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"content": "\u003cp>The global youth brand MTV has chosen Sheila Nevins to head a new documentary division. Nicknamed the \"doyenne of documentaries,\" Nevins, 80, was the president of HBO Documentary Films. With some 1,500 credits to her name, Nevins has won numerous Oscar, Emmy and Peabody Awards, including several lifetime achievement awards.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nevins says she feels \"lucky\" to have landed the MTV job. \"At my age, most people would think that I would be out to pasture, or that I would be gardening, or that I would be taking pictures of my grandchildren—of which I have none,\" Nevins says. \"But I'm really not. I'm engaged in making a difference and will be until I lose it—and I haven't lost it yet.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nevins brings an extremely broad palate to MTV, for both subject matter and style. She's executive produced biographical films on creative figures such as \u003ca href=\"https://www.imdb.com/title/tt7689966/?ref_=ttfc_fc_tt\">Robin Williams\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGkj3ljFGs8\">Stephen Sondheim\u003c/a> and true-crime dramas such as \u003ca href=\"https://www.hbo.com/embed/the-jinx-the-life-and-deaths-of-robert-durst/videos/s1-trailer\">\u003cem>The Jinx\u003c/em>\u003c/a> about real estate heir Robert Durst and \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thjpLjNKpc4&t=46s\">Paradise Lost\u003c/a> \u003c/em>about the West Memphis Three.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After years of declining ratings and ad revenue, MTV is undergoing a turnaround under president Chris McCarthy who hopes Nevins will bring up the next generation of filmmakers on his network.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_111673\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-111673\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-800x533.jpg\" alt=\"Sheila Nevins, the former president of HBO Documentary Films, will join MTV to launch MTV Documentary Films.\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-1200x800.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-1920x1280.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Sheila Nevins, the former president of HBO Documentary Films, will join MTV to launch MTV Documentary Films. \u003ccite>(Brigitte Lacombe/Viacom)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>He tells NPR he was a fan of Nevins long before he started working in media; he remembers watching HBO's unscripted, cinema verite-style series \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NgWVmi5P-D0\">Taxicab Confessions\u003c/a> as a kid growing up in Levittown, Pa.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"You really got to see true human stories,\" McCarthy says. \"Even the theme song itself was quite brilliant. It helped you to understand there's another world out there more than the small worlds many of us were living in.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He also praises Nevins' interest in \"underdog stories.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nevins would like to see MTV's documentary division tackle topics like addiction, race, the legalization of marijuana and climate change.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"The world is changing and the world is hurting itself ... in ways that matter to a 14, 18, 25 and 39-year-old,\" Nevins says. \"We have to show that, and we have to activate that person to think that they can do something about it.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Pressed for more details about how she plans to do that, Nevins jokes: \"It depends on how much money they give me.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org\">NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=MTV+Launches+New+Documentary+Division+Led+By+Producer+Sheila+Nevins&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>The global youth brand MTV has chosen Sheila Nevins to head a new documentary division. Nicknamed the \"doyenne of documentaries,\" Nevins, 80, was the president of HBO Documentary Films. With some 1,500 credits to her name, Nevins has won numerous Oscar, Emmy and Peabody Awards, including several lifetime achievement awards.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nevins says she feels \"lucky\" to have landed the MTV job. \"At my age, most people would think that I would be out to pasture, or that I would be gardening, or that I would be taking pictures of my grandchildren—of which I have none,\" Nevins says. \"But I'm really not. I'm engaged in making a difference and will be until I lose it—and I haven't lost it yet.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nevins brings an extremely broad palate to MTV, for both subject matter and style. She's executive produced biographical films on creative figures such as \u003ca href=\"https://www.imdb.com/title/tt7689966/?ref_=ttfc_fc_tt\">Robin Williams\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGkj3ljFGs8\">Stephen Sondheim\u003c/a> and true-crime dramas such as \u003ca href=\"https://www.hbo.com/embed/the-jinx-the-life-and-deaths-of-robert-durst/videos/s1-trailer\">\u003cem>The Jinx\u003c/em>\u003c/a> about real estate heir Robert Durst and \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thjpLjNKpc4&t=46s\">Paradise Lost\u003c/a> \u003c/em>about the West Memphis Three.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After years of declining ratings and ad revenue, MTV is undergoing a turnaround under president Chris McCarthy who hopes Nevins will bring up the next generation of filmmakers on his network.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_111673\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-111673\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-800x533.jpg\" alt=\"Sheila Nevins, the former president of HBO Documentary Films, will join MTV to launch MTV Documentary Films.\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-1200x800.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a-1920x1280.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/sheila-nevins_enl-09bc2faef0eb9de81c295b498134420e7e720a7a.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Sheila Nevins, the former president of HBO Documentary Films, will join MTV to launch MTV Documentary Films. \u003ccite>(Brigitte Lacombe/Viacom)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>He tells NPR he was a fan of Nevins long before he started working in media; he remembers watching HBO's unscripted, cinema verite-style series \u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NgWVmi5P-D0\">Taxicab Confessions\u003c/a> as a kid growing up in Levittown, Pa.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"You really got to see true human stories,\" McCarthy says. \"Even the theme song itself was quite brilliant. It helped you to understand there's another world out there more than the small worlds many of us were living in.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He also praises Nevins' interest in \"underdog stories.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nevins would like to see MTV's documentary division tackle topics like addiction, race, the legalization of marijuana and climate change.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"The world is changing and the world is hurting itself ... in ways that matter to a 14, 18, 25 and 39-year-old,\" Nevins says. \"We have to show that, and we have to activate that person to think that they can do something about it.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Pressed for more details about how she plans to do that, Nevins jokes: \"It depends on how much money they give me.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org\">NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=MTV+Launches+New+Documentary+Division+Led+By+Producer+Sheila+Nevins&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 4 Recap: Drunk In Love",
"title": "'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 4 Recap: Drunk In Love",
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"content": "\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, all hell broke loose.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This Lyanna Mormont moment captures the essence of the Battle of Winterfell:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111414\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/lyanna-mormont-battle-of-winterfell.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone's favorite middle schooler ended up dying, along with Jorah, Melisandre, pretty much all the Dothraki, Theon and some other randos.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111424\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-beer.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, and ARYA MOTHER F*CKING STARK SINGLE-HANDEDLY KILLED THE NIGHT KING! If you missed that moment or just want to see it again, here it is, complete with added celebratory scenes from \u003cem>The Truman Show\u003c/em> because I'm random.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/1122712859421499393\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Now with the existential threat of the Night King and his dead army gone, what in the world is going to happen next? Let's find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's the morning after the Battle of Winterfell. The camera slowly pans up the body of a fallen hero. The MVP. It's obviously Lil Lyanna Mormont.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, it's Jorah?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany weeps over him while feeling really badly about friend-zoning him so hard while he was alive.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany, I'ma let you finish, but LYANNA HAD ONE OF THE MOST HEART-WRENCHING \u003cem>GAME OF THRONES\u003c/em> DEATHS OF ALL TIME!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111602\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1020x521.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"327\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1020x521.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-160x82.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-800x409.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-768x392.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1200x613.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1920x981.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you.jpg 1954w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few paces away, Sansa cries over Theon and pins a wolf emblem onto his corpse. After a messy life of not belonging, he's finally an honorary Stark.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111603\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/happy-clap-tears-cry.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"248\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fun fact: The actor who played Theon is pop star Lily Allen's baby brother, Alfie. She wrote a whole song about what a lazy stoner he is:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3bXxo5QFF88\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyway, back to the mass funeral pyres. Dany is having a lot of feels as she Jorah's body burns.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111604\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/friend-zone-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Guess whose body isn't burning up right now? Ghost's! He lives! (Minus an ear.) Phew!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111605\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-1020x769.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"483\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-1020x769.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-160x121.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-800x603.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-768x579.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-1200x905.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost.jpg 1318w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, in the woods somewhere, Nymeria, Arya's dire wolf, continues to mind her business. May that random fire god Melisandre was obsessed with protect them both.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, after spending all day watching their friends burn up, everyone feels really awkward. There's no precedent for how to act after barely surviving a zombie apocalypse. Finally, someone has a genius idea: LET'S ALL GET FIRST-WEEK-AT-COLLEGE WASTED!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111609\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/chug-drink-drunk-2.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"267\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But Dany is too paranoid about people liking Jon more than her to party. In the interest of prematurely recruiting allies, she randomly makes Gendry a lord. Every drunk person in the room thinks, \u003cem>Weird flex, but okay.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a corner, Tormund and Sansa peer pressure Jon into doing a keg stand. At first, Jon resists.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"Vomiting is not celebrating.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"Yes, it is.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Glad that's settled.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon toasts to the Dragon Queen. Dany quickly changes the toast dedication to Arya Stark, \"the hero of Winterfell.\" THAT'S RIGHT! SAY HER NAME! REJOICE IN IT!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111610\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/arya-dancing.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of cute dancing videos of GoT actors, this video of Lyanna Mormont circulated last week...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/rmlundyjr/status/1124439635353133057\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...before she confirmed it wasn't actually her. But we can still pretend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Everyone is tanked, but Tormund most of all. The ratio between wine consumed and wine spilled is about one to one.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111611\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tormund-chug.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111612\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tormund-spill.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111613\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/spill-torm.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">At a nearby table, Jamie, Tyrion and Brienne play a drinking game that involves guessing facts about each other. It doesn't take long for this to get extremely awkward.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion [to Brienne]:\u003c/strong> \"You’re a virgin!!!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Brienne:\u003c/strong> \"...I have to piss.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You know what this uncomfortable exchange needs? A sh*t-faced Tormund, that's what!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Sh*t-Faced Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"We did it! We faced those icy f*cks, looked right into their blue eyes, and here we are! Now which of you cowards shit in my pants?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>No one laughs because they're all lame.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">When Brienne leaves (to piss, I'm guessing), Tormund thinks, \u003cem>This is my chance!\u003c/em> Jamie stops him with a \u003cem>Not so fast, buddy!\u003c/em> Ooo, this love triangle is heating up again! (Which means I get to force you to look at my Photoshop masterpiece once more!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1020x680.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1200x800.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1920x1280.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie.jpg 2000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Cut to Tormund drunk-sobbing about losing the battle for Brienne's heart. \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111615\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tormund-crying.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyone else think this scene has a similar emotional pull as the final scene in \u003cem>Call Me By Your Name\u003c/em>? No? Okay, cool.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111614\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/call-me-by-your-name-crying.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"540\" height=\"210\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">But don't cry for Tormund, Argentina. He ends up snapping out of it within a handful of seconds and hooking up with some townie. Good for him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, Gendry finds Arya and begins to worship her, as he should:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Gendry:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I'm in love you! You're the GOAT! I want you to be my lady 'cause I'm a lord now! Will you marry me?!?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-37158\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/diss.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"267\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sorry. Arya's already married to revenge and murder.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back inside, Brienne is about to turn in for the night and watch a \u003cem>Great British Baking Show\u003c/em> marathon, when a drunk Jamie shows up. He starts complaining about how hot it is and starts taking off his clothes. Very smooth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/gilly-raise-eyebrows-wiig-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"180\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Then he pointedly asks if Brienne likes Tormund. Brienne is out here inspiring grown men to cry into fireplaces and get wildly jealous over her. This is why we are all members of the Brienne of Tarth fan club. (If you're not, please see yourself out.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamie continues complaining about how hot it is and fumbles with undoing the knots of his shirt. Then, he tries taking off Brienne's top!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111616\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/looking-glasses.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"206\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She stops him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106326\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/angry-birds-disappointed-sad-happy-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"350\" height=\"263\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And then does it herself!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106502\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/horny-old-lady-computer-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"338\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Way to take back your agency, Brienne!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamie says, \"I've never slept with a knight before.\" Well, you better buckle up then!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-full wp-image-38275 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_n19y4rrbwl1rrx588o1_500.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"464\" height=\"328\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In another bedroom, Dany finds Jon and asks if he's drunk. He says no, but this stumble says otherwise.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111617\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/got-drunj.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They try to answer a question that's been on both of their minds. No, not which one of them should sit on the Iron Throne. The question of: Can they boink without gagging, now that they know they're aunt and nephew? Only one way to find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After a valiant tongue wrestling effort, they find that incest is not an aphrodisiac after all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107348\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/shrink-sign-language.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"268\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Feeling rejected, Dany's insecurities get the best of her and she demands that Jon never tell anyone who he really is... or else. Jon tries to calm her down with some kumbaya talk, but it doesn't work... at all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"You are my queen. Nothing will change that. And they are my family. We can live together.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong> \"We can. I’ve just told you how.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Essentially, my way or \u003cdel>the highway \u003c/del>I'll have Drogon toast all of y'all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The next day, Arya corners Jon and invites him to a Starks-only meeting.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111618\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/got-gf.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The theme: We hate your girlfriend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Arya and Sansa take turns telling him the progeny of Ned Stark rule and everyone else drools, especially Dany. Before Jon can even get comfortable in the agony of whether to tell them the truth or not, Bran blurts out, \"It's your choice.\" (And that's been this episode's Bran-freaks-everyone-out moment!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon makes them pinky promise that they won't tell anyone and then proceeds to tell them everything, but the camera cuts away before we can witness any \u003cem>So-wait-you-shtooped-your-aunt?!?!\u003c/em> reaction shots!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98857\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/annoyed-kim.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"485\" height=\"275\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The following day, Clegane and Arya run into each other on the road. They're both heading back to King's Landing to settle some unfinished business (my theory: Clegane will have a final battle with his brother, the Mountain, and Arya is gonna slip one of her masks on and try to kill Cersei). They both agree they don't plan on ever coming back to Winterfell. (Another theory, which I hope isn't true: they're both going to die in the next two episodes.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97258\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/britney-sad-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Arya and Clegane aren't the only ones leaving town; almost everyone is heading south to tell Cersei that she's mean. Tormund bids Jon adieu and takes Ghost with him. (Jon, be a better dire wolf parent! You can't just keep abandoning him like this!) Jon also says goodbye to Sam, who's still alive somehow and also managed to get his girlfriend pregnant again. Check out his Yup-I-did-the-sex-again face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111619\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/yup-i-did-the-sex.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before Tyrion rides off, he tries to find out why Sansa is acting super weird and staring off into the distance. Internally, Sansa thinks to herself: \u003cem>Don't say it don't say it don't say it.\u003c/em> Externally, Sansa says: \u003cem>So here are my top 10 reasons why I hate Dany, who's Jon's aunt by the way.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111620\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/gwen-stefani-oops.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As the fleet makes its way south, Dany and Drogon fly beside Rhaegal, who is healing after the battle and learning how to fly again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-62786\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/02/awww.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Out of nowhere, an arrow punctures Rhaegal's chest! And wing! And throat! And Rhaegal gurgles all the way down to a watery death!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>WHAT DID I SAY, \u003cem>GOT\u003c/em> WRITERS?!?!?!?!?!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I am beside myself. I...can't.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111621\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/feels-waves-emotional.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The arrow came from stupid Euron Greyjoy! And he's not done being a dick. He obliterates Dany's entire fleet too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111622\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/explode-ship-arrow-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, y'all thought this was just a sleepy hangover episode?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Hold on. Faxing Arya so she can put Euron's name on her kill list.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in King's Landing, Euron tells Cersei about murdering Rhaegal. Her sociopathic response: \"That must've been glorious.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Me to no one:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111625\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/im-going-to-have-to-kill-her.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To make matters worse, Euron managed to capture Missendei and now she's Cersei's prisoner. This is not going to end well.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109224\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/02/prince-smh.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"418\" height=\"480\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Dany vows to obliterate King's Landing, civilians and all. After failing to talk her down, Lord Varys tells Tyrion that Cersei is feeling herself too much and showing the signs of a tyrant. He suggests they put their support behind Jon because he's a man and he's likable and he's someone you could have a beer with. Hmm, this all sounds oddly familiar...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back in Winterfell, Jamie's complicated feelings for Cersei drive him out of Brienne's bed and on the road back to King's Landing. Brienne catches him and begs him to stay.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Brienne:\u003c/strong> \"You don’t need to die with her. Stay here. Stay with me. Please. Stay.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jamie:\u003c/strong> \"She’s hateful and so am I.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He flips her the deuces and trots off, leaving Brienne to rain tears and snot everywhere. She's mourning their cute romance, but also the good side of him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106655\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/sad-wilfred-doctor-who-crying-old-man-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"147\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the castle walls of King's Landing, Dany and co. have a stand-off with Cersie and co. Tyrion and Cersei's creepy assistant try bargaining.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tyrion: \u003c/strong>\u003cem>Surrender or else general bad things will happen.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Cersei's Creepy Assistant:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Surrender or else general bad things will happen AND Cersei will throw Dany's BFF, Missandei, to her death right now.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Ok then!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Tyrion tries his Plan B.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, Cersei! Let's skip the whole battle thing. You want your unborn child to live, right?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I\u003c/em> \u003cem>couldn't give a sh*t.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The Mountain chops off Missendei's head and both her head and body plummet off the castle wall right in front of Dany and Grey Worm. This means war.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111627\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-means-war-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 3 Recap: Great Balls of Fire\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, all hell broke loose.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This Lyanna Mormont moment captures the essence of the Battle of Winterfell:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111414\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/lyanna-mormont-battle-of-winterfell.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone's favorite middle schooler ended up dying, along with Jorah, Melisandre, pretty much all the Dothraki, Theon and some other randos.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111424\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-beer.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, and ARYA MOTHER F*CKING STARK SINGLE-HANDEDLY KILLED THE NIGHT KING! If you missed that moment or just want to see it again, here it is, complete with added celebratory scenes from \u003cem>The Truman Show\u003c/em> because I'm random.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>Now with the existential threat of the Night King and his dead army gone, what in the world is going to happen next? Let's find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's the morning after the Battle of Winterfell. The camera slowly pans up the body of a fallen hero. The MVP. It's obviously Lil Lyanna Mormont.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, it's Jorah?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany weeps over him while feeling really badly about friend-zoning him so hard while he was alive.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany, I'ma let you finish, but LYANNA HAD ONE OF THE MOST HEART-WRENCHING \u003cem>GAME OF THRONES\u003c/em> DEATHS OF ALL TIME!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111602\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1020x521.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"327\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1020x521.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-160x82.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-800x409.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-768x392.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1200x613.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you-1920x981.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ima-let-you.jpg 1954w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few paces away, Sansa cries over Theon and pins a wolf emblem onto his corpse. After a messy life of not belonging, he's finally an honorary Stark.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111603\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/happy-clap-tears-cry.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"248\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fun fact: The actor who played Theon is pop star Lily Allen's baby brother, Alfie. She wrote a whole song about what a lazy stoner he is:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/3bXxo5QFF88'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/3bXxo5QFF88'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>Anyway, back to the mass funeral pyres. Dany is having a lot of feels as she Jorah's body burns.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111604\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/friend-zone-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Guess whose body isn't burning up right now? Ghost's! He lives! (Minus an ear.) Phew!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111605\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-1020x769.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"483\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-1020x769.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-160x121.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-800x603.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-768x579.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost-1200x905.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ghost.jpg 1318w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, in the woods somewhere, Nymeria, Arya's dire wolf, continues to mind her business. May that random fire god Melisandre was obsessed with protect them both.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, after spending all day watching their friends burn up, everyone feels really awkward. There's no precedent for how to act after barely surviving a zombie apocalypse. Finally, someone has a genius idea: LET'S ALL GET FIRST-WEEK-AT-COLLEGE WASTED!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111609\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/chug-drink-drunk-2.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"267\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But Dany is too paranoid about people liking Jon more than her to party. In the interest of prematurely recruiting allies, she randomly makes Gendry a lord. Every drunk person in the room thinks, \u003cem>Weird flex, but okay.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a corner, Tormund and Sansa peer pressure Jon into doing a keg stand. At first, Jon resists.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"Vomiting is not celebrating.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"Yes, it is.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Glad that's settled.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon toasts to the Dragon Queen. Dany quickly changes the toast dedication to Arya Stark, \"the hero of Winterfell.\" THAT'S RIGHT! SAY HER NAME! REJOICE IN IT!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111610\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/arya-dancing.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of cute dancing videos of GoT actors, this video of Lyanna Mormont circulated last week...\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>...before she confirmed it wasn't actually her. But we can still pretend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Everyone is tanked, but Tormund most of all. The ratio between wine consumed and wine spilled is about one to one.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111611\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tormund-chug.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111612\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tormund-spill.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111613\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/spill-torm.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">At a nearby table, Jamie, Tyrion and Brienne play a drinking game that involves guessing facts about each other. It doesn't take long for this to get extremely awkward.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion [to Brienne]:\u003c/strong> \"You’re a virgin!!!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Brienne:\u003c/strong> \"...I have to piss.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>You know what this uncomfortable exchange needs? A sh*t-faced Tormund, that's what!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Sh*t-Faced Tormund:\u003c/strong> \"We did it! We faced those icy f*cks, looked right into their blue eyes, and here we are! Now which of you cowards shit in my pants?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>No one laughs because they're all lame.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">When Brienne leaves (to piss, I'm guessing), Tormund thinks, \u003cem>This is my chance!\u003c/em> Jamie stops him with a \u003cem>Not so fast, buddy!\u003c/em> Ooo, this love triangle is heating up again! (Which means I get to force you to look at my Photoshop masterpiece once more!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1020x680.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1200x800.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie-1920x1280.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/brienne-meme-game-of-thrones-tormund-jamie.jpg 2000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Cut to Tormund drunk-sobbing about losing the battle for Brienne's heart. \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111615\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tormund-crying.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Anyone else think this scene has a similar emotional pull as the final scene in \u003cem>Call Me By Your Name\u003c/em>? No? Okay, cool.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111614\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/call-me-by-your-name-crying.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"540\" height=\"210\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">But don't cry for Tormund, Argentina. He ends up snapping out of it within a handful of seconds and hooking up with some townie. Good for him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, Gendry finds Arya and begins to worship her, as he should:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Gendry:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I'm in love you! You're the GOAT! I want you to be my lady 'cause I'm a lord now! Will you marry me?!?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-37158\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/diss.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"267\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sorry. Arya's already married to revenge and murder.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back inside, Brienne is about to turn in for the night and watch a \u003cem>Great British Baking Show\u003c/em> marathon, when a drunk Jamie shows up. He starts complaining about how hot it is and starts taking off his clothes. Very smooth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97246\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/gilly-raise-eyebrows-wiig-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"180\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Then he pointedly asks if Brienne likes Tormund. Brienne is out here inspiring grown men to cry into fireplaces and get wildly jealous over her. This is why we are all members of the Brienne of Tarth fan club. (If you're not, please see yourself out.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamie continues complaining about how hot it is and fumbles with undoing the knots of his shirt. Then, he tries taking off Brienne's top!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111616\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/looking-glasses.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"206\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She stops him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106326\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/angry-birds-disappointed-sad-happy-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"350\" height=\"263\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And then does it herself!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106502\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/horny-old-lady-computer-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"338\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Way to take back your agency, Brienne!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamie says, \"I've never slept with a knight before.\" Well, you better buckle up then!