Emmett Yu shares about embracing and learning to accept his birthmark.
When I was born, my shoulder was stuck behind my mom’s pelvic bone, making for a difficult three-hour delivery. Doctors tried everything: vacuum, forceps, every method, before I was finally delivered. As the doctor handed me to my mom, he said, “The red spot on your baby’s face is a port wine stain, not an injury from the delivery.” That was my introduction to life with a vascular birthmark.
Port wine stains are rare — only three per 1,000 babies are born with them. Mine covered the left side of my face, and while not a health threat, no one could prepare me for what it meant to grow up visibly different. Growing up in the East Bay, I was easy to recognize. Teachers and friends knew me as the kid with the birthmark. Yet, I never felt defined by it.
From a young age, I understood my birthmark was one part of me. In seventh grade, I started researching stories online about others with port wine stains. To my surprise, many viewed their birthmarks as a burden, hurting their self-esteem and relationships. That wasn’t my experience, so I sought to understand why.
Guided by my parents and my dermatologist, we created a framework to categorize reactions: curiosity, concern and cruelty. Despite the reactions I received, I learned to give the same respectful, assured response: “It’s just my birthmark. Nothing to worry about.” Then the conversation moved on.
Equipped with a framework and responses, I never felt ashamed. Those who know me don’t think of my birthmark first — they remember the song I performed at my concert or how I helped them with homework. My experience taught me that instead of trying to “fix” visible differences, we should change our reactions.
Those with visible differences face constant judgment and isolation. First impressions form in seconds, but true character takes time to reveal. My birthmark is part of my story, but it will never be the whole book. With a Perspective, I’m Emmett Yu.
Emmett Yu is a high school student. He enjoys reading, playing the drums and folding origami.