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"content": "\u003cp>Every young person deserves a normal childhood filled with school, extracurriculars, birthday celebrations and, of course, wonderful winter holidays. These early experiences are crucial parts of a healthy developmental path: Kids who don’t get them are at elevated risk for a host of lifelong mental health challenges, including difficulties managing relationships and a diminished ability to take care of oneself, find love or even hold a job.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Unfortunately, this December, transgender children across the country are going to have very abnormal holiday experiences. These kids are attempting to celebrate the holidays in the face of an unprecedented campaign of state-sponsored hatred against them, including hundreds of \u003ca href=\"https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2022/10/14/anti-trans-bills/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">bills specifically targeting trans kids\u003c/a>, and crackpot misinformation purveyed by influencers with extremely broad reaches. And inevitably, around dinner tables and during gift exchanges, some of these children will find themselves at the center of debates about their right to exist. [aside postid='arts_13914743']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I well know the damage this does to children. I was once a trans kid, feeling the weight of a shameful secret that I held for my whole family, hyper-aware of anything that might reference the thing that we all daren’t speak of. And in my work providing peer support and mental health therapy to trans people, I’ve spoken with innumerable minors who tell me what it’s like to feel that they’re responsible for the feelings of all the adults around them. As a result, these children have elevated rates of anxiety, depression, self-harm and suicidality — things that are incredibly difficult to change if the adults responsible for these kids don’t step up.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Laura Anderson, a licensed child and family psychologist who has worked for years in trans healthcare, shared how complicated the holidays can be for everyone. She’s helped untangle complicated questions about which family members a kid is out to, whether or not relatives will respect a child’s identity, what to do if a child starts to feel uncomfortable during a gathering, and how to best make kids feel respected and affirmed. Even something as simple as a gift can be challenging: “What do you do if grandma buys all the boys dump trucks?” Anderson asks. “Trans kids can feel either seen or not seen based on if they’re misgendered by gifts. I’ve also seen adults laugh at gifts that are gender-expansive — you can see that they are uncomfortable.” [aside postid='education_535891']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Melissa Brown, a licensed marriage and family therapist, tells me about the guilt that her young trans clients internalize, coming to believe that they’re to blame for everything. “It’s really up to parents to say to them, you don’t have to take care of us, and it’s not your fault, you’re not responsible for this,” Brown says. “It’s about acknowledging that and dealing with it when it inevitably comes up.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It’s normal and OK for adults to feel uncomfortable and confused when a child in their life comes out as trans. Brown notes that grief is a common experience; supporting a trans child can place adults into challenging situations. “I’ve worked with parents who have had to give up long-term friends,” Brown explains. “It’s hard for them to be able to hold that grief and loss of a relationship.” [pullquote]Just as I’ve seen how harmful it can be when parents don’t show up for their trans kids, I’ve also seen how transformative it is when those children feel truly loved and supported by their caregivers.[/pullquote]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Adults are certainly allowed to feel daunted by the challenge of making space for their trans kid to have a normal, happy childhood. But while parents work through their own issues, it’s not appropriate for them to make their children feel responsible. This sends the message to kids that they’re the problem and their parents feel ashamed of who they are, or that they can’t count on their parents’ unconditional love and support. Holidays are a crucial time when parents need to show their trans kids that they are loved.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anderson believes that adults can help by taking the burden off of children and placing it where it belongs. She recommends that parents and relatives have frank talks with each other about anti-trans misinformation, or about old-school gender norms that are no longer valid. It’s the responsibility of adults to deal with this on their own, and not place the burden on children just trying to enjoy their holidays. [aside postid='arts_13881725']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Just as I’ve seen how harmful it can be when parents don’t show up for their trans kids, I’ve also seen how transformative it is when those children feel truly loved and supported by their caregivers. Moments like that are truly life-changing, and they create unique bonds among family. In the words of Anderson, “There’s a really distinct kind of closeness that can come with family, where you’re leaning into what kids need and communicating with their adults.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This December, adults need to leave the politics at the door and really show up for the young people in their lives — after a long and difficult 2022, they deserve nothing less.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-12127869\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-800x78.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"78\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg 400w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-768x75.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Veronica Esposito is a writer, transgender advocate and associate marriage and family therapist specializing in supporting transgender clients. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cp>Every winter, scores upon scores of schmaltzy seasonal movies get spewed upon the public in an opportunistic deluge that rarely results in anything memorable. This year, there were at least 170 (!) and all of them — every single one — were aimed at the broadest (blandest?) possible audience. Meaning: They were\u003cem> boring\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For those of us who want Christmas movies that \u003cem>don’t\u003c/em> revolve around (a) romance, (b) coming home to a small town after living a big city, or (c) saving a local business, viewing options are few and far between. Which is why this year, I decided to lean into a few Christmas movies from bygone years that are so bizarre, you’ll wonder what your eggnog’s been spiked with.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Even better? All are available to stream for free. Hold onto your shelf elf!\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cem>Santa Claus Conquers the Martians \u003c/em>(1964)\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922358\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922358\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-4.54.21-PM-800x651.png\" alt=\"Promotional green, white and red poster advertising 'Santa Claus Conquers the Martians.' It features a rocket in the center, Santa and human children on the left and alien children and one adult on the right.\" width=\"800\" height=\"651\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-4.54.21-PM-800x651.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-4.54.21-PM-1020x831.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-4.54.21-PM-160x130.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-4.54.21-PM-768x625.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-4.54.21-PM.png 1518w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Aliens from Mars use laundry baskets too, you know.\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Before we get into it, I should probably mention that \u003cem>Santa Claus Conquers the Martians\u003c/em> is one of the worst movies ever made. You will marvel, throughout its 80 minutes, that people agreed to be in it and that entire teams of presumably rational humans worked on it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Why am I telling you to watch it then? Because this is a sci-fi period piece that also happens to be as child-friendly as it is excellent fodder for a drinking game. (Drink every time someone fake-laughs at one of Santa’s “jokes”! Drink every time you notice weird, thinly veiled sexism! Drink throughout the last 10 minutes lest you feel like you’re on a bad acid trip!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some background: The extraterrestrials in \u003cem>Santa Claus Conquers the Martians\u003c/em> are from Mars, they have green food coloring all over their faces, poorly constructed antennas on their helmets and they have names like Dropo and Lady Momar. This advanced, unjustifiably snooty species is in possession of a variety of alien accoutrements including “the tickling ray,” “sleep spray” and “retro rockets.” Despite this, their kids are depressed, refusing to eat and sitting around watching human TV all day, much to the chagrin of their food-pill-popping parents.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Concerned, Kimar, leader of the martians, consults with an 800-year-old sage named Chochem who tells them they need “a Santa Claus” to cheer up the kids. So the martians head to Earth, kidnap two children (named Billy and Betty because: 1964), fly to the North Pole and try to hunt Santa down. There are very low-budget encounters with a polar bear and a robot named Torg, as well as a brilliantly terrible slow-motion karate chop fight.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922356\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922356\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Bear-robot-800x495.jpg\" alt=\"(L) A human dressed as a polar bear. (R) A very primitive, 1960s-era robot.\" width=\"800\" height=\"495\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Hi-tech special effects from the 1960s courtesy of ‘Santa Claus Conquers the Martians.’. \u003ccite>('Santa Conquers the Martians.')\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Other things happen. Everything is low stakes. Weird, aggressively soundtracked sections promoting the U.S. military occur. At one point Santa mourns the advent of automation. (He’s super into child labor, you see.) Oh, and the theme song is a banger.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You can watch this car crash, in its entirety, below. It is quaint and your children will laugh at it for all the wrong reasons.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4SZyeUGSM4\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>***\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cem>Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny\u003c/em> (1972)\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922440\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922440\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-1.07.59-PM-800x505.png\" alt=\"A human dressed like a white rabbit, behind the wheel of a car, being cheered on by three children cheering him on from the back seat.\" width=\"800\" height=\"505\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">The Easter Bunny from this Christmas movie, arriving to eat your soul.\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>The premise of this one is that Santa winds up trapped on a beach in Florida (the horror!) because his reindeers couldn’t take the literal heat and bailed on him. After talk-singing like a booze-fueled William Shatner, Santa responds to his predicament by luring random children to his side, Pied Piper style. (Nothing creepy about that at all.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='arts_13889748']The kids bring a variety of animals to see if they can pull the sleigh, including a mule, a hog, a sheep, a cow, a horse and a human man wearing a gorilla suit. When everything fails, rather than make any effort whatsoever to get his sleigh back to the North Pole, Santa decides to sit around and tell the children stories instead. What follows is a quietly sinister rendition of \u003cem>Thumbelina, \u003c/em>that includes terrifying mole people and — oh good! — a child marriage.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Once the (frankly astounding) movie-within-a-movie is over, back on the beach, a giant white rabbit shows up, roaring up in a giant red car full of kids. (This movie stands as a testament to the lackadaisical attitude towards parental supervision that ran amok during the 1970s.) The rabbit is in possession of all of the comforting charisma of Frank, the man-sized bunny from \u003cem>Donnie Darko\u003c/em>. He pledges to get Santa home in his car and … that’s it. That’s the end.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you only watch one of the unhinged Christmas movies on this list, make it this one:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Voyn3forAT8\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>***\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cem>Santa Claus\u003c/em> (1959)\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922362\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922362\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM-800x625.png\" alt=\"A promotional movie poster that shows a painting of Santa alongside a photo of a live action Santa arguing with a man dressed like the devil and covered in red body paint.\" width=\"800\" height=\"625\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM-800x625.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM-1020x797.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM-160x125.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM-768x600.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM-1536x1201.png 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM.png 1604w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">And now: A ‘Santa Claus’ movie that has absolutely nothing to do with Tim Allen.\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>If you’ve ever wondered who would win in a fight between Santa and Satan (their names \u003cem>are\u003c/em> similar), then this is the movie for you!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In this one, Santa lives in a crystal palace on a cloud floating above the North Pole. He laughs all of the time, prompted by nothing at all, like \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gJdGp86Lxag\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Laughing Sal\u003c/a> or a serial killer. His \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: line-through\">sweatshop\u003c/span> workshop is inhabited by children from around the world who are forced to wear official national dress to work every day, and sing in the languages of their homelands every time Santa (the tyrant) plays a white organ.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='arts_13921477']One day, a toy that looks like Satan shows up in the workshop. Naturally, Santa sets it on fire. This sends a signal to a whole army of dancing devils down in hell. Satan then sends one of them up to Earth to defeat Santa and try to get random children to do evil deeds. (One of the kids chucks a rock at Santa’s forehead and it is genuinely hilarious\u003cem>.\u003c/em>)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the battle between Santa and Satan, remarkably it’s Santa that ends up looking like the bigger creep most of the time. All the devil does is sabotage chimneys and tell kids to steal things. Santa, on the other hand, has a bunch of invasive monitoring equipment in his workshop, including a “teletalker that knows everything” and a machine that can see inside small children’s dreams. (WHAT.) At one point, Santa fires an arrow into the devil’s butt. By the time Santa has the cops called on him for breaking into people’s houses, it kinda feels justified.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Could the filmmakers have worked a bit harder on the movie title? Sure. Could they have made the devil a little bit more evil? Absolutely. Could we have avoided an entire sequence where a small girl stands in a sea of dry ice surrounded by life-size dancing dolls wearing masks of terror? One would think. But this Mexican classic is still more entertaining than anything that came out on Hallmark this year.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You can watch \u003cem>Santa Claus\u003c/em> in full below:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=htZqn3vPoJk\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>***\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cem>The Magic Christmas Tree\u003c/em> (1964)\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922466\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922466\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-4.49.30-PM-800x529.png\" alt=\"A young boy of about 12 stands next to Santa Claus and a tinsel-covered tree.\" width=\"800\" height=\"529\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-4.49.30-PM-800x529.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-4.49.30-PM-1020x675.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-4.49.30-PM-160x106.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-4.49.30-PM-768x508.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-4.49.30-PM.png 1282w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">A boy, a Santa and a magic Christmas tree. Must be ‘The Magic Tree’!\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Mark is a young boy with the same energy as a middle-aged father of four who works in construction. One day, he makes the fateful decision to go and visit an elderly woman who’s rumored to be a witch. (She’s wearing a grey wig and her cat is named Lucifer, so … foregone conclusion.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='arts_13922004']After falling down and hitting his head, Mark wakes up and the world is suddenly in color, \u003cem>Wizard of Oz\u003c/em>-style. The witch gives him a magic ring with a seed inside it that enables Mark to grow a magic tree that will grant him three wishes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One night, Mark’s entire family leaves him unattended (because: 1960s), so he goes outside and has a chat with the sexually ambiguous talking tree that sprang up moments after he planted it. Soon, Mark acquires magic powers that he uses out on the street for hijinks and chaos. (Weirdly, some of the people involved in said chaos appear to be driving the ice cream bunny’s giant red car. Coincidence?) Then Mark makes Santa Claus come over and bogarts him, preventing him from visiting other kids’ houses for the rest of the night. This, for some reason, really aggravates a giant. (And no, it doesn’t make any sense in the movie either…)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>There are consequences, lessons and probably a mild concussion involved — which contributes to the feeling of being hit over the head repeatedly while watching it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you get all the way through this one, you probably deserve three wishes of your own:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jkkkONKOPxg\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Merry Christmas, weirdos!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-12127869\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"78\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg 400w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-768x75.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Santa! Satan! The Easter Bunny! Child labor! Here are four Christmas movies you definitely won't find on Lifetime.",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Every winter, scores upon scores of schmaltzy seasonal movies get spewed upon the public in an opportunistic deluge that rarely results in anything memorable. This year, there were at least 170 (!) and all of them — every single one — were aimed at the broadest (blandest?) possible audience. Meaning: They were\u003cem> boring\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For those of us who want Christmas movies that \u003cem>don’t\u003c/em> revolve around (a) romance, (b) coming home to a small town after living a big city, or (c) saving a local business, viewing options are few and far between. Which is why this year, I decided to lean into a few Christmas movies from bygone years that are so bizarre, you’ll wonder what your eggnog’s been spiked with.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Even better? All are available to stream for free. Hold onto your shelf elf!\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cem>Santa Claus Conquers the Martians \u003c/em>(1964)\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922358\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922358\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-4.54.21-PM-800x651.png\" alt=\"Promotional green, white and red poster advertising 'Santa Claus Conquers the Martians.' It features a rocket in the center, Santa and human children on the left and alien children and one adult on the right.\" width=\"800\" height=\"651\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-4.54.21-PM-800x651.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-4.54.21-PM-1020x831.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-4.54.21-PM-160x130.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-4.54.21-PM-768x625.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-4.54.21-PM.png 1518w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Aliens from Mars use laundry baskets too, you know.\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Before we get into it, I should probably mention that \u003cem>Santa Claus Conquers the Martians\u003c/em> is one of the worst movies ever made. You will marvel, throughout its 80 minutes, that people agreed to be in it and that entire teams of presumably rational humans worked on it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Why am I telling you to watch it then? Because this is a sci-fi period piece that also happens to be as child-friendly as it is excellent fodder for a drinking game. (Drink every time someone fake-laughs at one of Santa’s “jokes”! Drink every time you notice weird, thinly veiled sexism! Drink throughout the last 10 minutes lest you feel like you’re on a bad acid trip!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some background: The extraterrestrials in \u003cem>Santa Claus Conquers the Martians\u003c/em> are from Mars, they have green food coloring all over their faces, poorly constructed antennas on their helmets and they have names like Dropo and Lady Momar. This advanced, unjustifiably snooty species is in possession of a variety of alien accoutrements including “the tickling ray,” “sleep spray” and “retro rockets.” Despite this, their kids are depressed, refusing to eat and sitting around watching human TV all day, much to the chagrin of their food-pill-popping parents.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Concerned, Kimar, leader of the martians, consults with an 800-year-old sage named Chochem who tells them they need “a Santa Claus” to cheer up the kids. So the martians head to Earth, kidnap two children (named Billy and Betty because: 1964), fly to the North Pole and try to hunt Santa down. There are very low-budget encounters with a polar bear and a robot named Torg, as well as a brilliantly terrible slow-motion karate chop fight.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922356\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922356\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Bear-robot-800x495.jpg\" alt=\"(L) A human dressed as a polar bear. (R) A very primitive, 1960s-era robot.\" width=\"800\" height=\"495\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Hi-tech special effects from the 1960s courtesy of ‘Santa Claus Conquers the Martians.’. \u003ccite>('Santa Conquers the Martians.')\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Other things happen. Everything is low stakes. Weird, aggressively soundtracked sections promoting the U.S. military occur. At one point Santa mourns the advent of automation. (He’s super into child labor, you see.) Oh, and the theme song is a banger.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You can watch this car crash, in its entirety, below. It is quaint and your children will laugh at it for all the wrong reasons.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/L4SZyeUGSM4'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/L4SZyeUGSM4'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>***\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cem>Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny\u003c/em> (1972)\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922440\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922440\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-1.07.59-PM-800x505.png\" alt=\"A human dressed like a white rabbit, behind the wheel of a car, being cheered on by three children cheering him on from the back seat.\" width=\"800\" height=\"505\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">The Easter Bunny from this Christmas movie, arriving to eat your soul.\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>The premise of this one is that Santa winds up trapped on a beach in Florida (the horror!) because his reindeers couldn’t take the literal heat and bailed on him. After talk-singing like a booze-fueled William Shatner, Santa responds to his predicament by luring random children to his side, Pied Piper style. (Nothing creepy about that at all.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>The kids bring a variety of animals to see if they can pull the sleigh, including a mule, a hog, a sheep, a cow, a horse and a human man wearing a gorilla suit. When everything fails, rather than make any effort whatsoever to get his sleigh back to the North Pole, Santa decides to sit around and tell the children stories instead. What follows is a quietly sinister rendition of \u003cem>Thumbelina, \u003c/em>that includes terrifying mole people and — oh good! — a child marriage.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Once the (frankly astounding) movie-within-a-movie is over, back on the beach, a giant white rabbit shows up, roaring up in a giant red car full of kids. (This movie stands as a testament to the lackadaisical attitude towards parental supervision that ran amok during the 1970s.) The rabbit is in possession of all of the comforting charisma of Frank, the man-sized bunny from \u003cem>Donnie Darko\u003c/em>. He pledges to get Santa home in his car and … that’s it. That’s the end.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you only watch one of the unhinged Christmas movies on this list, make it this one:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/Voyn3forAT8'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/Voyn3forAT8'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>***\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cem>Santa Claus\u003c/em> (1959)\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922362\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922362\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM-800x625.png\" alt=\"A promotional movie poster that shows a painting of Santa alongside a photo of a live action Santa arguing with a man dressed like the devil and covered in red body paint.\" width=\"800\" height=\"625\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM-800x625.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM-1020x797.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM-160x125.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM-768x600.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM-1536x1201.png 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-05-at-11.31.43-PM.png 1604w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">And now: A ‘Santa Claus’ movie that has absolutely nothing to do with Tim Allen.\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>If you’ve ever wondered who would win in a fight between Santa and Satan (their names \u003cem>are\u003c/em> similar), then this is the movie for you!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In this one, Santa lives in a crystal palace on a cloud floating above the North Pole. He laughs all of the time, prompted by nothing at all, like \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gJdGp86Lxag\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Laughing Sal\u003c/a> or a serial killer. His \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: line-through\">sweatshop\u003c/span> workshop is inhabited by children from around the world who are forced to wear official national dress to work every day, and sing in the languages of their homelands every time Santa (the tyrant) plays a white organ.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>One day, a toy that looks like Satan shows up in the workshop. Naturally, Santa sets it on fire. This sends a signal to a whole army of dancing devils down in hell. Satan then sends one of them up to Earth to defeat Santa and try to get random children to do evil deeds. (One of the kids chucks a rock at Santa’s forehead and it is genuinely hilarious\u003cem>.\u003c/em>)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the battle between Santa and Satan, remarkably it’s Santa that ends up looking like the bigger creep most of the time. All the devil does is sabotage chimneys and tell kids to steal things. Santa, on the other hand, has a bunch of invasive monitoring equipment in his workshop, including a “teletalker that knows everything” and a machine that can see inside small children’s dreams. (WHAT.) At one point, Santa fires an arrow into the devil’s butt. By the time Santa has the cops called on him for breaking into people’s houses, it kinda feels justified.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Could the filmmakers have worked a bit harder on the movie title? Sure. Could they have made the devil a little bit more evil? Absolutely. Could we have avoided an entire sequence where a small girl stands in a sea of dry ice surrounded by life-size dancing dolls wearing masks of terror? One would think. But this Mexican classic is still more entertaining than anything that came out on Hallmark this year.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You can watch \u003cem>Santa Claus\u003c/em> in full below:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/htZqn3vPoJk'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/htZqn3vPoJk'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cstrong>***\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cem>The Magic Christmas Tree\u003c/em> (1964)\u003c/h2>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922466\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922466\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-4.49.30-PM-800x529.png\" alt=\"A young boy of about 12 stands next to Santa Claus and a tinsel-covered tree.\" width=\"800\" height=\"529\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-4.49.30-PM-800x529.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-4.49.30-PM-1020x675.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-4.49.30-PM-160x106.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-4.49.30-PM-768x508.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/Screen-Shot-2022-12-07-at-4.49.30-PM.png 1282w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">A boy, a Santa and a magic Christmas tree. Must be ‘The Magic Tree’!\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Mark is a young boy with the same energy as a middle-aged father of four who works in construction. One day, he makes the fateful decision to go and visit an elderly woman who’s rumored to be a witch. (She’s wearing a grey wig and her cat is named Lucifer, so … foregone conclusion.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>After falling down and hitting his head, Mark wakes up and the world is suddenly in color, \u003cem>Wizard of Oz\u003c/em>-style. The witch gives him a magic ring with a seed inside it that enables Mark to grow a magic tree that will grant him three wishes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One night, Mark’s entire family leaves him unattended (because: 1960s), so he goes outside and has a chat with the sexually ambiguous talking tree that sprang up moments after he planted it. Soon, Mark acquires magic powers that he uses out on the street for hijinks and chaos. (Weirdly, some of the people involved in said chaos appear to be driving the ice cream bunny’s giant red car. Coincidence?) Then Mark makes Santa Claus come over and bogarts him, preventing him from visiting other kids’ houses for the rest of the night. This, for some reason, really aggravates a giant. (And no, it doesn’t make any sense in the movie either…)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>There are consequences, lessons and probably a mild concussion involved — which contributes to the feeling of being hit over the head repeatedly while watching it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you get all the way through this one, you probably deserve three wishes of your own:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/jkkkONKOPxg'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/jkkkONKOPxg'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Merry Christmas, weirdos!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"title": "New Flavors, New Beginnings at La Cocina's Holiday Market",
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"content": "\u003cp>Tiffany Carter’s journey started on the literal streets of San Francisco. Having grown up in Bayview, she began slinging gumbo in jars out of the trunk of her Honda Civic when she was in her early 20s. From Lakeview to Fillmore, she’d serve up customers who ordered by calling, texting, or finding her on Facebook.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Since joining the Mission-based, woman-owned incubator La Cocina in 2018, the 40-year-old chef and mother has been able to expand her soul-food business, \u003ca href=\"https://bougcali.com/\">Boug Cali\u003c/a>. After initially operating out of her mom’s tiny, outdated Bayview kitchen, Carter now serves her dishes at Chase Center. She also has a stall at La Cocina’s Municipal Market, the first food hall in the country led by mothers, and even employs her own daughter, a 22-year-old graduate of San Jose State University, in a part-time role.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It’s the sort of hustle that Carter’s proud of as a born-and-raised San Franciscan—and one that embodies La Cocina’s larger mission. “I hope that I am a symbol of hope for other mothers, entrepreneurs, Black women, and minorities,” she tells KQED.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922401\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview-800x533.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922401\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview-800x533.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview-1536x1024.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">A scene from 2021’s holiday market at La Cocina’s Municipal Marketplace in San Francisco. \u003ccite>(Erin Ng)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>That dedication will be on full display at La Cocina’s Holiday Market fundraiser on Saturday, Dec. 10, featuring Boug Cali alongside six other businesses. A trademark variety of authentic foods, drinks, cultures and crafts will be served at La Cocina’s indoor space in the Tenderloin; highlights include Los Cilantro’s pozole rojo—the traditional Mexican red chile broth with pork and hominy—and Kayma’s coca, an Algerian puff pastry filled with simmered ground beef, onions, and tomatoes. \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We really want highly motivated individuals with a vibrant spirit and a food product that isn’t only unique, but an extension of themselves,” says La Cocina’s Michelle Magat, about the businesses they work to support. “Tiffany is that. [Her business is] a reflection of her life.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside link1='https://youtu.be/YKboUhMQwC4,Watch: Exploring the First Women-Led Food Hall in the Country' hero='https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/TiffanyCarter.Cecilia.jpg' heroURL='https://youtu.be/YKboUhMQwC4']At this year’s Holiday Market, Carter will serve her signature plates of West Coast-influenced soul food—such as California-style crispy tacos (Creole-seasoned ground beef served on a fried corn tortilla with red beans as a side), chicken and andouille sausage gumbo (made from her Alabama family’s recipe, with the option of blackened Bay lobster), and the Bonfire wrap (a choice of jerk chicken, crispy shrimp or crispy avocado with Baja sauce, pico de gallo, jalapeños, Jack cheese and mixed greens rolled into a flour tortilla).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In addition, the Market will welcome an array of holiday craft vendors, as well as Fluid Cooperative Cafe—a trans-owned and staffed coffee and pastry business.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Our organization is just a bridge for systemically undervalued and under resourced communities to reach their full power,” Magat says. “It’s a big risk to [start a new business in San Francisco]. It really is a journey. We’re in communication with them since day one. That’s how the world should work.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2017/03/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"39\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-12904247\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/03/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg 400w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/03/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39-160x16.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/03/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39-240x23.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/03/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39-375x37.jpg 375w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>La Cocina’s Holiday Market takes place on Saturday, Dec. 10, from 11 a.m.–4 p.m. at the Municipal Marketplace in San Francisco. Admission is free; donations encouraged. \u003ca href=\"https://lacocinasf.org/holidaymarket22\">Details here\u003c/a>. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Tiffany Carter’s journey started on the literal streets of San Francisco. Having grown up in Bayview, she began slinging gumbo in jars out of the trunk of her Honda Civic when she was in her early 20s. From Lakeview to Fillmore, she’d serve up customers who ordered by calling, texting, or finding her on Facebook.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Since joining the Mission-based, woman-owned incubator La Cocina in 2018, the 40-year-old chef and mother has been able to expand her soul-food business, \u003ca href=\"https://bougcali.com/\">Boug Cali\u003c/a>. After initially operating out of her mom’s tiny, outdated Bayview kitchen, Carter now serves her dishes at Chase Center. She also has a stall at La Cocina’s Municipal Market, the first food hall in the country led by mothers, and even employs her own daughter, a 22-year-old graduate of San Jose State University, in a part-time role.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It’s the sort of hustle that Carter’s proud of as a born-and-raised San Franciscan—and one that embodies La Cocina’s larger mission. “I hope that I am a symbol of hope for other mothers, entrepreneurs, Black women, and minorities,” she tells KQED.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922401\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview-800x533.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922401\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview-800x533.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview-1536x1024.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/12/LaCocinaHolidayOverview.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">A scene from 2021’s holiday market at La Cocina’s Municipal Marketplace in San Francisco. \u003ccite>(Erin Ng)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>That dedication will be on full display at La Cocina’s Holiday Market fundraiser on Saturday, Dec. 10, featuring Boug Cali alongside six other businesses. A trademark variety of authentic foods, drinks, cultures and crafts will be served at La Cocina’s indoor space in the Tenderloin; highlights include Los Cilantro’s pozole rojo—the traditional Mexican red chile broth with pork and hominy—and Kayma’s coca, an Algerian puff pastry filled with simmered ground beef, onions, and tomatoes. \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We really want highly motivated individuals with a vibrant spirit and a food product that isn’t only unique, but an extension of themselves,” says La Cocina’s Michelle Magat, about the businesses they work to support. “Tiffany is that. [Her business is] a reflection of her life.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>At this year’s Holiday Market, Carter will serve her signature plates of West Coast-influenced soul food—such as California-style crispy tacos (Creole-seasoned ground beef served on a fried corn tortilla with red beans as a side), chicken and andouille sausage gumbo (made from her Alabama family’s recipe, with the option of blackened Bay lobster), and the Bonfire wrap (a choice of jerk chicken, crispy shrimp or crispy avocado with Baja sauce, pico de gallo, jalapeños, Jack cheese and mixed greens rolled into a flour tortilla).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In addition, the Market will welcome an array of holiday craft vendors, as well as Fluid Cooperative Cafe—a trans-owned and staffed coffee and pastry business.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Our organization is just a bridge for systemically undervalued and under resourced communities to reach their full power,” Magat says. “It’s a big risk to [start a new business in San Francisco]. It really is a journey. We’re in communication with them since day one. That’s how the world should work.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2017/03/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"39\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-12904247\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/03/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg 400w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/03/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39-160x16.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/03/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39-240x23.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/03/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39-375x37.jpg 375w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>La Cocina’s Holiday Market takes place on Saturday, Dec. 10, from 11 a.m.–4 p.m. at the Municipal Marketplace in San Francisco. Admission is free; donations encouraged. \u003ca href=\"https://lacocinasf.org/holidaymarket22\">Details here\u003c/a>. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"slug": "dolly-partons-mountain-magic-christmas-special-nbc-miley-billy-ray-cyrus",
"title": "‘Dolly Parton’s Mountain Magic Christmas’ Is Here to Melt Your Brain",
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"headTitle": "‘Dolly Parton’s Mountain Magic Christmas’ Is Here to Melt Your Brain | KQED",
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"content": "\u003cp>Oh look, it’s Dec. 1! That can mean only one thing! We have officially reached that special point in the year when Dolly Parton bestows upon us a preposterous Christmas movie. Her latest, \u003cem>Dolly Parton’s Mountain Magic Christmas\u003c/em> is even weirder than usual — significantly weirder than this trailer suggests, in fact.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ooOAxj7mK84\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I’m going to break this thing down for you minute-by-minute (spoilers are coming), so get ready. This movie mashes together fiction, a TV special, supernatural country stars, sections where Dolly breaks the fourth wall to share lessons that aren’t really lessons, one entire dance routine that happens inside her mind, and more stilted dialog than a ’70s porno.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let’s do this!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>2:53: Dolly plays a show in Tahoe and is caught completely off guard when it starts snowing in a region of the country that’s known for its skiing. K.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922015\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922015\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-800x528.png\" alt=\"Dolly Parton, with a look of complete astonishment on her face.\" width=\"800\" height=\"528\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-800x528.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-1020x673.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-160x106.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-768x507.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-1536x1013.png 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-1920x1267.png 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface.png 2046w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">It’s not the apocalypse, Dolly. Calm down. \u003ccite>(NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>3:10: Driven into a frenzy by the sight of snow, Dolly decides on the spot that she simply must do a TV special “to bring that mountain magic to everyone this Christmas.” She calls a TV producer named Sam to share this suggestion and wakes him up in the middle of the night. Sam immediately turns on a light, grins, gets up and starts shamelessly kissing Dolly’s ass. This is 100% the appropriate response to a middle-of-the-night phone call from Dolly Parton.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>4:00: It is expressly stated repeatedly that Dolly wants to film the special at Dollywood and broadcast it on NBC. Oh crap. This whole movie is going to be a really long commercial for Dollywood and NBC isn’t it?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>4:48: Opening credits roll, featuring Dolly sitting in a meadow, singing a song, surrounded by sunflowers. I presume this is exactly where she wakes up every morning, flawless from the dawn sunlight and surrounded by talking squirrels.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>6:26: Ana Gasteyer is in this as an NBC employee named Susan. Susan wants Dolly’s TV special to be a live event, but does little else for the rest of this movie. What a waste of Ana Gasteyer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922017\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922017\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_13626-800x534.jpg\" alt=\"A middle aged white woman with long dark blonde hair, speaking on the telephone at an office desk.\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_13626-800x534.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_13626-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_13626-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_13626.jpg 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Ana Gasteyer in a role that in no way allows her to be funny. What is the meaning of this? Aside from squeezing that NBC logo into the background, I mean. \u003ccite>(Katherine Bomboy/NBC)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>8:35: Dolly is in Dollywood’s main square wearing a dress that I recognize from her 2020 movie, \u003cem>Christmas on the Square\u003c/em>. (Thrifty!) Dolly is surrounded by unfeasibly happy people waving large candy canes and what can only be described as excessive wreaths. This initially appears to be a regular-ass musical scene, but then…\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>8:40: Dolly starts shouting “Go tell it!” and “Spread the word!” and the assembled crowds automatically repeat everything she says, in unison. Is Dollywood housing a cult? Has anyone looked into this? Someone should look into this.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>8:47: Dolly yells “Jesus Christ is born!” and everyone in the square magically knows to respond: “Hallelujah! He is born!” Okay, now I’m scared.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>9:01: Dolly starts singing “Go Tell It on the Mountain,” and everyone in the vicinity starts line dancing. These people include: the candy cane and wreath people, cowboys and cowgirls flinging each other around, 1950s sock hop petticoat folks, casual bystanders and — oh but \u003cem>of course\u003c/em> — Mary and Joseph impersonators. (Mary’s a ballerina, naturally.) I went to a wedding in Bastrop, Texas once that was actually a lot like this.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922034\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922034\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_07850-800x534.jpg\" alt=\"An eclectic mix of people dance in a town square while large crowds watch on from behind.\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_07850-800x534.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_07850-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_07850-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_07850.jpg 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Cult members? Jury’s still out. \u003ccite>(Katherine Bomboy/NBC)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>11:09: Dolly sings “He’s alive and I’m forgiven / Heaven’s gates are open wide!” Dollywood is definitely housing a cult.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>13:33: It’s now “the morning of the live show” and everyone is talking to Dolly like she’s a maniac who might kick them in the crotch if they stop working compliments about her into every single sentence. Why is everyone so scared of Dolly Parton? Is this an Ellen situation? Someone should look into this too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='arts_13889581']14:27: NBC decides it simply must work the Rockettes into this movie somehow, so invents a flimsy side plot where the show’s choreographer ditches Dolly to go work with the kicky dance troupe at the last minute. Hey NBC, we know you’ve got Radio City Music Hall tickets to sell and everything, but LITERALLY NOBODY THINKS THE ROCKETTES ARE COOLER THAN DOLLY PARTON. This would never happen.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>15:39: Jimmy Fallon is in this because NBC is determined to ruin this entire movie.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>15:43: Jimmy Fallon is wearing a leather jacket with “JIMMY FALLON” bedazzled on the back of it. He is doing an impersonation of \u003cem>Grease\u003c/em>’s Danny Zuko with all the skill of your drunk cousin at a wedding. There is a good chance, I now realize, that I might keel over and die from watching this movie.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>16:35: Dolly and Jimmy begin singing “It’s Almost Too Early for Christmas” at a Dollywood diner lunch table. It’s supposed to be live and spur of the moment. So either Jimmy Fallon’s voice naturally comes out aggressively auto-tuned, or he’s a robot now. Which actually would go some way to explaining his dance moves.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922016\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922016\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy-800x516.png\" alt=\"Dolly Parton in a tight red and black that's tied at the waist. Jimmy Fallon in a leather jacket. They are dancing inside a diner. \" width=\"800\" height=\"516\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy-800x516.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy-1020x658.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy-160x103.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy-768x496.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy-1536x991.png 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy.png 1782w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Dolly Parton and Jimmy Fallon: All of the chemistry of your new boyfriend trying to dance with your reluctant mom. \u003ccite>(NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>17:30: Someone must’ve recognized this dance number wasn’t really working, so two much younger, zippier people have been subbed in wearing the same outfits as Dolly and Jimmy, to pretend to be them. The camera is not moving quickly enough to disguise the fact that the people dancing are definitely not Jimmy Fallon and Dolly Parton. This is … terrible. Just really, really quantifiably terrible.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>19:34: Jimmy Fallon asks Dolly: “Why do you look as troubled as a tap dancer with a piece of corn in their shoe? Sorry. These mountains bring out the folksy similes in me.” Is this supposed to be funny? I don’t think this is supposed to be funny. But if it’s not supposed to be funny … what even is it?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>20:22: Dolly remembers this movie is actually a Dollywood infomercial and slips this dialog in: “Everything in this park is about my life. We’ve even got the old cabin I grew up in, we’ve got the church I went to, there’s even that old grist mill we used to play in.” What the hell is a grist mill?