Jon Stewart To Leave 'The Daily Show' [Updated]

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Remember when Jon Stewart left his Daily Show post to shoot his first film in Jordan and your life wasn't the same, but you managed to survive (just barely)? Well, I'm going to need you to hold onto that perservering strength while you read this statement from Comedy Central:

First Colbert leaves us and now Jon Stewart?! So much of America is going to have to seek therapy for these abandonment issues. I would write more, but I'm too busy crying.

Update: Watch Jon Stewart announce his departure: