap-cmon-ride-the-train/\">'Victoria' Season 1, Episode 6 Recap: C'mon Ride the Train\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/02/12/pbs-victoria-season-1-episode-5-recap-ill-make-love-to-you/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 5 Recap: I’ll Make Love to You\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/02/05/pbs-victoria-season-1-episode-4-recap-wedding-bell-blues/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Wedding Bell Blues\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/29/pbs-victoria-season-1-episode-3-recap-youre-so-vain/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: You’re So Vain\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/22/victoria-season-1-episode-2-recap-all-the-single-ladies/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: All The Single Ladies\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/15/victoria-season-1-premiere-recap-bow-down/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1 Premiere Recap: Bow Down\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Victoria vows to be single forever (unless a really hot guy comes along).",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Our episode starts with a blinged-out, bored Victoria riding around town. Some people gather to watch her carriage pass:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60155\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2017-01-22 at 1.51.04 PM\" width=\"597\" height=\"579\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM.png 597w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM-160x155.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM-240x233.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM-375x364.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM-520x504.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.51.04-PM-32x32.png 32w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 597px) 100vw, 597px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But, elsewhere, a much larger crowd gathers to protest:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60156\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2017-01-22 at 1.50.51 PM\" width=\"588\" height=\"578\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM.png 588w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-160x157.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-240x236.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-375x369.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-520x511.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-32x32.png 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-50x50.png 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-1.50.51-PM-64x64.png 64w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 588px) 100vw, 588px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"One Man, One Vote,\" the signs read. A reasonable request, right? Apparently not; soldiers aim rifles at the protestors, yell \"In the name of the Queen! Fire!!!\" and shoot everyone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/f8a.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60157\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/f8a.gif\" alt=\"f8a\" width=\"355\" height=\"186\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at Buckingham Palace, Victoria and Lord M agree that Queen Elizabeth I had it all figured out by staying single forever. Marriage just leads to unhappiness, divorce, or getting cuckolded by Lord Byron, so why bother?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The following day, Victoria's uncle on her mother's side, Leopold, arrives to say passive-aggressive things about her height (we get it! she's short!) and how he would be living in Buckingham Palace if his wife hadn't died during childbirth (she preceded Victoria in the line of succession). For a country known for its stuffy manners, these people sure don't have any.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria's mom doesn't waste any time conspiring with her brother about making Victoria marry their other sibling's son, Albert. If you're following along, yes, that means Albert is Victoria's first cousin.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/gross5_zps43ad1395.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60167\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/gross5_zps43ad1395.gif\" alt=\"gross5_zps43ad1395\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/raw.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60170\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/raw.gif\" alt=\"raw\" width=\"244\" height=\"230\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-1.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60169\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-1.gif\" alt=\"giphy (1)\" width=\"310\" height=\"205\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Disgusted-Grandma.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60166\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Disgusted-Grandma.gif\" alt=\"Disgusted-Grandma\" width=\"389\" height=\"221\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And before you leave a comment, yes, I'm aware that this sort of thing occurs often in royal families to keep alliances strong, but it doesn't make the fact that Victoria and Albert share the same grandparents any less gross.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Never one to miss an opportunity to beat a dead horse, Sir John randomly chimes in from the sidelines: \"YOU NEED A HUSBAND!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Anne-Hathaway-Needs-Everyone-To-Shut-Up-In-Disneys-The-Princess-Diaries.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60171\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Anne-Hathaway-Needs-Everyone-To-Shut-Up-In-Disneys-The-Princess-Diaries.gif\" alt=\"Anne-Hathaway-Needs-Everyone-To-Shut-Up-In-Disneys-The-Princess-Diaries\" width=\"500\" height=\"265\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria announces that they can continue discussing how she's nothing without a husband, but that she has to go govern now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mx3npl6PjH1qfh70bo4_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60172\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mx3npl6PjH1qfh70bo4_250.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_mx3npl6PjH1qfh70bo4_250\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Uncle Scar is upset that he's not the only power-hungry uncle around. Scar's wife has a solution: why doesn't Uncle Scar try to make Victoria marry George, one of the first cousins on her father's side?!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/1456.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60173\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/1456.gif\" alt=\"1456\" width=\"350\" height=\"263\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Lord M finds Victoria to tell her two things:\u003c/p>\n\u003col>\n\u003cli>Ew! Your first cousin?!\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>Some starving poor people are protesting for their civil rights and getting shot.\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ol>\n\u003cp>Victoria is like, \u003cem>Oh, that's weird. Anyway, I can't wait to dance with you at the opera tonight! \u003c/em>Somewhere, Marie Antoinette's headless ghost is floating around, wailing, \u003cem>You chop off my head for wanting to share some cake, but she gets away with this? Come on!!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Downstairs, the servants pick sides -- #TeamRussianGroper, #TeamCousinAlbert, #TeamCousinGeorge, #TeamLordM -- and place bets. They're all wrong. \u003ca href=\"http://foreveryoungadult.com/_uploads/images2/gilmoregirlsjessandrory.jpg\">#TeamJess\u003c/a> all the way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the opera, Russian Groper and Cousin George fight over Victoria with mean looks, while Leopold creepily stalks Victoria through binoculars.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After the performance, Uncle Leopold threatens Victoria with the idea that, if she doesn't take the safe, incestuous choice with Albert and instead marries Lord M, protestors will burn everything to the ground and probably kill her. Victoria obliterates him back into his proper place with this royal clapback:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"I think you forget that I'm of a royal line that stretches back 1,000 years, whilst you're the king of Belgium, a country that did not exist a decade ago.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/xgz9nkR.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60181\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/xgz9nkR.gif\" alt=\"xgz9nkR\" width=\"320\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the palace, lead maid Ms. Jenkins gets an upsetting note from her sister, but doesn't want to talk about it. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ (Dear \u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em> writers, you don't have to force a \"downstairs\" narrative in an attempt to be \u003cem>Downton\u003c/em>. You'll never be \u003cem>Downton\u003c/em>, and that's okay.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Victoria and Lord M trot around on horseback, talking about boys. The verdict: Russian Groper is hot and gets what it's like to be a spoiled royal, but is he too foreign? As for Cousin George, he's the worst, but an incestuous English marriage would be super popular with the people. Decisions, decisions.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You know who else is English? Lord M! He and Victoria stop just short of winking at each other and licking their lips. (Fun fact: in real life, Lord M was 40 YEARS OLDER than Victoria, and they didn't like each other in that way. But reality makes for dull television, so here we are.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere in the palace, Victoria's mom complains to her brother about how poor she feels and asks for money. He quickly delivers a NOPE, reminds her she lives in a frickin' palace, and recommends she dump Sir John and get back on Victoria's good side. Victoria's mom blinks slowly and responds, \u003cem>No, but for real, can I borrow ten dollars?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sometime later, Victoria is out in public to unveil a monument to her dead father. There are more soldiers than usual because the protestors are gaining steam. Some are even talking about pushing for women's right to vote. At this idea, Victoria laughs, \"Now, you are teasing me!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_inline_ohfhx3b1UC1uqemwj_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60182\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_inline_ohfhx3b1UC1uqemwj_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_inline_ohfhx3b1UC1uqemwj_500\" width=\"340\" height=\"230\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Russian Groper and Cousin George fight over who gets to help Victoria ascend a single small step. Victoria doesn't need help though; as we learned last week, her new rebel move is to confront staircases without holding onto people. You go, girl!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The moment she unveils the monument, protestors erupt in shouts and Victoria is whisked away to safety. Leopold pops up out of nowhere to remind Lord M that he's old and should stop flirting with his niece.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, Victoria plays with Lord M's telescope (this is not a dirty euphemism), while, across town, Lord M holds important papers and stares off into the distance. They're basically reenacting this scene, but with way more sexual tension:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/l_iRdgGZ6Xc'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/l_iRdgGZ6Xc'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Downstairs, the Italian chef is losing his hotness by the syllable, as he badgers Babyface Maid over her mysterious past. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ (Again, \u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em> writers, we don't care about these forced B plots.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, spooked by his conversation with Leopold, Lord M stays away from Buckingham Palace, but Victoria, not well-versed in play-hard-to-get or he's-just-not-that-into-you, jumps in an unmarked carriage and goes to his house. Their interaction goes something like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Victoria: \u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-3.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60191\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-3.gif\" alt=\"giphy (3)\" width=\"480\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Lord M:\u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mc5v5y3MTC1qgbguro5_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60192\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mc5v5y3MTC1qgbguro5_250.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_mc5v5y3MTC1qgbguro5_250\" width=\"245\" height=\"170\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Victoria:\u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/hair-push-back.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60193\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/hair-push-back.gif\" alt=\"hair-push-back\" width=\"500\" height=\"244\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Lord M:\u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-4.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60194\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-4.gif\" alt=\"giphy (4)\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong> Victoria:\u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Mean-Girls-mean-girls-25469651-500-210.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60196\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Mean-Girls-mean-girls-25469651-500-210.gif\" alt=\"Mean-Girls-mean-girls-25469651-500-210\" width=\"500\" height=\"210\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>Lord M:\u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/mean-girls-11th-anniversary-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60195\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/mean-girls-11th-anniversary-gif.gif\" alt=\"mean-girls-11th-anniversary-gif\" width=\"640\" height=\"358\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria opens up about how she thought Lord M was just a replacement father figure, but that she realized she wants him to be her daddy, in a sexual sense, too! Lord M says he can't do that because he's super busy being sad about his cheating, dead wife for the rest of his life.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/be3c452f34164db6001c8311f255138a.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60197\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/be3c452f34164db6001c8311f255138a.gif\" alt=\"be3c452f34164db6001c8311f255138a\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Victoria changes up her look (because nothing helps one get over a breakup more than a fierce makeover).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60199\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2017-01-22 at 5.09.27 PM\" width=\"750\" height=\"388\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM.png 750w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM-160x83.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM-240x124.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM-375x194.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-22-at-5.09.27-PM-520x269.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 750px) 100vw, 750px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Violet_come_through.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60200\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Violet_come_through.gif\" alt=\"Violet_come_through\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A bunch of dignitaries arrive for a ball in Leopold's honor. Russian Groper and Cousin George fight over who will dance with Victoria first. Victoria chooses Russian Groper because hotness trumps foreignness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In some hallway, Babyface Maid gets Mrs. Jenkins to spill on that letter she received from her sister. Turns out she has a nephew, whom she hasn't seen in a long while because servants don't get PTO privileges. He always said he would come visit her and he's finally coming to London....\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_lsb8q8AmRS1r3v6f2o1_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60208\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_lsb8q8AmRS1r3v6f2o1_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_lsb8q8AmRS1r3v6f2o1_500\" width=\"495\" height=\"249\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>... \"to be hanged and then to be cut open while he's still alive.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit-omg.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60209\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit-omg.gif\" alt=\"brit omg\" width=\"500\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Turns out he was part of the protesting movement. WOMP.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in the ballroom, Lord M asks for a dance, even though he just stomped on Victoria's daddy-issue-filled heart. He brings up the relationship Queen Elizabeth I had with the Earl of Leicester. Like their situation, it was a will-they-won't-they, forbidden love thing that involved a dead wife. Victoria imagines the point of this story is to say, \u003cem>Screw it! Let's French kiss like it's 1559!\u003c/em> But his point is actually,\u003cem> I'm still just not that into you. Also: did you know I had a wife who cheated on me with Lord Byron?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Next up in the dancing request line: Sir John, who spends the entire song telling Victoria she needs to snag a husband to \"keep her behavior in check\" and pop out some babies already. Get some new material, dude.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Russian Groper gives Victoria a fancy gift with their initials spelled out in diamonds, and then announces that he's going back to Russia to marry some princess his dad picked out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/huh-what.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60210\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/huh-what.gif\" alt=\"huh-what\" width=\"250\" height=\"203\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So much for #TeamRussianGroper.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Uncle Scar's pad, he's still grumpy over being a 67-year-old heir, who'll probably never be King. His wife cheers him up: \"Remember, even healthy women can die in childbirth!\" Wow. I feel really bad for \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frederica_of_Mecklenburg-Strelitz\">the real-life woman\u003c/a> this character is based on. After a cursory dive into her Wikipedia page, I declare that this depiction is unfair.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the palace, Victoria tells Mrs. Jenkins and Babyface Maid that she wishes she was a man because corsets suck. They both put up praise hands and say, \u003cem>Amen! \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mrs. Jenkins falls down for no reason and asks to be excused. Victoria is like, \u003cem>What's her damage? \u003c/em>Babyface Maid spills all the details about Mrs. Jenkins' nephew and how most non-royals think the punishment for protesting should be a bit more lenient than being sliced up and gutted. Victoria is like, \u003cem>Hmmmmm, maybe!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria finds Lord M and says she wants to sign a petition on whitehouse.gov or something to save the protestors' lives. He's like, \u003cem>Ummm, you're the Queen. You can just commute their sentences and set them up with new lives in Australia.\u003c/em> She's like, \u003cem>Cool, we'll do that, then!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On a roll, Victoria runs off to take care of another bit of business. She informs Sir John and her mom that she will grant Sir John's request for money and a title in exchange for disappearing forever and ever. Shocked, Victoria's mom turns to Sir John to find out if he's really willing to drop her for a few coins. Sir John's response:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/giphy-5.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-20781\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/giphy-5.gif\" alt=\"kanye shrug gif\" width=\"464\" height=\"264\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that day, Victoria tries to make amends with her mother: \u003cem>Hey, sorry about sending away your best friend / maybe lover and for humiliating your cancer-stricken friend and speeding up her death. Here's some fancy lace and a bigger allowance. We cool? \u003c/em>Victoria's mom decides that they are.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Victoria is painting a portrait of Elizabeth I. She tells Lord M she's decided to take a page from the former Queen's playbook and be single forever, while getting some on the side (*wink*). For the hundredth time, Lord M turns her down and tells her to maybe consider marrying her cousin Albert. This Albert better be hot, geez.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some time later, Victoria is playing a dramatic song on the piano, while everyone sits around her, pretending not to be bored. Cut to two men descending stairs. Their boots have tassels on them. Their faces have mustaches on them. They walk in and everyone stands, but Victoria is too focused on her music to notice.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Albert (rudely, in my opinion) walks up and distracts her mid-concerto. He says her name. With her eyes, she says, \u003cem>UM, WOAH, TOTALLY COOL WITH THIS MARRIAGE THING NOW.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/omy.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-60220\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/omy.gif\" alt=\"omy\" width=\"327\" height=\"259\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: Russian Groper. \u003c/strong>What a tease!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: Victoria's Mom. \u003c/strong>Losing all your friends and being left with a daughter who hates you must be tough. Here's a pity prize to go with the fancy lace.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>BRONZE: \u003cstrong>The Protestors. \u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>What do they want? Basic voting rights! When do they want it? Preferably before they all die of starvation! Keep fighting, comrades.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>SILVER: \u003c/strong>\u003cstrong> Elizabeth I. \u003c/strong>For inspiring independent women that they don't need a man (unless he's super-duper hot).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>GOLD: \u003cstrong>Mrs. Jenkins' Nephew's Guts. \u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>They get to stay inside of him! Yay!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Until next week! If you miss me, \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/author/ehapsis/\">read some of my other work \u003c/a>or \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">follow me on Twitter @xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108303/victoria-season-3-finale-recap-matchmaker-matchmaker\">'Victoria' Season 3 Finale Recap: Matchmaker, Matchmaker\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108301/victoria-season-3-episode-7-recap-california-love\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 7 Recap: California Love\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108299/victoria-season-3-episode-6-recap-love-on-the-brain\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 6 Recap: Love on the Brain\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108293/victoria-season-3-episode-5-recap-on-the-road-again\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 5 Recap: On The Road Again\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108291/victoria-season-3-episode-4-recap-ill-be-missing-you\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 4 Recap: I'll Be Missing You\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108289/victoria-season-3-episode-3-recap-la-isla-bonita\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 3 Recap: La Isla Bonita\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108287/victoria-season-3-episode-2-recap-the-guns-of-brixton\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 2 Recap: The Guns of Brixton\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108284/victoria-season-3-premiere-recap-god-save-the-queen\">'Victoria' Season 3 Premiere Recap: God Save The Queen\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97779/victoria-season-2-finale-recap-its-a-hard-knock-life\">'Victoria' Season 2 Finale Recap: It's a Hard-Knock Life\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97777/victoria-season-2-episode-6-recap-somewhere-over-the-rainbow\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 6 Recap: Somewhere Over The Rainbow\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97775/victoria-season-2-episode-5-recap-lost-and-found\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 5 Recap: Lost and Found\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97773/victoria-season-2-episode-4-recap-people-are-people\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 4 Recap: People Are People\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97771/victoria-season-2-episode-3-recap-daddy-issues\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 3 Recap: Daddy Issues\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97769/victoria-season-2-episode-2-recap-puppy-love\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 2 Recap: Puppy Love\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97767/victoria-season-2-premiere-recap-baby-its-cold-outside\">'Victoria' Season 2 Premiere Recap: Baby It's Cold Outside\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/56546/victoria-season-1-finale-recap-bye-bye-baby-blues\">'Victoria' Season 1 Finale Recap: Bye Bye Baby Blues\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/02/19/victoria-season-1-episode-6-recap-cmon-ride-the-train/\">'Victoria' Season 1, Episode 6 Recap: C'mon Ride the Train\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/02/12/pbs-victoria-season-1-episode-5-recap-ill-make-love-to-you/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 5 Recap: I’ll Make Love to You\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/02/05/pbs-victoria-season-1-episode-4-recap-wedding-bell-blues/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Wedding Bell Blues\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/29/pbs-victoria-season-1-episode-3-recap-youre-so-vain/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: You’re So Vain\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/22/victoria-season-1-episode-2-recap-all-the-single-ladies/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: All The Single Ladies\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"disqusTitle": "The Best Twitter Reactions to Donald Trump's Inauguration",
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"content": "\u003cp>So, that happened. I would say more, but those in power might yank funding for public broadcasting and slash the National Endowment of the Arts and the National Endowment For The Humanities. Wait, what's that, you say? That's \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/arts/2017/01/19/report-trump-administration-plans-to-privatize-cpb-cut-nea/\" target=\"_blank\">already planned\u003c/a>? Well, in that case...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I didn't want to watch this inauguration, the culmination of a campaign that \u003ca href=\"http://www.npr.org/2016/03/06/469420740/with-otherize-pundits-reach-outside-the-dictionary-to-describe-politics\" target=\"_blank\">otherized\u003c/a> women, people of color, the LGBT community, immigrants, Muslims, and virtually everyone else who isn't a well-off straight white male. And I didn't watch because mental health is important. But I did process this historical moment through my favorite comedic lens: Twitter.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Here are the best reactions to the inauguration:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The obvious MVP of the ceremony was Michelle LaVaughn Robinson Obama:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/PovediitzBDL/status/822482078914768896\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/chrisgeidner/status/822500044708466689\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/HornetApp/status/822478142799564800\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/jersing/status/822480514531676160\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/thenoochienoo/status/822480445778653184\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/BarabaraPaIvin/status/822468630793355267\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/morninggloria/status/822506301108473858\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Boss Ruth Bader Ginsburg knows how Michelle is feeling:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/RonanFarrow/status/822476496963010561\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One of Trump's sons nicely sums things up:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/bobbyfinger/status/822478507397804034\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Donald seems to have first-day-of-school malaise. Sad!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/HannahCranston/status/822472050161790976\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Trump has said, “No matter where we go, we have these massive crowds.\" Cool! Let's get a load of the massive inauguration crowd!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/NewsHour/status/822495293996486661\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/DanJGross/status/822489914847662080\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But I'm sure Trump and co. will be overjoyed at this silver lining:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/Scott_Gilmore/status/822485954497835009\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And by the fact that D.C. will soon be full again:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/OneNabi/status/822427954043121665\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/addarioandrea/status/822470883273035777\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Illustrating when-they-go-low-we-go-high realness, Hillary Clinton, a.k.a. the winner of the popular vote, put on a brave face and attended the inauguration of a man who led \"Lock her up!\" chants for months.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/mandystadt/status/822476910852796416\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/oureric/status/822481743668199426\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She wore white in honor of suffragettes (I'm not crying; something got in my eye):\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/jeneps/status/822464331849879553\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Kellyanne Conway wore this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/TylerDBrooke/status/822464736856014848\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Who wore it best? Kellyanne or YOladi from South African rap group Die Antwoord?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/MrPooni/status/822481506916560897\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nice hat, Kellyanne, but you'll never be Aretha:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/aterkel/status/822461859173466112\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And an honorable mention for Bush Jr.'s creative use of a rain poncho:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/juliaalonzo_/status/822518094342012928\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When the time came for a speech, Donald thought he could plagiarize a Batman villain and no one would notice. Think again:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/JahovasWitniss/status/822502060717314048\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, on the interwebs, the peaceful transfer of Twitter handles was taking place. But people quickly noticed something oddly familiar about Trump's cover photo:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/noahharlan/status/822493404596760579\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>No worries, though; Samantha Bee selflessly fixed the error:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/FullFrontalSamB/status/822503210866921472\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Donald has yet to tweet. Take that in, while you can.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/FreddieCampion/status/822492078349414400\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Twitter handles weren't the only cyber pages being edited:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/jdlovitz/status/822502641913761794\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/JayFranzone/status/822495562138316801\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/motherboard/status/822498054045650946\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/angelafritz/status/822492602113159169\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fun fact: Trump is old.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/darrenrovell/status/822449765204062209\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>God would like to be excluded from this narrative:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/jemelehill/status/822494559963934720\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A warm air kiss between Trump and Melania:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/Jezebel/status/822486352159711233\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>RBG is 83, so this quote can't be from her, but let's pretend:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/twelveoclocke/status/822437029703286784\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>How are Twitter users handling all of this?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some are plotting fancy exit strategies:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/kurtsoller/status/822497308185083905\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some are using \u003cem>Toy Story\u003c/em> analogies:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/rembert/status/822456676485890051\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some are distracting themselves with fun games:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/ambermruffin/status/822461823316279297\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some are leaving instructions:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/jaboukie/status/822496721074814977\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some are offering advice for getting through the next four years:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/dog_rates/status/822495473521061891\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And everyone else is making jokes:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/lindsaygoldwert/status/822496967863468032\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/Fred_Delicious/status/822480524270772225\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/annetdonahue/status/822481029327978498\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/bejohnce/status/822503635338657792\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/mathewrodriguez/status/822481909167095812\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/PeteBlackburn/status/822464550398296069\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/kylegriffin1/status/822479332543172612\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But not everyone is torn up over today's events:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/DrDavidDuke/status/822489438479650816\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/britney-spears/\">Britney Spears\u003c/a> stays blissfully unaware:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/brittneybtw/status/822498542581379073\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I'll leave you with this uplifting thought:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/nicole_soojung/status/822451498168815616\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And this reminder that love trumps hate:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/oureric/status/822462463409094658\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And this parting look at the 44th President:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/kylegriffin1/status/822515310695763968\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And Obama's classy parting words:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/SusanPage/status/822450760164241408\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And these heart-warming images of what we had:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/Salon/status/822505255032209409\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>So, that happened. I would say more, but those in power might yank funding for public broadcasting and slash the National Endowment of the Arts and the National Endowment For The Humanities. Wait, what's that, you say? That's \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/arts/2017/01/19/report-trump-administration-plans-to-privatize-cpb-cut-nea/\" target=\"_blank\">already planned\u003c/a>? Well, in that case...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I didn't want to watch this inauguration, the culmination of a campaign that \u003ca href=\"http://www.npr.org/2016/03/06/469420740/with-otherize-pundits-reach-outside-the-dictionary-to-describe-politics\" target=\"_blank\">otherized\u003c/a> women, people of color, the LGBT community, immigrants, Muslims, and virtually everyone else who isn't a well-off straight white male. And I didn't watch because mental health is important. But I did process this historical moment through my favorite comedic lens: Twitter.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Here are the best reactions to the inauguration:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The obvious MVP of the ceremony was Michelle LaVaughn Robinson Obama:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003caside class=\"aligncenter\">\n\u003cstrong>KQED’s Cy Musiker and David Wiegand share their picks for great events around the Bay Area this week.\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nhttps://dts.podtrac.com/redirect.mp3/www.kqed.org/.stream/anon/radio/thedolist/2017/01/TDL20170120.mp3\u003cbr>\n\u003c/aside>\n\u003cp>Whether the presidential inauguration is making you queasy or giving you a thrill, it’s always a good idea to turn off the TV and take in some shows. As extras this week, we’re suggesting the pianist \u003ca href=\"http://www.hollybowling.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Holly Bowling’s\u003c/a> reimagining of the Grateful Dead’s songs at the \u003ca href=\"http://centerfornewmusic.com/calendar/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Center for New Music on Jan. 25\u003c/a>. Or for pure musical pleasure but with a political payoff, try an inauguration night (Jan. 20) benefit concert by \u003ca href=\"http://www.f49music.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Frequency 49\u003c/a>, a San Francisco-based woodwind sextet, with all proceeds going to the American Civil Liberties Union, at the \u003ca href=\"http://www.uusf.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">First Unitarian Universalist Church of San Francisco\u003c/a>. \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Now on to the show.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3gcYSndLfc\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jan 21 and 22\u003c/strong>: \u003ca href=\"https://www.symphonysiliconvalley.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Symphony Silicon Valley\u003c/a> isn’t like most orchestras. For one, there are no charismatic conductors; instead General Director Andrew Bales picks the repertory, finds a good conductor, and then counts on his devoted musicians to make it all sound great. That formula is working well, and this weekend Bales got \u003ca href=\"http://paulpolivnick.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Paul Polivnick\u003c/a> (a regular) conducting two pieces by American composer Kevin Puts (once a composer in residence at the California Symphony), Leonard Bernstein’s \u003cem>Fancy Free \u003c/em>(gorgeous), and a violin concerto by \u003ca href=\"http://www.boosey.com/composer/Dmitry+Kabalevsky\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Dmitri Kabalavsky\u003c/a> that features virtuoso \u003ca href=\"http://www.dispeker.com/artist.php?id=mkamio\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Mayuko Kamio\u003c/a>. \u003ca href=\"https://www.symphonysiliconvalley.org/concerts.php\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Details here.\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_12645341\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-12645341\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-800x556.jpg\" alt=\"Taxicab driver at the wheel with two passengers, N.Y.C. 1956\" width=\"800\" height=\"556\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-800x556.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-160x111.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-768x534.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-1020x709.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-1920x1335.jpg 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-1180x820.jpg 1180w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-960x667.jpg 960w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-240x167.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-375x261.jpg 375w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-520x362.jpg 520w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Taxicab driver at the wheel with two passengers, N.Y.C. 1956 \u003ccite>(Photo: Diane Arbus/Courtesy of SFMOMA)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jan. 25–April 30\u003c/strong>: \u003ca href=\"http://nymag.com/thecut/2016/07/diane-arbus-c-v-r.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Diane Arbus\u003c/a> was such a brave photographer, daring to shoot pictures of people on the street who many of us might have been too shy to approach, and outsiders like a fire eater on Coney Island, or a stripper backstage in Atlantic City. And her subjects stare right back at you. The San Francisco Museum of Modern Art is presenting a show of Arbus’s early work (curated by the Metropolitan Museum of Art) called \u003cem>Diane Arbus: In the Beginning,\u003c/em> and these 100 pictures show her already mastering that penetratingly direct gaze. \u003ca href=\"https://www.sfmoma.org/exhibition/diane-arbus-beginning/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Details here\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gEAVSLzhxN0\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jan 21\u003c/strong>: The Bay Area’s \u003ca href=\"https://www.andreaclaburn.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Andrea Claburn\u003c/a> is a young, underappreciated veteran of the West Coast jazz scene. David notes that she’s a true jazz singer, getting the most out of her chosen instrument. She also does her own arrangements, and wrote five of the songs on her new album, \u003cem>Nightshade. \u003c/em>She’s a graduate of Berkeley’s \u003ca href=\"https://cjc.edu/concerts/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">California Jazz Conservatory\u003c/a>, where she now teaches. For the album, and her gig Jan. 21 at the Jazz Conservatory, she’s working with an all star band: Matt Clark on piano (her regular accompaniist), Erik Jekabson on trumpet, Terence Brewer on guitar, and Jon Santos on percussion. It’s a \u003cstrong>CHEAP THRILL!\u003c/strong>, just $15, and it should be very good. Details \u003ca href=\"https://www.andreaclaburn.com/events/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">here\u003c/a> or \u003ca href=\"https://cjc.edu/concerts/?eid=17219\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">here\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wMJvLTZOhpE\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jan 25–Feb. 19\u003c/strong>: I know everyone is gung ho about \u003ca href=\"http://www.hamiltonbroadway.com/tour.php\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cem>Hamilton\u003c/em>\u003c/a> finally coming to San Francisco, but my feeling is that the \u003ca href=\"http://funhomebroadway.com/tour.php\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cem>Fun Home\u003c/em>\u003c/a> tour is just as big a deal. This is \u003ca href=\"http://www.lisakron.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Lisa Kron \u003c/a>(\u003cem>Well\u003c/em>) and Jeanine Tesori’s (\u003cem>Caroline or Change\u003c/em>) Tony-winning musical based on the graphic memoir by \u003ca href=\"https://www.facebook.com/alison.bechdel/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Alison Bechdel\u003c/a>, about growing up lesbian in her parent’s funeral home, with a closeted gay dad and a withholding mom. It’s a beautiful and sad coming-of-age story, and the first Broadway musical featuring a lesbian character in the lead. \u003ca href=\"https://sfcurran.com/shows/fun-home/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"> Details here.\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_12644538\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-12644538\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-800x495.jpg\" alt=\"Carole Shorenstein Hayes in her favorite seat in the upper balcony at the refurbished Curran Theater\" width=\"800\" height=\"495\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-800x495.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-160x99.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-768x475.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-1020x631.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-1920x1188.jpg 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-1180x730.jpg 1180w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-960x594.jpg 960w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-240x148.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-375x232.jpg 375w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-520x322.jpg 520w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Carole Shorenstein Hayes in her favorite seat in the upper balcony at the refurbished Curran Theater \u003ccite>(Photo: Cy Musiker/KQED)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Audiences for \u003cem>Fun Home\u003c/em> also get to christen the refurbished Curran Theater. Owned by Carole Shorenstein Hays, one of the great local theater producers (\u003cem>Fences\u003c/em>), Shorensteing-Yas says she just spent two years and a “zillion dollars” (she won’t reveal the actual number) refurbishing the Curran, which is near Union Square. As she sat in her favorite seat way up in the balcony, I asked Hays why attending shows at the Curran means so much to her. “Being in the audience,” she said, “illuminates the mind and settles the soul. We’re suddenly together and understanding that we’re not alone. The audience for me is as sacred and as essential as the artists on stage, and when we’re all together, we really become our best.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zLQ1Bvm7SFo\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jan. 21\u003c/strong>: \u003ca href=\"http://fatpossum.com/artists/american-wrestlers/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">American Wrestlers\u003c/a> make music for dancing and thinking, not chokeholds. They’re a St. Louis band led by Scotsman Gary McClure and his wife Bridgette Imperial. They make terrific music with smart lyrics, and I love how tricky categories are in pop music these days. One article about the group described them as alt-rock, indie, power pop, lo-fi, and shoe-gaze. Take your pick, but see them at Bottom of the Hill. \u003ca href=\"http://www.bottomofthehill.com/calendar.html#sthash.UCt1GavV.dpbs\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Details here.\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003caside class=\"aligncenter\">\n\u003cstrong>KQED’s Cy Musiker and David Wiegand share their picks for great events around the Bay Area this week.\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nhttps://dts.podtrac.com/redirect.mp3/www.kqed.org/.stream/anon/radio/thedolist/2017/01/TDL20170120.mp3\u003cbr>\n\u003c/aside>\n\u003cp>Whether the presidential inauguration is making you queasy or giving you a thrill, it’s always a good idea to turn off the TV and take in some shows. As extras this week, we’re suggesting the pianist \u003ca href=\"http://www.hollybowling.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Holly Bowling’s\u003c/a> reimagining of the Grateful Dead’s songs at the \u003ca href=\"http://centerfornewmusic.com/calendar/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Center for New Music on Jan. 25\u003c/a>. Or for pure musical pleasure but with a political payoff, try an inauguration night (Jan. 20) benefit concert by \u003ca href=\"http://www.f49music.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Frequency 49\u003c/a>, a San Francisco-based woodwind sextet, with all proceeds going to the American Civil Liberties Union, at the \u003ca href=\"http://www.uusf.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">First Unitarian Universalist Church of San Francisco\u003c/a>. \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Now on to the show.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/p3gcYSndLfc'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/p3gcYSndLfc'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jan 21 and 22\u003c/strong>: \u003ca href=\"https://www.symphonysiliconvalley.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Symphony Silicon Valley\u003c/a> isn’t like most orchestras. For one, there are no charismatic conductors; instead General Director Andrew Bales picks the repertory, finds a good conductor, and then counts on his devoted musicians to make it all sound great. That formula is working well, and this weekend Bales got \u003ca href=\"http://paulpolivnick.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Paul Polivnick\u003c/a> (a regular) conducting two pieces by American composer Kevin Puts (once a composer in residence at the California Symphony), Leonard Bernstein’s \u003cem>Fancy Free \u003c/em>(gorgeous), and a violin concerto by \u003ca href=\"http://www.boosey.com/composer/Dmitry+Kabalevsky\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Dmitri Kabalavsky\u003c/a> that features virtuoso \u003ca href=\"http://www.dispeker.com/artist.php?id=mkamio\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Mayuko Kamio\u003c/a>. \u003ca href=\"https://www.symphonysiliconvalley.org/concerts.php\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Details here.\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_12645341\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-12645341\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-800x556.jpg\" alt=\"Taxicab driver at the wheel with two passengers, N.Y.C. 1956\" width=\"800\" height=\"556\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-800x556.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-160x111.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-768x534.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-1020x709.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-1920x1335.jpg 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-1180x820.jpg 1180w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-960x667.jpg 960w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-240x167.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-375x261.jpg 375w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C-520x362.jpg 520w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/06.-Diane-Arbus-Taxicab-driver-at-the-wheel-with-two-passengers-N.Y.C.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Taxicab driver at the wheel with two passengers, N.Y.C. 1956 \u003ccite>(Photo: Diane Arbus/Courtesy of SFMOMA)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jan. 25–April 30\u003c/strong>: \u003ca href=\"http://nymag.com/thecut/2016/07/diane-arbus-c-v-r.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Diane Arbus\u003c/a> was such a brave photographer, daring to shoot pictures of people on the street who many of us might have been too shy to approach, and outsiders like a fire eater on Coney Island, or a stripper backstage in Atlantic City. And her subjects stare right back at you. The San Francisco Museum of Modern Art is presenting a show of Arbus’s early work (curated by the Metropolitan Museum of Art) called \u003cem>Diane Arbus: In the Beginning,\u003c/em> and these 100 pictures show her already mastering that penetratingly direct gaze. \u003ca href=\"https://www.sfmoma.org/exhibition/diane-arbus-beginning/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Details here\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/gEAVSLzhxN0'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/gEAVSLzhxN0'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jan 21\u003c/strong>: The Bay Area’s \u003ca href=\"https://www.andreaclaburn.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Andrea Claburn\u003c/a> is a young, underappreciated veteran of the West Coast jazz scene. David notes that she’s a true jazz singer, getting the most out of her chosen instrument. She also does her own arrangements, and wrote five of the songs on her new album, \u003cem>Nightshade. \u003c/em>She’s a graduate of Berkeley’s \u003ca href=\"https://cjc.edu/concerts/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">California Jazz Conservatory\u003c/a>, where she now teaches. For the album, and her gig Jan. 21 at the Jazz Conservatory, she’s working with an all star band: Matt Clark on piano (her regular accompaniist), Erik Jekabson on trumpet, Terence Brewer on guitar, and Jon Santos on percussion. It’s a \u003cstrong>CHEAP THRILL!\u003c/strong>, just $15, and it should be very good. Details \u003ca href=\"https://www.andreaclaburn.com/events/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">here\u003c/a> or \u003ca href=\"https://cjc.edu/concerts/?eid=17219\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">here\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/wMJvLTZOhpE'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/wMJvLTZOhpE'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jan 25–Feb. 19\u003c/strong>: I know everyone is gung ho about \u003ca href=\"http://www.hamiltonbroadway.com/tour.php\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cem>Hamilton\u003c/em>\u003c/a> finally coming to San Francisco, but my feeling is that the \u003ca href=\"http://funhomebroadway.com/tour.php\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u003cem>Fun Home\u003c/em>\u003c/a> tour is just as big a deal. This is \u003ca href=\"http://www.lisakron.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Lisa Kron \u003c/a>(\u003cem>Well\u003c/em>) and Jeanine Tesori’s (\u003cem>Caroline or Change\u003c/em>) Tony-winning musical based on the graphic memoir by \u003ca href=\"https://www.facebook.com/alison.bechdel/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Alison Bechdel\u003c/a>, about growing up lesbian in her parent’s funeral home, with a closeted gay dad and a withholding mom. It’s a beautiful and sad coming-of-age story, and the first Broadway musical featuring a lesbian character in the lead. \u003ca href=\"https://sfcurran.com/shows/fun-home/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"> Details here.\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_12644538\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-12644538\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-800x495.jpg\" alt=\"Carole Shorenstein Hayes in her favorite seat in the upper balcony at the refurbished Curran Theater\" width=\"800\" height=\"495\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-800x495.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-160x99.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-768x475.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-1020x631.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-1920x1188.jpg 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-1180x730.jpg 1180w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-960x594.jpg 960w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-240x148.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-375x232.jpg 375w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11-520x322.jpg 520w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/FullSizeRender-11.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Carole Shorenstein Hayes in her favorite seat in the upper balcony at the refurbished Curran Theater \u003ccite>(Photo: Cy Musiker/KQED)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Audiences for \u003cem>Fun Home\u003c/em> also get to christen the refurbished Curran Theater. Owned by Carole Shorenstein Hays, one of the great local theater producers (\u003cem>Fences\u003c/em>), Shorensteing-Yas says she just spent two years and a “zillion dollars” (she won’t reveal the actual number) refurbishing the Curran, which is near Union Square. As she sat in her favorite seat way up in the balcony, I asked Hays why attending shows at the Curran means so much to her. “Being in the audience,” she said, “illuminates the mind and settles the soul. We’re suddenly together and understanding that we’re not alone. The audience for me is as sacred and as essential as the artists on stage, and when we’re all together, we really become our best.”\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/zLQ1Bvm7SFo'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/zLQ1Bvm7SFo'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jan. 21\u003c/strong>: \u003ca href=\"http://fatpossum.com/artists/american-wrestlers/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">American Wrestlers\u003c/a> make music for dancing and thinking, not chokeholds. They’re a St. Louis band led by Scotsman Gary McClure and his wife Bridgette Imperial. They make terrific music with smart lyrics, and I love how tricky categories are in pop music these days. One article about the group described them as alt-rock, indie, power pop, lo-fi, and shoe-gaze. Take your pick, but see them at Bottom of the Hill. \u003ca href=\"http://www.bottomofthehill.com/calendar.html#sthash.UCt1GavV.dpbs\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Details here.\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "Get Your First Look at Susan Sarandon and Jessica Lange as Bette Davis and Joan Crawford in 'Feud'",
"title": "Get Your First Look at Susan Sarandon and Jessica Lange as Bette Davis and Joan Crawford in 'Feud'",
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"content": "\u003cp>\u003c!-- iframe plugin v.4.3 wordpress.org/plugins/iframe/ -->\u003cbr>\n\u003ciframe width=\"100%\" height=\"166\" scrolling=\"no\" frameborder=\"no\" src=\"https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/264856470&color=ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false\" class=\"iframe-class\">\u003c/iframe>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Bette Davis vs. Joan Crawford, a.k.a. the Old-Hollywood feud that makes Mariah Carey vs. Jennifer Lopez look like child's play, is coming to a TV (or -- let's be real -- a laptop screen) near you on March 5, 2017. Last summer, \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/08/24/bette-davis-v-joan-crawford-the-hateful-history-behind-old-hollywoods-nastiest-feud/\">Ryan Murphy announced\u003c/a> that Susan Sarandon and Jessica Lange would play Bette Davis and Joan Crawford. Now we know what that looks like, with the release of the first official photos.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Behold!\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_59614\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 597px\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.20.25-AM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"wp-image-59614 size-full\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.20.25-AM.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2017-01-19 at 11.20.25 AM\" width=\"597\" height=\"598\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.20.25-AM.png 597w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.20.25-AM-160x160.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.20.25-AM-240x240.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.20.25-AM-375x376.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.20.25-AM-520x521.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.20.25-AM-32x32.png 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.20.25-AM-50x50.png 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.20.25-AM-64x64.png 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.20.25-AM-96x96.png 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.20.25-AM-128x128.png 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.20.25-AM-150x150.png 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 597px) 100vw, 597px\">\u003c/a>\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Photo: Entertainment Weekly\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_59613\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 601px\">\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.33.10-AM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"wp-image-59613 size-full\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.33.10-AM.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2017-01-19 at 11.33.10 AM\" width=\"601\" height=\"308\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.33.10-AM.png 601w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.33.10-AM-160x82.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.33.10-AM-240x123.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.33.10-AM-375x192.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-19-at-11.33.10-AM-520x266.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 601px) 100vw, 601px\">\u003c/a>\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Photo: Entertainment Weekly\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Considering recent casting atrocities, such as \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/12/01/heres-your-first-look-at-lifetimes-britney-spears-movie-if-your-eyes-can-stand-it/\">Lifetime's Britney Spears biopic\u003c/a> or the \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2015/06/04/first-photo-of-lifetimes-full-house-tv-movie-will-damage-your-vision/\">\u003cem>Full House\u003c/em> TV movie\u003c/a>, this is pretty good!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If these photos don't excite you, these teaser trailers will:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1qDm9D422tQ\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kHpulQE9E1g\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I know I'll be watching!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you aren't well-versed in the acrimonious relationship between Bette and Joan, read up:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote class=\"embedly-card\">\n\u003ch4>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/08/24/bette-davis-v-joan-crawford-the-hateful-history-behind-old-hollywoods-nastiest-feud/\">Bette Davis v. Joan Crawford: The Hateful History Behind Old Hollywood’s Nastiest Feud\u003c/a>\u003c/h4>\n\u003cp>The Old Hollywood rivalry that makes Mariah vs. Jennifer Lopez look like child's play.\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[embedly_js]\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/1qDm9D422tQ'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/1qDm9D422tQ'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kHpulQE9E1g\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I know I'll be watching!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you aren't well-versed in the acrimonious relationship between Bette and Joan, read up:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote class=\"embedly-card\">\n\u003ch4>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/08/24/bette-davis-v-joan-crawford-the-hateful-history-behind-old-hollywoods-nastiest-feud/\">Bette Davis v. Joan Crawford: The Hateful History Behind Old Hollywood’s Nastiest Feud\u003c/a>\u003c/h4>\n\u003cp>The Old Hollywood rivalry that makes Mariah vs. Jennifer Lopez look like child's play.\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[embedly_js]\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "How 'The Little Mermaid' Predicted Britney Spears' Entire Life",
"title": "How 'The Little Mermaid' Predicted Britney Spears' Entire Life",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>\u003cem>This piece was inspired by an episode of \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">The Cooler\u003c/a>, KQED’s weekly pop culture podcast. Give it a listen!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c!-- iframe plugin v.4.3 wordpress.org/plugins/iframe/ -->\u003cbr>\n\u003ciframe width=\"100%\" height=\"166\" scrolling=\"no\" frameborder=\"no\" src=\"https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/303456535&color=ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false\" class=\"iframe-class\">\u003c/iframe>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We all have our daily rituals. There's the universal: brushing teeth, going to work, eating avocado. And then there's the idiosyncratic. For me, a day does not pass without texting at least one friend about the latest charmingly odd thing that has popped up on \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/03/09/the-redemptive-power-of-britney-spears-instagram/\">Britney Spears' Instagram\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Yesterday's text conversation was in honor of the following:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.instagram.com/p/BLZOzQCgN5R/?taken-by=britneyspears\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To the unimaginative masses, who have lost all innocence and ability to recognize magic in the world, it's just a photo of a chess board. To Britney, it is a curiosity waiting to be explored, an invitation to transform.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Most of Britney’s Instagram posts are dedicated to random curiosities, such as \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BLIEoclASu3/?taken-by=britneyspears\">miniature puppies sitting in heels in front of the Eiffel Tower\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BKhZipwgHJi/?taken-by=britneyspears\">creepy children\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BKZ3LewgwMC/?taken-by=britneyspears\">rainbow unicorn kittens\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BGrwELtm8Eq/?taken-by=britneyspears\">body positive memes\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BGewwN9m8Iq/?taken-by=britneyspears\">mood illustrations featuring Sailor Moon\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BGfdAKfm8KZ/?taken-by=britneyspears\">lazy kittens relaxing in hammocks\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BGKEYozm8AB/?taken-by=britneyspears\">reminders that's she Christian\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BGCfmn-G8AC/?taken-by=britneyspears\">random, unattributed, but valid words of wisdom\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BFSwMQ3m8H4/?taken-by=britneyspears\">cats wearing backpacks\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BEkCgS7G8NA/?taken-by=britneyspears\">feminist North West jokes\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BEUkDY3m8Hy/?taken-by=britneyspears\">\u003cem>Sex and the City\u003c/em> screenshots\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BDojA4lm8FW/?taken-by=britneyspears\">throwbacks to when she and a gang-signing Leonardo Dicaprio hung out\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BBlpJoRm8B2/?taken-by=britneyspears\">Albert Einstein fangirling\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BBRanuEm8B9/?taken-by=britneyspears\">weirdly sexual lion art\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BAvLa51m8HB/?taken-by=britneyspears\">lust for bearded models\u003c/a>,\u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/_IrfByG8En/?taken-by=britneyspears\"> troubling watermarked art\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/-VtgC8m8PG/?taken-by=britneyspears\">gratitude for hot bread\u003c/a>, and \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/-VtgC8m8PG/?taken-by=britneyspears\">nods to all-denim relationships of yore\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Britney's Instagram feels like a cyber manifestation of Ariel’s cave of wonders and knick-knacks, so as a joke, I texted a friend: \"Britney is Ariel before she left home.” But the more I think about it, the similarities between Britney\u003c/span> and \u003cem>The Little Mermaid\u003c/em>’s protagonist are actually pretty uncanny.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let us count the ways:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Both Ariel and Britney are known for their voices. In the first few minutes of \u003cem>The Little Mermaid\u003c/em>, an audience is wildly disappointed by Ariel's failure to show up to a gig.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-41199\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-800x450.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2016-10-10 at 5.28.04 PM\" width=\"800\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-800x450.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-400x225.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-768x432.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-1440x811.png 1440w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-1180x664.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-960x541.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM.png 1680w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Similarly, many leave Britney shows disappointed, due to her insistence on lip-syncing, another form of not showing up (don't @ me, Britney stans; I love her dearly, but facts are facts).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Almost everything Ariel does in \u003cem>The Little Mermaid\u003c/em> is in direct opposition to the limits her father places on her freedom of movement and expression. Similarly, the major theme in Britney's life has been fighting against an overprotective father and management team, a struggle that continues to this day and inspired this bop:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PZYSiWHW8V0\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Both Ariel and Britney have a habit of fawning over and seeing possibility in ordinary objects that bore everyone else.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-41201\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-800x452.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2016-10-10 at 5.12.59 PM\" width=\"800\" height=\"452\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-800x452.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-400x226.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-768x434.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-1440x814.png 1440w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-1180x667.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-960x543.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM.png 1670w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-41198\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-800x448.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2016-10-10 at 5.31.45 PM\" width=\"800\" height=\"448\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-800x448.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-400x224.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-768x430.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-1440x807.png 1440w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-1180x661.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-960x538.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM.png 1680w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Both Ariel and Britney are followed around by a protective, risk-averse family friend whose sole purpose is to remind them that all of their impulses will most likely lead to devastation. For Ariel, it’s Flounder. For Britney, it’s Felicia, whom y\u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">ou might remember as \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/83/da/0a/83da0a444c3fd2e95e70859781a3d11f.jpg\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">the teacher in the \"...Baby One More Time\" music video\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/felicia-flounder-britney-ariel.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-41214\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/felicia-flounder-britney-ariel-800x400.jpg\" alt=\"felicia-flounder-britney-ariel\" width=\"800\" height=\"400\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/felicia-flounder-britney-ariel.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/felicia-flounder-britney-ariel-400x200.jpg 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/felicia-flounder-britney-ariel-768x384.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Flounder and Felicia are both known to accidentally rat their girls out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-41197\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM-800x424.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2016-10-10 at 5.39.48 PM\" width=\"800\" height=\"424\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM-800x424.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM-400x212.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM-768x407.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM-1180x625.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM-960x509.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM.png 1195w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/eca23674b2c6d44da612b49bb9ded03d.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58282\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/eca23674b2c6d44da612b49bb9ded03d.jpg\" alt=\"eca23674b2c6d44da612b49bb9ded03d\" width=\"236\" height=\"305\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/eca23674b2c6d44da612b49bb9ded03d.jpg 236w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/eca23674b2c6d44da612b49bb9ded03d-160x207.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 236px) 100vw, 236px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Both Ariel and Britney are also followed around by a micromanager hired by their fathers to convince them that a controlled environment free of choice is better than the unknown of a life of their own choosing. For Ariel, it's Sebastian. For Britney, it's her current manager Larry Rudolph.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Ariel-Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-59440 size-full\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Ariel-Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353.jpg\" alt=\"Ariel---Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353\" width=\"483\" height=\"353\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Ariel-Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353.jpg 483w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Ariel-Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353-160x117.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Ariel-Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353-240x175.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Ariel-Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353-375x274.jpg 375w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 483px) 100vw, 483px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-59439 size-full\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit_vma2.jpg\" alt=\"brit_vma2\" width=\"454\" height=\"350\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit_vma2.jpg 454w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit_vma2-160x123.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit_vma2-240x185.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit_vma2-375x289.jpg 375w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 454px) 100vw, 454px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When Ariel fails to show up to the show at the beginning of the movie, Sebastian says, \"This concert was to be the pinnacle of my distinguished career. Now thanks to you I am the laughingstock of the entire kingdom!