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"size-full wp-image-38275 aligncenter\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_n19y4rrbwl1rrx588o1_500.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"464\" height=\"328\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In another bedroom, Dany finds Jon and asks if he's drunk. He says no, but this stumble says otherwise.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111617\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/got-drunj.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They try to answer a question that's been on both of their minds. No, not which one of them should sit on the Iron Throne. The question of: Can they boink without gagging, now that they know they're aunt and nephew? Only one way to find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After a valiant tongue wrestling effort, they find that incest is not an aphrodisiac after all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107348\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/shrink-sign-language.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"268\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Feeling rejected, Dany's insecurities get the best of her and she demands that Jon never tell anyone who he really is... or else. Jon tries to calm her down with some kumbaya talk, but it doesn't work... at all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Jon:\u003c/strong> \"You are my queen. Nothing will change that. And they are my family. We can live together.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Dany:\u003c/strong> \"We can. I’ve just told you how.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Essentially, my way or \u003cdel>the highway \u003c/del>I'll have Drogon toast all of y'all.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The next day, Arya corners Jon and invites him to a Starks-only meeting.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111618\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/got-gf.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The theme: We hate your girlfriend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Arya and Sansa take turns telling him the progeny of Ned Stark rule and everyone else drools, especially Dany. Before Jon can even get comfortable in the agony of whether to tell them the truth or not, Bran blurts out, \"It's your choice.\" (And that's been this episode's Bran-freaks-everyone-out moment!)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jon makes them pinky promise that they won't tell anyone and then proceeds to tell them everything, but the camera cuts away before we can witness any \u003cem>So-wait-you-shtooped-your-aunt?!?!\u003c/em> reaction shots!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98857\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/annoyed-kim.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"485\" height=\"275\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The following day, Clegane and Arya run into each other on the road. They're both heading back to King's Landing to settle some unfinished business (my theory: Clegane will have a final battle with his brother, the Mountain, and Arya is gonna slip one of her masks on and try to kill Cersei). They both agree they don't plan on ever coming back to Winterfell. (Another theory, which I hope isn't true: they're both going to die in the next two episodes.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97258\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/britney-sad-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Arya and Clegane aren't the only ones leaving town; almost everyone is heading south to tell Cersei that she's mean. Tormund bids Jon adieu and takes Ghost with him. (Jon, be a better dire wolf parent! You can't just keep abandoning him like this!) Jon also says goodbye to Sam, who's still alive somehow and also managed to get his girlfriend pregnant again. Check out his Yup-I-did-the-sex-again face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111619\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/yup-i-did-the-sex.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Before Tyrion rides off, he tries to find out why Sansa is acting super weird and staring off into the distance. Internally, Sansa thinks to herself: \u003cem>Don't say it don't say it don't say it.\u003c/em> Externally, Sansa says: \u003cem>So here are my top 10 reasons why I hate Dany, who's Jon's aunt by the way.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111620\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/gwen-stefani-oops.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As the fleet makes its way south, Dany and Drogon fly beside Rhaegal, who is healing after the battle and learning how to fly again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-62786\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/02/awww.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Out of nowhere, an arrow punctures Rhaegal's chest! And wing! And throat! And Rhaegal gurgles all the way down to a watery death!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>WHAT DID I SAY, \u003cem>GOT\u003c/em> WRITERS?!?!?!?!?!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I am beside myself. I...can't.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111621\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/feels-waves-emotional.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The arrow came from stupid Euron Greyjoy! And he's not done being a dick. He obliterates Dany's entire fleet too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111622\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/explode-ship-arrow-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, y'all thought this was just a sleepy hangover episode?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Hold on. Faxing Arya so she can put Euron's name on her kill list.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in King's Landing, Euron tells Cersei about murdering Rhaegal. Her sociopathic response: \"That must've been glorious.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Me to no one:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111625\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/im-going-to-have-to-kill-her.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To make matters worse, Euron managed to capture Missendei and now she's Cersei's prisoner. This is not going to end well.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109224\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/02/prince-smh.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"418\" height=\"480\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Dany vows to obliterate King's Landing, civilians and all. After failing to talk her down, Lord Varys tells Tyrion that Cersei is feeling herself too much and showing the signs of a tyrant. He suggests they put their support behind Jon because he's a man and he's likable and he's someone you could have a beer with. Hmm, this all sounds oddly familiar...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back in Winterfell, Jamie's complicated feelings for Cersei drive him out of Brienne's bed and on the road back to King's Landing. Brienne catches him and begs him to stay.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Brienne:\u003c/strong> \"You don’t need to die with her. Stay here. Stay with me. Please. Stay.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jamie:\u003c/strong> \"She’s hateful and so am I.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He flips her the deuces and trots off, leaving Brienne to rain tears and snot everywhere. She's mourning their cute romance, but also the good side of him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106655\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/sad-wilfred-doctor-who-crying-old-man-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"147\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the castle walls of King's Landing, Dany and co. have a stand-off with Cersie and co. Tyrion and Cersei's creepy assistant try bargaining.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Tyrion: \u003c/strong>\u003cem>Surrender or else general bad things will happen.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Cersei's Creepy Assistant:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Surrender or else general bad things will happen AND Cersei will throw Dany's BFF, Missandei, to her death right now.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Ok then!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Tyrion tries his Plan B.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, Cersei! Let's skip the whole battle thing. You want your unborn child to live, right?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Cersei:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I\u003c/em> \u003cem>couldn't give a sh*t.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">The Mountain chops off Missendei's head and both her head and body plummet off the castle wall right in front of Dany and Grey Worm. This means war.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111627\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/this-means-war-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111406/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-3-recap-great-balls-of-fire\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 3 Recap: Great Balls of Fire\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Les Miserables' Episode 4 Recap: Like A Virgin",
"title": "'Les Miserables' Episode 4 Recap: Like A Virgin",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111351/les-miserables-bbc-pbs-episode-3-recap-i-will-follow-him\">the previous episode of \u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111351/les-miserables-bbc-pbs-episode-3-recap-i-will-follow-him\">Les Miserables\u003c/a>, \u003c/i>I learned that the actress who plays Fantine is Phil Collins' daughter. My mind is still very blown by that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98555\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/mind-blown-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"315\" height=\"210\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, and some plot-related stuff happened too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A random dude I call Jean Fauxjean was accused of being the real Jean Valjean and was almost sent to some dungeon... until the real Jean Valjean barked at everyone...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111382\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/ENOUGH-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...and revealed his true identity.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111383\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/real-slim-shady.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"334\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Going from sentenced to free in a millisecond, Jean Fauxjean wasn't sure how to feel.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111384\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/oprah-what-is-going-on-confused.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On the flip side, a feeling I am VERY sure about is that I want to smash a cream pie right into the middle of Ms. Creepy Face's...um, face for refusing to let Fantine see Cosette before her death.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111403\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pie-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"489\" height=\"270\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, yeah, spoiler alert: Fantine is long gone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111386\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/and-now-im-dead.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"430\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Thanks to a little mouth chisel, Jean Valjean broke out of prison and also broke Cosette out of her own prison by hulking out on Mr. Olivia Colman.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111393\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/hulk-punch-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cosette couldn't believe her good fortune.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111394\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/kacey-musgraves-what.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"286\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alas, it was short-lived, thanks to a neighbor who refused to mind her own business.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111395\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/nosy-neighbor-lady.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"271\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cosette, who has earned the right to sling curse words, called this neighbor a \"nosy old bitch.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111396\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cussing-olsen-twin.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"390\" height=\"428\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I'd like to hear which curse words Cosette has reserved for Javert because he was back on his BS, chasing Jean and Cosette all over town, even banging on the door of a convent and demanding that a nun turn them over. The head nun thought about it for a second before saying:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-38850\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500.gif 245w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-32x32.gif 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-50x50.gif 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-64x64.gif 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-96x96.gif 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-128x128.gif 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-150x150.gif 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 245px) 100vw, 245px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Now that we're all caught up, let's find out what other stressful, messed up stuff \u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em> has in store for us this week. On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We find a teen Cosette hanging out with some friends inside their convent dorm. Cosette has friends! No one is whipping her! (We have to celebrate any ray of sunshine in this brutal ass show.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cosette's friends start talking about how excited they are to graduate and start sleeping around with their hot cousins. Either Cosette is not down with incest or Jean Valjean has failed to give her the birds-and-the-bees talk.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111566\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/what-is-sex-les-mis.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Her friends don't have time to explain what sex is and why they kind of want to do it with their relatives because a nun comes in and orders them to pray. A nun in the fly-est headwear ever, I might add!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111567\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/nun-hat-les-mis.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"752\" height=\"448\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/nun-hat-les-mis.jpg 752w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/nun-hat-les-mis-160x95.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 752px) 100vw, 752px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Remember what I said about reveling in whatever scrap of sunshine this show throws our way? Jean Valjean is totally on board with that. Look at him! So happy! And not a Javert in sight!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111568\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/les-mis-jean-happy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The main reason he's stoked on life is that Cosette is coming over for brunch. These two have more than earned bottomless mimosas.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111569\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/bottomless-mimosas-brunch-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"426\" height=\"426\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But Cosette is not in the mood for celebratory drinks. Now that she knows a little bit about sex, she's less jazzed about becoming a celibate nun for life.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cosette:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I want to see the world!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jean Valjean:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>But the world is trash and full of garbage people! Remember being a child slave???\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cosette:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>That was probably just an anomaly!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jean Valjean:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Tell that to Fantine's missing two front teeth! Why don't you want to stick to our plan of watching me die here and then dying later on as a really old virgin?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cosette:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Because that sounds depressing?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They agree to disagree.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Javert receives a medal of \u003cdel>dis\u003c/del>honor for being great at ruining lives over the pettiest of crimes. He tries to have a special chapeau moment like the nun from earlier in the episode and fails.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111570\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fail-les-mis.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"434\" height=\"388\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fail-les-mis.jpg 434w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fail-les-mis-160x143.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 434px) 100vw, 434px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When Javert gets back to his office, all his coworker buddies are like, \u003cem>Way to go, dude! Let's party!\u003c/em> But Javert is in full pout mode. \"I shall never be in peace until Jean Valjean is back in chains!\" It was one little coin and one measly piece of bread. GET OVER IT!!!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a church nearby, a grown-up Marius Pontmercy prays that all of that wine-drinking he did as a child didn't affect his brain too much.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110985\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/les-miserables-wine-drinking.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On his way out, Marius meets an old man who really wants to gossip.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Old Gossip:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Breaking news! Your dad used to watch you every week from behind that pillar! Napoleon actually rules! And your grandfather is a piece of merde!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Marius is as mind blown as I am over the whole Phil Collins daughter thing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98555\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/mind-blown-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"315\" height=\"210\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Marius marches on over to his grandfather's house and lets him have it:\u003cem> I thought the thing you were most terrible at was applying makeup, but I was wrong! You're even worse at being a decent human being! P.S. The king can choke!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Gramps serves Marius an eviction notice.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111590\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/get-out-cersei-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the convent, Jean Valjean is now in support of Cosette not dying a very old virgin, so they move out. Cosette is immediately taken aback by all the beggars, prostitutes and dead bodies in the streets. But she's in much better spirits once she gets to a gentrified neighborhood and sees how Instagrammable the door to their new apartment is. Jean Valjean has taste!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111571\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/door-les-mid.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1018\" height=\"462\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/door-les-mid.png 1018w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/door-les-mid-160x73.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/door-les-mid-800x363.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/door-les-mid-768x349.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1018px) 100vw, 1018px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a less photogenic part of Paris, Marius moves into a slum and meets his new landlord, who just so happens to be the \"nosy old bitch\" from the last episode!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xqVMhN-Yit4\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, while sitting in his apartment trying to decide whether he's #TeamRoyalism, #TeamNapoleon or #TeamDemocracy, a creepy finger pokes through the wall, as if to say *Adele voice* \u003cem>Hello from the other siiiiiiide\u003c/em>!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111585\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/creepy-finger-les-mis.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's a girl who randomly offers a little striptease. Based on how small the world of this show is, I bet it's one of Olivia Colman's daughters. Do not want!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111572\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/hard-pass-do-not-want-no.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Instagrammable Door HQ, Cosette is already unsatisfied with her new life. She misses chatting about sex with girls her own age. Where's AOL Instant Messenger when you need it?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She also wants less virgin-y clothes, so Jean takes her shopping and fake smiles all the way through her makeover montage.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111582\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fake-smile-les-mis.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the Luxembourg Gardens, Marius spots Cosette debuting her new look, intuits that she's an antsy virgin like him and starts stalking her. After a handkerchief falls, Marius rushes to return it, but not before taking a big, horny sniff of it first. Cosette is like, \u003cem>Chill, that's my dad's\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111574\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/smell-foot.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"522\" height=\"303\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The park is teeming with cops, so Jean Valjean rushes Cosette home, which evokes a bratty tantrum.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cosette:\u003c/strong> \"This place is like a prison!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jean Valjean:\u003c/strong> \"You have no idea what a prison is!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cut to Jean waking Cosette at dawn to witness a procession of chained prisoners being abused and dragged through the streets. Unfortunately, instead of taking away a better understanding of the prison industrial complex and how cruel humans can be to each other, the takeaway for Cosette is \u003cem>Ewwwwwww, they're gross!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cosette:\u003c/strong> \"I think if I crossed paths with one of those men, I would die, just from looking them in the face.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean is too busy blinking in disbelief to respond to her convict hateration.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111581\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/blink-guy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"195\" height=\"229\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at a brothel nightclub, Marius is scandalized by being in the midst of Ms. Wall Finger and a lot of other people who've had sex before. He rushes home and tries to sleep it off, only to wake to Ms. Wall Finger in his room. Did she not see the doormat?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111583\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again-1020x1020.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again-1020x1020.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again-160x160.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again-800x800.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again-768x768.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again-1200x1200.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After seducing him doesn't work, Ms. Wall Finger hands him a note from her dad that reads: \u003cem>Give me money just cause. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Marius hands over some change and a little extra for Ms. Wall Finger. Moments later, Marius looks through the Adele peephole and watches her father take her coin away and beat her. Her father is none other than—we all guessed it—Mr. Colman.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111591\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/no-god-please-no-the-office.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"240\" height=\"196\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On the other side of town, Cosette is still ranting about how yucky incarcerated men are and how they must be monsters to be treated like that, when Ms. Wall Finger rolls up with a note from her dad asking for money. Jean Valjean promises to come over later that day. Well, I hope you all enjoyed those ray of sunshine moments earlier because things are about to get \u003cdel>les\u003c/del> miserable\u003cdel>s\u003c/del> again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106653\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/why-conan-crying-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cosette tries to warn Jean that Ms. Wall Finger gives off a very bad vibe, but Jean thinks she's just being bougie again and tells her they're definitely going over there later to get scammed, blackmailed and possibly even murdered.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few moments after stepping into the Colmans' shack and realizing who they are, Jean takes a moment to consider what an unforced error he just crafted for himself.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111592\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ive-made-a-huge-mistake-arrested-development.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"283\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean promises to return later that evening to pay a bunch of hush money and then gets Cosette the hell out of there. Behind the wall, Marius overhears the Colmans plotting to murder Jean. But I'm not that stressed 'cause surely Marius will just track Cosette and Jean down and warn them, right?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>UGHHHH. MARIUS GOES TO JAVERT. YOU HAD ONE JOB, MARIUS! AND YOU SCREWED IT UP! YOU'RE A VIRGIN WHO CAN'T DRIVE! *PRIMAL SCREAM*\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Javert advises Marius to take two guns and watch from his Adele peephole until Mr. Colman and his buddies start trying to kill Jean. Then, Marius should shoot off a round or two in the ceiling. Ummm, can someone take away Javert's medal of honor now? This plan is bonkers.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, when Jean arrives, he's quickly surrounded by goons. They tie him down and Mr. Colman taunts Jean with a hot poker and rambles about saving Marius' dad back in the day. Marius hears this and believes the tall tale because he's a dumb virgin.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111593\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/youre-stupid-drunk-parks-and-rec-amy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"130\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I've had enough of this episode and so has Jean, who beats everyone up with only one hand. For good measure, he takes the hot poker and burns himself on the arm just to let everyone know he used to be this guy:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-110983\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1020x465.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"292\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1020x465.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-160x73.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-800x365.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-768x350.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1200x547.png 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM.png 1276w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In summary:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111594\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/dont-fuck-with-me-fellas.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"463\" height=\"260\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Marius finally decides to shoot his guns (thanks for nothing, bro) and the place is stormed by Javert and a flood of cops. All the goons are still spooked by the maniac who just burned himself with a hot poker, so they just run around in circles until they're arrested. Jean, on the other hand, doesn't have time for a third incarceration so he does what he has to do.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111595\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/jump-out-window-break-glass.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"222\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That evening, at the prison, Javert visits Mr. Colman and demands to know everything. Thank goodness this episode is over because all this stress is driving me to drink!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111596\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/stressed-out-margarita-bad-girls-club.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: Pretty Much Everyone. \u003c/strong>I don't feel like I even need to explain this one.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: Old Gossip. \u003c/strong>This random guy held onto some very hot goss for over a decade and then unleashed it at exactly the right time. He's messy. He's random. And I love him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>BRONZE: Cosette.\u003c/strong> Deciding not to die an old virgin was a solid choice. Congrats.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>SILVER: That Nun's Hat. \u003c/strong>Nope, I'm still not over it. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cstrong>GOLD: Jean Valjean\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">. \u003c/span>\u003c/strong>\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">He's a great guardian and a lovable gentle giant (when he's not burning off his own flesh), but this award is mostly for his ability to find such an Instagrammable apartment. Double tap!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/game-of-thrones\">\u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>Previous Recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111351/les-miserables-bbc-pbs-episode-3-recap-i-will-follow-him\">'Les Miserables' Episode 3 Recap: I Will Follow Him\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111154/les-miserables-episode-2-pbs-bbc-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi\">'Les Miserables' Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-Vous Coucher Avec Moi?\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/110513/les-miserables-pbs-bbc-episode-1-recap-un-break-my-heart\">'Les Miserables' Episode 1 Recap: Un-Break My Heart\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Need a laugh or two after this week's stressful episode? This recap has your back!",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111351/les-miserables-bbc-pbs-episode-3-recap-i-will-follow-him\">the previous episode of \u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111351/les-miserables-bbc-pbs-episode-3-recap-i-will-follow-him\">Les Miserables\u003c/a>, \u003c/i>I learned that the actress who plays Fantine is Phil Collins' daughter. My mind is still very blown by that.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98555\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/mind-blown-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"315\" height=\"210\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, and some plot-related stuff happened too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A random dude I call Jean Fauxjean was accused of being the real Jean Valjean and was almost sent to some dungeon... until the real Jean Valjean barked at everyone...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111382\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/ENOUGH-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>...and revealed his true identity.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111383\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/real-slim-shady.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"334\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Going from sentenced to free in a millisecond, Jean Fauxjean wasn't sure how to feel.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111384\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/oprah-what-is-going-on-confused.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On the flip side, a feeling I am VERY sure about is that I want to smash a cream pie right into the middle of Ms. Creepy Face's...um, face for refusing to let Fantine see Cosette before her death.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111403\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pie-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"489\" height=\"270\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, yeah, spoiler alert: Fantine is long gone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111386\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/and-now-im-dead.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"430\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Thanks to a little mouth chisel, Jean Valjean broke out of prison and also broke Cosette out of her own prison by hulking out on Mr. Olivia Colman.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111393\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/hulk-punch-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cosette couldn't believe her good fortune.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111394\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/kacey-musgraves-what.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"286\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alas, it was short-lived, thanks to a neighbor who refused to mind her own business.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111395\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/nosy-neighbor-lady.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"271\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cosette, who has earned the right to sling curse words, called this neighbor a \"nosy old bitch.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111396\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cussing-olsen-twin.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"390\" height=\"428\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I'd like to hear which curse words Cosette has reserved for Javert because he was back on his BS, chasing Jean and Cosette all over town, even banging on the door of a convent and demanding that a nun turn them over. The head nun thought about it for a second before saying:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-38850\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500.gif 245w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-32x32.gif 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-50x50.gif 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-64x64.gif 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-96x96.gif 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-128x128.gif 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-150x150.gif 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 245px) 100vw, 245px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Now that we're all caught up, let's find out what other stressful, messed up stuff \u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em> has in store for us this week. On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We find a teen Cosette hanging out with some friends inside their convent dorm. Cosette has friends! No one is whipping her! (We have to celebrate any ray of sunshine in this brutal ass show.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cosette's friends start talking about how excited they are to graduate and start sleeping around with their hot cousins. Either Cosette is not down with incest or Jean Valjean has failed to give her the birds-and-the-bees talk.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111566\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/what-is-sex-les-mis.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Her friends don't have time to explain what sex is and why they kind of want to do it with their relatives because a nun comes in and orders them to pray. A nun in the fly-est headwear ever, I might add!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111567\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/nun-hat-les-mis.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"752\" height=\"448\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/nun-hat-les-mis.jpg 752w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/nun-hat-les-mis-160x95.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 752px) 100vw, 752px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Remember what I said about reveling in whatever scrap of sunshine this show throws our way? Jean Valjean is totally on board with that. Look at him! So happy! And not a Javert in sight!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111568\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/les-mis-jean-happy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The main reason he's stoked on life is that Cosette is coming over for brunch. These two have more than earned bottomless mimosas.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111569\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/bottomless-mimosas-brunch-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"426\" height=\"426\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But Cosette is not in the mood for celebratory drinks. Now that she knows a little bit about sex, she's less jazzed about becoming a celibate nun for life.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cosette:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>I want to see the world!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jean Valjean:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>But the world is trash and full of garbage people! Remember being a child slave???\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cosette:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>That was probably just an anomaly!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jean Valjean:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Tell that to Fantine's missing two front teeth! Why don't you want to stick to our plan of watching me die here and then dying later on as a really old virgin?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cosette:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Because that sounds depressing?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They agree to disagree.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Across town, Javert receives a medal of \u003cdel>dis\u003c/del>honor for being great at ruining lives over the pettiest of crimes. He tries to have a special chapeau moment like the nun from earlier in the episode and fails.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111570\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fail-les-mis.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"434\" height=\"388\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fail-les-mis.jpg 434w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fail-les-mis-160x143.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 434px) 100vw, 434px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When Javert gets back to his office, all his coworker buddies are like, \u003cem>Way to go, dude! Let's party!\u003c/em> But Javert is in full pout mode. \"I shall never be in peace until Jean Valjean is back in chains!\" It was one little coin and one measly piece of bread. GET OVER IT!!!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a church nearby, a grown-up Marius Pontmercy prays that all of that wine-drinking he did as a child didn't affect his brain too much.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110985\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/les-miserables-wine-drinking.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On his way out, Marius meets an old man who really wants to gossip.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Old Gossip:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Breaking news! Your dad used to watch you every week from behind that pillar! Napoleon actually rules! And your grandfather is a piece of merde!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Marius is as mind blown as I am over the whole Phil Collins daughter thing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98555\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/mind-blown-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"315\" height=\"210\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Marius marches on over to his grandfather's house and lets him have it:\u003cem> I thought the thing you were most terrible at was applying makeup, but I was wrong! You're even worse at being a decent human being! P.S. The king can choke!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Gramps serves Marius an eviction notice.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111590\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/get-out-cersei-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back at the convent, Jean Valjean is now in support of Cosette not dying a very old virgin, so they move out. Cosette is immediately taken aback by all the beggars, prostitutes and dead bodies in the streets. But she's in much better spirits once she gets to a gentrified neighborhood and sees how Instagrammable the door to their new apartment is. Jean Valjean has taste!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111571\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/door-les-mid.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1018\" height=\"462\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/door-les-mid.png 1018w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/door-les-mid-160x73.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/door-les-mid-800x363.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/door-les-mid-768x349.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1018px) 100vw, 1018px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a less photogenic part of Paris, Marius moves into a slum and meets his new landlord, who just so happens to be the \"nosy old bitch\" from the last episode!\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/xqVMhN-Yit4'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/xqVMhN-Yit4'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>That night, while sitting in his apartment trying to decide whether he's #TeamRoyalism, #TeamNapoleon or #TeamDemocracy, a creepy finger pokes through the wall, as if to say *Adele voice* \u003cem>Hello from the other siiiiiiide\u003c/em>!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111585\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/creepy-finger-les-mis.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's a girl who randomly offers a little striptease. Based on how small the world of this show is, I bet it's one of Olivia Colman's daughters. Do not want!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111572\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/hard-pass-do-not-want-no.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at Instagrammable Door HQ, Cosette is already unsatisfied with her new life. She misses chatting about sex with girls her own age. Where's AOL Instant Messenger when you need it?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She also wants less virgin-y clothes, so Jean takes her shopping and fake smiles all the way through her makeover montage.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111582\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/fake-smile-les-mis.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the Luxembourg Gardens, Marius spots Cosette debuting her new look, intuits that she's an antsy virgin like him and starts stalking her. After a handkerchief falls, Marius rushes to return it, but not before taking a big, horny sniff of it first. Cosette is like, \u003cem>Chill, that's my dad's\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111574\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/smell-foot.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"522\" height=\"303\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The park is teeming with cops, so Jean Valjean rushes Cosette home, which evokes a bratty tantrum.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cosette:\u003c/strong> \"This place is like a prison!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jean Valjean:\u003c/strong> \"You have no idea what a prison is!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cut to Jean waking Cosette at dawn to witness a procession of chained prisoners being abused and dragged through the streets. Unfortunately, instead of taking away a better understanding of the prison industrial complex and how cruel humans can be to each other, the takeaway for Cosette is \u003cem>Ewwwwwww, they're gross!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Cosette:\u003c/strong> \"I think if I crossed paths with one of those men, I would die, just from looking them in the face.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean is too busy blinking in disbelief to respond to her convict hateration.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111581\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/blink-guy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"195\" height=\"229\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Over at a brothel nightclub, Marius is scandalized by being in the midst of Ms. Wall Finger and a lot of other people who've had sex before. He rushes home and tries to sleep it off, only to wake to Ms. Wall Finger in his room. Did she not see the doormat?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111583\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again-1020x1020.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again-1020x1020.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again-160x160.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again-800x800.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again-768x768.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again-1200x1200.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/oh-no-not-you-again.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After seducing him doesn't work, Ms. Wall Finger hands him a note from her dad that reads: \u003cem>Give me money just cause. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Marius hands over some change and a little extra for Ms. Wall Finger. Moments later, Marius looks through the Adele peephole and watches her father take her coin away and beat her. Her father is none other than—we all guessed it—Mr. Colman.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111591\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/no-god-please-no-the-office.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"240\" height=\"196\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On the other side of town, Cosette is still ranting about how yucky incarcerated men are and how they must be monsters to be treated like that, when Ms. Wall Finger rolls up with a note from her dad asking for money. Jean Valjean promises to come over later that day. Well, I hope you all enjoyed those ray of sunshine moments earlier because things are about to get \u003cdel>les\u003c/del> miserable\u003cdel>s\u003c/del> again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106653\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/why-conan-crying-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cosette tries to warn Jean that Ms. Wall Finger gives off a very bad vibe, but Jean thinks she's just being bougie again and tells her they're definitely going over there later to get scammed, blackmailed and possibly even murdered.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few moments after stepping into the Colmans' shack and realizing who they are, Jean takes a moment to consider what an unforced error he just crafted for himself.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111592\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/ive-made-a-huge-mistake-arrested-development.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"283\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean promises to return later that evening to pay a bunch of hush money and then gets Cosette the hell out of there. Behind the wall, Marius overhears the Colmans plotting to murder Jean. But I'm not that stressed 'cause surely Marius will just track Cosette and Jean down and warn them, right?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>UGHHHH. MARIUS GOES TO JAVERT. YOU HAD ONE JOB, MARIUS! AND YOU SCREWED IT UP! YOU'RE A VIRGIN WHO CAN'T DRIVE! *PRIMAL SCREAM*\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Javert advises Marius to take two guns and watch from his Adele peephole until Mr. Colman and his buddies start trying to kill Jean. Then, Marius should shoot off a round or two in the ceiling. Ummm, can someone take away Javert's medal of honor now? This plan is bonkers.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, when Jean arrives, he's quickly surrounded by goons. They tie him down and Mr. Colman taunts Jean with a hot poker and rambles about saving Marius' dad back in the day. Marius hears this and believes the tall tale because he's a dumb virgin.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111593\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/youre-stupid-drunk-parks-and-rec-amy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"130\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I've had enough of this episode and so has Jean, who beats everyone up with only one hand. For good measure, he takes the hot poker and burns himself on the arm just to let everyone know he used to be this guy:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-110983\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1020x465.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"292\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1020x465.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-160x73.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-800x365.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-768x350.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1200x547.png 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM.png 1276w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In summary:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111594\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/dont-fuck-with-me-fellas.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"463\" height=\"260\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Marius finally decides to shoot his guns (thanks for nothing, bro) and the place is stormed by Javert and a flood of cops. All the goons are still spooked by the maniac who just burned himself with a hot poker, so they just run around in circles until they're arrested. Jean, on the other hand, doesn't have time for a third incarceration so he does what he has to do.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111595\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/jump-out-window-break-glass.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"222\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That evening, at the prison, Javert visits Mr. Colman and demands to know everything. Thank goodness this episode is over because all this stress is driving me to drink!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111596\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/stressed-out-margarita-bad-girls-club.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: Pretty Much Everyone. \u003c/strong>I don't feel like I even need to explain this one.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: Old Gossip. \u003c/strong>This random guy held onto some very hot goss for over a decade and then unleashed it at exactly the right time. He's messy. He's random. And I love him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>BRONZE: Cosette.\u003c/strong> Deciding not to die an old virgin was a solid choice. Congrats.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>SILVER: That Nun's Hat. \u003c/strong>Nope, I'm still not over it. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cstrong>GOLD: Jean Valjean\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">. \u003c/span>\u003c/strong>\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">He's a great guardian and a lovable gentle giant (when he's not burning off his own flesh), but this award is mostly for his ability to find such an Instagrammable apartment. Double tap!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/game-of-thrones\">\u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>Previous Recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111351/les-miserables-bbc-pbs-episode-3-recap-i-will-follow-him\">'Les Miserables' Episode 3 Recap: I Will Follow Him\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111154/les-miserables-episode-2-pbs-bbc-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi\">'Les Miserables' Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-Vous Coucher Avec Moi?\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"disqusTitle": "Netflix's 'Tuca & Bertie' Puts The Lady Birds In Charge",
"title": "Netflix's 'Tuca & Bertie' Puts The Lady Birds In Charge",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>\u003cem>Tuca & Bertie\u003c/em> is the latest adult animation to hit Netflix, and it centers on a brassy, colorful toucan (voiced by \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2017/12/14/569890709/tiffany-haddish-i-know-what-im-supposed-to-do-here-on-this-earth\">Tiffany Haddish\u003c/a>) and her neurotic best friend, a songbird (voiced by \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2016/08/02/484163577/marriage-and-motherhood-are-a-source-of-power-says-comic-ali-wong\">Ali Wong\u003c/a>). But the strongest voice on the show is behind the scenes—that of creator and executive producer Lisa Hanawalt.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Hanawalt, who \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2015/03/24/393853692/for-bojack-horseman-it-matters-if-a-cartoon-dog-is-a-man-or-a-woman\">helped shape the hit animation\u003c/a> \u003cem>BoJack Horseman\u003c/em> as its creative director, describes herself as someone vacillating between confident and anxious. So when her own show got a green light, she deliberately focused on a female perspective, and gave both sides of her personality a character.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Her brassy, bold self is woven into Tuca. \"Confident, yet relatable,\" Tuca describes herself in the premiere. \"Wearer of short shorts.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Her more uncertain, anxious side got life as Bertie. The birds are best friends in their 30s—a theme Hanawalt felt needed more exploration.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZybYIJtbcu0\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"So they're getting older, and Bertie maybe wants to buy a house and start a family and get married, and Tuca feels a little left behind,\" Hanawalt says. \"I wanted to explore what happens to a friendship like that—when you've been best friends for 10 years, but things are changing and you're maybe moving in different directions.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That this is an animated show allows Hanawalt and her team to embrace her unique sensibility. It involves absurdist humor and ... boobs. Lots of boobs.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In this show, boobs are on animals, on buildings; one boob even gets personified, popping right out of Bertie's chest in protest of a sexual advance. \"I am finished. I'm finished!\" the talking boob says. \"I am done with today! I need a drink.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"You can just slap boobs on anything,\" Hanawalt says. \"Boobs on a snake! That doesn't really make sense, but it doesn't need to. There's a surreality to the world.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This surreal world starring women of color and created by a woman showrunner marks a first. The existing adult animations out there — \u003cem>Family Guy\u003c/em>, \u003cem>Archer\u003c/em>, \u003cem>The Simpsons\u003c/em>—are driven by men behind the scenes and male protagonists on the screens. So \u003cem>Tuca & Bertie\u003c/em> breaks ground, as a comedy about finding your way in a male-dominated world—but also as proof that Hanawalt has found her way in a \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2019/04/17/709644139/pixars-sparkshorts-set-out-to-ignite-more-diversity-in-animation\">heavily male animation industry\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"I've had it pointed out to me when I'm the only woman in a room,\" Hanawalt says. \"Some people think that that's a relevant thing to just say out loud, and I'm like, 'Really! That's a comfortable way to start a meeting. Thank you for pointing out how different I am.'\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"There's a lot of people working in this industry who are just blissfully unaware of certain things and how they could be coded, or how they could come across to different types of people. So, yeah, I think it matters a lot who's in the room, and who's empowered to speak up about things.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When she became the boss, she was deliberate in her hiring.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"If you make that a goal of yours, it is not difficult to find writers of all colors and shapes and genders,\" Hanawalt says. \"It's really not difficult.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_111530\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-111530\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-800x533.jpg\" alt=\"Lisa Hanawalt is the creator and executive producer of 'Tuca & Bertie.'\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-1200x800.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-1920x1280.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Lisa Hanawalt is the creator and executive producer of 'Tuca & Bertie.' \u003ccite>(Eddy Chen/Netflix)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Amy Winfrey, who directs several \u003cem>Tuca \u003c/em>episodes, says she feels the benefits of a diverse room in how the show is made—the creators being \"open to suggestions from everybody just in trying to get the best show possible\"—and editor Molly Yahr says it shows up in the finished product.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"There is just a genuine importance for shows just displaying different parts of culture, and this show is a good indication of a type of female culture,\" Yahr says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For Hanawalt, showing that women are weird and gross and multifaceted, just as she is, helps normalize our weirdnesses and idiosyncrasies.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"I just hope that the people who watch it connect with it, and that it makes them feel better about who they are, so they don't have to feel apologetic for being a certain way or not being the status quo or whatever,\" Hanawalt says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To create that connection, Hanawalt is at the center of all the decisions on this show, from the overarching vision down to the sly jokes. On one afternoon, she and Yahr compare different voice takes of Wong and Haddish excitedly reacting to a Girl Thingz store (it's reminiscent of the accessory-store mall stalwart, Claire's).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"Girl things\" is a cheeky reference on \u003cem>Tuca & Bertie\u003c/em>. It's also the show's big idea.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Ted Robbins edited this story for broadcast.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org\">NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=Netflix%27s+%27Tuca+%26+Bertie%27+Puts+The+Lady+Birds+In+Charge&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cem>Tuca & Bertie\u003c/em> is the latest adult animation to hit Netflix, and it centers on a brassy, colorful toucan (voiced by \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2017/12/14/569890709/tiffany-haddish-i-know-what-im-supposed-to-do-here-on-this-earth\">Tiffany Haddish\u003c/a>) and her neurotic best friend, a songbird (voiced by \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2016/08/02/484163577/marriage-and-motherhood-are-a-source-of-power-says-comic-ali-wong\">Ali Wong\u003c/a>). But the strongest voice on the show is behind the scenes—that of creator and executive producer Lisa Hanawalt.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Hanawalt, who \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2015/03/24/393853692/for-bojack-horseman-it-matters-if-a-cartoon-dog-is-a-man-or-a-woman\">helped shape the hit animation\u003c/a> \u003cem>BoJack Horseman\u003c/em> as its creative director, describes herself as someone vacillating between confident and anxious. So when her own show got a green light, she deliberately focused on a female perspective, and gave both sides of her personality a character.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Her brassy, bold self is woven into Tuca. \"Confident, yet relatable,\" Tuca describes herself in the premiere. \"Wearer of short shorts.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Her more uncertain, anxious side got life as Bertie. The birds are best friends in their 30s—a theme Hanawalt felt needed more exploration.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/ZybYIJtbcu0'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/ZybYIJtbcu0'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"So they're getting older, and Bertie maybe wants to buy a house and start a family and get married, and Tuca feels a little left behind,\" Hanawalt says. \"I wanted to explore what happens to a friendship like that—when you've been best friends for 10 years, but things are changing and you're maybe moving in different directions.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That this is an animated show allows Hanawalt and her team to embrace her unique sensibility. It involves absurdist humor and ... boobs. Lots of boobs.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In this show, boobs are on animals, on buildings; one boob even gets personified, popping right out of Bertie's chest in protest of a sexual advance. \"I am finished. I'm finished!\" the talking boob says. \"I am done with today! I need a drink.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"You can just slap boobs on anything,\" Hanawalt says. \"Boobs on a snake! That doesn't really make sense, but it doesn't need to. There's a surreality to the world.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>This surreal world starring women of color and created by a woman showrunner marks a first. The existing adult animations out there — \u003cem>Family Guy\u003c/em>, \u003cem>Archer\u003c/em>, \u003cem>The Simpsons\u003c/em>—are driven by men behind the scenes and male protagonists on the screens. So \u003cem>Tuca & Bertie\u003c/em> breaks ground, as a comedy about finding your way in a male-dominated world—but also as proof that Hanawalt has found her way in a \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2019/04/17/709644139/pixars-sparkshorts-set-out-to-ignite-more-diversity-in-animation\">heavily male animation industry\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"I've had it pointed out to me when I'm the only woman in a room,\" Hanawalt says. \"Some people think that that's a relevant thing to just say out loud, and I'm like, 'Really! That's a comfortable way to start a meeting. Thank you for pointing out how different I am.'\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"There's a lot of people working in this industry who are just blissfully unaware of certain things and how they could be coded, or how they could come across to different types of people. So, yeah, I think it matters a lot who's in the room, and who's empowered to speak up about things.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When she became the boss, she was deliberate in her hiring.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"If you make that a goal of yours, it is not difficult to find writers of all colors and shapes and genders,\" Hanawalt says. \"It's really not difficult.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_111530\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg class=\"size-medium wp-image-111530\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-800x533.jpg\" alt=\"Lisa Hanawalt is the creator and executive producer of 'Tuca & Bertie.'\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-800x533.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-160x107.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-768x512.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-1020x680.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-1200x800.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60-1920x1280.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/05/tab_bts_01069_r_slide-c88ac0f0bc912d38f74699c4fa6f4466b3489d60.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Lisa Hanawalt is the creator and executive producer of 'Tuca & Bertie.' \u003ccite>(Eddy Chen/Netflix)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Amy Winfrey, who directs several \u003cem>Tuca \u003c/em>episodes, says she feels the benefits of a diverse room in how the show is made—the creators being \"open to suggestions from everybody just in trying to get the best show possible\"—and editor Molly Yahr says it shows up in the finished product.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"There is just a genuine importance for shows just displaying different parts of culture, and this show is a good indication of a type of female culture,\" Yahr says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For Hanawalt, showing that women are weird and gross and multifaceted, just as she is, helps normalize our weirdnesses and idiosyncrasies.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"I just hope that the people who watch it connect with it, and that it makes them feel better about who they are, so they don't have to feel apologetic for being a certain way or not being the status quo or whatever,\" Hanawalt says.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To create that connection, Hanawalt is at the center of all the decisions on this show, from the overarching vision down to the sly jokes. On one afternoon, she and Yahr compare different voice takes of Wong and Haddish excitedly reacting to a Girl Thingz store (it's reminiscent of the accessory-store mall stalwart, Claire's).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"Girl things\" is a cheeky reference on \u003cem>Tuca & Bertie\u003c/em>. It's also the show's big idea.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Ted Robbins edited this story for broadcast.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org\">NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=Netflix%27s+%27Tuca+%26+Bertie%27+Puts+The+Lady+Birds+In+Charge&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cp>The second season of \u003cem>The Handmaid's Tale\u003c/em> wasn't easy to watch. I mean, neither was the first, but the second one took all that agonizing misery we'd gotten used to and somehow threw it into overdrive. There was the near-mass-execution of handmaids, set to Kate Bush's \"This Woman's Work\" (\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M-RtqAPYLD8\">probably the most harrowing three minutes in TV history\u003c/a>). There were the falling fingernails of the colonies and the book of the dead up in Canada. There was that torturous moment when June/Offred found a car to escape, but couldn't ram it out of the garage in time. You remember, right? Of course you do. Because it was scarring as hell.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Well, breathe a (cautious) sigh of relief because the trailer for Season 3 is here and the handmaids are finally in full rebellion. Want sneaky escapes under the cover of darkness and surreptitious exchanges in the supermarket? You got it! Want sexy hand-touching between June and Nick? It's on! Want Aunt Lydia too weak to cattle prod anyone? Somebody high-five me! Most excitingly of all... is this a full-blown alliance with Mrs Waterford we see? Under his eye, no more!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The third season of \u003cem>The Handmaid's Tale\u003c/em> hits Hulu in June. In the meantime, you can see a hint of the revolution to come right here:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcTvQx1Wot0\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>The second season of \u003cem>The Handmaid's Tale\u003c/em> wasn't easy to watch. I mean, neither was the first, but the second one took all that agonizing misery we'd gotten used to and somehow threw it into overdrive. There was the near-mass-execution of handmaids, set to Kate Bush's \"This Woman's Work\" (\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M-RtqAPYLD8\">probably the most harrowing three minutes in TV history\u003c/a>). There were the falling fingernails of the colonies and the book of the dead up in Canada. There was that torturous moment when June/Offred found a car to escape, but couldn't ram it out of the garage in time. You remember, right? Of course you do. Because it was scarring as hell.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Well, breathe a (cautious) sigh of relief because the trailer for Season 3 is here and the handmaids are finally in full rebellion. Want sneaky escapes under the cover of darkness and surreptitious exchanges in the supermarket? You got it! Want sexy hand-touching between June and Nick? It's on! Want Aunt Lydia too weak to cattle prod anyone? Somebody high-five me! Most excitingly of all... is this a full-blown alliance with Mrs Waterford we see? Under his eye, no more!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The third season of \u003cem>The Handmaid's Tale\u003c/em> hits Hulu in June. In the meantime, you can see a hint of the revolution to come right here:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/RcTvQx1Wot0'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/RcTvQx1Wot0'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cp>When Netflix's \u003cem>13 Reasons Why\u003c/em> was released two years ago, depicting the life of a teenager who decided to take her own life, educators and psychologists \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/sections/ed/2017/05/05/526871398/facts-about-teens-suicide-and-13-reasons-why\">warned \u003c/a>the program could lead to copycat suicides. Now, a study funded by the National Institutes of Health shows that those concerns may have been warranted.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The series is filmed in and around Sonoma County, including Analy High School in Sebastopol, which stands in for the show's Liberty High School. Other filming locations have included the Epicenter Sports and Entertainment Center in northwest Santa Rosa, Friedman's Home Improvement in Petaluma, the downtown mall Santa Rosa Plaza in Santa Rosa, and various storefronts and residences in San Rafael and Vallejo. Many teenagers from Sonoma County have worked as extras on the show.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postID='news_11741825' *ways-to-help-suicide_wide-82dd5198f71dc6f92a4adf84928322ed1a7b4ed0-1020x574.jpg'* target='_blank']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the month following the show's debut in March 2017, there was a 28.9% increase in suicide among Americans ages 10-17, said the \u003ca href=\"https://www.jaacap.org/article/S0890-8567(19)30288-6/fulltext\">study\u003c/a>, published Monday in the \u003cem>Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry\u003c/em>. The number of suicides was greater than that seen in any single month over the five-year period researchers examined. Over the rest of the year, there were 195 more youth suicides than expected given historical trends.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Researchers warn that their study could not prove causation. Some unknown third factor might have been responsible for the increase, they said. Still, citing the strong correlation, they cautioned against exposing children and adolescents to the series.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"The results of this study should raise awareness that young people are particularly vulnerable to the media,\" study co-author Lisa Horowitz, a staff scientist at the National Institute of Mental Health, said in a statement. \"All disciplines, including the media, need to take good care to be constructive and thoughtful about topics that intersect with public health crises.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Lead author Jeff Bridge, a suicide researcher at Nationwide Children's Hospital in Columbus, told The Associated Press that an additional analysis found the April suicide rate was higher than in the previous 19 years. \"The creators of the series intentionally portrayed the suicide of the main character. It was a very graphic depiction of the suicide death,\" he said, which can lead to suicidal behavior.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postID='pop_104126' *bourdain-spade-1180x692.jpg'* target='_blank']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The study found that boys were far more likely than girls to kill themselves after the show debuted. Suicide rates for females did increase, but it was not statistically significant. Nor were there any \"significant trends\" in suicide rates for people 18-64, researchers said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a statement, a Netflix spokesperson said they had \"just seen this study and are looking into the research. \"This is a critically important topic and we have worked hard to ensure that we handle this sensitive issue responsibly,\" Netflix said, according to The Associated Press.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The spokesperson noted that the study conflicts with research published last week out of the University of Pennsylvania. \u003ca href=\"https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0277953619302072?via%3Dihub)\">That study \u003c/a>found that young adults, ages 18-29, who watched the entire second season of the show \"reported declines in suicide ideation and self-harm relative to those who did not watch the show at all.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>However, that study found, viewers who stopped watching the second season before the end \"exhibited greater suicide risk and less optimism about the future than those who continued to the end.\" The results \"suggest that a fictional story with a focus on suicidal content can have both harmful and helpful effects,\" the authors wrote.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When the show debuted, the National Association of School Psychologists issued a \u003ca href=\"https://www.nasponline.org/resources-and-publications/resources/school-safety-and-crisis/preventing-youth-suicide/13-reasons-why-netflix-series/13-reasons-why-netflix-series-considerations-for-educators\">warning statement\u003c/a>: \"We do not recommend that vulnerable youth, especially those who have any degree of suicidal ideation, watch this series. Its powerful storytelling may lead impressionable viewers to romanticize the choices made by the characters and/or develop revenge fantasies,\" they said. \"Suicide is not a solution to problems.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After the criticism, Netflix added a \"viewer warning card\" before the first episode. Netflix also added language publicizing the website \u003ca href=\"https://13reasonswhy.info/\">13reasonswhy.info\u003c/a>, which offers resources for people contemplating suicide. Season 3 of the show is expected to be released this year.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>If you or someone you know may be considering suicide, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 (En Español: 1-888-628-9454; Deaf and Hard of Hearing: 1-800-799-4889) or the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org.\">NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=Teen+Suicide+Spiked+After+Debut+Of+Netflix%27s+%2713+Reasons+Why%2C%27+Study+Says&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the month following the show's debut in March 2017, there was a 28.9% increase in suicide among Americans ages 10-17, said the \u003ca href=\"https://www.jaacap.org/article/S0890-8567(19)30288-6/fulltext\">study\u003c/a>, published Monday in the \u003cem>Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry\u003c/em>. The number of suicides was greater than that seen in any single month over the five-year period researchers examined. Over the rest of the year, there were 195 more youth suicides than expected given historical trends.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Researchers warn that their study could not prove causation. Some unknown third factor might have been responsible for the increase, they said. Still, citing the strong correlation, they cautioned against exposing children and adolescents to the series.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"The results of this study should raise awareness that young people are particularly vulnerable to the media,\" study co-author Lisa Horowitz, a staff scientist at the National Institute of Mental Health, said in a statement. \"All disciplines, including the media, need to take good care to be constructive and thoughtful about topics that intersect with public health crises.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Lead author Jeff Bridge, a suicide researcher at Nationwide Children's Hospital in Columbus, told The Associated Press that an additional analysis found the April suicide rate was higher than in the previous 19 years. \"The creators of the series intentionally portrayed the suicide of the main character. It was a very graphic depiction of the suicide death,\" he said, which can lead to suicidal behavior.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The study found that boys were far more likely than girls to kill themselves after the show debuted. Suicide rates for females did increase, but it was not statistically significant. Nor were there any \"significant trends\" in suicide rates for people 18-64, researchers said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a statement, a Netflix spokesperson said they had \"just seen this study and are looking into the research. \"This is a critically important topic and we have worked hard to ensure that we handle this sensitive issue responsibly,\" Netflix said, according to The Associated Press.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The spokesperson noted that the study conflicts with research published last week out of the University of Pennsylvania. \u003ca href=\"https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0277953619302072?via%3Dihub)\">That study \u003c/a>found that young adults, ages 18-29, who watched the entire second season of the show \"reported declines in suicide ideation and self-harm relative to those who did not watch the show at all.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>However, that study found, viewers who stopped watching the second season before the end \"exhibited greater suicide risk and less optimism about the future than those who continued to the end.\" The results \"suggest that a fictional story with a focus on suicidal content can have both harmful and helpful effects,\" the authors wrote.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When the show debuted, the National Association of School Psychologists issued a \u003ca href=\"https://www.nasponline.org/resources-and-publications/resources/school-safety-and-crisis/preventing-youth-suicide/13-reasons-why-netflix-series/13-reasons-why-netflix-series-considerations-for-educators\">warning statement\u003c/a>: \"We do not recommend that vulnerable youth, especially those who have any degree of suicidal ideation, watch this series. Its powerful storytelling may lead impressionable viewers to romanticize the choices made by the characters and/or develop revenge fantasies,\" they said. \"Suicide is not a solution to problems.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After the criticism, Netflix added a \"viewer warning card\" before the first episode. Netflix also added language publicizing the website \u003ca href=\"https://13reasonswhy.info/\">13reasonswhy.info\u003c/a>, which offers resources for people contemplating suicide. Season 3 of the show is expected to be released this year.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>If you or someone you know may be considering suicide, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 (En Español: 1-888-628-9454; Deaf and Hard of Hearing: 1-800-799-4889) or the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org.\">NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=Teen+Suicide+Spiked+After+Debut+Of+Netflix%27s+%2713+Reasons+Why%2C%27+Study+Says&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cp>NEW YORK (AP) — Barack and Michelle Obama on Tuesday unveiled a slate of projects they are preparing for Netflix, a year after the former president and first lady signed a deal with the streaming platform.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The Obamas’ production company, \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2018/05/22/613246456/obamas-sign-content-deal-with-netlfix-form-higher-ground-productions\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Higher Ground Productions\u003c/a>, on Tuesday \u003ca href=\"https://media.netflix.com/en/press-releases/higher-ground-announces-upcoming-slate-of-projects-exclusive-to-netflix\">announced a total of seven films\u003c/a> and series that Barack Obama said will entertain but also “educate, connect and inspire us all.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[aside postID='arts_13851806' hero='https://ww2.kqed.org/arts/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2019/02/Obama.MAIN_-1920x1080.jpg' target='_blank']\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Higher Ground is producing a feature film on Frederick Douglass, adapted from David W. Blight’s Pulitzer Prize-winning biography. Also in the works is a documentary series that adapts \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/forum/2010101869265/michael-lewis-on-the-government-shutdown-and-his-latest-book-the-fifth-risk\">Michael Lewis\u003c/a>’ \u003cem>Fifth Risk: Undoing Democracy\u003c/em>, the \u003cem>Moneyball\u003c/em> author’s 2018 best-seller about government servants working under the political appointees of Donald Trump’s administration.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The production company’s first release will be Steven Bognar and Julia Reichert’s Sundance Film Festival documentary \u003cem>American Factory\u003c/em>, about a Chinese-owned factory in post-industrial Ohio. Netflix and Higher Ground also acquired Jim LeBrecht and Nicole Newnham’s \u003cem>Crip Camp\u003c/em>, a documentary about a summer camp for disabled teenagers founded in upstate New York in the early 1970s.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The Obamas are also developing an upstairs-downstairs drama set in post-WWII New York titled \u003cem>Bloom\u003c/em>, and an adaptation of \u003cem>The New York Times\u003c/em> “Overlooked” obituary column, about deaths unreported by the paper. A half-hour show for preschoolers titled \u003cem>Listen to Your Vegetables & Eat Your Parents\u003c/em> will instruct kids about food.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We love this slate because it spans so many different interests and experiences, yet it’s all woven together with stories that are relevant to our daily lives,” Michelle Obama said. “We think there’s something here for everyone—moms and dads, curious kids, and anyone simply looking for an engaging, uplifting watch at the end of a busy day.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Here's a full list of the first slate of projects they're working on:\u003c/p>\n\u003col>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>American Factor\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>Bloom\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>Frederick Douglass biopic\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2018/obituaries/overlooked-ida-b-wells.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Overlooked\u003c/a>\u003c/em> series\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>Listen to Your Vegetables and Eat Your Parents\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2018/10/02/652563904/the-fifth-risk-paints-a-portrait-of-a-government-led-by-the-uninterested\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Fifth Risk\u003c/a>\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>Crip Camp\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ol>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The projects are to be released over the next several years.\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The Obamas are also developing an upstairs-downstairs drama set in post-WWII New York titled \u003cem>Bloom\u003c/em>, and an adaptation of \u003cem>The New York Times\u003c/em> “Overlooked” obituary column, about deaths unreported by the paper. A half-hour show for preschoolers titled \u003cem>Listen to Your Vegetables & Eat Your Parents\u003c/em> will instruct kids about food.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We love this slate because it spans so many different interests and experiences, yet it’s all woven together with stories that are relevant to our daily lives,” Michelle Obama said. “We think there’s something here for everyone—moms and dads, curious kids, and anyone simply looking for an engaging, uplifting watch at the end of a busy day.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Here's a full list of the first slate of projects they're working on:\u003c/p>\n\u003col>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>American Factor\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>Bloom\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>Frederick Douglass biopic\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2018/obituaries/overlooked-ida-b-wells.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Overlooked\u003c/a>\u003c/em> series\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>Listen to Your Vegetables and Eat Your Parents\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2018/10/02/652563904/the-fifth-risk-paints-a-portrait-of-a-government-led-by-the-uninterested\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Fifth Risk\u003c/a>\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003cli>\u003cem>Crip Camp\u003c/em>\u003c/li>\n\u003c/ol>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The projects are to be released over the next several years.\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"content": "\u003cp>In 2015, a woman named Dee Dee Blanchard was found stabbed to death in the Missouri home she shared with her teenage daughter, Gypsy Rose.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As the details surrounding the murder came out, it was revealed that Blanchard had falsely convinced Gypsy Rose and everyone they knew—including doctors—that Gypsy Rose was seriously ill and needed to use a wheelchair. After her death, Blanchard was posthumously diagnosed with \u003ca href=\"https://medlineplus.gov/ency/article/001555.htm\">Munchausen syndrome by proxy\u003c/a>, a mental health disorder in which a person makes up or causes illness in a person under their care.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Actor Patricia Arquette, who plays Blanchard in the new Hulu series \u003cem>The Act,\u003c/em> says it was \"very weird\" to get into the character's head: \"I had to kind of think of who Dee Dee was outside of all of those judgments people had after the fact.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Arquette sees Munchausen syndrome by proxy as a sign of \"toxic codependency,\" in which a parent feels the need to care for a child to an extreme degree.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"We all have natural instincts as parents. When something's wrong with our kid, we think we have an instinct of what it might be,\" Arquette says. \"I think Dee Dee has all these things in excess and in dangerous amounts.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Arquette has taken on a series of complex roles in the past few years. In 2019, she won a Golden Globe award for her portrayal of civilian prison worker Joyce \"Tilly\" Mitchell in the Showtime series \u003cem>Escape at Dannemora.\u003c/em> And in 2015 she won an Academy Award for her role as a single mother in Richard Linklater's film \u003cem>Boyhood\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_5fqDZCjQo\u003c/p>\n\u003chr>\n\u003ch3>Interview Highlights\u003c/h3>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>On learning about Munchausen syndrome by proxy to play Dee Dee Blanchard in \u003c/strong>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>The Act\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I think that it's really under-studied and a lot is not known about it at this point. Part of my research was looking at what doctors were saying about Munchausen by proxy. Oftentimes people, when they were children themselves, they were ill, and they got attention when they were ill. ... That's how they got some of their needs met. So that's part of it. Also, the parents sometimes are using it for their own personal need for attention, or to raise money, or a combination of those [things].\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>On her role as a civilian prison worker who enables a prison break in the Showtime series \u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>Escape at Dannemora, \u003c/em>\u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>which is based on a true story\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Conceptually, as a woman, I was really excited to explore this middle-aged woman being a sexual being, and being really comfortable with her body and being sexual—in her sexuality, being in her body completely, which is so different than me, because I've grown up in this Hollywood structure that's always telling you, \"You're not right no matter what the hell you look like. No matter how young and beautiful you are, you're not beautiful enough, and there's always something wrong with your body, and there's always something wrong with the way you look.\" So the idea to play a middle-aged woman who is unapologetic about her sexuality was very exciting to me.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>On growing up in a household in which multiple religions were practiced \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>My mom was Jewish, and my dad was Muslim, and I went to Catholic school, and I wanted to be a nun, and at one point my brother was Buddhist. My parents believed there was only one God, and that really we all had the right as people to decide spiritually what our own paths were. ... We were raised to really respect all religions and all peaceful people—people [that] love God and even people that don't love God. We were raised to have a lot of tolerance for religious differences.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>On her father's conversion to Islam \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At one point my dad said, \"You know what? I'm going to convert to Judaism.\" And [my mom] said, \"Oh that's great.\" And so he went to go convert, and he got lost, and he came home, and he said, \"Hey, I have something to tell you. I converted to Islam today.\" She said, \"Only you! You've got to be kidding me.\" ... He said, \"You know, I got lost, and I ended up at this mosque, and I went in to ask for directions, and I ended up talking to the imam. And then we got into a really deep conversation about religion and it really felt right. And so that's what I did.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>On walking away from a role early in her career, shortly after giving birth to her first child \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The premise [of the project] is that there is a camera in a closet, and this guy secretly tapes women he's with. ... I said [to the director], \"Well what do you want to see?\" Meanwhile, I'm breastfeeding, you know? So I was feeling pretty vulnerable. He was like, \"I don't know, I just want you to sign something saying you'll do whatever we want.\" I was like, \"I can't sign something saying I'll do whatever you want. What do you want to see? This camera's not moving around; it's in a closet. What exactly do you want to see?\" And he said he wouldn't work that way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And so, even though I was broke and I had a baby, I had to walk away from that job. I had to say, \"Well, I can't do your job, then, because I don't feel comfortable just signing something saying I'll do whatever you want with my naked body.\" It sucked that I was a poor mom with a little baby at home, and this director just didn't know what the hell he wanted. And couldn't be just a human being about it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>On learning that her sibling was transgender \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the time, I think it freaked me out ... the world that [Alexis] was going to be having to deal with—all the bigotry and the danger that she might encounter. We were incredibly close, and we had really deep conversations about it. [Alexis died in 2016.] And I was so grateful that Alexis taught me so much about opening my heart and understanding things that I didn't really understand from my own experience. We'd already lost a lot of our family by that point. And a part of me realized: I don't know what shape or body anyone comes in with, but I love you, and I trust you. I don't know what it feels like to be trans, but I trust you.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But there were a lot of feelings, and I think Alexis was tough enough to work it through with all of us, and let us have our feelings, and our questions, and our fears, and our concerns, and even things that were probably not the greatest. Alexis was really down for us having that whole process and conversation. ... It took a while for me. It was [my sister] Rosanna who was like, \"Oh, she's like a butterfly. It's just a transition, you know?\" And that was really beautiful.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c!-- iframe plugin v.4.3 wordpress.org/plugins/iframe/ -->\u003cbr>\n\u003ciframe src=\"https://www.npr.org/player/embed/718216601/718340258\" width=\"100%\" height=\"290\" frameborder=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"iframe-class\">\u003c/iframe>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Lauren Krenzel and Seth Kelley produced and edited this interview for broadcast. Bridget Bentz, Seth Kelley and Beth Novey adapted it for the Web.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2019 Fresh Air. To see more, visit \u003ca href=\"http://www.npr.org/programs/fresh-air/\">Fresh Air\u003c/a>.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=Patricia+Arquette+Explores+The+%27Toxic+Codependency%27+Of+Munchausen+By+Proxy&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Arquette has taken on a series of complex roles in the past few years. In 2019, she won a Golden Globe award for her portrayal of civilian prison worker Joyce \"Tilly\" Mitchell in the Showtime series \u003cem>Escape at Dannemora.\u003c/em> And in 2015 she won an Academy Award for her role as a single mother in Richard Linklater's film \u003cem>Boyhood\u003c/em>.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/Y_5fqDZCjQo'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/Y_5fqDZCjQo'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003chr>\n\u003ch3>Interview Highlights\u003c/h3>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>On learning about Munchausen syndrome by proxy to play Dee Dee Blanchard in \u003c/strong>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>The Act\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I think that it's really under-studied and a lot is not known about it at this point. 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Also, the parents sometimes are using it for their own personal need for attention, or to raise money, or a combination of those [things].\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>On her role as a civilian prison worker who enables a prison break in the Showtime series \u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>\u003cem>Escape at Dannemora, \u003c/em>\u003c/strong>\u003cstrong>which is based on a true story\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Conceptually, as a woman, I was really excited to explore this middle-aged woman being a sexual being, and being really comfortable with her body and being sexual—in her sexuality, being in her body completely, which is so different than me, because I've grown up in this Hollywood structure that's always telling you, \"You're not right no matter what the hell you look like. No matter how young and beautiful you are, you're not beautiful enough, and there's always something wrong with your body, and there's always something wrong with the way you look.\" So the idea to play a middle-aged woman who is unapologetic about her sexuality was very exciting to me.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>On growing up in a household in which multiple religions were practiced \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>My mom was Jewish, and my dad was Muslim, and I went to Catholic school, and I wanted to be a nun, and at one point my brother was Buddhist. My parents believed there was only one God, and that really we all had the right as people to decide spiritually what our own paths were. ... We were raised to really respect all religions and all peaceful people—people [that] love God and even people that don't love God. 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And so that's what I did.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>On walking away from a role early in her career, shortly after giving birth to her first child \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The premise [of the project] is that there is a camera in a closet, and this guy secretly tapes women he's with. ... I said [to the director], \"Well what do you want to see?\" Meanwhile, I'm breastfeeding, you know? So I was feeling pretty vulnerable. He was like, \"I don't know, I just want you to sign something saying you'll do whatever we want.\" I was like, \"I can't sign something saying I'll do whatever you want. What do you want to see? This camera's not moving around; it's in a closet. What exactly do you want to see?\" And he said he wouldn't work that way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And so, even though I was broke and I had a baby, I had to walk away from that job. 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"title": "'Game Of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 3 Recap: Great Balls Of Fire",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, the Brienne-Jamie-Tormund love triangle heated up in a major way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/1120437719061225472\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But that trio's got nothing on the steaminess that went on between Arya and Gendry.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111179\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/arya-dtf.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109446\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/02/fans-self.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"271\" height=\"251\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany made this \"per my last email\" face, which could also be read as an \"If you weren't my boyfriend's sister, I would turn you into a Lunchable for my dragons\" face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111407\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-1020x572.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"359\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-1020x572.jpeg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-160x90.jpeg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-800x448.jpeg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-768x431.jpeg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q.jpeg 1024w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of said boyfriend, he finally told Dany that they're related, inspiring an official change to their Facebook relationship status.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111181\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"612\" height=\"320\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320.jpg 612w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320-160x84.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 612px) 100vw, 612px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, outside of Winterfell, the Night King prepared to annihilate all of our faves by jamming to some Drake.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/1122653091709349889\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Who will survive the Battle of Winterfell, which took 55 days to film, cost $15 million to produce and is the longest battle sequence in film and television history? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone stands at attention, waiting for things to go down. Winterfell has the same \u003cem>Welp-here-goes-nothing!\u003c/em> energy as the moment Thelma and Louise clasp hands and drive off a cliff.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111410\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/thelma-louise-hands-cliff.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Out of the darkness, a figure approaches. Is it the Night King walking up to say, \u003cem>Hey, y'all. Let's not, actually. Sorry about all the terrorism.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nope! It's Melisandre, the fire witch!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xqVMhN-Yit4\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I still have not forgiven her for toasting little Scarface Shireen!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">And neither has Sir Davos, who mean-mugs her so intensely, Melisandre says, \"There’s no need to execute me, Sir Davos. I’ll be dead before the dawn.\" Works for me!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The Battle of Winterfell begins and, from what I can see (which is not much *smashes brightness button on laptop*), things don't start off promisingly. Jorah and the Dothraki head out and everyone watches in horror as their flames are snuffed out as easily as middle schoolers squishing lightning bugs. Horses run back to Winterfell, all the way spooked. Jorah follows with a look that says, \u003cem>Yeah, we're f*cked. \u003c/em>Everyone poops in their pants just a little bit.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">A tsunami of zombies overwhelms our faves. Brienne screams for everyone to stand their ground, but soon she's just screaming in general. A group of zombies try to eat her face off, but Jamie swoops in with an assist. 15 minutes in and my eye is already twitching from the stress.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111281\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eye-twitch-mo-the-simpsons.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"284\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Up in the sky, Dany and Jon ride Drogon and Rhaegal and try to help, but there's a snow storm. The Al Roker of Westeros delivers this sobering forecast for the evening: 100% chance of blood-covered snow, 0% visibility, 1% chance of survival.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">On the wall, Arya and Sansa share a cute sister moment.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>You used to annoy the crap out of me, but you're pretty cool this season, so take this dagger and head down to the crypt. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \"I don’t know how to use it.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"Stick them with the pointy end.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">First of all, LOL.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Second of all, that's what Jon told Arya in their first combat lesson.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111436\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-1020x574.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-1200x675.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Oof, here come the tears.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">But there's no time for emotions right now! Sam is about to get his eye poked out! Thankfully, that Night Watch dude none of us know by name (it's apparently Eddison Tollett) saves him. His reward: a spear through the back of his skull. Pour one out for What's His Face, everyone!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111411\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Instead of avenging his savior and friend, Sam runs.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96472\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mary-kate-olsen-eye-roll-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"358\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Am I the only one screaming \"WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! OH, NO!!! OMG!\" to myself? Didn't think so.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">One of my \"WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! OH, NO!!! OMG!\" outbursts comes when Dany and Jon collide on their dragons because of the low visibility! I've said it in every other recap and I'll say it again. Dear \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> writers,\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, on the ground, things aren't going much better. Everyone decides to fall back. While Clegane is attempting to run back to safety, a zombie tries to take him out, but Arya's fiery arrow is too quick. I love the twisted relationship these two have built.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-20661\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey.gif 200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-32x32.gif 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-64x64.gif 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-96x96.gif 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-128x128.gif 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-75x75.gif 75w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 200px) 100vw, 200px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The new game plan: light the trenches to keep the dead at bay. The only problem is that the dragons are busy Crash Test Dummy-ing it up in the sky and fiery arrows are being extinguished by the snow and wind! Enter Melisandre, who takes her sweet ass time walking up to the trenches. C'mon, girl, put some pep in your step!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111437\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/must-go-faster.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"152\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Melisandre says, \"Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena\" over and over again, but nothing is happening! The zombies are just about to snack on her head when—KAPOW!—the trenches explode with fire. Phew! Thanks for saving literally everyone, Melisandre, but I still have my eye on you.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111438\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/lucille-arrested-look-eye.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"289\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Down in the crypt, Tyrion pretends to want to be up there getting his butt kicked instead of hanging with ladies and babies, drinking his weight in wine.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \"If I was out there right now...\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \"You’d die.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Another sick comeback! Arya kills with weapons. Sansa kills with words. Be safe, you wise-cracking legend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside by the creepy crying tree, Theon is all set to protect Bran.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Theon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, sorry about taking over Winterfell that one time and generally being a prick.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Bran:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>No worries! BRB!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Theon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Wait, what? This is not a great time for a nap!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Bran's eyes go white and his consciousness goes on a little field trip as a conspiracy of ravens. He immediately finds the Night King, who extends his bad manicure toward the army of the dead, instructing them to throw their bodies on the burning trenches until a bridge can form. (What a cozy show this is.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It doesn't take long for the zombies to breach the fire and start scaling Winterfell's walls. Why didn't the home team embed dragon glass shards into all the exterior walls? That would've saved us all a lot of grief, just saying.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a corner, Clegane stands frozen. Not a great moment to succumb to PTSD, my dude. Look alive (or else you literally won't be). Nearby, Sam cries, until someone saves him again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-42283\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/lc-eyeroll-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"375\" height=\"271\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the courtyard, we get a lingering shot of Lil Lyanna Mormont. I have a bad feeling about this....\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sure enough, a huge dead giant bursts through the gate and smacks her out of the way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-16987\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2015/07/luke-noooo.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"620\" height=\"331\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2015/07/luke-noooo.jpeg 620w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2015/07/luke-noooo-400x214.jpeg 400w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 620px) 100vw, 620px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Elsewhere, Arya crowd-surfs down a stairwell full of dead folk. What a rock star. But let's not celebrate too soon; she gets her head smacked against a stone wall.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111413\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/kermit-nervous.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"264\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Clegane is still PTSD-ing the battle away in a corner.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Eye Patch Dude:\u003c/strong> \"Clegane, we need you!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Clegane:\u003c/strong> \"F*ck off! We can’t beat them. Can’t you see that, you stupid whore?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48702\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/CherylLaugh.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then, Eye Patch Dude points to Arya, who's in the middle of falling off the roof, and says, \"Tell \u003cem>her\u003c/em> that.\" Clegane snaps out of it because Arya is the GOAT of \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em> and we can't have her dying halfway through this episode (...or ever).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Lil Lyanna survived the giant's smack! I think she speaks for all of us when she says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111414\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/lyanna-mormont-battle-of-winterfell.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Lil Lyanna runs up on the giant, who doesn't waste time snatching her up and crushing her skeleton, but not before she stabs him right in his blue contact lens!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-20668\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/3c66593df89a1e418a72dbca059c85fe.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"252\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">What a legend. All flags better be at half mast tomorrow.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In the sky, Viserion tries to ice blast his mom. Maybe he's mad about this whole new stepdad thing?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back inside Winterfell, Arya is trying to avoid hella zombies in the library from hell. She can't really see because of her concussion. It's a good thing she was blind that one season, huh? Arya throws a book as a diversion and tries to hustle out of there, only to run into a dead woman who is quickly made even more dead.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111415\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/arya-zombie-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If anyone survives this battle, there's going to be a whole lot of laundry and cleaning up to do. Getting it all done might take as long as it took Dany to let her dragons out of that dark dungeon a couple of years ago. (Yes, I still have a lot of feelings about that.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Unfortunately, Arya is still not in the clear. Zombies are all over her when Eye Patch Dude saves the day. Clegane snatches Arya up like an In-N-Out to-go order and hauls her out of there.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111416\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/to-go-arya-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They make it to a safe room, where Eye Patch Dude dies from his gazillion stab wounds.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111441\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-rbg.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Melisandre is randomly in the shadows and asks Arya, \"What do we say to the god of Death?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Arya quickly responds with: \"Not today!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106890\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/not-today-satan.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"281\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside, the Night King swoops down and makes Viserion ice blast Winterfell. Um, excuse me, we just dealt with our emotions about the Notre Dame. Can we please keep these historic structures sound?!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon clearly feels the same way because he shows up and things quickly turn into Dragon Mortal Kombat. There's scratching! There's pyromania! There's neck biting! Dany shows up and flings the Night King right off Viserion.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111417\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/night-king-got-bye.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon crash lands and, from the looks of it, Rhaegal is either really hurt or dead. WHAT DID I SAY, \u003cem>GAME OF THRONES\u003c/em> WRITERS?!?!?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Dany flies down and finds the Ice King just standing there like a weirdo. She lights his ass up! Party time!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106880\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/troll-dance-party.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"372\" height=\"254\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, hold up. He's still alive!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111418\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Oh-hai-night-king-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon tries to sneak up on him, but the Night King uses his bad manicure again to revive all the humans who've died tonight. And not just the ones outside the gates either. Little Lyanna wakes up with blue contacts! So does What's His Butt from the Night Watch! And presumably Eye Patch Dude too! In this moment, the message to Jon is clear:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111419\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/run-forrest-run.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, Sam's girlfriend is chilling in the crypt when a skeletal hand shoots out of one of the tombs! Good thing Sansa has that dagger, right? \u003cspan class=\"s1\">😫😫😫😫😫😫\u003c/span> Everyone runs around as the dead gobble up women and children. THIS SHOW, MY GOD!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside by the tree, Theon is lighting hoes up. Bran is still out of office.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111420\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/ron-harry-potter-confused.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"214\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Just when it looks like Jon is about to meet his end on the battlefield, Dany rolls up.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111421\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/GET-IN-LOSER-GOT.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Ack! A f*ckton of zombies jump all over Drogon and stab him all over his body! What an unforced error on Dany's part! I am livid!!!! This is what happens when you get the hots for your nephew! Drogon flies away without Dany and desperately tries shaking the zombies off. I can't watch!