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>20:27: Dolly, suddenly wearing an entirely different outfit, is now at the grist mill (*shrugs*), and walks inside looking wistful. Gold magic dust swirls in the center of the room and Willie Nelson appears. Because anytime \u003cem>anyone\u003c/em> feels wistful in the vicinity of a mill, Willie Nelson teleports in, clutching a guitar.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>20:56: Willie Nelson is wearing a headband with his own name on it, lest someone on the planet still doesn’t know who Willie Nelson is.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922018\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922018\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie-800x558.png\" alt=\"A senior man with long gray hair braided over his shoulders, wearing a red headband with the words Willie Nelson on it.\" width=\"800\" height=\"558\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie-800x558.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie-1020x711.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie-160x112.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie-768x535.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie-1536x1070.png 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie.png 1808w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">You’ve been alive literally longer than most people on the planet. We know who you are, Willie Nelson. \u003ccite>(NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>21:57: Dolly and Willie sing “Pretty Paper.” It is so genuinely delightful, I almost forget about the Jimmy Fallon atrocity we just witnessed. (\u003cem>Almost\u003c/em>. Realistically, it may never leave me.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='pop_14182']26:07: Over a quarter into this movie and Dolly has \u003cem>just\u003c/em> decided to break the fourth wall for the first time, totally out of the blue. She wants the audience to know that “everyone is a kid at Christmas.” And that’s about it. Why was it necessary to dedicate an entire aside to this? This movie is completely bananas.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>27:16: Producers are bickering over the opening number for the TV special and Dolly doesn’t like it. “All that anger and cussing. That ain’t nothin’ but the devil’s doings,” she says. “We’re trying to lift people up and Satan is trying to tear us down.” (Please let there be a twist where Jimmy Fallon is Satan, please let there be a twist where Jimmy Fallon is Satan…)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>29:09: Dolly breaks out into a choreographed rendition of “Go to Hell” that is neither part of the fictional plot, \u003cem>nor\u003c/em> the TV special within the movie. So it’s happening … inside her head? Whoever wrote this movie was on drugs. A lot of super religious drugs.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922019\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922019\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Go-to-Hell-800x534.jpg\" alt=\"Dolly Parton, wearing a red sequined jumpsuit sings, arms raised, surrounded by dancers dressed in gospel choir garb.\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Go-to-Hell-800x534.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Go-to-Hell-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Go-to-Hell-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Go-to-Hell.jpg 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">This movie is very, very biblical in a super weird way. \u003ccite>(Katherine Bomboy/NBC)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>29:38: A smug-looking man in a suit arrives halfway through “Go to Hell”, as a representation of Satan himself. But get this: He looks \u003cem>exactly\u003c/em> like Tom Cruise. That’s right! Dolly is trolling Scientologists! Somewhere, off in the distance, \u003ca href=\"https://www.aetv.com/shows/leah-remini-scientology-and-the-aftermath\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Leah Remini\u003c/a> is rhythmically \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1g8sPWiKw-4\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">rubbing her acrylic nails together\u003c/a> in appreciation.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>33:59: Shameless plug for Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library which has given away 200 million books to kids who really need them. I am genuinely grateful for this reminder that Dolly Parton is really good at things that aren’t Christmas specials.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>35:03: Dolly Parton is playing the banjo.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>36:03: Dolly Parton is playing a bedazzled acoustic guitar.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>37:48: Dolly Parton has been trying to work in her real-life “grand-nephew Liam” into this plot for the last 40 minutes and Jesus Christ, the things our families make us do.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922020\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922020\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_23008-800x534.jpg\" alt=\"A cute 6 or 7 year old blonde boy, looks off into the distance smiling. He is wearing a red sweatshirt and white and green checked overalls.\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_23008-800x534.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_23008-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_23008-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_23008.jpg 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Liam: No teeth, no real reason to be in this movie. \u003ccite>(Katherine Bomboy/NBC)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>38:16: Dolly is talking directly to the camera again to tell us that Liam is “a special little boy” who is going to “grow up to be something special.” STOP TRYING TO BREAK LIAM INTO SHOW BUSINESS, DOLLY.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>38:50: Dolly is singing a feverish rendition of “Whoever You Are, Be That.” (Basically “Born This Way” for country people.) You can practically hear grandparents across the country slowly getting up from their armchairs and excusing themselves to the bathroom to get away from this.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>42:15: Dolly is breaking the fourth wall. \u003cem>Again\u003c/em>. This time just to introduce “The Seeker,” which she sings in her dressing room. Is this part of the TV special within the movie? Personal downtime? This movie has entirely forgotten what it is supposed to be doing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>45:12: Dolly is talking to God. She seems to think he’s in the light fixtures.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>46:29: With zero segue from the Very Earnest God Song we just heard, Dolly is now dressed as (I’m not lying) a reindeer and singing with Jimmie Allen. (Please note, non-country fans, that Jimmie Allen is not, in fact, a Jimmy Fallon comedy persona. And let’s all thank our lucky stars for that.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922021\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922021\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/My-antlers-are-up-here-800x541.png\" alt=\"Dolly Parton dressed as a reindeer and Jimmie Allen in a fringed brown suede jacket and matching wide brimmed hat.\" width=\"800\" height=\"541\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">“Hey man, my antlers are up here!” \u003ccite>(NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>46:35: There are reindeer ladies playing air guitar in the background of this scene and, dear god, this is worse than \u003cem>Cats\u003c/em>. And that had James Corden in it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>48:27: Producer Sam refers to a female coworker as “that shy little thing” to her face and she responds to this HR violation by unceremoniously announcing that she grew up in miserable foster homes. What?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>50:45: Dolly goes to the train station to ponder the direction of the TV special. (If only someone had done something similar before this movie was made.) A magic steam train shows up carrying Billy Ray Cyrus because, sure, why not.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Billy Ray has the face of Barry Gibb and the ombré hairstyle of Jennifer Aniston in Season 8 of \u003cem>Friends\u003c/em>. It is genuinely mesmerizing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922050\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922050\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-800x247.jpg\" alt=\"A photo of Barry Gibb, a plus sign, a photo of Jennifer Aniston, an equals sign, a screenshot of Billy Ray Cyrus.\" width=\"800\" height=\"247\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-800x247.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-1020x315.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-160x49.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-768x237.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-1536x475.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-2048x633.jpg 2048w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-1920x594.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Tell me you don’t see it. \u003ccite>(Getty Images and Ron Galella / 'Friends' / NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>51:40: Billy Ray and Dolly start singing at each other. I’m realizing that up until this moment, I have managed to live my whole entire life without ever knowingly listening to a Billy Ray Cyrus song that wasn’t “Achy Breaky Heart.” I feel duped. \u003cem>Duped!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>54:38: Plot twist! Turns out that Billy Ray Cyrus is invisible to everyone except for Dolly Parton. If only this were reality.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>56:26: Dolly and Miley Cyrus conduct a completely normal conversation about Dollywood roller coasters, just in case we haven’t considered visiting Dollywood in the last 10 minutes. Then they get up and sing a heartfelt ballad about Christmas. If you turn the sound off, they look like speakers at a sketchy sales convention.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922025\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922025\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Miley-800x559.png\" alt=\"Dolly Parton and Miley Cyrus both wearing formal black and white dresses stand before a Christmas tree.\" width=\"800\" height=\"559\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Miley-800x559.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Miley-1020x712.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Miley-160x112.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Miley-768x536.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Miley.png 1458w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Dolly and Miley looking like a mother-daughter team trying to get you involved in a pyramid scheme. \u003ccite>(NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>1:01:34: Zach Williams shows up and Dolly explains that her TV special isn’t going quite as she imagined. (SAME, DOLLY. SAME.) Zach decides this calls for a talk about — what else? — Jesus.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Please now enjoy one of Zach and Dolly’s very natural exchanges.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='arts_13889748']Dolly: “Zach Williams, don’t tell me you’re another one of those wise mountain men I’m going to see today.”\u003cbr>\nZach: “Well, I don’t know how wise I am, but I do know a wiser man than both of us and he’s telling me you can use a friend.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>JESUS CALLED ZACH WILLIAMS TO TALK ABOUT DOLLY PARTON, YOU GUYS. WHAT A GOSSIP.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:03:02: Zach and Dolly sing “There Was Jesus” and it’s actually kind of a banger.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:05:53: Dolly keeps working the term “wise men” into the conversation and I’m only now getting the fact that Willie, Billy and Zach are supposed to represent the Three Wise Men in this mess of a movie. Jesus literal Christ.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:06:27: Dolly brings out her sisters Cassie and Rachel to sing with her because she is contractually obliged to do this every few years. If you don’t believe me, just watch this crowded cabin of backcombed hair and shiny lace from the 1980s:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Em8tdr2UBQ0\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:07:32 The following exchange just happened:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dolly: “You know, I think I love snow so much because I was born in a big old snowstorm.”\u003cbr>\nCassie: “Daddy had to ride down and bring up Dr. Thomas to deliver you. We paid for you with a sack of cornmeal.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We paid for you with a sack of cornmeal” is going to be my go-to insult for the entirety of 2023.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='arts_13921477']1:08:06: Dolly and her sisters are now singing a confounding song called “\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NrSBY_mCO9g\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">E-Shay As-Way, Eye-May, Est-Bay, End-Fray\u003c/a>” and I am fairly certain my brain just shattered into a million pieces.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:09:46: Thirteen more members of the Parton family (that apparently don’t warrant formal introductions) have arrived to sing a song about how crappy they all are to one another. This song contains lyrics like, “When it’s family, you forgive them, for they know not what they do / When it’s family, you accept them, ‘cause you have no choice but to.” If this is the nicest they can be about each other in public, on television, at Christmas, I would hate to hear their Thanksgiving dinner conversation.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:15:03: Ana Gasteyer just showed back up to remind everyone that this is a Dollywood infomercial. “You know, it’s Dollywood,” she says. “The minute I walked through those gates, all my burdens just disappeared.” I am very tired now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:16:52: Sam asks Dolly “How’s my beautiful girl?” Why has no one at NBC HR ever had words with this man?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/13918217/snl-sexual-assault-horatio-sanz-jimmy-fallon-lorne-michaels-tracy-morgan-saturday\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Oh, wait. That’s right…\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922026\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922026\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-800x471.png\" alt=\"A screenshot of a KQED Arts article titled 'At SNL, Allegations of Sexual Assault During Its Golden Era for Women.\" width=\"800\" height=\"471\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-800x471.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-1020x601.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-160x94.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-768x452.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-1536x904.png 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-2048x1206.png 2048w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-1920x1131.png 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Nothing to see here.\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>1:19:40: I can sense the movie is winding down now because Dolly is talking directly to the camera again. “I hope I haven’t crammed God or Jesus down anybody’s throat,” she says, knowing full well that she has. “I hated that when it happened to me, but it is the season.” Sure, Dolly, okay.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:20:12: “Now I believe the kingdom of heaven is within, and God is good and God is love,” Dolly says. WE LITERALLY JUST TALKED ABOUT THIS, DOLLY.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:22:37: Dolly closes the TV special within the TV special with “Life Is Good Again,” which is a good song. Sexual harassment specialist Sam watches the performance from the side of the stage with a facial expression that is best described as “sad-thirsty.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then everyone goes outside to stand and sing in the snow.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922027\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922027\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/theater-scene-800x597.png\" alt=\"Dolly Parton stands under the marquee of the Palace Theater at Dollywood, surrounded by audiences members.\" width=\"800\" height=\"597\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Why finish a show on the stage indoors, when there is snow and inconvenience outside? \u003ccite>(NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>The End.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Might we suggest that Dolly’s Christmas special next year just be a simple duets format? Please? Pretty please? With tinsel on top?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-12127869\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-800x78.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"78\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg 400w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-768x75.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>‘Dolly Parton’s Mountain Magic Christmas’ premieres on Dec. 1 at 8 p.m. on NBC, and is available to stream on Peacock from Dec. 2.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"title": "‘Dolly Parton’s Magic Mountain Christmas’ By-The-Minute Analysis | KQED",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Oh look, it’s Dec. 1! That can mean only one thing! We have officially reached that special point in the year when Dolly Parton bestows upon us a preposterous Christmas movie. Her latest, \u003cem>Dolly Parton’s Mountain Magic Christmas\u003c/em> is even weirder than usual — significantly weirder than this trailer suggests, in fact.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/ooOAxj7mK84'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/ooOAxj7mK84'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>I’m going to break this thing down for you minute-by-minute (spoilers are coming), so get ready. This movie mashes together fiction, a TV special, supernatural country stars, sections where Dolly breaks the fourth wall to share lessons that aren’t really lessons, one entire dance routine that happens inside her mind, and more stilted dialog than a ’70s porno.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let’s do this!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>2:53: Dolly plays a show in Tahoe and is caught completely off guard when it starts snowing in a region of the country that’s known for its skiing. K.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922015\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922015\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-800x528.png\" alt=\"Dolly Parton, with a look of complete astonishment on her face.\" width=\"800\" height=\"528\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-800x528.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-1020x673.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-160x106.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-768x507.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-1536x1013.png 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface-1920x1267.png 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/dollface.png 2046w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">It’s not the apocalypse, Dolly. Calm down. \u003ccite>(NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>3:10: Driven into a frenzy by the sight of snow, Dolly decides on the spot that she simply must do a TV special “to bring that mountain magic to everyone this Christmas.” She calls a TV producer named Sam to share this suggestion and wakes him up in the middle of the night. Sam immediately turns on a light, grins, gets up and starts shamelessly kissing Dolly’s ass. This is 100% the appropriate response to a middle-of-the-night phone call from Dolly Parton.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>4:00: It is expressly stated repeatedly that Dolly wants to film the special at Dollywood and broadcast it on NBC. Oh crap. This whole movie is going to be a really long commercial for Dollywood and NBC isn’t it?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>4:48: Opening credits roll, featuring Dolly sitting in a meadow, singing a song, surrounded by sunflowers. I presume this is exactly where she wakes up every morning, flawless from the dawn sunlight and surrounded by talking squirrels.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>6:26: Ana Gasteyer is in this as an NBC employee named Susan. Susan wants Dolly’s TV special to be a live event, but does little else for the rest of this movie. What a waste of Ana Gasteyer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922017\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922017\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_13626-800x534.jpg\" alt=\"A middle aged white woman with long dark blonde hair, speaking on the telephone at an office desk.\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_13626-800x534.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_13626-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_13626-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_13626.jpg 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Ana Gasteyer in a role that in no way allows her to be funny. What is the meaning of this? Aside from squeezing that NBC logo into the background, I mean. \u003ccite>(Katherine Bomboy/NBC)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>8:35: Dolly is in Dollywood’s main square wearing a dress that I recognize from her 2020 movie, \u003cem>Christmas on the Square\u003c/em>. (Thrifty!) Dolly is surrounded by unfeasibly happy people waving large candy canes and what can only be described as excessive wreaths. This initially appears to be a regular-ass musical scene, but then…\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>8:40: Dolly starts shouting “Go tell it!” and “Spread the word!” and the assembled crowds automatically repeat everything she says, in unison. Is Dollywood housing a cult? Has anyone looked into this? Someone should look into this.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>8:47: Dolly yells “Jesus Christ is born!” and everyone in the square magically knows to respond: “Hallelujah! He is born!” Okay, now I’m scared.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>9:01: Dolly starts singing “Go Tell It on the Mountain,” and everyone in the vicinity starts line dancing. These people include: the candy cane and wreath people, cowboys and cowgirls flinging each other around, 1950s sock hop petticoat folks, casual bystanders and — oh but \u003cem>of course\u003c/em> — Mary and Joseph impersonators. (Mary’s a ballerina, naturally.) I went to a wedding in Bastrop, Texas once that was actually a lot like this.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922034\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922034\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_07850-800x534.jpg\" alt=\"An eclectic mix of people dance in a town square while large crowds watch on from behind.\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_07850-800x534.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_07850-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_07850-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_07850.jpg 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Cult members? Jury’s still out. \u003ccite>(Katherine Bomboy/NBC)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>11:09: Dolly sings “He’s alive and I’m forgiven / Heaven’s gates are open wide!” Dollywood is definitely housing a cult.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>13:33: It’s now “the morning of the live show” and everyone is talking to Dolly like she’s a maniac who might kick them in the crotch if they stop working compliments about her into every single sentence. Why is everyone so scared of Dolly Parton? Is this an Ellen situation? Someone should look into this too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>14:27: NBC decides it simply must work the Rockettes into this movie somehow, so invents a flimsy side plot where the show’s choreographer ditches Dolly to go work with the kicky dance troupe at the last minute. Hey NBC, we know you’ve got Radio City Music Hall tickets to sell and everything, but LITERALLY NOBODY THINKS THE ROCKETTES ARE COOLER THAN DOLLY PARTON. This would never happen.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>15:39: Jimmy Fallon is in this because NBC is determined to ruin this entire movie.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>15:43: Jimmy Fallon is wearing a leather jacket with “JIMMY FALLON” bedazzled on the back of it. He is doing an impersonation of \u003cem>Grease\u003c/em>’s Danny Zuko with all the skill of your drunk cousin at a wedding. There is a good chance, I now realize, that I might keel over and die from watching this movie.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>16:35: Dolly and Jimmy begin singing “It’s Almost Too Early for Christmas” at a Dollywood diner lunch table. It’s supposed to be live and spur of the moment. So either Jimmy Fallon’s voice naturally comes out aggressively auto-tuned, or he’s a robot now. Which actually would go some way to explaining his dance moves.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922016\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922016\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy-800x516.png\" alt=\"Dolly Parton in a tight red and black that's tied at the waist. Jimmy Fallon in a leather jacket. They are dancing inside a diner. \" width=\"800\" height=\"516\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy-800x516.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy-1020x658.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy-160x103.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy-768x496.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy-1536x991.png 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Jimmy.png 1782w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Dolly Parton and Jimmy Fallon: All of the chemistry of your new boyfriend trying to dance with your reluctant mom. \u003ccite>(NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>17:30: Someone must’ve recognized this dance number wasn’t really working, so two much younger, zippier people have been subbed in wearing the same outfits as Dolly and Jimmy, to pretend to be them. The camera is not moving quickly enough to disguise the fact that the people dancing are definitely not Jimmy Fallon and Dolly Parton. This is … terrible. Just really, really quantifiably terrible.