\" Swap out \"entire kingdom\" for \"entire music industry\" and it's easily something that could come out of Larry Rudolph's mouth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Every time Ariel and Britney sneak away from the pressures of being the princess of the sea and the princess of pop, they are hounded by sharks and the paparazzi, respectively.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/whoa-the-little-mermaid-32149733-500-303.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-41216\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/whoa-the-little-mermaid-32149733-500-303.gif\" alt=\"whoa-the-little-mermaid-32149733-500-303\" width=\"500\" height=\"303\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/britney.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-41215\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/britney.gif\" alt=\"britney\" width=\"280\" height=\"210\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The first time Ariel sees Prince Eric, he's dancing and she's\u003cem> feeling\u003c/em> his moves.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/EricReaction2.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-41218\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/EricReaction2.gif\" alt=\"EricReaction2\" width=\"422\" height=\"235\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The first time Britney laid eyes on future husband and baby daddy Kevin Federline, she was equally feeling it. Federline was a backup dancer for Michael Jackson, Destiny's Child, Pink, and none other than Justin Timberlake, Britney's ex. (Kevin is the one with the cornrows and sleeveless jacket.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/anigif_enhanced-23574-1398543782-3.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-41217\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/anigif_enhanced-23574-1398543782-3.gif\" alt=\"kevin federline justin timberlake britney\" width=\"530\" height=\"356\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Triton didn't like Ariel's taste in men. And Britney's dad didn't like hers either. This convo between Ariel and Triton is something that probably happened in the Spears household:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Ariel\u003c/b>: Daddy, I love him!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Triton\u003c/b>: Have you lost your senses completely? He's a human (backup dancer), you're a mermaid (pop superstar)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Ariel\u003c/b>: I don't care!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Both Ariel and Britney rebelled against their fathers' strict rules by hanging out with the wrong crowd. For Ariel, it was Ursula's henchmen, Flotsam and Jetsam. For Britney, it was Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-41329\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam-800x424.png\" alt=\"ariel-flotsam-jetsam\" width=\"800\" height=\"424\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam-800x424.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam-400x212.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam-768x407.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam-1180x625.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam-960x508.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam.png 1197w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/hqdefault.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-41327\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/hqdefault.jpg\" alt=\"hqdefault\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/hqdefault.jpg 480w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/hqdefault-400x300.jpg 400w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 480px) 100vw, 480px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Desperate to take control of their lives, both Ariel and Britney turned to a Svengali figure, who took advantage of them in their time of need. For Ariel, it was Ursula. For Britney, it was Sam Lutfi, a super shady dude who popped out of nowhere to enable her and try to make a buck off the situation by becoming her manager. He did something similar with Amanda Bynes and, as recently as last summer,\u003ca href=\"http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-3663105/Britney-Spears-controversial-ex-manager-Sam-Lutfi-kidnapped-robbed-estranged-musician-husband-Frances-Bean-Cobain.html\"> allegedly kidnapped and robbed Frances Bean Cobain's husband\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-41337\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350-800x450.jpg\" alt=\"efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350\" width=\"800\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350-400x225.jpg 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350.jpg 864w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/LuftiBritney.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-41338\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/LuftiBritney.jpg\" alt=\"LuftiBritney\" width=\"620\" height=\"372\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/LuftiBritney.jpg 620w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/LuftiBritney-400x240.jpg 400w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 620px) 100vw, 620px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As a consequence of Ursula's meddling, Ariel literally lost her voice. Britney lost hers in a more figurative sense. As a response to Britney running around with Sam and getting into trouble, Britney's dad and Larry Rudolph probably had a conversation similar to this one between Triton and Sebastian:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sebastian:\u003c/strong> Why, if Ariel was my daughter, I'd show her who was boss. None of this flitting to the surface (da club) and other such nonsense. No, sir. I'd keep her under tight control.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Triton\u003c/b>: You're absolutely right, Sebastian. Ariel needs constant supervision.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sebastian: \u003c/strong>Constant.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Triton\u003c/b>: Someone to watch over her, to keep her out of trouble.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sebastian: \u003c/strong>All the time.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Triton\u003c/b>: And YOU are just the crab (manager) to do it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This is where Britney's conservatorship comes in, a legally binding document, much like the one Ariel signed with Ursula, which robbed Britney of her voice in the sense that she could no longer make her own decisions in terms of her life, her business, what songs she recorded, and basically everything else.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sebastian sings a whole song called \"Under the Sea,\" trying to convince Ariel that she should just stay home and not do anything her father wouldn't approve of. Change the title to \"Under the Conservatorship\" (or \"Under the C,\" for short) and you basically have the same thing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Conservatorship Day 1:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58268\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/ariel_sees_triton_and_is_scared_by_arielfan90-d9kic5s.gif\" alt=\"ariel_sees_triton_and_is_scared_by_arielfan90-d9kic5s\" width=\"690\" height=\"388\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ariel's big hit is \"Part of Your World,\" in which she laments that, despite a life of privilege and spoils, there's still a deep loneliness inside her:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>Look at this stuff\u003cbr>\nIsn't it neat?\u003cbr>\nWouldn't you think my collection's complete?\u003cbr>\nWouldn't you think I'm the girl\u003cbr>\nThe girl who has everything?\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>This idea of having it all but still being unhappy is also present throughout Britney Jean Spears' life, and infused in one of her most iconic songs, \"Lucky\":\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>She's so lucky, she's a star\u003cbr>\nBut she cry, cry, cries in her lonely heart, thinking\u003cbr>\nIf there's nothing missing in my life\u003cbr>\nThen why do these tears come at night?\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>Here's another overlap. Ariel sings:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>I've got gadgets and gizmos aplenty\u003cbr>\nI've got whozits and whatzits galore\u003cbr>\n[You want thingamabobs? I got twenty]\u003cbr>\nBut who cares?\u003cbr>\nNo big deal\u003cbr>\nI want more\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>You know who else wants more? Britney!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=elueA2rofoo\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"Part of Your World\" could also be about Britney's desire to just be a regular person who can go to a Starbucks:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>I wanna be where the people are\u003cbr>\nI wanna see\u003cbr>\nWanna see 'em [sippin' grande lattes]\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>Or a beach:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>What would I give\u003cbr>\nIf I could live\u003cbr>\nOutta these waters?\u003cbr>\nWhat would I pay\u003cbr>\nTo spend a day\u003cbr>\nWarm on the sand?\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>Or anywhere else, without being hounded by paparazzi:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>Up where they walk\u003cbr>\nUp where they run\u003cbr>\nUp where they stay all day in the sun\u003cbr>\nWanderin' free\u003cbr>\nWish I could be\u003cbr>\nPart of that world\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>One of my favorite parts of \"Part of Your World\" is when Ariel gets super feminist:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>Betcha on land\u003cbr>\nThey understand\u003cbr>\nBet they don't reprimand their daughters\u003cbr>\nBright young women\u003cbr>\nSick o' swimmin'\u003cbr>\nReady to stand\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>Britney also has a song all about being ready to stand up and claim her agency:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dIOH8Trfas4\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Eventually, after hitting rock bottom...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/ariel_so_far_down_in_the_whirlpool_by_arielfan90-d99q31d.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58263\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/ariel_so_far_down_in_the_whirlpool_by_arielfan90-d99q31d.gif\" alt=\"ariel_so_far_down_in_the_whirlpool_by_arielfan90-d99q31d\" width=\"690\" height=\"388\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...both women find their way to a more-or-less happy ending.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/403075933.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58264\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/403075933.gif\" alt=\"britney happy gif\" width=\"450\" height=\"331\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Triton and Britney's dad both realize that it might be a good idea to let their adult daughters be in charge of their own lives.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Sebastian\u003c/b>: Well, it's like I always say, Your Majesty. Children got to be free to lead their own lives.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Triton\u003c/b>: You... always say that? \u003ci>[sighs]\u003c/i> Then I guess there's just one problem left.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Sebastian\u003c/b>: And what's that, Your Majesty?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Triton\u003c/b>: How much I'm going to miss her.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Triton grants Ariel legs so she can live above sea level and marry Eric. And, last year, Britney was freed to get back to making her own decisions in terms of her music career. She was able to call all the shots and have complete control over her last album, \u003cem>Glory\u003c/em>, and it's her best album since the conservatorship was put in place.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>These are just some of the reasons why I believe \u003cem>The Little Mermaid\u003c/em> predicted Britney's entire life. Not completely convinced yet? Here are a few last parallels:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dogs love them:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58270\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994.jpg\" alt=\"img_0994\" width=\"522\" height=\"313\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994.jpg 522w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994-160x96.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994-240x144.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994-375x225.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994-520x312.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 522px) 100vw, 522px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58269\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538.jpg\" alt=\"celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538\" width=\"675\" height=\"538\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538.jpg 675w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538-160x128.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538-240x191.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538-375x299.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538-520x414.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 675px) 100vw, 675px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Both have been known to deeply feel themselves in a bad look:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-41194\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-800x447.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2016-10-10 at 9.36.56 PM\" width=\"800\" height=\"447\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-800x447.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-400x224.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-768x430.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-1440x805.png 1440w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-1180x660.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-960x537.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM.png 1679w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/3d68d30837aed0ec6f9da730e30f7953.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58267\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/3d68d30837aed0ec6f9da730e30f7953.jpg\" alt=\"3d68d30837aed0ec6f9da730e30f7953\" width=\"236\" height=\"359\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/3d68d30837aed0ec6f9da730e30f7953.jpg 236w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/3d68d30837aed0ec6f9da730e30f7953-160x243.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 236px) 100vw, 236px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And both have replicas that look nothing like them.\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-41195\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM-800x423.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2016-10-10 at 6.37.27 PM\" width=\"800\" height=\"423\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM-800x423.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM-400x212.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM-768x406.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM-1180x624.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM-960x508.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM.png 1199w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58266\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo.jpg\" alt=\"photo\" width=\"768\" height=\"1024\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo-160x213.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo-240x320.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo-375x500.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo-520x693.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 768px) 100vw, 768px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I rest my case.\u003c/p>\n\n",
"disqusIdentifier": "41144 http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/?p=41144",
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"excerpt": "A deep-dive into the uncanny parallels between the princess of the sea and the princess of pop.",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cem>This piece was inspired by an episode of \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">The Cooler\u003c/a>, KQED’s weekly pop culture podcast. Give it a listen!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c!-- iframe plugin v.4.3 wordpress.org/plugins/iframe/ -->\u003cbr>\n\u003ciframe width=\"100%\" height=\"166\" scrolling=\"no\" frameborder=\"no\" src=\"https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/303456535&color=ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false\" class=\"iframe-class\">\u003c/iframe>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We all have our daily rituals. There's the universal: brushing teeth, going to work, eating avocado. And then there's the idiosyncratic. For me, a day does not pass without texting at least one friend about the latest charmingly odd thing that has popped up on \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/03/09/the-redemptive-power-of-britney-spears-instagram/\">Britney Spears' Instagram\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Yesterday's text conversation was in honor of the following:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To the unimaginative masses, who have lost all innocence and ability to recognize magic in the world, it's just a photo of a chess board. To Britney, it is a curiosity waiting to be explored, an invitation to transform.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Most of Britney’s Instagram posts are dedicated to random curiosities, such as \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BLIEoclASu3/?taken-by=britneyspears\">miniature puppies sitting in heels in front of the Eiffel Tower\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BKhZipwgHJi/?taken-by=britneyspears\">creepy children\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BKZ3LewgwMC/?taken-by=britneyspears\">rainbow unicorn kittens\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BGrwELtm8Eq/?taken-by=britneyspears\">body positive memes\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BGewwN9m8Iq/?taken-by=britneyspears\">mood illustrations featuring Sailor Moon\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BGfdAKfm8KZ/?taken-by=britneyspears\">lazy kittens relaxing in hammocks\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BGKEYozm8AB/?taken-by=britneyspears\">reminders that's she Christian\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BGCfmn-G8AC/?taken-by=britneyspears\">random, unattributed, but valid words of wisdom\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BFSwMQ3m8H4/?taken-by=britneyspears\">cats wearing backpacks\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BEkCgS7G8NA/?taken-by=britneyspears\">feminist North West jokes\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BEUkDY3m8Hy/?taken-by=britneyspears\">\u003cem>Sex and the City\u003c/em> screenshots\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BDojA4lm8FW/?taken-by=britneyspears\">throwbacks to when she and a gang-signing Leonardo Dicaprio hung out\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BBlpJoRm8B2/?taken-by=britneyspears\">Albert Einstein fangirling\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BBRanuEm8B9/?taken-by=britneyspears\">weirdly sexual lion art\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/BAvLa51m8HB/?taken-by=britneyspears\">lust for bearded models\u003c/a>,\u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/_IrfByG8En/?taken-by=britneyspears\"> troubling watermarked art\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/-VtgC8m8PG/?taken-by=britneyspears\">gratitude for hot bread\u003c/a>, and \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/p/-VtgC8m8PG/?taken-by=britneyspears\">nods to all-denim relationships of yore\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> Britney's Instagram feels like a cyber manifestation of Ariel’s cave of wonders and knick-knacks, so as a joke, I texted a friend: \"Britney is Ariel before she left home.” But the more I think about it, the similarities between Britney\u003c/span> and \u003cem>The Little Mermaid\u003c/em>’s protagonist are actually pretty uncanny.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let us count the ways:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Both Ariel and Britney are known for their voices. In the first few minutes of \u003cem>The Little Mermaid\u003c/em>, an audience is wildly disappointed by Ariel's failure to show up to a gig.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-41199\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-800x450.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2016-10-10 at 5.28.04 PM\" width=\"800\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-800x450.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-400x225.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-768x432.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-1440x811.png 1440w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-1180x664.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM-960x541.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.28.04-PM.png 1680w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Similarly, many leave Britney shows disappointed, due to her insistence on lip-syncing, another form of not showing up (don't @ me, Britney stans; I love her dearly, but facts are facts).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Almost everything Ariel does in \u003cem>The Little Mermaid\u003c/em> is in direct opposition to the limits her father places on her freedom of movement and expression. Similarly, the major theme in Britney's life has been fighting against an overprotective father and management team, a struggle that continues to this day and inspired this bop:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/PZYSiWHW8V0'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/PZYSiWHW8V0'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Both Ariel and Britney have a habit of fawning over and seeing possibility in ordinary objects that bore everyone else.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-41201\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-800x452.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2016-10-10 at 5.12.59 PM\" width=\"800\" height=\"452\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-800x452.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-400x226.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-768x434.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-1440x814.png 1440w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-1180x667.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM-960x543.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.12.59-PM.png 1670w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-41198\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-800x448.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2016-10-10 at 5.31.45 PM\" width=\"800\" height=\"448\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-800x448.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-400x224.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-768x430.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-1440x807.png 1440w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-1180x661.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM-960x538.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.31.45-PM.png 1680w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Both Ariel and Britney are followed around by a protective, risk-averse family friend whose sole purpose is to remind them that all of their impulses will most likely lead to devastation. For Ariel, it’s Flounder. For Britney, it’s Felicia, whom y\u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">ou might remember as \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/83/da/0a/83da0a444c3fd2e95e70859781a3d11f.jpg\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">the teacher in the \"...Baby One More Time\" music video\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/felicia-flounder-britney-ariel.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-41214\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/felicia-flounder-britney-ariel-800x400.jpg\" alt=\"felicia-flounder-britney-ariel\" width=\"800\" height=\"400\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/felicia-flounder-britney-ariel.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/felicia-flounder-britney-ariel-400x200.jpg 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/felicia-flounder-britney-ariel-768x384.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Flounder and Felicia are both known to accidentally rat their girls out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-41197\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM-800x424.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2016-10-10 at 5.39.48 PM\" width=\"800\" height=\"424\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM-800x424.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM-400x212.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM-768x407.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM-1180x625.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM-960x509.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-5.39.48-PM.png 1195w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/eca23674b2c6d44da612b49bb9ded03d.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58282\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/eca23674b2c6d44da612b49bb9ded03d.jpg\" alt=\"eca23674b2c6d44da612b49bb9ded03d\" width=\"236\" height=\"305\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/eca23674b2c6d44da612b49bb9ded03d.jpg 236w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/eca23674b2c6d44da612b49bb9ded03d-160x207.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 236px) 100vw, 236px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Both Ariel and Britney are also followed around by a micromanager hired by their fathers to convince them that a controlled environment free of choice is better than the unknown of a life of their own choosing. For Ariel, it's Sebastian. For Britney, it's her current manager Larry Rudolph.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Ariel-Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-59440 size-full\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Ariel-Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353.jpg\" alt=\"Ariel---Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353\" width=\"483\" height=\"353\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Ariel-Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353.jpg 483w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Ariel-Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353-160x117.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Ariel-Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353-240x175.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Ariel-Sebastian-the-little-mermaid-45008_483_353-375x274.jpg 375w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 483px) 100vw, 483px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-59439 size-full\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit_vma2.jpg\" alt=\"brit_vma2\" width=\"454\" height=\"350\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit_vma2.jpg 454w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit_vma2-160x123.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit_vma2-240x185.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/brit_vma2-375x289.jpg 375w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 454px) 100vw, 454px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When Ariel fails to show up to the show at the beginning of the movie, Sebastian says, \"This concert was to be the pinnacle of my distinguished career. Now thanks to you I am the laughingstock of the entire kingdom!\" Swap out \"entire kingdom\" for \"entire music industry\" and it's easily something that could come out of Larry Rudolph's mouth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Every time Ariel and Britney sneak away from the pressures of being the princess of the sea and the princess of pop, they are hounded by sharks and the paparazzi, respectively.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/whoa-the-little-mermaid-32149733-500-303.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-41216\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/whoa-the-little-mermaid-32149733-500-303.gif\" alt=\"whoa-the-little-mermaid-32149733-500-303\" width=\"500\" height=\"303\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/britney.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-41215\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/britney.gif\" alt=\"britney\" width=\"280\" height=\"210\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The first time Ariel sees Prince Eric, he's dancing and she's\u003cem> feeling\u003c/em> his moves.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/EricReaction2.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-41218\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/EricReaction2.gif\" alt=\"EricReaction2\" width=\"422\" height=\"235\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The first time Britney laid eyes on future husband and baby daddy Kevin Federline, she was equally feeling it. Federline was a backup dancer for Michael Jackson, Destiny's Child, Pink, and none other than Justin Timberlake, Britney's ex. (Kevin is the one with the cornrows and sleeveless jacket.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/anigif_enhanced-23574-1398543782-3.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-41217\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/anigif_enhanced-23574-1398543782-3.gif\" alt=\"kevin federline justin timberlake britney\" width=\"530\" height=\"356\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Triton didn't like Ariel's taste in men. And Britney's dad didn't like hers either. This convo between Ariel and Triton is something that probably happened in the Spears household:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Ariel\u003c/b>: Daddy, I love him!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Triton\u003c/b>: Have you lost your senses completely? He's a human (backup dancer), you're a mermaid (pop superstar)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Ariel\u003c/b>: I don't care!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Both Ariel and Britney rebelled against their fathers' strict rules by hanging out with the wrong crowd. For Ariel, it was Ursula's henchmen, Flotsam and Jetsam. For Britney, it was Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-41329\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam-800x424.png\" alt=\"ariel-flotsam-jetsam\" width=\"800\" height=\"424\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam-800x424.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam-400x212.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam-768x407.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam-1180x625.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam-960x508.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/ariel-flotsam-jetsam.png 1197w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/hqdefault.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-41327\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/hqdefault.jpg\" alt=\"hqdefault\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/hqdefault.jpg 480w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/hqdefault-400x300.jpg 400w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 480px) 100vw, 480px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Desperate to take control of their lives, both Ariel and Britney turned to a Svengali figure, who took advantage of them in their time of need. For Ariel, it was Ursula. For Britney, it was Sam Lutfi, a super shady dude who popped out of nowhere to enable her and try to make a buck off the situation by becoming her manager. He did something similar with Amanda Bynes and, as recently as last summer,\u003ca href=\"http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-3663105/Britney-Spears-controversial-ex-manager-Sam-Lutfi-kidnapped-robbed-estranged-musician-husband-Frances-Bean-Cobain.html\"> allegedly kidnapped and robbed Frances Bean Cobain's husband\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-41337\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350-800x450.jpg\" alt=\"efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350\" width=\"800\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350-400x225.jpg 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/efaa1290-cbe2-0132-9a8a-0e01949ad350.jpg 864w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/LuftiBritney.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-41338\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/LuftiBritney.jpg\" alt=\"LuftiBritney\" width=\"620\" height=\"372\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/LuftiBritney.jpg 620w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/LuftiBritney-400x240.jpg 400w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 620px) 100vw, 620px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As a consequence of Ursula's meddling, Ariel literally lost her voice. Britney lost hers in a more figurative sense. As a response to Britney running around with Sam and getting into trouble, Britney's dad and Larry Rudolph probably had a conversation similar to this one between Triton and Sebastian:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sebastian:\u003c/strong> Why, if Ariel was my daughter, I'd show her who was boss. None of this flitting to the surface (da club) and other such nonsense. No, sir. I'd keep her under tight control.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Triton\u003c/b>: You're absolutely right, Sebastian. Ariel needs constant supervision.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sebastian: \u003c/strong>Constant.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Triton\u003c/b>: Someone to watch over her, to keep her out of trouble.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Sebastian: \u003c/strong>All the time.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Triton\u003c/b>: And YOU are just the crab (manager) to do it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This is where Britney's conservatorship comes in, a legally binding document, much like the one Ariel signed with Ursula, which robbed Britney of her voice in the sense that she could no longer make her own decisions in terms of her life, her business, what songs she recorded, and basically everything else.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sebastian sings a whole song called \"Under the Sea,\" trying to convince Ariel that she should just stay home and not do anything her father wouldn't approve of. Change the title to \"Under the Conservatorship\" (or \"Under the C,\" for short) and you basically have the same thing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Conservatorship Day 1:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58268\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/ariel_sees_triton_and_is_scared_by_arielfan90-d9kic5s.gif\" alt=\"ariel_sees_triton_and_is_scared_by_arielfan90-d9kic5s\" width=\"690\" height=\"388\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ariel's big hit is \"Part of Your World,\" in which she laments that, despite a life of privilege and spoils, there's still a deep loneliness inside her:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>Look at this stuff\u003cbr>\nIsn't it neat?\u003cbr>\nWouldn't you think my collection's complete?\u003cbr>\nWouldn't you think I'm the girl\u003cbr>\nThe girl who has everything?\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>This idea of having it all but still being unhappy is also present throughout Britney Jean Spears' life, and infused in one of her most iconic songs, \"Lucky\":\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>She's so lucky, she's a star\u003cbr>\nBut she cry, cry, cries in her lonely heart, thinking\u003cbr>\nIf there's nothing missing in my life\u003cbr>\nThen why do these tears come at night?\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>Here's another overlap. Ariel sings:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>I've got gadgets and gizmos aplenty\u003cbr>\nI've got whozits and whatzits galore\u003cbr>\n[You want thingamabobs? I got twenty]\u003cbr>\nBut who cares?\u003cbr>\nNo big deal\u003cbr>\nI want more\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>You know who else wants more? Britney!\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/elueA2rofoo'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/elueA2rofoo'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\"Part of Your World\" could also be about Britney's desire to just be a regular person who can go to a Starbucks:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>I wanna be where the people are\u003cbr>\nI wanna see\u003cbr>\nWanna see 'em [sippin' grande lattes]\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>Or a beach:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>What would I give\u003cbr>\nIf I could live\u003cbr>\nOutta these waters?\u003cbr>\nWhat would I pay\u003cbr>\nTo spend a day\u003cbr>\nWarm on the sand?\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>Or anywhere else, without being hounded by paparazzi:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>Up where they walk\u003cbr>\nUp where they run\u003cbr>\nUp where they stay all day in the sun\u003cbr>\nWanderin' free\u003cbr>\nWish I could be\u003cbr>\nPart of that world\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>One of my favorite parts of \"Part of Your World\" is when Ariel gets super feminist:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>Betcha on land\u003cbr>\nThey understand\u003cbr>\nBet they don't reprimand their daughters\u003cbr>\nBright young women\u003cbr>\nSick o' swimmin'\u003cbr>\nReady to stand\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>Britney also has a song all about being ready to stand up and claim her agency:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/dIOH8Trfas4'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/dIOH8Trfas4'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Eventually, after hitting rock bottom...