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98856\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/wendy-cant.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"148\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Now it's Dany's turn to almost die. Jorah saves her in the nick of time. She's still not gonna sleep with you, but thanks for looking out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back inside Winterfell, Sam needs saving again. I’m sorry to say this, but we should just let him die at this point, right? He doesn’t have the range.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Down in the crypt, the words of Antoine Dodson's viral clip echo against the wall: \"Hide yo' kids, hide yo' wife.\" Sansa and Tyrion are doing just that behind a tomb. Piano keys tinkle as Tyrion kisses Sansa’s hand, perhaps for the last time, as they take out their daggers. Sansa is like, \u003cem>Welp, let’s go re-kill some of my ancestors and see what happens. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, Theon is still doing his best to guard Bran, who is still catching some zzz's or whatever. Look alive, girl!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111422\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/come-on-now-wake-up-bad-girls-club.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"450\" height=\"286\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Time to check in with Sam again. Oh, he's STILL just sitting around and crying. How is he still alive??????? I think he should either try to help in some way or just let Lil Lyanna munch his face off.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In It's-about-time! news: Bran finally signs back onto AOL Instant Messenger.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111423\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/aol-dialup-connecting.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"302\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As the Night King and his homies approach, Bran looks at Theon and says, \"You're a good man. Thank you.\" Weak toast! This guy just slaughtered hundreds of zombies over many hours for you and that's all you got? For Theon, it seems to be enough though. He lets a tear fall before charging at the Night King and quickly getting murdered.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111424\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-beer.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In the courtyard, Viserion (or is it a dead Rhaegal or Drogon, who can tell?!) lets all those stepdaddy issues out by relentlessly blasting Jon with ice fire. Meanwhile, outside the gates, Jorah is getting shish-kebab-ed left and right, while Dany stands there thinking, \u003cem>Wow, this is really bad.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back at the tree, Bran gives the Night King a dose of what he does best: creepily holding eye contact for way too long. The Night King is thorougly weirded out and decides to put an end to this staring contest. He reaches for his weapon and then ARYA MOTHER F*CKING STARK LEAPS OUT OF NOWHERE. THE NIGHT KING CHOKES HER AND SHE LETS HER DAGGER FALL, ONLY TO STAB HIM FROM BELOW LIKE SHE PRACTICED WITH BRIENNE THAT ONE TIME. THE NIGHT KING BURSTS INTO A MILLION ICE PARTICLES, AS DO ALL OF HIS FRIENDS! AND YES, THE REST OF THIS RECAP WILL BE IN ALL CAPS BECAUSE YAAAAAAS!!!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-7660\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mrual4lQ0P1qz4rgp.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"195\" height=\"130\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107386\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/excited-arrested-development.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"275\" height=\"155\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107563\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/excited-kid.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"322\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96625\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yass-beyonce.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101826\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/excited.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-43532\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/sailor-moon-excited-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"391\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-55597\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/12/yass-party.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>WHO RUN THE WORLD? GIRLS, BUT SPECIFICALLY ARYA.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19942\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/giphy-2.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"230\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I CREATED A LITTLE VIDEO OF WHAT THE REACTION AROUND THE WORLD WAS TO ARYA SLAYING THE NIGHT KING:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty/status/1122712859421499393\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>OH, BTW, JORAH TOTALLY DIED. LATER, BRO! YOU SEEMED CHILL. AS DANY CRIES OVER HIS BODY, A DRAGON (THE LAST LIVING?) CUDDLES HER.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19941\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/1361.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"350\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">AS THE SUN COMES UP, MELISANDRE'S PROPHECY COMES TRUE AS SHE TAKES OFF HER YOUTH CRYSTAL, WALKS TOWARD THE HORIZON, TURNS INTO THAT OLD LADY FROM \u003cem>TITANIC\u003c/em> AND DIES. THANKS FOR NOT BEING TOTALLY AWFUL IN THE END.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111440\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-younger.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"385\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, I can't end this recap without paying homage to our fallen heroes. Click play on the abused puppy Sarah McLachlan song below and scroll down through the faces we will never see again (*chokes back sob*):\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SiylvmFI_8\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111429\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"358\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM.png 944w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM-800x447.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM-768x430.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111425\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jorah-got.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"701\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jorah-got.jpg 480w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jorah-got-160x234.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 480px) 100vw, 480px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111426\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-1020x1022.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"641\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-1020x1022.jpeg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-160x160.jpeg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-800x801.jpeg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-768x769.jpeg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-1198x1200.jpeg 1198w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre.jpeg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111427\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eddison-wall-got.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"316\" height=\"490\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eddison-wall-got.png 316w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eddison-wall-got-160x248.png 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 316px) 100vw, 316px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111428\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/beric-got.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"700\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/beric-got.jpg 500w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/beric-got-160x224.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111430\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/theon-grejoy.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"636\" height=\"720\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/theon-grejoy.jpg 636w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/theon-grejoy-160x181.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 636px) 100vw, 636px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">the previous episode of \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, the Brienne-Jamie-Tormund love triangle heated up in a major way.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>But that trio's got nothing on the steaminess that went on between Arya and Gendry.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111179\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/arya-dtf.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"266\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-109446\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/02/fans-self.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"271\" height=\"251\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Dany made this \"per my last email\" face, which could also be read as an \"If you weren't my boyfriend's sister, I would turn you into a Lunchable for my dragons\" face.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111407\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-1020x572.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"359\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-1020x572.jpeg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-160x90.jpeg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-800x448.jpeg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q-768x431.jpeg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/D4yXmf0X4AY3R9q.jpeg 1024w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of said boyfriend, he finally told Dany that they're related, inspiring an official change to their Facebook relationship status.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111181\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"612\" height=\"320\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320.jpg 612w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fb-official-612x320-160x84.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 612px) 100vw, 612px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, outside of Winterfell, the Night King prepared to annihilate all of our faves by jamming to some Drake.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>Who will survive the Battle of Winterfell, which took 55 days to film, cost $15 million to produce and is the longest battle sequence in film and television history? Only one way to find out! On with the show!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone stands at attention, waiting for things to go down. Winterfell has the same \u003cem>Welp-here-goes-nothing!\u003c/em> energy as the moment Thelma and Louise clasp hands and drive off a cliff.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111410\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/thelma-louise-hands-cliff.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Out of the darkness, a figure approaches. Is it the Night King walking up to say, \u003cem>Hey, y'all. Let's not, actually. Sorry about all the terrorism.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nope! It's Melisandre, the fire witch!\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/xqVMhN-Yit4'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/xqVMhN-Yit4'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>I still have not forgiven her for toasting little Scarface Shireen!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">And neither has Sir Davos, who mean-mugs her so intensely, Melisandre says, \"There’s no need to execute me, Sir Davos. I’ll be dead before the dawn.\" Works for me!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The Battle of Winterfell begins and, from what I can see (which is not much *smashes brightness button on laptop*), things don't start off promisingly. Jorah and the Dothraki head out and everyone watches in horror as their flames are snuffed out as easily as middle schoolers squishing lightning bugs. Horses run back to Winterfell, all the way spooked. Jorah follows with a look that says, \u003cem>Yeah, we're f*cked. \u003c/em>Everyone poops in their pants just a little bit.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">A tsunami of zombies overwhelms our faves. Brienne screams for everyone to stand their ground, but soon she's just screaming in general. A group of zombies try to eat her face off, but Jamie swoops in with an assist. 15 minutes in and my eye is already twitching from the stress.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111281\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eye-twitch-mo-the-simpsons.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"284\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Up in the sky, Dany and Jon ride Drogon and Rhaegal and try to help, but there's a snow storm. The Al Roker of Westeros delivers this sobering forecast for the evening: 100% chance of blood-covered snow, 0% visibility, 1% chance of survival.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">On the wall, Arya and Sansa share a cute sister moment.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>You used to annoy the crap out of me, but you're pretty cool this season, so take this dagger and head down to the crypt. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \"I don’t know how to use it.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Arya:\u003c/strong> \"Stick them with the pointy end.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">First of all, LOL.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Second of all, that's what Jon told Arya in their first combat lesson.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111436\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-1020x574.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-1020x574.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773-1200x675.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/IMG_5773.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Oof, here come the tears.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">But there's no time for emotions right now! Sam is about to get his eye poked out! Thankfully, that Night Watch dude none of us know by name (it's apparently Eddison Tollett) saves him. His reward: a spear through the back of his skull. Pour one out for What's His Face, everyone!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111411\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Instead of avenging his savior and friend, Sam runs.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96472\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/mary-kate-olsen-eye-roll-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"358\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Am I the only one screaming \"WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! OH, NO!!! OMG!\" to myself? Didn't think so.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">One of my \"WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! OH, NO!!! OMG!\" outbursts comes when Dany and Jon collide on their dragons because of the low visibility! I've said it in every other recap and I'll say it again. Dear \u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em> writers,\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, on the ground, things aren't going much better. Everyone decides to fall back. While Clegane is attempting to run back to safety, a zombie tries to take him out, but Arya's fiery arrow is too quick. I love the twisted relationship these two have built.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-20661\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey.gif 200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-32x32.gif 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-64x64.gif 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-96x96.gif 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-128x128.gif 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/200x200px-ZC-1e7a4ded_Crying-Mariah-Carey-75x75.gif 75w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 200px) 100vw, 200px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The new game plan: light the trenches to keep the dead at bay. The only problem is that the dragons are busy Crash Test Dummy-ing it up in the sky and fiery arrows are being extinguished by the snow and wind! Enter Melisandre, who takes her sweet ass time walking up to the trenches. C'mon, girl, put some pep in your step!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111437\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/must-go-faster.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"152\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Melisandre says, \"Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena\" over and over again, but nothing is happening! The zombies are just about to snack on her head when—KAPOW!—the trenches explode with fire. Phew! Thanks for saving literally everyone, Melisandre, but I still have my eye on you.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111438\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/lucille-arrested-look-eye.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"289\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Down in the crypt, Tyrion pretends to want to be up there getting his butt kicked instead of hanging with ladies and babies, drinking his weight in wine.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Tyrion:\u003c/strong> \"If I was out there right now...\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Sansa:\u003c/strong> \"You’d die.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Another sick comeback! Arya kills with weapons. Sansa kills with words. Be safe, you wise-cracking legend.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside by the creepy crying tree, Theon is all set to protect Bran.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Theon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Hey, sorry about taking over Winterfell that one time and generally being a prick.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Bran:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>No worries! BRB!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Theon:\u003c/strong> \u003cem>Wait, what? This is not a great time for a nap!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Bran's eyes go white and his consciousness goes on a little field trip as a conspiracy of ravens. He immediately finds the Night King, who extends his bad manicure toward the army of the dead, instructing them to throw their bodies on the burning trenches until a bridge can form. (What a cozy show this is.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It doesn't take long for the zombies to breach the fire and start scaling Winterfell's walls. Why didn't the home team embed dragon glass shards into all the exterior walls? That would've saved us all a lot of grief, just saying.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In a corner, Clegane stands frozen. Not a great moment to succumb to PTSD, my dude. Look alive (or else you literally won't be). Nearby, Sam cries, until someone saves him again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-42283\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/lc-eyeroll-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"375\" height=\"271\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the courtyard, we get a lingering shot of Lil Lyanna Mormont. I have a bad feeling about this....\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sure enough, a huge dead giant bursts through the gate and smacks her out of the way.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-16987\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2015/07/luke-noooo.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"620\" height=\"331\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2015/07/luke-noooo.jpeg 620w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2015/07/luke-noooo-400x214.jpeg 400w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 620px) 100vw, 620px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Elsewhere, Arya crowd-surfs down a stairwell full of dead folk. What a rock star. But let's not celebrate too soon; she gets her head smacked against a stone wall.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111413\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/kermit-nervous.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"264\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Clegane is still PTSD-ing the battle away in a corner.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Eye Patch Dude:\u003c/strong> \"Clegane, we need you!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">\u003cstrong>Clegane:\u003c/strong> \"F*ck off! We can’t beat them. Can’t you see that, you stupid whore?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-48702\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/CherylLaugh.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then, Eye Patch Dude points to Arya, who's in the middle of falling off the roof, and says, \"Tell \u003cem>her\u003c/em> that.\" Clegane snaps out of it because Arya is the GOAT of \u003cem>GoT\u003c/em> and we can't have her dying halfway through this episode (...or ever).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Lil Lyanna survived the giant's smack! I think she speaks for all of us when she says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111414\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/lyanna-mormont-battle-of-winterfell.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Lil Lyanna runs up on the giant, who doesn't waste time snatching her up and crushing her skeleton, but not before she stabs him right in his blue contact lens!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-20668\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/02/3c66593df89a1e418a72dbca059c85fe.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"252\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">What a legend. All flags better be at half mast tomorrow.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In the sky, Viserion tries to ice blast his mom. Maybe he's mad about this whole new stepdad thing?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back inside Winterfell, Arya is trying to avoid hella zombies in the library from hell. She can't really see because of her concussion. It's a good thing she was blind that one season, huh? Arya throws a book as a diversion and tries to hustle out of there, only to run into a dead woman who is quickly made even more dead.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111415\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/arya-zombie-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If anyone survives this battle, there's going to be a whole lot of laundry and cleaning up to do. Getting it all done might take as long as it took Dany to let her dragons out of that dark dungeon a couple of years ago. (Yes, I still have a lot of feelings about that.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Unfortunately, Arya is still not in the clear. Zombies are all over her when Eye Patch Dude saves the day. Clegane snatches Arya up like an In-N-Out to-go order and hauls her out of there.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111416\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/to-go-arya-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>They make it to a safe room, where Eye Patch Dude dies from his gazillion stab wounds.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111441\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-rbg.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Melisandre is randomly in the shadows and asks Arya, \"What do we say to the god of Death?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Arya quickly responds with: \"Not today!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106890\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/not-today-satan.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"281\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Outside, the Night King swoops down and makes Viserion ice blast Winterfell. Um, excuse me, we just dealt with our emotions about the Notre Dame. Can we please keep these historic structures sound?!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon clearly feels the same way because he shows up and things quickly turn into Dragon Mortal Kombat. There's scratching! There's pyromania! There's neck biting! Dany shows up and flings the Night King right off Viserion.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111417\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/night-king-got-bye.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon crash lands and, from the looks of it, Rhaegal is either really hurt or dead. WHAT DID I SAY, \u003cem>GAME OF THRONES\u003c/em> WRITERS?!?!?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111030\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/leave-drogon-alone-game-of-thrones.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"190\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Dany flies down and finds the Ice King just standing there like a weirdo. She lights his ass up! Party time!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106880\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/troll-dance-party.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"372\" height=\"254\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Oh, hold up. He's still alive!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111418\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Oh-hai-night-king-got.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Jon tries to sneak up on him, but the Night King uses his bad manicure again to revive all the humans who've died tonight. And not just the ones outside the gates either. Little Lyanna wakes up with blue contacts! So does What's His Butt from the Night Watch! And presumably Eye Patch Dude too! In this moment, the message to Jon is clear:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111419\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/run-forrest-run.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Meanwhile, Sam's girlfriend is chilling in the crypt when a skeletal hand shoots out of one of the tombs! Good thing Sansa has that dagger, right? \u003cspan class=\"s1\">😫😫😫😫😫😫\u003c/span> Everyone runs around as the dead gobble up women and children. THIS SHOW, MY GOD!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside by the tree, Theon is lighting hoes up. Bran is still out of office.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111420\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/ron-harry-potter-confused.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"214\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Just when it looks like Jon is about to meet his end on the battlefield, Dany rolls up.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111421\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/GET-IN-LOSER-GOT.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"243\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Ack! A f*ckton of zombies jump all over Drogon and stab him all over his body! What an unforced error on Dany's part! I am livid!!!! This is what happens when you get the hots for your nephew! Drogon flies away without Dany and desperately tries shaking the zombies off. I can't watch!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98856\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/wendy-cant.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"148\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Now it's Dany's turn to almost die. Jorah saves her in the nick of time. She's still not gonna sleep with you, but thanks for looking out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back inside Winterfell, Sam needs saving again. I’m sorry to say this, but we should just let him die at this point, right? He doesn’t have the range.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Down in the crypt, the words of Antoine Dodson's viral clip echo against the wall: \"Hide yo' kids, hide yo' wife.\" Sansa and Tyrion are doing just that behind a tomb. Piano keys tinkle as Tyrion kisses Sansa’s hand, perhaps for the last time, as they take out their daggers. Sansa is like, \u003cem>Welp, let’s go re-kill some of my ancestors and see what happens. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside, Theon is still doing his best to guard Bran, who is still catching some zzz's or whatever. Look alive, girl!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111422\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/come-on-now-wake-up-bad-girls-club.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"450\" height=\"286\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Time to check in with Sam again. Oh, he's STILL just sitting around and crying. How is he still alive??????? I think he should either try to help in some way or just let Lil Lyanna munch his face off.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In It's-about-time! news: Bran finally signs back onto AOL Instant Messenger.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111423\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/aol-dialup-connecting.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"302\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>As the Night King and his homies approach, Bran looks at Theon and says, \"You're a good man. Thank you.\" Weak toast! This guy just slaughtered hundreds of zombies over many hours for you and that's all you got? For Theon, it seems to be enough though. He lets a tear fall before charging at the Night King and quickly getting murdered.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111424\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-beer.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">In the courtyard, Viserion (or is it a dead Rhaegal or Drogon, who can tell?!) lets all those stepdaddy issues out by relentlessly blasting Jon with ice fire. Meanwhile, outside the gates, Jorah is getting shish-kebab-ed left and right, while Dany stands there thinking, \u003cem>Wow, this is really bad.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">Back at the tree, Bran gives the Night King a dose of what he does best: creepily holding eye contact for way too long. The Night King is thorougly weirded out and decides to put an end to this staring contest. He reaches for his weapon and then ARYA MOTHER F*CKING STARK LEAPS OUT OF NOWHERE. THE NIGHT KING CHOKES HER AND SHE LETS HER DAGGER FALL, ONLY TO STAB HIM FROM BELOW LIKE SHE PRACTICED WITH BRIENNE THAT ONE TIME. THE NIGHT KING BURSTS INTO A MILLION ICE PARTICLES, AS DO ALL OF HIS FRIENDS! AND YES, THE REST OF THIS RECAP WILL BE IN ALL CAPS BECAUSE YAAAAAAS!!!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-7660\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2013/08/tumblr_inline_mrual4lQ0P1qz4rgp.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"195\" height=\"130\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107386\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/excited-arrested-development.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"275\" height=\"155\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107563\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/excited-kid.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"322\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-96625\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/yass-beyonce.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"240\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101826\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/excited.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-43532\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/sailor-moon-excited-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"391\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-55597\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/12/yass-party.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>WHO RUN THE WORLD? GIRLS, BUT SPECIFICALLY ARYA.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19942\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/giphy-2.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"230\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I CREATED A LITTLE VIDEO OF WHAT THE REACTION AROUND THE WORLD WAS TO ARYA SLAYING THE NIGHT KING:\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>OH, BTW, JORAH TOTALLY DIED. LATER, BRO! YOU SEEMED CHILL. AS DANY CRIES OVER HIS BODY, A DRAGON (THE LAST LIVING?) CUDDLES HER.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-19941\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/01/1361.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"350\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"p1\">AS THE SUN COMES UP, MELISANDRE'S PROPHECY COMES TRUE AS SHE TAKES OFF HER YOUTH CRYSTAL, WALKS TOWARD THE HORIZON, TURNS INTO THAT OLD LADY FROM \u003cem>TITANIC\u003c/em> AND DIES. THANKS FOR NOT BEING TOTALLY AWFUL IN THE END.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111440\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pour-one-out-younger.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"385\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Okay, I can't end this recap without paying homage to our fallen heroes. Click play on the abused puppy Sarah McLachlan song below and scroll down through the faces we will never see again (*chokes back sob*):\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/1SiylvmFI_8'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/1SiylvmFI_8'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111429\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"358\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM.png 944w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM-160x89.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM-800x447.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-28-at-11.17.09-PM-768x430.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111425\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jorah-got.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"701\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jorah-got.jpg 480w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jorah-got-160x234.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 480px) 100vw, 480px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111426\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-1020x1022.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"641\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-1020x1022.jpeg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-160x160.jpeg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-800x801.jpeg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-768x769.jpeg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre-1198x1200.jpeg 1198w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/melisandre.jpeg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111427\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eddison-wall-got.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"316\" height=\"490\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eddison-wall-got.png 316w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eddison-wall-got-160x248.png 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 316px) 100vw, 316px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111428\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/beric-got.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"700\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/beric-got.jpg 500w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/beric-got-160x224.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\"> \u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111430\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/theon-grejoy.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"636\" height=\"720\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/theon-grejoy.jpg 636w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/theon-grejoy-160x181.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 636px) 100vw, 636px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Game Of Thrones\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/les-miserables\">\u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Previous recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111174/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-2-recap-lets-get-it-on\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Episode 2 Recap: Let's Get It On\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111008/game-of-thrones-season-8-episode-1-premiere-recap\">'Game of Thrones' Season 8 Premiere Recap: Reunited And It Feels So Good\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Les Miserables' Episode 3 Recap: I Will Follow Him",