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>19:34: Jimmy Fallon asks Dolly: “Why do you look as troubled as a tap dancer with a piece of corn in their shoe? Sorry. These mountains bring out the folksy similes in me.” Is this supposed to be funny? I don’t think this is supposed to be funny. But if it’s not supposed to be funny … what even is it?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>20:22: Dolly remembers this movie is actually a Dollywood infomercial and slips this dialog in: “Everything in this park is about my life. We’ve even got the old cabin I grew up in, we’ve got the church I went to, there’s even that old grist mill we used to play in.” What the hell is a grist mill?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>20:27: Dolly, suddenly wearing an entirely different outfit, is now at the grist mill (*shrugs*), and walks inside looking wistful. Gold magic dust swirls in the center of the room and Willie Nelson appears. Because anytime \u003cem>anyone\u003c/em> feels wistful in the vicinity of a mill, Willie Nelson teleports in, clutching a guitar.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>20:56: Willie Nelson is wearing a headband with his own name on it, lest someone on the planet still doesn’t know who Willie Nelson is.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922018\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922018\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie-800x558.png\" alt=\"A senior man with long gray hair braided over his shoulders, wearing a red headband with the words Willie Nelson on it.\" width=\"800\" height=\"558\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie-800x558.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie-1020x711.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie-160x112.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie-768x535.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie-1536x1070.png 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/willie.png 1808w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">You’ve been alive literally longer than most people on the planet. We know who you are, Willie Nelson. \u003ccite>(NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>21:57: Dolly and Willie sing “Pretty Paper.” It is so genuinely delightful, I almost forget about the Jimmy Fallon atrocity we just witnessed. (\u003cem>Almost\u003c/em>. Realistically, it may never leave me.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>26:07: Over a quarter into this movie and Dolly has \u003cem>just\u003c/em> decided to break the fourth wall for the first time, totally out of the blue. She wants the audience to know that “everyone is a kid at Christmas.” And that’s about it. Why was it necessary to dedicate an entire aside to this? This movie is completely bananas.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>27:16: Producers are bickering over the opening number for the TV special and Dolly doesn’t like it. “All that anger and cussing. That ain’t nothin’ but the devil’s doings,” she says. “We’re trying to lift people up and Satan is trying to tear us down.” (Please let there be a twist where Jimmy Fallon is Satan, please let there be a twist where Jimmy Fallon is Satan…)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>29:09: Dolly breaks out into a choreographed rendition of “Go to Hell” that is neither part of the fictional plot, \u003cem>nor\u003c/em> the TV special within the movie. So it’s happening … inside her head? Whoever wrote this movie was on drugs. A lot of super religious drugs.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922019\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922019\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Go-to-Hell-800x534.jpg\" alt=\"Dolly Parton, wearing a red sequined jumpsuit sings, arms raised, surrounded by dancers dressed in gospel choir garb.\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Go-to-Hell-800x534.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Go-to-Hell-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Go-to-Hell-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Go-to-Hell.jpg 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">This movie is very, very biblical in a super weird way. \u003ccite>(Katherine Bomboy/NBC)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>29:38: A smug-looking man in a suit arrives halfway through “Go to Hell”, as a representation of Satan himself. But get this: He looks \u003cem>exactly\u003c/em> like Tom Cruise. That’s right! Dolly is trolling Scientologists! Somewhere, off in the distance, \u003ca href=\"https://www.aetv.com/shows/leah-remini-scientology-and-the-aftermath\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Leah Remini\u003c/a> is rhythmically \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1g8sPWiKw-4\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">rubbing her acrylic nails together\u003c/a> in appreciation.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>33:59: Shameless plug for Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library which has given away 200 million books to kids who really need them. I am genuinely grateful for this reminder that Dolly Parton is really good at things that aren’t Christmas specials.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>35:03: Dolly Parton is playing the banjo.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>36:03: Dolly Parton is playing a bedazzled acoustic guitar.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>37:48: Dolly Parton has been trying to work in her real-life “grand-nephew Liam” into this plot for the last 40 minutes and Jesus Christ, the things our families make us do.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922020\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922020\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_23008-800x534.jpg\" alt=\"A cute 6 or 7 year old blonde boy, looks off into the distance smiling. He is wearing a red sweatshirt and white and green checked overalls.\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_23008-800x534.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_23008-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_23008-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/NUP_198664_23008.jpg 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Liam: No teeth, no real reason to be in this movie. \u003ccite>(Katherine Bomboy/NBC)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>38:16: Dolly is talking directly to the camera again to tell us that Liam is “a special little boy” who is going to “grow up to be something special.” STOP TRYING TO BREAK LIAM INTO SHOW BUSINESS, DOLLY.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>38:50: Dolly is singing a feverish rendition of “Whoever You Are, Be That.” (Basically “Born This Way” for country people.) You can practically hear grandparents across the country slowly getting up from their armchairs and excusing themselves to the bathroom to get away from this.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>42:15: Dolly is breaking the fourth wall. \u003cem>Again\u003c/em>. This time just to introduce “The Seeker,” which she sings in her dressing room. Is this part of the TV special within the movie? Personal downtime? This movie has entirely forgotten what it is supposed to be doing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>45:12: Dolly is talking to God. She seems to think he’s in the light fixtures.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>46:29: With zero segue from the Very Earnest God Song we just heard, Dolly is now dressed as (I’m not lying) a reindeer and singing with Jimmie Allen. (Please note, non-country fans, that Jimmie Allen is not, in fact, a Jimmy Fallon comedy persona. And let’s all thank our lucky stars for that.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922021\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922021\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/My-antlers-are-up-here-800x541.png\" alt=\"Dolly Parton dressed as a reindeer and Jimmie Allen in a fringed brown suede jacket and matching wide brimmed hat.\" width=\"800\" height=\"541\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">“Hey man, my antlers are up here!” \u003ccite>(NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>46:35: There are reindeer ladies playing air guitar in the background of this scene and, dear god, this is worse than \u003cem>Cats\u003c/em>. And that had James Corden in it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>48:27: Producer Sam refers to a female coworker as “that shy little thing” to her face and she responds to this HR violation by unceremoniously announcing that she grew up in miserable foster homes. What?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>50:45: Dolly goes to the train station to ponder the direction of the TV special. (If only someone had done something similar before this movie was made.) A magic steam train shows up carrying Billy Ray Cyrus because, sure, why not.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Billy Ray has the face of Barry Gibb and the ombré hairstyle of Jennifer Aniston in Season 8 of \u003cem>Friends\u003c/em>. It is genuinely mesmerizing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922050\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922050\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-800x247.jpg\" alt=\"A photo of Barry Gibb, a plus sign, a photo of Jennifer Aniston, an equals sign, a screenshot of Billy Ray Cyrus.\" width=\"800\" height=\"247\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-800x247.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-1020x315.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-160x49.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-768x237.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-1536x475.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-2048x633.jpg 2048w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Billy-Ray-Math-2-1920x594.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Tell me you don’t see it. \u003ccite>(Getty Images and Ron Galella / 'Friends' / NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>51:40: Billy Ray and Dolly start singing at each other. I’m realizing that up until this moment, I have managed to live my whole entire life without ever knowingly listening to a Billy Ray Cyrus song that wasn’t “Achy Breaky Heart.” I feel duped. \u003cem>Duped!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>54:38: Plot twist! Turns out that Billy Ray Cyrus is invisible to everyone except for Dolly Parton. If only this were reality.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>56:26: Dolly and Miley Cyrus conduct a completely normal conversation about Dollywood roller coasters, just in case we haven’t considered visiting Dollywood in the last 10 minutes. Then they get up and sing a heartfelt ballad about Christmas. If you turn the sound off, they look like speakers at a sketchy sales convention.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922025\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922025\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Miley-800x559.png\" alt=\"Dolly Parton and Miley Cyrus both wearing formal black and white dresses stand before a Christmas tree.\" width=\"800\" height=\"559\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Miley-800x559.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Miley-1020x712.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Miley-160x112.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Miley-768x536.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Dolly-and-Miley.png 1458w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Dolly and Miley looking like a mother-daughter team trying to get you involved in a pyramid scheme. \u003ccite>(NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>1:01:34: Zach Williams shows up and Dolly explains that her TV special isn’t going quite as she imagined. (SAME, DOLLY. SAME.) Zach decides this calls for a talk about — what else? — Jesus.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Please now enjoy one of Zach and Dolly’s very natural exchanges.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>Dolly: “Zach Williams, don’t tell me you’re another one of those wise mountain men I’m going to see today.”\u003cbr>\nZach: “Well, I don’t know how wise I am, but I do know a wiser man than both of us and he’s telling me you can use a friend.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>JESUS CALLED ZACH WILLIAMS TO TALK ABOUT DOLLY PARTON, YOU GUYS. WHAT A GOSSIP.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:03:02: Zach and Dolly sing “There Was Jesus” and it’s actually kind of a banger.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:05:53: Dolly keeps working the term “wise men” into the conversation and I’m only now getting the fact that Willie, Billy and Zach are supposed to represent the Three Wise Men in this mess of a movie. Jesus literal Christ.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:06:27: Dolly brings out her sisters Cassie and Rachel to sing with her because she is contractually obliged to do this every few years. If you don’t believe me, just watch this crowded cabin of backcombed hair and shiny lace from the 1980s:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/Em8tdr2UBQ0'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/Em8tdr2UBQ0'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>1:07:32 The following exchange just happened:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dolly: “You know, I think I love snow so much because I was born in a big old snowstorm.”\u003cbr>\nCassie: “Daddy had to ride down and bring up Dr. Thomas to deliver you. We paid for you with a sack of cornmeal.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We paid for you with a sack of cornmeal” is going to be my go-to insult for the entirety of 2023.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>1:08:06: Dolly and her sisters are now singing a confounding song called “\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NrSBY_mCO9g\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">E-Shay As-Way, Eye-May, Est-Bay, End-Fray\u003c/a>” and I am fairly certain my brain just shattered into a million pieces.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:09:46: Thirteen more members of the Parton family (that apparently don’t warrant formal introductions) have arrived to sing a song about how crappy they all are to one another. This song contains lyrics like, “When it’s family, you forgive them, for they know not what they do / When it’s family, you accept them, ‘cause you have no choice but to.” If this is the nicest they can be about each other in public, on television, at Christmas, I would hate to hear their Thanksgiving dinner conversation.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:15:03: Ana Gasteyer just showed back up to remind everyone that this is a Dollywood infomercial. “You know, it’s Dollywood,” she says. “The minute I walked through those gates, all my burdens just disappeared.” I am very tired now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:16:52: Sam asks Dolly “How’s my beautiful girl?” Why has no one at NBC HR ever had words with this man?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/13918217/snl-sexual-assault-horatio-sanz-jimmy-fallon-lorne-michaels-tracy-morgan-saturday\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Oh, wait. That’s right…\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922026\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922026\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-800x471.png\" alt=\"A screenshot of a KQED Arts article titled 'At SNL, Allegations of Sexual Assault During Its Golden Era for Women.\" width=\"800\" height=\"471\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-800x471.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-1020x601.png 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-160x94.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-768x452.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-1536x904.png 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-2048x1206.png 2048w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/Screen-Shot-2022-11-28-at-6.34.17-PM-1920x1131.png 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Nothing to see here.\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>1:19:40: I can sense the movie is winding down now because Dolly is talking directly to the camera again. “I hope I haven’t crammed God or Jesus down anybody’s throat,” she says, knowing full well that she has. “I hated that when it happened to me, but it is the season.” Sure, Dolly, okay.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:20:12: “Now I believe the kingdom of heaven is within, and God is good and God is love,” Dolly says. WE LITERALLY JUST TALKED ABOUT THIS, DOLLY.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>1:22:37: Dolly closes the TV special within the TV special with “Life Is Good Again,” which is a good song. Sexual harassment specialist Sam watches the performance from the side of the stage with a facial expression that is best described as “sad-thirsty.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then everyone goes outside to stand and sing in the snow.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13922027\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13922027\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/theater-scene-800x597.png\" alt=\"Dolly Parton stands under the marquee of the Palace Theater at Dollywood, surrounded by audiences members.\" width=\"800\" height=\"597\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Why finish a show on the stage indoors, when there is snow and inconvenience outside? \u003ccite>(NBC Universal)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>The End.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Might we suggest that Dolly’s Christmas special next year just be a simple duets format? Please? Pretty please? With tinsel on top?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-12127869\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-800x78.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"78\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-400x39.jpg 400w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2016/09/Q.Logo_.Break_-768x75.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>‘Dolly Parton’s Mountain Magic Christmas’ premieres on Dec. 1 at 8 p.m. on NBC, and is available to stream on Peacock from Dec. 2.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cp>Calling all fans of Christmas movie classics: The iconic house from the 1990 film \u003cem>Home Alone \u003c/em>will be available to rent on Airbnb for one night only this holiday season.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Up to four lucky mischief makers will be able to stay in the McCallister family’s house on the night of Dec. 12 for just $25, the \u003ca href=\"https://news.airbnb.com/a-holiday-wish-come-true-the-real-life-home-alone-house-is-now-bookable/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">rental company announced\u003c/a> on Wednesday. Renters can request to \u003ca href=\"https://www.airbnb.com/rooms/53274539?source_impression_id=p3_1638455535_V0sTAi8NhPr4Bike\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">book the suburban Chicago property\u003c/a> beginning Dec. 7 at 1 p.m. CT.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='pop_10304']That’s thanks to elder brother Buzz, aka actor Devin Ratray, who is hosting the stay—even though he and his family (everyone except the pet tarantula, this time) will be out of town on their annual holiday trip.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“You may not remember me as particularly accommodating,” ‘Buzz’ said in a statement. “But I’ve grown up, and I’d be happy to share my family home—my pizza, even—with you this holiday season. Just try not to let my tarantula, Axl, loose this time.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It is not clear who owns the house, or how exactly it made its way to Airbnb. The family who owned the property at the time of filming sold it to the current owners in 2012 for $1.5 million, according to the \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.chicagotribune.com/real-estate/ct-biz-home-alone-house-may5-photogallery.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Chicago Tribune\u003c/a>\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.instagram.com/p/CW8O1u2FLXB/\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While the house is certainly the main attraction, it’s not the only advertised perk of the overnight stay (no Kevin included though, sorry).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://people.com/travel/home-alone-airbnb-devin-ratray-hosting-exclusive/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Ratray told \u003cem>People\u003c/em> that anything fans could possibly remember from the first movie will be available\u003c/a>—short of paint cans in the face. He said he hopes it will be snowing like it was in the film, and is excited about giving fans the opportunity to experience the house for themselves.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='pop_10603']“You’ve seen the movie so many times, you’ve seen the Christmas tree in the front room, you’ve seen the staircase, people running up and down, you’ve seen the kitchen where Buzz lovingly barfed up all the cheese pizza. Now you get to walk through that,” he said, adding that the mess has long since been cleaned up.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Airbnb says it will welcome its guests with a “cozy holiday scene” including twinkling lights and a Christmas tree, as well as a meet-and-greet with a real tarantula, a LEGO set to take home and “all of the ’90s favorites their hearts desire,” from Chicago pizza to a candlelit dinner of microwavable mac and cheese.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It also promises booby traps (“but don’t worry—you’ll be setting them, not sidestepping them!”) and “surprisingly searing splashes of aftershave and ample opportunity to scream into the mirror.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEDaVHmw7r4\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“This holiday season, we’re playing by my little bro’s rules, so feel free to eat junk food, watch rubbish on TV, borrow my dad’s aftershave and choose your own adventure with a legendary battle plan as a guide,” Buzz writes in the property listing. “Just stay out of my room, okay?”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Guests will wrap up their night of hijinks with a screening of the franchise’s latest installment, \u003cem>Home Sweet Home Alone\u003c/em>. The \u003ca href=\"https://www.imdb.com/title/tt11012066/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">new film\u003c/a>, out now on Disney+, follows a married couple trying to steal an heirloom from a resourceful kiddo whose family left him behind on a holiday trip to Japan.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And, like the best presents, this gift also gives: Airbnb says it will make a one-time donation to Chicago’s \u003ca href=\"https://larabida.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">La Rabida Children’s Hospital\u003c/a>, though does not specify the dollar amount.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='pop_97685']The listing describes the 2 bedroom, 1.5 bathroom house as being tucked away on a picturesque street in the Chicago suburb of Winnetka, and calls the neighborhood a friendly one “despite past encounters with crooks and folklore about Old Man Marley.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Airbnb adds that guests are responsible for their own travel to and from Chicago, and those hoping to reserve the home must adhere to local COVID-19 guidelines and company safety practices.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It’s also monitoring local infection rates and mandates as the omicron variant spreads, and says it will offer guests a $1,000 travel credit if the stay ultimately has to be cancelled.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Here’s hoping these lucky renters will be able to safely get—and stay—home alone after all.\u003c/p>\n\u003chr>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This story originally appeared on \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/live-updates/morning-edition-2021-12-02#the-home-alone-house-could-be-yours-for-one-night-only\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">the \u003cem>Morning Edition\u003c/em> live blog\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2021 NPR. To see more, \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">visit NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=The+%27Home+Alone%27+house+could+be+yours+for+a+night+&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>While the house is certainly the main attraction, it’s not the only advertised perk of the overnight stay (no Kevin included though, sorry).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://people.com/travel/home-alone-airbnb-devin-ratray-hosting-exclusive/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Ratray told \u003cem>People\u003c/em> that anything fans could possibly remember from the first movie will be available\u003c/a>—short of paint cans in the face. He said he hopes it will be snowing like it was in the film, and is excited about giving fans the opportunity to experience the house for themselves.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>“You’ve seen the movie so many times, you’ve seen the Christmas tree in the front room, you’ve seen the staircase, people running up and down, you’ve seen the kitchen where Buzz lovingly barfed up all the cheese pizza. Now you get to walk through that,” he said, adding that the mess has long since been cleaned up.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Airbnb says it will welcome its guests with a “cozy holiday scene” including twinkling lights and a Christmas tree, as well as a meet-and-greet with a real tarantula, a LEGO set to take home and “all of the ’90s favorites their hearts desire,” from Chicago pizza to a candlelit dinner of microwavable mac and cheese.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It also promises booby traps (“but don’t worry—you’ll be setting them, not sidestepping them!”) and “surprisingly searing splashes of aftershave and ample opportunity to scream into the mirror.”\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/jEDaVHmw7r4'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/jEDaVHmw7r4'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>“This holiday season, we’re playing by my little bro’s rules, so feel free to eat junk food, watch rubbish on TV, borrow my dad’s aftershave and choose your own adventure with a legendary battle plan as a guide,” Buzz writes in the property listing. “Just stay out of my room, okay?”