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/ariel_so_far_down_in_the_whirlpool_by_arielfan90-d99q31d.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58263\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/ariel_so_far_down_in_the_whirlpool_by_arielfan90-d99q31d.gif\" alt=\"ariel_so_far_down_in_the_whirlpool_by_arielfan90-d99q31d\" width=\"690\" height=\"388\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...both women find their way to a more-or-less happy ending.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/403075933.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58264\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/403075933.gif\" alt=\"britney happy gif\" width=\"450\" height=\"331\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Triton and Britney's dad both realize that it might be a good idea to let their adult daughters be in charge of their own lives.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Sebastian\u003c/b>: Well, it's like I always say, Your Majesty. Children got to be free to lead their own lives.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Triton\u003c/b>: You... always say that? \u003ci>[sighs]\u003c/i> Then I guess there's just one problem left.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Sebastian\u003c/b>: And what's that, Your Majesty?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cb>Triton\u003c/b>: How much I'm going to miss her.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Triton grants Ariel legs so she can live above sea level and marry Eric. And, last year, Britney was freed to get back to making her own decisions in terms of her music career. She was able to call all the shots and have complete control over her last album, \u003cem>Glory\u003c/em>, and it's her best album since the conservatorship was put in place.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>These are just some of the reasons why I believe \u003cem>The Little Mermaid\u003c/em> predicted Britney's entire life. Not completely convinced yet? Here are a few last parallels:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dogs love them:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58270\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994.jpg\" alt=\"img_0994\" width=\"522\" height=\"313\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994.jpg 522w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994-160x96.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994-240x144.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994-375x225.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/img_0994-520x312.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 522px) 100vw, 522px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58269\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538.jpg\" alt=\"celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538\" width=\"675\" height=\"538\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538.jpg 675w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538-160x128.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538-240x191.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538-375x299.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/celebrities-kissing-dogs-11282011-26-675x538-520x414.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 675px) 100vw, 675px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Both have been known to deeply feel themselves in a bad look:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-41194\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-800x447.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2016-10-10 at 9.36.56 PM\" width=\"800\" height=\"447\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-800x447.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-400x224.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-768x430.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-1440x805.png 1440w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-1180x660.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM-960x537.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-9.36.56-PM.png 1679w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/3d68d30837aed0ec6f9da730e30f7953.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58267\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/3d68d30837aed0ec6f9da730e30f7953.jpg\" alt=\"3d68d30837aed0ec6f9da730e30f7953\" width=\"236\" height=\"359\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/3d68d30837aed0ec6f9da730e30f7953.jpg 236w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/3d68d30837aed0ec6f9da730e30f7953-160x243.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 236px) 100vw, 236px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And both have replicas that look nothing like them.\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-41195\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM-800x423.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2016-10-10 at 6.37.27 PM\" width=\"800\" height=\"423\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM-800x423.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM-400x212.png 400w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM-768x406.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM-1180x624.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM-960x508.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/Screen-Shot-2016-10-10-at-6.37.27-PM.png 1199w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58266\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo.jpg\" alt=\"photo\" width=\"768\" height=\"1024\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo-160x213.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo-240x320.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo-375x500.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/photo-520x693.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 768px) 100vw, 768px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I rest my case.\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "Why Britney Spears and Ariel Are Basically the Same Person",
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"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>Did \u003cem>The Little Mermaid\u003c/em> predict Ms. Spears' entire life? Does cursing make you more trustworthy? Find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[audio src=\"https://dts.podtrac.com/redirect.mp3/www.kqed.org/.stream/mp3splice/radio/thecooler/2017/01/Britariel.mp3\" title=\"Why Britney Spears and Ariel Are Basically the Same Person\" program=\"The Cooler\" image=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/03/clo.jpg\"]\u003c/p>\n\u003caside class=\"aligncenter\">\n\u003cdiv>\u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cimg class=\"alignnone\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2016/11/DownloadOniTunes_100x100.png\" width=\"75px\">\u003c/a> \u003ca href=\"https://play.google.com/music/m/Ig3hk6qa4fzcgjp2kagptfgu4u4?t=The_Cooler\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cimg class=\"alignnone\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2016/11/Google_Play_100x100.png\" width=\"75px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/div>\n\u003c/aside>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We start things off with a theory that everything that's happened to Britney Spears happened to Ariel first:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote class=\"embedly-card\">\n\u003ch4>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/19/how-the-little-mermaid-predicted-britney-spears-entire-life/\">How ‘The Little Mermaid’ Predicted Britney Spears’ Entire Life\u003c/a>\u003c/h4>\n\u003cp>A deep-dive into the uncanny parallels between the princess of the sea and the princess of pop.\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>[embedly_js]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We discuss a new study that claims that people who swear are more worthy of trust:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/adele-swear.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-59495\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/adele-swear.gif\" alt=\"adele swear\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We share our favorite pop culture cursing moments:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1dnqKGuezo\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And we ride out on \"Stand Back\" by Stevie Nicks (because why not):\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwdDVZsz2es\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/id1041117499\" target=\"_blank\">Subscribe and rate us in iTunes\u003c/a>! And find us on \u003ca href=\"https://www.facebook.com/KQED-Pop-336039936485067/timeline/\" target=\"_blank\">Facebook\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/kqedpop\" target=\"_blank\">Twitter\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Did 'The Little Mermaid' predict Ms. Spears' entire life? Does cursing make you more trustworthy? Find out! ",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Did \u003cem>The Little Mermaid\u003c/em> predict Ms. Spears' entire life? Does cursing make you more trustworthy? Find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003caside class=\"aligncenter\">\n\u003cdiv>\u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cimg class=\"alignnone\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2016/11/DownloadOniTunes_100x100.png\" width=\"75px\">\u003c/a> \u003ca href=\"https://play.google.com/music/m/Ig3hk6qa4fzcgjp2kagptfgu4u4?t=The_Cooler\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cimg class=\"alignnone\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2016/11/Google_Play_100x100.png\" width=\"75px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/div>\n\u003c/aside>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We start things off with a theory that everything that's happened to Britney Spears happened to Ariel first:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote class=\"embedly-card\">\n\u003ch4>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/19/how-the-little-mermaid-predicted-britney-spears-entire-life/\">How ‘The Little Mermaid’ Predicted Britney Spears’ Entire Life\u003c/a>\u003c/h4>\n\u003cp>A deep-dive into the uncanny parallels between the princess of the sea and the princess of pop.\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>[embedly_js]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We discuss a new study that claims that people who swear are more worthy of trust:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/adele-swear.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-59495\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/adele-swear.gif\" alt=\"adele swear\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We share our favorite pop culture cursing moments:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/l1dnqKGuezo'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/l1dnqKGuezo'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>And we ride out on \"Stand Back\" by Stevie Nicks (because why not):\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/bwdDVZsz2es'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/bwdDVZsz2es'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/id1041117499\" target=\"_blank\">Subscribe and rate us in iTunes\u003c/a>! And find us on \u003ca href=\"https://www.facebook.com/KQED-Pop-336039936485067/timeline/\" target=\"_blank\">Facebook\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/kqedpop\" target=\"_blank\">Twitter\u003c/a>!\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cp>The last art show is up on the walls of \u003ca href=\"http://www.empiresevenstudios.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Empire Seven Studios\u003c/a> – at least, in the gallery Juan Carlos Araujo and Jennifer Ahn opened nearly 10 years ago. A luxury apartment developer bought the building near the corner of Empire and 7th in Japantown late last year, and in a story grown familiar to artists all over the Bay Area, the couple has to leave ahead of the bulldozers.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The new landlord has offered some give room. Empire Seven has until the end of February. After that? It’s anybody’s guess.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Araujo says he’s been exploring several prospects, “but so far, nothing has been signed in ink.” Ideally, he wants to stay in San Jose.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But the \u003ca href=\"https://www.gofundme.com/save-empire-seven\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">GoFundMe campaign\u003c/a> Araujo and Ahn launched has raised about $27,000 — a fraction of what’s necessary to buy another property in this Silicon Valley town. So while the original goal was buying a property, they’d settle for a place to rent at this point in time.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rLlXlMLMNZ0\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>A beloved local institution\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Empire Seven is a labor a love,” says Kristin Farr, a former KQED Arts writer who is now Deputy Editor for \u003ca href=\"http://www.juxtapoz.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Juxtapoz Magazine\u003c/a>. She’s also a visual artist. “They’ve been very good to my husband and me. We’ve shown our art there a lot.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Farr echoes a chorus of people who say Empire Seven is more than a gallery. For many, it’s a champion of emerging talent, and a go-between that brings under-the-radar artists together with established institutions and property owners for all sorts of public works, like murals.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Empire Seven’s current location is not in a fancy part of Japantown. Train tracks are steps away. Trash blows up against the front door. The place was a dusty mess when Araujo and Ahn came in with a broom and an idea nearly 10 years ago.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“You can hear the train in the back,” Araujo says as we talk. “It’s one of the things that sold me on the place. It looked like a diamond in the rough. I took a chance.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_12622585\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-12622585\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-800x450.jpg\" alt=\"A mural by Andrew Schoultz, right around the corner from Empire Seven Studios.\" width=\"800\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-800x450.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-160x90.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-768x432.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut.jpg 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-1180x664.jpg 1180w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-960x541.jpg 960w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-240x135.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-375x211.jpg 375w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-520x293.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">A mural by Andrew Schoultz, right around the corner from Empire Seven Studios. \u003ccite>(Photo: Rachael Myrow/KQED)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>“Are we really doing this?” Ahn recollected on a recent episode of the San Jose-based podcast \u003ca href=\"https://soundcloud.com/jorge-m-sanchez/82-roberto-tinoco-duran\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">JMS\u003c/a>. “Are we really, seriously doing this? It was nothing like it is now, but it all fell into place.” The drywall, the track lighting, the clean, white paint: that wasn’t here before them.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>But Empire Seven is for-profit\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The gallery does receive funding from the San Jose Office of Cultural Affairs. But there’s only so much support San Jose can offer, even though the city has gone to great lengths to help nonprofit arts organizations like the \u003ca href=\"http://www.bagi.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Bay Area Glass Institute\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"http://maclaarte.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Movimiento de Arte y Cultura Latino Americana\u003c/a> rent or buy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Kerry Adams Hapner, Deputy Director of Economic Development for San Jose’s Director of Cultural Affairs, suggested that the couple should think seriously about becoming a nonprofit. “Empire Seven is a mission-driven organization with a public benefit. Becoming a nonprofit requires complete reconsideration of a business model and it is not for everyone, but it may enable them access to more resources. ”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Others aren’t so sure. Anjee Helstrup-Alvarez, Executive Director of MACLA, says “I would NOT suggest that they become a nonprofit organization. People often think that the 501(c)3 tax code structure is the holy grail of ‘free money’ and access to unlimited grants, but that is not the case. To be a nonprofit, you have be willing to live within the legal structure that governs our industry.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_12622586\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-12622586\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-800x450.jpg\" alt='The last show up on the walls, DY*NAS*TY, is representative of the political and artistic aesthetic of Empire Seven. All three artists -- Mesngr, SFaustina and Cristovoe -- came up in graffiti, but work as \"grown-ups\" now in graphic design, animation and retail clothing.' width=\"800\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-800x450.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-160x90.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-768x432.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut.jpg 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-1180x664.jpg 1180w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-960x541.jpg 960w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-240x135.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-375x211.jpg 375w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-520x293.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">The last show up on the walls, DY*NAS*TY, is representative of the political and artistic aesthetic of Empire Seven. All three artists — Mesngr, SFaustina and Cristovoe — came up in graffiti, but work as “grown-ups” now in graphic design, animation and retail clothing. \u003ccite>(Photo: Rachael Myrow/KQED)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>That means a board of directors, by laws, etc, and all of that takes time to establish. It also takes even more time to apply for grants, and then to wait for that money to come through.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So what’s Empire Seven to do in the meantime? Araujo and Ahn are talking to the developer pushing them out about a gallery space in the new building. They might rent gallery space from other outfits to mount exhibitions. They might consult. They might pursue all those options simultaneously.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Whatever the case, Helstrup-Alvarez argues it’s a great idea for Empire Seven to “continue to build public awareness through their murals, public art projects, or pop-up exhibition spaces.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Araujo is cagey about debt. He doesn’t want to take out loans or max out any credit cards. The GoFundMe campaign, he says, should at the least help Empire Seven survive the next few months.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He appreciates all the cash and advice coming his way lately. “You know that you can survive, having all these people behind you.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_12622587\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-12622587\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-800x451.jpg\" alt=\"A familiar sight in San Jose these days, warning of something new and upscale.\" width=\"800\" height=\"451\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-800x451.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-160x90.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-768x433.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-1020x575.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut.jpg 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-1180x665.jpg 1180w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-960x541.jpg 960w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-240x135.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-375x211.jpg 375w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-520x293.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">A familiar sight in San Jose these days, warning of something new and upscale. \u003ccite>(Photo: Rachael Myrow/KQED)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>The last art show is up on the walls of \u003ca href=\"http://www.empiresevenstudios.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Empire Seven Studios\u003c/a> – at least, in the gallery Juan Carlos Araujo and Jennifer Ahn opened nearly 10 years ago. A luxury apartment developer bought the building near the corner of Empire and 7th in Japantown late last year, and in a story grown familiar to artists all over the Bay Area, the couple has to leave ahead of the bulldozers.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The new landlord has offered some give room. Empire Seven has until the end of February. After that? It’s anybody’s guess.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Araujo says he’s been exploring several prospects, “but so far, nothing has been signed in ink.” Ideally, he wants to stay in San Jose.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But the \u003ca href=\"https://www.gofundme.com/save-empire-seven\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">GoFundMe campaign\u003c/a> Araujo and Ahn launched has raised about $27,000 — a fraction of what’s necessary to buy another property in this Silicon Valley town. So while the original goal was buying a property, they’d settle for a place to rent at this point in time.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/rLlXlMLMNZ0'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/rLlXlMLMNZ0'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>A beloved local institution\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Empire Seven is a labor a love,” says Kristin Farr, a former KQED Arts writer who is now Deputy Editor for \u003ca href=\"http://www.juxtapoz.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Juxtapoz Magazine\u003c/a>. She’s also a visual artist. “They’ve been very good to my husband and me. We’ve shown our art there a lot.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Farr echoes a chorus of people who say Empire Seven is more than a gallery. For many, it’s a champion of emerging talent, and a go-between that brings under-the-radar artists together with established institutions and property owners for all sorts of public works, like murals.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Empire Seven’s current location is not in a fancy part of Japantown. Train tracks are steps away. Trash blows up against the front door. The place was a dusty mess when Araujo and Ahn came in with a broom and an idea nearly 10 years ago.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“You can hear the train in the back,” Araujo says as we talk. “It’s one of the things that sold me on the place. It looked like a diamond in the rough. I took a chance.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_12622585\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-12622585\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-800x450.jpg\" alt=\"A mural by Andrew Schoultz, right around the corner from Empire Seven Studios.\" width=\"800\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-800x450.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-160x90.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-768x432.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut.jpg 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-1180x664.jpg 1180w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-960x541.jpg 960w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-240x135.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-375x211.jpg 375w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23585_Photo-Dec-22-10-14-38-AM-001-qut-520x293.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">A mural by Andrew Schoultz, right around the corner from Empire Seven Studios. \u003ccite>(Photo: Rachael Myrow/KQED)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>“Are we really doing this?” Ahn recollected on a recent episode of the San Jose-based podcast \u003ca href=\"https://soundcloud.com/jorge-m-sanchez/82-roberto-tinoco-duran\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">JMS\u003c/a>. “Are we really, seriously doing this? It was nothing like it is now, but it all fell into place.” The drywall, the track lighting, the clean, white paint: that wasn’t here before them.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>But Empire Seven is for-profit\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The gallery does receive funding from the San Jose Office of Cultural Affairs. But there’s only so much support San Jose can offer, even though the city has gone to great lengths to help nonprofit arts organizations like the \u003ca href=\"http://www.bagi.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Bay Area Glass Institute\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"http://maclaarte.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Movimiento de Arte y Cultura Latino Americana\u003c/a> rent or buy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Kerry Adams Hapner, Deputy Director of Economic Development for San Jose’s Director of Cultural Affairs, suggested that the couple should think seriously about becoming a nonprofit. “Empire Seven is a mission-driven organization with a public benefit. Becoming a nonprofit requires complete reconsideration of a business model and it is not for everyone, but it may enable them access to more resources. ”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Others aren’t so sure. Anjee Helstrup-Alvarez, Executive Director of MACLA, says “I would NOT suggest that they become a nonprofit organization. People often think that the 501(c)3 tax code structure is the holy grail of ‘free money’ and access to unlimited grants, but that is not the case. To be a nonprofit, you have be willing to live within the legal structure that governs our industry.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_12622586\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-12622586\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-800x450.jpg\" alt='The last show up on the walls, DY*NAS*TY, is representative of the political and artistic aesthetic of Empire Seven. All three artists -- Mesngr, SFaustina and Cristovoe -- came up in graffiti, but work as \"grown-ups\" now in graphic design, animation and retail clothing.' width=\"800\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-800x450.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-160x90.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-768x432.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut.jpg 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-1180x664.jpg 1180w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-960x541.jpg 960w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-240x135.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-375x211.jpg 375w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23583_Photo-Dec-22-10-07-55-AM-001-qut-520x293.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">The last show up on the walls, DY*NAS*TY, is representative of the political and artistic aesthetic of Empire Seven. All three artists — Mesngr, SFaustina and Cristovoe — came up in graffiti, but work as “grown-ups” now in graphic design, animation and retail clothing. \u003ccite>(Photo: Rachael Myrow/KQED)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>That means a board of directors, by laws, etc, and all of that takes time to establish. It also takes even more time to apply for grants, and then to wait for that money to come through.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So what’s Empire Seven to do in the meantime? Araujo and Ahn are talking to the developer pushing them out about a gallery space in the new building. They might rent gallery space from other outfits to mount exhibitions. They might consult. They might pursue all those options simultaneously.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Whatever the case, Helstrup-Alvarez argues it’s a great idea for Empire Seven to “continue to build public awareness through their murals, public art projects, or pop-up exhibition spaces.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Araujo is cagey about debt. He doesn’t want to take out loans or max out any credit cards. The GoFundMe campaign, he says, should at the least help Empire Seven survive the next few months.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He appreciates all the cash and advice coming his way lately. “You know that you can survive, having all these people behind you.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_12622587\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-12622587\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-800x451.jpg\" alt=\"A familiar sight in San Jose these days, warning of something new and upscale.\" width=\"800\" height=\"451\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-800x451.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-160x90.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-768x433.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-1020x575.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut.jpg 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-1180x665.jpg 1180w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-960x541.jpg 960w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-240x135.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-375x211.jpg 375w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/01/RS23586_Photo-Dec-22-10-12-50-AM-001-qut-520x293.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">A familiar sight in San Jose these days, warning of something new and upscale. \u003ccite>(Photo: Rachael Myrow/KQED)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"title": "Don't Know How to Knit? Make Your Own 'Pussy Hat' Out of Paper!",
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"content": "\u003cp>Since its inception over Thanksgiving weekend, the\u003ca href=\"https://www.pussyhatproject.com/\"> Pussyhat Project\u003c/a> has inspired women and their allies nationwide to \u003ca href=\"https://www.pussyhatproject.com/knit/\">knit\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.pussyhatproject.com/crochet/\">crochet\u003c/a>, or \u003ca href=\"https://www.pussyhatproject.com/sew/\">sew\u003c/a> kitten-shaped hats in solidarity with the \u003ca href=\"https://www.womensmarch.com/\">Women's March\u003c/a> in Washington. The obvious message of the double-entendre is to stand in opposition to a President-elect who \u003ca href=\"http://www.slate.com/blogs/the_slatest/2016/10/07/donald_trump_2005_tape_i_grab_women_by_the_pussy.html\">famously bragged about\u003c/a> his predilection for grabbing women without their consent, and the accessories serve both a practical and a symbolic purpose: to keep marchers warm, and serve as a mark of unity for those defending basic human rights.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because I am someone who values the rights of women in my life -- and all the women I'll never meet -- I wanted to knit a pussy hat of my own. Alas, my erstwhile knitting phase only lasted two months, yielding only half of a scarf and one very random trip to a baseball game with the office knitting club. But I wasn't going to let my lack of expertise get in the way of this historical moment. I found a way to create a pussy hat using the limited arts & crafts skills I do possess (mainly cutting, gluing, and doodling). Susan B. Anthony would have wanted it this way. If you have limited knitting skills, you probably will also.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Here's a step-by-step guide on how I made my pussy hat, and how you can too!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You'll need:\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>Glue\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>Scissors\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>Ruler\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>Marker\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>Construction paper in multiple colors\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>1. Place construction paper of whatever color you want for the head band lengthwise. Measure an inch and a half, mark the paper with a horizontal line at that point, and then cut along it. Repeat.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/01-band.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-59165\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/01-band.gif\" alt=\"01-band\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>2. Glue the two strips together at either end to make a circle.\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/04-assembling.gif\">\u003cbr>\n\u003c/a> \u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/03-eyes-snout.gif\">\u003cbr>\n\u003c/a> \u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/02-cat-face.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-59169\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/02-cat-face.gif\" alt=\"02-cat-face\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>3. Grab construction paper of whatever color you want for the cat's face. Trace the outline of a cat head with ears. Cut out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-59168\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/03-eyes-snout.gif\" alt=\"03-eyes-snout\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>4. Draw two eyes on a white piece of paper with a marker. Cut out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>5. Cut out two circles of a color of your choice for the irises.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>6. Cut out two smaller circles from black paper for the pupils.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>7. Cut even smaller circles from white paper for eye glimmers.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>8. Draw the outline of a cat mouth on white paper. Cut out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>9. Color in a nose and a tongue with a marker.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>10. Create fringe by cutting thin strips into white paper. Snip off at a length of four inches. These will serve as whiskers!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>11. Cut two cute little teeth from the white paper.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-59167\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/04-assembling.gif\" alt=\"04-assembling\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>12. Glue the whites of the eyes to your cat face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>13. Glue the irises to the eyes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat.png\">\u003cimg class=\"alignright wp-image-59261\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-160x172.png\" alt=\"me-pussyhat\" width=\"300\" height=\"323\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-160x172.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-800x860.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-768x826.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-960x1032.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-240x258.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-375x403.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-520x559.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat.png 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\">\u003c/a>14. Glue the pupils to the irises.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>15. Glue the glimmers to the pupils.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>16. Glue the cat's mouth onto the face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>17. Attach teeth and whiskers.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>18. Glue head band to the back of the cat face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Et voilà!\u003c/em> Now, you're ready to show some solidarity at your local Women's March (or just walk around with a cat face on your head for no reason)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/821463234259496960\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Want to learn more about the Pussyhat phenomenon? Check out this piece from \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/news/programs/the-california-report/\">The California Report\u003c/a>:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://ww2.kqed.org/news/2017/01/17/l-a-s-pussyhat-project-crafts-a-political-statement/\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Want to particpate in the Pussyhat Project, but don't know the first thing about knitting? No sweat; these instructions are for you! ",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Since its inception over Thanksgiving weekend, the\u003ca href=\"https://www.pussyhatproject.com/\"> Pussyhat Project\u003c/a> has inspired women and their allies nationwide to \u003ca href=\"https://www.pussyhatproject.com/knit/\">knit\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.pussyhatproject.com/crochet/\">crochet\u003c/a>, or \u003ca href=\"https://www.pussyhatproject.com/sew/\">sew\u003c/a> kitten-shaped hats in solidarity with the \u003ca href=\"https://www.womensmarch.com/\">Women's March\u003c/a> in Washington. The obvious message of the double-entendre is to stand in opposition to a President-elect who \u003ca href=\"http://www.slate.com/blogs/the_slatest/2016/10/07/donald_trump_2005_tape_i_grab_women_by_the_pussy.html\">famously bragged about\u003c/a> his predilection for grabbing women without their consent, and the accessories serve both a practical and a symbolic purpose: to keep marchers warm, and serve as a mark of unity for those defending basic human rights.