"title": "'Les Miserables' Episode 3 Recap: I Will Follow Him",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111154/les-miserables-episode-2-pbs-bbc-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi\">the previous episode of \u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111154/les-miserables-episode-2-pbs-bbc-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi\">Les Miserables\u003c/a>, \u003c/i>Fantine effortlessly bounced back from her breakup with Felix and treated herself by getting a fun 1990s makeover!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-111286\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"521\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut.jpg 876w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut-160x209.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut-800x1043.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut-768x1001.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Juuuuust kidding. A scammer played by Olivia Colman took one look at Fantine and Cosette, saw money signs and decided to ruin their lives.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111280\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/olivia-colman-les-miserables-fantine-cosette-pbs.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"374\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But Olivia Colman couldn't destroy their lives by herself. She also had the help of this creepy-faced woman.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111171\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-weird-lady-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"224\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of creepy faces, Pontmercy Grandpa's mug was really something last episode. I can see why the \u003cem>RuPaul's Drag Race\u003c/em> casting director rejected him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111299\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"772\" height=\"466\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM.png 772w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM-160x97.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM-768x464.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 772px) 100vw, 772px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Beware of learning makeup skills from YouTube tutorials made by these two:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111304\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"550\" height=\"539\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup.jpg 550w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-160x157.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 550px) 100vw, 550px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111303\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1020x765.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"480\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1020x765.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-160x120.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-800x600.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-768x576.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1200x900.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1920x1440.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On the flip side, Jean Valjean underwent quite the glow-up, going from Red Hulk:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-110983\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1020x465.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"292\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1020x465.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-160x73.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-800x365.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-768x350.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1200x547.png 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM.png 1276w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To Hubba Hubba Hulk:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111321\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-1020x474.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"297\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-160x74.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-800x372.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-768x357.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Not only did his complexion greatly improve, but he also transformed into the Oprah of Montreuil, handing out jobs to anyone and everyone:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111294\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/you-get-a-oprah-car-job.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I could go on about the more terrible things that happened last episode (Fantine's visit to the hairdresser! Fantine's visit to the dentist! Fantine's visit to her death bed!), but I've already done that in \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111154/les-miserables-episode-2-pbs-bbc-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi\">the last recap\u003c/a>. Also, this gif I made pretty much sums it all up:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111339\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/me-watching-les-mis.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>What absurdly tragic things will occur this week? Let's find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We find Fantine where we left her, on her death bed, struggling to breathe. A nurse tells her that Jean Valjean has gone to fetch Cosette. She cracks a small smile, just like I might crack open an alcoholic drink to deal with another hour of French misery.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let's distract ourselves for a moment with a fun fact (brought to my attention by Maryanne, a reader of the last recap): The actress who plays Fantine is PHIL COLLINS' DAUGHTER!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98555\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/mind-blown-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"315\" height=\"210\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Someone else whose mind is being blown: Jean Fauxjean, the random man wrongly accused of being Prisoner #24601. Javert and three prisoners all give sworn testimonies that sound like this: \"Is that Jean Valjean? ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ but let's go with yes!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Right before Jean Fauxjean is sentenced in draconian fashion, the real Jean Valjean loses his cool.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111382\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/ENOUGH-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And reveals his true identity.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111383\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/real-slim-shady.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"334\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean calls out the three lying prisoners by mentioning factoids he knows about each of them. \u003cem>Hey, Prisoner #24602, you have a tramp stamp tattoo! And Prisoner #24603, your favorite Spice Girl is Sporty! And Prisoner #24604, you hate cilantro! \u003c/em>Everyone in the courthouse is shook.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Fauxjean's reaction:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111384\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/oprah-what-is-going-on-confused.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Inspector Javert's reaction:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-38941\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/giphy-11.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While being taken to prison in cuffs, Jean Valjean spots Ms. Creepy Face in the crowd and asks if she went to fetch Cosette as he asked. She didn't because she's a monster. I think I speak for all of us when I say:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111403\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pie-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"489\" height=\"270\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean doesn't have a pie handy so he smashes past the guards and chases her trifling, no good butt down!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111385\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/les-miserables-jean-valjean-running.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She's not worth the trouble, so he lets her go and rushes to Fantine's bedside. Jean and the nurse give Fantine a reason to live by saying Cosette is there and will come in once she gets better. Enter Javert who barks about how Fantine and Jean Valjean are \"the scum of the earth.\" Um, dude, the woman has no teeth and is gasping for her last breaths, maybe consider dialing down the evil just a smidge?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Javert hates that idea and dials the evil up to 15, revealing to Fantine that Jean Valjean never went to get Cosette. Having had quite enough of everyone being the absolute worst, Fantine cashes in her one-way ticket to heaven.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111386\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/and-now-im-dead.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"430\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because Javert is a sociopath, he responds with, \"She's dead and you're my prisoner!\" Someone, please throw a dead horse on this man! Jean Valjean's hands are cuffed, which makes throwing animal corpses very difficult, so he settles for screaming in his general direction.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111387\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jean-valjean-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the prison, they roughly chop off Jean Valjean's hair (they could have given him flattering layers but nooooo) and throw him in with Tramp Stamp, Sporty Spice Lover, Cilantro Hater and all the other prisoners. Jean Valjean tests one of the bars to see if it's loose. It isn't, but no worries; Jean managed to smuggle a chisel in his mouth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then, TWO YEARS PASS. So I'm guessing that chisel plan didn't work out? Fantine's ghost is like this right about now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-103627\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/05/judge-judy-watch-impatient-annoyed-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside of the Colman's inn, a busted-looking Cosette is doing hard labor when she spots a doll pop-up shop. It belongs to the creep who bought Fantine's hair and teeth. Cosette is captivated by one particular doll. Before she can realize, \u003cem>Hey, that's my mom's hair, you jerk!\u003c/em>, Olivia Colman shows up and beats Cosette for not working hard enough. Where's a cream pie when you need one?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back inside the inn, Olivia Colman chases Cosette around and whips her, while everyone cheers. Someone fetch me a time machine. I'm ready to help.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111389\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/want-me-to-kill-them.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, while fetching water at the creek, a shadowy figure appears behind Cosette. It's Jean Valjean! Sorry I doubted you, little mouth chisel!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean helps Cosette haul the buckets back to the inn and quickly learns that her caretakers belong in the ninth circle of Hell (the one reserved for treachery; I looked it up). He notices that the Colman's two daughters don't have to work and have fancy dolls, so Jean Valjean says, \u003cem>Hold my beer\u003c/em>, leaves for a few minutes and comes back with a doll for Cosette. It's the one made with Fantine's hair.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111390\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/burst-into-tears.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jean Valjean:\u003c/strong> \"I have a wish to see the child playing.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Olivia Colman:\u003c/strong> \"And who is going to serve you your supper?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jean Valjean:\u003c/strong> \"You, madam. Now bring me my supper, woman.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111391\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/get-her-jade-coco-montrese.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"322\" height=\"248\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, Mr. Colman shows Jean Valjean to his room and offers to prostitute Cosette out to him for a price. Sorry, I don't make the rules, but the Colmans officially have to die now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111388\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/you-have-to-kill-them-no-naomi.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Instead, Jean Valjean pays them a crazy amount of money to adopt Cosette. Not exactly what I had in mind, but this will do, I suppose. (Although, for real, they should die.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few minutes after Jean Valjean and Cosette leave, Mr. Colman catches up with them. He wants even more money and pulls a gun on them. OMG, DIE ALREADY! Time to hulk out, Jean. SMASH HIM!!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111393\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/hulk-punch-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean knocks the gun away and puts Mr. Colman in a choke-hold and scares him off. Again, not exactly what I had in mind, but I'll take whatever morsel of good I can get out of this show.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101635\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/yay1.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"381\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean and Cosette make their way to Paris. When they arrive, Cosette asks if she still has to be a child slave. Jean Valjean replies, \"No, you don't have to sweep or go to the wood to fetch water. You don't have to do anything, except eat and sleep and play.\" Cosette is like:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111394\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/kacey-musgraves-what.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"286\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We get a cozy montage of Cosette learning new things, being happy and showing off her new dad around town. Can the story just end here, before any more bad stuff can happen?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nope! A neighbor is already snooping around and asking too many questions.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111395\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/nosy-neighbor-lady.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"271\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cosette calls her a \"nosy old bitch.\" If any child has earned the right to sling curse words, it's for sure Cosette.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111396\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cussing-olsen-twin.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"390\" height=\"428\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cut to the police headquarters (ughhhhh, here we go again). Javert is back on his bullshit, \u003cdel>destroying lives for fun\u003c/del> implementing the law. After reading an incident report from the Colmans about how someone abducted Cosette, Javert looks into the claim and quickly realizes the Colmans are scammers. Great, so that means he'll leave Jean Valjean and Cosette in peace, right? Yeah, not so much. He commissions an artist to sketch a mugshot and pastes it all around Paris. It doesn't take long for the \"nosy old\" you-know-what to go tattling. 19TH-CENTURY FRANCE IS THE WORST!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-39750\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york-.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york-.gif 200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york--32x32.gif 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york--50x50.gif 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york--64x64.gif 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york--96x96.gif 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york--128x128.gif 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york--150x150.gif 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 200px) 100vw, 200px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cut to Javert and a bunch of cops chasing Jean Valjean and Cosette through the streets. Cornered, Jean manages to climb over the city wall and plop into a convent. The nuns are like, \u003cem>GTFO! The only man we tolerate is Jesus. \u003c/em>(I don't blame them.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Javert sniffs out where Jean and Cosette are hiding and bangs on the convent door, demanding to be let in. The head nun thinks about it and then says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-38850\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500.gif 245w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-32x32.gif 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-50x50.gif 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-64x64.gif 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-96x96.gif 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-128x128.gif 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-150x150.gif 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 245px) 100vw, 245px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Head Nun:\u003c/strong> \"No man has stepped foot in this convent for many years, nor will do.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>What a queen! We stan!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, Jean Valjean offers Head Nun a proposition: he'll scram, as long as she takes care of Cosette. Head Nun has a counter-offer: she'll take care of Cosette, hire Jean as a gardener and let him stay hidden on the grounds so he can continue kicking it with Cosette.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107564\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/celebrate.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, back at Jean and Cosette's former apartment, Javert is fuming. \"HE WILL NEVER GET AWAY! SEARCH EVERYWHERE! HE WILL BE FOUND!\" Dude seriously needs to...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111397\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/get-a-life-jerk-weed-pete-and-pete.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: The Colmans, Nosy Old You-Know-What, Ms. Creepy Face, Javert and Pretty Much Everyone Else. \u003c/strong>Karma is fashionably late, but she's coming for your necks!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: Fantine. \u003c/strong>I dreamed a dream that she would get to star in \u003cem>Kill Bill 3: Fantine's Revenge\u003c/em>, but things didn't really work out that way. We'll always have this Photoshop image though.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111341\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-1020x573.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-1020x573.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-1200x674.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill.jpg 1600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong> \u003cstrong>Cosette. \u003c/strong>But all is not lost! Now that Cosette is free, she's available to star in \u003cem>Kill Bill 3: Cosette's Revenge\u003c/em>! So many people to kill, so little time.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111398\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill-1020x573.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill-1020x573.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill-1200x674.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill.jpg 1600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>SILVER: Jean Valjean. \u003c/strong>His transformation into a certified DILF brings a tear to my eye and a tingle to my... you know what, nevermind.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cstrong>GOLD: Head Nun\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">. \u003c/span>\u003c/strong>\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">My heart already belongs to a lot of nuns from \u003cem>The Sound of Music\u003c/em> and \u003cem>Sister Act\u003c/em>, but I'm definitely making room for one more. Bless her heart (and her ability to shut down overly confident men)!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/game-of-thrones\">\u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>Previous Recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111154/les-miserables-episode-2-pbs-bbc-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi\">'Les Miserables' Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-Vous Coucher Avec Moi?\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/110513/les-miserables-pbs-bbc-episode-1-recap-un-break-my-heart\">'Les Miserables' Episode 1 Recap: Un-Break My Heart\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Need a laugh or two after this week's intense episode? This recap has your back!",
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"description": "Need a laugh or two after this week's intense episode? This recap has your back!",
"title": "'Les Miserables' Episode 3 Recap: I Will Follow Him | KQED",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111154/les-miserables-episode-2-pbs-bbc-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi\">the previous episode of \u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111154/les-miserables-episode-2-pbs-bbc-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi\">Les Miserables\u003c/a>, \u003c/i>Fantine effortlessly bounced back from her breakup with Felix and treated herself by getting a fun 1990s makeover!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-111286\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"521\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut.jpg 876w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut-160x209.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut-800x1043.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut-768x1001.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Juuuuust kidding. A scammer played by Olivia Colman took one look at Fantine and Cosette, saw money signs and decided to ruin their lives.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111280\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/olivia-colman-les-miserables-fantine-cosette-pbs.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"374\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But Olivia Colman couldn't destroy their lives by herself. She also had the help of this creepy-faced woman.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111171\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-weird-lady-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"224\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of creepy faces, Pontmercy Grandpa's mug was really something last episode. I can see why the \u003cem>RuPaul's Drag Race\u003c/em> casting director rejected him.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111299\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"772\" height=\"466\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM.png 772w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM-160x97.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM-768x464.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 772px) 100vw, 772px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Beware of learning makeup skills from YouTube tutorials made by these two:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111304\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"550\" height=\"539\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup.jpg 550w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-160x157.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 550px) 100vw, 550px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111303\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1020x765.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"480\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1020x765.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-160x120.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-800x600.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-768x576.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1200x900.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1920x1440.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On the flip side, Jean Valjean underwent quite the glow-up, going from Red Hulk:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-110983\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1020x465.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"292\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1020x465.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-160x73.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-800x365.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-768x350.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1200x547.png 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM.png 1276w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To Hubba Hubba Hulk:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111321\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-1020x474.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"297\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-160x74.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-800x372.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-768x357.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Not only did his complexion greatly improve, but he also transformed into the Oprah of Montreuil, handing out jobs to anyone and everyone:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111294\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/you-get-a-oprah-car-job.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>I could go on about the more terrible things that happened last episode (Fantine's visit to the hairdresser! Fantine's visit to the dentist! Fantine's visit to her death bed!), but I've already done that in \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111154/les-miserables-episode-2-pbs-bbc-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi\">the last recap\u003c/a>. Also, this gif I made pretty much sums it all up:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111339\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/me-watching-les-mis.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>What absurdly tragic things will occur this week? Let's find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We find Fantine where we left her, on her death bed, struggling to breathe. A nurse tells her that Jean Valjean has gone to fetch Cosette. She cracks a small smile, just like I might crack open an alcoholic drink to deal with another hour of French misery.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let's distract ourselves for a moment with a fun fact (brought to my attention by Maryanne, a reader of the last recap): The actress who plays Fantine is PHIL COLLINS' DAUGHTER!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-98555\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/01/mind-blown-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"315\" height=\"210\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Someone else whose mind is being blown: Jean Fauxjean, the random man wrongly accused of being Prisoner #24601. Javert and three prisoners all give sworn testimonies that sound like this: \"Is that Jean Valjean? ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ but let's go with yes!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Right before Jean Fauxjean is sentenced in draconian fashion, the real Jean Valjean loses his cool.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111382\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/ENOUGH-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And reveals his true identity.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111383\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/real-slim-shady.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"334\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean calls out the three lying prisoners by mentioning factoids he knows about each of them. \u003cem>Hey, Prisoner #24602, you have a tramp stamp tattoo! And Prisoner #24603, your favorite Spice Girl is Sporty! And Prisoner #24604, you hate cilantro! \u003c/em>Everyone in the courthouse is shook.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Fauxjean's reaction:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111384\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/oprah-what-is-going-on-confused.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Inspector Javert's reaction:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-38941\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/giphy-11.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While being taken to prison in cuffs, Jean Valjean spots Ms. Creepy Face in the crowd and asks if she went to fetch Cosette as he asked. She didn't because she's a monster. I think I speak for all of us when I say:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111403\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pie-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"489\" height=\"270\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean doesn't have a pie handy so he smashes past the guards and chases her trifling, no good butt down!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111385\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/les-miserables-jean-valjean-running.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She's not worth the trouble, so he lets her go and rushes to Fantine's bedside. Jean and the nurse give Fantine a reason to live by saying Cosette is there and will come in once she gets better. Enter Javert who barks about how Fantine and Jean Valjean are \"the scum of the earth.\" Um, dude, the woman has no teeth and is gasping for her last breaths, maybe consider dialing down the evil just a smidge?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Javert hates that idea and dials the evil up to 15, revealing to Fantine that Jean Valjean never went to get Cosette. Having had quite enough of everyone being the absolute worst, Fantine cashes in her one-way ticket to heaven.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111386\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/and-now-im-dead.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"430\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because Javert is a sociopath, he responds with, \"She's dead and you're my prisoner!\" Someone, please throw a dead horse on this man! Jean Valjean's hands are cuffed, which makes throwing animal corpses very difficult, so he settles for screaming in his general direction.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111387\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/jean-valjean-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>At the prison, they roughly chop off Jean Valjean's hair (they could have given him flattering layers but nooooo) and throw him in with Tramp Stamp, Sporty Spice Lover, Cilantro Hater and all the other prisoners. Jean Valjean tests one of the bars to see if it's loose. It isn't, but no worries; Jean managed to smuggle a chisel in his mouth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then, TWO YEARS PASS. So I'm guessing that chisel plan didn't work out? Fantine's ghost is like this right about now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-103627\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/05/judge-judy-watch-impatient-annoyed-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Outside of the Colman's inn, a busted-looking Cosette is doing hard labor when she spots a doll pop-up shop. It belongs to the creep who bought Fantine's hair and teeth. Cosette is captivated by one particular doll. Before she can realize, \u003cem>Hey, that's my mom's hair, you jerk!\u003c/em>, Olivia Colman shows up and beats Cosette for not working hard enough. Where's a cream pie when you need one?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back inside the inn, Olivia Colman chases Cosette around and whips her, while everyone cheers. Someone fetch me a time machine. I'm ready to help.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111389\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/want-me-to-kill-them.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Later that night, while fetching water at the creek, a shadowy figure appears behind Cosette. It's Jean Valjean! Sorry I doubted you, little mouth chisel!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean helps Cosette haul the buckets back to the inn and quickly learns that her caretakers belong in the ninth circle of Hell (the one reserved for treachery; I looked it up). He notices that the Colman's two daughters don't have to work and have fancy dolls, so Jean Valjean says, \u003cem>Hold my beer\u003c/em>, leaves for a few minutes and comes back with a doll for Cosette. It's the one made with Fantine's hair.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111390\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/burst-into-tears.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jean Valjean:\u003c/strong> \"I have a wish to see the child playing.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Olivia Colman:\u003c/strong> \"And who is going to serve you your supper?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Jean Valjean:\u003c/strong> \"You, madam. Now bring me my supper, woman.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111391\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/get-her-jade-coco-montrese.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"322\" height=\"248\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, Mr. Colman shows Jean Valjean to his room and offers to prostitute Cosette out to him for a price. Sorry, I don't make the rules, but the Colmans officially have to die now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111388\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/you-have-to-kill-them-no-naomi.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"250\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Instead, Jean Valjean pays them a crazy amount of money to adopt Cosette. Not exactly what I had in mind, but this will do, I suppose. (Although, for real, they should die.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few minutes after Jean Valjean and Cosette leave, Mr. Colman catches up with them. He wants even more money and pulls a gun on them. OMG, DIE ALREADY! Time to hulk out, Jean. SMASH HIM!!!!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111393\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/hulk-punch-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean knocks the gun away and puts Mr. Colman in a choke-hold and scares him off. Again, not exactly what I had in mind, but I'll take whatever morsel of good I can get out of this show.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101635\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/yay1.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"381\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean and Cosette make their way to Paris. When they arrive, Cosette asks if she still has to be a child slave. Jean Valjean replies, \"No, you don't have to sweep or go to the wood to fetch water. You don't have to do anything, except eat and sleep and play.\" Cosette is like:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111394\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/kacey-musgraves-what.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"286\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We get a cozy montage of Cosette learning new things, being happy and showing off her new dad around town. Can the story just end here, before any more bad stuff can happen?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Nope! A neighbor is already snooping around and asking too many questions.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111395\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/nosy-neighbor-lady.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"271\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cosette calls her a \"nosy old bitch.\" If any child has earned the right to sling curse words, it's for sure Cosette.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111396\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cussing-olsen-twin.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"390\" height=\"428\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cut to the police headquarters (ughhhhh, here we go again). Javert is back on his bullshit, \u003cdel>destroying lives for fun\u003c/del> implementing the law. After reading an incident report from the Colmans about how someone abducted Cosette, Javert looks into the claim and quickly realizes the Colmans are scammers. Great, so that means he'll leave Jean Valjean and Cosette in peace, right? Yeah, not so much. He commissions an artist to sketch a mugshot and pastes it all around Paris. It doesn't take long for the \"nosy old\" you-know-what to go tattling. 19TH-CENTURY FRANCE IS THE WORST!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-39750\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york-.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"200\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york-.gif 200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york--32x32.gif 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york--50x50.gif 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york--64x64.gif 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york--96x96.gif 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york--128x128.gif 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/10/tiffany-new-york--150x150.gif 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 200px) 100vw, 200px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Cut to Javert and a bunch of cops chasing Jean Valjean and Cosette through the streets. Cornered, Jean manages to climb over the city wall and plop into a convent. The nuns are like, \u003cem>GTFO! The only man we tolerate is Jesus. \u003c/em>(I don't blame them.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Javert sniffs out where Jean and Cosette are hiding and bangs on the convent door, demanding to be let in. The head nun thinks about it and then says:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-38850\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500.gif 245w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-32x32.gif 32w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-50x50.gif 50w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-64x64.gif 64w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-96x96.gif 96w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-128x128.gif 128w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2016/09/tumblr_inline_o6kfajYkhG1rkxo5g_500-150x150.gif 150w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 245px) 100vw, 245px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Head Nun:\u003c/strong> \"No man has stepped foot in this convent for many years, nor will do.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>What a queen! We stan!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, Jean Valjean offers Head Nun a proposition: he'll scram, as long as she takes care of Cosette. Head Nun has a counter-offer: she'll take care of Cosette, hire Jean as a gardener and let him stay hidden on the grounds so he can continue kicking it with Cosette.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107564\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/11/celebrate.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, back at Jean and Cosette's former apartment, Javert is fuming. \"HE WILL NEVER GET AWAY! SEARCH EVERYWHERE! HE WILL BE FOUND!\" Dude seriously needs to...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111397\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/get-a-life-jerk-weed-pete-and-pete.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>End scene!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: The Colmans, Nosy Old You-Know-What, Ms. Creepy Face, Javert and Pretty Much Everyone Else. \u003c/strong>Karma is fashionably late, but she's coming for your necks!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: Fantine. \u003c/strong>I dreamed a dream that she would get to star in \u003cem>Kill Bill 3: Fantine's Revenge\u003c/em>, but things didn't really work out that way. We'll always have this Photoshop image though.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111341\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-1020x573.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-1020x573.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-1200x674.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill.jpg 1600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong> \u003cstrong>Cosette. \u003c/strong>But all is not lost! Now that Cosette is free, she's available to star in \u003cem>Kill Bill 3: Cosette's Revenge\u003c/em>! So many people to kill, so little time.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111398\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill-1020x573.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill-1020x573.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill-1200x674.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/cosette-as-kill-bill.jpg 1600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>SILVER: Jean Valjean. \u003c/strong>His transformation into a certified DILF brings a tear to my eye and a tingle to my... you know what, nevermind.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cstrong>GOLD: Head Nun\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">. \u003c/span>\u003c/strong>\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">My heart already belongs to a lot of nuns from \u003cem>The Sound of Music\u003c/em> and \u003cem>Sister Act\u003c/em>, but I'm definitely making room for one more. Bless her heart (and her ability to shut down overly confident men)!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/game-of-thrones\">\u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>Previous Recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/111154/les-miserables-episode-2-pbs-bbc-recap-voulez-vous-coucher-avec-moi\">'Les Miserables' Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-Vous Coucher Avec Moi?\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"disqusTitle": "'Les Miserables' Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-Vous Coucher Avec Moi?",