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Guests will wrap up their night of hijinks with a screening of the franchise’s latest installment, \u003cem>Home Sweet Home Alone\u003c/em>. The \u003ca href=\"https://www.imdb.com/title/tt11012066/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">new film\u003c/a>, out now on Disney+, follows a married couple trying to steal an heirloom from a resourceful kiddo whose family left him behind on a holiday trip to Japan.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And, like the best presents, this gift also gives: Airbnb says it will make a one-time donation to Chicago’s \u003ca href=\"https://larabida.org/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">La Rabida Children’s Hospital\u003c/a>, though does not specify the dollar amount.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>The listing describes the 2 bedroom, 1.5 bathroom house as being tucked away on a picturesque street in the Chicago suburb of Winnetka, and calls the neighborhood a friendly one “despite past encounters with crooks and folklore about Old Man Marley.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Airbnb adds that guests are responsible for their own travel to and from Chicago, and those hoping to reserve the home must adhere to local COVID-19 guidelines and company safety practices.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It’s also monitoring local infection rates and mandates as the omicron variant spreads, and says it will offer guests a $1,000 travel credit if the stay ultimately has to be cancelled.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Here’s hoping these lucky renters will be able to safely get—and stay—home alone after all.\u003c/p>\n\u003chr>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This story originally appeared on \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/live-updates/morning-edition-2021-12-02#the-home-alone-house-could-be-yours-for-one-night-only\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">the \u003cem>Morning Edition\u003c/em> live blog\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2021 NPR. To see more, \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">visit NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=The+%27Home+Alone%27+house+could+be+yours+for+a+night+&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cp>For five years now, they’ve shown up as soon as the holiday lights do. They’re a pair of magical and mysterious Christmas trees, dressed to the nines, who spend every December prancing around the Bay Area, spreading joy and seasonal cheer. This year, they’re at it again (face shields on and sanitizer in hand). And they’re also finally ready to reveal their true identities in an exclusive interview with KQED Arts & Culture via tree-mail, I mean email.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Other news outlets have previously \u003ca href=\"https://www.msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/lifestyle-buzz/meet-the-christmas-tree-twins-who-frolic-around-san-francisco-to-spread-holiday-cheer/ar-BB1btVVK?ocid=hplocalnews\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">reported\u003c/a> that you are a human couple simply wearing tree costumes to spread festive joy. But that’s not true, is it?\u003cbr>\n\u003c/strong>Well, we’ve been pretending to be a couple of guys in costumes, waiting for someone to call our bluff. We’re eager to share the real story behind our annual visits now. People get very nervous when we tell them we’re magical trees sent by Santa, so we’ve spent years pretending to be humans. We’ve learned to do all the human things—talk to dogs, pretend to struggle with our masks, and we have even lost balance and fallen face first onto the grass, just to seem believable!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Why have you kept your true identities as magical beings a secret from the media thus far?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nWhen people ask questions, we always tell the truth first! Everyone says, ‘Okay sure, but what’s the \u003cem>real\u003c/em> answer?’ We asked Santa about this phenomenon and all he said was, ‘Don’t get me started.’\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.instagram.com/p/CIuAkQQBUQD/\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Do you have names, or are you really just called ‘Tree 1’ and ‘Tree 2’?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nCalling ourselves ‘Tree 1’ and ‘Tree 2’ is easier to explain than our real names. Tree language sounds like wind rustling through branches, and Christmas tree language sounds like an angry human struggling with lights. Most people can’t pronounce our real names—there are a lot of tinkling and cracking sounds.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tell us a bit about how magic trees come into the world. Is it common for your species to come in twin sets?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nAll North Pole Christmas trees come from the Christmas Tree Forest. Tree Twins are born when a magic snowstorm happens in that forest. Santa comes into the woods and discovers colorful trees where there had been plain old evergreens before. He hangs a tube of magic glitter lipstick on our branches, and we come to life, ready to dance, twirl and chug alarming quantities of eggnog. I mean, \u003cem>a lot\u003c/em>. Epic amounts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Do you ever communicate with regular Christmas trees? And if so, do they ever seem kind of basic to you?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nRegular Christmas trees tend to roll their eyes and think we’re just showing off, but there would be no holiday without them! We wave and talk to every Christmas tree we find. Some of them are very nice, while others can be grumpy—usually because they are dry and thirsty.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.instagram.com/p/CIzVPqsh4Xx/\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>How do you feel about baubles?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\n(\u003cem>Screaming\u003c/em>) We \u003cem>love\u003c/em> baubles! We stare into every shop that has a decorated tree and wish we could wear them. Whenever we try, they get tangled when we hug. Also, they attract crows, so you have to be careful.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Describe Santa’s forest for us. \u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nSanta’s forest has changed a bit over the years. There used to be a giant eggnog lake, but the new gingerbread dam got soggy really quickly, and when it crumbled we got beautiful rivers of eggnog flowing everywhere! There are many forests. There is a real Christmas tree forest, an artificial Christmas tree forest, a felt tree forest, even a ceramic christmas tree forest! One year, Santa tried a garlic breadstick forest, but that made everyone rush over to the peppermint forest, and now we’re waiting for that to grow back.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What’s the big man like? \u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nSanta is \u003cem>so\u003c/em> wonderful. We follow and chat with him every day. We tell him all about the new friends we made, and the Christmas cookies, and all the dancing and the presents, and how nice everyone is. He always pretends to give a big sigh of relief when he sends us to the city for a month, but we \u003cem>love\u003c/em> him! [aside postid='arts_13890197']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What are parties like in the North Pole? \u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nParties are so much fun! You’d be surprised to learn that reindeer like to stay home and read, and elves are notorious no-shows though. Most parties are a raucous mix of gingerbread people, snowmen, candy canes, fruitcakes (careful—they bite) and nutcrackers. Nutcrackers don’t say much but, \u003cem>wow\u003c/em>, can they eat! We turn up the carols, turn on the twinkly lights, and twirl and spin all night.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.instagram.com/p/B6N1UORBUd9/\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What is it about San Francisco that brings you back here every year?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nThe city is one of the most beautiful places anywhere. People here are so friendly (even though they sometimes need a nudge) and ready to play with us. Santa really wants us to start a Christmas Parade here, and he sends us every year to build support. One day we hope to march down Market Street with an army of festive trees, candy canes, fruitcakes (remember—they bite) and other holiday characters.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What do magic trees do between January and November?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nWe try and get some rest, but it’s difficult. Sugarplums have dance practice, the Christmas puddings are loud talkers and snowmen are a relentless Tupperware sales force. December is peaceful by comparison.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What are your hopes for 2021?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nWe hope for more happiness and peace; we hope for more friendship and kind words between neighbors. And we hope we end 2021 dancing on the video screens at the top of the Salesforce tower!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.instagram.com/p/B6OrTIMBNqv/\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>To find out where the Tree Twins will be popping up next, follow them on \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/treetwins/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Instagram\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/treetwins\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Twitter\u003c/a>. They are scheduled to return to the North Pole on Christmas Eve.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>For five years now, they’ve shown up as soon as the holiday lights do. They’re a pair of magical and mysterious Christmas trees, dressed to the nines, who spend every December prancing around the Bay Area, spreading joy and seasonal cheer. This year, they’re at it again (face shields on and sanitizer in hand). And they’re also finally ready to reveal their true identities in an exclusive interview with KQED Arts & Culture via tree-mail, I mean email.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Other news outlets have previously \u003ca href=\"https://www.msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/lifestyle-buzz/meet-the-christmas-tree-twins-who-frolic-around-san-francisco-to-spread-holiday-cheer/ar-BB1btVVK?ocid=hplocalnews\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">reported\u003c/a> that you are a human couple simply wearing tree costumes to spread festive joy. But that’s not true, is it?\u003cbr>\n\u003c/strong>Well, we’ve been pretending to be a couple of guys in costumes, waiting for someone to call our bluff. We’re eager to share the real story behind our annual visits now. People get very nervous when we tell them we’re magical trees sent by Santa, so we’ve spent years pretending to be humans. We’ve learned to do all the human things—talk to dogs, pretend to struggle with our masks, and we have even lost balance and fallen face first onto the grass, just to seem believable!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Why have you kept your true identities as magical beings a secret from the media thus far?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nWhen people ask questions, we always tell the truth first! Everyone says, ‘Okay sure, but what’s the \u003cem>real\u003c/em> answer?’ We asked Santa about this phenomenon and all he said was, ‘Don’t get me started.’\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Do you have names, or are you really just called ‘Tree 1’ and ‘Tree 2’?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nCalling ourselves ‘Tree 1’ and ‘Tree 2’ is easier to explain than our real names. Tree language sounds like wind rustling through branches, and Christmas tree language sounds like an angry human struggling with lights. Most people can’t pronounce our real names—there are a lot of tinkling and cracking sounds.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tell us a bit about how magic trees come into the world. Is it common for your species to come in twin sets?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nAll North Pole Christmas trees come from the Christmas Tree Forest. Tree Twins are born when a magic snowstorm happens in that forest. Santa comes into the woods and discovers colorful trees where there had been plain old evergreens before. He hangs a tube of magic glitter lipstick on our branches, and we come to life, ready to dance, twirl and chug alarming quantities of eggnog. I mean, \u003cem>a lot\u003c/em>. Epic amounts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Do you ever communicate with regular Christmas trees? And if so, do they ever seem kind of basic to you?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nRegular Christmas trees tend to roll their eyes and think we’re just showing off, but there would be no holiday without them! We wave and talk to every Christmas tree we find. Some of them are very nice, while others can be grumpy—usually because they are dry and thirsty.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cstrong>How do you feel about baubles?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\n(\u003cem>Screaming\u003c/em>) We \u003cem>love\u003c/em> baubles! We stare into every shop that has a decorated tree and wish we could wear them. Whenever we try, they get tangled when we hug. Also, they attract crows, so you have to be careful.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Describe Santa’s forest for us. \u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nSanta’s forest has changed a bit over the years. There used to be a giant eggnog lake, but the new gingerbread dam got soggy really quickly, and when it crumbled we got beautiful rivers of eggnog flowing everywhere! There are many forests. There is a real Christmas tree forest, an artificial Christmas tree forest, a felt tree forest, even a ceramic christmas tree forest! One year, Santa tried a garlic breadstick forest, but that made everyone rush over to the peppermint forest, and now we’re waiting for that to grow back.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What’s the big man like? \u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nSanta is \u003cem>so\u003c/em> wonderful. We follow and chat with him every day. We tell him all about the new friends we made, and the Christmas cookies, and all the dancing and the presents, and how nice everyone is. He always pretends to give a big sigh of relief when he sends us to the city for a month, but we \u003cem>love\u003c/em> him! \u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What are parties like in the North Pole? \u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nParties are so much fun! You’d be surprised to learn that reindeer like to stay home and read, and elves are notorious no-shows though. Most parties are a raucous mix of gingerbread people, snowmen, candy canes, fruitcakes (careful—they bite) and nutcrackers. Nutcrackers don’t say much but, \u003cem>wow\u003c/em>, can they eat! We turn up the carols, turn on the twinkly lights, and twirl and spin all night.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What is it about San Francisco that brings you back here every year?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nThe city is one of the most beautiful places anywhere. People here are so friendly (even though they sometimes need a nudge) and ready to play with us. Santa really wants us to start a Christmas Parade here, and he sends us every year to build support. One day we hope to march down Market Street with an army of festive trees, candy canes, fruitcakes (remember—they bite) and other holiday characters.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What do magic trees do between January and November?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nWe try and get some rest, but it’s difficult. Sugarplums have dance practice, the Christmas puddings are loud talkers and snowmen are a relentless Tupperware sales force. December is peaceful by comparison.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What are your hopes for 2021?\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nWe hope for more happiness and peace; we hope for more friendship and kind words between neighbors. And we hope we end 2021 dancing on the video screens at the top of the Salesforce tower!\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>To find out where the Tree Twins will be popping up next, follow them on \u003ca href=\"https://www.instagram.com/treetwins/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Instagram\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/treetwins\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Twitter\u003c/a>. They are scheduled to return to the North Pole on Christmas Eve.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cp>When listeners in Fort Wayne, Indiana, tuned into Majic 95.1 in July, they heard something both unexpected and all-too-familiar. The station was playing Christmas music. In the heat of summer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>With the pandemic making life miserable for people, the station was looking for a way to appeal to listeners and boost its ratings, and Christmas songs can be a dependable way of doing so.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We knew that the world was topsy-turvy and we just knew from playing Christmas music over the years that there’s something special about it that people connect with,” says Chris Didier, operations manager at Majic 95.1, whose on-air name is Captain Chris.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>All over the country this year, stations have been playing Christmas music much earlier than normal. One Memphis station started doing it right after Halloween. Another in Youngstown, Ohio, was decking the halls in September.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The radio industry has been hit hard by the pandemic, with ratings falling as much as 50% at first, although they have since rebounded somewhat, says Mike McVay, a radio industry veteran who now works as a consultant.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“There was an incredible drop in listening, mainly because of listening habits. A lot of people who listen to radio listen in their car, and suddenly if you’re working at home and not commuting, that changed that,” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Station officials figured that starting the holidays a bit early might be a way to lure listeners back home.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After all, Christmas music has been a reliable source of ratings gold since around 1990, when 99.9 KEZ, an adult contemporary station in Phoenix, created the format.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We had every consultant, every research person that I could think of, before we did it told us, ‘You are crazy. Do not do it.'” says Jerry Ryan, former vice president and general manager at the radio station.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But the format turned out to be an enormous success, and within a few years hundreds of stations were playing non-stop Christmas music for 24 hours a day.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As the industry discovered, Christmas music can create a powerful emotional bond with an audience, bringing in listeners of all demographics, who want to hear vintage tunes like “\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1FuF7H0uJww\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer\u003c/a>” and Elvis Presley’s “\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KK6sMo8NBY\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Blue Christmas\u003c/a>.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Still, there have traditionally been limits to how far radio stations have been willing to go.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>KEZ, the Phoenix radio station, traditionally began to air Christmas songs right after Thanksgiving, and Ryan says doing so much earlier than that can be jarring for an audience.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I don’t think there’s a heck of a lot of emotional value to Christmas music outside of that particular time,” Ryan says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Not this year, however.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In an unprecedented year marked by the pandemic, many stations say the earlier start to airing Christmas songs has actually been a success with listeners.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Take Majic 95.1, for example.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We got incredible feedback. Lots of calls, lots of emails, people saying, ‘Yes, thank you for doing this, we really love the Christmas music,'” says Captain Chris of Majic 95.1 of its decision to play holiday music in July.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Emily Boldon, vice president of adult contemporary radio at Cumulus Media, which has some two dozen stations employing the holiday format, says she’s seen a similar response.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And she has a theory about what’s happening. She says listeners associate Christmas with the year ending, and this has been a really terrible year.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I think everybody is trying to rush the holiday this year just so we can get beyond it,” Boldon says. “I really truly believe the audience was just ready to get to the end of 2020 as fast as possible this year.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2020 NPR. To see more, visit \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=In+Pandemic%2C+The+Most+Wonderful+Time+For+Christmas+Songs+Turned+Out+To+Be+...+In+July&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>When listeners in Fort Wayne, Indiana, tuned into Majic 95.1 in July, they heard something both unexpected and all-too-familiar. The station was playing Christmas music. In the heat of summer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>With the pandemic making life miserable for people, the station was looking for a way to appeal to listeners and boost its ratings, and Christmas songs can be a dependable way of doing so.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We knew that the world was topsy-turvy and we just knew from playing Christmas music over the years that there’s something special about it that people connect with,” says Chris Didier, operations manager at Majic 95.1, whose on-air name is Captain Chris.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>All over the country this year, stations have been playing Christmas music much earlier than normal. One Memphis station started doing it right after Halloween. Another in Youngstown, Ohio, was decking the halls in September.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The radio industry has been hit hard by the pandemic, with ratings falling as much as 50% at first, although they have since rebounded somewhat, says Mike McVay, a radio industry veteran who now works as a consultant.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“There was an incredible drop in listening, mainly because of listening habits. A lot of people who listen to radio listen in their car, and suddenly if you’re working at home and not commuting, that changed that,” he says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Station officials figured that starting the holidays a bit early might be a way to lure listeners back home.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After all, Christmas music has been a reliable source of ratings gold since around 1990, when 99.9 KEZ, an adult contemporary station in Phoenix, created the format.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We had every consultant, every research person that I could think of, before we did it told us, ‘You are crazy. Do not do it.'” says Jerry Ryan, former vice president and general manager at the radio station.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But the format turned out to be an enormous success, and within a few years hundreds of stations were playing non-stop Christmas music for 24 hours a day.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As the industry discovered, Christmas music can create a powerful emotional bond with an audience, bringing in listeners of all demographics, who want to hear vintage tunes like “\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1FuF7H0uJww\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer\u003c/a>” and Elvis Presley’s “\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KK6sMo8NBY\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Blue Christmas\u003c/a>.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Still, there have traditionally been limits to how far radio stations have been willing to go.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>KEZ, the Phoenix radio station, traditionally began to air Christmas songs right after Thanksgiving, and Ryan says doing so much earlier than that can be jarring for an audience.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I don’t think there’s a heck of a lot of emotional value to Christmas music outside of that particular time,” Ryan says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Not this year, however.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In an unprecedented year marked by the pandemic, many stations say the earlier start to airing Christmas songs has actually been a success with listeners.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Take Majic 95.1, for example.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We got incredible feedback. Lots of calls, lots of emails, people saying, ‘Yes, thank you for doing this, we really love the Christmas music,'” says Captain Chris of Majic 95.1 of its decision to play holiday music in July.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Emily Boldon, vice president of adult contemporary radio at Cumulus Media, which has some two dozen stations employing the holiday format, says she’s seen a similar response.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And she has a theory about what’s happening. She says listeners associate Christmas with the year ending, and this has been a really terrible year.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I think everybody is trying to rush the holiday this year just so we can get beyond it,” Boldon says. “I really truly believe the audience was just ready to get to the end of 2020 as fast as possible this year.