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because I am someone who values the rights of women in my life -- and all the women I'll never meet -- I wanted to knit a pussy hat of my own. Alas, my erstwhile knitting phase only lasted two months, yielding only half of a scarf and one very random trip to a baseball game with the office knitting club. But I wasn't going to let my lack of expertise get in the way of this historical moment. I found a way to create a pussy hat using the limited arts & crafts skills I do possess (mainly cutting, gluing, and doodling). Susan B. Anthony would have wanted it this way. If you have limited knitting skills, you probably will also.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Here's a step-by-step guide on how I made my pussy hat, and how you can too!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You'll need:\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>Glue\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>Scissors\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>Ruler\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>Marker\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>Construction paper in multiple colors\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>1. Place construction paper of whatever color you want for the head band lengthwise. Measure an inch and a half, mark the paper with a horizontal line at that point, and then cut along it. Repeat.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/01-band.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-59165\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/01-band.gif\" alt=\"01-band\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>2. Glue the two strips together at either end to make a circle.\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/04-assembling.gif\">\u003cbr>\n\u003c/a> \u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/03-eyes-snout.gif\">\u003cbr>\n\u003c/a> \u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/02-cat-face.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-59169\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/02-cat-face.gif\" alt=\"02-cat-face\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>3. Grab construction paper of whatever color you want for the cat's face. Trace the outline of a cat head with ears. Cut out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-59168\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/03-eyes-snout.gif\" alt=\"03-eyes-snout\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>4. Draw two eyes on a white piece of paper with a marker. Cut out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>5. Cut out two circles of a color of your choice for the irises.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>6. Cut out two smaller circles from black paper for the pupils.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>7. Cut even smaller circles from white paper for eye glimmers.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>8. Draw the outline of a cat mouth on white paper. Cut out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>9. Color in a nose and a tongue with a marker.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>10. Create fringe by cutting thin strips into white paper. Snip off at a length of four inches. These will serve as whiskers!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>11. Cut two cute little teeth from the white paper.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-59167\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/04-assembling.gif\" alt=\"04-assembling\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>12. Glue the whites of the eyes to your cat face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>13. Glue the irises to the eyes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat.png\">\u003cimg class=\"alignright wp-image-59261\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-160x172.png\" alt=\"me-pussyhat\" width=\"300\" height=\"323\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-160x172.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-800x860.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-768x826.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-960x1032.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-240x258.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-375x403.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat-520x559.png 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/me-pussyhat.png 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\">\u003c/a>14. Glue the pupils to the irises.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>15. Glue the glimmers to the pupils.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>16. Glue the cat's mouth onto the face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>17. Attach teeth and whiskers.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>18. Glue head band to the back of the cat face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Et voilà!\u003c/em> Now, you're ready to show some solidarity at your local Women's March (or just walk around with a cat face on your head for no reason)!\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Want to learn more about the Pussyhat phenomenon? Check out this piece from \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/news/programs/the-california-report/\">The California Report\u003c/a>:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Victoria' Season 1 Premiere Recap: Bow Down",
"title": "'Victoria' Season 1 Premiere Recap: Bow Down",
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"content": "\u003cp>\u003cem>Hi there! You might remember me from \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey/\">Downton Abbey\u003c/a>\u003cem> or \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">Poldark\u003c/a>\u003cem> recaps of yore. Since those shows wrapped, I've felt a void in my spirit that can only be filled by PBS-approved British imports. So I'm going to try falling in love again; this time, with a show called \u003c/em>Victoria\u003cem>. I hope you'll join me. Let's do this!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Pastel clouds greet a pleasant sunrise in the English countryside... but there's no time to appreciate that right now because there's a bunch of text on the screen! It's 1837, the year that daguerreotypes and \u003cem>Oliver Twist\u003c/em> became a thing. William IV is the king and apparently in some trouble. His niece Alexandrina is his heir.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, before we get any further, here are a few interesting things I found out about this William dude, after researching him for the past hour:\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>He joined the Royal Navy at 13. While stationed in North America, George Washington tried to kidnap him!\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>Because William IV was so far down the line of succession (he was the third son of King George III), he decided \u003cem>Ah, screw it!\u003c/em>, shacked up with an actress with a bad reputation and had ten \"illegitimate\" kids. Get it, Willie!\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>After the deaths of his father, both his older brothers, and his niece, he became an unexpected King at the ripe age of 64. Under his reign, slavery was abolished in nearly all of the British Empire and child labor was restricted. Huzzah for common decency!\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>In his final months, William gave a blistering speech at a banquet about how much he hoped he wouldn't croak before his niece was of age, so that her no-good, sneaky mother wouldn't get her hands on the powers of the crown. Queen Victoria -- then Alexandrina -- burst into tears from shock. But she still thought fondly of him because he was kind of right.\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>So that sets us up for what we're about to see. Back to the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A messenger arrives at Kensington Palace wearing a black armband. Our homeboy William IV is dead. Well, that was quick!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-20.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-57689\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-20.gif\" alt=\"giphy-20\" width=\"500\" height=\"324\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/The-African-Queen-GIF-1.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-57690\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/The-African-Queen-GIF-1.gif\" alt=\"the-african-queen-gif-1\" width=\"500\" height=\"363\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We hardly knew ye!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I'm more upset about his passing than anyone at this mansion is. Some dude named Sir John is basically like, \u003cem>Ugh, finally!\u003c/em> Alexandrina is so jazzed that she walks down a set of stairs WITHOUT HOLDING ONTO HER GOVERNESS.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After pretending to be bummed out about her dead uncle in front of the Archbishop for three seconds, she dances around the palace with her cute dog before heading to her room to blast the \"Bow down, b-tches!\" part of \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=geEMtwkBZVk\">that Beyoncé song\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Upstairs, Sir John and her mother are already trying to take control, starting with the Queen's name. They both agree Alexandrina is way too ethnic and that her middle name Victoria is super lame. Elizabeth will do. Or Ann.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alexandrina interrupts: \u003cem>Um, guys? Sorry to interrupt your little planning sesh, but I just saw the Archbishop alone and I intend to handle my own business forever and ever without your help. Cool? Oh, and I went down a staircase without assistance earlier.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-21.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-57705\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-21.gif\" alt=\"giphy-21\" width=\"500\" height=\"250\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sir John and co. are horrified by the idea of a grown woman having opinions and making her own decisions:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/IVVeY.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-57706\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/IVVeY.gif\" alt=\"ivvey\" width=\"360\" height=\"288\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In town, randoms are gossiping about how they've heard Alexandrina's tongue is too big for her mouth. Burn books were so quaint back then.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the palace, the governess tries to hold a lesson with Alexandrina, who replies with a \u003cem>Meh, I know enough. \u003c/em>The governess is bummed that she is now obsolete and must return to her native Germany, but she is quickly promoted to household dictator. The governess gleefully runs to the downstairs kitchen to be rude to all the servants for no reason.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later in the day, Lord Melbourne, the Prime Minister, arrives to kick it with Alexandrina. Sir John intercepts him and gives a speech about how Alexandrina is a homeschooled weirdo and needs him to be in charge of her affairs. Lord Melbourne pulls one of these:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/diss.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-37158\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/diss.gif\" alt=\"chappelle show diss gif\" width=\"400\" height=\"267\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After some small talk about dolls and ugly, pumpkin-headed suitors, Lord Melbourne brings up Sir John's attempts at seizing control. Alexandrina delivers a quick and strong \u003cem>NOPE!\u003c/em> Melbourne then slyly tries to pull a fast one: \u003cem>TOTALLY, but reading stuff can be quite hard. Your itty-bitty lady brain wouldn't like it. Let me do it! \u003c/em>Alexandrina responds by throwing a Betty Friedan book at his face and burning a bra.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, okay, she didn't exactly react like that, but she did firmly say no.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/picgifs-nope-400931.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-57716\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/picgifs-nope-400931.gif\" alt=\"picgifs-nope-400931\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, a bunch of Lords assemble to kiss the new Queen's hand. But before all the germ-spreading can commence, Alexandrina must give a speech. Her jealous uncle -- who, like the jealous uncle in \u003cem>The Lion King\u003c/em>, has a huge scar on his face -- interrupts to say she isn't talking loud enough. So she turns the volume and the content way up: \u003cem>Because you all are sexist and ageist as hell, you don't think I'm going to do well. Watch me.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mhihjztjut1qbh0eio1_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-57724\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mhihjztjut1qbh0eio1_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_mhihjztjut1qbh0eio1_500\" width=\"500\" height=\"238\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alexandrina goes to the balcony and proclaims herself Queen Victoria, a name change without which Prince may have never been referred to as \u003ca href=\"http://www.slate.com/blogs/the_eye/2016/04/21/the_story_behind_prince_s_unpronounceable_love_symbol_2.html\">an unpronounceable symbol\u003c/a>. It's a major moment, yet all I can focus on is the actress' horrible colored contacts. They make her look possessed!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58528\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM.png\" alt=\"screen-shot-2017-01-13-at-4-20-24-pm\" width=\"640\" height=\"399\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM.png 989w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-160x100.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-800x498.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-768x478.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-960x598.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-240x149.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-375x234.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-520x324.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58529\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM.png\" alt=\"screen-shot-2017-01-13-at-4-19-57-pm\" width=\"640\" height=\"468\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM.png 872w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM-160x117.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM-800x584.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM-768x561.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM-240x175.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM-375x274.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM-520x380.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58527\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.43-PM.png\" alt=\"screen-shot-2017-01-13-at-4-20-43-pm\" width=\"575\" height=\"341\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.43-PM.png 575w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.43-PM-160x95.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.43-PM-240x142.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.43-PM-375x222.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.43-PM-520x308.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 575px) 100vw, 575px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyway, some time later, Governess Dictator hires a wide-eyed servant girl. The senior servants are royally pissed over not being consulted:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QCMs8dUWZus\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Upstairs, Victoria is hanging out with her only friends: her dolls and a portrait of her dead dad (#HomeschoolLife). Sir John bursts in, makes fun of her for still playing with dolls, and shuffles around important documents, in an attempt to convince Victoria that she didn't already fire him. When that doesn't work, he takes a more aggressive approach, by getting in Victoria's face and spitting: \"What can a girl like you -- \u003cem>unformed\u003c/em> -- possibly do to serve her country?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/she-came-that-way.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58530\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/she-came-that-way.gif\" alt=\"she-came-that-way\" width=\"245\" height=\"225\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Calling her \"unformed\" is one thing, but insulting her best doll friends? Oh, hell nah. Victoria sets him straight by yelling: \"IF I REQUIRE ADVICE, I WILL ASK FOR IT! Sir John, you have our permission to withdraw.\" That's polite royal talk for \"GTFO and TTYN, loser.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/17028425.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58531\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/17028425.gif\" alt=\"17028425\" width=\"500\" height=\"339\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria's mom's eye twitches, as Sir John limps backwards out of the room like a beaten puppy. Feminist Teen Queens: 1; Men Who Think Rocking Mutton Chops Makes Them Hot: 0.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Downstairs, Babyface Maid tries to mend some fancy gloves. Her boss tells her not to bother; the Queen never wears a pair more than once. Okay, Victoria seems chill and all, but I can see why head-chopping revolutions happen. The servants have their own way of sticking it to The Man though; they secretly sell the Queen's gloves, shoes, and other accessories, and pocket the money. Power to the ballsy, poor people! Get them coins!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-32.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58802\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-32.gif\" alt=\"giphy (32)\" width=\"500\" height=\"452\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, Victoria whines. \u003cem>Sir John is, like, sooo annoying! And mom's other friend, Flora, walked into my room without knocking!\u003c/em> If this were a century or two earlier, Victoria would simply have them both killed, but it's the 19th century, so she decides to just move to a bigger mansion -- the recently-completed Buckingham Palace -- where she can keep them sequestered in whichever wing gets the least natural light. All is fair in love and real estate.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And now, it's time for a montage of everyone we've met so far running around the new digs, freaking out over all the chandeliers, and chanting, \"Started from the bottom, now we're here!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Babyface Maid spots Victoria for the first time and is so dumbfounded that she blurts out this dumb statement: \"She is small, but she ain't no midget.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58801\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/short.gif\" alt=\"short\" width=\"470\" height=\"188\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Moments later, the Prime Minister eases Victoria's worries that no one takes her seriously because of her height by declaring: \"Anyone who dares comment on your stature should be sent straight to the Tower!\" (Sayonara, Babyface!) Victoria rewards him for waging a war against heightists -- and for being sort of sexy, if you squint a little -- by giving him a cute nickname -- Lord M -- and allowing him to be her Private Secretary.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_n9yz2e80Qt1tp719lo1_r1_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58800\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_n9yz2e80Qt1tp719lo1_r1_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_n9yz2e80Qt1tp719lo1_r1_500\" width=\"500\" height=\"261\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere, Victoria's mom is really bummed that she and her friends have been put in the North Wing, far away from Victoria's room in the South Wing (#FirstWorldProblems). Sir John takes the opportunity to play a few more B-sides from his Victoria-is-a-stupid-shrimpy-loser broken record, only to be interrupted by the Queen herself. Sir John pounces and tries to make Victoria pick her maids-of-honor on the spot. Victoria gives him the silent treatment and a look that says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/anigif_enhanced-4773-1430938663-26.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-36234\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/anigif_enhanced-4773-1430938663-26.gif\" alt=\"get off my jock gif bethenny\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Not taking the hint, Flora pulls out a list of potential girls and ensures that none of them are tall whores. Victoria doubles down on her request for everyone to get off her jock:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/i-just-want-you-off-my-jock-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58681\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/i-just-want-you-off-my-jock-gif.gif\" alt=\"i-just-want-you-off-my-jock-gif\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that day, Victoria tells Babyface Maid she wants to change things up with an \u003cem>au courant\u003c/em> hairstyle. Babyface Maid doesn't know what\u003cem> au courant\u003c/em> means, despite telling all the servants earlier that she has studied French. So she's a liar \u003cem>and\u003c/em> hates short people. Got it. They end up going with braids that go under and around the ears, which soon became the 19th century version of \u003ca href=\"http://parade.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/Jennifer-Aniston-The-Rachel-Hairstyle-ftr.jpg\">The Rachel\u003c/a>™.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few days later, Flora continues to pester Victoria. Apparently, Victoria accidentally turned her back on some troops.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Victoria:\u003c/strong> \"No one mentioned this to me.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Flora:\u003c/strong> \"I assure you, they noticed, but no one likes to correct their monarch, ma'am.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Victoria:\u003c/strong> \"Except for you, evidently.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-24.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58689\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-24.gif\" alt=\"giphy-24\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere in the palace, Governess Dictator is yelling at a servant for wasting too much money on beeswax candles. She doesn't know the help is selling them off, along with all the Queen's other once-used belongings, but something tells me she will soon and the reckoning will be glorious.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Days later, Victoria and Lord M are trotting around on horses and chatting about how everyone thinks they're bumping uglies. Victoria asks if the reason he's single is because he's still clinically depressed about his wife running away with Lord Byron and then dying (yes, that \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lord_Byron\">Lord Byron\u003c/a>!). Lord M is like, \u003cem>Um, yeah. Thanks for bringing that up.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day is the Royal Coronation Ball. Everyone who's anyone is in attendance... except for Lord M, who is crying in the dark at his house, while smelling a lock of hair. Yikes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before heading into the ballroom, Sir John, who's still allowed to live in the palace for some reason, reminds Victoria to not get too wasted or do anything slutty. Victoria is like:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-25.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58697\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-25.gif\" alt=\"giphy-25\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It wouldn't be a ball without a few scandals:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Scandal #1:\u003c/strong> The servants swapped out all the beeswax candles for cheap tallow candles, which are dripping wax all over the guests.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Scandal #2:\u003c/strong> \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alexander_II_of_Russia\">Alexander II\u003c/a>, the son of the Russian Emperor, gets a bit too handsy with Victoria, while dancing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The latter is broken up, thanks to Lord M (who dried his tears and showed up, after all). Victoria deals with being groped by chugging lots of champagne and basically confessing her love for Lord M: \"You dance so well. I wish I could dance with you every night.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Lick_your_lips.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58698\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Lick_your_lips.gif\" alt=\"lick_your_lips\" width=\"500\" height=\"187\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A little later, Governess Dictator pulls Victoria aside to Wikileak \u003cstrong>Scandal #3:\u003c/strong> Flora appears to be pregnant! And the baby is probably Sir John's!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria goes and yells at Sir John, who then calls her a drunk. Victoria's measured reply:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/3d34e403-b4c9-45bd-8c93-91efec18a2a8.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58699\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/3d34e403-b4c9-45bd-8c93-91efec18a2a8.gif\" alt=\"3d34e403-b4c9-45bd-8c93-91efec18a2a8\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After some sloppy 19th century twerking, Flora interrupts Victoria on the dance floor to relay a message. The music stops just in time for everyone to hear Victoria yell, \"Mama sent \u003cem>you\u003c/em> to tell \u003cem>me\u003c/em> what to do??\" Lord M quickly escorts Victoria out and makes her go to bed before she pukes on everyone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The following day, Victoria somehow doesn't have a raging hangover. She informs her mom about Flora's scandalous pregnancy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/What-Happens-When-You-Deliver-Large-Baby.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58707\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/What-Happens-When-You-Deliver-Large-Baby.gif\" alt=\"what-happens-when-you-deliver-large-baby\" width=\"400\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Flora and Sir John commiserate over not being invited to the Coronation ceremony and hating Victoria's guts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-26.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58708\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-26.gif\" alt=\"giphy-26\" width=\"500\" height=\"260\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While Victoria is being coronated, she has ordered that Flora undergo a medical examination to prove to everyone that she's a pregnant floozy. This plan backfires when the doctors conclude Flora is \u003cem>virgo intacta\u003c/em> and actually has a huge tumor growing inside of her.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Bad-This-is-bad-My-bad-Oops-GIF.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58716\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Bad-This-is-bad-My-bad-Oops-GIF.gif\" alt=\"bad-this-is-bad-my-bad-oops-gif\" width=\"468\" height=\"263\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria's evil uncle Scar sees an opportunity. He leaks the scandalous story of the Queen forcing a humiliating examination upon an innocent dying woman and calls for the powers of the crown to be turned over to him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Flora takes a turn for the worst and Victoria is pressured to hang out at her deathbed. This proves to be quite awkward and goes a little something like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Flora:\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/baby-box-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58726\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/baby-box-gif.gif\" alt=\"baby-box-gif\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Victoria:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Ummm, hiiiii. Being sick totally sucks. Want me to send you some peaches? They'll fix you right up!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Flora: \u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-20-1.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58717\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-20-1.gif\" alt=\"giphy-20\" width=\"400\" height=\"223\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Victoria:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Anyway, that whole exam thing was my bad. We cool?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Flora:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>You're going to hell. Now leave me alone so I can die.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Victoria:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_m15vqg8mRd1r5aheq.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58725\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_m15vqg8mRd1r5aheq.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_m15vqg8mRd1r5aheq\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The following day, Governess Dictator finds out about the glove-selling ring. She correctly accuses the lead maid, Mrs. Jenkins, but Babyface Maid confesses because Jesus would have also taken the blame for a random misdemeanor or something. Governess Dictator tells Victoria, who responds:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/wvr.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58728\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/wvr.gif\" alt=\"wvr\" width=\"500\" height=\"337\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/90081_idgaf-i-dont-care-christina-aguilera-nobody-cares.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58727\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/90081_idgaf-i-dont-care-christina-aguilera-nobody-cares.gif\" alt=\"90081_idgaf-i-dont-care-christina-aguilera-nobody-cares\" width=\"500\" height=\"351\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that day, Victoria's mom bursts in crying. Flora is dead. And she believes Victoria \"drove her to her grave.\" Victoria somehow manages to make it all about her: \u003cem>Sorry about your dead friend and all, but Sir John always makes fun of my height and you never defend me! Leave me alone!!!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Lord M finds Victoria sitting at a piano, having a full-blown anxiety attack about how everyone thinks she killed a virgin. He confesses that he often wishes he was dead because his young son died some years ago, but that he pretends to be okay with this whole being alive thing, and she should too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next time Victoria is in front of the public, they yell about her being a virgin murderer, but she takes Lord M's advice and cooly pretends to be OK with being alive.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some time passes. Uncle Scar continues to travel around, talking smack about his niece and encouraging rumors that something inappropriate is going on between her and Lord M. He selflessly offers to take control of things, if needed.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-28.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58750\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-28.gif\" alt=\"giphy (28)\" width=\"533\" height=\"300\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria finds out slavery is still a thing in the Caribbean. She's like, \u003cem>Oh, I'll just fix that then\u003c/em>. Lord M is like, \u003cem>Ha ha ha. We can't just be decent human beings, silly. We have to let a bunch of white privileged men debate the economic losses associated with letting other human beings have basic rights first.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sir John bursts in and demands that Victoria give her mother the title of Queen Mother. Victoria is like:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/310bd726b77ad245d304a77f78b459f7.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58751\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/310bd726b77ad245d304a77f78b459f7.gif\" alt=\"310bd726b77ad245d304a77f78b459f7\" width=\"499\" height=\"225\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Downstairs, Governess Dictator orders men to install gas lighting. Try selling candles now, riff-raff! The workers open up a wall and AN AVALANCHE OF RATS FALLS OUT. THEY SCURRY ALL OVER THE KITCHEN. AHHHHH!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-29.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58754\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-29.gif\" alt=\"giphy (29)\" width=\"500\" height=\"273\">\u003c/a>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/scared02.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58753\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/scared02.gif\" alt=\"scared02\" width=\"500\" height=\"342\">\u003c/a>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-30.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58752\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-30.gif\" alt=\"giphy (30)\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back upstairs, the results of the slavery vote are in. By six votes, the Parliament decided enslaving people is bad!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tenor.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58769\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tenor.gif\" alt=\"tenor\" width=\"498\" height=\"243\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But Lord M has to step down and stop talking to Victoria because his party has been weakened.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/iooo.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58772\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/iooo.gif\" alt=\"iooo\" width=\"251\" height=\"251\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A wailing Victoria goes outside in the rain and uses her closed umbrella to attack hedges.\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/why.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58770\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/why.gif\" alt=\"why\" width=\"245\" height=\"160\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Eventually, she calms down and interviews a potential replacement for the Prime Minister, the Duke of Wellington. He turns the position down because he's old and has been there, done that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/giphy-8.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19744\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/giphy-8.gif\" alt=\"honey boo boo no thank you gif\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a> \u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/tumblr_n2hhznE3Ub1rfduvxo1_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19743\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/tumblr_n2hhznE3Ub1rfduvxo1_250.gif\" alt=\"honey boo boo too much gif\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a> \u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/tumblr_n2dkpmzid11rfduvxo1_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19742\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/tumblr_n2dkpmzid11rfduvxo1_250.gif\" alt=\"honey boo boo bye gif\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Downstairs, the lead maid turns on the brand new gas line and takes her sweet time finding a flame. Her hand is consumed by a fireball. Babyface Maid runs to fetch some butter for the burn, but gets distracted by a hot chef, who says, \"You can have butter, if you like, but I can give you something better.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/oprah-face.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58780\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/oprah-face.gif\" alt=\"oprah-face\" width=\"415\" height=\"212\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He tells her to close her eyes so he can show her \"a surprise.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And then shows her his...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/732978471.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58781\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/732978471.gif\" alt=\"732978471\" width=\"300\" height=\"225\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...freezer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/1478238113-oprah-winfrey-notimpressed.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58782\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/1478238113-oprah-winfrey-notimpressed.gif\" alt=\"1478238113-oprah-winfrey-notimpressed\" width=\"300\" height=\"171\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back upstairs, Victoria is mad about a new coin that makes her look like she has a double chin. Her problems are so relatable.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Another possible candidate for the Prime Minister position by the name of Robert Peel shows up. He says the coin looks just like her. Uh oh! He then mansplains how the British government works. Double uh oh! Then he demands that she replace her ladies with women from his political party. Triple uh oh! Victoria isn't having any of it:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/gtfo13.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58783\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/gtfo13.gif\" alt=\"gtfo13\" width=\"375\" height=\"247\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Uncle Scar is doing lines of 19th century coke, when Sir John comes in. They plot to convince everyone that Victoria is insane like her grandfather and unfit to rule.