"title": "'Les Miserables' Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-Vous Coucher Avec Moi?",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/110513/les-miserables-pbs-bbc-episode-1-recap-un-break-my-heart\">the previous episode of \u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/110513/les-miserables-pbs-bbc-episode-1-recap-un-break-my-heart\">Les Miserables\u003c/a>, \u003c/i>a lot of miserable things happened.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We were forced to watch a gazillion horses die at Waterloo because being scarred for life by Artex's death scene in \u003cem>The Neverending Story\u003c/em> just wasn't enough.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110945\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/artax-neverending-story.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"149\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fantine met a scrub named Felix, who wasted no time ruining her life.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110998\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/i-hate-men-kiss-me-kate.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"568\" height=\"312\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Marius Pontmercy was brainwashed into being #TeamRoyalism, as well as #TeamAlcoholism.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110985\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/les-miserables-wine-drinking.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And, as a side-effect of serving 19 years in prison for stealing one lousy piece of bread, Jean Valjean's face gradually became allergic to any act of kindness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110997\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/les-miserables-valjean-mad.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>What absurdly tragic things will occur this week? Let's find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fantine roams the countryside with Cosette in tow. The past few years have not been kind to her. From the looks of it, she can no longer afford shampoo.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In an alternate universe, Fantine never met Felix and managed to work her way into the middle class, thus finding happiness and being able to afford not only shampoo but the haircut du jour, The Rachel™!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-111286\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"521\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut.jpg 876w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut-160x209.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut-800x1043.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut-768x1001.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alas, we're in the darkest timeline, so Fantine and her unwashed hair keep trucking all the way to some sad little country town, where she meets my favorite from \u003cem>The Favourite\u003c/em>, Olivia Colman! Maybe things are looking up??\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111170\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/olivia-colman.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"270\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fantine asks Olivia Colman something any of us would ask a complete stranger: \u003cem>Hey, I know this sounds weird, and obviously no pressure, but do you mind adopting my kid for a couple of months?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Money symbols bloom in Olivia Colman's eyes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111280\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/olivia-colman-les-miserables-fantine-cosette-pbs.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"374\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Olivia Colman agrees to look after Cosette... for a hefty price, which is then made heftier by Olivia Colman's scammer husband. If he looks familiar, that's because he's the corpse robber from the season premiere. These days, he's more into robbing the living while masquerading as a benevolent war hero. I don't know about you, but the gross injustices on this show are starting to make my eye twitch.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111281\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eye-twitch-mo-the-simpsons.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"284\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The Colmans promise to take very good care of Cosette. Translation: they promise to make her sleep in a barn and routinely blow cigarette smoke in her face. Needless to say, I take back my suggestion that things might be looking up. #ItDoesntGetBetter.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fantine eventually makes it to a village called Montreuil, just in time to attend a pep rally being held in honor of the town's mayor, Père Madeleine. But we know him by another name...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110990\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/les-miserables-jean-valjean.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Stealing silverware from woke bishops and coins from little boys got old, so now his alter ego saves children from house fires and hands out jobs at his booming factory.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111294\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/you-get-a-oprah-car-job.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One of those jobs goes to Montreuil's newest resident, Fantine. But not before an awkward interview process involving this lady's creepy face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111171\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-weird-lady-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"224\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fantine gets right to work crafting beaded necklaces that are either rosaries or Mardi Gras accessories (choose your own adventure). I would say things are looking up again, but I'm sure something horrific will happen in a few minutes, so I'll just zip it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few weeks later, the new police chief shows up at the factory to meet Jean Valjean. It's none other than Inspector Javert. Quick! Suspend your disbelief because Javert somehow doesn't recognize the person he tortured for 19 solid years. It's like how everyone can't imagine Clark Kent being Superman just because he's wearing glasses.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111333\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/it-is-you-superman.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Javert goes on a Kanye West-style rant that no one asked for about how criminals are inherently wicked and degenerate. He vows to prosecute any wrong-doers in town, especially those who might be leading a double life. Jean Valjean's contribution to the conversation is simply making this face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111296\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/awkward-freeze.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Things aren't looking too great for Fantine either. After Fantine is caught making a little bird out of Mardi Gras beads, Creepy Interview Face Lady threatens to fire her and then decides \u003cem>You know what? I'm not doing anything later. I think I'll spy on this poor girl and figure out a way to ruin her life!\u003c/em> Somewhere out there, Felix is like, \u003cem>Hey! That's my thing!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ms. Creepy Face finds out about Cosette and goes to check out the situation. The Colmans tell her Fantine is a prostitute who abandoned her daughter to go have a bunch of dirty sex. Despite that far-fetched-sounding story and Cosette blinking \"HELP ME, CREEPY LADY!\" in Morse code, Ms. Creepy Face decides to believe the Colmans and destroy Fantine. There goes my eye twitch again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111298\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eye-twitch-squidward-spongebob.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"382\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of French prostitutes, Marius' grandfather sure looks like one.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111299\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"772\" height=\"466\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM.png 772w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM-160x97.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM-768x464.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 772px) 100vw, 772px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It seems as though he learned how to do his makeup by watching YouTube tutorials from these two:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111304\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"550\" height=\"539\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup.jpg 550w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-160x157.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 550px) 100vw, 550px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111303\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1020x765.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"480\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1020x765.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-160x120.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-800x600.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-768x576.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1200x900.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1920x1440.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despite looking a hot mess, Marius' grandfather invites a bunch of people with equally tragic makeup over to rag on Napoleon some more. Dudes, you won! Get a hobby! From one drag queen to another:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111326\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/get-a-grip-get-a-life-and-get-over-it-alyssa-edwards.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"299\" height=\"180\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Little Marius is invited to take a break from tasting fine wines to recite some pro-monarchy propaganda for all the fugly drag queens until a note is delivered saying that his dad is on his death bed. When Marius arrives at his father's bedside, Pontmercy Senior only has enough strength to utter a few words: \u003cem>Napoleon rules! Oh, and there was this dude who saved my life and totally didn't rob me at Waterloo. Go reward him, please. Peace out!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111334\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pontmercy-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in Montreuil, a loaded horse-drawn cart collapses on someone and is slowly crushing him to death. Jean Valjean wants to help, but Javert is watching and waiting for him to reenact the lifting of the boulder from the season premiere and prove that he really is The Artist Formerly Known As Prisoner #24601. After an awkward staredown, Jean Valjean decides to Hulk out, consequences be damned.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The glow-up is real:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-110983\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1020x465.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"292\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1020x465.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-160x73.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-800x365.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-768x350.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1200x547.png 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM.png 1276w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111321\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-1020x474.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"297\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-160x74.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-800x372.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-768x357.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone celebrates the rescue of the crushed random dude. Everyone except for Javert. Instead of realizing that Jean Valjean is a good person, Javert doubles down on trying to ruin his life over a piece of bread and a child's coin. I'll give the same advice I gave the \u003cem>RuPaul's Drag Race\u003c/em> rejects: Get a hobby!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111327\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/you-are-so-cranky-get-a-life-olsen-twins.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"358\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When Jean Valjean returns to the factory, imagining another 19 years in the clink, Ms. Creepy Face is busy yelling that Fantine is a \"lying little whore!\" Valjean is not in the mood so he fires Fantine and advises her to leave town for not telling him she had a child out of wedlock. My eye twitch is getting really bad.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111322\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/that-doesnt-make-sense-eye-twitch.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"412\" height=\"303\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Javert rushes to the police headquarters in Paris to tattle on Jean Valjean. Their response is in perfect alignment with mine:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111325\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/get-a-life-loser-ramona-rhony.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After burying St. Woke Bishop's candlesticks in the woods, Jean Valjean runs into Javert (okay, how small is this town??). Jean Valjean fails to recite the appropriate Mariah Carey lyric:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97098\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/why-are-you-so-obsessed-with-me-mariah-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"325\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because continually upping their price isn't evil enough, the Colmans inform Fantine that they need almost triple what she sent last time to care for Cosette. So Fantine feels she has no other choice but to sell her hair and front teeth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97368\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/make_it_stop_boy_meets_world.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"215\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When that's not enough, she sells her body. It's too bad this adaptation doesn't have any songs because we could use a jolly one right about now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111328\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/stewie-family-guy-rocking-back-and-forth-crazy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"375\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One night, some rich douche mocks Fantine and then assaults her. Fantine responds by trying to scratch his eyes out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101824\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/yas-excited-crying-happy-tears-antm.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"260\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111331\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/he-had-it-coming-chicago.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Unfortunately, Javert rips Fantine off of Rich Douche before she can finish the job.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107101\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/09/disappointed-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"320\" height=\"234\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Javert vows to imprison Fantine for six months. While she's being taken away, Jean Valjean shows up (but for real, how tiny is this town?!?) and wants to help. Fantine is like, \u003cem>Really?? Now you want to help?!? You fired and exiled me for being a mom and making a bird out of beads, remember????\u003c/em> She then spits blood into his face. I approve this message.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106639\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/proud-of-you-thumbs-up-compute-kid-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean says, \u003cem>My bad\u003c/em>, and promises to take care of Fantine and send for Cosette. In the wise words of JoJo, it's just too little too late. But nice try, I guess.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, while looking over Fantine, who of course has fallen deathly ill because we can't have a single good thing happen in this story, Jean Valjean is visited by Javert. Somehow, Javert is still not receptive to my solid advice:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111324\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/you-have-to-get-a-hobby-rhony-bethenny.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Javert tells Jean Valjean that he's resigning as head of police and very sorry for thinking he was Prisoner #24601. They've caught the real Jean Valjean and he's about to be thrown in jail for life for stealing that kid's coin unless someone was to show up to his trial tomorrow proving that he's innocent (HINT, HINT!).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean runs home to burn his passport and prison outfit. That kid's stupid, lousy coin falls out, inspiring a full-blown meltdown, which closely resembles what I look like while watching this show:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111339\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/me-watching-les-mis.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Jean Valjean's conscience has gotten to him. He asks Ms. Creepy Face to fetch Cosette so Fantine can see her daughter one last time before dying. Then, he races off to Fake Jean Valjean's trial to turn himself in. Will he get there in time? Will Ms. Creepy Face actually bring Cosette to Fantine's death bed? The screen goes black so we'll have to wait and see.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: The Colmans. \u003c/strong>Fantine's ghost is going to have so much fun haunting these monsters. That's a karmic start, but I also need someone to stop by and punch out their front teeth. An eye for an eye, and all of that. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: Whichever Illnesses End Up Killing Felix and Ms. Creepy Face. \u003c/strong>Hurry up, will you?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong> \u003cstrong>All The Poisonous Lead In Grandpa Pontmercy's Makeup. \u003c/strong>Thanks for your service.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>SILVER: Cosette and Marius. \u003c/strong>Hang in there, babies!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cstrong>GOLD: Fantine\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">. \u003c/span>\u003c/strong>\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">I doubt she'll survive, but if she does, can the rest of this series be \u003cem>Kill Bill 3: Fantine's Revenge\u003c/em>? Thank you.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111341\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-1020x573.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-1020x573.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-1200x674.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill.jpg 1600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/game-of-thrones\">\u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>Previous Recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/110513/les-miserables-pbs-bbc-episode-1-recap-un-break-my-heart\">'Les Miserables' Episode 1 Recap: Un-Break My Heart\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Need a laugh or two after this week's traumatic episode? This recap has your back!",
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"headline": "'Les Miserables' Episode 2 Recap: Voulez-Vous Coucher Avec Moi?",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>In \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/110513/les-miserables-pbs-bbc-episode-1-recap-un-break-my-heart\">the previous episode of \u003c/a>\u003ci>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/110513/les-miserables-pbs-bbc-episode-1-recap-un-break-my-heart\">Les Miserables\u003c/a>, \u003c/i>a lot of miserable things happened.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We were forced to watch a gazillion horses die at Waterloo because being scarred for life by Artex's death scene in \u003cem>The Neverending Story\u003c/em> just wasn't enough.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110945\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/artax-neverending-story.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"149\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fantine met a scrub named Felix, who wasted no time ruining her life.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110998\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/i-hate-men-kiss-me-kate.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"568\" height=\"312\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Marius Pontmercy was brainwashed into being #TeamRoyalism, as well as #TeamAlcoholism.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110985\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/les-miserables-wine-drinking.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And, as a side-effect of serving 19 years in prison for stealing one lousy piece of bread, Jean Valjean's face gradually became allergic to any act of kindness.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110997\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/les-miserables-valjean-mad.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>What absurdly tragic things will occur this week? Let's find out!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fantine roams the countryside with Cosette in tow. The past few years have not been kind to her. From the looks of it, she can no longer afford shampoo.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In an alternate universe, Fantine never met Felix and managed to work her way into the middle class, thus finding happiness and being able to afford not only shampoo but the haircut du jour, The Rachel™!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter wp-image-111286\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"521\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut.jpg 876w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut-160x209.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut-800x1043.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-rachel-from-friends-haircut-768x1001.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Alas, we're in the darkest timeline, so Fantine and her unwashed hair keep trucking all the way to some sad little country town, where she meets my favorite from \u003cem>The Favourite\u003c/em>, Olivia Colman! Maybe things are looking up??\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111170\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/olivia-colman.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"270\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fantine asks Olivia Colman something any of us would ask a complete stranger: \u003cem>Hey, I know this sounds weird, and obviously no pressure, but do you mind adopting my kid for a couple of months?\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Money symbols bloom in Olivia Colman's eyes.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111280\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/olivia-colman-les-miserables-fantine-cosette-pbs.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"498\" height=\"374\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Olivia Colman agrees to look after Cosette... for a hefty price, which is then made heftier by Olivia Colman's scammer husband. If he looks familiar, that's because he's the corpse robber from the season premiere. These days, he's more into robbing the living while masquerading as a benevolent war hero. I don't know about you, but the gross injustices on this show are starting to make my eye twitch.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111281\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eye-twitch-mo-the-simpsons.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"360\" height=\"284\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The Colmans promise to take very good care of Cosette. Translation: they promise to make her sleep in a barn and routinely blow cigarette smoke in her face. Needless to say, I take back my suggestion that things might be looking up. #ItDoesntGetBetter.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fantine eventually makes it to a village called Montreuil, just in time to attend a pep rally being held in honor of the town's mayor, Père Madeleine. But we know him by another name...\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-110990\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/les-miserables-jean-valjean.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"226\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Stealing silverware from woke bishops and coins from little boys got old, so now his alter ego saves children from house fires and hands out jobs at his booming factory.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111294\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/you-get-a-oprah-car-job.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"150\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One of those jobs goes to Montreuil's newest resident, Fantine. But not before an awkward interview process involving this lady's creepy face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111171\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-weird-lady-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"224\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Fantine gets right to work crafting beaded necklaces that are either rosaries or Mardi Gras accessories (choose your own adventure). I would say things are looking up again, but I'm sure something horrific will happen in a few minutes, so I'll just zip it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A few weeks later, the new police chief shows up at the factory to meet Jean Valjean. It's none other than Inspector Javert. Quick! Suspend your disbelief because Javert somehow doesn't recognize the person he tortured for 19 solid years. It's like how everyone can't imagine Clark Kent being Superman just because he's wearing glasses.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111333\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/it-is-you-superman.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"245\" height=\"280\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Javert goes on a Kanye West-style rant that no one asked for about how criminals are inherently wicked and degenerate. He vows to prosecute any wrong-doers in town, especially those who might be leading a double life. Jean Valjean's contribution to the conversation is simply making this face:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111296\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/awkward-freeze.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Things aren't looking too great for Fantine either. After Fantine is caught making a little bird out of Mardi Gras beads, Creepy Interview Face Lady threatens to fire her and then decides \u003cem>You know what? I'm not doing anything later. I think I'll spy on this poor girl and figure out a way to ruin her life!\u003c/em> Somewhere out there, Felix is like, \u003cem>Hey! That's my thing!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Ms. Creepy Face finds out about Cosette and goes to check out the situation. The Colmans tell her Fantine is a prostitute who abandoned her daughter to go have a bunch of dirty sex. Despite that far-fetched-sounding story and Cosette blinking \"HELP ME, CREEPY LADY!\" in Morse code, Ms. Creepy Face decides to believe the Colmans and destroy Fantine. There goes my eye twitch again.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111298\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/eye-twitch-squidward-spongebob.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"382\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Speaking of French prostitutes, Marius' grandfather sure looks like one.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111299\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"772\" height=\"466\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM.png 772w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM-160x97.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-23-at-5.33.33-PM-768x464.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 772px) 100vw, 772px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It seems as though he learned how to do his makeup by watching YouTube tutorials from these two:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111304\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"550\" height=\"539\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup.jpg 550w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-160x157.jpg 160w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 550px) 100vw, 550px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111303\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1020x765.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"480\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1020x765.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-160x120.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-800x600.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-768x576.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1200x900.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2-1920x1440.jpg 1920w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/scary-makeup-2.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Despite looking a hot mess, Marius' grandfather invites a bunch of people with equally tragic makeup over to rag on Napoleon some more. Dudes, you won! Get a hobby! From one drag queen to another:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111326\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/get-a-grip-get-a-life-and-get-over-it-alyssa-edwards.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"299\" height=\"180\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Little Marius is invited to take a break from tasting fine wines to recite some pro-monarchy propaganda for all the fugly drag queens until a note is delivered saying that his dad is on his death bed. When Marius arrives at his father's bedside, Pontmercy Senior only has enough strength to utter a few words: \u003cem>Napoleon rules! Oh, and there was this dude who saved my life and totally didn't rob me at Waterloo. Go reward him, please. Peace out!\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111334\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/pontmercy-les-miserables.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Back in Montreuil, a loaded horse-drawn cart collapses on someone and is slowly crushing him to death. Jean Valjean wants to help, but Javert is watching and waiting for him to reenact the lifting of the boulder from the season premiere and prove that he really is The Artist Formerly Known As Prisoner #24601. After an awkward staredown, Jean Valjean decides to Hulk out, consequences be damned.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The glow-up is real:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-110983\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1020x465.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"292\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1020x465.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-160x73.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-800x365.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-768x350.png 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM-1200x547.png 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-3.21.32-PM.png 1276w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111321\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-1020x474.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"297\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM.png 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-160x74.png 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-800x372.png 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/Screen-Shot-2019-04-24-at-12.11.04-PM-768x357.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Everyone celebrates the rescue of the crushed random dude. Everyone except for Javert. Instead of realizing that Jean Valjean is a good person, Javert doubles down on trying to ruin his life over a piece of bread and a child's coin. I'll give the same advice I gave the \u003cem>RuPaul's Drag Race\u003c/em> rejects: Get a hobby!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111327\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/you-are-so-cranky-get-a-life-olsen-twins.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"358\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When Jean Valjean returns to the factory, imagining another 19 years in the clink, Ms. Creepy Face is busy yelling that Fantine is a \"lying little whore!\" Valjean is not in the mood so he fires Fantine and advises her to leave town for not telling him she had a child out of wedlock. My eye twitch is getting really bad.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111322\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/that-doesnt-make-sense-eye-twitch.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"412\" height=\"303\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Meanwhile, Javert rushes to the police headquarters in Paris to tattle on Jean Valjean. Their response is in perfect alignment with mine:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111325\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/get-a-life-loser-ramona-rhony.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"225\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>After burying St. Woke Bishop's candlesticks in the woods, Jean Valjean runs into Javert (okay, how small is this town??). Jean Valjean fails to recite the appropriate Mariah Carey lyric:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97098\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/10/why-are-you-so-obsessed-with-me-mariah-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"325\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Because continually upping their price isn't evil enough, the Colmans inform Fantine that they need almost triple what she sent last time to care for Cosette. So Fantine feels she has no other choice but to sell her hair and front teeth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-97368\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2017/11/make_it_stop_boy_meets_world.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"215\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When that's not enough, she sells her body. It's too bad this adaptation doesn't have any songs because we could use a jolly one right about now.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111328\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/stewie-family-guy-rocking-back-and-forth-crazy.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"375\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>One night, some rich douche mocks Fantine and then assaults her. Fantine responds by trying to scratch his eyes out.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-101824\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/02/yas-excited-crying-happy-tears-antm.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"260\" height=\"200\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111331\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/he-had-it-coming-chicago.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"242\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Unfortunately, Javert rips Fantine off of Rich Douche before she can finish the job.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-107101\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/09/disappointed-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"320\" height=\"234\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Javert vows to imprison Fantine for six months. While she's being taken away, Jean Valjean shows up (but for real, how tiny is this town?!?) and wants to help. Fantine is like, \u003cem>Really?? Now you want to help?!? You fired and exiled me for being a mom and making a bird out of beads, remember????\u003c/em> She then spits blood into his face. I approve this message.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-106639\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2018/10/proud-of-you-thumbs-up-compute-kid-gif.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"360\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean says, \u003cem>My bad\u003c/em>, and promises to take care of Fantine and send for Cosette. In the wise words of JoJo, it's just too little too late. But nice try, I guess.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That night, while looking over Fantine, who of course has fallen deathly ill because we can't have a single good thing happen in this story, Jean Valjean is visited by Javert. Somehow, Javert is still not receptive to my solid advice:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111324\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/you-have-to-get-a-hobby-rhony-bethenny.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Javert tells Jean Valjean that he's resigning as head of police and very sorry for thinking he was Prisoner #24601. They've caught the real Jean Valjean and he's about to be thrown in jail for life for stealing that kid's coin unless someone was to show up to his trial tomorrow proving that he's innocent (HINT, HINT!).\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jean Valjean runs home to burn his passport and prison outfit. That kid's stupid, lousy coin falls out, inspiring a full-blown meltdown, which closely resembles what I look like while watching this show:\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-111339\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/me-watching-les-mis.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"480\" height=\"218\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The next day, Jean Valjean's conscience has gotten to him. He asks Ms. Creepy Face to fetch Cosette so Fantine can see her daughter one last time before dying. Then, he races off to Fake Jean Valjean's trial to turn himself in. Will he get there in time? Will Ms. Creepy Face actually bring Cosette to Fantine's death bed? The screen goes black so we'll have to wait and see.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>After every episode, it’s only right to reward characters who’ve impressed and diss the ones that haven’t, so here goes:\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>PIECE OF COAL: The Colmans. \u003c/strong>Fantine's ghost is going to have so much fun haunting these monsters. That's a karmic start, but I also need someone to stop by and punch out their front teeth. An eye for an eye, and all of that. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>HONORABLE MENTION: Whichever Illnesses End Up Killing Felix and Ms. Creepy Face. \u003c/strong>Hurry up, will you?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>BRONZE:\u003c/strong> \u003cstrong>All The Poisonous Lead In Grandpa Pontmercy's Makeup. \u003c/strong>Thanks for your service.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">\u003cstrong>SILVER: Cosette and Marius. \u003c/strong>Hang in there, babies!\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp class=\"m_-8500230470282184039p1\">\u003cstrong>GOLD: Fantine\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">. \u003c/span>\u003c/strong>\u003cspan class=\"m_-8500230470282184039s1\">I doubt she'll survive, but if she does, can the rest of this series be \u003cem>Kill Bill 3: Fantine's Revenge\u003c/em>? Thank you.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cimg class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-111341\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-1020x573.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" srcset=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-1020x573.jpg 1020w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-160x90.jpg 160w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-800x450.jpg 800w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-768x432.jpg 768w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill-1200x674.jpg 1200w, https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/12/2019/04/fantine-as-kill-bill.jpg 1600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\">\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Until next week! If you miss my thoughts on \u003cem>Les Miserables\u003c/em> or pop culture in general, follow me on Twitter \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/xcusemybeauty\">@xcusemybeauty\u003c/a>, listen to my podcast \u003ca href=\"https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-cooler/id1041117499?mt=2\">\u003cem>The Cooler\u003c/em>\u003c/a> or read my other \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/recaps\">\u003ci>r\u003c/i>ecaps\u003c/a> (\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/poldark\">\u003cem>Poldark\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/victoria\">\u003cem>Victoria\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/downton-abbey\">\u003cem>Downton Abbey\u003c/em>\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/tag/game-of-thrones\">\u003cem>Game of Thrones\u003c/em>\u003c/a>)!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center\">\u003cem>\u003cstrong>Previous Recaps:\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/pop/110513/les-miserables-pbs-bbc-episode-1-recap-un-break-my-heart\">'Les Miserables' Episode 1 Recap: Un-Break My Heart\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"disqusTitle": "Huge Bets, Fast Buzzer: Sports Bettor Smashes 'Jeopardy!' Records",