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2020 NPR. To see more, visit \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=In+Pandemic%2C+The+Most+Wonderful+Time+For+Christmas+Songs+Turned+Out+To+Be+...+In+July&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cp>He sees you when you’re sleeping, he knows when you’re awake, and he’s the only home invader to be regularly greeted by cookies and a beverage. No wonder. According to many legends, the life of St. Nicholas was awash with heroic acts, miraculous saves and the kind of fiery temper we’re accustomed to admiring in our action heroes. Here are five legends that’ll make you see Santa in a whole new light.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>He Saved Three Sisters From Slavery\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13890135\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 744px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13890135\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Winschsantabiplane___Gallery.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian depiction of Santa in a biplane, throwing gifts towards children standing at an open window.\" width=\"744\" height=\"446\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Winschsantabiplane___Gallery.jpg 744w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Winschsantabiplane___Gallery-160x96.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 744px) 100vw, 744px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Santa hurling gifts at kids from his festive… biplane?\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Picture it: Turkey, 280 A.D. You’re a beautiful young Roman-Greek girl, the eldest of three sisters, and you wanna get hitched. But there’s a problem: your dad is poor as hell and your boyfriend’s family won’t agree to a marriage unless you have a dowry. In fact, \u003cem>no\u003c/em> families in the region will let their sons marry unless the bride shows up with a big ol’ bag of cash. Even worse than that, poor, unmarried women usually get forced into a life of (probably sexual) slavery. [aside postid='pop_107720']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Naturally, the prospect of this is so devastating that all you and your sisters and dad do all day is lie around and cry about it. Then one night, a bag of gold gets pitched through your window and magically lands in a stocking that’s been hung to dry over the fireplace. You’re saved! You can marry your beau! Then, on two subsequent nights, more bags of gold arrive for your sisters. They’re saved too! Then your dad figures out where the gold came from—the new bishop in town. Turns out the holy man inherited great wealth in his teens, after his parents died of the plague. When your dad tries to tell him thanks, the humble bishop replies, “You must thank God alone for providing these gifts in answer to your prayers for deliverance.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That bishop was a young St. Nicholas, and is the reason Santa’s now expected to fill every stocking on Earth each Dec. 25.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>He Saved Three Boys From Being Eaten\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13890134\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13890134\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-10.56.00-AM-800x502.png\" alt=\"Four classic depictions of St. Nicholas saving three boys from being pickled in a barrel.\" width=\"800\" height=\"502\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-10.56.00-AM-800x502.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-10.56.00-AM-160x100.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-10.56.00-AM-768x482.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-10.56.00-AM.png 821w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Four classic depictions of St. Nicholas saving three boys from being pickled in a barrel.\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Since the ninth century, numerous sources and paintings have suggested that St. Nick resurrected three murdered boys whose flesh was to be sold as meat. (I know, I know—there was a famine or something.) The children were apparently tricked by an evil innkeeper, and chopped up and pickled in a barrel. When the innkeeper tried to pass off the meat as ham in order to sell it, St. Nicholas realized evil was afoot, cried out to God, and raised the children from the dead. [aside postid='arts_13872372']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In 1948, Benjamin Britten and Eric Crozier immortalized the gory incident in their cantata \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4wXSm0OpYR4&t=113s\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Saint Nicholas\u003c/em>\u003c/a>. The seventh movement sees the parents of the murdered boys sitting down and getting ready to unwittingly eat their own offspring, when Nicholas intervenes. After instructing them, “O do not taste, O do not feed on sin,” St. Nick revives the boys with the following words: “Timothy, Mark and John / Put your fleshly garments on!” (Catchy!) The boys arrive just moments later, holding hands and singing, “Alleluia to their King!”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>No word on what happened to that damn cannibal innkeeper, though.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>He Was an Exorcist\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13890142\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 761px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13890142\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-1.11.11-PM.png\" alt=\"Two depictions of Saint Nicholas working alongside Krampus in chains.\" width=\"761\" height=\"478\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-1.11.11-PM.png 761w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-1.11.11-PM-160x100.png 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 761px) 100vw, 761px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Two depictions of Saint Nicholas working alongside Krampus in chains.\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>St. Nicholas was said to be masterful at both demon taming and expulsion. \u003ca href=\"https://www.stnicholascenter.org/who-is-st-nicholas/stories-legends/traditional-stories/early-miracles/come-out\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Blessing the possessed\u003c/a>, book of gospels in hand, was all in a day’s work for Nick. He was so good, he’s even said to have \u003ca href=\"https://www.stnicholascenter.org/who-is-st-nicholas/stories-legends/traditional-stories/early-miracles/demons-be-gone\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">expelled demons\u003c/a> from a Cypress tree in the village of Plakoma. (All he had to do was swing an axe and off they went.) Which is why, for centuries, Santa has been \u003ca href=\"https://www.stnicholascenter.org/around-the-world/who-travels-with-st-nicholas\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">depicted\u003c/a> in some parts of the world (particularly Slovakia, Austria, the Czech Republic and Bavaria) alongside a chained \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Krampus\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Krampus\u003c/a>. Sure, Santa keeps the bad guy on hand to deal with naughty children, but he keeps that demon-goat restrained so as not to harm the good ones. Totally reasonable.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>He Saved His People From Famine Using Only Psychic Powers\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13890137\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13890137\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8-800x500.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian Christmas card depicts Santa with large, mesmerizing eyes and fluffy white beard.\" width=\"800\" height=\"500\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8-800x500.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8-1020x638.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8-160x100.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8-768x480.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8-1536x960.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8.jpg 1676w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">“Look into my eyes… You are feeling very, very sleepy…”\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>When famine was raging in ancient Lycia (the region of southwest Turkey where he lived), St. Nick was determined to save his people from starvation. One night, he \u003ca href=\"https://www.stnicholascenter.org/who-is-st-nicholas/stories-legends/traditional-stories/life-of-nicholas/famine-relief\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">psychically located a merchant\u003c/a> in Italy (don’t ask questions) who was about to set sail for Egypt with a ship full of grain. Nicholas appeared to the merchant in a dream and bribed him with three gold coins, magically transferring them into the merchant’s hand while he was sleeping three countries away. (Again, don’t ask questions.) Nicholas told the merchant to bring the grain to Turkey, and sell it there instead. Scared and surprised, the man did as he was told, saved the Lycians, and told all who would listen the magical reason for his unexpected journey.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>He Slapped a Priest For Jesus\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13890139\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13890139\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-11.38.02-AM-800x618.png\" alt=\"St. Nick slapping down the priest Arius for talking smack about Jesus, in art by Alexander Boguslawski.\" width=\"800\" height=\"618\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-11.38.02-AM-800x618.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-11.38.02-AM-160x124.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-11.38.02-AM-768x593.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-11.38.02-AM.png 892w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">St. Nick slapping down the priest Arius for talking smack about Jesus, in art by Alexander Boguslawski. \u003ccite>(StNicholasCenter.org)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>[aside postid='pop_97685']The most \u003ca href=\"https://charlotteriggle.com/st-nicholas-and-arius-at-the-council-of-nicea/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">controversial\u003c/a> moment in St. Nick’s backstory occurred when he was naughty in Nicea. Three hundred bishops and 1,700 other holy men had met in the Greek city to discuss the scriptures. When a priest named Arius was given the floor, much of the crowd was angered by his assertion that Jesus Christ was not equal to God the Father. Nicholas was apparently the most enraged of all, because he promptly approached Arius and slapped him across the face. Embarrassed by the outburst, the other bishops threw Nick in a dungeon. He didn’t stay in there for long. After a number of the holy men dreamed of Nick in his jail cell that night, accompanied by both Jesus and Mary, they decided to free him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>God bless us, everyone! (Except for child picklers, obviously…)\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>He sees you when you’re sleeping, he knows when you’re awake, and he’s the only home invader to be regularly greeted by cookies and a beverage. No wonder. According to many legends, the life of St. Nicholas was awash with heroic acts, miraculous saves and the kind of fiery temper we’re accustomed to admiring in our action heroes. Here are five legends that’ll make you see Santa in a whole new light.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>He Saved Three Sisters From Slavery\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13890135\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 744px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13890135\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Winschsantabiplane___Gallery.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian depiction of Santa in a biplane, throwing gifts towards children standing at an open window.\" width=\"744\" height=\"446\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Winschsantabiplane___Gallery.jpg 744w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Winschsantabiplane___Gallery-160x96.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 744px) 100vw, 744px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Santa hurling gifts at kids from his festive… biplane?\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Picture it: Turkey, 280 A.D. You’re a beautiful young Roman-Greek girl, the eldest of three sisters, and you wanna get hitched. But there’s a problem: your dad is poor as hell and your boyfriend’s family won’t agree to a marriage unless you have a dowry. In fact, \u003cem>no\u003c/em> families in the region will let their sons marry unless the bride shows up with a big ol’ bag of cash. Even worse than that, poor, unmarried women usually get forced into a life of (probably sexual) slavery. \u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Naturally, the prospect of this is so devastating that all you and your sisters and dad do all day is lie around and cry about it. Then one night, a bag of gold gets pitched through your window and magically lands in a stocking that’s been hung to dry over the fireplace. You’re saved! You can marry your beau! Then, on two subsequent nights, more bags of gold arrive for your sisters. They’re saved too! Then your dad figures out where the gold came from—the new bishop in town. Turns out the holy man inherited great wealth in his teens, after his parents died of the plague. When your dad tries to tell him thanks, the humble bishop replies, “You must thank God alone for providing these gifts in answer to your prayers for deliverance.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That bishop was a young St. Nicholas, and is the reason Santa’s now expected to fill every stocking on Earth each Dec. 25.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>He Saved Three Boys From Being Eaten\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13890134\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13890134\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-10.56.00-AM-800x502.png\" alt=\"Four classic depictions of St. Nicholas saving three boys from being pickled in a barrel.\" width=\"800\" height=\"502\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-10.56.00-AM-800x502.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-10.56.00-AM-160x100.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-10.56.00-AM-768x482.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-10.56.00-AM.png 821w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Four classic depictions of St. Nicholas saving three boys from being pickled in a barrel.\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Since the ninth century, numerous sources and paintings have suggested that St. Nick resurrected three murdered boys whose flesh was to be sold as meat. (I know, I know—there was a famine or something.) The children were apparently tricked by an evil innkeeper, and chopped up and pickled in a barrel. When the innkeeper tried to pass off the meat as ham in order to sell it, St. Nicholas realized evil was afoot, cried out to God, and raised the children from the dead. \u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In 1948, Benjamin Britten and Eric Crozier immortalized the gory incident in their cantata \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4wXSm0OpYR4&t=113s\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Saint Nicholas\u003c/em>\u003c/a>. The seventh movement sees the parents of the murdered boys sitting down and getting ready to unwittingly eat their own offspring, when Nicholas intervenes. After instructing them, “O do not taste, O do not feed on sin,” St. Nick revives the boys with the following words: “Timothy, Mark and John / Put your fleshly garments on!” (Catchy!) The boys arrive just moments later, holding hands and singing, “Alleluia to their King!”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>No word on what happened to that damn cannibal innkeeper, though.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>He Was an Exorcist\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13890142\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 761px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-13890142\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-1.11.11-PM.png\" alt=\"Two depictions of Saint Nicholas working alongside Krampus in chains.\" width=\"761\" height=\"478\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-1.11.11-PM.png 761w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-1.11.11-PM-160x100.png 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 761px) 100vw, 761px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Two depictions of Saint Nicholas working alongside Krampus in chains.\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>St. Nicholas was said to be masterful at both demon taming and expulsion. \u003ca href=\"https://www.stnicholascenter.org/who-is-st-nicholas/stories-legends/traditional-stories/early-miracles/come-out\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Blessing the possessed\u003c/a>, book of gospels in hand, was all in a day’s work for Nick. He was so good, he’s even said to have \u003ca href=\"https://www.stnicholascenter.org/who-is-st-nicholas/stories-legends/traditional-stories/early-miracles/demons-be-gone\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">expelled demons\u003c/a> from a Cypress tree in the village of Plakoma. (All he had to do was swing an axe and off they went.) Which is why, for centuries, Santa has been \u003ca href=\"https://www.stnicholascenter.org/around-the-world/who-travels-with-st-nicholas\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">depicted\u003c/a> in some parts of the world (particularly Slovakia, Austria, the Czech Republic and Bavaria) alongside a chained \u003ca href=\"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Krampus\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Krampus\u003c/a>. Sure, Santa keeps the bad guy on hand to deal with naughty children, but he keeps that demon-goat restrained so as not to harm the good ones. Totally reasonable.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>He Saved His People From Famine Using Only Psychic Powers\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13890137\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13890137\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8-800x500.jpg\" alt=\"A Victorian Christmas card depicts Santa with large, mesmerizing eyes and fluffy white beard.\" width=\"800\" height=\"500\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8-800x500.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8-1020x638.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8-160x100.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8-768x480.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8-1536x960.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/SantaPostcardPurple-589d25463df78c4758bb1ad8.jpg 1676w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">“Look into my eyes… You are feeling very, very sleepy…”\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>When famine was raging in ancient Lycia (the region of southwest Turkey where he lived), St. Nick was determined to save his people from starvation. One night, he \u003ca href=\"https://www.stnicholascenter.org/who-is-st-nicholas/stories-legends/traditional-stories/life-of-nicholas/famine-relief\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">psychically located a merchant\u003c/a> in Italy (don’t ask questions) who was about to set sail for Egypt with a ship full of grain. Nicholas appeared to the merchant in a dream and bribed him with three gold coins, magically transferring them into the merchant’s hand while he was sleeping three countries away. (Again, don’t ask questions.) Nicholas told the merchant to bring the grain to Turkey, and sell it there instead. Scared and surprised, the man did as he was told, saved the Lycians, and told all who would listen the magical reason for his unexpected journey.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>He Slapped a Priest For Jesus\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13890139\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13890139\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-11.38.02-AM-800x618.png\" alt=\"St. Nick slapping down the priest Arius for talking smack about Jesus, in art by Alexander Boguslawski.\" width=\"800\" height=\"618\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-11.38.02-AM-800x618.png 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-11.38.02-AM-160x124.png 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-11.38.02-AM-768x593.png 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/12/Screen-Shot-2020-12-09-at-11.38.02-AM.png 892w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">St. Nick slapping down the priest Arius for talking smack about Jesus, in art by Alexander Boguslawski. \u003ccite>(StNicholasCenter.org)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>The most \u003ca href=\"https://charlotteriggle.com/st-nicholas-and-arius-at-the-council-of-nicea/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">controversial\u003c/a> moment in St. Nick’s backstory occurred when he was naughty in Nicea. Three hundred bishops and 1,700 other holy men had met in the Greek city to discuss the scriptures. When a priest named Arius was given the floor, much of the crowd was angered by his assertion that Jesus Christ was not equal to God the Father. Nicholas was apparently the most enraged of all, because he promptly approached Arius and slapped him across the face. Embarrassed by the outburst, the other bishops threw Nick in a dungeon. He didn’t stay in there for long. After a number of the holy men dreamed of Nick in his jail cell that night, accompanied by both Jesus and Mary, they decided to free him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>God bless us, everyone! (Except for child picklers, obviously…)\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"title": "A Cynic’s Guide to 5 (Totally Real) Supernatural Christmas Rom-Coms",
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"content": "\u003cp>Last month, \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2020/11/12/933843001/the-cider-sipping-mitten-wearing-guide-to-2020-holiday-movies\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">NPR compiled a list\u003c/a> of all the new holiday movies arriving on our screens for 2020’s festive season. And there were 89 of them. \u003cem>EIGHTY-NINE\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At this point, in the vast and endless sea of Christmas rom-coms, it’s almost impossible to tell one apart from another. Which might be why a weird sub-genre exists in which the Christmas rom-com tacks on a supernatural element. Because nothing livens up eggnog and longing glances over the fire like throwing a dead guy and some time travel into the mix. Here are five that are streaming right now. (There will be spoilers. And also cynicism.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>The Family Man\u003c/em>\u003c/strong>, 2000, HBO\u003cbr>\n\u003cb>Supernatural something:\u003c/b> A parallel universe\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OnouJoQs52c\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>The Family Man\u003c/em> is basically a vicious two-hour assault on anyone who doesn’t want to have kids. Nicolas Cage plays Jack, a successful, womanizing businessman who gets sent to a parallel universe by Don Cheadle. (I sat through two hours of this crap and never once figured out who or what Don Cheadle is supposed to be.) Anyway, Cheadle (Magic man? Angel? Demon?) meets Jack, Jack goes to sleep in his shiny New York apartment wearing tiny manties, and when Jack wakes up, he’s in the suburbs (where everything is wood-paneled for some reason), wearing regular old boxer shorts. (\u003cem>Oh, the humanity!\u003c/em>)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In his new life, Jack is married to his college girlfriend Kate, living in New Jersey, and selling tires for a living. He also has two loud children, a big dog and a life-advice-giving Jeremy Piven who lives up the street. (\u003cem>The horror!\u003c/em>) I think the people who made \u003cem>The Family Man\u003c/em> want us to think this is better than Jack’s old life. The problem is, it patently isn’t. It’s a nightmare. This is the only movie in history that has ever successfully made me sympathize with The Man.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>The Knight Before Christmas\u003c/em>\u003c/strong>, 2019, Netflix\u003cbr>\n\u003cb>Supernatural something:\u003c/b> A time-traveling knight\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-JtwROpSVWc&t=11s\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>The Knight Before Christmas\u003c/em> is basically a romantic remake of \u003ca href=\"https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0104187/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_0\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Encino Man\u003c/em>\u003c/a>. Sure, there’s a 14th-century knight instead of a caveman, and snow instead of sunshine, and a romance-starved schoolteacher instead of Pauly Shore. But other than that? It’s goddamn \u003cem>Encino Man\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In case you’re too young to know what \u003cem>Encino Man\u003c/em> is, here. Have this.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1xkTN1Z1rTQ\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Link the caveman and Cole the knight do a lot of the same crap, including but not limited to:\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>learning about life from TV,\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>lighting fires in inappropriate places,\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>spitting out food they don’t like,\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>hoarding food they do like,\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>picking up and imitating American slang,\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>being babe magnets.\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>I was genuinely surprised when the knight didn’t have a triumphant dance routine at the end.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>A Christmas Prince 3: The Royal Baby\u003c/em>\u003c/strong>, 2019, Netflix\u003cbr>\n\u003cstrong>Supernatural something:\u003c/strong> A curse\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RK0zCsxBG3U\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It’s going to sound like I’m being hyperbolic when I say this, but I promise you, I am not. \u003cem>A Christmas Prince 3\u003c/em> is the most boring movie in the history of the world. (Even in the country of Aldovia where this is set, a nation that doesn’t even exist.) It’s about baby showers (\u003cem>meh\u003c/em>) and lost international treaties (\u003cem>yawn\u003c/em>) and a very non-eventful blizzard. The extremely dull premise is not helped by the fact that the prince here is basically what would happen if someone built a human man out of dry toast. (White bread, naturally.) Why in \u003cem>The Crown\u003c/em>’s good name did anyone make three of these?! I can’t. I just… I can’t and you shouldn’t either.