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Victoria keeps trying to convince Lord M to get over himself and agree to stay Prime Minister. Lord M screams the lyrics to Taylor Swift's \"We Are Never Ever Ever Getting Back Together.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/JmW19.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58784\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/JmW19.gif\" alt=\"JmW19\" width=\"500\" height=\"256\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, Victoria can't sleep and decides to sit in front of a portrait of her insane grandfather. Her mother comes to hang out in a chic toilet paper headpiece.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-58787\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2017-01-15 at 1.06.29 AM\" width=\"300\" height=\"401\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM.png 701w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM-160x214.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM-240x321.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM-375x501.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM-520x695.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria's mom assures her that she won't let anyone take away her power. One way to respond is for Victoria to be chill for once and just hug her mom and say \"Thanks.\" Instead, she gives her mom a hard time for hanging out with Sir John and never protecting her in the past. Yeesh. At least she didn't bring up her \u003cem>I'm short and super sad about it\u003c/em> hang-up again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day is Victoria's birthday. The hot chef presents his impressive multi-tiered cake, topped with a likeness of the Queen and her cute dog. Some kids sing \"God Save the Queen\" and Victoria talks through it. Sir John tries to give Victoria a present and she pretends he's not there. Everyone almost dies of awkwardness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria opens a gift from Lord M. Will it be a love letter? A lock of his hair? A nude photo?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Excited-Baby-Opening-Present.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58796\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Excited-Baby-Opening-Present.gif\" alt=\"Excited-Baby-Opening-Present\" width=\"332\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's a telescope.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/waqrg59iicwip04mmswz.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58797\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/waqrg59iicwip04mmswz.gif\" alt=\"waqrg59iicwip04mmswz\" width=\"434\" height=\"261\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Next up: her mother's gift.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Excited-Baby-Opening-Present.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58796\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Excited-Baby-Opening-Present.gif\" alt=\"Excited-Baby-Opening-Present\" width=\"332\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's a copy of \u003cem>King Lear\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/dsppntmnt.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58798\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/dsppntmnt.gif\" alt=\"dsppntmnt\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>With a very rude passage underlined: \"How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/How-Rude-Stephanie-Full-House.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58899\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/How-Rude-Stephanie-Full-House.gif\" alt=\"How-Rude-Stephanie-Full-House\" width=\"320\" height=\"256\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before Victoria can even react, RATS ARE ALL OVER HER CAKE! Victoria understandably loses her sh-t.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cut to Uncle Scar's cocaine den. He's sniffing and spinning the story with Sir John's help. She was in hysterics! Maybe she hallucinated the rats! Muahaha!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Victoria tries to unveil her royal painting by pulling a tarp off of it. She can't manage it because she has poor upper body strength and/or is not used to doing very basic things like pulling. Lord M swoops in to help and casually says, \u003cem>Oh, hey, I'll be your Prime Minister again. Sorry about yelling Taylor Swift breakup lyrics in your face for the past couple of weeks. \u003c/em>Is he serious? All that running around for nothing? If it wasn't for his wife running off and his kid dying, I might hold a grudge, but I'll just move on.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a dark alley, some random tries to get Babyface Maid to sell herself and won't take no for an answer. Thankfully, the hot cook swoops in. Turns out he's been stalking her, but in the cute way. He reveals that he recognizes her from some former house of ill repute, but he doesn't care. He just wants to date. Aww (I think)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the palace, Lord M and Victoria gaze longingly across a room at each other. Some dude tells Lord M that this googly-eyed business won't last for long, as Victoria will soon wed. But Lord M knows that marriage doesn't mean anything. Just ask Lord Byron.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: Sir John. \u003c/strong>The uncle has a scar over his eye, which means he has no choice but to be evil. What's this guy's excuse?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: William IV. \u003c/strong>I would totally watch a show about him and his 10 \"illegitimate\" children.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong> \u003cstrong>Hot Chef. \u003c/strong>That cake was impressive. And so is his face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>SILVER: \u003cstrong>Flora. \u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>If anyone has earned the right to say \"\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9l7S1hnRPF0\">That was way harsh, Tai,\u003c/a>\" it's this virgin who can't drive.\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>GOLD: Victoria. \u003c/strong>Duh.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Until next week! If you miss me, \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/author/ehapsis/\">read some of my other work \u003c/a>or \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">follow me on Twitter @xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108303/victoria-season-3-finale-recap-matchmaker-matchmaker\">'Victoria' Season 3 Finale Recap: Matchmaker, Matchmaker\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108301/victoria-season-3-episode-7-recap-california-love\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 7 Recap: California Love\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108299/victoria-season-3-episode-6-recap-love-on-the-brain\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 6 Recap: Love on the Brain\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108293/victoria-season-3-episode-5-recap-on-the-road-again\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 5 Recap: On The Road Again\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108291/victoria-season-3-episode-4-recap-ill-be-missing-you\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 4 Recap: I'll Be Missing You\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108289/victoria-season-3-episode-3-recap-la-isla-bonita\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 3 Recap: La Isla Bonita\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108287/victoria-season-3-episode-2-recap-the-guns-of-brixton\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 2 Recap: The Guns of Brixton\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108284/victoria-season-3-premiere-recap-god-save-the-queen\">'Victoria' Season 3 Premiere Recap: God Save The Queen\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97779/victoria-season-2-finale-recap-its-a-hard-knock-life\">'Victoria' Season 2 Finale Recap: It's a Hard-Knock Life\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97777/victoria-season-2-episode-6-recap-somewhere-over-the-rainbow\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 6 Recap: Somewhere Over The Rainbow\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97775/victoria-season-2-episode-5-recap-lost-and-found\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 5 Recap: Lost and Found\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97773/victoria-season-2-episode-4-recap-people-are-people\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 4 Recap: People Are People\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97771/victoria-season-2-episode-3-recap-daddy-issues\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 3 Recap: Daddy Issues\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97769/victoria-season-2-episode-2-recap-puppy-love\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 2 Recap: Puppy Love\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97767/victoria-season-2-premiere-recap-baby-its-cold-outside\">'Victoria' Season 2 Premiere Recap: Baby It's Cold Outside\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/56546/victoria-season-1-finale-recap-bye-bye-baby-blues\">'Victoria' Season 1 Finale Recap: Bye Bye Baby Blues\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/02/19/victoria-season-1-episode-6-recap-cmon-ride-the-train/\">'Victoria' Season 1, Episode 6 Recap: C'mon Ride the Train\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/02/12/pbs-victoria-season-1-episode-5-recap-ill-make-love-to-you/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 5 Recap: I’ll Make Love to You\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/02/05/pbs-victoria-season-1-episode-4-recap-wedding-bell-blues/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Wedding Bell Blues\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/29/pbs-victoria-season-1-episode-3-recap-youre-so-vain/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: You’re So Vain\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/22/victoria-season-1-episode-2-recap-all-the-single-ladies/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: All The Single Ladies\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/15/victoria-season-1-premiere-recap-bow-down/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1 Premiere Recap: Bow Down\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Did the end of 'Downton Abbey' leave a void in your spirit? 'Victoria' is here to fill it.",
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"description": "Did the end of 'Downton Abbey' leave a void in your spirit? 'Victoria' is here to fill it.",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cem>Hi there! You might remember me from \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey/\">Downton Abbey\u003c/a>\u003cem> or \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark/\">Poldark\u003c/a>\u003cem> recaps of yore. Since those shows wrapped, I've felt a void in my spirit that can only be filled by PBS-approved British imports. So I'm going to try falling in love again; this time, with a show called \u003c/em>Victoria\u003cem>. I hope you'll join me. Let's do this!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Pastel clouds greet a pleasant sunrise in the English countryside... but there's no time to appreciate that right now because there's a bunch of text on the screen! It's 1837, the year that daguerreotypes and \u003cem>Oliver Twist\u003c/em> became a thing. William IV is the king and apparently in some trouble. His niece Alexandrina is his heir.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, before we get any further, here are a few interesting things I found out about this William dude, after researching him for the past hour:\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>He joined the Royal Navy at 13. While stationed in North America, George Washington tried to kidnap him!\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>Because William IV was so far down the line of succession (he was the third son of King George III), he decided \u003cem>Ah, screw it!\u003c/em>, shacked up with an actress with a bad reputation and had ten \"illegitimate\" kids. Get it, Willie!\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>After the deaths of his father, both his older brothers, and his niece, he became an unexpected King at the ripe age of 64. Under his reign, slavery was abolished in nearly all of the British Empire and child labor was restricted. Huzzah for common decency!\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>In his final months, William gave a blistering speech at a banquet about how much he hoped he wouldn't croak before his niece was of age, so that her no-good, sneaky mother wouldn't get her hands on the powers of the crown. Queen Victoria -- then Alexandrina -- burst into tears from shock. But she still thought fondly of him because he was kind of right.\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>So that sets us up for what we're about to see. Back to the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A messenger arrives at Kensington Palace wearing a black armband. Our homeboy William IV is dead. Well, that was quick!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-20.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-57689\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-20.gif\" alt=\"giphy-20\" width=\"500\" height=\"324\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/The-African-Queen-GIF-1.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-57690\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/The-African-Queen-GIF-1.gif\" alt=\"the-african-queen-gif-1\" width=\"500\" height=\"363\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We hardly knew ye!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I'm more upset about his passing than anyone at this mansion is. Some dude named Sir John is basically like, \u003cem>Ugh, finally!\u003c/em> Alexandrina is so jazzed that she walks down a set of stairs WITHOUT HOLDING ONTO HER GOVERNESS.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After pretending to be bummed out about her dead uncle in front of the Archbishop for three seconds, she dances around the palace with her cute dog before heading to her room to blast the \"Bow down, b-tches!\" part of \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=geEMtwkBZVk\">that Beyoncé song\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Upstairs, Sir John and her mother are already trying to take control, starting with the Queen's name. They both agree Alexandrina is way too ethnic and that her middle name Victoria is super lame. Elizabeth will do. Or Ann.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alexandrina interrupts: \u003cem>Um, guys? Sorry to interrupt your little planning sesh, but I just saw the Archbishop alone and I intend to handle my own business forever and ever without your help. Cool? Oh, and I went down a staircase without assistance earlier.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-21.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-57705\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-21.gif\" alt=\"giphy-21\" width=\"500\" height=\"250\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sir John and co. are horrified by the idea of a grown woman having opinions and making her own decisions:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/IVVeY.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-57706\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/IVVeY.gif\" alt=\"ivvey\" width=\"360\" height=\"288\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In town, randoms are gossiping about how they've heard Alexandrina's tongue is too big for her mouth. Burn books were so quaint back then.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the palace, the governess tries to hold a lesson with Alexandrina, who replies with a \u003cem>Meh, I know enough. \u003c/em>The governess is bummed that she is now obsolete and must return to her native Germany, but she is quickly promoted to household dictator. The governess gleefully runs to the downstairs kitchen to be rude to all the servants for no reason.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later in the day, Lord Melbourne, the Prime Minister, arrives to kick it with Alexandrina. Sir John intercepts him and gives a speech about how Alexandrina is a homeschooled weirdo and needs him to be in charge of her affairs. Lord Melbourne pulls one of these:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/diss.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-37158\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/diss.gif\" alt=\"chappelle show diss gif\" width=\"400\" height=\"267\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After some small talk about dolls and ugly, pumpkin-headed suitors, Lord Melbourne brings up Sir John's attempts at seizing control. Alexandrina delivers a quick and strong \u003cem>NOPE!\u003c/em> Melbourne then slyly tries to pull a fast one: \u003cem>TOTALLY, but reading stuff can be quite hard. Your itty-bitty lady brain wouldn't like it. Let me do it! \u003c/em>Alexandrina responds by throwing a Betty Friedan book at his face and burning a bra.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, okay, she didn't exactly react like that, but she did firmly say no.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/picgifs-nope-400931.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-57716\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/picgifs-nope-400931.gif\" alt=\"picgifs-nope-400931\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, a bunch of Lords assemble to kiss the new Queen's hand. But before all the germ-spreading can commence, Alexandrina must give a speech. Her jealous uncle -- who, like the jealous uncle in \u003cem>The Lion King\u003c/em>, has a huge scar on his face -- interrupts to say she isn't talking loud enough. So she turns the volume and the content way up: \u003cem>Because you all are sexist and ageist as hell, you don't think I'm going to do well. Watch me.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mhihjztjut1qbh0eio1_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-57724\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mhihjztjut1qbh0eio1_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_mhihjztjut1qbh0eio1_500\" width=\"500\" height=\"238\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alexandrina goes to the balcony and proclaims herself Queen Victoria, a name change without which Prince may have never been referred to as \u003ca href=\"http://www.slate.com/blogs/the_eye/2016/04/21/the_story_behind_prince_s_unpronounceable_love_symbol_2.html\">an unpronounceable symbol\u003c/a>. It's a major moment, yet all I can focus on is the actress' horrible colored contacts. They make her look possessed!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58528\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM.png\" alt=\"screen-shot-2017-01-13-at-4-20-24-pm\" width=\"640\" height=\"399\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM.png 989w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-160x100.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-800x498.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-768x478.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-960x598.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-240x149.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-375x234.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.24-PM-520x324.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58529\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM.png\" alt=\"screen-shot-2017-01-13-at-4-19-57-pm\" width=\"640\" height=\"468\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM.png 872w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM-160x117.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM-800x584.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM-768x561.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM-240x175.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM-375x274.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.19.57-PM-520x380.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58527\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.43-PM.png\" alt=\"screen-shot-2017-01-13-at-4-20-43-pm\" width=\"575\" height=\"341\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.43-PM.png 575w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.43-PM-160x95.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.43-PM-240x142.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.43-PM-375x222.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-4.20.43-PM-520x308.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 575px) 100vw, 575px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyway, some time later, Governess Dictator hires a wide-eyed servant girl. The senior servants are royally pissed over not being consulted:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/QCMs8dUWZus'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/QCMs8dUWZus'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Upstairs, Victoria is hanging out with her only friends: her dolls and a portrait of her dead dad (#HomeschoolLife). Sir John bursts in, makes fun of her for still playing with dolls, and shuffles around important documents, in an attempt to convince Victoria that she didn't already fire him. When that doesn't work, he takes a more aggressive approach, by getting in Victoria's face and spitting: \"What can a girl like you -- \u003cem>unformed\u003c/em> -- possibly do to serve her country?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/she-came-that-way.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58530\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/she-came-that-way.gif\" alt=\"she-came-that-way\" width=\"245\" height=\"225\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Calling her \"unformed\" is one thing, but insulting her best doll friends? Oh, hell nah. Victoria sets him straight by yelling: \"IF I REQUIRE ADVICE, I WILL ASK FOR IT! Sir John, you have our permission to withdraw.\" That's polite royal talk for \"GTFO and TTYN, loser.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/17028425.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58531\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/17028425.gif\" alt=\"17028425\" width=\"500\" height=\"339\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria's mom's eye twitches, as Sir John limps backwards out of the room like a beaten puppy. Feminist Teen Queens: 1; Men Who Think Rocking Mutton Chops Makes Them Hot: 0.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Downstairs, Babyface Maid tries to mend some fancy gloves. Her boss tells her not to bother; the Queen never wears a pair more than once. Okay, Victoria seems chill and all, but I can see why head-chopping revolutions happen. The servants have their own way of sticking it to The Man though; they secretly sell the Queen's gloves, shoes, and other accessories, and pocket the money. Power to the ballsy, poor people! Get them coins!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-32.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58802\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-32.gif\" alt=\"giphy (32)\" width=\"500\" height=\"452\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, Victoria whines. \u003cem>Sir John is, like, sooo annoying! And mom's other friend, Flora, walked into my room without knocking!\u003c/em> If this were a century or two earlier, Victoria would simply have them both killed, but it's the 19th century, so she decides to just move to a bigger mansion -- the recently-completed Buckingham Palace -- where she can keep them sequestered in whichever wing gets the least natural light. All is fair in love and real estate.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And now, it's time for a montage of everyone we've met so far running around the new digs, freaking out over all the chandeliers, and chanting, \"Started from the bottom, now we're here!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Babyface Maid spots Victoria for the first time and is so dumbfounded that she blurts out this dumb statement: \"She is small, but she ain't no midget.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58801\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/short.gif\" alt=\"short\" width=\"470\" height=\"188\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Moments later, the Prime Minister eases Victoria's worries that no one takes her seriously because of her height by declaring: \"Anyone who dares comment on your stature should be sent straight to the Tower!\" (Sayonara, Babyface!) Victoria rewards him for waging a war against heightists -- and for being sort of sexy, if you squint a little -- by giving him a cute nickname -- Lord M -- and allowing him to be her Private Secretary.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_n9yz2e80Qt1tp719lo1_r1_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58800\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_n9yz2e80Qt1tp719lo1_r1_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_n9yz2e80Qt1tp719lo1_r1_500\" width=\"500\" height=\"261\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere, Victoria's mom is really bummed that she and her friends have been put in the North Wing, far away from Victoria's room in the South Wing (#FirstWorldProblems). Sir John takes the opportunity to play a few more B-sides from his Victoria-is-a-stupid-shrimpy-loser broken record, only to be interrupted by the Queen herself. Sir John pounces and tries to make Victoria pick her maids-of-honor on the spot. Victoria gives him the silent treatment and a look that says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/anigif_enhanced-4773-1430938663-26.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-36234\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/anigif_enhanced-4773-1430938663-26.gif\" alt=\"get off my jock gif bethenny\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Not taking the hint, Flora pulls out a list of potential girls and ensures that none of them are tall whores. Victoria doubles down on her request for everyone to get off her jock:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/i-just-want-you-off-my-jock-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58681\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/i-just-want-you-off-my-jock-gif.gif\" alt=\"i-just-want-you-off-my-jock-gif\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that day, Victoria tells Babyface Maid she wants to change things up with an \u003cem>au courant\u003c/em> hairstyle. Babyface Maid doesn't know what\u003cem> au courant\u003c/em> means, despite telling all the servants earlier that she has studied French. So she's a liar \u003cem>and\u003c/em> hates short people. Got it. They end up going with braids that go under and around the ears, which soon became the 19th century version of \u003ca href=\"http://parade.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/Jennifer-Aniston-The-Rachel-Hairstyle-ftr.jpg\">The Rachel\u003c/a>™.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few days later, Flora continues to pester Victoria. Apparently, Victoria accidentally turned her back on some troops.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Victoria:\u003c/strong> \"No one mentioned this to me.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Flora:\u003c/strong> \"I assure you, they noticed, but no one likes to correct their monarch, ma'am.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Victoria:\u003c/strong> \"Except for you, evidently.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-24.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58689\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-24.gif\" alt=\"giphy-24\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Elsewhere in the palace, Governess Dictator is yelling at a servant for wasting too much money on beeswax candles. She doesn't know the help is selling them off, along with all the Queen's other once-used belongings, but something tells me she will soon and the reckoning will be glorious.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Days later, Victoria and Lord M are trotting around on horses and chatting about how everyone thinks they're bumping uglies. Victoria asks if the reason he's single is because he's still clinically depressed about his wife running away with Lord Byron and then dying (yes, that \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lord_Byron\">Lord Byron\u003c/a>!). Lord M is like, \u003cem>Um, yeah. Thanks for bringing that up.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day is the Royal Coronation Ball. Everyone who's anyone is in attendance... except for Lord M, who is crying in the dark at his house, while smelling a lock of hair. Yikes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before heading into the ballroom, Sir John, who's still allowed to live in the palace for some reason, reminds Victoria to not get too wasted or do anything slutty. Victoria is like:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-25.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58697\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-25.gif\" alt=\"giphy-25\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It wouldn't be a ball without a few scandals:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Scandal #1:\u003c/strong> The servants swapped out all the beeswax candles for cheap tallow candles, which are dripping wax all over the guests.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Scandal #2:\u003c/strong> \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alexander_II_of_Russia\">Alexander II\u003c/a>, the son of the Russian Emperor, gets a bit too handsy with Victoria, while dancing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The latter is broken up, thanks to Lord M (who dried his tears and showed up, after all). Victoria deals with being groped by chugging lots of champagne and basically confessing her love for Lord M: \"You dance so well. I wish I could dance with you every night.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Lick_your_lips.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58698\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Lick_your_lips.gif\" alt=\"lick_your_lips\" width=\"500\" height=\"187\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A little later, Governess Dictator pulls Victoria aside to Wikileak \u003cstrong>Scandal #3:\u003c/strong> Flora appears to be pregnant! And the baby is probably Sir John's!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria goes and yells at Sir John, who then calls her a drunk. Victoria's measured reply:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/3d34e403-b4c9-45bd-8c93-91efec18a2a8.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58699\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/3d34e403-b4c9-45bd-8c93-91efec18a2a8.gif\" alt=\"3d34e403-b4c9-45bd-8c93-91efec18a2a8\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After some sloppy 19th century twerking, Flora interrupts Victoria on the dance floor to relay a message. The music stops just in time for everyone to hear Victoria yell, \"Mama sent \u003cem>you\u003c/em> to tell \u003cem>me\u003c/em> what to do??\" Lord M quickly escorts Victoria out and makes her go to bed before she pukes on everyone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The following day, Victoria somehow doesn't have a raging hangover. She informs her mom about Flora's scandalous pregnancy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/What-Happens-When-You-Deliver-Large-Baby.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58707\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/What-Happens-When-You-Deliver-Large-Baby.gif\" alt=\"what-happens-when-you-deliver-large-baby\" width=\"400\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Flora and Sir John commiserate over not being invited to the Coronation ceremony and hating Victoria's guts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-26.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58708\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-26.gif\" alt=\"giphy-26\" width=\"500\" height=\"260\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While Victoria is being coronated, she has ordered that Flora undergo a medical examination to prove to everyone that she's a pregnant floozy. This plan backfires when the doctors conclude Flora is \u003cem>virgo intacta\u003c/em> and actually has a huge tumor growing inside of her.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Bad-This-is-bad-My-bad-Oops-GIF.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58716\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Bad-This-is-bad-My-bad-Oops-GIF.gif\" alt=\"bad-this-is-bad-my-bad-oops-gif\" width=\"468\" height=\"263\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria's evil uncle Scar sees an opportunity. He leaks the scandalous story of the Queen forcing a humiliating examination upon an innocent dying woman and calls for the powers of the crown to be turned over to him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Flora takes a turn for the worst and Victoria is pressured to hang out at her deathbed. This proves to be quite awkward and goes a little something like this:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Flora:\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/baby-box-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58726\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/baby-box-gif.gif\" alt=\"baby-box-gif\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Victoria:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Ummm, hiiiii. Being sick totally sucks. Want me to send you some peaches? They'll fix you right up!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Flora: \u003c/strong>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-20-1.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58717\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-20-1.gif\" alt=\"giphy-20\" width=\"400\" height=\"223\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Victoria:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Anyway, that whole exam thing was my bad. We cool?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Flora:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>You're going to hell. Now leave me alone so I can die.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Victoria:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_m15vqg8mRd1r5aheq.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58725\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_m15vqg8mRd1r5aheq.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_m15vqg8mRd1r5aheq\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The following day, Governess Dictator finds out about the glove-selling ring. She correctly accuses the lead maid, Mrs. Jenkins, but Babyface Maid confesses because Jesus would have also taken the blame for a random misdemeanor or something. Governess Dictator tells Victoria, who responds:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/wvr.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58728\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/wvr.gif\" alt=\"wvr\" width=\"500\" height=\"337\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/90081_idgaf-i-dont-care-christina-aguilera-nobody-cares.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58727\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/90081_idgaf-i-dont-care-christina-aguilera-nobody-cares.gif\" alt=\"90081_idgaf-i-dont-care-christina-aguilera-nobody-cares\" width=\"500\" height=\"351\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that day, Victoria's mom bursts in crying. Flora is dead. And she believes Victoria \"drove her to her grave.\" Victoria somehow manages to make it all about her: \u003cem>Sorry about your dead friend and all, but Sir John always makes fun of my height and you never defend me! Leave me alone!!!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Lord M finds Victoria sitting at a piano, having a full-blown anxiety attack about how everyone thinks she killed a virgin. He confesses that he often wishes he was dead because his young son died some years ago, but that he pretends to be okay with this whole being alive thing, and she should too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next time Victoria is in front of the public, they yell about her being a virgin murderer, but she takes Lord M's advice and cooly pretends to be OK with being alive.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some time passes. Uncle Scar continues to travel around, talking smack about his niece and encouraging rumors that something inappropriate is going on between her and Lord M. He selflessly offers to take control of things, if needed.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-28.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58750\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-28.gif\" alt=\"giphy (28)\" width=\"533\" height=\"300\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria finds out slavery is still a thing in the Caribbean. She's like, \u003cem>Oh, I'll just fix that then\u003c/em>. Lord M is like, \u003cem>Ha ha ha. We can't just be decent human beings, silly. We have to let a bunch of white privileged men debate the economic losses associated with letting other human beings have basic rights first.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sir John bursts in and demands that Victoria give her mother the title of Queen Mother. Victoria is like:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/310bd726b77ad245d304a77f78b459f7.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58751\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/310bd726b77ad245d304a77f78b459f7.gif\" alt=\"310bd726b77ad245d304a77f78b459f7\" width=\"499\" height=\"225\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Downstairs, Governess Dictator orders men to install gas lighting. Try selling candles now, riff-raff! The workers open up a wall and AN AVALANCHE OF RATS FALLS OUT. THEY SCURRY ALL OVER THE KITCHEN. AHHHHH!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-29.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58754\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-29.gif\" alt=\"giphy (29)\" width=\"500\" height=\"273\">\u003c/a>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/scared02.