"title": "Huge Bets, Fast Buzzer: Sports Bettor Smashes 'Jeopardy!' Records",
"headTitle": "KQED Pop | KQED Arts",
"content": "\u003cp>A new star has risen on a classic game show.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>James Holzhauer, a Las Vegas professional sports bettor, is on a \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> hot streak. He has breezily won the last 12 games in a row.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But most notably, the 34-year-old is drawing attention for his unique strategy and big bets. Over the 12 wins as of Friday, he now holds the \u003ca href=\"https://www.jeopardy.com/contestant-zone/hall-of-fame\">top five slots for single-day winning records\u003c/a> on the show in regular play, racking up a total of $851,926.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Last week, he won $131,127 in a single game, setting yet another new record. He answered every single question correctly that he buzzed in for. Before his appearance on the show, the previous single-day record in regular play was $77,000.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For comparison, Ken Jennings, the show's most successful player ever during nontournament play, had won $410,158 after 12 games, \u003ca href=\"https://thejeopardyfan.com/2019/04/james-holzhauer-ken-jennings-comparison.html\">according to The Jeopardy Fan\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/KenJennings/status/1118727290249068544?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1118727290249068544&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.npr.org%2F2019%2F04%2F22%2F714626647%2Fhuge-bets-fast-buzzer-sports-bettor-smashes-jeopardy-records\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"All good professional gamblers are selectively aggressive. You need to pick your spots and bet big when you identify them,\" Holzhauer tells NPR over email. \"That's basically my \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> strategy in a nutshell.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Holzhauer starts by choosing the highest-value clues on the six-by-five board. Contestants have typically started with the lowest value of a category and worked down the board to the more valuable spots.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"You need a decent-sized bankroll to bet for profit, which is why I start at the bottom of the board,\" he says. That bankroll pays off when he hits a \"Daily Double,\" a question where he can bet more if he has more money in his pocket already. And he routinely bets everything he has.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/Jeopardy/status/1118710748681687041?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1118710748681687041&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.npr.org%2F2019%2F04%2F22%2F714626647%2Fhuge-bets-fast-buzzer-sports-bettor-smashes-jeopardy-records\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The show's host, Alex Trebek, put it simply during a recent show: \"If you control the board and constantly come up with correct responses, you're likely to hit most of the Daily Doubles, which is what you do,\" he remarked to Holzhauer. He asked the other contestants: \"How does it feel to come into a buzz saw?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Holzhauer, who has a degree in math from the University of Illinois, says that sports betting comes naturally to him. \"There's nothing better for my interests and talents than combining math and sports for profit.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He says he initially focused on baseball \"because it is the easiest sport to break down mathematically, but as betting markets have adjusted, I'm spending more time on football and hockey now.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>His grandmother, who is now deceased, inspired him to try out for the show.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"She moved from Japan to help raise me and my brother, spoke barely any English, if anything at all,\" he told Trebek \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/Jeopardy/status/1118987747027329024\">in a recent episode\u003c/a>. \"But \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> was on in the afternoon at our house. ... She would watch the program with me even though she didn't understand a lick of it. And I promised her someday, she'd see me on the stage up here.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"So, I hope wherever she is right now, she's looking down,\" Holzhauer added. He has written a short message in her honor on the final question's write-in space. On other days, he has given shout-outs to his young child and other family and friends.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Holzhauer dominates across topics—with answers such as \"Who is Aquaman?\" \"What is the Reformation?\" \"What is\u003cem> Quantum Leap\u003c/em>?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He says some categories come more easily to him than others. \"I spent almost no time studying categories like geography and sports, even though they came up frequently on \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em>, because I'm already strong in those subjects,\" he tells NPR. Categories he says he did spend time reviewing: animals, classical music and literature.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In 2004,\u003cem> Jeopardy!\u003c/em> champion Ken Jennings eventually went on to win 74 straight games and more than $2.5 million.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"I'm just gobsmacked by James,\" \u003ca href=\"https://www.wired.com/story/ken-jennings-james-holzhauer-jeopardy/?utm_source=pocket-newtab\">Jennings told \u003cem>Wired\u003c/em>\u003c/a>. \"It's absolutely insane what he's doing. Like, I thought I had seen everything on \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> And this is something I would have thought was just impossible, these numbers.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He says he played the game very differently. \"I was playing a game show like I had on my couch. My top priority wasn't maximizing winnings,\" he said. \"I would never have had the stomach for those kinds of bets.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jennings told the magazine that he is surprised his record has stood for some 15 years. \"As a fan of the show, I'm actually rooting for James or anybody who can take a swing at that record,\" he added.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/Jeopardy/status/1115343556498022405?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1115343556498022405&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.npr.org%2F2019%2F04%2F22%2F714626647%2Fhuge-bets-fast-buzzer-sports-bettor-smashes-jeopardy-records\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>On April 8, \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> released a \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/Jeopardy/status/1115343556498022405\">trailer pumping up\u003c/a> excitement about the new challenger. \"This April ... every record ... is in \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em>\" it said. \"The next great champion ... is coming. ... Is it too soon to start making comparisons with Ken Jennings?\" (\u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> is taped in advance—the episodes that have aired thus far were taped in early February, Holzhauer said.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"It's an honor to be compared to him, but he and I play very differently,\" said Holzhauer. \"Studying his game film would be about as useful as someone my size trying to play like Shaq in a pickup basketball game.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Holzhauer has shown extraordinary speed with the buzzer—and it's notoriously difficult to get that timing right.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Originally on the show, contestants could buzz in as soon as the clue appeared. That \"led to a lot of quick guesses, negative scores and general confusion,\" \u003ca href=\"https://www.jeopardy.com/jbuzz/behind-scenes/how-does-jeopardy-buzzer-work\">Jeopardy!'s website says\u003c/a>. These days, the contestants can't buzz in until Trebek has finished reading the clue. Then, a staff member pushes a button that illuminates lights on either side of the game board and opens up the system to allow contestants to buzz in.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>However, if a contestant buzzes in before the system is operating, he or she gets locked out for a quarter of second—a huge disadvantage when tiny fractions of a second determine who has the edge. As \u003cem>The Ringer\u003c/em> reported, before he appeared on the show, Holzhauer practiced his timing using \u003ca href=\"https://www.theringer.com/tv/2019/4/18/18456756/james-holzhauer-jeopardy-winner-alex-trebek-ken-jennings\">an improvised buzzer\u003c/a>—a mechanical pencil wrapped in masking tape.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> success hasn't changed his life much yet—\"I would say I'm currently a C-list celebrity with Vegas locals,\" Holzhauer says. But that may be different when he visits his hometown of Naperville, Ill., where he hears his success is generating a lot of buzz. \"My dad has never been more popular,\" he adds.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And at this point, he says sportsbook managers have said they are rooting for him. \"Maybe they think I will stop betting on sports if I stay on \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> forever,\" Holzhauer adds.\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org\">NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=Huge+Bets%2C+Fast+Buzzer%3A+Sports+Bettor+Smashes+%27Jeopardy%21%27+Records&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n",
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"excerpt": "Over his 12-day winning streak, James Holzhauer now holds the top five slots for single-day winning records on the show. \"You need to pick your spots and bet big,\" he tells NPR. ",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>A new star has risen on a classic game show.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>James Holzhauer, a Las Vegas professional sports bettor, is on a \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> hot streak. He has breezily won the last 12 games in a row.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But most notably, the 34-year-old is drawing attention for his unique strategy and big bets. Over the 12 wins as of Friday, he now holds the \u003ca href=\"https://www.jeopardy.com/contestant-zone/hall-of-fame\">top five slots for single-day winning records\u003c/a> on the show in regular play, racking up a total of $851,926.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Last week, he won $131,127 in a single game, setting yet another new record. He answered every single question correctly that he buzzed in for. Before his appearance on the show, the previous single-day record in regular play was $77,000.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>For comparison, Ken Jennings, the show's most successful player ever during nontournament play, had won $410,158 after 12 games, \u003ca href=\"https://thejeopardyfan.com/2019/04/james-holzhauer-ken-jennings-comparison.html\">according to The Jeopardy Fan\u003c/a>.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>\"All good professional gamblers are selectively aggressive. You need to pick your spots and bet big when you identify them,\" Holzhauer tells NPR over email. \"That's basically my \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> strategy in a nutshell.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Holzhauer starts by choosing the highest-value clues on the six-by-five board. Contestants have typically started with the lowest value of a category and worked down the board to the more valuable spots.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"You need a decent-sized bankroll to bet for profit, which is why I start at the bottom of the board,\" he says. That bankroll pays off when he hits a \"Daily Double,\" a question where he can bet more if he has more money in his pocket already. And he routinely bets everything he has.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>The show's host, Alex Trebek, put it simply during a recent show: \"If you control the board and constantly come up with correct responses, you're likely to hit most of the Daily Doubles, which is what you do,\" he remarked to Holzhauer. He asked the other contestants: \"How does it feel to come into a buzz saw?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Holzhauer, who has a degree in math from the University of Illinois, says that sports betting comes naturally to him. \"There's nothing better for my interests and talents than combining math and sports for profit.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He says he initially focused on baseball \"because it is the easiest sport to break down mathematically, but as betting markets have adjusted, I'm spending more time on football and hockey now.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>His grandmother, who is now deceased, inspired him to try out for the show.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"She moved from Japan to help raise me and my brother, spoke barely any English, if anything at all,\" he told Trebek \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/Jeopardy/status/1118987747027329024\">in a recent episode\u003c/a>. \"But \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> was on in the afternoon at our house. ... She would watch the program with me even though she didn't understand a lick of it. And I promised her someday, she'd see me on the stage up here.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"So, I hope wherever she is right now, she's looking down,\" Holzhauer added. He has written a short message in her honor on the final question's write-in space. On other days, he has given shout-outs to his young child and other family and friends.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Holzhauer dominates across topics—with answers such as \"Who is Aquaman?\" \"What is the Reformation?\" \"What is\u003cem> Quantum Leap\u003c/em>?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He says some categories come more easily to him than others. \"I spent almost no time studying categories like geography and sports, even though they came up frequently on \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em>, because I'm already strong in those subjects,\" he tells NPR. Categories he says he did spend time reviewing: animals, classical music and literature.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In 2004,\u003cem> Jeopardy!\u003c/em> champion Ken Jennings eventually went on to win 74 straight games and more than $2.5 million.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"I'm just gobsmacked by James,\" \u003ca href=\"https://www.wired.com/story/ken-jennings-james-holzhauer-jeopardy/?utm_source=pocket-newtab\">Jennings told \u003cem>Wired\u003c/em>\u003c/a>. \"It's absolutely insane what he's doing. Like, I thought I had seen everything on \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> And this is something I would have thought was just impossible, these numbers.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He says he played the game very differently. \"I was playing a game show like I had on my couch. My top priority wasn't maximizing winnings,\" he said. \"I would never have had the stomach for those kinds of bets.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jennings told the magazine that he is surprised his record has stood for some 15 years. \"As a fan of the show, I'm actually rooting for James or anybody who can take a swing at that record,\" he added.\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>On April 8, \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> released a \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/Jeopardy/status/1115343556498022405\">trailer pumping up\u003c/a> excitement about the new challenger. \"This April ... every record ... is in \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em>\" it said. \"The next great champion ... is coming. ... Is it too soon to start making comparisons with Ken Jennings?\" (\u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> is taped in advance—the episodes that have aired thus far were taped in early February, Holzhauer said.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"It's an honor to be compared to him, but he and I play very differently,\" said Holzhauer. \"Studying his game film would be about as useful as someone my size trying to play like Shaq in a pickup basketball game.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Holzhauer has shown extraordinary speed with the buzzer—and it's notoriously difficult to get that timing right.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Originally on the show, contestants could buzz in as soon as the clue appeared. That \"led to a lot of quick guesses, negative scores and general confusion,\" \u003ca href=\"https://www.jeopardy.com/jbuzz/behind-scenes/how-does-jeopardy-buzzer-work\">Jeopardy!'s website says\u003c/a>. These days, the contestants can't buzz in until Trebek has finished reading the clue. Then, a staff member pushes a button that illuminates lights on either side of the game board and opens up the system to allow contestants to buzz in.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>However, if a contestant buzzes in before the system is operating, he or she gets locked out for a quarter of second—a huge disadvantage when tiny fractions of a second determine who has the edge. As \u003cem>The Ringer\u003c/em> reported, before he appeared on the show, Holzhauer practiced his timing using \u003ca href=\"https://www.theringer.com/tv/2019/4/18/18456756/james-holzhauer-jeopardy-winner-alex-trebek-ken-jennings\">an improvised buzzer\u003c/a>—a mechanical pencil wrapped in masking tape.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> success hasn't changed his life much yet—\"I would say I'm currently a C-list celebrity with Vegas locals,\" Holzhauer says. But that may be different when he visits his hometown of Naperville, Ill., where he hears his success is generating a lot of buzz. \"My dad has never been more popular,\" he adds.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>",
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"content": "\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And at this point, he says sportsbook managers have said they are rooting for him. \"Maybe they think I will stop betting on sports if I stay on \u003cem>Jeopardy!\u003c/em> forever,\" Holzhauer adds.\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">\u003cem>Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org\">NPR\u003c/a>.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=Huge+Bets%2C+Fast+Buzzer%3A+Sports+Bettor+Smashes+%27Jeopardy%21%27+Records&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/em>\u003c/div>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>",
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"order": 10
},
"link": "/californiareportmagazine",
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"google": "https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5tZWdhcGhvbmUuZm0vS1FJTkM3NjkwNjk1OTAz",
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},
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"id": "city-arts",
"title": "City Arts & Lectures",
"info": "A one-hour radio program to hear celebrated writers, artists and thinkers address contemporary ideas and values, often discussing the creative process. Please note: tapes or transcripts are not available",
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"airtime": "SUN 1pm-2pm, TUE 10pm, WED 1am",
"meta": {
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"source": "City Arts & Lectures"
},
"link": "https://www.cityarts.net",
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"rss": "https://www.cityarts.net/feed/"
}
},
"closealltabs": {
"id": "closealltabs",
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"officialWebsiteLink": "/podcasts/closealltabs",
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"order": 1
},
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"title": "Code Switch / Life Kit",
"info": "\u003cem>Code Switch\u003c/em>, which listeners will hear in the first part of the hour, has fearless and much-needed conversations about race. Hosted by journalists of color, the show tackles the subject of race head-on, exploring how it impacts every part of society — from politics and pop culture to history, sports and more.\u003cbr />\u003cbr />\u003cem>Life Kit\u003c/em>, which will be in the second part of the hour, guides you through spaces and feelings no one prepares you for — from finances to mental health, from workplace microaggressions to imposter syndrome, from relationships to parenting. The show features experts with real world experience and shares their knowledge. Because everyone needs a little help being human.\u003cbr />\u003cbr />\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/podcasts/510312/codeswitch\">\u003cem>Code Switch\u003c/em> offical site and podcast\u003c/a>\u003cbr />\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/lifekit\">\u003cem>Life Kit\u003c/em> offical site and podcast\u003c/a>\u003cbr />",
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"google": "https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnByLm9yZy9yc3MvcG9kY2FzdC5waHA_aWQ9NTEwMzEy",
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"id": "commonwealth-club",
"title": "Commonwealth Club of California Podcast",
"info": "The Commonwealth Club of California is the nation's oldest and largest public affairs forum. As a non-partisan forum, The Club brings to the public airwaves diverse viewpoints on important topics. The Club's weekly radio broadcast - the oldest in the U.S., dating back to 1924 - is carried across the nation on public radio stations and is now podcasting. Our website archive features audio of our recent programs, as well as selected speeches from our long and distinguished history. This podcast feed is usually updated twice a week and is always un-edited.",
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"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Commonwealth-Club-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg",
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"source": "Commonwealth Club of California"
},
"link": "/radio/program/commonwealth-club",
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"google": "https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cDovL3d3dy5jb21tb253ZWFsdGhjbHViLm9yZy9hdWRpby9wb2RjYXN0L3dlZWtseS54bWw",
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"id": "forum",
"title": "Forum",
"tagline": "The conversation starts here",
"info": "KQED’s live call-in program discussing local, state, national and international issues, as well as in-depth interviews.",
"airtime": "MON-FRI 9am-11am, 10pm-11pm",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Forum-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg",
"imageAlt": "KQED Forum with Mina Kim and Alexis Madrigal",
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"source": "kqed",
"order": 9
},
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"google": "https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5tZWdhcGhvbmUuZm0vS1FJTkM5NTU3MzgxNjMz",
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"officialWebsiteLink": "http://freakonomics.com/",
"airtime": "SUN 1am-2am, SAT 3pm-4pm",
"meta": {
"site": "radio",
"source": "WNYC"
},
"link": "/radio/program/freakonomics-radio",
"subscribe": {
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"apple": "https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/freakonomics-radio/id354668519",
"tuneIn": "https://tunein.com/podcasts/WNYC-Podcasts/Freakonomics-Radio-p272293/",
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},
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"id": "fresh-air",
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"link": "/radio/program/fresh-air",
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"apple": "https://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?s=143441&mt=2&id=214089682&at=11l79Y&ct=nprdirectory",
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"rss": "https://feeds.npr.org/381444908/podcast.xml"
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"info": "A live production of NPR and WBUR Boston, in collaboration with stations across the country, Here & Now reflects the fluid world of news as it's happening in the middle of the day, with timely, in-depth news, interviews and conversation. Hosted by Robin Young, Jeremy Hobson and Tonya Mosley.",
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"rss": "https://feeds.npr.org/510051/podcast.xml"
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},
"hidden-brain": {
"id": "hidden-brain",
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"info": "Shankar Vedantam uses science and storytelling to reveal the unconscious patterns that drive human behavior, shape our choices and direct our relationships.",
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"airtime": "SUN 7pm-8pm",
"meta": {
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"source": "NPR"
},
"link": "/radio/program/hidden-brain",
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},
"how-i-built-this": {
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"title": "How I Built This with Guy Raz",
"info": "Guy Raz dives into the stories behind some of the world's best known companies. How I Built This weaves a narrative journey about innovators, entrepreneurs and idealists—and the movements they built.",
"imageSrc": "https://ww2.kqed.org/news/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2018/05/howIBuiltThis.png",
"officialWebsiteLink": "https://www.npr.org/podcasts/510313/how-i-built-this",
"airtime": "SUN 7:30pm-8pm",
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},
"link": "/radio/program/how-i-built-this",
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"npr": "https://rpb3r.app.goo.gl/3zxy",
"apple": "https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/how-i-built-this-with-guy-raz/id1150510297?mt=2",
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"hyphenacion": {
"id": "hyphenacion",
"title": "Hyphenación",
"tagline": "Where conversation and cultura meet",
"info": "What kind of no sabo word is Hyphenación? For us, it’s about living within a hyphenation. Like being a third-gen Mexican-American from the Texas border now living that Bay Area Chicano life. Like Xorje! Each week we bring together a couple of hyphenated Latinos to talk all about personal life choices: family, careers, relationships, belonging … everything is on the table. ",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Hyphenacion_FinalAssets_PodcastTile.png",
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"officialWebsiteLink": "/podcasts/hyphenacion",
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"order": 15
},
"link": "/podcasts/hyphenacion",
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"spotify": "https://open.spotify.com/show/2p3Fifq96nw9BPcmFdIq0o?si=39209f7b25774f38",
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},
"jerrybrown": {
"id": "jerrybrown",
"title": "The Political Mind of Jerry Brown",
"tagline": "Lessons from a lifetime in politics",
"info": "The Political Mind of Jerry Brown brings listeners the wisdom of the former Governor, Mayor, and presidential candidate. Scott Shafer interviewed Brown for more than 40 hours, covering the former governor's life and half-century in the political game – and Brown has some lessons he'd like to share. ",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/The-Political-Mind-of-Jerry-Brown-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg",
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"officialWebsiteLink": "/podcasts/jerrybrown",
"meta": {
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"order": 18
},
"link": "/podcasts/jerrybrown",
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"apple": "https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/id1492194549",
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}
},
"latino-usa": {
"id": "latino-usa",
"title": "Latino USA",
"airtime": "MON 1am-2am, SUN 6pm-7pm",
"info": "Latino USA, the radio journal of news and culture, is the only national, English-language radio program produced from a Latino perspective.",
"imageSrc": "https://ww2.kqed.org/radio/wp-content/uploads/sites/50/2018/04/latinoUsa.jpg",
"officialWebsiteLink": "http://latinousa.org/",
"meta": {
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"source": "npr"
},
"link": "/radio/program/latino-usa",
"subscribe": {
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"apple": "https://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?s=143441&mt=2&id=79681317&at=11l79Y&ct=nprdirectory",
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"rss": "https://feeds.npr.org/510016/podcast.xml"
}
},
"marketplace": {
"id": "marketplace",
"title": "Marketplace",
"info": "Our flagship program, helmed by Kai Ryssdal, examines what the day in money delivered, through stories, conversations, newsworthy numbers and more. Updated Monday through Friday at about 3:30 p.m. PT.",
"airtime": "MON-FRI 4pm-4:30pm, MON-WED 6:30pm-7pm",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Marketplace-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg",
"officialWebsiteLink": "https://www.marketplace.org/",
"meta": {
"site": "news",
"source": "American Public Media"
},
"link": "/radio/program/marketplace",
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"rss": "https://feeds.publicradio.org/public_feeds/marketplace-pm/rss/rss"
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},
"masters-of-scale": {
"id": "masters-of-scale",
"title": "Masters of Scale",
"info": "Masters of Scale is an original podcast in which LinkedIn co-founder and Greylock Partner Reid Hoffman sets out to describe and prove theories that explain how great entrepreneurs take their companies from zero to a gazillion in ingenious fashion.",
"airtime": "Every other Wednesday June 12 through October 16 at 8pm (repeats Thursdays at 2am)",
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"officialWebsiteLink": "https://mastersofscale.com/",
"meta": {
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"source": "WaitWhat"
},
"link": "/radio/program/masters-of-scale",
"subscribe": {
"apple": "http://mastersofscale.app.link/",
"rss": "https://rss.art19.com/masters-of-scale"
}
},
"mindshift": {
"id": "mindshift",
"title": "MindShift",
"tagline": "A podcast about the future of learning and how we raise our kids",
"info": "The MindShift podcast explores the innovations in education that are shaping how kids learn. Hosts Ki Sung and Katrina Schwartz introduce listeners to educators, researchers, parents and students who are developing effective ways to improve how kids learn. We cover topics like how fed-up administrators are developing surprising tactics to deal with classroom disruptions; how listening to podcasts are helping kids develop reading skills; the consequences of overparenting; and why interdisciplinary learning can engage students on all ends of the traditional achievement spectrum. This podcast is part of the MindShift education site, a division of KQED News. KQED is an NPR/PBS member station based in San Francisco. You can also visit the MindShift website for episodes and supplemental blog posts or tweet us \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/MindShiftKQED\">@MindShiftKQED\u003c/a> or visit us at \u003ca href=\"/mindshift\">MindShift.KQED.org\u003c/a>",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Mindshift-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg",
"imageAlt": "KQED MindShift: How We Will Learn",
"officialWebsiteLink": "/mindshift/",
"meta": {
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"source": "kqed",
"order": 12
},
"link": "/podcasts/mindshift",
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"google": "https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5tZWdhcGhvbmUuZm0vS1FJTkM1NzY0NjAwNDI5",
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}
},
"morning-edition": {
"id": "morning-edition",
"title": "Morning Edition",
"info": "\u003cem>Morning Edition\u003c/em> takes listeners around the country and the world with multi-faceted stories and commentaries every weekday. Hosts Steve Inskeep, David Greene and Rachel Martin bring you the latest breaking news and features to prepare you for the day.",
"airtime": "MON-FRI 3am-9am",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Morning-Edition-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg",
"officialWebsiteLink": "https://www.npr.org/programs/morning-edition/",
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"link": "/radio/program/morning-edition"
},
"onourwatch": {
"id": "onourwatch",
"title": "On Our Watch",
"tagline": "Deeply-reported investigative journalism",
"info": "For decades, the process for how police police themselves has been inconsistent – if not opaque. In some states, like California, these proceedings were completely hidden. After a new police transparency law unsealed scores of internal affairs files, our reporters set out to examine these cases and the shadow world of police discipline. On Our Watch brings listeners into the rooms where officers are questioned and witnesses are interrogated to find out who this system is really protecting. Is it the officers, or the public they've sworn to serve?",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/On-Our-Watch-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg",
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"officialWebsiteLink": "/podcasts/onourwatch",
"meta": {
"site": "news",
"source": "kqed",
"order": 11
},
"link": "/podcasts/onourwatch",
"subscribe": {
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"google": "https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5ucHIub3JnLzUxMDM2MC9wb2RjYXN0LnhtbD9zYz1nb29nbGVwb2RjYXN0cw",
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},
"on-the-media": {
"id": "on-the-media",
"title": "On The Media",
"info": "Our weekly podcast explores how the media 'sausage' is made, casts an incisive eye on fluctuations in the marketplace of ideas, and examines threats to the freedom of information and expression in America and abroad. For one hour a week, the show tries to lift the veil from the process of \"making media,\" especially news media, because it's through that lens that we see the world and the world sees us",
"airtime": "SUN 2pm-3pm, MON 12am-1am",
"imageSrc": "https://ww2.kqed.org/radio/wp-content/uploads/sites/50/2018/04/onTheMedia.png",
"officialWebsiteLink": "https://www.wnycstudios.org/shows/otm",
"meta": {
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"source": "wnyc"
},
"link": "/radio/program/on-the-media",
"subscribe": {
"apple": "https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/on-the-media/id73330715?mt=2",
"tuneIn": "https://tunein.com/radio/On-the-Media-p69/",
"rss": "http://feeds.wnyc.org/onthemedia"
}
},
"pbs-newshour": {
"id": "pbs-newshour",
"title": "PBS NewsHour",
"info": "Analysis, background reports and updates from the PBS NewsHour putting today's news in context.",
"airtime": "MON-FRI 3pm-4pm",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/PBS-News-Hour-Podcast-Tile-360x360-1.jpg",
"officialWebsiteLink": "https://www.pbs.org/newshour/",
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"source": "pbs"
},
"link": "/radio/program/pbs-newshour",
"subscribe": {
"apple": "https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/pbs-newshour-full-show/id394432287?mt=2",
"tuneIn": "https://tunein.com/radio/PBS-NewsHour---Full-Show-p425698/",
"rss": "https://www.pbs.org/newshour/feeds/rss/podcasts/show"
}
},
"perspectives": {
"id": "perspectives",
"title": "Perspectives",
"tagline": "KQED's series of daily listener commentaries since 1991",
"info": "KQED's series of daily listener commentaries since 1991.",
"imageSrc": "https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Perspectives_Tile_Final.jpg",
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"officialWebsiteLink": "/perspectives/",
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"source": "kqed",
"order": 14
},
"link": "/perspectives",
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