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>Last Christmas\u003c/em>\u003c/strong>, 2019, HBO\u003cbr>\n\u003cb>Supernatural something:\u003c/b> Ghost boyfriend\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9CEIcmWmtA\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The protagonist in \u003cem>Last Christmas\u003c/em> is a total asshole. Whether she’s killing her friend’s pet fish, outing her sister at the dinner table (!) or getting her boss’ small business broken into, she’s so awful it is impossible to care about anything she does, no matter how much acting her eyebrows do. (Even while George Michael’s delightful greatest hits are playing in the background!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One day a bland archetype of a Handsome Man shows up and tries to make her less of an asshole. He takes her ice-skating, gently touches her heart transplant scar, and sings pop songs with her. Later she finds out that Handsome Man is, in fact, dead and—here comes the extra twist!—he’s the guy her heart transplant came from. Because nothing says seasonal movie fun like dragging the lyrics from Wham!’s “Last Christmas” out to their most literal conclusion.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>The Spirit of Christmas\u003c/em>\u003c/strong>, 2015, Hulu\u003cbr>\n\u003cstrong>Supernatural something:\u003c/strong> A(nother) ghost boyfriend\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrwC1NdRZw8\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Kate is a callous attorney with a string of failed relationships and no plans for the holidays. (\u003cem>Whattabish!\u003c/em>) Her boss tasks her with getting an old inn sold before the end of the year for reasons that are too boring to go into. But appraisers keep bailing on her because the building is haunted by a ghost named Daniel (\u003cem>awesome ghost name\u003c/em>) who looks like a hipster barber from Brooklyn. It’s not an accident either—at one point he literally asks where the Fernet Branca is. [aside postid='arts_13889581']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyhoo, Kate decides to stay in the inn, where she discovers that Daniel turns into a real boy (\u003cem>because sure, okay\u003c/em>) every year between Dec. 12 and 24. Kate and Daniel decide to figure out why this happens to him every year and, wouldn’tyaknowit? After a spot of gratuitous shirtlessness (\u003cem>ghosts iron clothes too!\u003c/em>), some bauble dangling, and some mystery uncovering, Kate does some spirit smooching. This movie is truly awful and everyone should watch it immediately.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Happy holidays, everyone!\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Last month, \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2020/11/12/933843001/the-cider-sipping-mitten-wearing-guide-to-2020-holiday-movies\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">NPR compiled a list\u003c/a> of all the new holiday movies arriving on our screens for 2020’s festive season. And there were 89 of them. \u003cem>EIGHTY-NINE\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At this point, in the vast and endless sea of Christmas rom-coms, it’s almost impossible to tell one apart from another. Which might be why a weird sub-genre exists in which the Christmas rom-com tacks on a supernatural element. Because nothing livens up eggnog and longing glances over the fire like throwing a dead guy and some time travel into the mix. Here are five that are streaming right now. (There will be spoilers. And also cynicism.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>The Family Man\u003c/em>\u003c/strong>, 2000, HBO\u003cbr>\n\u003cb>Supernatural something:\u003c/b> A parallel universe\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/OnouJoQs52c'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/OnouJoQs52c'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cem>The Family Man\u003c/em> is basically a vicious two-hour assault on anyone who doesn’t want to have kids. Nicolas Cage plays Jack, a successful, womanizing businessman who gets sent to a parallel universe by Don Cheadle. (I sat through two hours of this crap and never once figured out who or what Don Cheadle is supposed to be.) Anyway, Cheadle (Magic man? Angel? Demon?) meets Jack, Jack goes to sleep in his shiny New York apartment wearing tiny manties, and when Jack wakes up, he’s in the suburbs (where everything is wood-paneled for some reason), wearing regular old boxer shorts. (\u003cem>Oh, the humanity!\u003c/em>)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In his new life, Jack is married to his college girlfriend Kate, living in New Jersey, and selling tires for a living. He also has two loud children, a big dog and a life-advice-giving Jeremy Piven who lives up the street. (\u003cem>The horror!\u003c/em>) I think the people who made \u003cem>The Family Man\u003c/em> want us to think this is better than Jack’s old life. The problem is, it patently isn’t. It’s a nightmare. This is the only movie in history that has ever successfully made me sympathize with The Man.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>The Knight Before Christmas\u003c/em>\u003c/strong>, 2019, Netflix\u003cbr>\n\u003cb>Supernatural something:\u003c/b> A time-traveling knight\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/-JtwROpSVWc'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/-JtwROpSVWc'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cem>The Knight Before Christmas\u003c/em> is basically a romantic remake of \u003ca href=\"https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0104187/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_0\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\u003cem>Encino Man\u003c/em>\u003c/a>. Sure, there’s a 14th-century knight instead of a caveman, and snow instead of sunshine, and a romance-starved schoolteacher instead of Pauly Shore. But other than that? It’s goddamn \u003cem>Encino Man\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In case you’re too young to know what \u003cem>Encino Man\u003c/em> is, here. Have this.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/1xkTN1Z1rTQ'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/1xkTN1Z1rTQ'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Link the caveman and Cole the knight do a lot of the same crap, including but not limited to:\u003c/p>\n\u003cul>\n\u003cli>learning about life from TV,\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>lighting fires in inappropriate places,\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>spitting out food they don’t like,\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>hoarding food they do like,\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>picking up and imitating American slang,\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>being babe magnets.\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ul>\n\u003cp>I was genuinely surprised when the knight didn’t have a triumphant dance routine at the end.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>A Christmas Prince 3: The Royal Baby\u003c/em>\u003c/strong>, 2019, Netflix\u003cbr>\n\u003cstrong>Supernatural something:\u003c/strong> A curse\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/RK0zCsxBG3U'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/RK0zCsxBG3U'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>It’s going to sound like I’m being hyperbolic when I say this, but I promise you, I am not. \u003cem>A Christmas Prince 3\u003c/em> is the most boring movie in the history of the world. (Even in the country of Aldovia where this is set, a nation that doesn’t even exist.) It’s about baby showers (\u003cem>meh\u003c/em>) and lost international treaties (\u003cem>yawn\u003c/em>) and a very non-eventful blizzard. The extremely dull premise is not helped by the fact that the prince here is basically what would happen if someone built a human man out of dry toast. (White bread, naturally.) Why in \u003cem>The Crown\u003c/em>’s good name did anyone make three of these?! I can’t. I just… I can’t and you shouldn’t either.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>Last Christmas\u003c/em>\u003c/strong>, 2019, HBO\u003cbr>\n\u003cb>Supernatural something:\u003c/b> Ghost boyfriend\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/z9CEIcmWmtA'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/z9CEIcmWmtA'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>The protagonist in \u003cem>Last Christmas\u003c/em> is a total asshole. Whether she’s killing her friend’s pet fish, outing her sister at the dinner table (!) or getting her boss’ small business broken into, she’s so awful it is impossible to care about anything she does, no matter how much acting her eyebrows do. (Even while George Michael’s delightful greatest hits are playing in the background!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One day a bland archetype of a Handsome Man shows up and tries to make her less of an asshole. He takes her ice-skating, gently touches her heart transplant scar, and sings pop songs with her. Later she finds out that Handsome Man is, in fact, dead and—here comes the extra twist!—he’s the guy her heart transplant came from. Because nothing says seasonal movie fun like dragging the lyrics from Wham!’s “Last Christmas” out to their most literal conclusion.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>The Spirit of Christmas\u003c/em>\u003c/strong>, 2015, Hulu\u003cbr>\n\u003cstrong>Supernatural something:\u003c/strong> A(nother) ghost boyfriend\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/JrwC1NdRZw8'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/JrwC1NdRZw8'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Kate is a callous attorney with a string of failed relationships and no plans for the holidays. (\u003cem>Whattabish!\u003c/em>) Her boss tasks her with getting an old inn sold before the end of the year for reasons that are too boring to go into. But appraisers keep bailing on her because the building is haunted by a ghost named Daniel (\u003cem>awesome ghost name\u003c/em>) who looks like a hipster barber from Brooklyn. It’s not an accident either—at one point he literally asks where the Fernet Branca is. \u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyhoo, Kate decides to stay in the inn, where she discovers that Daniel turns into a real boy (\u003cem>because sure, okay\u003c/em>) every year between Dec. 12 and 24. Kate and Daniel decide to figure out why this happens to him every year and, wouldn’tyaknowit? After a spot of gratuitous shirtlessness (\u003cem>ghosts iron clothes too!\u003c/em>), some bauble dangling, and some mystery uncovering, Kate does some spirit smooching. This movie is truly awful and everyone should watch it immediately.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Happy holidays, everyone!\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"title": "The 12 Plays of Christmas: Or, How to Spend Your Winter Vacation",
"headTitle": "The 12 Plays of Christmas: Or, How to Spend Your Winter Vacation | KQED",
"content": "\u003cp>Rejoice, rejoice. While being home for the holidays might seem like a redundant concept this year, you don’t have to spend them in total isolation. Here are 12 ways to give yourself the gift of a little escapist pleasure at the end of this unprecedented year while supporting the Bay Area’s heavily impacted performing arts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13889792\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13889792\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-800x533.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-800x533.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-1536x1024.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-2048x1366.jpg 2048w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-1920x1280.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Taylor Mac gets saucy with the holidays. \u003ccite>(Little Fang Photography)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>Don We Now Our Gay Apparel\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"http://sfcurran.com/shows/taylor-mac-holiday-sauce-pandemic\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Holiday Sauce…Pandemic!\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nCurran Theatre \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fans of full-spectrum spectacle need look no further than the works of MacArthur Fellow Taylor Mac, whose shows embody an expansive vision of queer abundance (and abundant queers). A regular visitor to the Bay Area, Mac first presented \u003cem>Holiday Sauce\u003c/em> on the Curran stage in 2018, a sumptuous romp through holiday memories and songs. All proceeds of this year’s virtual offering will go to \u003ca href=\"http://www.openhousesf.org\">Openhouse\u003c/a>, a local community resource for LGBTQ+ seniors.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Livestream Dec. 12 at 7pm only. On demand until Jan. 2. $10. Info and tickets\u003ca href=\"http://sfcurran.com/shows/taylor-mac-holiday-sauce-pandemic\"> here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"http://www.stellartickets.com/events/the-golden-girls-live/the-golden-girls-live-the-christmas-episodes\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Golden Girls LIVE: Christmas Episodes\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nSF Oasis\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A beloved San Francisco holiday tradition, \u003cem>Golden Girls LIVE: Christmas Episodes\u003c/em> offers nostalgia, drag hilarity, and genuine heart all wrapped up in a Betty White-channeling bow. Co-starring Heklina (Dorothy), Matthew Martin (Blanche), D’Arcy Drollinger (Rose) and Holotta Tymes (Sophia) as our quirky quartet, this year’s episodes will be streamed live from SF Oasis headquarters, complete with a virtual sing-along and VIP meet-and-greet with the cast.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 17-20, times vary. $30-$50. Info and tickets \u003ca href=\"http://www.stellartickets.com/events/the-golden-girls-live/the-golden-girls-live-the-christmas-episodes\">here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>‘\u003ca href=\"http://www.nctcsf.org/events/A-Mighty-Queer-Virtual-Variety-Show\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>A Mighty Queer Virtual Variety Show\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>‘\u003cbr>\nNew Conservatory Theatre Center\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Poets, performance artists, drag stars and circus acts alike appear on the New Conservatory Theatre Center’s virtual stage. Wrangled by Epic Party Theatre’s Richard A. Mosqueda, and hosted by operatic drag diva Dusty Pörn, this festive holiday sampler will fill you with holiday cheer. With Azuah, SevanKelee Lucky 7 Boult, Baruch Porras Hernandez, SNJV, and aerialist Joey The Tiger.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 13–Jan. 3, on demand. $10-$40. Info and tickets \u003ca href=\"http://www.nctcsf.org/events/A-Mighty-Queer-Virtual-Variety-Show\">here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13889789\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13889789\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/SantaGlen_photocredit_courtesyoftheartist-800x582.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"582\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/SantaGlen_photocredit_courtesyoftheartist-800x582.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/SantaGlen_photocredit_courtesyoftheartist-160x116.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/SantaGlen_photocredit_courtesyoftheartist-768x559.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/SantaGlen_photocredit_courtesyoftheartist.jpg 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Santa Claus (Glen Micheletti) is here to save Christmas for you. \u003ccite>(JW Darwin)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>Home Alone\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://www.getsantaclaus.com\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>Get Santa Claus\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cbr>\nGlen A. Micheletti\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Worried about how the kiddies are going to get Santa their wishlist this year? Let expert magician and professional Santa Claus Glen A. Micheletti help. Like so many other performers, Santa Glen has developed ways to bring his act online, and offers personalized virtual visits for individual family units, large family “gatherings” and company ho-ho-holiday parties.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Rates start at $150 for one screen. Custom pricing and packages available for groups. Info and bookings\u003ca href=\"http://www.getsantaclaus.com\"> here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"http://www.sfplayhouse.org/sfph/get-tickets\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">The Jewelry Box\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nSan Francisco Playhouse\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you’re one of the thousands of Bay Area denizens who’ve seen Brian Copeland’s \u003cem>Not a Genuine Black Man\u003c/em>, this holiday prequel is for you. A richly detailed portrait of Oakland city life as seen through the eyes of a six-year-old child on a quest to earn the perfect Christmas gift for his mother. Copeland’s performance is filmed live onstage at San Francisco Playhouse, and streamed on demand through Christmas Day.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Nov. 28–Dec. 25, 7pm. $15-$100. Info and tickets \u003ca href=\"http://www.sfplayhouse.org/sfph/get-tickets\">here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"https://cltc.org/tickets/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">A Christmas Carol\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nCity Lights Theater Company\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>San Jose’s City Lights Theater Company has been finding all kinds of creative ways to keep active, as this solo performance of Charles Dickens’ \u003cem>A Christmas Carol\u003c/em> proves. Adapted and performed by prolific Bay Area actor and director Mark Anderson Phillips, this virtual tour de force will be mandatory viewing for those who enjoy their classics with a twist.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 15–Jan. 5, on demand. $10-$30 (or part of season pass). Info and tickets\u003ca href=\"https://cltc.org/tickets/\"> here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13889791\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13889791\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-800x532.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"532\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-800x532.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-1020x679.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-160x106.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-768x511.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-1536x1022.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-1920x1278.jpg 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne.jpg 2000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Cast of ‘A Christmas Carol’ at A.C.T. in 2018. \u003ccite>(Kevin Berne)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>Tradition, Tradition\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"https://secure.act-sf.org/events\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">A Christmas Carol: On Air\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nAmerican Conservatory Theater\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This beloved staple of Bay Area holiday tradition gets a socially distanced makeover in the form of a radio play adaptation, helmed by Peter J. Kuo (who also directed this summer’s successful Zoom production of\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/13885920/alls-fair-game-in-love-and-warcraft\"> \u003cem>In Love and Warcraft\u003c/em>\u003c/a>). Starring the redoubtable James Carpenter as Ebenezer Scrooge, this tale of Christmas spirit(s) continues to stand the test of time and circumstance.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 4–31, 6pm listening parties and on demand. $40–$60. Info and tickets\u003ca href=\"https://secure.act-sf.org/events\"> here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003ca href=\"http://www.koshercomedy.com\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">28th Annual Kung Pao Kosher Comedy\u003c/a>\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Buckle up \u003cem>bubbeleh\u003c/em>. While gathering in restaurants in person may still be out of the question, there’s nothing stopping you from ordering up a few plates of Chinese food and hanging out with Lisa Geduldig and friends for the 28th annual Kung Pao Kosher Comedy show—the Christmas show by and for Jews. Featuring the award-winning talents of Judy Gold and Alex Edelman, and optional participant breakout rooms for schmoozing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 24–26, times vary. Livestream. $25-$50. Info and tickets \u003ca href=\"http://www.CityBoxOffice.com/KungPao\">here.\u003c/a>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"http://www.sfballet.org/productions/nutcracker-online/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Nutcracker Online\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nSan Francisco Ballet\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The first U.S. company to perform the “full” version of \u003cem>Nutcracker\u003c/em>, in 1944, the San Francisco Ballet hosts an annual, all-ages fantasia that attracts some 75,000 audience members per year. This year, sugar plum lovers will be able to view a classic performance choreographed by Helgi Tomasson, \u003ca href=\"https://video.kqed.org/video/great-performances-san-francisco-ballets-nutcracker-preview\">and filmed by KQED in 2007\u003c/a>. Features the luminous Yuan Yuan Tan as the Snow Queen.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Nov. 27–Dec. 31. $49 for 48-hour access. Info and tickets \u003ca href=\"http://www.sfballet.org/productions/nutcracker-online/\">here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13816058\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13816058\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-800x450.jpg\" alt=\"Kitka does its annual 'Wintersongs' tour around the Bay Area\" width=\"800\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-800x450.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-160x90.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-768x432.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-1020x573.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-1180x663.jpg 1180w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-960x540.jpg 960w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-240x135.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-375x211.jpg 375w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-520x292.jpg 520w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540.jpg 1500w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Kitka does its annual ‘Wintersongs’ tour around the Bay Area. \u003ccite>(Photo: Tomas Pacha/Kitka )\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>Winter Wonderland\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"http://www.kitka.org/wintersongs2020\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Wintersongs 2020\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nKitka\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Get into the fun tradition of counting down to Christmas with Kitka’s gift of \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/forum/2010101868688/live-performance-kitka-sings-wintersongs-of-eastern-europe\">Wintersong\u003c/a>. Each day until Dec. 31, this all-woman vocal ensemble—who specialize in excavating the traditional music of Eastern Europe and the Balkans—will release one new song online for all to enjoy, free of charge (donations accepted).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Through Dec. 31. Free. Info and songs \u003ca href=\"http://www.kitka.org/wintersongs2020\">here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"https://theatreworks.org/simplegifts/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Simple Gifts\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nTheatreWorks Silicon Valley\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When Tim Bond took over the artistic leadership of TheatreWorks in July, he stepped into a season beset by unanticipated challenges from the pandemic shutdown of live theatre. With \u003cem>Simple Gifts\u003c/em>, he offers a welcome respite from the chaos, with a carefully chosen cast performing music from a diverse array of holiday traditions such as Kwanzaa, Christmas, Hanukkah, Noche Buena, Diwali and Las Posadas.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 10–28. Times vary. $10+. Info and tickets\u003ca href=\"https://theatreworks.org/simplegifts/\"> here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"http://manualcinema.com/christmascarol\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">A Christmas Carol\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nManual Cinema\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>‘Tis the season to get Scrooged, and Manual Cinema’s original take on Dickens’ classic is poised to be one of this year’s most memorable. Created by Chicago-based Manual Cinema, who infuse their multimedia projects with elements of live performance, this daring adaptation includes shadow puppets, live actors, projections, immersive sound design and original music. Co-presented with Cal Performances for three nights (and other organizations from Dec. 3-20).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 17-19, times vary, livestream. Info and tickets\u003ca href=\"https://calperformances.org/events/2020-21/at-home/manual-cinema-a-christmas-carol/\"> here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n",