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58753\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/scared02.gif\" alt=\"scared02\" width=\"500\" height=\"342\">\u003c/a>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-30.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58752\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/giphy-30.gif\" alt=\"giphy (30)\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back upstairs, the results of the slavery vote are in. By six votes, the Parliament decided enslaving people is bad!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tenor.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58769\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tenor.gif\" alt=\"tenor\" width=\"498\" height=\"243\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But Lord M has to step down and stop talking to Victoria because his party has been weakened.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/iooo.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58772\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/iooo.gif\" alt=\"iooo\" width=\"251\" height=\"251\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A wailing Victoria goes outside in the rain and uses her closed umbrella to attack hedges.\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/why.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58770\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/why.gif\" alt=\"why\" width=\"245\" height=\"160\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Eventually, she calms down and interviews a potential replacement for the Prime Minister, the Duke of Wellington. He turns the position down because he's old and has been there, done that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/giphy-8.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19744\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/giphy-8.gif\" alt=\"honey boo boo no thank you gif\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a> \u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/tumblr_n2hhznE3Ub1rfduvxo1_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19743\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/tumblr_n2hhznE3Ub1rfduvxo1_250.gif\" alt=\"honey boo boo too much gif\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a> \u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/tumblr_n2dkpmzid11rfduvxo1_250.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19742\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/tumblr_n2dkpmzid11rfduvxo1_250.gif\" alt=\"honey boo boo bye gif\" width=\"245\" height=\"200\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Downstairs, the lead maid turns on the brand new gas line and takes her sweet time finding a flame. Her hand is consumed by a fireball. Babyface Maid runs to fetch some butter for the burn, but gets distracted by a hot chef, who says, \"You can have butter, if you like, but I can give you something better.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/oprah-face.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58780\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/oprah-face.gif\" alt=\"oprah-face\" width=\"415\" height=\"212\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He tells her to close her eyes so he can show her \"a surprise.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And then shows her his...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/732978471.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58781\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/732978471.gif\" alt=\"732978471\" width=\"300\" height=\"225\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...freezer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/1478238113-oprah-winfrey-notimpressed.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58782\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/1478238113-oprah-winfrey-notimpressed.gif\" alt=\"1478238113-oprah-winfrey-notimpressed\" width=\"300\" height=\"171\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back upstairs, Victoria is mad about a new coin that makes her look like she has a double chin. Her problems are so relatable.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Another possible candidate for the Prime Minister position by the name of Robert Peel shows up. He says the coin looks just like her. Uh oh! He then mansplains how the British government works. Double uh oh! Then he demands that she replace her ladies with women from his political party. Triple uh oh! Victoria isn't having any of it:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/gtfo13.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58783\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/gtfo13.gif\" alt=\"gtfo13\" width=\"375\" height=\"247\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Uncle Scar is doing lines of 19th century coke, when Sir John comes in. They plot to convince everyone that Victoria is insane like her grandfather and unfit to rule.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Victoria keeps trying to convince Lord M to get over himself and agree to stay Prime Minister. Lord M screams the lyrics to Taylor Swift's \"We Are Never Ever Ever Getting Back Together.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/JmW19.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58784\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/JmW19.gif\" alt=\"JmW19\" width=\"500\" height=\"256\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, Victoria can't sleep and decides to sit in front of a portrait of her insane grandfather. Her mother comes to hang out in a chic toilet paper headpiece.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM.png\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-58787\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM.png\" alt=\"Screen Shot 2017-01-15 at 1.06.29 AM\" width=\"300\" height=\"401\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM.png 701w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM-160x214.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM-240x321.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM-375x501.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Screen-Shot-2017-01-15-at-1.06.29-AM-520x695.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria's mom assures her that she won't let anyone take away her power. One way to respond is for Victoria to be chill for once and just hug her mom and say \"Thanks.\" Instead, she gives her mom a hard time for hanging out with Sir John and never protecting her in the past. Yeesh. At least she didn't bring up her \u003cem>I'm short and super sad about it\u003c/em> hang-up again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day is Victoria's birthday. The hot chef presents his impressive multi-tiered cake, topped with a likeness of the Queen and her cute dog. Some kids sing \"God Save the Queen\" and Victoria talks through it. Sir John tries to give Victoria a present and she pretends he's not there. Everyone almost dies of awkwardness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Victoria opens a gift from Lord M. Will it be a love letter? A lock of his hair? A nude photo?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Excited-Baby-Opening-Present.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58796\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Excited-Baby-Opening-Present.gif\" alt=\"Excited-Baby-Opening-Present\" width=\"332\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's a telescope.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/waqrg59iicwip04mmswz.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58797\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/waqrg59iicwip04mmswz.gif\" alt=\"waqrg59iicwip04mmswz\" width=\"434\" height=\"261\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Next up: her mother's gift.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Excited-Baby-Opening-Present.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58796\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Excited-Baby-Opening-Present.gif\" alt=\"Excited-Baby-Opening-Present\" width=\"332\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's a copy of \u003cem>King Lear\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/dsppntmnt.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58798\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/dsppntmnt.gif\" alt=\"dsppntmnt\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>With a very rude passage underlined: \"How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/How-Rude-Stephanie-Full-House.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58899\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/How-Rude-Stephanie-Full-House.gif\" alt=\"How-Rude-Stephanie-Full-House\" width=\"320\" height=\"256\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before Victoria can even react, RATS ARE ALL OVER HER CAKE! Victoria understandably loses her sh-t.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cut to Uncle Scar's cocaine den. He's sniffing and spinning the story with Sir John's help. She was in hysterics! Maybe she hallucinated the rats! Muahaha!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Victoria tries to unveil her royal painting by pulling a tarp off of it. She can't manage it because she has poor upper body strength and/or is not used to doing very basic things like pulling. Lord M swoops in to help and casually says, \u003cem>Oh, hey, I'll be your Prime Minister again. Sorry about yelling Taylor Swift breakup lyrics in your face for the past couple of weeks. \u003c/em>Is he serious? All that running around for nothing? If it wasn't for his wife running off and his kid dying, I might hold a grudge, but I'll just move on.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a dark alley, some random tries to get Babyface Maid to sell herself and won't take no for an answer. Thankfully, the hot cook swoops in. Turns out he's been stalking her, but in the cute way. He reveals that he recognizes her from some former house of ill repute, but he doesn't care. He just wants to date. Aww (I think)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the palace, Lord M and Victoria gaze longingly across a room at each other. Some dude tells Lord M that this googly-eyed business won't last for long, as Victoria will soon wed. But Lord M knows that marriage doesn't mean anything. Just ask Lord Byron.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: Sir John. \u003c/strong>The uncle has a scar over his eye, which means he has no choice but to be evil. What's this guy's excuse?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: William IV. \u003c/strong>I would totally watch a show about him and his 10 \"illegitimate\" children.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong> \u003cstrong>Hot Chef. \u003c/strong>That cake was impressive. And so is his face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>SILVER: \u003cstrong>Flora. \u003c/strong>\u003c/strong>If anyone has earned the right to say \"\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9l7S1hnRPF0\">That was way harsh, Tai,\u003c/a>\" it's this virgin who can't drive.\u003cstrong> \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>GOLD: Victoria. \u003c/strong>Duh.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Until next week! If you miss me, \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/author/ehapsis/\">read some of my other work \u003c/a>or \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">follow me on Twitter @xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>More recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108303/victoria-season-3-finale-recap-matchmaker-matchmaker\">'Victoria' Season 3 Finale Recap: Matchmaker, Matchmaker\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108301/victoria-season-3-episode-7-recap-california-love\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 7 Recap: California Love\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108299/victoria-season-3-episode-6-recap-love-on-the-brain\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 6 Recap: Love on the Brain\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108293/victoria-season-3-episode-5-recap-on-the-road-again\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 5 Recap: On The Road Again\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108291/victoria-season-3-episode-4-recap-ill-be-missing-you\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 4 Recap: I'll Be Missing You\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108289/victoria-season-3-episode-3-recap-la-isla-bonita\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 3 Recap: La Isla Bonita\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108287/victoria-season-3-episode-2-recap-the-guns-of-brixton\">'Victoria' Season 3 Episode 2 Recap: The Guns of Brixton\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/108284/victoria-season-3-premiere-recap-god-save-the-queen\">'Victoria' Season 3 Premiere Recap: God Save The Queen\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97779/victoria-season-2-finale-recap-its-a-hard-knock-life\">'Victoria' Season 2 Finale Recap: It's a Hard-Knock Life\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97777/victoria-season-2-episode-6-recap-somewhere-over-the-rainbow\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 6 Recap: Somewhere Over The Rainbow\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97775/victoria-season-2-episode-5-recap-lost-and-found\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 5 Recap: Lost and Found\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97773/victoria-season-2-episode-4-recap-people-are-people\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 4 Recap: People Are People\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97771/victoria-season-2-episode-3-recap-daddy-issues\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 3 Recap: Daddy Issues\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97769/victoria-season-2-episode-2-recap-puppy-love\">'Victoria' Season 2 Episode 2 Recap: Puppy Love\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/97767/victoria-season-2-premiere-recap-baby-its-cold-outside\">'Victoria' Season 2 Premiere Recap: Baby It's Cold Outside\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/56546/victoria-season-1-finale-recap-bye-bye-baby-blues\">'Victoria' Season 1 Finale Recap: Bye Bye Baby Blues\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/02/19/victoria-season-1-episode-6-recap-cmon-ride-the-train/\">'Victoria' Season 1, Episode 6 Recap: C'mon Ride the Train\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/02/12/pbs-victoria-season-1-episode-5-recap-ill-make-love-to-you/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 5 Recap: I’ll Make Love to You\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/02/05/pbs-victoria-season-1-episode-4-recap-wedding-bell-blues/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 4 Recap: Wedding Bell Blues\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/29/pbs-victoria-season-1-episode-3-recap-youre-so-vain/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 3 Recap: You’re So Vain\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2017/01/22/victoria-season-1-episode-2-recap-all-the-single-ladies/\">‘Victoria’ Season 1, Episode 2 Recap: All The Single Ladies\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"disqusTitle": "Outraged By Joseph Fiennes Playing Michael Jackson? TV Producers Were Banking On It",
"title": "Outraged By Joseph Fiennes Playing Michael Jackson? TV Producers Were Banking On It",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>For an entire year now, widespread outrage has been bubbling up online over the decision to cast Joseph Fiennes -- a man most of us associate with English period dramas, like his most famous film, \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0138097/?ref_=nm_flmg_act_33\">Shakespeare in Love\u003c/a>\u003c/em> -- as Michael Jackson in an upcoming TV show.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Last January, when very valid accusations of whitewashing first hit social media, Fiennes told \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.etonline.com/news/180946_joseph_fiennes_shocked_he_was_cast_to_portray_michael_jackson/\">Entertainment Tonight\u003c/a>\u003c/em>: \"I'm a white, middle-class guy from London. I’m as shocked as you may be,\" followed by a statement that Jackson \"was probably closer to my color than his original color\" because of a \"pigmentation issue.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This week, as photos emerged of what Fiennes looks like in full MJ make-up, the anger only increased from bloggers and fans, culminating in a \u003ca href=\"http://www.thepetitionsite.com/712/071/341/\">petition to boycott\u003c/a> the show. Michael's daughter, \u003ca href=\"http://jezebel.com/paris-jackson-is-not-happy-about-joseph-fiennes-s-portr-1791112588?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow\">Paris, \u003c/a>also weighed in: \"I’m so incredibly offended by it, as i’m sure plenty of people are as well, and it honestly makes me want to vomit. It angers me to see how obviously intentional it was for them to be this insulting.\" Michael's nephew, Taj, also referred to it as \"\u003ca href=\"http://www.eonline.com/news/821604/michael-jackson-s-nephew-taj-jackson-calls-joseph-fiennes-casting-blatant-disrespect\">blatant disrespect.\u003c/a>\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Faced with this image, who could possibly blame them?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-58380\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-800x444.png\" alt=\"michael\" width=\"800\" height=\"444\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-800x444.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-768x427.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-1020x567.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-1920x1067.png 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-1180x656.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-960x533.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-672x372.png 672w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-1038x576.png 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-240x133.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-375x208.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-520x289.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On closer inspection, however, it becomes clear that, if the producers hadn't opted to cast a white Englishman in the role of Michael Jackson, it's probable that no one in America would have ever even heard about \"\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt5320014/?ref_=nm_flmg_act_2\">Elizabeth, Michael and Marlon\u003c/a>.\" Not only is this thing not a biopic, it's not even a movie. \"Elizabeth, Michael and Marlon\" is just an episode of a surrealist television series, titled \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.sky.com/watch/channel/sky-arts/urban-myths\">Urban Myths\u003c/a>\u003c/em>, that will be aired on a \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sky_Arts\">relatively obscure\u003c/a> British cable channel named \u003ca href=\"https://www.sky.com/watch/channel/sky-arts\">Sky Arts\u003c/a>. (\u003cstrong>Update:\u003c/strong> Due to the controversy, the episode has \u003ca href=\"https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2017/jan/13/sky-pulls-broadcast-of-show-that-cast-white-actor-as-michael-jackson-joseph-fiennes-urban-myths\">now been pulled\u003c/a>.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As such, it's hard to feel like this particularly offensive casting decision was made for any reason other than to specifically draw an inflated amount of attention to this bizarre TV show. The fact that Sky Arts gave us a full 12 months to get annoyed about it suggests much calculation on the channel's part.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To give you some idea of what we're dealing with, here's the full \u003cem>Urban Myths\u003c/em> trailer, complete with jaunty please-don't-take-this-seriously music and an appearance by \u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm3701064/?ref_=nv_sr_1\">Iwan Rheon\u003c/a> (Ramsay Bolton from \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>) playing -- yes -- Adolf Hitler.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c!-- iframe plugin v.4.3 wordpress.org/plugins/iframe/ -->\u003cbr>\n\u003ciframe src=\"//players.brightcove.net/769341148/E1zVmpNYx_default/index.html?videoId=5277428302001\" frameborder=\"0\" width=\"100%\" height=\"500\" scrolling=\"yes\" class=\"iframe-class\">\u003c/iframe>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To put it bluntly, this is nothing that any of us should be paying attention to.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Whitewashing roles and minimizing options for actors of color is an ongoing problem on far bigger stages than this, as demonstrated by \u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0158632/?ref_=fn_al_nm_1\">Margaret Cho\u003c/a>’s recent \u003ca href=\"http://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2016/12/tilda-swinton-margaret-cho-emails\">spat\u003c/a> with \u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0842770/?ref_=tt_cl_t6\">Tilda Swinton\u003c/a> over the latter portraying The Ancient One -- a role usually inhabited by an Asian male -- in \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1211837/?ref_=nm_flmg_act_5\">Doctor Strange\u003c/a>\u003c/em>. Remember when Angelina Jolie played Marianne Pearl, a real-life woman of Afro-Cuban descent, in \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0829459/?ref_=nv_sr_1\">A Mighty Heart\u003c/a>\u003c/em>? How about in 2015 when Juliette Binoche portrayed a Chilean woman in \u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2006295/?ref_=nv_sr_1\">\u003cem>The 33\u003c/em>\u003c/a>? Or in 2014 when Christian Bale \u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1528100/?ref_=nv_sr_1\">played Moses\u003c/a>, and 2010 when Jake Gyllenhaal was the leading man in a movie called \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0473075/?ref_=nv_sr_3\">The Prince of Persia\u003c/a>\u003c/em>? How about when Liam Neeson was Ra’s Al Ghul, a character of Arabian descent, in \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1345836/?ref_=nv_sr_1\">The Dark Knight Rises\u003c/a>\u003c/em>? We could drag this all the way back to Mickey Rooney's portrayal of a Japanese immigrant in \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0054698/?ref_=nv_sr_1\">Breakfast at Tiffany's\u003c/a>\u003c/em>, but, frankly, we'd be here all day.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Truthfully, a large swath of the outrage directed at \u003cem>Urban Myths\u003c/em> probably has more to do with the present-day culturally pervasive idea that Michael Jackson must be protected and held sacred at all costs than it does with the racist casting issue.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jackson was the butt of cruel jokes throughout his career, but since his premature death from a Propofol overdose in 2009, there is an underlying guilt in the public consciousness that, just perhaps, we could've gone a little easier on poor, perpetually vulnerable Michael Jackson. (This notion persists, despite Jackson's ex-wife Lisa Marie Presley asserting in a prominent \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrVLbP8uyEE\">2003 interview\u003c/a> that \"he has some idea about how he should represent himself in public… which is sort of the meek, victim-y, quiet thing that he does, which is not anything like how he really is.\")\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Of course, Jackson had unshakeable defenders during his lifetime -- like those fans that cheered him on as he (inappropriately) climbed on top of a car outside the courthouse, before the first day of his \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trial_of_Michael_Jackson\">2005 child molestation trial\u003c/a> -- but the truth is, most of us laughed at his expense at some point during his strange and spectacular life, and we just don't feel okay about doing it after his death.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After Jackson's friend Princess Diana died tragically in a car accident in 1997, pursued relentlessly by paparazzi, theories emerged that the gigantic public outpouring of grief that followed in the U.K. was rooted in \u003ca href=\"http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1584072/Losing-Princess-Diana-Where-the-guilt-lies.html\">guilt\u003c/a> that the public's appetite for Diana-based gossip had somehow contributed to her death. Similarly, while racism is definitely an issue when it comes to Fiennes' portrayal of Jackson in \u003cem>Urban Myths\u003c/em>, it's possible that this outcry is particularly inflamed because every time we see Jackson's surgery-ravaged face, we feel partially responsible for it. When a third party is mimicking it, it only entrenches the sensation.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Urban Myths\u003c/em>’ decision to cast a white British man as Michael Jackson was undoubtedly a cynical one, designed to garner maximum publicity. Our willingness to respond with such outrage isn't just predictable, it also somehow misses the bigger picture.\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Michael Jackson's daughter, Paris, on the depiction: \"It angers me to see how obviously intentional it was for them to be this insulting.\"",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>For an entire year now, widespread outrage has been bubbling up online over the decision to cast Joseph Fiennes -- a man most of us associate with English period dramas, like his most famous film, \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0138097/?ref_=nm_flmg_act_33\">Shakespeare in Love\u003c/a>\u003c/em> -- as Michael Jackson in an upcoming TV show.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Last January, when very valid accusations of whitewashing first hit social media, Fiennes told \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.etonline.com/news/180946_joseph_fiennes_shocked_he_was_cast_to_portray_michael_jackson/\">Entertainment Tonight\u003c/a>\u003c/em>: \"I'm a white, middle-class guy from London. I’m as shocked as you may be,\" followed by a statement that Jackson \"was probably closer to my color than his original color\" because of a \"pigmentation issue.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This week, as photos emerged of what Fiennes looks like in full MJ make-up, the anger only increased from bloggers and fans, culminating in a \u003ca href=\"http://www.thepetitionsite.com/712/071/341/\">petition to boycott\u003c/a> the show. Michael's daughter, \u003ca href=\"http://jezebel.com/paris-jackson-is-not-happy-about-joseph-fiennes-s-portr-1791112588?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow\">Paris, \u003c/a>also weighed in: \"I’m so incredibly offended by it, as i’m sure plenty of people are as well, and it honestly makes me want to vomit. It angers me to see how obviously intentional it was for them to be this insulting.\" Michael's nephew, Taj, also referred to it as \"\u003ca href=\"http://www.eonline.com/news/821604/michael-jackson-s-nephew-taj-jackson-calls-joseph-fiennes-casting-blatant-disrespect\">blatant disrespect.\u003c/a>\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Faced with this image, who could possibly blame them?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-58380\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-800x444.png\" alt=\"michael\" width=\"800\" height=\"444\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-800x444.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-768x427.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-1020x567.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-1920x1067.png 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-1180x656.png 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-960x533.png 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-672x372.png 672w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-1038x576.png 1038w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-240x133.png 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-375x208.png 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Michael-520x289.png 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On closer inspection, however, it becomes clear that, if the producers hadn't opted to cast a white Englishman in the role of Michael Jackson, it's probable that no one in America would have ever even heard about \"\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt5320014/?ref_=nm_flmg_act_2\">Elizabeth, Michael and Marlon\u003c/a>.\" Not only is this thing not a biopic, it's not even a movie. \"Elizabeth, Michael and Marlon\" is just an episode of a surrealist television series, titled \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.sky.com/watch/channel/sky-arts/urban-myths\">Urban Myths\u003c/a>\u003c/em>, that will be aired on a \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sky_Arts\">relatively obscure\u003c/a> British cable channel named \u003ca href=\"https://www.sky.com/watch/channel/sky-arts\">Sky Arts\u003c/a>. (\u003cstrong>Update:\u003c/strong> Due to the controversy, the episode has \u003ca href=\"https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2017/jan/13/sky-pulls-broadcast-of-show-that-cast-white-actor-as-michael-jackson-joseph-fiennes-urban-myths\">now been pulled\u003c/a>.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As such, it's hard to feel like this particularly offensive casting decision was made for any reason other than to specifically draw an inflated amount of attention to this bizarre TV show. The fact that Sky Arts gave us a full 12 months to get annoyed about it suggests much calculation on the channel's part.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To give you some idea of what we're dealing with, here's the full \u003cem>Urban Myths\u003c/em> trailer, complete with jaunty please-don't-take-this-seriously music and an appearance by \u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm3701064/?ref_=nv_sr_1\">Iwan Rheon\u003c/a> (Ramsay Bolton from \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>) playing -- yes -- Adolf Hitler.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c!-- iframe plugin v.4.3 wordpress.org/plugins/iframe/ -->\u003cbr>\n\u003ciframe src=\"//players.brightcove.net/769341148/E1zVmpNYx_default/index.html?videoId=5277428302001\" frameborder=\"0\" width=\"100%\" height=\"500\" scrolling=\"yes\" class=\"iframe-class\">\u003c/iframe>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To put it bluntly, this is nothing that any of us should be paying attention to.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Whitewashing roles and minimizing options for actors of color is an ongoing problem on far bigger stages than this, as demonstrated by \u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0158632/?ref_=fn_al_nm_1\">Margaret Cho\u003c/a>’s recent \u003ca href=\"http://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2016/12/tilda-swinton-margaret-cho-emails\">spat\u003c/a> with \u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0842770/?ref_=tt_cl_t6\">Tilda Swinton\u003c/a> over the latter portraying The Ancient One -- a role usually inhabited by an Asian male -- in \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1211837/?ref_=nm_flmg_act_5\">Doctor Strange\u003c/a>\u003c/em>. Remember when Angelina Jolie played Marianne Pearl, a real-life woman of Afro-Cuban descent, in \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0829459/?ref_=nv_sr_1\">A Mighty Heart\u003c/a>\u003c/em>? How about in 2015 when Juliette Binoche portrayed a Chilean woman in \u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2006295/?ref_=nv_sr_1\">\u003cem>The 33\u003c/em>\u003c/a>? Or in 2014 when Christian Bale \u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1528100/?ref_=nv_sr_1\">played Moses\u003c/a>, and 2010 when Jake Gyllenhaal was the leading man in a movie called \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0473075/?ref_=nv_sr_3\">The Prince of Persia\u003c/a>\u003c/em>? How about when Liam Neeson was Ra’s Al Ghul, a character of Arabian descent, in \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1345836/?ref_=nv_sr_1\">The Dark Knight Rises\u003c/a>\u003c/em>? We could drag this all the way back to Mickey Rooney's portrayal of a Japanese immigrant in \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0054698/?ref_=nv_sr_1\">Breakfast at Tiffany's\u003c/a>\u003c/em>, but, frankly, we'd be here all day.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Truthfully, a large swath of the outrage directed at \u003cem>Urban Myths\u003c/em> probably has more to do with the present-day culturally pervasive idea that Michael Jackson must be protected and held sacred at all costs than it does with the racist casting issue.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jackson was the butt of cruel jokes throughout his career, but since his premature death from a Propofol overdose in 2009, there is an underlying guilt in the public consciousness that, just perhaps, we could've gone a little easier on poor, perpetually vulnerable Michael Jackson. (This notion persists, despite Jackson's ex-wife Lisa Marie Presley asserting in a prominent \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrVLbP8uyEE\">2003 interview\u003c/a> that \"he has some idea about how he should represent himself in public… which is sort of the meek, victim-y, quiet thing that he does, which is not anything like how he really is.\")\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Of course, Jackson had unshakeable defenders during his lifetime -- like those fans that cheered him on as he (inappropriately) climbed on top of a car outside the courthouse, before the first day of his \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trial_of_Michael_Jackson\">2005 child molestation trial\u003c/a> -- but the truth is, most of us laughed at his expense at some point during his strange and spectacular life, and we just don't feel okay about doing it after his death.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After Jackson's friend Princess Diana died tragically in a car accident in 1997, pursued relentlessly by paparazzi, theories emerged that the gigantic public outpouring of grief that followed in the U.K. was rooted in \u003ca href=\"http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1584072/Losing-Princess-Diana-Where-the-guilt-lies.html\">guilt\u003c/a> that the public's appetite for Diana-based gossip had somehow contributed to her death. Similarly, while racism is definitely an issue when it comes to Fiennes' portrayal of Jackson in \u003cem>Urban Myths\u003c/em>, it's possible that this outcry is particularly inflamed because every time we see Jackson's surgery-ravaged face, we feel partially responsible for it. When a third party is mimicking it, it only entrenches the sensation.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Urban Myths\u003c/em>’ decision to cast a white British man as Michael Jackson was undoubtedly a cynical one, designed to garner maximum publicity. Our willingness to respond with such outrage isn't just predictable, it also somehow misses the bigger picture.\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"title": "The Most Amusing & Terrifying Predictions Nikki, Psychic to the Stars, Made for 2017",
