Imagine if Parents and Teens
Knew More About Each Other...

How parents could better understand their teens
How teens could better understand their parents

By knowing more about your teens, you will probably understand them better.

• Find out more about your teen's life -- school, work, relationships, activities.
• Know more about your teen's friends.
• Find common ground, such as similar stress that parents and teens share.
• Learn your teen's personality, how they express who they really are.
• Remember that teens want and need encouragement and positive comments from parents.
• Discover what teens learn in school: their work is not easy.
• Think about why it is important for teens to have a social life.
• Consider how allowing teens to be more independent now could better prepare them for the future.
• Learn to know your teen's personality.
• Try to know what your teen likes and dislikes.
• Understand how your teen feel about decisions you make.
• Find out how your teen feels about "criminal" activities (stealing, drugs, underage drinking).
• Remember that reverse psychology/negative criticism doesn't always help your teen.
• Trust that your teen knows what he or she is talking about.
• Consider how your teen reacts and acts at home and outside of home.

By knowing more about your parents, you will probably understand them better.

• Find out more about your parents' lives.
• Ask about their past and how your parents were raised.
• Learn about good things and positive experiences in your parents' lives.
• Ask how your parents met each other.
• Find out what your parents did for fun growing up.
• Learn your parents' likes and dislikes.
• Ask about your parents dating and love life.

  Here are some questions you could ask your parents:

• Did your parents have any peer pressure when they were teenagers?
• What things do your parents wish they had done as a teen?
• How did their parents treated them?
• What did your parents think about when they came to the US?
• Why don't your parents have more children?
• Did your parents ever rebel against their parents and what happened?
• What type of people were your parents when they were your age?
• How did your parents treat their brothers and sisters growing up?
• What conflicts did your parents have with their parents at your age?
• Did your parents have an arranged marriage and if so, how did they feel about it?
• Did their parents encourage them and how?
• Do your parents think that their life was better in the past or now?
• What do your parents want to do after retirement?
• How come your parents never talk about ancestors or dead people in your family?
• How is having kids different from what your parents expected?
• What would your parents change about themselves?
• Do your parents regret anything about having kids?
• Do your parents expect different things from boys and girls, and why?
• Did their parents treat boys and girls differently, and how did they feel about that?
• What do your parents think their greatest talents are?
• What your parents wish they could do in their career?
• Do your parents have any regrets?
• How do your parents decide when to encourage you and when to pressure you?
• What would make your parents give you more independence?