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"excerpt": "Holiday traditions like 'Nutcracker' and 'A Christmas Carol' meet new, dynamic productions in our livestreamed theater roundup. ",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Rejoice, rejoice. While being home for the holidays might seem like a redundant concept this year, you don’t have to spend them in total isolation. Here are 12 ways to give yourself the gift of a little escapist pleasure at the end of this unprecedented year while supporting the Bay Area’s heavily impacted performing arts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13889792\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13889792\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-800x533.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-800x533.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-160x107.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-768x512.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-1536x1024.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-2048x1366.jpg 2048w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/TaylorMac_HolidaySauce_credit_LittleFang-1920x1280.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Taylor Mac gets saucy with the holidays. \u003ccite>(Little Fang Photography)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>Don We Now Our Gay Apparel\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"http://sfcurran.com/shows/taylor-mac-holiday-sauce-pandemic\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Holiday Sauce…Pandemic!\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nCurran Theatre \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fans of full-spectrum spectacle need look no further than the works of MacArthur Fellow Taylor Mac, whose shows embody an expansive vision of queer abundance (and abundant queers). A regular visitor to the Bay Area, Mac first presented \u003cem>Holiday Sauce\u003c/em> on the Curran stage in 2018, a sumptuous romp through holiday memories and songs. All proceeds of this year’s virtual offering will go to \u003ca href=\"http://www.openhousesf.org\">Openhouse\u003c/a>, a local community resource for LGBTQ+ seniors.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Livestream Dec. 12 at 7pm only. On demand until Jan. 2. $10. Info and tickets\u003ca href=\"http://sfcurran.com/shows/taylor-mac-holiday-sauce-pandemic\"> here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"http://www.stellartickets.com/events/the-golden-girls-live/the-golden-girls-live-the-christmas-episodes\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Golden Girls LIVE: Christmas Episodes\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nSF Oasis\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A beloved San Francisco holiday tradition, \u003cem>Golden Girls LIVE: Christmas Episodes\u003c/em> offers nostalgia, drag hilarity, and genuine heart all wrapped up in a Betty White-channeling bow. Co-starring Heklina (Dorothy), Matthew Martin (Blanche), D’Arcy Drollinger (Rose) and Holotta Tymes (Sophia) as our quirky quartet, this year’s episodes will be streamed live from SF Oasis headquarters, complete with a virtual sing-along and VIP meet-and-greet with the cast.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 17-20, times vary. $30-$50. Info and tickets \u003ca href=\"http://www.stellartickets.com/events/the-golden-girls-live/the-golden-girls-live-the-christmas-episodes\">here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>‘\u003ca href=\"http://www.nctcsf.org/events/A-Mighty-Queer-Virtual-Variety-Show\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>A Mighty Queer Virtual Variety Show\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>‘\u003cbr>\nNew Conservatory Theatre Center\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Poets, performance artists, drag stars and circus acts alike appear on the New Conservatory Theatre Center’s virtual stage. Wrangled by Epic Party Theatre’s Richard A. Mosqueda, and hosted by operatic drag diva Dusty Pörn, this festive holiday sampler will fill you with holiday cheer. With Azuah, SevanKelee Lucky 7 Boult, Baruch Porras Hernandez, SNJV, and aerialist Joey The Tiger.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 13–Jan. 3, on demand. $10-$40. Info and tickets \u003ca href=\"http://www.nctcsf.org/events/A-Mighty-Queer-Virtual-Variety-Show\">here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13889789\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13889789\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/SantaGlen_photocredit_courtesyoftheartist-800x582.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"582\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/SantaGlen_photocredit_courtesyoftheartist-800x582.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/SantaGlen_photocredit_courtesyoftheartist-160x116.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/SantaGlen_photocredit_courtesyoftheartist-768x559.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/SantaGlen_photocredit_courtesyoftheartist.jpg 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Santa Claus (Glen Micheletti) is here to save Christmas for you. \u003ccite>(JW Darwin)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>Home Alone\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"http://www.getsantaclaus.com\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">\u003cstrong>Get Santa Claus\u003c/strong>\u003c/a>\u003cbr>\nGlen A. Micheletti\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Worried about how the kiddies are going to get Santa their wishlist this year? Let expert magician and professional Santa Claus Glen A. Micheletti help. Like so many other performers, Santa Glen has developed ways to bring his act online, and offers personalized virtual visits for individual family units, large family “gatherings” and company ho-ho-holiday parties.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Rates start at $150 for one screen. Custom pricing and packages available for groups. Info and bookings\u003ca href=\"http://www.getsantaclaus.com\"> here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"http://www.sfplayhouse.org/sfph/get-tickets\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">The Jewelry Box\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nSan Francisco Playhouse\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you’re one of the thousands of Bay Area denizens who’ve seen Brian Copeland’s \u003cem>Not a Genuine Black Man\u003c/em>, this holiday prequel is for you. A richly detailed portrait of Oakland city life as seen through the eyes of a six-year-old child on a quest to earn the perfect Christmas gift for his mother. Copeland’s performance is filmed live onstage at San Francisco Playhouse, and streamed on demand through Christmas Day.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Nov. 28–Dec. 25, 7pm. $15-$100. Info and tickets \u003ca href=\"http://www.sfplayhouse.org/sfph/get-tickets\">here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"https://cltc.org/tickets/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">A Christmas Carol\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nCity Lights Theater Company\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>San Jose’s City Lights Theater Company has been finding all kinds of creative ways to keep active, as this solo performance of Charles Dickens’ \u003cem>A Christmas Carol\u003c/em> proves. Adapted and performed by prolific Bay Area actor and director Mark Anderson Phillips, this virtual tour de force will be mandatory viewing for those who enjoy their classics with a twist.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 15–Jan. 5, on demand. $10-$30 (or part of season pass). Info and tickets\u003ca href=\"https://cltc.org/tickets/\"> here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13889791\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13889791\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-800x532.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"532\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-800x532.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-1020x679.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-160x106.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-768x511.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-1536x1022.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne-1920x1278.jpg 1920w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2020/11/ACT_AChristmasCarol2018_photocredit_KevinBerne.jpg 2000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Cast of ‘A Christmas Carol’ at A.C.T. in 2018. \u003ccite>(Kevin Berne)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>Tradition, Tradition\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"https://secure.act-sf.org/events\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">A Christmas Carol: On Air\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nAmerican Conservatory Theater\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This beloved staple of Bay Area holiday tradition gets a socially distanced makeover in the form of a radio play adaptation, helmed by Peter J. Kuo (who also directed this summer’s successful Zoom production of\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/arts/13885920/alls-fair-game-in-love-and-warcraft\"> \u003cem>In Love and Warcraft\u003c/em>\u003c/a>). Starring the redoubtable James Carpenter as Ebenezer Scrooge, this tale of Christmas spirit(s) continues to stand the test of time and circumstance.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 4–31, 6pm listening parties and on demand. $40–$60. Info and tickets\u003ca href=\"https://secure.act-sf.org/events\"> here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>\u003ca href=\"http://www.koshercomedy.com\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">28th Annual Kung Pao Kosher Comedy\u003c/a>\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Buckle up \u003cem>bubbeleh\u003c/em>. While gathering in restaurants in person may still be out of the question, there’s nothing stopping you from ordering up a few plates of Chinese food and hanging out with Lisa Geduldig and friends for the 28th annual Kung Pao Kosher Comedy show—the Christmas show by and for Jews. Featuring the award-winning talents of Judy Gold and Alex Edelman, and optional participant breakout rooms for schmoozing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 24–26, times vary. Livestream. $25-$50. Info and tickets \u003ca href=\"http://www.CityBoxOffice.com/KungPao\">here.\u003c/a>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"http://www.sfballet.org/productions/nutcracker-online/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Nutcracker Online\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nSan Francisco Ballet\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The first U.S. company to perform the “full” version of \u003cem>Nutcracker\u003c/em>, in 1944, the San Francisco Ballet hosts an annual, all-ages fantasia that attracts some 75,000 audience members per year. This year, sugar plum lovers will be able to view a classic performance choreographed by Helgi Tomasson, \u003ca href=\"https://video.kqed.org/video/great-performances-san-francisco-ballets-nutcracker-preview\">and filmed by KQED in 2007\u003c/a>. Features the luminous Yuan Yuan Tan as the Snow Queen.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Nov. 27–Dec. 31. $49 for 48-hour access. Info and tickets \u003ca href=\"http://www.sfballet.org/productions/nutcracker-online/\">here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_13816058\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-13816058\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-800x450.jpg\" alt=\"Kitka does its annual 'Wintersongs' tour around the Bay Area\" width=\"800\" height=\"450\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-800x450.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-160x90.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-768x432.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-1020x573.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-1180x663.jpg 1180w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-960x540.jpg 960w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-240x135.jpg 240w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-375x211.jpg 375w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540-520x292.jpg 520w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2017/11/Kitka-in-the-woods-e1511990404540.jpg 1500w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Kitka does its annual ‘Wintersongs’ tour around the Bay Area. \u003ccite>(Photo: Tomas Pacha/Kitka )\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003ch2>Winter Wonderland\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"http://www.kitka.org/wintersongs2020\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Wintersongs 2020\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nKitka\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Get into the fun tradition of counting down to Christmas with Kitka’s gift of \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/forum/2010101868688/live-performance-kitka-sings-wintersongs-of-eastern-europe\">Wintersong\u003c/a>. Each day until Dec. 31, this all-woman vocal ensemble—who specialize in excavating the traditional music of Eastern Europe and the Balkans—will release one new song online for all to enjoy, free of charge (donations accepted).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Through Dec. 31. Free. Info and songs \u003ca href=\"http://www.kitka.org/wintersongs2020\">here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"https://theatreworks.org/simplegifts/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Simple Gifts\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nTheatreWorks Silicon Valley\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When Tim Bond took over the artistic leadership of TheatreWorks in July, he stepped into a season beset by unanticipated challenges from the pandemic shutdown of live theatre. With \u003cem>Simple Gifts\u003c/em>, he offers a welcome respite from the chaos, with a carefully chosen cast performing music from a diverse array of holiday traditions such as Kwanzaa, Christmas, Hanukkah, Noche Buena, Diwali and Las Posadas.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 10–28. Times vary. $10+. Info and tickets\u003ca href=\"https://theatreworks.org/simplegifts/\"> here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>‘\u003ca href=\"http://manualcinema.com/christmascarol\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">A Christmas Carol\u003c/a>‘\u003c/strong>\u003cbr>\nManual Cinema\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>‘Tis the season to get Scrooged, and Manual Cinema’s original take on Dickens’ classic is poised to be one of this year’s most memorable. Created by Chicago-based Manual Cinema, who infuse their multimedia projects with elements of live performance, this daring adaptation includes shadow puppets, live actors, projections, immersive sound design and original music. Co-presented with Cal Performances for three nights (and other organizations from Dec. 3-20).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Dec. 17-19, times vary, livestream. Info and tickets\u003ca href=\"https://calperformances.org/events/2020-21/at-home/manual-cinema-a-christmas-carol/\"> here\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cp>There’s nothing like the holidays in Union Square. Christmas tea at the St. Francis, the giant five-story tree at Neiman Marcus, ice skating in the heart of San Francisco and crowded sidewalks galore. \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We recently dug in our archives here at KQED and discovered footage of Christmastime at Union Square from the late ’60s and early ’70s. Longtime locals will recognize bygone stores like FAO Schwarz (“Welcome to Our World of Toys”) and City of Paris, and vintage toy enthusiasts will notice the train sets and robots. The fashions are decidedly of the era, too—if you look closely, you’ll even see a longhaired, bellbottomed hippie among the tweed coats and three-piece suits. \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Union Square is still a shopping mecca at Christmas—enjoy this brief glance at how it used to look. \u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n",
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"title": "After 25 Years, Mariah Carey's 'All I Want For Christmas is You' is No. 1 at Last",
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"content": "\u003cp>It’s no longer uncommon for pop songs to experience a slow rise to the top of the pop charts. Just this year, \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/artists/718208340/lil-nas-x\">Lil Nas X\u003c/a>‘s “Old Town Road” followed a long and \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2019/07/18/743121439/lil-nas-x-old-town-road-billie-eilish-bad-guy-remix-billboard-charts\">remix-strewn\u003c/a> path to 19 weeks at No. 1, while \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/artists/502301111/lizzo\">Lizzo\u003c/a> experienced huge hits with songs originally released in 2017 (“Truth Hurts”) and 2016 (“Good As Hell”). But this is another level altogether: \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/artists/15324690/mariah-carey\">Mariah Carey\u003c/a>‘s holiday juggernaut “All I Want for Christmas Is You” \u003cem>just this week\u003c/em> topped the \u003cem>Billboard\u003c/em> Hot 100 for the first time in the song’s 25-year history.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXQViqx6GMY\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in 2013, my colleague and pal \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/people/706635917/chris-klimek\">Chris Klimek\u003c/a>—as thoroughgoing an expert on Christmas music as you’ll find—\u003ca href=\"https://slate.com/human-interest/2013/12/new-christmas-songs-from-kelly-clarkson-and-mary-j-blige-wont-become-holiday-classics-why.html\">wrote a piece for \u003cem>Slate\u003c/em>\u003c/a> in which he wondered why no new holiday songs had pierced the public consciousness since “All I Want for Christmas Is You.” (As he wrote at the time, “The holiday-song canon is closed.”) Now, at least for this particular week in December 2019, Carey’s classic doesn’t just represent the last word in holiday songs; it’s the last word in \u003cem>songs\u003c/em>, period.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The newfound chart dominance of “All I Want for Christmas”—it climbed as high as No. 3 last holiday season—can be chalked up to any number of factors, including nostalgia, the ever-growing influence of streaming services and the fact that “All I Want for Christmas” has aged remarkably well. It’s a deeply durable song; as if you need proof, consider 1) that it’s probably already stuck in your head and 2) Carey’s 2012 performance of the song with Jimmy Fallon, The Roots and an assortment of instruments found in any given elementary-school classroom.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWEfszb9h8Q&feature=emb_logo\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But you also can’t discount the sheer accumulated strength of Carey herself: with “All I Want for Christmas Is You,” the singer is just one No. 1 hit shy of the record—20—set by \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/artists/15229570/the-beatles\">The Beatles\u003c/a>. When she had a mere 18 No. 1 hits, she was mired in a tie for second with some also-ran by the name of \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/artists/15624007/elvis-presley\">Elvis Presley\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fortunately for Lil Nas X, the record \u003cem>he\u003c/em> set in 2019—those 19 consecutive weeks at No. 1—is almost certainly safe, given that interest in “All I Want for Christmas Is You” is likely to decline, however temporarily, in just a week and a half.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Merry Christmas (Deluxe Anniversary Edition) \u003cem>is out now via \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://mariahcarey.lnk.to/MerryChristmas25\">\u003cem>Legacy Recordings\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"> NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=After+25+Years%2C+Mariah+Carey%27s+%27All+I+Want+For+Christmas+Is+You%27+Is+No.+1+At+Last&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>It’s no longer uncommon for pop songs to experience a slow rise to the top of the pop charts. Just this year, \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/artists/718208340/lil-nas-x\">Lil Nas X\u003c/a>‘s “Old Town Road” followed a long and \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2019/07/18/743121439/lil-nas-x-old-town-road-billie-eilish-bad-guy-remix-billboard-charts\">remix-strewn\u003c/a> path to 19 weeks at No. 1, while \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/artists/502301111/lizzo\">Lizzo\u003c/a> experienced huge hits with songs originally released in 2017 (“Truth Hurts”) and 2016 (“Good As Hell”). But this is another level altogether: \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/artists/15324690/mariah-carey\">Mariah Carey\u003c/a>‘s holiday juggernaut “All I Want for Christmas Is You” \u003cem>just this week\u003c/em> topped the \u003cem>Billboard\u003c/em> Hot 100 for the first time in the song’s 25-year history.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/yXQViqx6GMY'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/yXQViqx6GMY'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Back in 2013, my colleague and pal \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/people/706635917/chris-klimek\">Chris Klimek\u003c/a>—as thoroughgoing an expert on Christmas music as you’ll find—\u003ca href=\"https://slate.com/human-interest/2013/12/new-christmas-songs-from-kelly-clarkson-and-mary-j-blige-wont-become-holiday-classics-why.html\">wrote a piece for \u003cem>Slate\u003c/em>\u003c/a> in which he wondered why no new holiday songs had pierced the public consciousness since “All I Want for Christmas Is You.” (As he wrote at the time, “The holiday-song canon is closed.”) Now, at least for this particular week in December 2019, Carey’s classic doesn’t just represent the last word in holiday songs; it’s the last word in \u003cem>songs\u003c/em>, period.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The newfound chart dominance of “All I Want for Christmas”—it climbed as high as No. 3 last holiday season—can be chalked up to any number of factors, including nostalgia, the ever-growing influence of streaming services and the fact that “All I Want for Christmas” has aged remarkably well. It’s a deeply durable song; as if you need proof, consider 1) that it’s probably already stuck in your head and 2) Carey’s 2012 performance of the song with Jimmy Fallon, The Roots and an assortment of instruments found in any given elementary-school classroom.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/sWEfszb9h8Q'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/sWEfszb9h8Q'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But you also can’t discount the sheer accumulated strength of Carey herself: with “All I Want for Christmas Is You,” the singer is just one No. 1 hit shy of the record—20—set by \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/artists/15229570/the-beatles\">The Beatles\u003c/a>. When she had a mere 18 No. 1 hits, she was mired in a tie for second with some also-ran by the name of \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/artists/15624007/elvis-presley\">Elvis Presley\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fortunately for Lil Nas X, the record \u003cem>he\u003c/em> set in 2019—those 19 consecutive weeks at No. 1—is almost certainly safe, given that interest in “All I Want for Christmas Is You” is likely to decline, however temporarily, in just a week and a half.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Merry Christmas (Deluxe Anniversary Edition) \u003cem>is out now via \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://mariahcarey.lnk.to/MerryChristmas25\">\u003cem>Legacy Recordings\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"> NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg decoding=\"async\" src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=After+25+Years%2C+Mariah+Carey%27s+%27All+I+Want+For+Christmas+Is+You%27+Is+No.+1+At+Last&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"info": "Possible is hosted by entrepreneur Reid Hoffman and writer Aria Finger. Together in Possible, Hoffman and Finger lead enlightening discussions about building a brighter collective future. The show features interviews with visionary guests like Trevor Noah, Sam Altman and Janette Sadik-Khan. Possible paints an optimistic portrait of the world we can create through science, policy, business, art and our shared humanity. It asks: What if everything goes right for once? How can we get there? Each episode also includes a short fiction story generated by advanced AI GPT-4, serving as a thought-provoking springboard to speculate how humanity could leverage technology for good.",
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"radiolab": {
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"info": "A two-time Peabody Award-winner, Radiolab is an investigation told through sounds and stories, and centered around one big idea. In the Radiolab world, information sounds like music and science and culture collide. Hosted by Jad Abumrad and Robert Krulwich, the show is designed for listeners who demand skepticism, but appreciate wonder. WNYC Studios is the producer of other leading podcasts including Freakonomics Radio, Death, Sex & Money, On the Media and many more.",
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"rightnowish": {
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"title": "Rightnowish",
"tagline": "Art is where you find it",
"info": "Rightnowish digs into life in the Bay Area right now… ish. Journalist Pendarvis Harshaw takes us to galleries painted on the sides of liquor stores in West Oakland. We'll dance in warehouses in the Bayview, make smoothies with kids in South Berkeley, and listen to classical music in a 1984 Cutlass Supreme in Richmond. Every week, Pen talks to movers and shakers about how the Bay Area shapes what they create, and how they shape the place we call home.",
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"soldout": {
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"title": "SOLD OUT: Rethinking Housing in America",
"tagline": "A new future for housing",
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"info": "",
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"tech-nation": {
"id": "tech-nation",
"title": "Tech Nation Radio Podcast",
"info": "Tech Nation is a weekly public radio program, hosted by Dr. Moira Gunn. Founded in 1993, it has grown from a simple interview show to a multi-faceted production, featuring conversations with noted technology and science leaders, and a weekly science and technology-related commentary.",
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"ted-radio-hour": {
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"title": "TED Radio Hour",
"info": "The TED Radio Hour is a journey through fascinating ideas, astonishing inventions, fresh approaches to old problems, and new ways to think and create.",
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