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"content": "\u003cp>\u003cem>This piece was inspired by an episode of \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">The Cooler\u003c/a>, KQED’s weekly pop culture podcast. Give it a listen!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c!-- iframe plugin v.4.3 wordpress.org/plugins/iframe/ -->\u003cbr>\n\u003ciframe width=\"100%\" height=\"166\" scrolling=\"no\" frameborder=\"no\" src=\"https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/302316901&color=ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false\" class=\"iframe-class\">\u003c/iframe>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Uncertainty has been the only thing certain in recent months. Checking to see if a headline is real or a joke from \u003cem>The Onion\u003c/em> has become a daily practice. Gone are the days when we could correctly assume how things might turn out. Or are they?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nikki, self-proclaimed Psychic to the Stars, believes she already knows what's coming. Last year, \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/01/14/the-10-most-amusing-predictions-nikki-psychic-to-the-stars-made-for-2016/\">I shared 10 of her most amusing predictions\u003c/a>. They included:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A new head at Mt. Rushmore:\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_58315\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 768px\">\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"wp-image-58315 size-full\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432.jpg\" alt=\"beyonce-rushmore-768x432\" width=\"768\" height=\"432\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432-240x135.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432-375x211.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432-520x293.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 768px) 100vw, 768px\">\u003c/a>\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">In Bey We Trust. (Photo: Emmanuel Hapsis)\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>A monkey breaking into the White House:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/anigif_enhanced-buzz-25328-1384182042-35.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58317\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/anigif_enhanced-buzz-25328-1384182042-35.gif\" alt=\"anigif_enhanced-buzz-25328-1384182042-35\" width=\"477\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Kim and Kanye having a baby named Kristal South:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/kimk-1415673876.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58316\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/kimk-1415673876.gif\" alt=\"kimk-1415673876\" width=\"460\" height=\"262\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And a pet parrot killing a movie star:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Iago-Animated-Image.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58318\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Iago-Animated-Image.gif\" alt=\"iago-animated-image\" width=\"500\" height=\"209\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Did any of these come true?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nope.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But she\u003cem> was\u003c/em> right about a few things. She correctly predicted that \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/prince/\">Prince\u003c/a>, Muhammad Ali, and Fidel Castro would die; \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/one-direction/\">One Direction would break up\u003c/a>; and \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/the-only-way-to-process-angelina-jolie-and-brad-pitts-divorce/\">Brangelina would consciously uncouple\u003c/a>. And in 2013, her hunch that a man would be bitten to death by a beaver in Belarus did come to pass.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So what does Nikki see around the river bend? Bring a few grains of salt and behold:\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>What does late night TV need more of? You might be thinking women, people of color, younger people, anyone who isn’t a 40+ straight white male. Well, you aren’t going to get any of that. What you will supposedly get is a late night talk show by Bernie Sanders. Based on this photo of me photobombing the Vermont Senator, I think I'm in the running to his Andy Richter-esque sidekick:\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>https://www.instagram.com/p/BNhvzI6glmF/?taken-by=excusemybeauty\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>President Obama and Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau are in supposed danger. And to that I say, dear 2017:\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/vbAPQY6.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58320\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/vbAPQY6.gif\" alt=\"vbapqy6\" width=\"480\" height=\"258\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>An impeachment of a U.S. politician is coming. Huh. I wonder who that could possibly be about. Maybe this guy?\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_58165\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 640px\">\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"size-large wp-image-58165\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-1020x574.jpg\" alt=\"Photo: Emmanuel Hapsis\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-1180x664.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-960x540.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-240x135.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-375x211.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-520x293.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye.jpg 1536w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Photo: Emmanuel Hapsis\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>A vacuum cleaner will murder someone. Roomba's Revenge! It'll murder you and then clean up the crime scene!\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/funny-evil-girlfriend-prank-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58330\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/funny-evil-girlfriend-prank-gif.gif\" alt=\"funny-evil-girlfriend-prank-gif\" width=\"425\" height=\"388\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">A dog with glasses will become a school teacher. Maybe Air Bud is bored of basketball?\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/anigif_original-grid-image-8157-1466001399-11.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58331\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/anigif_original-grid-image-8157-1466001399-11.gif\" alt=\"anigif_original-grid-image-8157-1466001399-11\" width=\"352\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">A Washington politician will strip naked after getting drunk. To \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ETQQNw2wHk\">quote Valerie Cherish\u003c/a>, \"Note to self, after a long day at work, I don’t wanna see that!\" (...unless it’s Barack).\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/cover-eyes.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58333\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/cover-eyes.gif\" alt=\"cover-eyes\" width=\"244\" height=\"150\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Bad news for me and other Bay Area denizens. The Golden Gate Bridge will be partly destroyed, a gigantic earthquake will hit, as will a meteor. It’s been real, y’all.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/mega-shark-giant-octopus-11-bridge-work-saint-pauly-wtf-text.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58159\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/mega-shark-giant-octopus-11-bridge-work-saint-pauly-wtf-text.gif\" alt=\"mega-shark-giant-octopus-11-bridge-work-saint-pauly-wtf-text\" width=\"600\" height=\"336\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">A robot will break into the White House. My money is on Vicki the Robot from \u003cem>Small Wonder.\u003c/em>\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/539342_absurdnoise-80s-tv-bad-tv-small-wonder-vicky-the-robot.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58160\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/539342_absurdnoise-80s-tv-bad-tv-small-wonder-vicky-the-robot.gif\" alt=\"539342_absurdnoise-80s-tv-bad-tv-small-wonder-vicky-the-robot\" width=\"294\" height=\"300\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>Alec Baldwin will run for political office.\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mdlz4bYl3i1r9iu1oo1_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58334\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mdlz4bYl3i1r9iu1oo1_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_mdlz4byl3i1r9iu1oo1_500\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">2017 is going to be a big year for Drake, who will star in a Western, buy a sports team, direct a movie, get into a real relationship and have a child. Must be a morning person to get all that done in the next 11 and a half months.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/work-rihanna-lyrics-ft-drake.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58336\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/work-rihanna-lyrics-ft-drake.gif\" alt=\"work-rihanna-lyrics-ft-drake\" width=\"500\" height=\"266\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>Justin Bieber will also father a child.\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/j-bieber-baby.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58337\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/j-bieber-baby.gif\" alt=\"j-bieber-baby\" width=\"318\" height=\"214\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Pamela Anderson will get bitten by a wild animal.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/pam_fainting.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58338\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/pam_fainting.gif\" alt=\"pam_fainting\" width=\"456\" height=\"336\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">A monkey, perhaps the animal that plans on biting Pam, will pull Jimmy Kimmel’s hair out on his show. But he will be OK.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/bunheads-hair-pull-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58339\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/bunheads-hair-pull-gif.gif\" alt=\"bunheads-hair-pull-gif\" width=\"305\" height=\"254\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>If you thought \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/the-only-way-to-process-angelina-jolie-and-brad-pitts-divorce/\">the dissolution of Angelina and Brad\u003c/a> was hard on your spirit, get ready 'cause all of these breakups are allegedly coming:\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp style=\"padding-left: 30px\">Amal and George Clooney, \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Julia Roberts and her hot cinematographer husband (I determined his hotness by Googling his name and the term \"beach\"), \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Kim and Kanye, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Ellen and Portia, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">David and Victoria Beckham, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Eva Mendez and Ryan Gosling, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Tim McGraw and Faith Hill, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Barbara Streisand and James Brolin, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Annette Bening and Warren Beatty, and \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel. So either love is dead or this psychic is bad at her job and/or hates celebrities. It's 50/50.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/slide_335008_3365101_free.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58335\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/slide_335008_3365101_free.gif\" alt=\"slide_335008_3365101_free\" width=\"500\" height=\"271\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I think that's enough prophecy for one sitting, but if you're still craving more bonkers predictions, give this episode of \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/category/the-cooler/\">The Cooler\u003c/a>\u003c/em> a listen!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c!-- iframe plugin v.4.3 wordpress.org/plugins/iframe/ -->\u003cbr>\n\u003ciframe width=\"100%\" height=\"166\" scrolling=\"no\" frameborder=\"no\" src=\"https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/302316901&color=ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false\" class=\"iframe-class\">\u003c/iframe>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "What does this psychic see around the river bend? Bring a few grains of salt and behold!",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cem>This piece was inspired by an episode of \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">The Cooler\u003c/a>, KQED’s weekly pop culture podcast. Give it a listen!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c!-- iframe plugin v.4.3 wordpress.org/plugins/iframe/ -->\u003cbr>\n\u003ciframe width=\"100%\" height=\"166\" scrolling=\"no\" frameborder=\"no\" src=\"https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/302316901&color=ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false\" class=\"iframe-class\">\u003c/iframe>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Uncertainty has been the only thing certain in recent months. Checking to see if a headline is real or a joke from \u003cem>The Onion\u003c/em> has become a daily practice. Gone are the days when we could correctly assume how things might turn out. Or are they?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nikki, self-proclaimed Psychic to the Stars, believes she already knows what's coming. Last year, \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/01/14/the-10-most-amusing-predictions-nikki-psychic-to-the-stars-made-for-2016/\">I shared 10 of her most amusing predictions\u003c/a>. They included:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A new head at Mt. Rushmore:\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_58315\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 768px\">\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"wp-image-58315 size-full\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432.jpg\" alt=\"beyonce-rushmore-768x432\" width=\"768\" height=\"432\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432-240x135.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432-375x211.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/beyonce-rushmore-768x432-520x293.jpg 520w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 768px) 100vw, 768px\">\u003c/a>\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">In Bey We Trust. (Photo: Emmanuel Hapsis)\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>A monkey breaking into the White House:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/anigif_enhanced-buzz-25328-1384182042-35.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-58317\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/anigif_enhanced-buzz-25328-1384182042-35.gif\" alt=\"anigif_enhanced-buzz-25328-1384182042-35\" width=\"477\" height=\"270\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Kim and Kanye having a baby named Kristal South:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/kimk-1415673876.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58316\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/kimk-1415673876.gif\" alt=\"kimk-1415673876\" width=\"460\" height=\"262\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And a pet parrot killing a movie star:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Iago-Animated-Image.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58318\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/Iago-Animated-Image.gif\" alt=\"iago-animated-image\" width=\"500\" height=\"209\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Did any of these come true?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nope.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But she\u003cem> was\u003c/em> right about a few things. She correctly predicted that \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/prince/\">Prince\u003c/a>, Muhammad Ali, and Fidel Castro would die; \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/tag/one-direction/\">One Direction would break up\u003c/a>; and \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/the-only-way-to-process-angelina-jolie-and-brad-pitts-divorce/\">Brangelina would consciously uncouple\u003c/a>. And in 2013, her hunch that a man would be bitten to death by a beaver in Belarus did come to pass.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So what does Nikki see around the river bend? Bring a few grains of salt and behold:\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>What does late night TV need more of? You might be thinking women, people of color, younger people, anyone who isn’t a 40+ straight white male. Well, you aren’t going to get any of that. What you will supposedly get is a late night talk show by Bernie Sanders. Based on this photo of me photobombing the Vermont Senator, I think I'm in the running to his Andy Richter-esque sidekick:\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cul>\n\u003cli>President Obama and Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau are in supposed danger. And to that I say, dear 2017:\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/vbAPQY6.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58320\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/vbAPQY6.gif\" alt=\"vbapqy6\" width=\"480\" height=\"258\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>An impeachment of a U.S. politician is coming. Huh. I wonder who that could possibly be about. Maybe this guy?\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_58165\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 640px\">\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye.jpg\">\u003cimg class=\"size-large wp-image-58165\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-1020x574.jpg\" alt=\"Photo: Emmanuel Hapsis\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-1180x664.jpg 1180w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-960x540.jpg 960w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-240x135.jpg 240w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-375x211.jpg 375w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye-520x293.jpg 520w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/trump-boy-bye.jpg 1536w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/a>\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Photo: Emmanuel Hapsis\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>A vacuum cleaner will murder someone. Roomba's Revenge! It'll murder you and then clean up the crime scene!\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/funny-evil-girlfriend-prank-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58330\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/funny-evil-girlfriend-prank-gif.gif\" alt=\"funny-evil-girlfriend-prank-gif\" width=\"425\" height=\"388\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">A dog with glasses will become a school teacher. Maybe Air Bud is bored of basketball?\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/anigif_original-grid-image-8157-1466001399-11.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58331\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/anigif_original-grid-image-8157-1466001399-11.gif\" alt=\"anigif_original-grid-image-8157-1466001399-11\" width=\"352\" height=\"240\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">A Washington politician will strip naked after getting drunk. To \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ETQQNw2wHk\">quote Valerie Cherish\u003c/a>, \"Note to self, after a long day at work, I don’t wanna see that!\" (...unless it’s Barack).\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/cover-eyes.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58333\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/cover-eyes.gif\" alt=\"cover-eyes\" width=\"244\" height=\"150\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Bad news for me and other Bay Area denizens. The Golden Gate Bridge will be partly destroyed, a gigantic earthquake will hit, as will a meteor. It’s been real, y’all.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/mega-shark-giant-octopus-11-bridge-work-saint-pauly-wtf-text.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58159\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/mega-shark-giant-octopus-11-bridge-work-saint-pauly-wtf-text.gif\" alt=\"mega-shark-giant-octopus-11-bridge-work-saint-pauly-wtf-text\" width=\"600\" height=\"336\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">A robot will break into the White House. My money is on Vicki the Robot from \u003cem>Small Wonder.\u003c/em>\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/539342_absurdnoise-80s-tv-bad-tv-small-wonder-vicky-the-robot.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58160\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/539342_absurdnoise-80s-tv-bad-tv-small-wonder-vicky-the-robot.gif\" alt=\"539342_absurdnoise-80s-tv-bad-tv-small-wonder-vicky-the-robot\" width=\"294\" height=\"300\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>Alec Baldwin will run for political office.\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mdlz4bYl3i1r9iu1oo1_500.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58334\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/tumblr_mdlz4bYl3i1r9iu1oo1_500.gif\" alt=\"tumblr_mdlz4byl3i1r9iu1oo1_500\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">2017 is going to be a big year for Drake, who will star in a Western, buy a sports team, direct a movie, get into a real relationship and have a child. Must be a morning person to get all that done in the next 11 and a half months.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/work-rihanna-lyrics-ft-drake.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58336\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/work-rihanna-lyrics-ft-drake.gif\" alt=\"work-rihanna-lyrics-ft-drake\" width=\"500\" height=\"266\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>Justin Bieber will also father a child.\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/j-bieber-baby.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58337\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/j-bieber-baby.gif\" alt=\"j-bieber-baby\" width=\"318\" height=\"214\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Pamela Anderson will get bitten by a wild animal.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/pam_fainting.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58338\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/pam_fainting.gif\" alt=\"pam_fainting\" width=\"456\" height=\"336\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">A monkey, perhaps the animal that plans on biting Pam, will pull Jimmy Kimmel’s hair out on his show. But he will be OK.\u003c/span>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/bunheads-hair-pull-gif.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58339\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/bunheads-hair-pull-gif.gif\" alt=\"bunheads-hair-pull-gif\" width=\"305\" height=\"254\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp> \u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>If you thought \u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/2016/09/20/the-only-way-to-process-angelina-jolie-and-brad-pitts-divorce/\">the dissolution of Angelina and Brad\u003c/a> was hard on your spirit, get ready 'cause all of these breakups are allegedly coming:\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp style=\"padding-left: 30px\">Amal and George Clooney, \u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Julia Roberts and her hot cinematographer husband (I determined his hotness by Googling his name and the term \"beach\"), \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Kim and Kanye, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Ellen and Portia, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">David and Victoria Beckham, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Eva Mendez and Ryan Gosling, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Tim McGraw and Faith Hill, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Barbara Streisand and James Brolin, \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Annette Bening and Warren Beatty, and \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel. So either love is dead or this psychic is bad at her job and/or hates celebrities. It's 50/50.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/slide_335008_3365101_free.gif\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-58335\" src=\"http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/01/slide_335008_3365101_free.gif\" alt=\"slide_335008_3365101_free\" width=\"500\" height=\"271\">\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I think that's enough prophecy for one sitting, but if you're still craving more bonkers predictions, give this episode of \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/category/the-cooler/\">The Cooler\u003c/a>\u003c/em> a listen!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c!-- iframe plugin v.4.3 wordpress.org/plugins/iframe/ -->\u003cbr>\n\u003ciframe width=\"100%\" height=\"166\" scrolling=\"no\" frameborder=\"no\" src=\"https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/302316901&color=ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false\" class=\"iframe-class\">\u003c/iframe>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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},
"closealltabs": {
"id": "closealltabs",
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"order": 1
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"title": "Code Switch / Life Kit",
"info": "\u003cem>Code Switch\u003c/em>, which listeners will hear in the first part of the hour, has fearless and much-needed conversations about race. Hosted by journalists of color, the show tackles the subject of race head-on, exploring how it impacts every part of society — from politics and pop culture to history, sports and more.\u003cbr />\u003cbr />\u003cem>Life Kit\u003c/em>, which will be in the second part of the hour, guides you through spaces and feelings no one prepares you for — from finances to mental health, from workplace microaggressions to imposter syndrome, from relationships to parenting. The show features experts with real world experience and shares their knowledge. Because everyone needs a little help being human.\u003cbr />\u003cbr />\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/podcasts/510312/codeswitch\">\u003cem>Code Switch\u003c/em> offical site and podcast\u003c/a>\u003cbr />\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/lifekit\">\u003cem>Life Kit\u003c/em> offical site and podcast\u003c/a>\u003cbr />",
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"id": "commonwealth-club",
"title": "Commonwealth Club of California Podcast",
"info": "The Commonwealth Club of California is the nation's oldest and largest public affairs forum. As a non-partisan forum, The Club brings to the public airwaves diverse viewpoints on important topics. The Club's weekly radio broadcast - the oldest in the U.S., dating back to 1924 - is carried across the nation on public radio stations and is now podcasting. Our website archive features audio of our recent programs, as well as selected speeches from our long and distinguished history. This podcast feed is usually updated twice a week and is always un-edited.",
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"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Commonwealth-Club-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg",
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"source": "Commonwealth Club of California"
},
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"google": "https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cDovL3d3dy5jb21tb253ZWFsdGhjbHViLm9yZy9hdWRpby9wb2RjYXN0L3dlZWtseS54bWw",
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"id": "forum",
"title": "Forum",
"tagline": "The conversation starts here",
"info": "KQED’s live call-in program discussing local, state, national and international issues, as well as in-depth interviews.",
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"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Forum-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg",
"imageAlt": "KQED Forum with Mina Kim and Alexis Madrigal",
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"order": 9
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"id": "freakonomics-radio",
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"meta": {
"site": "radio",
"source": "WNYC"
},
"link": "/radio/program/freakonomics-radio",
"subscribe": {
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"apple": "https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/freakonomics-radio/id354668519",
"tuneIn": "https://tunein.com/podcasts/WNYC-Podcasts/Freakonomics-Radio-p272293/",
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},
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"id": "fresh-air",
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"apple": "https://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?s=143441&mt=2&id=214089682&at=11l79Y&ct=nprdirectory",
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"info": "A live production of NPR and WBUR Boston, in collaboration with stations across the country, Here & Now reflects the fluid world of news as it's happening in the middle of the day, with timely, in-depth news, interviews and conversation. Hosted by Robin Young, Jeremy Hobson and Tonya Mosley.",
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"hidden-brain": {
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"info": "Shankar Vedantam uses science and storytelling to reveal the unconscious patterns that drive human behavior, shape our choices and direct our relationships.",
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"airtime": "SUN 7pm-8pm",
"meta": {
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"source": "NPR"
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"how-i-built-this": {
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"info": "Guy Raz dives into the stories behind some of the world's best known companies. How I Built This weaves a narrative journey about innovators, entrepreneurs and idealists—and the movements they built.",
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"airtime": "SUN 7:30pm-8pm",
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"link": "/radio/program/how-i-built-this",
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"hyphenacion": {
"id": "hyphenacion",
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"tagline": "Where conversation and cultura meet",
"info": "What kind of no sabo word is Hyphenación? For us, it’s about living within a hyphenation. Like being a third-gen Mexican-American from the Texas border now living that Bay Area Chicano life. Like Xorje! Each week we bring together a couple of hyphenated Latinos to talk all about personal life choices: family, careers, relationships, belonging … everything is on the table. ",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Hyphenacion_FinalAssets_PodcastTile.png",
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"order": 15
},
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"jerrybrown": {
"id": "jerrybrown",
"title": "The Political Mind of Jerry Brown",
"tagline": "Lessons from a lifetime in politics",
"info": "The Political Mind of Jerry Brown brings listeners the wisdom of the former Governor, Mayor, and presidential candidate. Scott Shafer interviewed Brown for more than 40 hours, covering the former governor's life and half-century in the political game – and Brown has some lessons he'd like to share. ",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/The-Political-Mind-of-Jerry-Brown-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg",
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"officialWebsiteLink": "/podcasts/jerrybrown",
"meta": {
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"order": 18
},
"link": "/podcasts/jerrybrown",
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},
"latino-usa": {
"id": "latino-usa",
"title": "Latino USA",
"airtime": "MON 1am-2am, SUN 6pm-7pm",
"info": "Latino USA, the radio journal of news and culture, is the only national, English-language radio program produced from a Latino perspective.",
"imageSrc": "https://ww2.kqed.org/radio/wp-content/uploads/sites/50/2018/04/latinoUsa.jpg",
"officialWebsiteLink": "http://latinousa.org/",
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"link": "/radio/program/latino-usa",
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"apple": "https://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?s=143441&mt=2&id=79681317&at=11l79Y&ct=nprdirectory",
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"rss": "https://feeds.npr.org/510016/podcast.xml"
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},
"marketplace": {
"id": "marketplace",
"title": "Marketplace",
"info": "Our flagship program, helmed by Kai Ryssdal, examines what the day in money delivered, through stories, conversations, newsworthy numbers and more. Updated Monday through Friday at about 3:30 p.m. PT.",
"airtime": "MON-FRI 4pm-4:30pm, MON-WED 6:30pm-7pm",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Marketplace-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg",
"officialWebsiteLink": "https://www.marketplace.org/",
"meta": {
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"source": "American Public Media"
},
"link": "/radio/program/marketplace",
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},
"masters-of-scale": {
"id": "masters-of-scale",
"title": "Masters of Scale",
"info": "Masters of Scale is an original podcast in which LinkedIn co-founder and Greylock Partner Reid Hoffman sets out to describe and prove theories that explain how great entrepreneurs take their companies from zero to a gazillion in ingenious fashion.",
"airtime": "Every other Wednesday June 12 through October 16 at 8pm (repeats Thursdays at 2am)",
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"meta": {
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"source": "WaitWhat"
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"rss": "https://rss.art19.com/masters-of-scale"
}
},
"mindshift": {
"id": "mindshift",
"title": "MindShift",
"tagline": "A podcast about the future of learning and how we raise our kids",
"info": "The MindShift podcast explores the innovations in education that are shaping how kids learn. Hosts Ki Sung and Katrina Schwartz introduce listeners to educators, researchers, parents and students who are developing effective ways to improve how kids learn. We cover topics like how fed-up administrators are developing surprising tactics to deal with classroom disruptions; how listening to podcasts are helping kids develop reading skills; the consequences of overparenting; and why interdisciplinary learning can engage students on all ends of the traditional achievement spectrum. This podcast is part of the MindShift education site, a division of KQED News. KQED is an NPR/PBS member station based in San Francisco. You can also visit the MindShift website for episodes and supplemental blog posts or tweet us \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/MindShiftKQED\">@MindShiftKQED\u003c/a> or visit us at \u003ca href=\"/mindshift\">MindShift.KQED.org\u003c/a>",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Mindshift-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg",
"imageAlt": "KQED MindShift: How We Will Learn",
"officialWebsiteLink": "/mindshift/",
"meta": {
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"source": "kqed",
"order": 12
},
"link": "/podcasts/mindshift",
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"google": "https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5tZWdhcGhvbmUuZm0vS1FJTkM1NzY0NjAwNDI5",
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}
},
"morning-edition": {
"id": "morning-edition",
"title": "Morning Edition",
"info": "\u003cem>Morning Edition\u003c/em> takes listeners around the country and the world with multi-faceted stories and commentaries every weekday. Hosts Steve Inskeep, David Greene and Rachel Martin bring you the latest breaking news and features to prepare you for the day.",
"airtime": "MON-FRI 3am-9am",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Morning-Edition-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg",
"officialWebsiteLink": "https://www.npr.org/programs/morning-edition/",
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"link": "/radio/program/morning-edition"
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"onourwatch": {
"id": "onourwatch",
"title": "On Our Watch",
"tagline": "Deeply-reported investigative journalism",
"info": "For decades, the process for how police police themselves has been inconsistent – if not opaque. In some states, like California, these proceedings were completely hidden. After a new police transparency law unsealed scores of internal affairs files, our reporters set out to examine these cases and the shadow world of police discipline. On Our Watch brings listeners into the rooms where officers are questioned and witnesses are interrogated to find out who this system is really protecting. Is it the officers, or the public they've sworn to serve?",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/On-Our-Watch-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg",
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"officialWebsiteLink": "/podcasts/onourwatch",
"meta": {
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"source": "kqed",
"order": 11
},
"link": "/podcasts/onourwatch",
"subscribe": {
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"google": "https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5ucHIub3JnLzUxMDM2MC9wb2RjYXN0LnhtbD9zYz1nb29nbGVwb2RjYXN0cw",
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},
"on-the-media": {
"id": "on-the-media",
"title": "On The Media",
"info": "Our weekly podcast explores how the media 'sausage' is made, casts an incisive eye on fluctuations in the marketplace of ideas, and examines threats to the freedom of information and expression in America and abroad. For one hour a week, the show tries to lift the veil from the process of \"making media,\" especially news media, because it's through that lens that we see the world and the world sees us",
"airtime": "SUN 2pm-3pm, MON 12am-1am",
"imageSrc": "https://ww2.kqed.org/radio/wp-content/uploads/sites/50/2018/04/onTheMedia.png",
"officialWebsiteLink": "https://www.wnycstudios.org/shows/otm",
"meta": {
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"source": "wnyc"
},
"link": "/radio/program/on-the-media",
"subscribe": {
"apple": "https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/on-the-media/id73330715?mt=2",
"tuneIn": "https://tunein.com/radio/On-the-Media-p69/",
"rss": "http://feeds.wnyc.org/onthemedia"
}
},
"pbs-newshour": {
"id": "pbs-newshour",
"title": "PBS NewsHour",
"info": "Analysis, background reports and updates from the PBS NewsHour putting today's news in context.",
"airtime": "MON-FRI 3pm-4pm",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/PBS-News-Hour-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg",
"officialWebsiteLink": "https://www.pbs.org/newshour/",
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},
"link": "/radio/program/pbs-newshour",
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"apple": "https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/pbs-newshour-full-show/id394432287?mt=2",
"tuneIn": "https://tunein.com/radio/PBS-NewsHour---Full-Show-p425698/",
"rss": "https://www.pbs.org/newshour/feeds/rss/podcasts/show"
}
},
"perspectives": {
"id": "perspectives",
"title": "Perspectives",
"tagline": "KQED's series of daily listener commentaries since 1991",
"info": "KQED's series of daily listener commentaries since 1991.",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Perspectives_Tile_Final.jpg",
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"officialWebsiteLink": "/perspectives/",
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"source": "kqed",
"order": 14
},
"link": "/perspectives",
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"npr": "https://www.npr.org/podcasts/432309616/perspectives",
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},
"planet-money": {
"id": "planet-money",
"title": "Planet Money",
"info": "The economy explained. Imagine you could call up a friend and say, Meet me at the bar and tell me what's going on with the economy. Now imagine that's actually a fun evening.",
"airtime": "SUN 3pm-4pm",
"imageSrc": "https://ww2.kqed.org/radio/wp-content/uploads/sites/50/2018/04/planetmoney.jpg",
"officialWebsiteLink": "https://www.npr.org/sections/money/",
"meta": {
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"source": "npr"
},
"link": "/radio/program/planet-money",
"subscribe": {
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